Title: Just Fine

Author: Caroline Crane

Pairing: Trip/Reed (so much for my big plans to be a Trip/Archer shipper)

Type: slash M/M

Archive: just ask so I know where it's going

Feedback Address: caroline_crane@hotmail.com

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Trip checks on Malcolm after the events of "Breaking the Ice"

Disclaimer: Not mine, but I'd pay Dominic for a few hours of his time ; )

Author's Notes: Sappiness alert. I needed to cheer myself up so I wrote a little romance, and it's hokey so there's your fair warning. After this I am swearing off obsessing about a 30-second exchange of dialogue in "Breaking the Ice". I promise.

JUST FINE

By Caroline Crane

****

Trip smiled at the sound of the voice on the other side of the door calling out for him to enter. He let out a deep breath and told his stomach to calm down, running one hand over his face to compose himself before he straightened his uniform and stepped into the quarters. There was no reason to be nervous, everything was fine. He'd told himself that at least forty times since they'd gotten Lieutenant Reed and Ensign Mayweather safely back from the comet's surface, and for hours after their return he'd managed to stay away. He didn't go down to sick bay to check on either of them, and he chose not to sit in when Captain Archer reprimanded the two of them for fooling around when they were supposed to be collecting samples from the comet.

He knew he would have taken their side anyway, so he'd opted to make himself scarce rather than raise Jon's suspicions or start a fight with his best friend in front of the other two officers. So for hours he'd managed to lose himself in Engineering, running diagnostics and fixing things that weren't broken. But even though he'd kept his hands busy, his mind had been on one thing the entire time. He was just fine, Trip told himself over and over the whole time he was alone in Engineering. They'd both made it back to the ship and they were fine. There was no reason to go and see for himself, none at all. More to the point, he had no excuse to go and see for himself, and even as he found himself standing in quarters that weren't his own he knew he had no idea how to explain his presence.

"Commander?"

Malcolm's voice cut through Trip's thought process and straight to his heart, making Trip blink and take a step backwards in surprise. When exactly did he manage to start having feelings for the man standing in front of him? Before they boarded Enterprise they barely even knew one another, and although Trip had always found the Lieutenant attractive he hadn't planned on falling in love with him. But there it was again when he looked up and met the other man's dark, questioning eyes - that tug at his heart that told him unmistakably that he was in way over his head.

"Evening, Lieutenant," he said as casually as he could manage. "Heard the captain raked you and Travis over the coals when you got back, just thought I'd stop by and see how you were doing."

Trip was gratified to see the barest hint of a smile turning up the corners of Malcolm's lips for a moment before the other man reigned in control of his emotions again. "It was certainly well-deserved, Commander. As Ensign Mayweather's superior I should have set a better example."

A low chuckle escaped Trip's throat as he tore his gaze away from Malcolm's and let his eyes wander over the other man's quarters. There were barely any touches of Malcolm's personality in the room, but that didn't surprise Trip. He'd never met anyone quite as guarded as Malcolm.well, no humans, anyway. Still, there were times when the Lieutenant's professional façade slipped just a little, and Trip had a feeling that if he could just melt that outer shell he'd find a warm, passionate man hiding somewhere inside. He hadn't bothered to hide his amusement as he watched Travis and Malcolm working on their snow Vulcan, although he couldn't deny that he felt a twinge of jealousy that it was Travis and not him on the receiving end of that smile.

"The Captain was just a little uptight about the Vulcans, Malcolm. Don't take it too personally, everybody deserves to have a little fun now and then. Why else are we out here, right?" He turned back to the other man in time to watch one of Malcolm's eyebrows raise in question. "Anyway, you're both back safe and sound and the mission was a success. How's Travis' leg?"

"Dr. Phlox assured me that he'll be fine in a day or two," Malcolm answered, his hands still clasped behind his back as he watched Trip wander around his quarters. "It was just a mild strain."

"Good, that's good news," Trip answered distractedly. He stopped pacing and clasped one hand behind his neck, staring at the wall in front of him for a moment before turning back to look at the other man. "And you're alright? I mean, that had to be a little nerve-wracking, being stuck inside a comet."

Malcolm nodded and finally unclasped his hands, letting them fall to his sides as he began to relax just a little. "The doctor performed scans on both myself and Ensign Mayweather, Commander. I assure you I'm quite alright."

Trip stifled a sigh and told himself that he'd gotten what he came here for. Malcolm was fine, he was standing right there in the flesh telling Trip from his own mouth that he was fine. He forced what he hoped passed for a casual grin and took a few steps backwards toward the door. "Well I'll let you get some rest, Lieutenant. Been a long day for everyone."

"Sir."

Trip was almost at the door before he heard Malcolm's voice again, making his heart skip a beat and his palms start to sweat. He rolled his eyes at himself and told himself to get it together before he made a total fool of himself. He was the First Officer, he had every reason to check on the well-being of crew members that had just been through a traumatic experience. There was no reason to be acting like a nervous teenager at his first school dance. Finally he took a deep breath and turned around, forcing himself to meet Malcolm's steady, unreadable gaze again.

"I understand that I have you to thank for saving my life."

"That was the Vulcans, Malcolm, not me. I mean I tried to pull you guys out but."

Malcolm shook his head and took a step forward. "I spoke to Ensign Hoshi in the mess hall, Commander. She informed me of your efforts to convince the captain to allow the Vulcans to assist us."

Trip opened his mouth and then closed it again without saying anything, his mind racing as he considered the ramifications of what Malcolm had just said. First there was the fact that Hoshi has repeated events that happened on the Bridge to another officer, then there was the crew's opinion of the captain's behavior. Trip understood why Jon had resisted accepting help from Vanik, but not everyone on board knew his best friend's history with the Vulcans and their treatment of humans. "Look, Malcolm, Captain Archer."

"No explanation necessary, Sir," Malcolm said, raising his hand as if dismissing the idea. "I merely wished to convey my gratitude."

"Don't mention it," Trip murmured, his arms crossed over his chest as he watched the other man. For just a moment...but no, he had to have imagined it. It was polite gratitude for having a hand in saving Malcolm's life, that was all. He only thought he saw a flicker of something else in the other man's eyes because he wanted it so much. Only the longer he held the Lieutenant's gaze the more he started to think that he hadn't imagined anything at all. He was still wearing the same expression Trip had gotten so used to, still standing more or less at attention, but there was something almost like nervous tension creeping into his expression. Trip lowered his voice and took a few steps back into the room. "Are you sure you're okay, Lieutenant? I mean if it were me I think I'd be a little shaken up."

"Starfleet trained us for these situations, Sir," Malcolm answered, his voice wavering only slightly as Trip stopped just in front of him. "I assure you I'm perfectly fine."

"Did Starfleet also train you to interrupt a superior officer?" Trip asked, not bothering to hide the amusement lighting up his features. He was standing close enough to the other man to feel the tension radiating off him now, looking right into those dark, guarded eyes that held the answers to all the questions Trip had yet to ask.

"Sir?"

"You've interrupted me twice since I got here, Malcolm. Considering how careful you usually are to abide by the letter of every regulation I'm guessing that means there's something on your mind."

Instantly Malcolm's expression shifted back to blank compliance and his spine stiffened, his arms clasping behind his back as he did his best to ignore the Commander's proximity. "I apologize, Commander. There's no excuse."

"Well I wouldn't mind so much if you were out of uniform," Trip said, his grin growing a little as he watched Malcolm's throat move in an involuntary swallow. The other man glanced down at Trip's uniform unconsciously before he caught himself and forced his eyes back up to the Commander's.

"I'm afraid I don't follow you, Commander."

Trip laughed quietly and reached out with one strong hand, letting it trail across the shoulder of Malcolm's uniform to brush his fingers across the other man's collar. He smiled at the sharp intake of breath and the shiver he could feel roll through Malcolm's body before he looked back up again. "Your uniform, Lieutenant. I was just wondering if you're always so strict about regulations or if it's just the uniform."

"I.I'm afraid I couldn't say, Sir," Malcolm breathed, his eyelids sliding shut for just a moment before he opened them again and met Trip's gaze. "As far as I know I'm always myself."

"Good answer," Trip said, leaning even closer as his fingers left Malcolm's collar to trace the outline of his jaw. "You know you and Travis nearly gave me a heart attack today, almost getting yourselves killed like that."

Malcolm's eyebrows raised almost imperceptibly as he stared back at Trip, the hint of a smile finally creeping into his features. "I apologize if Ensign Mayweather and I caused you any concern, Commander. The circumstances were unfortunately out of our control."

"I'm your senior officer, Malcolm, it's my job to worry," Trip answered, but his smile faded as he remembered standing on the Bridge, his heart in his throat as he wondered if he'd ever see either of them again. Not being able to pull them out of the comet had been the worst moment of his life.

He felt a hand close over his and realized for the first time that he was still cupping Malcolm's cheek, then warm fingers entwined with his and pulled his hand away from the other man's face. "We're both fine, Sir," Malcolm whispered, "thanks to you."

Trip shook his head and looked down at their entwined hands, disbelief mingling with remembered fear and making his throat constrict. He hadn't gone to Malcolm's quarters with the intention of coming on to him, he hadn't gone there to do anything other than see for himself that Malcolm was okay. He definitely didn't expect to find himself standing this close to the Lieutenant, their fingers entwined and Malcolm's breath warming his neck. He looked up again and took a deep breath. "No.not thanks to me. I tried to save you, but I couldn't do it. If it hadn't been for the Vulcans."

Malcolm's fingers closed a little tighter around the Commander's as he took a calculated risk and slid his other hand behind the taller man's neck. Trip barely had time to register the fact that he was being pulled forward before Malcolm's lips connected with his own, soft heat moving against his mouth and sending a shiver straight down his spine. His free hand caught Malcolm's waist and trapped the other man against him, his lips parting under the gentle urging of the Lieutenant's tongue. Even as he felt Malcolm's fingers moving off his neck to trail through his hair he wasn't sure if this was really happening or if he was dreaming again. Then again, his dreams never felt quite this vivid, and they didn't carry with them the vague scent of warm metal or the unmistakable taste of mint tea.

He registered the sound of a low groan but he couldn't tell if it came from his own throat or Malcolm's. All he could focus on was the feeling of the Lieutenant's body pressed against his, heat and energy radiating off Malcolm's skin and reassuring Trip that he was most definitely alive and well. Finally Trip tore his lips away from the other man's, pulling his hand out of Malcolm's to run his thumb across the Lieutenant's kiss-swollen lips. He followed the trail of his thumb with his eyes before looking back up and meeting Malcolm's gaze, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. "I believe that's the third time you've interrupted me since I got here, Lieutenant."

A mischievous smile lit up Malcolm's features as he slid his hands down to Trip's waistband and began tugging his uniform shirt up. "I believe I can rectify that situation, Sir."

Trip's grin grew a little broader as he reached for his shirt and yanked it over his head. He dropped it on the floor behind him and reached for Malcolm's uniform, taking his time and letting his eyes wander as he began to undress the other man. Once their shirts and undershirts were in a pile on the floor he took hold of Malcolm's waist and began backing him toward the bed, his smile fading as their gazes locked again. He stopped when they reached the edge of the bed and leaned forward, capturing Malcolm's mouth with his own again. "I'm glad you're alright, Malcolm," he whispered once they broke apart again.

"I'm fine now, Trip," Malcolm answered, his eyes lighting up in a reassuring grin. "Just fine."

Desiderium Caritas
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