Title: A Stretch of Mortal Time - B

Author: Islaofhope

Pairing: Sarek/Kirk, K/S

Rating: NC-17 for m/m sex

Summary: Kirk and Sarek work together on a diplomatic assignment. When Kirk receives a message from Spock announcing his betrothal, Sarek is surprised to discover that Kirk is "available."

Feedback: islaofhope@aol.com. Both positive and negative feedback accepted. Flames cheerfully laughed at.

Disclaimer: All things Star Trek belong to Paramount and Viacom. This is a not-for-profit piece of fan fiction, not intended to infringe on their copyright.

Notes: Notes: There are two versions. Version A was posted to ASCEML and versions B was posted to Kirk Loves Spock Fic. Now I have to decide which one to put on my website, which is at: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Dunes/7382

I blame Animasola for the story. When she was reading "The Same Mistake," she was intrigued by the apparent intimacy between Kirk and Sarek, and she dared me to take it further.

I thank Jat and T'Aaneli for also betaing and for accepting the premise (just barely).

And thank you to Kaki, my first beta, for making a return appearance to look at this story; she confessed that she already had a Sarek/Kirk fetish. I further want to thank her for inspiring a father-son talk in this story. This talk took place off-screen in one of her works-in-progress, but it inspired me when I wrote this one.

And I thank Elton John and Tim Rice for "Written in the Stars" from Aida, which inspired me to choose how the story ended.



"A Stretch of Mortal Time"
by Islaofhope

. . . Never wonder what I'll feel as living shuffles by
You don't have to ask me and I need not reply . . .

"James, I wished to discuss . . ." Sarek paused in the doorway to Kirk's room.

Kirk, clad in nothing but a pair of dark trousers, was sprawled on the bed with his hands behind his head, and his eyes fixed on the ceiling. His uniform tunic was thrown over a chair, his boots and socks were strewn on the floor, and books and padds were piled haphazardly on the desk. They had been sharing a suite throughout the negotiations, and both had grown used to walking into the other's room unannounced, but Sarek had never seen Kirk's room in such disarray.

Pressing his hands together, Sarek took a deep breath and averted his eyes from Kirk's bare chest. "What is amiss? Is there trouble on your ship? Let me help."

Kirk's faraway look was replaced by a slight widening of his eyes followed by a shaky smile. "My ship is fine. It's my first officer who's about to make the biggest mistake of his life." He flushed and turned his head away for a moment before he swung his legs off the bed and sat up. He rested his elbows on his knees, and his chin in his hands. Looking up into Sarek's eyes, he said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I'm sure that Spock is doing what he thinks is best."

Impulsively, Sarek approached him. His hand hovered over Kirk's shoulder but dropped to dangle at his side. "What has Spock done?"

Kirk squeezed his eyes shut. "You don't know, do you? He's agreed to marry . . . I forgot her name." He opened his eyes and stared at the opposite wall.

Sarek gripped his hands in the sleeves of his robes. "I did not expect this."

As if he couldn't stand still, Kirk leapt to his feet and crossed the room. "I should have seen it coming, but I didn't expect it either." He turned to glare at Sarek. "You must be relieved."

He examined his well-controlled emotions, but relief was not one that he found there. "I am not. I am puzzled. I had assumed that you and Spock were t'hy'la."

Amusement and pain warred in Kirk's brilliant eyes. "We are t'hy'la, but we're not lovers." He leaned against a wall, holding himself up with one hand and staring at the floor. "I didn't expect to discuss this with you."

Relief was definitely one of the emotions that Sarek next experienced. But what could be the reason for that relief? "I believe that the appropriate response is, 'I am sorry.' You would prefer that you were lovers, would you not?"

Kirk flushed again. "I don't think that we should be discussing this."

"Because I am his father?"

"Because you're a Vulcan!" Kirk's response came out almost as a shout. He wrapped his arms around his chest and blinked twice, before his eyes returned to Sarek's. "Forgive me, Ambassador. I've enjoyed the time we've spent working together. I'd rather not spoil it by talking about something that . . . " He shook his head. "It would be wrong to discuss what is private between Spock and me. And it was wrong for me to tell you about his betrothal. That's news that should have come from your son."

Kirk squared his shoulders and fixed on a smile that was a fair imitation of his usual expression. "I'm going to take a shower, and get ready for dinner. The Vancerillian ambassador told me about a place that I think you would enjoy."

Sarek nodded mutely. Because it would be rude to walk out while Kirk was speaking, he remained in the room as Kirk stripped off his pants and briefs, unconcernedly displaying his firm, muscular body. Kirk continued to talk about plans for the evening while he walked into the bathroom and activated the shower.

After he had returned to his own room, Sarek considered his reactions to Kirk's news.

Sarek and Spock had never been close, and Amanda's death nearly a year before had seemed to break what fragile connection existed between them.

James Kirk, however, continued to be a bridge between father and son. As a condition of opening negotiations, the Vancerillian council had requested Kirk's participation. Fortunately, Starfleet was able to spare him while the Enterprise underwent an engine upgrade. Sarek was pleased to be working with Kirk; he continued to be as favorably impressed as he had been in earlier contacts with his son's captain.

And that night they dined alone. At Kirk's request, they were seated on the patio, and equal parts candlelight and moonlight lit his handsome face. The restaurant's menu included several Vulcan delicacies and both selected the evening's special.

They had shared such a meal the last time Kirk had visited Vulcan. Shortly after Spock had left Gol to rejoin the Enterprise, Kirk had accompanied him to Vulcan during Amanda's final illness. He had sat beside Spock at Amanda's deathbed and had stood between father and son at the memorial service.

Neither Sarek nor Spock easily found words to say to each other, and after the service, Kirk had insisted that they sit with him while he prepared dinner, and then he cajoled them into eating. Spock had austerely advised him not to resign from Starfleet to open a restaurant on Vulcan. Kirk had been the only one who laughed at the comment, but all had felt the gloom lifting. Sarek had struggled to hide his envy of the deep love and support that Kirk gave unstintingly to Spock.

He now admired the play of light on Kirk's face. He watched his well-shaped hands as he gestured to make a point. He leaned forward as he listened to Kirk speak about the day's negotiations and then about Terran literature and Ancient Vulcan poetry. He breathed in his scent of new-mown hay. He permitted a smile to light his eyes as he enjoyed Kirk's keen observations. Throughout the meal, their fingertips brushed as they reached for the bread tray or the water pitcher at the same time.

If he was still troubled by Spock's betrothal, Kirk gave no sign of it. His conversation was animated, and he smiled, peering out from beneath long lashes gilded by the candlelight. Kirk paused with his wineglass halfway to his lips. "I'm enjoying our time together, Sarek. I almost wish that I didn't have a ship to go back to." He sipped the wine with obvious appreciation, his eyes glowing golden in the moonlight.

Lifting his own glass in a wordless toast, Sarek sipped his wine and considered how pleasant it would be to have such an aide sitting beside him for all of his negotiations. M'Gill was intelligent, but he did not have the fire of this one--a fire that would balance Sarek's coolness. The prospect of a charming dining companion every evening was even more appealing, and for a moment, he allowed his thoughts to take him further down this path.

Carefully replacing his wineglass on the table, Sarek reached across the table to touch the back of Kirk's wrist. "It is hardly logical to wish for what cannot be." Nonetheless, Sarek speculated anyway: James Kirk was a starship captain used to the limelight. Could he be satisfied trailing behind the Vulcan ambassador?

Kirk's breathing accelerated somewhat, and he leaned fractionally closer, his voice lowering intimately as they spoke in jest concerning where their next diplomatic mission would take them together . . . if the Enterprise were not due to fetch her captain at the end of the week.

Four days. Fortunately, the days on Vancerillius were longer than on Terra. Although not as long as on Vulcan.

They agreed to walk the moonlit three kilometers back to their hotel suite, and Sarek considered the logical use to be made of those few days. Logic? What had logic to do with what was going through his mind. He smiled secretly to himself, but Kirk turned to glance at him and caught the smile.

"Ambassador? You look as though . . . " Kirk stopped walking, and his hand hovered centimeters above Sarek's arm before it dropped to his side.

Lightly touching Kirk's elbow to steer them to the railing that overlooked the river, Sarek said, "Perhaps we can agree that at least while we are alone, I will call you James and you will call me Sarek. The ambassador and the admiral can disappear for tonight."

"Tonight?" Kirk repeated after a quick in-drawn breath. His smile was tremulous. "If I didn't know better . . ."

Sarek looked down into Kirk's eyes; they stood so close together that he could feel cool breath on his lips. "James." He laid his fingers on Kirk's temple, and when Kirk gazed back at him, his expression was one of absolute trust; Sarek's hand trembled. He had touched no mind other than Amanda's in several years.

"Sarek," Kirk whispered. He swallowed. "Why?"

Sarek's eyes widened. An excellent question. "I do not know," he answered, not altogether truthfully. When Sarek's hand fell away, Kirk grasped it and brought it to his lips, his kiss singeing Sarek's fingertips.

Kirk said, "Maybe it's better to wait until we both know why."

Sarek closed his eyes as the contact sent a jolt of electricity down his arm and across his chest, and down further, heating his groin. The Vulcan ambassador could not recall the last time he had been left speechless.

Kirk stepped away from the railing, heading back to their hotel. Sarek squared his shoulders and followed him. Soon they were speaking of the following day's schedule as though nothing unusual had passed between them. When they reached their lodgings, by mutual unspoken agreement each retreated to his own room.

As Sarek prepared for meditation, he wondered if Kirk would fall asleep immediately. His mind painted a picture of James' head on a pillow, his bronze hair tousled, his eyes closed in slumber, and then Sarek filled in the details of the rest of the body. No doubt Kirk slept in the nude, and in a room heated for a Vulcan's comfort, he would toss off the covers.

He imagined this passionate Terran sharing his bed every night. Amanda's long illness had robbed Sarek of a bedmate for many months; before this evening, no being had caused his imagination to catch fire since her death. And James Kirk had a Federation-wide reputation as a lover that had been enhanced by the general assumption that he had taken his Vulcan first officer as his mate.

Sarek found it necessary to spend most of the night in meditation.

Initially, Sarek focused on the music and the cool fingers that entwined with his. Then he widened his awareness to consider Kirk's other hand on his shoulder.

Kirk's soft breath stirred the air beside Sarek's ear, and his scent flooded Sarek's awareness. Sarek's hand rested lightly on the small of Kirk's back, and he could feel the muscles rippling under the silky tunic, which Kirk wore tonight instead of his Starfleet uniform. They held themselves carefully apart, so that their abdomens did not touch, but the turns in the intricate dance caused their limbs to brush against each other's bodies randomly.

Sarek tilted his head down to gaze at Kirk. His eyes were closed, and his lips were slightly parted, almost as if he were silently counting off the beat as he followed Sarek across the dance floor. But, of course, Kirk's lips did not move, and he was far too adroit for the dance to be anything but effortless.

For the first hour of the evening, Sarek had watched Kirk across the room, watched him award his smiles to one being after another and listened to his musical laughter. When Sarek admitted to himself that he wanted those smiles and that laughter to be directed at him alone, he had crossed the room. Kirk had turned to him eagerly, accepting Sarek's hand and following him onto the dance floor.

Sarek's fingers tightened convulsively; nothing had changed about Kirk tonight. It was Sarek who was transformed by the knowledge that Kirk did not belong to his son. He could be Sarek's.

Kirk's eyes opened and his hand on Sarek's shoulder tensed, pulling him fractionally closer. "Ambassador, are you--?"

Sarek lifted an eyebrow in gentle amusement. "I am well, James. But it seems strange for you to call me 'Ambassador' while you are in my arms on a dance floor."

Kirk tilted his head fractionally. "I think we're still on diplomatic duty. Would we still be here if duty did not require it?"

Unthinkingly, he brushed his lips against Kirk's hair. "What are you suggesting?"

Kirk's arms tightened around Sarek, and they both seemed to forget that they were holding each other in the middle of a dance floor at the closing reception to celebrate Vancellerius' entrance into the Federation. "Sarek, why don't we duck out?"

"'Duck out,' James?" Sarek allowed a smile to light his eyes. "In all my years in the diplomatic service, I have never done such a thing." Sarek sighed and closed his eyes, concentrating on the smooth texture of Kirk's tunic and the cool body beneath it. "I do not believe that it would cause any difficulty."

Kirk flashed a wide smile. "As you wish, sir." He shivered when Sarek unhanded him. Sarek tried to walk sedately as he escaped the dance floor with Kirk at his side.

"Ambassador, Admiral, have a pleasant evening." M'Gill's eyes were expressionless as they swept over Sarek and Kirk. Did his aide suspect what was in Sarek's mind when he looked at James?

"Good night, M'Gill," Kirk said pleasantly. "Enjoy your time off tomorrow."

"And you, Admiral."

Sarek was aware of the question in M'Gill's eyes, but he ignored it. Since Amanda's death, those dark eyes frequently held ill-concealed concern. He was not surprised to discover that his aide was disturbed. Kirk was, after all, a male Terran. A male Terran who was known to be his son's t'hy'la.

He did not need Vulcan hearing to catch the Vancellerian ambassador's comment to his own mate. "An interesting development." Kirk heard the comment, too, and he darted an amused glance at Sarek.

Silently, they walked out into the humid night. Sarek considered seizing his hand, but Kirk's suddenly remote expression caused Sarek to hesitate. A late-arriving guest paused in the doorway, and his eyes confirmed Sarek's opinion that Kirk looked breathtaking this evening. Kirk's expression was neutral, as though he didn't notice the man's eyes on him, but Sarek fixed the stranger with a stare so cold that he looked away in confusion.

The walk to their suite was a short one. When the door closed behind them, Kirk turned to study him, his eyes still giving away none of his thoughts. "Would you like a drink?"

"No. I would not." Sarek swallowed and put out a tentative hand.

Kirk took that hand and brought it to his lips. "Me, neither. I just want you." His smile was a small nova temporarily blinding Sarek as Kirk moved closer.

The breath caught in Sarek's throat. The period of time when he could not speak was less than a second, but it seemed to stretch for several minutes. When he recovered his equilibrium, Sarek said, "I do not believe . . ." He traced two fingers from Kirk's temple down his jawline and tilted up his chin. " . . . we have determined the answer to last night's question."

"Why we're doing this? We'll figure that out later." Kirk slid his arms around Sarek's waist and pressed their bodies close together.

Sarek grunted softly as the bulk of Kirk's erection pressed against his thigh. "You will allow me to please you tonight?" His fingers lightly stroked the nape of Kirk's neck.

Kirk's eyes dropped, but then he peered up at Sarek through lowered lashes. "Why don't we start with a kiss, Sarek? I would like you to kiss me."

Sarek hesitated, his eyes closed briefly, and his breathing accelerated. "Vulcans do not kiss."

"And starship captains don't bed ambassadors," Kirk said with a grin. His smile faded as he waited, but his eyes continued to shine with amusement.

Sarek lifted an eyebrow, weighing Kirk's request. He pressed his warm lips against the cooler ones. For a moment, they did no more than press their lips together.

Kirk slid one hand behind Sarek's head to hold him there. "Sarek," he whispered, his lips parting, and Sarek slipped his tongue between those lips.

A soft moan vibrated in Sarek's throat. Kirk tilted his head to deepen the kiss. He captured and sucked Kirk's tongue, clutching his shoulders, but he released him when he felt the tremor in the cool fingers at the back of his neck.

He slid one hand along Kirk's chest to unseal his tunic, and eased the garment from his shoulders. The bright hazel eyes fastened on Sarek's, and in answer to the silent question that he saw there, Sarek effortlessly lifted Kirk in his arms, and carried him into his own bedroom.

Kirk let out a surprised laugh, but he didn't struggle or protest; his face became solemn again as Sarek placed him on the bed and wordlessly stripped away the rest of his clothing. Their twin accelerated breathing was the only sound in the still room. Sarek removed his shoes, draped his robe across the foot of the bed, and stretched out beside Kirk, who put up a hand to touch his cheek.

He licked a trail from Kirk's earlobe, down his jawline and against his throat. As he sucked on Kirk's adam's apple, Sarek's fingers molded Kirk's pectorals, and his thumbs teased the nipples to hard peaks.

He moved down Kirk's torso and gently bit one nipple, eliciting a whimper, and then the other, his erection rubbing against Kirk's hip. When Kirk's hand slid down to grasp his penis, Sarek captured that hand, kissing one wrist and then the other before pinning both hands down at Kirk's side before kissing the trembling abdomen. After dipping his tongue in Kirk's navel, Sarek licked outward from that center.

As Kirk writhed under him, Sarek kissed, licked, and nibbled a path from his inner thighs and down his right leg, avoiding his throbbing penis. He kissed his way back up the left leg in the same slow, thorough manner. All the while, he held Kirk's body down, and muffled his moans with fingers pressed to his lips.

He moved back up Kirk's abdomen and chest, burning random kisses into his flesh. Balancing his weight on one hand, Sarek lightly pressed his full length against Kirk. He took his chin in his hand and placed a kiss on his lips.

Eyes dilated to nearly-black, Kirk looked into Sarek's eyes. "I've learned not to take Vulcans seriously when they make sweeping statements. Obviously, some Vulcans do kiss. And very well." His eyes glittered. "Do you fuck as well as you kiss?"

Sarek nearly laughed, but he quickly regained control over his facial features and merely lifted an eyebrow. "Rather than exhibiting false modesty, I will show you, James."

//////////

The fire blazed up to consume him; shortly after Kirk cried out with pleasure as he, too, orgasmed. He rolled onto his side, wrapping his arms around Kirk's waist. His eyes closed as he listened to Kirk's breath slow.

When Kirk started to roll away, Sarek's arms tightened. "Stay. Do not leave me."

He did not realize that he'd spoken aloud until he heard Kirk respond in accented Vulcan, "No, I will not leave thee," settling himself closer against Sarek and lifting his face for a slow kiss. When their mouths parted, Kirk said, "I think we'll both be more comfortable if we get cleaned up and change the sheets."

Sarek, suddenly aware of the oil and semen smearing both of their bodies, agreed and after an additional kiss, followed Kirk into the shower stall.

When he turned from cranking on the water, Kirk's eyes dropped to Sarek's groin and widened with mock alarm. "Again?" He opened a tube of bath oil and squirted a generous amount into Sarek's hand before he faced the wall. When he braced his thighs wide apart, Sarek realized that Kirk was not merely inviting him to scrub his back. "At least, it will be convenient for cleaning up after." Kirk's teasing words turned into a groan as Sarek slid his fingers inside Kirk to prepare him.

///////////

When Sarek woke up, he was alone in his bed, and he wondered if he had imagined his seduction of James Kirk. He smiled faintly, knowing that his memories were too strong for it to have been merely a fantasy. Kirk's scent lingered on his pillow. Pale sunlight shone behind the diaphanous curtains.

Wrapping his robe around his body, he walked into the shared living room. He froze in the doorway when he beheld Kirk, clad only in shorts, his eyes closed, his expression remote as he performed a Vulcan stretching routine. His body was strength and grace personified through the complex movements.

When he had completed the routine, Kirk reclined on his back, his chest rising and falling slowly as he recovered his breath. His eyes opened, and he turned his head to Sarek, a smile lighting his features. "Did I disturb you?"

Sarek took a step forward. "I do find you disturbing, James; however, it is a pleasant disturbance."

Kirk laughed and sat up. "I just got back from a run, and I was about to order breakfast. Are you hungry?" He stood up gracefully and crossed the room to meet Sarek. "I guess it was too much to hope for that you would sleep long enough that I could surprise you with breakfast in bed."

Sarek held out his hands. "I am somewhat at a loss to explain why I slept as long as I did. You have been up for some time?"

Kirk accepted the outstretched hands. "No wonder you slept. You did all the work last night." He moved closer so that their arms slid around each other. He lifted his face for a kiss. "We'll have to remedy that fact."

He began with Kirk's lips, but then he delicately licked at the salt on his temples, on the bridge of his nose, and on his eyelids. "I do not believe that I require breakfast."

With another laugh, Kirk twisted out of Sarek's arms. "I know. Vulcans can go for days without eating. But I'm a weak Terran, and I need to eat to recover my strength." He walked over to the comm unit and placed an order with instructions that breakfast was to be left in their living area.

He then turned his smile on Sarek, held out his hand, and led him back into the bedroom.

Later, Sarek reclined against his pillow and watched entranced as Kirk, naked and sprawled on his stomach, thoroughly licked his fingers clean after eating a juicy peach.

Deciding that it was far too soon to engage in another act of intercourse, Sarek cleared his throat. "James, the routine you were performing earlier. Where did you learn it?"

Kirk's eyes widened. "Spock taught me, of course."

"Of course." Sarek looked away.

Sitting up, Kirk nestled against him, draping Sarek's arm around his stomach. "Please don't freeze up when I say his name. We need to be able to talk about him. He *is* my best friend. My t'hy'la."

Unable to resist, Sarek placed a kiss on the top of James' head. "I am your lover, but we will never be t'hy'la."

Kirk sighed. "What does that mean, Sarek?" He tilted his head, so that he could meet Sarek's eyes. "Does that make this an unequal relationship? I don't feel that way."

T'hy'la in Ancient Vulcan terms was warrior to warrior. What were they? Statesman to warrior?

When Sarek did not answer, Kirk began speaking again. "It does feel strange. I don't intend to replace Amanda." Sarek eased his fingers along the suddenly tense muscles of Kirk's back. "No one will replace Amanda. Neither do I intend to replace Spock in your heart." He let out a soft breath of air when Kirk's hand slid down his belly to tangle in his pubic hair; the gesture was absentminded affection, not yet sexual. "Amanda is gone, so there is no need to speculate on how she would view our relationship." He placed a kiss on the nape of Kirk's neck. "I believe that she would be pleased that I have found some measure of happiness. She refused the death bond, and . . . " He paused, closing his eyes; sensation overwhelmed him as Kirk's strong fingers fondled his penis. "If you would prefer not to speak of this . . . ?"

"No," Kirk murmured. "We need to talk about it. Do you mind if I touch you while we talk?" He smiled faintly, sliding his other hand along Sarek's naked thigh.

"It is most pleasant." Sarek resisted the urge to thrust against Kirk's cool hand. "How will it be when you see Spock again? Your feelings for him are still painful, I believe."

Kirk's hand stilled for a moment before he resumed his tender stroking. "I can't have him. I accepted that a long time ago." He shrugged. "Perhaps it's a failing in me. I've had my heart broken so many times that it's used to being mended."

"Perhaps it is a sign of great courage."

Kirk was silent a moment. "I believe that I owe you the whole truth about Spock and me."

Sarek closed his eyes and breathed in Kirk's scent. He slid his hand along the cool silk of his skin, ruffling the fine, almost invisible golden hairs on his arm. "What you have given me is a precious gift. You are under no obligation."

Kirk did not appear to have heard. "We were lovers once." He swallowed. "We melded one evening just for the pleasure of melding. When we drew apart, we were aroused in each other's arms. I couldn't resist. I sucked his cock.After he came, he knocked me on my ass and escaped. He wouldn't speak to me alone for a week after that. Before he left for Gol, he explained to me why it was a mistake. When he came back, I was so relieved to have him back, I didn't dare bring it up again. We . . . we've melded since. We're still the closest of friends. But I've learned . . . learned to control my feelings for him."

Sarek tensed. The mental contact followed by the physical contact suggested that a bond existed between Kirk and his son. No doubt that bond was the ancilla that explained Kirk's Vulcan language skills.

Envy curled in Sarek's stomach. Kirk had offered his all, but Spock had rejected it. Forcing himself to relax, he said, "Why was it a mistake, James?" As soon as he asked, Kirk's reaction caused Sarek to regret his question.

Kirk pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs and resting his chin on his knees. "Modern Vulcans don't engage in homosexual relationships. Sex is for the purpose of procreation. Sex between two men is not logical." A shudder went through him. "I had to accept that answer, Sarek."

Sarek stared at Kirk's back. "But you know now that it is not true."

Kirk raised his head and turned to look at Sarek. "Obviously," and a trace of amusement returned to his eyes as his hand made a sweeping motion to include both of them. "I believed him for a short time because I had to, or I would . . ." He shook his head. "Now I know the truth. It wasn't so much that it was impossible. It was that he didn't love me enough to accept his desire for me. Despite the fact that you and I are here together, same-sex relationships are still not all that common on Vulcan, are they?"

"James." Sarek smoothed the covers reflectively. "Cultural taboos aside, he may not be so inclined. It is no reflection on his regard for you."

"The strange thing," Kirk said with a harsh laugh, "is that what we did last night . . . I don't know whether it makes it better or worse. Now I know that Vulcans can have same-sex relationships . . . and he was just giving me excuses." He shook his head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring all of this up."

Resolutely, Sarek swung his legs over the side of the bed and reached for his robe. "I believe that it would be well to gain some perspective. Would you care to do some sightseeing? We have seen so little of this world." He paused at the door to the bathroom. "I will shower first."

Kirk jumped out of the bed, and followed him to the door. "First, show me that you're not angry."

"Because you told me the truth?" Sarek turned to take Kirk into his arms. He lowered his mouth to Kirk's cool lips, and kissed him until they were both trembling with need.

Kirk's hand went up to caress the side of Sarek's face. "We've got two more days here. Plenty of time to sightsee. Right now I think I would rather--"

"A logical suggestion, James," Sarek murmured as he pushed him back down on the bed.

******************

"Gentlemen." Kirk's eyes lit up as he stepped off the transporter platform to greet his senior officers.

Spock stepped forward. "Welcome aboard, Captain. I return command to you." Although his greeting was coolly professional, Spock's eyes held the same flame that Sarek had seen in them the first time he had observed his son with his captain. There was love there, but Sarek was uncertain whether it was mixed with desire.

Kirk paused in front of his first officer, an affectionate grin lighting his face. "I trust the refit went well, and you're returning the ship in better condition than I left her."

Montgomery Scott walked around the transporter platform to stand beside Spock. "Sair, you'll be verra pleased with her condition."

Clapping a hand on Scott's shoulder, Kirk said, "I'll hold you to that, engineer." Sarek read consternation in Spock's face when Kirk quickly turned his attention to the engineer, but the emotion quickly disappeared.

"Welcome home, Jim," Leonard McCoy said, stepping forward to grip Kirk's shoulders. "You look good. Are you sure that you weren't on shore leave instead of at a negotiating table day and night?"

Kirk wrapped his arms around McCoy's shoulders in a quick embrace. "Only the days were spent at the negotiating table." After he released McCoy, Kirk turned a wide smile on Sarek. "Ambassador, welcome aboard the Enterprise. You know my officers, of course."

Sarek's eyes met Kirk's and held them; he found it difficult to breathe for a moment. He had not forgotten that James Kirk belonged to his ship and to his officers, but it was still a bitter pill to witness it. Although this ship and these officers were trammels that would ensure that Kirk could never belong to him, Sarek basked in the warmth of his lover's smile.

As Sarek stepped forward to greet them, he caught a puzzled expression on McCoy's face. Was McCoy intuitive enough to have guessed so quickly how matters stood between them? The stiff expression on Spock's face could be put down to Vulcan self-control or the perpetual distance between father and son. Only Scott greeted him with genuine good will.

McCoy recovered sufficiently to say, "Ambassador, I hope you're in good health. You haven't had any recurring problems with your heart, have you?"

"His heart is fine," Kirk said with an intimate smile, clasping Sarek's shoulder. McCoy's eyes widened, and Spock stared at a point three centimeters above his captain's shoulders. Appearing to be oblivious to his officers' discomfort, Kirk said, "You haven't been aboard my ship since I got her back, have you? Do you feel up to a tour?" He glanced over his shoulder at Spock. "Mr. Spock, I can put Sarek in the VIP quarters, can't I?"

"The ambassador is staying?" Spock asked, his eyebrow climbing.

"If you don't have any objection," Kirk teased, as he headed out the door with Sarek on his heels.

//////////

Sarek did not look up when the door chime rang. He pressed the button to open the door, keeping his attention on the report he was completing. All day, he had tried to keep himself too busy to think about Kirk, but Sarek did not have to look up to know who it was. Kirk had recently showered, and the scent of his natural musk was overlaid by the pine shampoo he favored. The jolt of arousal mocked the controls that Sarek had attempted to erect since boarding the Enterprise.

"You're busy. I'm sorry for disturbing you. I shouldn't have come by without calling first."

Sarek compressed his lips, but when he looked up, he leaned back in his chair, savoring the sight of James Kirk, arrayed in loose-fitting exercise pants and a short-sleeve tunic. "Forgive me for not joining you and your officers for dinner. There is much work to be done."

Kirk settled on the side of the desk, stretching out a hand to clasp Sarek's. "We'll reach Vulcan in two days. You have a lot to get done before you get home?" He squeezed Sarek's hand; when Sarek nodded, he released it, and started to rise. "Then I won't disturb you."

With Vulcan speed, Sarek rose from his chair and clasped Kirk to his chest. "Do not go."

"I won't." Kirk closed his eyes and tilted his head back for Sarek's kiss. He chuckled softly. "I'm glad that you have time for me."

Sarek did not respond. He was too busy kissing the sweet mouth, and stripping away Kirk's clothes. His hands roamed, stroking and kneading the smooth flesh. Sarek paused in his tactile worship of the muscular buttocks when Kirk flinched and grunted in pain.

"James?" He backed off and looked down into Kirk's face.

"It's nothing." Kirk grinned sheepishly. " Just a bruise. My first officer knocked me on my ass."

"Spock struck you?" He clutched at Kirk's shoulder. "James, what happened? Why did you not tell me that there was trouble between you? If I am the cause . . ."

Smiling, Kirk lifted a hand to stop the torrent of words. "It was during our workout. I was distracted, and he tried something new. I'm fine, really."

"Your workout?" Sarek looked down, and examined the large discolored area. "This looks painful. Perhaps the doctor--"

"It's nothing," Kirk insisted with a chuckle. "Besides I don't want to show my ass to McCoy. I want to show it to you." He grimaced again when Sarek's hand slid down to cup his buttocks. "Only I think I need to put up a 'handle with care' sign."

Sarek's caresses were more gentle than usual that night. At first, Kirk protested, but soon they found they could give each other just as much pleasure in slow, sweet lovemaking.

Afterwards, Kirk dozed with his head on Sarek's chest, one leg flung across his thighs.

Sarek petted his hair and his upper back thoughtfully. "James?"

"Mmmm?"

"We will be arriving at Vulcan tomorrow."

"Day after," Kirk said sleepily.

He kissed Kirk's temple. "I do not wish to be parted from you."

"The Enterprise is heading for Delta almost immediately after we drop you." Kirk turned his head to kiss Sarek's right nipple, sparking heat that ran from Sarek's chest down to his groin. "And you're headed somewhere else in a couple of days. We'll just have to figure out when we can see each other next."

"And will we see each other again?"

Kirk's hand slid down to rest over Sarek's heart. "Of course." He lifted his head slightly and their eyes met.

"Your ship and my duties as the Vulcan ambassador?" Sarek lifted Kirk's hand to his mouth to kiss the palm. "How many times have we seen each other in the years that we have been acquainted?"

"It's different now, Sarek." Kirk's hazel eyes were solemn, and he pushed a hand back to tame his mussed hair. "We're not just Spock's captain and Spock's father any more. You and me--"

"Stay with me, James. I . . . I care for you. It pleases me to have you with me." Sarek closed his eyes.

Kirk's fingers stroked his cheek. "Look at me." Sarek opened his eyes, and put his hand over Kirk's to hold it there. Kirk's voice was quiet. "I love you, too, but we have different lives."

"We have spoken of changing your life. Your talents could be put to use in the Diplomatic Corps." Sarek raised himself on one elbow, and put his hand on Kirk's heart. "Starfleet is not the whole Universe."

Kirk swallowed. "I know we talked about it, but we were only joking."

"I am not making a joke now." He leaned over to kiss Kirk's forehead. "I do not insist on an answer now. I only ask that you consider it."

Reaching a hand around his neck, Kirk drew Sarek's mouth down to his own and kissed him slowly and deeply, his tongue tasting of the lovemaking they had already shared that evening. When their mouths drew apart, Kirk said, "I promise I'll consider it. For now, I want you to love me."

"I have said it," Sarek responded solemnly.

A smile lit Kirk's eyes. "I meant physically. I should have said, 'I want you to fuck me.'"

Sarek forced a smile to show in his eyes. "A starship captain uses many tools, but a diplomat's only tool is words. The precision of using those words is critical." As he spoke, Sarek pulled down the covers, rolled Kirk onto his back, and slid his hands over his body, enthralled by the acceleration of Kirk's breath and heartbeat and the dilation of the hazel eyes. "My heart, I will fuck you. I will fuck you so that you will wish to share my bed every night."

***************

When Sarek woke up, he discovered that the other half of the bed was empty. He recalled waking up briefly when Kirk had kissed him before returning to his quarters to prepare for his duty shift. He turned on his back to stare at the ceiling. He tried to picture Kirk sitting in his command chair on his bridge, but found that he could not.

He flinched when his door chime sounded. Glancing at the chronometer, he wondered who would be disturbing him at such an early hour. Pulling on a robe, he strode out to the work area, and keyed the door.

Sarek should not have been surprised to see his son walk in. The only other person he would have expected was Leonard McCoy. He gestured to invite his son to be seated. "Spock, you have come to see me on your way to your duty station. It is agreeable to see you. We have not spoken--"

"Ambassador, you are mistaken if you believe that I am here for idle social chatter," Spock said sharply.

Sarek's voice was coolly controlled when he said, "Your manners have not improved. One would expect that Admiral Kirk's example would have--"

"It is of him that I would speak." Spock gripped his hands behind his back.

Sarek cleared his throat. "I am most interested to hear what you have to say."

"You are . . . you have entered into a sexual relationship with him." Spock paused and swallowed, looking away. "It is understandable that you would find him seductive; however, I would expect you to have better judgment."

"Seductive? He is intelligent, charming, and passionate." As Sarek said the words, he studied Spock to evaluate his reaction. "He is a man of the greatest integrity. The fact that his face and his body are beautiful has not escaped my notice." The flash of anger that crossed his face betrayed Spock's secret desire for his captain. "And he has a very fine mind."

Spock took an angry step forward. "His mind? What are you saying?"

Sarek turned and sat down on the chair behind the desk. "No, Spock, I have not taken his mind." He steepled his fingers in front of him and paused for a moment before continuing. "I have considered asking him to become my bondmate, my chosen one before all Vulcan. Only after we are formally betrothed will I touch his mind. In accordance with Vulcan custom."

"Your bondmate?" Spock's voice had risen to a shout, but he breathed deeply, took a few nervous steps across the room, and lowered his voice. "He is entirely unsuited to be your bondmate. He is . . . " Spock shook his head and fell silent.

"In love with you," Sarek said quietly. He stared down at his hands, but he was aware of the quick rise and fall of Spock's chest as he struggled for control. "It is of no consequence. You do not desire him. You have chosen another. He is not a fool to cry after someone he cannot have. When I knew that you had rejected him, I hesitated for less than a day before I took him."

"You have not touched his mind?" Spock sank down onto the chair across from his father, gripping his hands in his lap.

"I knew what I would find there. His bond with you." At Spock's soft exclamation, Sarek fixed his eyes on his son. "Yes, I know of it. Even James suspects that it is there. It will be necessary, of course, to break that bond when you marry T'Engano, but I will be there to make him whole again."

Spock shifted uncomfortably and stared down at his hands. "You cannot want a starship captain as your bondmate. He will be--"

"You are correct," Sarek said calmly. "I have asked him to resign from Starfleet. To stay with me."

Spock sprang to his feet again and began to pace the room in an unconscious imitation of his captain. "He is a starship captain. It is his first, best destiny. To expect him to be your diplomatic aide is a waste of resources. You did not ask my mother to follow you around like a pet. Why would you ask that of him?"

Sarek's eyes followed his son. "He is a brilliant negotiator, and he would do well at whatever he chooses."

"Whatever *he* chooses," Spock repeated. "Not what you have chosen for him."

Sarek stood up. "I did not say that he has agreed to stay with me."

Spock's shoulders sagged in relief. "He has not?"

"No." Sarek also felt a stab of relief, but it was leavened with a dash of sadness as he planted himself in front of Spock. "What will you do now, Spock? Will you make him an honorable offer of marriage?"

Spock's eyebrow climbed. "It cannot be. I have agreed to become betrothed to another."

"You do not desire him?" Sarek searched Spock's face. "If you wish, I can forbid your betrothal to T'Engano. You will be free to take him as your bondmate."

Spock's eyes widened. "I do not understand you, Ambassador. How can you suggest this when you assert that you wish him as your bondmate?"

Sarek gripped his hands in front of him. "Have you considered the possibility that I desire his happiness even more than I desire his mind and his body?" Sarek turned away from Spock's startled expression. "But if you will not honor him with the truth of your own love, I will take him as my own. I will show him another way to be happy."

"I cannot." Spock stared down at the floor. "A Vulcan does not . . . " Spock shook his head. "I do not understand. What you have done goes against all Vulcan teachings. The seven-year cycle. The control of emotions. You have ignored all of these in your lust for James Kirk's body."

"Lust?" Sarek did not bother to control the faint smile that twitched at the corner of his mouth, remembering the pleasure of taking Kirk's body, but also remembering the pleasure of his company at dinner and at the negotiation table. "Perhaps I should be insulted, but I will forgive you for your error. You left Vulcan before your education was complete.

"Spock, public suppression of emotion is desirable, but to express emotion for one's bondmate in private is a necessary outlet. Frequent sexual contact is desirable to increase the bonding energy. Also, when the body knows the other, the danger of plak tow is lessened during the Time."

"A male bondmate cannot--"

"Spock, I am not interested in your excuses. I wish to know what you will do about the situation." He said it quickly, and Spock reacted as though the words were a fist to his stomach.

Spock nearly crumpled on the couch, his breathing labored. "You cannot expect me to go to him and ask him to accept me. He has been your lover."

"Do you consider him damaged merchandise?"

"No." Spock's head came up sharply. "No more so than when he bedded . . . countless others." Spock swallowed again. "Does it not matter to you that he has been sexually active with numerous partners?"

"More excuses." Sarek crossed his arms on his chest. "Choose now, Spock."

Spock closed his eyes and compressed his lips. When he opened his eyes again, new resolve shone in them. "My gratitude, father."

As he walked out the door, Sarek nodded his satisfaction. It would be a long time before he found another lover with James' fine qualities, but it was well that Spock had found the courage to claim his t'hy'la.

//////////

Sarek stood up when Kirk led Spock into his quarters. They had come directly from their duty shift, so they were both in uniform. Kirk wore a short-sleeve, white tunic that emphasized his muscular arms and strong chest, but the ember of Sarek's desire had cooled.

"How was your day, Sarek?" Kirk took the seat beside him and briefly rested his hand on his arm. Last night that hand had rested in his own before Sarek had kissed him. Last night Sarek had desired him. But tonight, Sarek's nerve endings did not fire when that hand touched him.

Sarek tilted an eyebrow at Spock. Why was his son's betrothed bondmate not touching Spock instead? When Spock gave no sign that anything was out of the ordinary, Sarek turned to Kirk with a neutral expression. "My day was productive. I received several dispatches to which I have responded."

"Yes, Uhura was about to blow a gasket at all the communications traffic," Kirk said with a smile.

"No doubt, she will not be the only who feels relief when the Vulcan ambassador has left the Enterprise," Sarek said.

Kirk's smile widened. "In the past, I haven't particularly enjoyed having ambassadors aboard. This is a new experience for me."

Sarek looked away from that smile. "I am pleased that you have both chosen to join me for dinner," Sarek said smoothly.

Over dinner, they spoke of inconsequential matters. Sarek and Kirk discussed the negotiations with the Vancerilians. Kirk and Spock spoke of the Enterprise's next mission. Sarek talked of his own future missions.

After dinner, Sarek produced a bottle of scotch. "James, you will have one, I am sure. And you, Spock?"

"Thank you, Sarek," Kirk said warmly.

"Yes, Ambassador. I will." Spock's tone was cool.

The ensuing silence could not be described as a comfortable before Kirk leaned forward and said, "We do have to talk, Spock. I'm afraid that your father and I haven't been completely honest with you."

At almost the same time, Spock said, "Captain . . . Jim, my father has forbidden my betrothal to T'Engano."

Kirk's eyes went to Spock and then to Sarek. "What? Why would you do that, Sarek?" He put down his drink, and then picked it up again. "Um, we can talk about that, but first I think that Sarek and I--"

"Because he knows . . . " Spock held his own drink in front of him, looking at Kirk intently. "He knows that it is not the most logical choice."

Kirk stared at his first officer. "Oh." He took a sip of his drink before he glanced at Sarek with a puzzled look.

Sarek put down his own drink with an audible clunk. Spock had not yet spoken to Kirk. He was planning to tell him about their discussion now. Sarek could not imagine how Kirk would react, but he doubted that it would be pleasant.

"My father told me of his desire to take you as his bondmate. After some discussion, we concluded that the logical course would be for you to become my bondmate instead."

Kirk nearly choked on his drink before his eyes shifted to Sarek. He blinked and turned back to Spock. "Logical?" Kirk sputtered, his face rapidly flushing. He half-stood up but reseated himself, taking an angry sip of his drink.

Spock nodded and steepled his hands in front of him with the air of a science officer giving a report to his captain. "Yes, Captain. As my bondmate, it would be possible to continue your duties aboard the Enterprise. If you were to stay with my father, he would expect you to resign and--"

"Yes, Sarek and I did talk about "that*" Kirk bit off the words fiercely. "What else?"

Spock raised an eyebrow at Kirk's tone, glancing quickly at his Sarek, before he continued. "Also, you and I already share the beginnings of a bond. Breaking that bond is not only inconvenient but could actually pose some danger to us."

"Anything else?" Kirk's voice lowered, and his face lost all expression.

Spock's eyebrow climbed again. "Are these arguments not sufficiently compelling?"

"Damn you, Spock!" Kirk jumped to his feet so quickly that his chair fell over. He glanced down into his half-full glass before he threw the drink into Spock's face, eliciting a surprised exclamation from his first officer and a look of incredulity from Sarek. "How dare you?" Kirk growled at both of them. "Do you think I'm property to be passed from father to son for whatever 'logical' reasons you can dream up?"

He slammed the empty glass down on the table, sparing a glance for Sarek. "Forgive me, Ambassador. I must go. We may not have an opportunity to meet before you disembark at Vulcan, so I'll tell you now that it was a pleasure to work with you." His tone of voice contradicted his gracious words.

Sarek stood up saying, "I enjoyed our time together as well, Admiral," as Kirk turned and stalked out.

"I do not understand." Spock applied his napkin to his wet face and looked down at his scotch-soaked uniform tunic. "Jim has always been a logical man. In addition, I believe that he desires me. Why did he react with anger to my recommendation?"

"My son is a fool." Sarek sank down in his chair glaring at his son. "Have you so little knowledge of what is proper that you are unaware that such matters should be discussed privately?"

Spock rose to his feet, grabbing at the table to support himself. "Can it be that he no longer cares for me?" He swallowed. "You spoke of ensuring his happiness. I have no experience. I do not know what to do."

Gazing at Kirk's abandoned glass, Sarek said, "Spock, do you love him?"

Squaring his shoulders, Spock said, "I . . . I cannot discuss that with you."

"Perhaps you should leave as well." Sarek began to pick up the clutter left from dinner, feeling Spock's eyes on him. After a long silence, he said, "My son, I have not always been a good father; however, I hope you will now accept my advice. Do not be foolish enough to lose him. Go to him and tell him that you love him."

Spock stood very still behind him. "You have lied to me, Sarek,"

"Specify." Sarek sat down heavily but did not look at his son.

"You do not desire him." Spock swallowed. "If you did, you would not be so altruistic as to give him back to me. No Vulcan would." He cleared his throat. "I saw your desire for him when you first came aboard, but it is gone. I do not understand. Why did you ask him to bond with you?"

"I did not."

Spock's hand shot out to grasp Sarek's arm to pull him to his feet and spin him around. Sarek grunted in pain and surprise as he stared into Spock's angry eyes. "Explain," Spock said in a voice that was nearly a growl.

Sarek looked pointedly at Spock's hand on his arm, but the grip did not loosen. With a sigh, he looked back up. "I will give you the truth. I took him because I needed him. It was my Time, and I found him desirable. Far more desirable than a hired companion. But he came to my bed willingly. I did not coerce him." He compressed his lips. "You have only yourself to blame. If you had not been so foolish as to agree to marry another, I doubt that he would have been open to my seduction. Despite the fact that you rejected him, he loved you still."

"Loved?" Spock's voice was a whisper and his eyes were haunted.

"Loves," Sarek corrected himself. He shook off Spock's hand. "My desire cooled only this morning. My Time is passed."

"He does not know," Spock murmured.

"I will always be grateful to him." Sarek turned away. "It is, of course, not the first time that he has saved my life."

"But you do not love him. What if he had accepted?" Spock's voice was calm, but Sarek heard the touch of madness there.

"In my desire for him, I did ask him to stay with me. But I did not ask him to be my bondmate. I am . . . grateful that I had that much control." He paused, but when Spock said nothing, he continued, "If he had been willing to stay with me, I would have married him. He would never have known that I did not--"

"Did not desire him? Would your body have allowed you to keep up such pretense?"

Sarek waved an impatient hand. "The desire will return shortly. It is part of the normal cycle. Rather I referred to the fact that I am not in love him. I respect him a great deal, and I find him a pleasing companion, but I do not love him as you do. You are t'hy'la."

"You used him." Spock's voice was a whisper. He clenched his fists and stared at the opposite bulkhead. "If you had touched his mind, I would break your neck."

Sarek lifted an eyebrow. "Yes, that is as it should be."

Spock's head came up. "He did not know that you were in your Time? He . . . he took pleasure from your touch." He gripped his hands behind his back. "How can that be so in the madness of your Time?"

Sarek gripped his hands in the sleeves of his robe. "Perhaps my desire would be considered madness by a Vulcan who abhorred passion. To a passionate Terran such as James Kirk, my desire was welcome." He tilted his head, watching his son's reaction, and understood suddenly what Spock feared.

"When you went to T'Pring, you were late in your cycle. You had delayed too long. You entered plak tow. It is not a necessary part of pon farr. If you take him as your bondmate, during your Time, you will require a great deal of sexual contact followed by a short period when the desire will wane as mine has now. During the remainder of your cycle, your desire will be manageable."

"I did not know." Spock turned away.

"And your fear of hurting him kept you away?" Sarek sighed. "Your Time is approaching again. Do not delay. Take him soon." He sank into his chair and did not look at his son. "Or marry T'Engano . . . " Sarek paused, then looked up at Spock with a challenge in his eyes. " . . . and I will comfort James as I have this past week."

"Perhaps I should be grateful to you for showing me my error." Although Spock's words were conciliatory, his tone was not.

Sarek studied his son's stiff back. "Perhaps you will be when you have forgiven me for laying my hands on him."

"You put more than your hands on him," Spock murmured without emotion in his voice.

His head came up, and he wondered if it was in Spock's mind to extract revenge on the one who had 'violated' his t'hy'la. What form would that revenge take? "You pledged yourself to another, Spock, and you dare to suggest that what we did was wrong? Do you now intend to tell him about my motivations?" Sarek asked quietly.

"And hurt him needlessly?" Spock shook his head. "He has already been hurt enough. I will take my leave of you, father. Tomorrow you will disembark at Vulcan."

"It is a human superstition, but I wish you luck," Sarek said to Spock's retreating back, but he received no response.

********************

Communications Officer Uhura notified Sarek when they established standard orbit around Vulcan. He acknowledged her and reached to cut the circuit, but hesitated. "Commander Uhura, is the captain on the bridge?"

Her voice lowered. "No, sir. He was here earlier, but he left as soon as we established orbit. He asked Mr. Spock to see you off, Ambassador."

"Where is the captain?"

"Ambassador." She hesitated. "Sir, I can't tell you that, but . . . he has been known to visit the Observation Deck on occasion."

"Thank you, Commander," he said, forgetting that gratitude is not logical.

He glanced at his travel bag. He would carry it with him. An extra trip back to the VIP quarters would only annoy the starship officers who were waiting for him to disembark.

It was shortly after the end of the alpha shift, and the corridors were crowded. When he arrived at the Observation Lounge, he expected the privacy lock to be set, but the door opened at his touch. He keyed the lock behind him, placed his bag on the floor and stopped.

Kirk was standing by the viewing port staring out at Vulcan, but he was not alone. Spock stood beside him, his hands gripped behind his back.

Leaving was the only logical choice. Sarek stayed.

"You will not say good-bye to the ambassador?" Spock's voice was quiet.

"I gave you an order, First Officer. Surely, you can handle that assignment," Kirk snapped without turning.

"You are correct to be angry with me." Spock took a deep breath. "I was wrong last night. If you care for him . . . " Spock's voice choked, and he swiped a shaking hand across his face.

"Spock?" Kirk turned, alarm on his face. "You can't think that I . . ." His hands gripped Spock's shoulders, and his brilliant eyes glittered.

"If you love him, I will not interfere." But Spock did not shrug off Kirk's hands. "I also desire your happiness more than I desire . . ." His eyes devoured Kirk's face.

"Desire, Spock? What do you desire?" Kirk searched Spock's face as he whispered the question.

Their faces were only centimeters apart. It was no effort for Spock to lean down to kiss Kirk's mouth. It was a light, swift kiss, and when Spock lifted his face away, Kirk's eyes remained closed. "You, Jim. I desire you. I have been a fool. But I love you. With all my mind and my body and my soul."

"Damn." Kirk twisted away to grip the railing.

Spock straightened. "Must I leave you now? Do you not want me? You did not want me last night. You asked me to leave your quarters." v "I was angry last night," Kirk said softly, his eyes were still shut. "What I said . . . about you and Sarek fighting over me and you drawing the short straw . . . it wasn't fair." With a sharp exhalation, he turned to stare at Spock. "You just said that I should go to Sarek." He rubbed a hand across his jaw. "Funny. Last night, I thought that you both wanted me. Now you've both come to your senses. You're right, of course. Wanting me would be illogical. I think that I'm more angry with myself than I am with either of you."

Spock reached out to touch Kirk's cheek and trailed his fingers down to lift his chin. Sarek clenched his fists. He could almost feel the coolness of that skin. It was far too soon for desire to be returning.

"I *want* you to be happy, Jim. I do desire you, but I desire your happiness even more than I desire your beautiful mind and your tempting body."

"Oh, Spock." Kirk's hands went to Spock's waist, and he pulled him close. This time their kiss lasted for several minutes. When they drew apart, Kirk's eyes were shining. "That's the most perfect declaration of love that I've ever heard."

Sarek nearly laughed. At least, his son had used one piece of knowledge that he had gained from his father. Again, he thought of leaving, but he was afraid that his movement would reveal his presence. He did not wish to disturb them.

"You know that I love you, too, Spock." Kirk's hands cradled Spock's face. "My happiness is with you. Always."

"Jim, I recall when you tried to tell me that before. And I would not listen." Spock closed his eyes. "It is a harsh realization that it was necessary for you to become my father's lover before I could see the truth."

Kirk's hands dropped away, and he took a step backward. "Damn," he whispered. "You don't think that . . ." He turned away. "Maybe I am guilty of that. Of using Sarek to make you notice me." Shaking his head, Kirk said, "I don't know what I was thinking. But when you told me about your betrothal, all of my hopes died." He ran a shaking hand across his brow. "I was attracted to Sarek, and I didn't think too much about what I was doing."

Spock's eyes opened, and he lifted an eyebrow. "You were not entirely responsible for your actions. He seduced you; a Vulcan who is determined to take a partner can be difficult to resist."

Kirk's eyes widened. "I'm no blushing virgin. He wanted me, and I wanted him." He frowned. "But it wasn't like with you. Sarek never asked for a meld. We almost . . . and we both held back."

"That is well," Spock said, frowning as well. "If he had taken your mind, I would have broken his neck." He put a hand out to touch Kirk's face, and his expression became gentle. "Your mind belongs to me. And now will you pledge me your body as well?"

"You forgive me, Spock?" Kirk put his hand over Spock's to clasp it and turned his head to kiss the palm. "Can you bear to touch me after . . . after what I've done?"

"I can, and I wish very much to do so," Spock said. "We will put this incident behind us." Gripping both of Kirk's hands, Spock sank to his knees.

"Jim, I love you. Will you be my bondmate? Will you choose me before all Vulcan?"

Kirk stared down at Spock, a small smile playing on his face. "We already have a bond. What else do we need?"

A shy smile lit Spock's face, a smile that Sarek remembered seeing when his son was a small boy, a smile that spoke of secrets to be shared. "Jim, there is so much more in a full bond. I am most eager to show you."

Kirk pulled Spock's head to rest against his stomach. "Oh, I have a few things that I would like to show you, my friend."

"This, for a start?" Spock murmured. He lifted his head, and raised his hand to trace the outline of Kirk's erection. He looked up, a question in his eyes.

"Yes, Spock," Kirk whispered.

"I believe," Spock said as he stroked his fingers along the opening of Kirk's trousers, "I have an old debt to repay."

"Oh, yes, Spock." Kirk backed up to grip the rail. "Touch me. Please touch me."

Rooted to the spot, Sarek closed his eyes, remembering the musky taste and texture of Kirk. Kirk's soft sounds of pleasure took him back to twenty-nine point three hours ago when his tongue had been on that sensitive flesh. He opened his eyes thirty seconds later at Kirk's orgasmic cry.

Kirk slid to his knees and embraced Spock. Sarek could not see Spock's face, but he could see Kirk's, and a jolt of pain tore through him when he saw the radiance on Kirk's face.

"T'hy'la," Kirk said.

Sarek turned and walked out the door.



- finis -