Making a Choice

Author: Xantissa

e-mail: xantissa@wp.pl

Feedback: Please, pretty, pretty pleeeeeeeeeeeease!

Fandom: X-men

Pairing: Logan (Wolverine)/Remy LeBeau (Gambit)

Rating: Strong NC-17

Archive: You like it? You take it! Just let me know (so I can swell with pride!)

Disclaimer: Not mine so don't sue me

Warnings: graphic m/m sex. Alternate Universe. Consensus may be an issue.

Summary: Logan and Remy are sent on a mission together. Things happen, and Gambits past catches up with him.


Making a Choice
by Xantissa


"The past is a ghost
that haunts you
from the moment it exists
until you don't"


Logan slammed the door behind him with such force that Gambit was seriously worried about its well being.

They had just come back from the mission. They were supposed to find Sinister's new base and search it. Something in Sinister's movements had seriously worried the Professor and he sent them to find out just what exactly Sinister planned.

Everything went smoothly – too smooth for Gambit's liking. And of course when he thought that everything would be fine, a bomb was thrown right into his arms.

Logan found Sever.

Flashback

Logan was standing in front of a large tank filled with green, bubbly water.

"We must get her out of there!" Said Logan, staring at a naked, young woman floating inside. Long white, straight hair surrounded her deceptively gentle, beautiful face. She looked like an 18 year old, just like she had six years ago.

"Non!" Gambit cried out, seeing that Logan had released his claws "Don't do it!"

Shocked, Logan turned around to stare at the younger man.

"What?! Are you completely nuts, Cajun?"

One of the reasons that Logan wanted to get her out of that tank was that it looked very like the one in which he was kept when the adamantium was inserted into his body. Something told him that she was also experimented on. And finding her in Sinister's lab only assured him.

Gambit had to think fast. He didn't want to tell Logan about her, about everything she was capable of and what he had to do with her. Maybe Logan didn't condemn him for the Massacre and Maraudes, but there was always that line. Remy felt that sharing one of the last of his secrets with Logan, would cost him the last of his friends.

"She may be one of Sinister's clones! She could kill us." It wasn't exactly a lie. She would have probably killed Logan, his healing factor or not and what she would ahve done to Remy… well that was another story. He just forgot about one thing – Logan could smell his lie.

" Yer lying thief." said Logan turning back to the tank and raising his clawed hand.

" No! Don't do it Logan! Please… it is dangerous."

The kid wasn't lying this time and Logan hesitated for a moment but decided that he wouldn't be able to look himself in the eye if he left that girl.

"I am not going to listen to ya kid, so ya betta move yer ass over here and help me…"

"Sorry Logan… but Gambit can't allow you dis." Said Remy in a strange voice and charged one of his cards.

Before Logan had the chance to even blink, the card exploded and all the alarms in the lab went off.

"You fucking…"

Logan didn't have the chance to end his colorful curse because a second explosion interrupted him. This time it wasn't Remy.


Flashback.

Now they were back in the house they were hiding in and Logan wanted answers. He wanted them now!

Remy looked at him with a mixture of sorrow and fear. Although it was almost six months since he returned from Antarctica, the x-men hadn't forgiven him. He lived in his exile in the Boathouse and wondered why the hell he wasn't worth a second chance. Everyone else in the team had done something bad in their past and were forgiven. But not him. He knew what he had done was bad and God knows, he regretted it, but was leaving him in Antarctica to slowly freeze to death a fair punishment? Had the X-Men really the right to judge him? To sentence him to death? He was one of them! Or he just thought he was…

Logan hadn't taken part in that, he was in Japan. And when he returned, Logan treated him like nothing had changed. They went to Harry's Hideaway, played pool and done their thing. Now, he would probably loose what little was left from his *family*.

"Now Gumbo, you better tell me what that was all about, and make it quick!"

"Remy is sorry, mes amis, but Remy can't tell you dis."

"Listen here…" Logan's hazel eyes narrowed in barely controlled rage and rippled the muscles of his powerful arms- tensed as if ready to attack.

"Non… Gambit is sorry, but can't… she… she is not… a human, nor a mutant."

"So who is she?" Asked Logan suspiciously. Remy wasn't telling the whole truth, he could smell his fear and lies. Gambit stepped back and shook his head in silent refusal. He couldn't tell him. No one should know. He survived Antarctica, but if somebody would know about this particular part of Remy's stay with Sinister, he would have to go. And he had had enough of leaving places he learned to love. First New Orleans, now the Mansion…

"Listen up Gumbo, and listen good, `cause it is the first and last time I am asking. Who is she? Ya can do it the easy way or the hard way… choose."

Remy shook his head once more. Before he had even a chance to move or to notice Logan's movement he was on the floor, pinned by a very
heavy, and very pissed off Logan.

"Speak!" Growled Logan low in his throat.

In that moment, Remy understood that he could only fight his way out of it. If Logan started something he would never let go.

He twisted his spine in a way that would break ordinary human and slipped out of Logan's reach.

"Remy don't wanna fight… just don't ask."

"Too late."

Logan lunged forward but Remy dodged the blow. The second also, but Wolverine moved with surprising speed for such a heavy man. The third
blow caught Remy off guard, straight in the temple.

Momentarily he saw stars and then blackness.

Just before he lost consciousness he did something that hadn't happen in years. He charged what he was touching – Logan's shirt.

The explosion could have killed anyone without a healing factor. Its force had thrown him on the wall with sickening thud. Logan went through the whole room to land heavily on the floor.

Seconds later, Remy regained consciousness. His vision was a blur, his head ached terribly. But he managed to understand what happened. His heart froze when he tried to scramble back on his feet. He needed to go check on Logan. "Mon Dieu, don't let him be dead. Don't let me kill my only true friend!" He thought, not realizing that he was crying.

When he managed to stand straight he saw Logan moving. In the same second, he heard low, menacing, growling.

Remy had seen Logan in full berserker mode enough times to understand that things were bad.

In a matter of seconds, Wolverine was on his feet and advancing toward him with scowl on his face.

His eyes were yellow and burning with bloodlust. Claws sprung from his hands with a sharp /snikt/ and skin and hairs on his chest were growing back.

Remy had problems with concentration, but he knew that he was going to die if Logan wouldn't snap out of his berserker mode.

"Logan…" He tried to call to him but the pain in his head was too much to bear. His vision began to blur once more and he understood that there was no way out of it.

Suddenly he remembered Antarctica. The fear when he realized that the X-Men had left him to die, the fear of death that was now overtaking him again. He closed his eyes and wondered idly if death from Logan's, no, Wolverine's claws would be quicker than from freezing?

Suddenly he understood that he didn't want to die! He survived the ice; he wouldn't die in such a stupid way!

Refusing to think about it, he dropped all his mental shields at once. No one knew about his charm power. Usually he didn't use it, because it caused him so much pain but now rape and a possible beating was better that death.

It wasn't first time when he changed his fate with it.

Charm was strictly sexual, and affected anyone, even telepaths because it was based on emotions, not thoughts and their mental shields weren't designed to block emotions.

When the expected blow didn't come, he carefully opened his red on black eyes. Wolverine stood mere inches from him. His face was twisted in angry scowl and yellow, feral eyes were burning holes in his face. His nostrils flared when he was taking in gulps of Remy's scent.

The Wolverine was still growling, but it definitely changed its sound.

However, Gambit never had the time to ponder it. In a matter of seconds, he was grabbed by the shirt and tossed in the direction of the bedroom.

"So Gambit gets no foreplay, eh?" He asked sarcastically, trying in vain to cover his fear.

Feral Logan would almost certainly be into pain and blood and Remy knew that before the sun rose he would be wishing that he was dead. He had to force his body into submission, force himself not to struggle, as it would certainly anger the Wolverine more.

When he was tossed on the bed, he only yelped, surprised by the force. Seconds later he heard the /snikt/ again and froze. There were no restraints on earth that would keep him more still.

Then he felt a slight touch, from his neck, arms down to his lower back and abs.

The cool air on his bare skin told him that Wolverine had literally slashed his clothes.

A shudder of fear ran down his spine. He closed his eyes and tried to distance himself from reality, from the pain. He knew that it would hurt, not only physically, but rape wasn't anything new to him. Eventually, he would get over it. What hurt the most was loosing a friendship. It was his only warm source of feeling.

He was an empath and constantly feeling negative emotions drove him into depression. Logan was his anchor to sanity. Now, even if he survived, it would never be the same. Probably, when Logan regained his sanity, he would be seriously pissed off and probably beat the crap out of him for forcing him to doing such a thing.

His previous experiences told him that "victims" of his Charm often blamed him for forcing them to feel attraction to another man, and made sure that he paid for it.

Rough hands urging him to turn over made him snap out of his dark thoughts straight into an even darker reality. He didn't even realize that he was already naked.

Wolverine stopped suddenly. His mate was lying on his back on the bed, naked. A lean, beautifully shaped body was so invitingly stretched out, but something was wrong.

His auburn hair was loose on the pillow and strange, demon yet sensual eyes were now tightly closed. His chest heaved and body was shaking with shudders. Wolverine could feel his own lust building to white, blazing fire but still… something stopped him. It was only then he understood.

The scent. The scent was wrong. He could feel fear coming in waves from his mate. It felt… wrong.

Wolverine growled softly, making sure his mate heard the difference and bent over the naked boy. Maybe the mate was hurt? Before taking it, he should make sure it didn't hurt.

Remy opened his eyes when feelings coming from Logan changed suddenly. Until now the only thing he felt was raw, animal lust, now however it was… concern?! He sucked in a breath when he realized that Logan, no Wolverine, was sniffing him in search of injuries. He felt a slight stinging in his eyes. Even in this feral state, Logan seemed to worry about him. He let the feeling wash over him, forcing the fear away.

He always felt something for the older man, something more than friendship but never pondered it. Now however, he thought that if it was happening in other circumstances, he would have had nothing against Logan as a lover. Although accepting male lovers had always been hard- "Be honest Gambit." He chided himself. "You never had a male lover in your life, only rapists."

Now he only wished that it wouldn't hurt that bad. He didn't realize that few tears escaped him.

Wolverine could find nothing, no injury on his mate's body and was confused. The fear stopped him, but also aroused him further. Only the human part, somewhere inside him, told him to stop. Told him that something was wrong, not right.

Suddenly Wolverine smelled it… tears. And lapped at it, licking it away from cheeks and eyelashes.

His mate jumped and gave short, surprised yelp.

Remy nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt Logan's tongue touching his eyelids. Warm, wet and soft, it soothed much more than his tears. He opened his shields more, almost completely, to be able to feel Logan's emotions as his own.

Sudden arousal and lust almost took his breath away. He looked on Logan in completely different way. He noticed rippled muscles that were a work of art. Although short, Logan was deliciously built. All hard muscles, biceps and triceps now tight from the strain of keeping him whole, a considerable weight. His skin was dark, heavily tanned and covered with soft, curly hair.

Acting on instinct, he reached out and stroked Logan's chest, wanting to feel all that hair beneath his hands. He felt Wolverine grunt in approval.

Wolverine, scenting no more fear on his mate, stopped restricting himself. The urge to taste, to lick this whole pale, soft skin was too much.

Remy moaned when was covered with the large, warm body. Wolverine's hands seemed to be everywhere on his body. Touching, stroking, petting. And then there was the tongue.

He couldn't stop from shivering when that soft tongue started lapping at him. Like Wolverine wanted to taste, eat all of him.

A sudden bite on his nipple had him arching from the bed, pressing harder into the Wolverine. Feelings of lust, contentment and approval coming from his feral friend completely dominated his. He couldn't think, couldn't speak, only feel. Feel fangs pushing on sensitive the nipple on the verge of breaking skin and warm tongue soothing.

He didn't even notice when Wolverine got rid of his own clothes. Suddenly he felt a hard cock pressing into his thigh and shivered. Logan wasn't terribly long, in that matter he was quite average, but he was terribly thick.

There was no way he could take such a monster. No way. It would probably hurt like… He never had a chance to end that thought when Wolverine, in one smooth motion, took his own aching shaft into his mouth. It wasn't anything like a blowjob. It was more like tasting him. Like Wolverine wanted to taste his whole body.

He didn't even know how close to orgasm he was /or how close to orgasm Logan was, cause it was his emotions he felt/ when a sudden wave of pleasure took him.

With strangled cry, he came with animal ferocity. Trshing on the bed and moaning like a madman. All thoughts fled his mind leaving only an enless sea of pleasure. It seemed for him that it lasted, and lasted… and when he finally opened his eyes, he was completly spent.

He looked at older man's face when he didn't try to avoid the salty liquid. With soft growl, Logan pulled back and caught his hips in strong,
callused hands and flipped him onto his stomach again. Before he could realize what was going on, still riding his orgasm, he felt Wolverine parting his ass cheeks and blowing hot air on his puckered hole. Then he felt something warm and wet. Only after a minute he realized that it was his own cum, and he thanked God for it, because there was no possible way he could take that monster up his ass without some lubrication.

Then something soft, but hard at the same time pushed at his anus and slipped inside – a tongue.

He couldn't stop himself from moaning when it started moving, tonguefucking him. It slipped in and out of him, callused hands stroking his spine and
pushing his legs further apart. Now he felt Wolverine moving to kneel beside him and hands urging him to get on his hands and knees.

Although having just come, the constant lust emanating from Logan aroused him again and he could feel his cock hardening again.

He caught fistfuls of sheets knowing it would hurt. A lot.

Once again he felt Wolverine parting his cheeks and then something that was MUCH bigger than his tongue pressing against his opening! A hot, hard and incredibly thick shaft made him shudder in anticipation of pain. Suddenly Wolverine pushed, but Remy was too tight, to stressed to allow him entry. He almost anticipated Wolverine using more force to push past that guardian ring of muscles in his anus, but he didn't. Instead he leaned over and bit hard on the soft neck of Remy, drawing blood.

Gambit howled in pain/surprise and at that moment Wolverine pushed. His large, painfully hard member sunk into his mate. He couldn't enter fully at his first attempt. So he retreated and pushed once more.

Remy lost his breath. It was almost like being ripped in two. Logan was hard, and incredibly large inside him. But he caused not only pain, pleasure also. His mind was assaulted by emotions from Wolverine. Lust/pleasure/ecstasy… pain, it all melted inside him into one, mind-blowing sensation.

He sobbed as his arms gave up and he collapsed onto the sheets. With this movement large cock slipped out of him nearly to the end, only the swollen, mushroom head stayed inside.

Before he had the time to register what was happening, Wolverine followed him down, and pushed himself in to the hilt.

He cried out once more, almost loosing his mind. The older man grabbed the headboard with one hand, inches above Remy's head and started pumping. Gambit couldn't restrain himself from screaming, crying and moaning with each thrust. In and out. In and out. He couldn't thing about anything but that enormous cock sliding inside him. Suddenly, Wolverine shifted, pressing Remy into the bed with almost his whole weight and then pushed inside hard, deeper than before and his steel hard shaft touched his prostate.

They both howled in ecstasy. Remy completely lost control over his empathy and didn't even know that he started to send his own feelings
into Logan's mind.

Wolverine reached around the slim body in his arms and found his newly hard cock and started fisting it in time with his thrusts. They both came at the same time, screaming and collapsed onto the bed, Logan on his side.

Remy lost consciousness. The feelings, emotions and sensations almost fired his mind. Never in his life had he had such an intense orgasm.

When he regained consciousness few minutes later, he was shocked to find Wolverine pumping his thick cock in him again. It seemed that, despite cumming, Wolverine was still hard. What was even stranger, Remy was still linked to the older man's mind and feeling his lust aroused him again, but his body was too spent to be able to cum once again. After such a mind blowing orgasm his body was weak and completely, utterly relaxed so he just allowed Wolverine to take him, squeezing his internal muscles to milk his cock when he came a second and then a third time.

* * *

"What do you mean the tank is empty?!" Shouted Sinister at one of his guards. Not waiting for an answer he opened a tesseract and disappeared into it. When he appeared in the room, in which Logan had found the young woman in the tank, a strange sight greeted him.

The tank seemed to have been melted from inside. There was no question that Sever must have freed herself. It wasn't like the tank could stop her anyway. But the question was how could she have awakened? She fell asleep six years ago and now, suddenly wakes up and leaves the base? She was a fighting machine with strength far beyond an atom bomb. Created in military labs, then bought and changed by Sinister, she knew nothing about the ordinary world. Only ways of killing and fighting.

"Find me security tapes! Now!"

She shouldn't even want to escape – after all she didn't have a mind of her own. Only a bio-computer. She was an energy converter, so she served as her own energy source. 30% of her body was bio-mechanic. Experimental, completely new technology. She should only react to certain orders. Not make her own decisions. She had no consciousness!

But maybe she did?

First experiments with her went wrong. After her first awakening almost ten years ago, she refused to follow any order.

Then Sinister found that some of her cells were mutating, assimilating with bio-technology.

Four years later she was awakened once more, this time Sinister found something that would force her into action. He suspected she couldn't feel anything so he offered her emotions – from an empath. But that was a mistake also. He wanted a strong reaction and used only the strongest feelings – pain and fear. What he got was much more than he expected. In the effect, only he and three of his people survived. Everyone else was dead in minutes from triggering her action. He was close, very close to being killed himself.

The guard brought back the tapes and switched the monitor. Soon Sinister looked into handsome face of young man he knew all too well.

"Ah… Remy Lebeau, so we meet again…"



Chapter 2

Remy woke up with a terrible headache. A wave of nausea forced him to dash for the bathroom. As soon as he got there, he started emptying the contents of his stomach. While bending over the toilet his mind cleared enough to register few things.

First, he was alone when he woke up.

Second, He was sore.

The events of the previous night came back to him with a force that almost caused him to sink to his knees.

Finding Sever, fighting with Logan and then his desperate attempt to save his life. He forced his best friend to rape him.

He didn't know what felt worse – shame of a victim or loosing his friend. Because after yesterday, there would be nothing between them that could be saved.

His body ached but not only from the… sex?… assault? But also from physical strain. It always was like this.

Although, he did feel the pleasure from sex, he still felt bad. He had problems with defining which emotions were his last night and which belonged to Wolverine. It was a trick that he learned as a child. If he couldn't avoid rape; he linked to the mind of person hurting him and got lost in their feelings. After the fact, he always felt like shit and hurt, but it seemed that it stopped the nightmares. At least some of them…

But he wanted to be honest with himself. Wolverine didn't HURT him like he could have. He didn't want to HURT him. He wanted to fulfill his desire, his lust and he did it. The ones before often wanted to cause him pain.

The dark thoughts were chased away by a sudden flashback. Wolverine bending over him and licking the tears away. Even in such a feral state, he did care. Remy couldn't imagine how he would survive without Logan as a friend.

He would be so lonely…

Another wave of terrible nausea came over him and forced him to throw up again. He broke into a cold sweat and started shaking. Remy suspected that part of it was shock and part a mild concussion.

He had been hit pretty hard last night.

But there was another question he wasn't looking to getting an answer to. How would Logan react? He hadn't seen him yet. What if he did the same thing that others before him had when affected by his charm, when he couldn't control it? What if he got mad and beat him up?

Suddenly, a shadow appeared over him and Remy flinched instinctively. Only then he realized that it was Logan. He was dressed and holding
something in his hands.

Gambit had problems with thinking straight. His head ached badly and his guts were twisting with sudden fear.

Logan nearly fell under the overwhelming stench of fear that came off of the young Cajun curled on the floor in front of the toilet.

His skin was cold, sticky with sweat and grey. The scent got worse when Gambit noticed him. He felt like he had a large, cold hand gripping his stomach when the younger man flinched. Logan gritted his teeth and covered the naked man with blanket that he had brought with him when he heard him puking.

Gambit froze when he felt the warm blanket over his shoulders. Only then did he realize he was completely naked. He didn't dare to move or breath. What would happen next?

Logan felt sick himself watching how scared the Cajun was. Was he really so cruel? Did he hurt him so bad? He desperately wanted to find out if Remy was bleeding, to personally check what kind of damage he caused.

Logan woke up few hours ago. His mind had been blank, only a faint echo of feeling, some images. Just like every time he came back from his berserker mode.

At first, he wasn't worried about it. After all it wasn't something new. But then he realized he was naked and in bed with ANOTHER naked body. This certainly didn't happen often. Then the scent.

Salt of tears, blood and semen. Sweat. The stench of fear that remained on sheets. Then he remembered some images from previous night.

Something exploding in front of his eyes.

Wide, scared red on black eyes

His claws slashing away the Cajun's clothes.

He jumped out of bed and in complete terror, stared at the exhausted, bruised young man in the bed. He had scratches and little bruises – from Logan's fingertips – on his arms and chest and a large, ugly dark bruise on his left temple.

He was asleep but even then the stress was clearly visible on his features. He curled into a fetal position on the farthest end of the bed.

As he watched Remy, he began to understand just what he did. He couldn't believe he had hurt his friend so much.

Why did his beast force him into raping Remy?! Why? He usually became the berserker when somebody threatened him or his family but he never, ever did something like this! He always despised rapists, considered them cowards and lowest form of life, and now he was one himself.

He went out to think, he had to get away from that room, smelling of come and fear, from that still form, that was live proof of his crimes.

But he didn't go far. He couldn't.

The boy was probably wounded, and needed medical attention. He should have checked for injuries himself but… but the truth was, he was afraid to wake him.

He, the big, bad Wolverine was afraid to look into that boy's eyes. Guilt started eating him from inside like angry, mad worm.

He decided to wait until the boy woke up by himself. They still had few hours until the Blackbird was due to get them.

And now he was standing over the trembling, kneeling form and couldn't force himself to say a word. There were no words that could ease the pain that Remy was feeling.

Logan stepped back, wanting to leave the kid more space, hoping it would reassure him a bit.

Remy let out a long, ragged breath that he had been holding too long, not realizing that with his enhanced senses, Logan could easily hear it. He couldn't keep from tensing when Logan came back. His large, heavy form looming over him caused the fear to come back.

"Easy kid." Logan said in a strange voice. "It's ok."

Then he slowly pressed wet towel to the back of his neck. Remy closed his eyes, desperately wanting to believe the older man. He cast a quick glance at the older man's face. Hazel eyes were filled with concern and his face bore lines of stress. He was worried.

"What's wrong?" Asked Logan, hoping that the boy would tell him what injury caused the sickness.

But in his confused state of mind, Remy didn't understand. He had often heard that Wolverine didn't remember what happened during his berserker modes.

Could it be possible that Logan didn't remember?

"Please, Mon Dieu, let it be dat way!" he prayed desperately. He decided to take his chances.

"Gambit is sick. He blew your shirt by accident yesterday and got hit pretty hard." He motioned to his temple hoping it would be close enough to the truth to fool the feral man.

Logan stared at him for a moment, completely confused. Why was the kid lying? From fear? Then Logan realized that Remy thought HE didn't remember last night's events. And he didn't but his senses already told him everything.

Logan wanted to apologize, tell the truth, but he noticed that the stench of fear disappeared.

It seemed that Remy felt better this way. Logan decided to play his game for now. He had to take the kid to the med lab without unnecessary attention. Cyke was supposed to get them out of here in two hours. Logan was ashamed of his actions but didn't give a damn if anybody else knew about it. They couldn't possibly think about him worse than he did.

But the Cajun was another story. Keeping his image was everything that was left to him after The Trial. He decided to leave it to Remy – should he tell somebody about what happened or not.

For now however, he needed to get the boy dressed. When he helped him to get to his feet, his scent hit his nostrils and, to his complete horror, he found it attractive. In a matter of seconds he got hard. Remy was trying to keep the blanket around himself and he didn't notice sudden change in Logan's eyes. They became gold and a low, guttural growl escaped him.

Remy jerked away and Logan snapped out from his lust- hazed state.

"Get dressed kid; we should be at the meeting place in two hours." He barked. Logan was feeling sick himself. He couldn't believe that his body reacted that way to the barely alive kid.

"Yer an animal…a sick old bastard… that what's ya are." He thought while getting as far from the kid as possible.

Remy never knew what happened. Logan's reaction pushed him totally off balance. One minute he was concerned and the next he was angry. Trying not to think about the future, he concentrated on simple actions. First, get himself clean – wash off all the remnants from previous night. Then find a spare set of clothes – because his others were cut into shreds.

* * *

She was conscious. All the time, 24/7, all the hours of the day, every day of the past ten years, she was aware of things around her.

The TLC – special liquid that allowed her to breathe because it was specially filled with oxygen – that filled the tank she was resting in didn't muffle the sounds. Even if it did, her inner sensors scanned the room every two or three seconds.

Normally, nothing disturbed her. But then, she sensed HIM again. After six years, he was near again.

He wasn't alone. This time however, there was no Sinister around.

Neither of them noticed that her eyes opened for a brief moment – enough for her to see both men.

HE was older. He still looked like that young boy back then, but something in his features showed that he had been through a lot of bad things in his life. He wasn't a boy anymore. She activated ADB – Automatic Data Base. Something that was a pat of her built-in computer that became much, much more.

Subject: Logan a.k.a. Wolverine
Status: Mutant
Age: unknown
Powers: healing factor, adamantium skeleton, foot long adamantium claws, 3 in each hand. Extensive combat and tactics training, highly aggressive, unpredictable, prone to berserker mode. Half animal mutant.
Current occupation: member of X-men
Chances of subject being able to defeat Sever?
Processing… 0%

After receiving data from ADB she shifted her gaze to young man behind the short, heavy man. She didn't need to ask ADB about him. She already knew what there was to know.

Flashback

"Why aren't you listening to me?" Asked Sinister, standing in front of the tank in which she was resting. Her eyes were closed but she did hear him. He ordered her to awaken. The system didn't accept the command.

"So we will try it a different way. Harris! Is the cable ready?" He asked, watching cables being dropped into the tank.

"We shall see what your reaction is to some electricity. I know you are listening to me." He said in a flat voice. He was so sure that he could train her.

Using his telepathy on her was useless. She didn't have a mind to target! She was a machine! But the machine lived in human body so she was able to feel pain. Her senses worked well.

"It's ready!" Announced his assistant.

"This liquid will be an excellent conductor for the electricity. Switch it." He ordered.

Even while saying this, he understood that something was wrong. Her eyes snapped open. Large, gold eyes with vertical pupils stared at him without any expression.

The TLC around her boiled and started sparkling as electricity shot out of the cables, but it never touched her. A golden glow was created around her body and in a matter of a heartbeat she was surrounded by pure energy.

For an endless moment in time, everything froze. Energy was flaring and dancing around her lean body and then she closed her eyes again and then all hell broke loose.

Every single device, every cable and piece of equipment in his laboratory started sparkling – like a warning and then it exploded.

That bitch controlled the energy, even being half-drugged.

He watched in awe and terror as the glow started spreading and everything that it encountered just disappeared. His experiment succeeded. She drew energy from everything she encountered – living being or metal. She sucked it until the material disintegrated because the atoms it consisted of, hadn't enough energy to stay joined and simply fell apart on a molecular level.

Nothing could stop her. But he wasn't afraid. He knew that all it took for him to escape was to open the tesseract. So he tried. And then he realized that she could kill him as easily as his assistant that ceased to exist in front of his very eyes. The tesseract needed energy to be created and she controlled it.

As fast as it started, it ended.

When he looked around, all he saw was…the room. An empty room. No body of his assistant, no remnants of his things, there wasn't even smoke!

She had showed him her real power – a power to destroy.


Flashback

That was the first time she was awakened. The second time she saw Remy LeBeau.


Flashback

"Do it." Commanded Sinister to a young – maybe 17 year old boy. He had long auburn hair tied in loose tail but what drew her attention were his eyes. Red on black. Hard and scared at the same time. They expressed too much. She had the ability to recognize emotions, but she couldn't feel them.

"Gambit can't!"

"Do not disobey me LeBeau!"

The boy shivered, but the fear of what may come from releasing his Charm was stronger even than the fear of Sinister.

Sinister wanted him to hit her with his Charm. But to do it, he would have to lower his shield. He had no control of the Charm and probably
every one in the room would be affected by it.

And there were an awful lot of people.

Sinister, two of his assistants and the Marauders; Creed, Arclight, Harpooner, Prism… and others. He fought well, but couldn't possibly fight them all off.

"Gambit is sorry… but… "He couldn't do it! It was too dangerous. And there was the girl in the tank. Sever. That was how he called her. Beautiful in a strange, exotic way.

Pale skin, long white hair, lean body, delicate features, she looked like an angel asleep but she FELT wrong. His empathy was weak because of the shields, but he could read emotions on basic level. To go deeper he would have to drop his shields. And that was not an option because it would release his Charm.

He still could sense her and one thing he knew; he was scared. Every single fiber in his body screamed not to come close to her. Such a dark force. Cold and strange…

Gambit never knew that Sinister didn't want him to use the Charm. He knew that he would refuse. It was just one of his mind games he played. His goal was different. He wanted strong emotions to really move Sever. He figured pain and fear would be the best.

"I think I should teach you a lesson LeBeau." He said darkly and readied psionic attack.

Gambit's shields were impossibly strong, but not for Sinister. He taught him to create them, some he even made himself. With one thought, he crushed younger man's shields.

Remy's scream cut through the air like a hot knife. He caught his head in hands and fell to his knees. The pain was unbearable. He lost his vision for a moment.

His Empathy and Charm went haywire. He didn't notice that others in the room started advancing on him.

When hands started reaching for him, he jerked away and tried to fight his way out of it. Cards flashed and he began to throw.

In panic, he charged them with more energy than normal.

Sinister was confused. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Powerful explosions shook the lab and he had enough. There was no use in prolonging it. He reached out with his mind one more time.

Remy suddenly froze in the middle of charging the card. He was desperate to run but couldn't. Something cold and evil slipped into his unprotected mind and took control over his body. He could do nothing; only watch Sabertooth grin wickedly while approaching him.

"So pretty boy… we are going to have fun, aren't we?" He asked before hitting him in face with a force that threw him onto the far wall. The pain shot through his jaw and straight into his neck.

Others in the room didn't dare to interfere. They just stared with sick fascination at Gambit and Sabertooth throwing him like a ragged doll.

When he was satisfied with the results, he lifted him from the floor by grabbing remnants of his clothes.

"Do it in front of the tank." Said Sinister. He was silently watching events like he would his lab rats.

Creed only snarled, but carried him there and slammed him into the glass wall of the tank.

Sever opened her eyes.

Creed froze for a brief moment. There was something in those beautiful, golden eyes that made him feel… strange, off balance.

She, however, didn't make a move. He wasn't even sure she saw him. Her eyes were as good as dead, without any emotion, or sign of consciousness.

But Sinny wanted him to make a show, so he would. He was ordered to scare and hurt the Cajun as much as possible.

He caught fistfuls of auburn hair and jerked his head upwards. Kneeling on the floor he bent to look into red on black eyes.

Remy's face was already covered in bruises. His eyes were heavily swollen and he could tell that in a half hour he wouldn't even be able to open them. His jaw was probably broken. But even the pain didn't mask the fear in those demon eyes.

"Ya hear me Cajun? I'm gonna fuck ya till ya bleed… and then every one in this room will have a turn with ya. When they finish I will take care of ya again… and again. Ya gonna pray for death before the sun comes up again." He promised, an evil grin spreading across his face and slammed his head once more on the hard floor.

The pain almost made him vomit, but he couldn't do even that. He had no control over his body and was terrified to death. Tears began to run down his face when he heard Creed calling a few of the others to help him. Soon after somebody's hands caught his arms and pinned him to the floor.

Sinister didn't put the genoshian collar on him, because he wanted his empathy to work. He knew that sooner or later he would be too lost in pain, and wouldn't be able to control his empathy. Then he would send his feelings to Sever. And that was his goal, to see her reaction to actually feeling something.

When Sabertooth shred all of the clothes from the young thief, Sinister let go of his mind-control over Remy's body, but still controlled his hands. He didn't want the Cajun blowing his lab.

"Non! Sop dis!" He yelled trying to pull free of the hands still pinning him to the floor.

"Easy boy… I haven't even started yet!" Said Creed chuckling. "I wanna warm you up first."

Then Remy heard the sound of a belt being pulled from his own jeans. Then there was a whistle of air and terrible pain shot up from his sensitive thighs.

He screamed.

He was completely naked, lying on his stomach on the floor, held by number of hands and couldn't possibly avoid the blow. It hurt terribly but he had a sickening feeling that it wasn't everything that Creed was capable of.

And he wasn't mistaken.

"Nice… really nice." He mused watching as an angry red mark formed on pale skin. "But I think I can do betta…"

This time he couldn't even scream. Sabertooth put such a force into the blow that sound of whistling and a loud /crack/ was almost at the same time. The belt hit hard, cutting through the skin of his back like a hot knife. Droplets of blood splashed on the floor and he nearly swallowed his own tongue.

This time he wasn't given any reprieve. Creed hit him a second time, across his buttock. The pain was worse that anything Remy knew. Then another one and another.

Blood covered he floor around him. After the fifteenth hit he couldn't even move. He long ago gave up struggling. His back, ass, sides and thighs were covered in blood and deep cuts. He felt as if his muscles and skin were crushed and everything that was left was a bloody mess – which wasn't far from truth.

There wasn't even a semblance of control over his gifts anymore. It took all his strength only to breathe. He wished that he had fought harder, he wished that he had been killed… not this. Anything but this unending torment, this nightmare that had only just begun.

He could feel lust and sick pleasure emanating from watching him suffer coming from the men surrounding him. And he could feel that large, dark hole that was Sever and that still terrified him most.

"I think ya'r ready boy…" said Creed and fell to his knees behind the young man and forced him on his hands and knees.

"Non!!!!! Please… I beg you, non…" He sobbed helplessly knowing he wouldn't be able to endure this any more. But nothing could help him this time and he felt Creed's cock ramming into him and tearing him apart. Pain that shot into his spine and up made him lose consciousness for a moment. But the pain was so strong, that it caused him to regain consciousness again. He couldn't speak, couldn't breathe, only FEEL every twisted, sick emotion in the room making him insane.

He prayed for death and didn't notice the tears running down his face anymore.

"Oh…" Said some mocking voice. "Little girl is crying? I have something for you. "And his head was jerked up and he saw one of the guards unzipping his trousers to pull out his swollen cock.

That was too much. He started screaming in the only way he was still capable of. Mentally. He heard Creed laughing at him and slamming his cock deeper and with more force into him, not caring about the blood running down his thighs.

He never knew what triggered the second event. In a matter of seconds everything ended.

Sever suddenly left her tank. No one paid attention to her. She was always silent in her tank, never reacting to anything. And suddenly the tank exploded. Cool, thick liquid covered Remy, strangely soothing his tormented back and then the screams began.

She was surrounded by white glow. The first blow was directed at nearest guard. It was so fast that he didn't even notice. Only after, he stood there, watching the hole in his chest through which he could easily see that his heart was ripped in two.

It seemed that wherever she touched her opponent, the flesh just disappeared. Remy lost consciousness soon after her first kill and never saw what happened to the others. She wondered if he remembered what happened next.

An abrupt sound jerked her out of her thoughts. She moved further into the shadows watching Remy LeBeau and Wolverine get into the plane, called the Blackbird according to her ADB.



Chapter 3

He was sitting in the farthest end of the Blackbird and was watching Logan. There was something wrong with that picture.

If the Wolverine hadn't remembered the events of the previous night, why was he keeping his distance? The confusion and anger pouring off of him was clear and not only to an empath. He was tense and avoided eye contact with Remy. It was as if he felt guilty.

But Remy was feeling too sick to ponder it. Right now, the most important thing in his life, was keeping from emptying the contents of his stomach on the jet's floor.

He still didn't know what to think about last night's events. Had Logan really raped him? He wasn't sure. On the one side he hadn't resisted. On the other, he was too scared to do anything. Logan was powerfully built, short but with the arms of a heavy-weight boxer and big, rough hands that could crush man's throat without any problem. Add to that an adamantium reinforced skeleton, plus attitude and anybody would think twice before resisting. And yesterday, Logan was ALREADY feral.

Remy sighed heavily and shifted on the seat, when another wave of nausea came over him.

He felt like shit – not only physically.

Suddenly he missed Jean-Luc.

The gentle hands of his father and warm voice of tante Mattie. They always had the time and patience for him. They loved him… and he lost them too. So many things went wrong in his life. He had lost so much… but still couldn't imagine himself giving up; accepting death. It just wasn't him. Words "what doesn't kill, makes you stronger" aren't just hollow words. It is true.

He survived abuse, betrayal, disappointment, guilt…sometimes he felt old. Having just 23 years, he seemed to have lived three lifetimes already.

Suddenly, he started wondering if Logan felt the same. After all he WAS old.

Scott watched the console of the plane but sometimes caught a glimpse of Logan pretending to watch the skies outside, but really he was watching the Cajun.

Gambit sat in the farthest seat in the aft of the Blackbird, curled into small, shaking bundle of clothes. He looked so vulnerable and young, with that ugly bruise on his temple, that Scott felt a strange stinging inside his chest.

Then, he realized how YOUNG the Cajun really was. His auburn hair lost its' shine long ago and he had lost weight, maybe too much. His face lost that charming smile that he was secretly jealous of. And when had that happened?

Stupid question.

The man that had returned from Antarctica had nothing to do with kid that they had left there. The cockiness that he showed them was only a game, a mask – whereas before it was his way of life. Ever since his return he was careful with the rest of the team. Scott was glad that he found his way back, but failed to show it. It probably was just easier. If he admitted he was happy Gambit had returned, he would have to admit that he failed as team leader. And he wasn't ready to do that.

Although, he admitted to himself, that he felt relief when Gambit decided to move to the boathouse. It was such a simple and easy way for Scott, of solving an inconvenient situation.

Gambit had stopped coming to the Mansion. For the first few months, he hadn't even noticed.

Everything had just settled back into what passed for normal at the Mansion when Logan's comment had destroyed it all.

He couldn't forget that evening.

They were sitting in the rec room, watching some old movie that Jean was crazy about. She and Scott sat snuggled close on the couch and Scott remembered thanking god that there were no emergencies lately. He could finally enjoy his life and Jean. He released a small sigh that no one noticed.

No one except Wolverine, of course.

Logan stood with dark scowl on his face, leaning on the windowsill and watching the night outside. It was completely dark, and rain was pouring heavily, but he seemed to be watching something intently.

"Are yer comfy and warm, Cyke?" He asked not looking away from whatever he was watching.

Taken aback by the sudden question and a strange viciousness in Logan's voice, Scott became cautious. Logan often played on his nerves, teased him, angered him, but they shared mutual respect and a kind of rough friendship after all these years spent working and fighting together. He couldn't remember when Logan's voice had so much venom in it.

"Why are you asking, Logan?" Said Scott, carefully, not wanting to start an argument.

He didn't answer for a very long time. When Scott decided he wouldn't get an answer, he sat back to watch TV, Logan spoke.

"Cause I know a person that isn't so comfy and warm…" The voice changed. Became low and cold. Only those who knew him, knew that such coldness in Logan voice was more deadly than rage.

The whole time, Logan's gaze never left its focus. The Wolverine, seemingly did not notice the strange glares from other X-men, shrugged and left without a word. They heard a distinct click of outer doors and then the sound of a powerful engine roaring to life.

"What was that all about?" Asked Warren, the winged mutant, mockingly.

"And why is he leaving to ride a bike when the weather is so dangerous?" Storm wondered aloud.

"Don't know." Bobby said, averting his gaze. He knew what Logan was talking about. He saw what Logan had been so intently watching. It was nothing new to him. He felt the same. Shame, anger… it was all there. It was the reason why, lately he spent so little time at the mansion.

"Anyway, what was he staring at?" Asked Warren, sarcastically. "At his own reflection?"

Scott, driven by sudden feeling, came over to the spot and looked into the dark – mirror like - window.

The thing he saw, caused a sudden chill to run through his body.

There, at a distance could easily be seen a weak light. It was the Boathouse. The light was the only in the window – a memorial candle.

As a boy, Scott had seen enough of them to recognize that soft, sad fire. But usually they were standing on graves…

It was the first and the last time Logan made any allusion to Remy and The Trial. Foolishly, Scott assumed that if everybody else accepted the situation, so would the Wolverine. But he was mistaken. Again.

Logan came back three days later and acted like nothing had happened. Only their sparring became more brutal, their usual teasing had an edge of venom and that silent, strong trust that Logan had put in him for so long, suddenly disappeared.

Scott realized that he had lost a friend, and didn't know what to do, to change it.

Now, watching the beaten boy and disturbed almost ex-friend, he wondered if he would ever have the chance to make things right. He missed Logan. As hilarious as it sounded, it was the truth.

"What happened Logan?" Scot asked in his most neutral voice. "When I contacted, you said that mission went well. That no one was hurt. Gambit is hurt."

Scott expected a snarl, or a curse. But he got something different.

"It wasn't the mission. The kid and I… we had some problems. We started fighting. Somewhere on the road he charged my shirt – probably just accidentally, cause I hit him too hard. I didn't want to hurt him anyway… but…"

Scott waited. It was unusual for Logan to talk so openly.

"I am afraid he is worse shape than you think. After he charged my shirt, I went feral. Then, I don't remember much." He said finally. What he done while being feral… that wasn't something he wanted to talk about. If the kid decided he wanted to tell somebody, then so be it. He was the one that was hurt. Logan didn't deserve to be spared.

Scott opened his mouth and then closed it. He could tell that there was something that Logan wasn't telling him, but since it wasn't something directly connected to the mission, he shouldn't insist. Logan talked to him. It was awhile, since they sat together and weren't jumping at each other's throats.

Hearing the news, he looked at the kid once more. And suddenly he saw the bruised arms, the way he was curling in the seat… his eyes widened at the realization, what exactly Gambit looked like – like a victim.

Hiding his feelings deep under the mask of self-control, he put on the earphones and contacted Hank.

"MacCoy." Came short, impatient answer. The big, blue, furry scientist was probably working in his lab and couldn't see the world outside.

"Get the infirmary ready."

"Stars and garters! Is somebody wounded?"

"Gambit has… some injuries. I would appreciate if you wouldn't raise the alarm."

There was a long silence, and then a soft answer.

"Of course, Fearless Leader…"

Logan cast him a sideways glance, but kept silent. Somewhere along the way, Gambit fell asleep.

* * *

Sever watched random people come in and out of building that, as her ADB said, was a kind fast food.

Her golden eyes with vertical pupils changed to black. It was night already and her pupils dilated to allow her night vision. She was
interested in people's cars more than anything else, but something inside her, disturbed her. A strange feeling coming from her body stopped her, confused her. It took her some time to realize, according to ADB, that she was… hungry. Her body – until yesterday was kept alive and received nutrition artificially – laked fuel.

Suddenly her sensors detected an incoming person. Moments later she saw a man. He was an ordinary human. There wasn't even a trace of a
threat to her.

She allowed him to come closer. He had brown eyes, very short, black hair and a well-trained body. The muscles looked like those belonging to a person that worked them in a battle, not in the gym.

He was watching her carefully, his warm eyes hiding true feelings.

"Hey there…" He said softly, like he would to a frightened animal.

He saw her white hair from behind, and at first thought she was some older lady, but when he came closer he realized how young she was! And that she was a mutant. Then he noticed she was barefoot, only wearing a long, thin coat. Her naked legs visible from the knee, were extremely pale and delicate. She looked… vulnerable. Probably had some problems. For a mutant with such a visible mutation it wasn't safe to be walking around this town.

Strangely, but when he looked straight into her golden eyes he was not unfazed. They were beautiful. She was beautiful.

"You can't stay here. It is dangerous." He said carefully, not approaching her yet. He didn't want to scare her off.

"Are you lost?"

She cocked her head and just stared at him with unmoving eyes.

He heard footsteps in the adjoining lane and prayed that no one would walk up on them.

"You must be cold… and you certainly can't stay in here. It's a small town and people around here don't like mutants, so it would be better
if you came with me. You mustn't be afraid… I won't hurt you. Just…" He realized that he didn't know what to say to convince her.

Suddenly her stomach growled. She moved slightly, like she was surprised by the sound. She looked down her body with a frown.

"You are hungry. Come… I'll give you something warm… please, trust me." He pleaded.

She looked young, very young. Although she was much more beautiful than Annie, she still reminded him of his daughter. Annie was raped and beaten to death… because she had been a mutant. Such a cruel death for a sixteen year old girl… and her only crime was that she had an incredible touch for plants. Probably her mutant power. She was killed for that and for having green eyes without pupils.

Now, staring at that young, terribly lost young woman he couldn't just walk away.

She eyed him once more, this time with more focus. She must have been wondering…

Sever once more launched the ADB. The bio-computer linked to all her senses took the image of the man in front of her.

Subject: Michael Brady
Status: human
Occupation: 2005-2019 Marines, 2020-2025 Special Tactics Unit, left because of personal reasons.
Family: ex-wife- Marisa Brady - living in New York, New York and daughter Annie 2009-2025.
More information needed?

Sever stopped the ADB. It was all she needed to know. He wasn't linked to Sinister, or to the X-Men. She could go with him. After
all… he had no chances of survival with her.

* * *

Logan was pacing.

Six steps, turn around.
Six steps, turn around.

What was taking the Beast so long?

Six steps, turn around.
Six steps, turn around.

The kid wasn't looking THAT bad when they finally came back home.

Six steps, turn around
Six steps, turn around

He suddenly stopped and remembered how hard it was to force the kid to come down to the infirmary.

* * *

" Non!" He almost yelled. "Gambit won't do it!"

Suddenly, all of his strength returned. The very thought of telling Beast what happened made his breath catch. If Hank knew, he would tell Scott. If Scott knew something so did Jean. And Scott would go to the Professor to tell him. Soon everyone would know.

He felt bad enough. He didn't need everyone's derision thrown in the mix.

He straightened and stepped one step closer to Logan. His red eyes flashed with anger. Its ferocity surprised Logan. He forced Logan to look up, to meet his gaze. He was taller and intended to use all of his tricks.

"Remy tol' you already, dat he just hit himself in de head. Nothing serious. Jus' need some time to sleep it off." When he was angry, his accent became thicker.

"No! Yer will go to see Hank!" Snarled Logan, twisting his face in angry snarl, instinctively assuming an aggressive stance.

Remy noticed this and backed off slightly. He was in no shape to be fighting with Logan again.

"Why are you insisting? What did ol' Gambit ever done to deserve dis kind of affection?"

Logan's facial expression changed from angry to serious.

"I can't leave you alone kid. Not after, what happened yesterday."

Remy sucked a breath in and backed off even more. He almost visibly curled into himself. All of the will to fight left him at once.

"So you lied to Gambit. You said you didn't remember."

"No. I only asked what was wrong, what made ya vomit and shake so badly. But… after that night it was a stupid question. But I really don't remember. Not all of it anyway."

"How…?" This time it was Remy who refused to look Logan in the eye

"When I woke up… I could smell it. Smell myself on your skin, your sweat on mine and still feel your taste. I can't let you go to the Boathouse, not without knowing how bad I hurt you."

There was a long silence. Remy refused to look at Logan, or even to speak to him. He just wanted to disappear, cease to exist.

"We must talk about it… please… Gambit…" Suddenly Logan realized what had he called him. In all the time, when he thought of them as friends, he barely called the Cajun differently than nicknames. Kid, kiddo, boy, Cajun, Gambit, Gumbo… thief… never his real name. – Remy – He said slowly, like he was tasting it.

The boy's head jerked up. He was so surprised that Logan called him by his name, that he forgot about anything else.

In Logan's eyes he found only concern, so he lowered his shields just a little bit, to FEEL Logan. To know his emotion. He needed to know if Logan was honest.

The guilt, anger, confusion flooded his mind witch great force. He quickly put the shields back. No wonder Wolverine was so scary to telepaths. A person that could feel so deep, so strong, probably scared the shit out of them.

Now, he could plainly see that Logan felt incredibly guilty for what he had done and wasn't blaming Remy for it. But… he didn't know about the Charm power. When he learned about it, he would probably change his mind.

He nodded his head. Although Logan was feeling guilty and strangely protective over him, there was no question Logan would drag him into med lab by any means possible.

"Gambit will go."

Again that fucking third person!

"But first he would go change."

Logan wanted to argue but something in hat hypnotizing red eyes stopped him. They looked… vulnerable and tired. His conscience spoke up again telling him to stop! There was no need to push the Cajun further. He had already agreed.

Logan still remembered the strange feeling that came over him, when he watched the lean thief walk away. He caught himself on watching his movement in completely different way. He started noticing how the firm cloth of his trousers stretched and hugged muscular thighs that still managed to be elegant. His whole body was lean, lithe and elegant.

And the way he walked. Like a wild animal – quiet and soft. Logan was sure, that without his enhanced senses, he wouldn't be able to hear him at all.

And sneaking up on people and surprising them in unexpected places was one of his hobbies.

But that was before Antarctica. There was no playfulness in him anymore. He became cautious, bitter young man.

Logan also remembered his body's reaction to catching his scent. Spicy, young and… unmistakably his. In a matter of seconds, he had a rather noticeable hard on and was glad that Remy wanted to change into clean clothes first, and only then to go to the Beast.

"You are a sick, perverted bastard" He thought privately "First you hurt the kid, then you go around lusting after him! Get a grip, for Christ sake!"

After that, he decided to go and seek the Beast out himself. Although he really liked the kid, he didn't trust him to tell the doctor the truth.

The blue, furry genius was sitting behind his littered desk and was massaging the base of his, also blue and furry, nose. His free hand was holding the small glasses and his eyes were closed. However, he was aware of Logan's presence.

His senses were by no means as sensitive as Logan's but still better than that of a non-mutant.

"Greetings Logan. I must admit I am surprised by your visit. I was rather expecting our resident thief."

"I know. He will be here in a few. I have something to tell yer before he comes down."

"And what is it, my friend?"

"Gambit might try to hide some injuries from ya."

Hank raised his eyebrows, waiting for Logan to continue. There was something strange in the smaller man today. He was nervous and even his iron self-control didn't mask it.

"I want you to check him for… other injuries."

"And what kind would of injury am I looking for?"

Logan stopped shifting from foot to foot and looked Hank straight in the eye.

"Internal damage caused by rape."

There was a dead silence in the small room. Hank openly stared at him in shock.

"Stars and garters! How did it happen? Who did this? Was I mistaken assuming that your mission went well?"

"We had some minor problems on mission, and gathered all needed data. It happened… later."

"What do you mean? Were you attacked?"

"No."

"So, who did this to him?"

Hank didn't intend to let it go. He had once turned his back on the young man, letting the others leave him in Antarctica. He should have insisted on checking if Remy was alive or dead before leaving. He never should have trusted Rogue's word. He made a vow not to do it again.

"Me."

This one, short word stopped Hank MacCoy in his tracks. He couldn't talk, couldn't move… only stare at his friend in complete shock. He had thought that they were friends? Logan's attitude problems and bad mood were infamous among X-men but this?

Suddenly, in a move that surprised both men, Hank jumped out from his chair and caught Logan by his shirt throwing him, hard on the wall. Before he had time to take a breath, Logan's hands were forcefully pinned to the wall and very angry, full of deadly fangs, face was only mere inches from his.

"I suggest you have a good explanation for this, or I should find out how much, that adamantium skeleton of yours, can endure." He growled deep inside his chest.

Claws shot out with loud /snikt/ but Logan hid them away instantly. He had no wish to fight his friend. He deserved it, there was no question.

Besides Hank, usually a very gentle and calm man, was due to his mutation, gifted with inhuman strength that had far overgrown his and agility. If the blue doctor wished to, he could be VERY dangerous.

"I don't know what exactly happened!" He snarled.

"Speak!"

"We came back to our hideaway and started arguing. Then we fought. I didn't want to hit him that hard. He lost control over his charge and blew my shirt up. I guess I went feral because it hurt like fucking hell. When I came back to myself it was morning and I could SMELL what happened. I really don't remember much. Only a few images."

Beast snarled once more and let go of him. In an instant, turning back into the harmless scientist. Only Logan's aching wrists were proof of his other side.

* * *

Finally Logan heard the front door crack, telling him that Remy finally leaved the med lab. Wasting no time he went down to ask Beast some questions.

As usual, the door wasn't locked. He silently entered the lab, where Hank was putting away some medical stuff.

"How is he?"

Hank took his glasses off and massaged the base of his nose as he was wont to do. The headache was wearing on him. He sighed and looked at his concerned friend.

"You know that I can't tell you anything. He is my patient after all." There was a slight bitterness and sadness to his voice.

"Yeah, yeah… just tell me how bad it is. I'm sure you can do that."

Hank sighed again.

"He is well. You didn't hurt him, Logan. I really cannot tell you more."

Logan nodded his head and headed back to the door.

"And Logan…"

"Yes?"

"He needs rest. Give him some time, before you force him to confront you." Said Hank quietly, never looking at Logan.

"OK, thanks Hank."

* * *

Remy finally reached the Boathouse. All he wanted now was a warm bath and sleep. He felt terribly tired. Not only physically, but also emotionally. The physical that Hank had run on him kept him in constant tension.

He went to the lab wanting to tell Beast only to check on his head. He had already checked, while changing clothes, if he was bleeding.

Surprisingly, he wasn't. Even after being fucked three times in a row by a feral Wolverine, he had no tearing. He felt sore and ached but, to be true, it wasn't bad. Just discomfort. If the situation was different, he would probably be glad.

His most serious injury was that ugly bruise on his temple. It caused nausea, and stress. Probably why he felt so sick, because he dropped his shields. It always had its price.

He kicked the door closed, not bothering to lock it. No one would come here to bother him anyway.

He briefly thought about Stormy. Something cold and hard clutched on his heart and he forced himself to stop thinking about his petite. It hurt too much to see the look of despise in her eyes every time she saw him.

He took the trench coat off and threw it on the nearest chair.

He heard knocking. First, he was alarmed that it could be Logan. He considered not opening the door at all, when he heard Bobby's voice calling him.

"Remy, open up!"

There was a strange tone to his voice that caught Remy's attention. And the fact that he was calling his name. After a while he realized that Bobby was ALWAYS calling him by his real name, along with Storm when she still cared about him.

"I know you are there, I saw you!"

Curious, Remy opened the door and let the Iceman in. He briefly took in his appearance. Short, blond hair and icy blue eyes in classic, handsome face. He was well built – heavier than Remy but shorter. After all, almost everyone was shorter than him.

But something in that boyish face changed in these last few months. Remy hadn't seen him lately and only now realized how… mature he looked. Under that prankster's mask, hid a grown man, that was still considered a boy by his teammates.

Probably a mistake.

"Bobby… what are you doing here, ami?"

"Um…" Bobby shifted slightly, surprised by paleness of young thief. "I heard you were hurt on this mission, and when you didn't come to the mansion, I figured that you were feeling pretty sick, you know… that long flight, and probably…" He drifted off, realizing he was babbling terribly. It happened when he was nervous, well not only then.

He abruptly handed Gambit a package he was holding. Out of habit, Remy took it before he knew what he was doing. The package was… warm?

He looked questioningly at the package and then at Bobby, who blushed furiously.

"I know you will probably think its stupid, but… it's a dinner. You didn't eat with the rest of the team and hearing that you were wounded I thought you wouldn't be in the mood to cook yourself, I mean I wouldn't, so I brought you your dinner. It's still warm… - He again trailed off, shifting uneasily. He was truly afraid that Remy would start laughing.

"It's not stupid. It's… nice. It has been a long time since somebody cared about dis ol' thief… thank you Robert." Remy decided that this young man – older than he – deserved respect. In the X-Men he was always the Benjamin, the youngest one. But Remy felt he should somehow show that he respected him. He really did. It took courage to expose himself like that.

"Why?" It was Remy who broke the awkward silence.

Blue eyes met red on black.

"We never were much of friends, but that whole thing with Antarctica… I never wanted it to happen to you. You shouldn't have ever been left in that place. I… don't think I could ever understand how scary it must have been for you. I mean… ice is natural for me… Anyway I couldn't just stay quiet. I wanted to apologize ever since you returned but… I could probably say there was no time but it wouldn't be true. I was afraid. Scared that you wouldn't ever forgive me. Maybe we weren't friends, but we were teammates and… I am sorry. I truly am."

Remy's hands trembled so much he was afraid he would drop the warm plate. The last thing he expected, coming here, was Drake apologizing.

He blinked few times and tried to smile reassuringly.

"Gambit… doesn't know what to say. Dis…"

"I know it's probably not the perfect time…"

"Non!" Remy said abruptly. "It's the perfect time. Really."

Bobby looked at him and noticed every bruise and scratch. He noticed how pale the thief was and how tired. But now, something was shining in his eyes, that were strangely hollow when he came.

"I hope you don't hate me."

"I do not." Said Gambit, not realizing he started talking in first person again. Bobby however noticed and was glad. In all this time they worked together, Remy never spoke to him like that.

"It isn't like you could have done something anyway.".

"But I did." Bobby said softly.

"What?"

"I went back."

Remy stared at Iceman for a long, endless moment.

"What are you saying, Robert?"

"Took one of the jets, saying that I needed to go somewhere. They had too much on their minds to listen to me carefully… they never do. I forged the jet's journal and flew back to Antarctica. Data base says I was in Europe. I looked for you for three days, till they called me back. I knew something was wrong. Rogue said you were dead but I couldn't find your body. And there of all places, there aren't many animals that could destroy the body, at least not that quickly.

There was a long silence again. Remy put the plate on the table and sat down on the couch. His hands were still shaking, but not so badly.

"Why…? I thought you had a thing for Rogue…"

"Long ago, yes… but I grew up Remy. There always was only one person I loved. Always will." There was and edge of sadness in his voice. Something so deep and true it could break the heart.

"Anyway she said she loved you, but took Joseph for her lover in less than a week after declaring for you. And leaving you there. I realized she was selfish and cold a long time ago. Just never knew why you didn't see it. You are a good judge of character, usually.

Remy thought about Sinister and only snorted. Yeah, real good…

"Remy never knew you came back for him."

"Well… no one knew." Not even Hank, he mused privately and couldn't stop the sudden feeling of despair. Just when has it all gone so wrong? He was slowly loosing his friends and couldn't do anything to stop it. What hurt the most was the knowledge that it wasn't Hank's fault. It was only his.

"So? Are you still mad?" He managed to put on his best puppy look in attempt to loosen the atmosphere a bit.

Remy truly smiled this time. Then beamed at the blond man.

"After all, dis ol' thief can't be mad at somebody that brings him food, can he?"

"No, you can't."

Bobby touched his arm to force him to look at him again.

"It's good to have you back Remy. I missed you."

Remy felt burning in his eyes, but blinked the tears away.

"It's good to be back." He said and, for the first time, really meant it.

"I should go. You look bad. You should get some sleep, but don't forget to eat first!"

"Oui, pappa. But before you go, tell Remy what eats on you?"

At first Bobby wanted to lie, but realized that if he wanted Remy to trust him, he would have to trust him too.

"Just… I told you I am in love with somebody and… that person… doesn't see me that way. Normally I am OK with it. I mean… I had a
lot of time to get used to it, but sometimes it's just harder to pretend than other times. And lately I realized that this person did something I don't approve of. I think I am losing the friendship, you know? Till now I couldn't have a lover, but had a friend. Now however…" He sighed and looked away. His icy blue eyes betraying the depth of his feelings.

"It hurts. Hurts all the time. I never thought that love should be such a painful thing, you know? Always believed that it should give you joy not despair."

Suddenly, Robert Drake aka Iceman, looked a lot more than his twenty-six years.

"Remy knows what you mean, really knows…" He though about Jean-Luc, the father that he had to leave behind, about Belladonna his wife,
that he could never know, friends and family that were lost forever. Yes. He knew everything about loss.

"There is nothing that can be done. It has just been eating at me for so long."

Remy knew about whom Bobby was talking, Hank MacCoy.

"It's Hank, isn't it?" He asked softly.

Bobby tensed for a moment, but realizing Remy wasn't judging him, just making sure, relaxed.

"Is it so obvious?"

" Non. Not at all. Remy have only now figured it out. You said "after all dis time"… for how long have you known…"

"That I was in love with Hank?" Finished Bobby.

"Oui. When did you realize it?"

Bobby smiled a small, infinitely sad smile and looked away, but not seeing anything. Right now he was very, very far away.

"When I was eighteen."

"Eight years…"Remy said slowly. It was a long time. No crush could survive so long. He knew enough marriages that fell apart in much shorter time.

"I… I should go now." Bobby stood up abruptly. Remy pretended not to notice the single tear on his new friend's cheek. It was clearly a very painful subject for Bobby, and Remy didn't want to push it.

His empathy told him enough. It was a true, desperate love that nearly squeezed tears from his own eyes.

"Maybe we could go get a beer sometime?" Asked Bobby heading to the door.

"Oui, that would be nice."

He carefully shut the door and locked it this time. He had a lot to think about. And a phone call to make.



Chapter 4

Remy fell on the bed with a loud sigh. He was tired, very, very tired. But he had too much on his mind to actually be able to fall asleep. So he took the phone and dialed a certain number. This talk could help him a lot.

"Hello?" said a female voice in a strong, cold manner. It sent shivers down his spine every time he heard it.

"Miss me Chere?" He asked halfheartedly. He was too exhausted to really flirt.

"Remy? What's wrong? You sound strange." said the Woman in a totally different voice. Remy winced. Dis woman! Nothing can be kept from her.

"Pshaw! You're always so subtle."

"What happened? You know you can't lie to me. Or do you want me to catch the nearest flight to Westchester and beat the answer out of you?"

The young man closed his eyes listening to the sound of her clear voice. Her words, said in a harsh voice could be taken as a threat easily, especially when one knew her. But not Remy. Sometimes he wondered if he pissed her off enough, would she come to him? But they both knew that would never happen. He couldn't go to her and she. she would have to have a damn good reason to meet with him. It would have rough consequences on her anyway.

"Nothing."

"Remy." This time she was really angry.

"It's not'ing you can help wit' anyway, Belle."

He heard his wife sigh on the other end of the line. He smiled weakly trying to imagine how she was trying to control her anger. She was always a pistol. It didn't take long to drive her mad.

"Tell me what happened," that was definitely an order.

"Remember dat mission I talked about last time?"

"Oui."

"T'ings went wrong. Very wrong Chere."

"I'm listening."

"Logan and I started fighting. In de heat of action he hit me too hard and I lost consciousness. But before I pass out, I charged his shirt." He knew better than to try to speak to Belladonna in third person. She may just blow up his bike as an example again. Maybe she never came over, but the Assassin's Guild had very long arms, and when their head - Belladonna - was unhappy, so was Remy. He still missed his last bike.

"De explosion knocked him out cold. When he came 'round, he was feral. I was afraid he would kill me so I used the Charm."

"How much of it did you use?" She asked as a matter of fact. She knew what it was and what it could do.

"All of it." answered Remy softly. He could hear the sharp intake of breath meaning she realized what must have happened after.

"How bad did he hurt you? Wasn't there a chance of killing him?"

"Belle." He said softly. "De man is. was my only friend left here. I didn't want to kill him."

"So being.hurt was better? When will you finally learn to fight back you thief!"

"Aw. but Cherie. I do know how to fight. Jus' didn't want too. 'Sides it wasn't so bad. De Wolverine was almost. gentle. One would never have know."

"What was the reason for your fight?" Remy opened his red on black eyes and stared at the ceiling, remembering the still figure in the tank.

"Chere.do you remember what I tol' you once about Sinister?"

"Oui."

"I tol' you dat dere was somet'ing dat scared me? Terrified me? Well. I've seen it again. Logan accidentally found Sever."

"Did she see you?"

"I don't know."

"Why are you so afraid of dat woman? She isn't immortal."

"But I don't know what can kill her. She.she is to me like a black hole dat sucks in every emotion. I am an empath, Chere and meeting someone dat doesn't FEEL anyt'ing is scary, but she.I don't really know. But dat's not everything."

"What do you mean, thief?"

"Dat time in laboratory.when Sinister forced me to use my Charm."

"Oui?"

"I haven't tol' you everyt'ing."

"What do you mean?"

"I woke up three days later. And it wasn't Sinister who I was wit' dat whole time. I can't remember anyt'ing. but."

"But what?!"

"Sever returned to de Tank also t'ree days later."

"So you think she kidnapped you?"

"I don't know Chere. According to Sinister she shouldn't have been able to t'ink by herself. Her mind it was replaced wit' bio-computer. Alors, I don't think she is jus' a machine."

"I will send my spies to look for her. If she is still in that lab, they'll find her. And destroy her."

"Non! She would kill dem and track you down too Chere! It's too dangerous Belle. Promise not to pursue Sever. I've seen her in action. She is a perfect killer. No weapon could take her down. Promise me."

There was a long silence.

"Please Belle." He begged. "You are de only one dat is left from my family. I love you. S'il vous plait, don't do it. I don't want you to die. Dat wasn't why I fought wit' Julien, why I was exiled. S'il vous plait! '

There was a long exhale and finally an answer.

"D'accord. I promise. But I will send my spies to find her."

"Dat would be good. But.dere could be problems if somebody knew you were helping me."

"Now I am the headmaster of the Assassin's Guild. I'm not like my father. I won't bend my head before the old rules. I am much stronger than him, and it is me who establishes rules. If somebody disagrees.he dies."

"You've changed Belle. Never knew, you were such an unforgiving person."

"They let Julien, that crazy, psychopath fight with you. In Dual?! For God's sake. How could he challenge you on your honor if he had none of his own? They exiled you, my husband, because you won the dual. I am not going to forgive them dat. Not now, not ever. They say what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, and I believe in it."

"Je t'aime my wife."

"And I love you, you worthless thief." He smiled at the ending.

She disconnected without saying goodbye. They never said it. Feeling a lot better he finally allowed his exhausted body to fall asleep.

* * *

That was it. He had to go to the mansion. All his food supplies were gone. And he really wasn't in the mood to go shopping. After all, he still risks his life while working for the x-men, so they could provide him some food. After making up his mind, he grabbed a paper bag and headed for the mansion kitchen. If he was lucky, he wouldn't meet anybody there. The place was empty and Remy was glad. The bruise still ached and he wasn't feeling like listening to Warren's accusations or Scott's coldness. But his relief was poisoned by a stray thought - a memory actually.

Out of the blue he remembered the breakfasts he used to have here with the rest of the team. Warren teasing Jean or Scott, usually by telling everybody regardless of wether or not they wanted to listen, about his current girlfriend. Or Bobby babbling on about something or other or pulling pranks on poor some unsuspecting victim.

There was usually a lot of laughter. But sometimes it was quiet. After a particularly difficult mission when everyone needed time to cool down from the adrenaline rush.

He remembered feeling a part of this family. He felt good. What a foolish belief. His desperate need to be a part of something has always caused him a lot of troubles, but he seemed to never learn from it. He remembered Rogue too but refused to think about that woman. He still wasn't sure that he wouldn't kill her the moment he saw her. What was the funniest thing in his life, was he really did love her.

Now however he was hating her with equal passion. It was strange how love was so close to hate. A dull ache that always companioned the thought of the white stripped southern belle was here. Even when his thoughts were angry, violent and bitter, the love still lingered somewhere deep in his heart. One thing he was sure of now. He would never feel the same again. He felt completely burned out. He could not trust anybody enough to love them.

Remy closed his eyes trying to wish the pain to go away.

Some people thought of him as naive because he still sot love. They thought of him as being stupid, blind to harsh reality. But that wasn't the truth.

He had had his share of pain in life, maybe more so than most of the others. Still he refused to see only the pain. So what, if the world outside was angry and bad? Cold?

It was his choice to see only the joy in life. He never stopped loving people. He offered his heart to the ones he cared for in a fruitless attempt to
create, and find his own family - something he never was blessed with.

But now looking at the empty table with chairs full of ghosts of the past, he started wondering if they were right.

Maybe putting his heart on a silver platter wasn't such a good idea. So far, all he got in return was heartache and disappointment. He felt tired of trying, when he had no chances of winning. Having lived just 23 years, he felt just too tired like an old man.

He looked at the dark world outside the window. The rain poured like the skies were crying.

It was gray and getting dark quickly. He wondered if the weather had something to do with Storm's bad mood.

Remy sighed loudly. He missed her. The cool, distant Goddess was very close to his heart. Although grown up woman, older than him, he still considered her his little Stormy. He met her as a five-year-old girl and no matter what had happened later, her image lasted. Mon Dieu! How he missed her.

He ran his fingers thought his long, soft hair and pretended he didn't feel the burning in his eyes. Remy knew that others often wondered why he had returned. Why stay where nobody wanted him. He really didn't know. There was just something that kept him there. That wouldn't let him go.

Like there was a place he could always return to.

"Get a grip Gambit!" He chided himself and shook like a dog trying to get rid of the stray, dark thoughts.

He felt her long before he saw her. The feeling hit him hard. His shields were weakened by his mental and physical exhaustion. And they didn't protect him from the disgust and anger that literally pour off of Storm as she entered the kitchen.

The dark skinned woman with shockingly white hair locked her blue eyes with the red on black ones. A painfully wave of disappointment and anger washed over him.

He took a step back before he even had the time to think about it. A wave of nausea swept over him and he fumbled to make his shields stronger.

Storm's eyes were cold. She still couldn't understand how Remy could have worked for Sinister. It was just beyond her. All the time she had believed she had known him. Knew his fondness for children and his good heart, but how could he do something so disgusting? Working for that monster? Leading Marauders to the Morlocks Tunnels? Was it because of the money? Why?

Remy didn't need to hear her questions. It was all there in her face, eyes and the way she FELT. But who she was to judge him? Since his return no one, not once asked about Sinister. None ever asked why, had he worked for that man? They just judged him and left. The pain and anger like a tidal wave washed through him. He felt the bitter taste of betrayal in his mouth and his throat tightened painfully. It hurt, Mon Dieu, how it hurt.

He tried to say something but couldn't utter a single word. He just stared at Ororo with unreadable eyes. Red pupils flashing with emotions he kept inside. His fingers itched to charge something, anything, just to lessen the storm in his soul.

"What are you doing here?" She asked her voice colder than usual. It was edged with suspicion. He felt like his guts were being jerked out of him and twisted, very slowly and very, very painfully.

Suddenly the feeling changed. Why does he have to suffer all the time? Doesn't he deserve some happiness?

"Why you ask, Chere?" He asked mockingly. His voice held a trace of venom in it. "Gambit t'ink dat you already know yo' answer."

Something desperate and dark drew her attention. It just wasn't like him to be this way.

"What are you talking about?"

He cocked his head, using the advantage of his height and leaned casually against the wall, pretending that all his muscles weren't
painfully tight.

It was time to show her his other side; a side of him that only his enemies knew. But anything was better than showing her his pain. Anything. And anger would help him forget, even if it was only for a moment.

"You ask, what Gambit do here, but you suspect de thief wants to steal somethin'. N'est-ce pas mon ami?"

Storm watched mesmerized as before her own eyes he changed into complete different person - full of anger and hurt. Without even any additional abilities she could tell what he felt was hurt.

"I never accused you of stealing. Never would."

"Why?" He moved so quickly, that she barely noticed it. In a matter of heartbeat he was standing in front of her, nearly nose to nose and his eyes burned like twin fires in the pitch black night, casting scary glow on his handsome features. His long auburn bangs had slipped free from the loose ponytail to fall in his face. And they could not mask the obvious pain and anger.

"You already judged dis thief." He pointed himself.

"You t'ink he wouldn't steal but you t'ink he would kill!"

"What is this all about?"

His eyes narrowed to a tiny slits, glowing red.

"You ask?!" He laughed bitterly. "You asked what it is all about?! Now?" He shook his head and headed for the door. But Storm didn't allow him too.

"Remy answer me. Why?"

He jerked his arm free not caring about anything anymore.

"Off all de X-Men Gambit believed you would be de one to."

"To what?"

"To ask dat question earlier."

"What do you mean? What question?"

"If you don't know, Gambit has nothing to say here."

He cast her a very hard, foreign glance. "Let go petite. You are no longer Gambit's friend." There was an edge to his voice that almost was like a threat and Storm stepped back. She never knew him to be like that - angry, bitter and vicious.

He stood in opened door, not caring about storm rising outside.

"You better watch yourself petite." He said in unnatural voice. "'Cose if you make a mistake, dat x-men of yours could not forgive you for either. They could even sentence you to death."

"You were never sentenced to death! It was an accident! Rouge thought you were dead!" A loud peal of thunder seemed to punctuate her words. Her control was slipping.

"Oh really? Gambit must have been mistaken. All dat ice, easy to... misunderstand... some actions. Wish you well Chere," with that he slammed the door behind him self and headed into the garage.

It was just too much for him.

* * *

A sudden sound surprised Storm, who was still staring at the closed door. A slow clapping, she whirled around and saw Logan standing in the entrance. A cigar in his mouth, arms crossed and body casually leaned against the wall. When she noticed him, Logan pushed away and headed in her direction.

"Good work Ro. Really good work."

"I do not understand what are you talking about. I don't even know what he was talking about. What question?"

He stared at her for a long, unnerving moment.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"You never asked him WHY he had worked for Sinister.

None of you did."

There was a long, painful silence after that.

"I have a piece of advice for you 'Ro."

"And it is...?"

"You better keep away from the kid. If you ever treat him like that again.it will be ME you will be dealing with."

"What?!" She asked shocked. Logan never showed such protectiveness towards anybody except his lovers, and Remy definitely wasn't one of them.

"I won't say it twice. None of us is saint here, 'Ro. Why do you judged him so harsh for gods sake?! I probably have murdered more people than died in The Morlock Massacre. And Rogue was terrorist. She killed innocents! Civilians! All of us have a past of his own. But no one was judged so far except him.

Storm averted her gaze.

Suddenly they heard the sound of a bike roaring.

"You better do something with this storm, before the kid kills himself." Logan said and headed for the door that Gambit left by.

"What are you going to do?" Storm called after him.

"Catch him and beat some reason into that thick skull of his, and then straighten some things out.


Understanding - Evanescence

The pain that grips you
The fear that binds you
Releases life in me
In our mutual shame we hide our eyes
To blind them from the truth that finds a way from who we are

Please don't be afraid
When the darkness fades away
The dawn will break the silence screaming at our hearts

My love for you still grows
This I do for you
Before I try to fight the truth my final time

Can't wash it all away
Can't wish it all away
Can't cry it all away
Can't scratch it all away

Lying beside you
Listening to you breathe
The light that flows inside of you burns inside of me

Hold and speak to me
Of love without a sound
Tell me you will live through this and I will die for you
Cast me not away
Say you'll be with me
For I know I cannot bear it all alone

Can't fight it all away
Can't hope it all away
Can't scream it all away
It just won't fade away




Chapter 5

Sever stood in the dark kitchen of Mark's apartment and tried to understand why her database was incomplete

data, six years back, 19.00 hour
Access denied
It just wasn possible
Display data, six years back, 18,56 hour
Data displaying
Display data, six years back, 18,57 hour
Data displaying
Display data, six years back, 18,58 hour
Data displaying
Display data, six years back, 18,59 hour
Data displaying

Display data, six years back, 19.00 hour
Access denied
Display data, six years back, 19.01 hour
Access denied
Display data, six years back, 19.02 hour
Access denied
Display data, six years back, 19.03 hour
Access denied
Display data, six years back, 19.04 hour
Access denied
Display data, six years back, 19.05 hour
Access denied

Display data, six years back, 19.06 hour
Data displaying

Five minutes. What had happened during that time? Her memory was like data gathered on a hard drive. She could display every minute, second of it whenever she needed. She should be the only one with access to it. But now something was blocking her. It seemed that the 5 minutes were sealed with a kind of barrier, code that she simply didn't know.

Display data, six years back, 19:00 hour.
Access denied.
Copy data, six years back, 19:00 to 19:05 hour.
Access code required .

Sever shifted. Code?
Code bypass.
Intruder alert, means of defense enabled.

Sudden pain jerked Sever out of her concentration. As fast as it came, it was gone. She felt something moist on her face and reached to touch it.

Her fingertips were dark. Only after a moment did she realized it was blood. Her blood. She shifted her gaze to the dark, mirror-like window and studied her pale, nearly white face. And angry red blood dripping steadily from her nose.

How could she be an intruder, in her own mind?

But that wasn't the only gap in her mind. She had one more

There was another mystery as well. At first, when she was created, in her mind were written objectives - destroy by any means possible enemies pointed by anyone that could give her the appropriate code. Twelve years ago, after her first field test, her memory was blocked again. Five minutes. From 19:00 to 19:05 hour. After that her priorities changed.

No1: Find Remy LeBeau.

The second change occurred after the second memory gap - six years ago.

No1: Defend Remy LeBeau.

But this wasn't just a simple command. Every time she did something that involved LeBeau, she. FELT. Really felt emotions; anger, sadness, confusion. They were strong, and alien. She was aware that emotions were only effects of chemical reactions in the brain. But she had no "brain". Not one in which any reaction could take place. She was a machine a bio computer.

And the objective, "Defend" it was too imprecise to be a command. Defend from what? What was a threat, and what wasn't? In reality she shouldn't be able to understand the command at all. She should never be able to wake up from her rest without a command being given.

Her original programming assumed self-destruction in case her bio-computer evolved into something that allowed her to learn. A unit that can learn can not be controlled. And she learned. Just few hours ago she learned about hunger.

She shifted once again and looked at the window. Mike agreed to take her to Westchester. He said she should get some sleep but resting in horizontal position was unnatural for her.

* * *

Logan was out in time to see the shiny, black and yellow kawasuki ninja leave the grounds in a splash of gravel. Remy rode it with great mastery as usual, but today something was wrong. Maybe it was the terrible weather or maybe his emotional state but the unbelievably fast motorcycle took the turn swaying unsteadily and Logan cursed under his breath. That kid was going to kill himself!

* * *

Remy grinned wickedly feeling the bike gaining the speed of 60 mph in less than 2.3 seconds. The air whistled in his ears and he pushed the machine further. The engine between his legs roared and the light Japanese miracle jumped forward with breathtaking speed.

The gravel of the driveway covered with mud was too slippery and for a brief moment Remy had problems with keeping the machine steady.

The motorcycle swayed, wheels turning to fast lost its attachment to the ground and for a second Remy wasn't sure he would get out of this, but his reflex once again came in and he managed to steady the bike. Laughing out loud he forced the machine up to speed again. The narrow and shiny motorcycle cut through the stormy night with unbelievable ease. He took the gate at the speed of 90 mph and had to grip the handle bars more tightly because the speed took his breath away, especially when he knew that the bike could easily accelerate to 125 mph. The only thing that slowed him down was the weather. The rain poured so heavily that it was difficult to see anything further away than his nose, even with his night vision

The stretch to the gate he drove nearly on memory, neatly avoiding any obstacles. When he finally shot out on the solid road he forced his bike to speed up once more. At 105 mph he felt a wild surge of adrenaline in his veins, pushing all the other feeling away.

Riding with such a speed in weather that no one with common sense would leave the house, he felt free and on edge. He knew that one mistake, one careless movement, one small mistake could cost him his life.

His red on black eyes flashed with a madman's joy and he gripped the bike harder and took the hazard, a very narrow turn into the muddy, barely visible forest road. Only his mutant eyes allowed him to see anything. The trees seemed to jump from nowhere and forced him to do crazy convolutions to avoid crashing on one of them.

It took extreme concentration on his driving of the skittish bike to speed it up as much as it could go. It took him quite a long to realize that he was hearing something more than the whistling of air as the raindrops splashed on his face with the force of small bullets and the roaring of his elegant, speed demon machine. It was the sound of an engine of a powerful, classical monster that was coming up behind him. The low, deep and guttural sound allowed Remy to instantly recognising its owner.

Logan's bike - the classical Harley Davidson - was just like him big, heavy emanating with strength. The big bike could never accelerate as fast as his lean Kawasaki could, but the classical monster had better attachment to the ground. Maybe Logan needed to lessen the speed to take the narrow turn, but where Remy almost loose the ground-jumping on the unevenness Logan's Harley seemed to barely notice it at all and easily accelerated.

Both machines were totally different from each other but as they each took the difficult forest road they seem to be equals. When one gained advantage, other was weak and the other way around.

Although Logan was still far away, Remy could tell he was chasing him. Probably saw what happened in the kitchen. But Remy wasn't in the mood to talk. He bent lower over the handle bars and sped up a little more, not daring to check with what actual speed he was riding anymore.

* * *

Logan cursed colorfully hearing the maddeningly expensive bike roar and speed up significantly. That stupid Cajun really did want to kill himself! That stupid son of a bitch. he should leave him to it. He should just stand aside and watch how kid was doing everything that's possible to bust his head open on the nearest tree but couldn't. Because that was the problem everyone stood aside, no one really tried to help the kid after The Trial. Besides there was that strange, strong feeling that urged him to take care of that boy.

Last night he remembered more of the events of that fatal night. There was just one thing he couldn't possibly understand. If he became feral, why did he want the thief? Always, every time he went feral the only thing he wanted was blood. He was only partly human; his animal part trained in killing by Weapon X, often took the best of him. But then he was nothing more than a blood thirsty animal, a monster. It was strange that he didn't kill him in the first place and that he didn't hurt him more. Logan had questions that he suspected only Remy knew answers to.

But he would be lying to himself if he didn't admit that in his need to find and to protect the young thief was something much more than the simple need for answers.

He cared.

Sure, he cared for others in the team - after all they were his friend, teammates. They fought side by side in many battles, but his feelings for the kid were completely different. He was afraid he was falling, falling for the beautiful big mouthed thief and he was doing it fast.

Standing in that kitchen door way and watching Storm giving Remy the cold shoulder, her anger and suspicious and the most important thing, her disappointment made him really want to step in and stand up for the kid. He felt a surge of anger so strong it thru him off balance. It was then that he stared wondering or realizing maybe, that his feeling were too strong. Even considering what happened he still was too interested in the kid.

Nothing could explain the hard on, that his smell was giving him. It was really embarrassing to react so strongly. and to do it towards a male. Logan wasn't homophobic or nothing. He had few encounters with men in his rather dark past but it never meant anything. Just one night stands. He tended to forget about them as soon as he left the bed. But now he just couldn't throw certain red eyed thief out of his mind.

Today he caught himself trying to catch a sound or a smell that could tell him something more about Remy. He realized that his friendship, the reason for never pushing the kid away after The Trial had an undertone to it. LeBeau wasn't just a drinking buddy, just a friend. He was a mystery to him.

Maybe Logan wasn't the most educated in the mansion and maybe he wasn't psychic, but he had his mind, his senses that often told him more than words and he surely knew how to observe people. No one was a mystery to him. He knew about emotional level of Charles- Eric relations, realized Scott sternness had something to do with the pain he often smelled on him, and faint scars he happened to see in the showers or the changing room. Storm's loneliness. Bobby's crush on Hank that started almost eight years ago. But he rarely knew the reasons for Remy to act in certain ways. The man, so much younger than him, often surprised him. He was just a mystery mine. Time and again he said or did something that showed him from completely different angle.

Logan heard the distant thunder and realized that Storm had probably calmed down some and was trying to ease the rainstorm. No matter how mad she was, he knew she would never put her teammates in danger.

Somewhere behind the sound of the raindrops splashing on leaves he heard the other bike taking a dangerously fast turn and realized he knew where the thief was heading. Baring his teeth he sped up and diverged from the forest road into the barely visible path made by wild animals.

Using his mutant reflexes and agility, he skidded past the trees and low bushes missing them by mere inches, determined to cut the thief off.

* * *

When the storm changed into downpour and then into simple rain Remy realized something was wrong. He was already used to hearing the constant, low growl of Logan's monster somewhere behind him when the sound changed. Suddenly the engine was in front of him, and was
nearing!

It was only a matter of heartbeat when shiny, heavy bike jumped out of bushes right by his side. Surprised and more than a little terrified Remy tried frantically to keep the bike steady but when he thought he would get out of this in one piece he saw Logan's shining, nearly yellow eyes and grin baring his long canines. His wet hair fell on his forehead. He looked mad. And before Remy had even the time to think, Logan drove very close to him, pushing him out of path and with the result shove forced him to jump from his bike to avoid crashing.

He swiftly jumped into the air and landed gracefully on the ground, rolling to ease the force of impact. Although he couldn't see it he could hear the scratching of the metal as his bike skidded down the road and gritted his teeth in anger.

"What are you doin' Wolverine?! Tryin' to kill Gambit? You encule de mere!" He shouted as soon as he was able to take his breath. He didn't stop shouting but continued with curses about Logan's origin and his ancestory to about four generations back.

Logan watched the angry thief throwing every French and English curse at him, he could remember. The lean, graceful Cajun looked like a drowned cat, with his clothes dripping water and mud and some leaves and even a few pieces of grass too. His long, usually shiny hair was completely wet and dirty, hanging in complete disorder were his dark bangs.

Red eyes flashed and every once in awhile Remy had to stop his tirade to spit out some grass or stray leaf that he had somehow managed to swallow.

He looked very sexy and cute as hell.

"You connard! Stupid bastard!" Remy suddenly stopped. His empathy suddenly picked up a feeling that he never expected to come from the Wolverine, especially not in such a situation - amusement!

It pissed him off even further. How could that old, sick motherfucker be amused when he nearly killed him?

The temper took the best of him and the next thing Logan knew, he was lying on his back with a very beautiful, very wet, and very, very angry Cajun cat-like snarling at him, baring his teeth and straddling him.

"Remy will show you!"

It was all too much. Every thought about bringing some sense into the kid fled his mind and Logan couldn't help himself. He started laughing hysterically, trashing in an attempt to catch a breath and to escape. Gambit sat dumbfounded on Logan's stomach and watched him nearly suffocate with laughter. That bastard nearly howled in amusement.

"Cul." He muttered.

But the anger was leaving him. After all, they were two grown men, lying in a pool of mud. He tried to imagine how he looked sitting on Wolverine's stomach when he was almost rolling with laughter.

"Merde." He said once more and gave up. Soon he was laughing as hard as Logan, although he couldn't possibly understand why was he doing it.

After what seemed like ages Logan finally calmed down a bit, and managed to catch his breath. He wanted to say something but his voice died.

He looked up and saw Remy sitting with his head thrown back. Long, completely wet hair was hanging from his head and flowing down his shoulders. Pale and beautifully shaped face was constantly washed by cold raindrops. Some of them hung on his long, dark lashes that any woman would probably kill for. Other drops flew down his sharp cheekbones to his soft delicate lips - now white from the cold. In this position his neck was completely exposed and Logan had problems with swallowing, imagining how it would be to press his hard lips to that tender flesh? His hands itched to feel that soft hair, to cradle that well shaped skull and bring him down, to meet his lips. Why was he reacting like this?

The last threads of laughter died on Remy's lips and he looked down at the strong man he was still straddling. Strong. That was the word he always associated with Logan. Short but heavy with rippling muscles easily seen under wet the black t-shirt. His eyes constantly changed from hazel to yellow and then back. He used to think that his eyes changed only when he was feral, but now he wasn't and his feelings that came from him now were different.want, lust? Was he mistaken?

Gambit frantically checked his shields but there was nothing leaking! So it wasn't the charm.

He had no more time to ponder it because Logan's hand shot forward and gripped him by the back of his head in strong, but not a painful grip. Simultaneously Logan twisted his body so that the younger man was thrown off of him and he immediately pressed the Cajun down with his own body weight.

"What?"

He wasn't given a chance to ever finish the question. Hard, demanding, cold from the rain lips descended onto his. He expected to be forced by his demands but got something completely different.

Softness. Light touches of infinitive care that carressed his cold lips, warming them, coaxing him to respond rather than by force. Not thinking about what was he doing or with whom, he sighed and allowed his lips to part lightly, but enough to invite that warm, strong, relentless tongue inside.

He rather felt than heard low, soft growl that escaped the heavily muscled man above him and the hand in his hair tightened positioning his head in a more convenient angle. Only then did the Wolverine deepen the kiss. But it was so much more than a simple play of tongues, much more than a caress.

Remy felt consumed, overwhelmed, absorbed, and devoured. His whole world narrowed to the man above him, to the weight pressing him into the soft ground. He briefly wondered why this wasn't scaring him. Usually lost of control terrified him, but now. The heat coming off of Logan's body seemed to warm him, protect him from the cold rain.

He felt his tongue as a hard, restless and powerful thing in his mouth. Exploring, searching, and tasting him. Remy felt the constant growling, which strangely reminded him of purring and couldn't think about anything else. Just minutes ago he was cold, now however his skin was hot and sensitive. He wished Logan would touch him more.

He opened his eyes and looked from behind his lashes at the fierce man. Logan's kin was darker than his; raindrops were flowing down his face, disappearing in his whiskers. His eyes were closed and face seemed to express thunder storm of emotions - lust, want, tenderness, concentration.

He tried to free his hands, still pressed them flat to his sides to be able to touch the older man. The sudden movement jerked Logan out of his trance and he broke the kiss, drawing his attention back to look at Remy's face.

"I am sorry.but not for the kiss," said Logan slowly. "I…"

This time it was Remy's time to take the initiative. Never leaving the sincere eyes he freed his hands and tangled his cold, lean fingers into the wet whiskers and then jerked Logan's face harshly down and sealed their lips together in a kiss.

Logan was shocked. He never expected Remy to take the lead not after what had happened between them, that assumption seemed fully understandable.

The younger man's kiss took his breath away. All that time Remy spent on chasing woman he had gone into the woods. And he now knew what to do with that wicked tongue of his.

His kiss was like the Cajun himself - hot, spicy, sophisticated. but what lay underneth was unyielding passion, that Logan could fell himself. He opened his eyes to watch the total abandon on the thief's face.

He cherished the feeling of Remy's fingers tightening in his whiskers to the verge of pain, savored the willingness of that lean, intoxicating body under him.

When Remy shifted and pressed all that hard, graceful flesh into him, Logan moaned and with a loud SNIKT released the claws in the hand which was cradling Gambits head, and the one on the thief's side. Twelve inch of deadly adamantium cut into the soft ground anchoring him in place.

Remy went rigid at the sound. Was Logan getting angry? Was he regretting this? Changing his mind? When dealing with a man of Logan's temper, one should always be careful. It was probably a very short way for him from lust to anger.

At first Logan couldn't understand why Remy had started smelling of fear. It took him a full moment to associate to his terror with the claws.

Logan pulled back for a moment and looked into the hooded eyes that tried to avoid his gaze. He tightened his hand and forced the claws back inside.

"Trust me." He said softly, waiting for the thief to look at him. When he did, Logan continued. "I won't hurt you."

Although Remy didn't disagree, he wasn't convinced either. Logan forced his arousal back, his need to continue what they had started. The most important thing right now, was to convince Remy he could be trusted and not feared.

Gambit wondered if Logan knew he could feel his frustration as well as his need and lust, but also his warmth. There was also an indefinable emotion that was warm and soft and seemed to envelop his mind in kind of safe, good feeling. It had been a long time since Remy felt this good.

He didn't need words not now, not here. All he wanted was the man above him and the fire that was born between them. Gambit was afraid of words, because they led to lies and eventually to hurt.

Remy gathered his strength and pushed Logan off of himself. Surprised, Logan complied rolling off to give the thief space. The last thing he wanted was to scare him.

But Remy wasn't scared. He just didn't want any complications. Before Logan had the time to utter a word Remy was on him again. In one smooth motion he tore the black tee-shirt in two, baring the hairy, muscular chest and bit into Logan's collarbone - sharply.

Logan howled in pleasure and surprise. The sensation of cold lips and hot tongue on his sensitized flesh send jolts of pleasure down his spine. The thief caught his wrists and pinned them over his head. Logan felt oddly right in that position even though he was vulnerable.

Remy was anything but delicate. He gripped his wrists with bruising strength. If it wasn't for Logan's healing factor he would already have bruises. Then Gambit shifted so that he was pinning Logan's hands with his bodyweight. No matter how strong Logan was, freeing his hands without serious problems wasn't possible anymore. The kid had him pined real good.

And he was aware of that because at that moment he made sure, Logan had no free movement space, he was assured of his place. He murmured something in French - no longer curses - against the wet skin of his chest and then bit hard on the other collarbone.

Logan jerked up and bucked his hips, growling louder and louder. That red headed Cajun was driving him insane!

"Easy Cher," said Remy grinning wickedly. "Remy may t'ink you don' like it." And he shifted once more; pushing his leather clad cock into Logan's clearly visible hard on. "And Gambit may slow down. you understand. like he unsure and everyt'ing." He teased grinding harder.

Logan gritted his teeth to prevent himself from moaning out loud.

"Gambit may loose some of his body parts if he doesn't stop teasing!" He snarled and unleashed his claws with a loud SNIKT.

"Uh. de Wolverine shows his claws?" Remy asked smiling and lowered his face once more. His hot tongue darted out and touching one hard, erected nipple sending a shudder through Logan's body. Then he sank his teeth deep into the tender flesh, causing Logan to arch up from the ground and hiss. Gambit tenderly licked the blood away and watched as the wound closed and disappeared not leaving even a faintest scar. He pondered trying one more time when Logan bucked hard.

"Don't even think about it Cajun!"

Remy looked into his future lover's face and asked with as much feigned innocence he could muster.

"You've got claws. Remy got teeth."

He looked so sweet and innocent that Logan couldn't process what the kid was saying.

"Always knew you were a fucking cat!"

Remy laughed hard and loud and Logan couldn't believe what that felt when his face was pressed into his stomach. His arousal went haywire and he couldn't lie still any more. As if sensing Logan's frustration Remy finally let his wrists go and swiftly opened his fly.

Logan still wished that Remy would hurry and won't change his mind now! He didn't need to be afraid. The thief's long fingers had his pants open faster than he could have imagined. And he could feel cold drops of falling rain on his heated, hard shaft. Remy's hand closed over it and stroked him hard two times and he couldn't restrain the loud moan that escaped. He was so close to climax it was scary and with no one before had he ever been so turned on.

"You want to cum, Cher?" Remy asked teasingly while slowing a little bit.

"No," said Logan breathlessly.

Remy stilled was unsure. What in the hell was happening?

Logan's hands tangled in his hair and pulled him up into the long, hot kiss.

"Let's get back home. It's too fucking cold and wet here to do anything more." He said when he was sure the thief finally got his breath back, and reached down to touch the noticeable as his own hard on Remy had. He softly traced it's contours with his fingers never touching hard enough to give enough stimulation, but still he managed to draw a whimper from the Cajun.

"In dis state, Remy can't possibly ride a bike in dis state, Cher."

"Think about that huge, warm, vibrating engine between your legs." Logan growled softly pulling the kid up and straightening his clothes.

"Oh, when you say dis dat way."


Chapter 6

Remy thought that returning home was just a waste of time, because he was afraid that when they finally reached the driveway, Logan would change his mind. But they weren't even half way back when Remy started shaking with cold. His clothes were wet and the night was real cold. But even with his teeth chatting from cold, he still couldn't get his mind off of the man riding his bike beside him. Logan. Such power, such restless energy, mystery and strength in an eye-catching package of hard, rippling muscles.

Remy was beautiful and knew it. His face and body often saved his life. Logan couldn't be called that. The word beautiful was completely out of place when considering such an example of sheer masculinity. Handsome was too weak. His face wasn't handsome or good looking. To hard, to haggard with proof of his age lurking in its shadows. Physically he wasn't old. But his eyes, his face… often showed that his long life had taken its toll.

Nevertheless, Logan seemed to Remy the most desirable man in the whole world. It wasn't new to him. The barely realized thought was always there. The way he often watched Logan. His moves, his way of observing everything around him. Wariness, distrust, loyalty. He just never allowed himself to admit the truth.

Now it was different. Out there, in the woods, something broke in him. When Logan kissed him… well he felt like a liquid fire was poured into his mind, burning all coherent thoughts out. Surprisingly, there were no memories of rape, even when Logan had pinned him down with all his considerable weight.

Then again, deep inside, he never taken what happened in that room for a rape. Maybe he didn't want that, maybe he was afraid, but also he wasn't hurt in any way and did enjoy it. No matter how cold he was, he still had a rather noticeable hard on and that wasn't making his ride back easier either. He chuckled softly. Maybe he really was a sex maniac? Laughing out loud he sped up.

"Fuck!" Logan swore and sped up after Remy. After all, he couldn't allow his lay to escape, now could he?

* * *

Bobby stood on the molo and watched the lake surface reflect the stars. How long had be been standing there? He didn't know. The cold or rain wasn't a problem for him. Basically, he was organic ice and when he was focused enough he could change into water, not only ice.

Absentmindedly, he touched his lower lip. It was swollen and ached. With a thought he changed into his ice form. As an Iceman – the code name used as an X-Men team member - he could heal from all injuries. And when he came back to himself, the wound was gone. But not the memory.

He knew he was in love with Hank, but wasn't fooling himself. The blue doctor wasn't into men. He had Cecilia then Trish. Good Ol' Bobby was just a friend. It wasn't something wrong… it was just not enough. Eight years he had fooling himself that he was happy meeting Hank for their Twinkie runs or sitting in his lab and talking about everything. But he wasn't.

He had changed, grown up. He wasn't the mansion clown any more. Bobby the prankster – that was how everyone had seen him. But he was 26 years old and he had grown up. He had his needs. Not only sexual, emotional also. The X-Men were his friends, his family; they couldn't fulfill the aching hole in his soul. He needed a lover – a body and soul. Somebody to touch, to give comfort. Someone to make him believe that what he was doing was good. Worth fighting. He was in the team, since he was 16. A long time. He met new friends, good and bad people. Watched his friends die or leave with broken hearts and souls that lost hope.

They thought that he would get over it. That he survived not changing. And that… hurt. Why didn't they look closer? Why? Only Hank, but Bobby couldn't let him see everything that bothered him, simply because he would loose his best friend.

His mutation allowed him to hide signs of his true feelings. All the others thought he was a prankster because he never grew up, but it was just a way to cover his pain, hurt and loneliness. It was strange how lonely a man can be in a sea of people.

His face never showed traces of tears – no one knew that he often came to Danger Room session after crying in his room. He never got sick. No one noticed that there was no Bobby Drake any more. It was Robert Drake and he seriously considered leaving the mansion for a while.

He learned to be an accountant. He was responsible for keeping things the way they should be. Paying the taxes etc. But did they know that he made some… investments. Maybe not too legal, but certainly profitable. It wasn't about the money. He hardly kept it to himself, usually supported some mutant shelters. Xavier was rich and was doing what he could, but he couldn't do everything.

No one really noticed when he went away for a weekend. They never suspected he had met people, mutants that knew him only as a Robert Drake. They never noticed the little bags he brought back – full of diamonds and precious stones.

He knew a woman, a mutant with the most beautiful green eyes and most cold heart. Her name was Seena and she was capable of turning simple rocks into Diamonds, Rubies, Safires … But nothing was as simple as it seemed. He knew Seena was tied to a man called Silver Tiger. Only he had the right to buy the stones. Robert however, convinced her to cheat on him, and to make a little more of the treasures.

Now his lover was gone, Seena disappeared and he heard rumors there was a price on his head.

He touched his lip once more. When did things get so complicated?

He sighed and looked at the lake once more. All he wanted was a life where he could prove himself as a Robert Drake – person, not Bobby the youngest of the X-Men.

Alex. His lover, his friend. Never did he suspect, he could be so angry. The split lip was from him. The usually gentle, caring Alex finally snapped, broken. Well, didn't surprise him, not really. It wasn't the first time. All his relationships ended in a similar way. His lovers fell in love with him and finally understood that Bobby couldn't possibly love them back. Because his heart belonged to someone else.

He couldn't even blame Alex for hitting him. He deserved it. Bobby wished he could love him like he deserved to be loved. It was selfish of him to keep that going even when he knew; there was no future for the relationship.

Every time he made love to Alex, he wished it was somebody else. He imagined it were Hank's arms that held him, Hanks body that he was touching, his voice and his warmth. Physical difference, the extremity of Hanks mutation didn't bother him at all. He was actually surprised that the blue doctor hadn't smelled the pheromones on him yet. His senses were no match for Logan but still, they were much better than ordinary humans, or mutants.

Logan for example, had known what was happening all the time, and tended to give him the "talks". Generally he didn't approve of Bobby's feelings. First Bobby was angry at him, when he still believed there could be a chance for him and Hank. It took him three years of constant fighting with the Canadian to understand that the "talks" were for his own good. Logan knew from the very beginning that Hank wouldn't accept Bobby and it was his rough way to help. Eventually, he stopped nagging Bobby if he came home smelling of sex with someone else from time to time.

How he wished Hank was here with him. Gentle genius. So caring and… it was no use in tormenting himself with such thought. He shook his
head and looked in the direction of the strange sound he was hearing from some time now.

It took him few more moments to realize it was an engine. Two, to be exact. After a minute or two, a pair of bikes came from behind the curve in the road and with surprise, Bobby recognized Logan and Remy. When they came closed he couldn't suppress a snicker. They both looked like drowned rats. Hair and clothes completely soaked, and they both were covered in mood and leaves. One started to wonder EXACTLY what they were doing in the woods.

He followed them with his gaze when they drove to the Boathouse. When the engines died an awkward silence fell, but soon Remy stood up and
offered a hand to Logan.

Bobby knitted his brow. That was strange…

Then Logan also stood up, grabbed Remy by the hand and pulled him close, into his embrace and kissed the Cajun passionately. Then he said something and they laughed. They disappeared into the Boathouse.

Iceman looked at the closed door envying and wishing them both good. In lives they led as X-Men, they hardly ever had a chance to be happy.

* * *

"You are freezing!" Complained Logan, after kissing the blue lips of his thief.

"All your fault! Why push Remy into the mud?"

"You were already wet! We need to get warm. After all we don't want you to be sick, do we?"

Remy pouted.

"Uh… Remy thought you would keep him warm…"

"Tease." Growled Logan playfully and pulled the laughing thief into the house. First get the kid warm and clean, and then… well, let's say he would probably have problems with walking the next day.

When they finally reached the bathroom Logan grunted approvingly. It had the tub big enough for two and a shower cabin. Without any more hesitation he turned the hot water on and spoke.

"Come here, thief." There was something in his voice that made Remy's stomach full of butterflies. Anxiety, arousal maybe a little uncertainty.

The next logical step would be to undress, but something made Remy feel vulnerable. Maybe it was Logan's' complete focus on him. Such attention. Although he knew that Logan had seen him naked before, undressing on his own was a completely different thing. Then he didn't really have a choice.

Logan smelled the apprehension on the younger man and growled softly at him. He did notice the shudders that ran through Remy every time he started growling.

"Second thoughts?" Asked Logan, attempting in vain to sound gentle. He just couldn't. His voice always seemed too harsh, to dry.

Remy hesitated for a moment. He was getting cold feet but… merde – he wanted that man. Not only his body – great when he was at that- but
all that strength and stability. When Logan once declared somebody's friend, he never changed his mind. Now, looking at that short but powerfully built man, Remy finally decided to let go of the fear. Nothing really bad happened. And deep under that was his basic need – a need to feel loved, owned. And Logan was possessive. Everybody knew that. Maybe it would allow Remy to finally feel wanted. Even if only for a night. He smiled and stepped closer to Logan.

"Non… jus' thinking."

Logan once more took a good look at the cold and shaking man. He needed a warm bath badly. Logan also. He felt mud in unbelievable places. He wanted to shred all the dirty clothes from the Cajun, but was afraid of scaring him shitless. After a brief thought he decided on a different course of action.

In quick, efficient moves Logan started undressing. It took him less than a minute to get rid of the offending, dirty clothes. Absolutely unfazed buy his nakedness he gathered the pile of material into his arms and thrown it into the small washing machine. Then, seemingly not noticing the kid's reaction he strode past Remy to the shower and stepped under the hot water groaning loudly at the sheer pleasure of it.

Remy just stared. He knew Logan was a heavily muscled man, he had also seen him naked that fatal night. Also he had felt that strength on his own skin. But this… this was something different.

"Merde! Get a grip on yourself! It's jus'… jus'… Mon Dieu! What a body!" He gulped loudly thinking about all the things he would like to do to that hard muscles and hairy, tanned skin. His mind was instantly filled with erotic images of Logan writhing under his ministrations and moaning. Yeah, that was something to imagine…

"Yer gonna stand there and stare? Or join me sometime soon?"

Logan's voice jerked him out of his thoughts and Remy realized he was standing, soaking wet, and staring at Logan's naked form in the shower. Quickly he got rid of his own clothes and stepped into the shower. Logan hadn't moved, forcing Remy to squeeze between him and the wall. Remy had to admit that pressing into the hot, hairy skin of Logan's body wasn't something unpleasant. No. Not at all. Maybe to be sure, he needed to do it again. For scientific reasons.

He arched and suddenly their chests were flat against each other. Logan shifted forcing Remy to change his stance and to open his legs. He felt one hard, hairy thigh pressing between his legs and force them wider apart.

"Jesus… you feel good. Real good." Purred Logan and caught Remy's mouth in a fiery kiss. Then he started moving his thigh up and down in a very slow pace, allowing Remy to really FEEL the difference in their bodies.

Remy had delicate, sensitive, thin skin and every touch of that rough hair on highly sensitive insides of his thighs shot sparks of pleasure straight into his groin. Logan moved his leg higher and pressed it into the junction of his legs. One knee pressing into his lower buttocks and thigh, the other pressing his tight balls. Remy couldn't help himself. The tongue in his mouth, the hands that caressed his neck and head. He moaned and whimpered pitifully when the sensations left him.

"What do you want?" Asked Logan.

One hand finding and rolling his hard nipple – not too gently. Remy couldn't answer. All his thoughts were concentrated on the aching member pressing into Logan's hard as a rock belly. The sensation of Logan's incredibly thick tool pressing into his hip wasn't helping either. All he could was to whimper pleadingly, looking into the hazel-golden eyes.

It was strange that when Logan was in threads of passion his eyes changed the same way they did when he was feral. But when in passion, Logan wasn't cruel or aggressive. Remy was sure that he wouldn't hurt him.

Just when he was gathering his strength to answer, Logan's hand found his member.

"Oh… merde!" He cursed when Logan squeezed hard. The initial pleasure changed into dull pain of frustration when his erection was forced to
subside.

"Logan!" He complained.

"Hush boy! You were too close. How am I supposed to play with you, when you nearly came from one touch?" His voice full of faked disappointment. But still he resumed his previous actions and Remy could only moan when that thick thigh moved again reminding him of the feel of Logan's shaft so deep inside of him.

Remy decided that his hands were idle long enough and reached out to stroke Logan's body. But Logan didn't allow it. He easily grabbed both his wrists and pinned them to the wall above the thief's head, forcing his body to arch invitingly.

"Keep them there." Growled the Canadian and then, before Remy had the time to think he sank to his knees.

"Wha…"

And then Logan licked his inner thigh. All thoughts fled Remy's mind. All he could think of was that hot, hard tongue so NEAR his aching cock and not touching it! He groaned in frustration, when Logan started licking his other thigh, completely ignoring his demanding manhood.

Then he felt the whiskers tickling on the sensitive area between his testicles and rectum. The hot water and the steam filling the air made it hard to breath. Remy arched his body even further.

He started shaking hopelessly near the climax. The hard lips that pressed into his tight sac and started SUCKING and tugging on it made him gasp and fight for every breath.

"Logan… merde…don' stop, jus' don… ah…" It was all he could say what that hot, wicked mouth closed over his aching member. Logan took only the head inside but it was enough for Remy to completely and definitely lose his mind. He started babbling in the intoxicating mix of Acadian and English, begging Logan to suck him, fuck him and cursing him for not doing either.

Logan just kept the head of that needing erection in his mouth and licked it. His tongue massaged the underside, lapped at the slit forcing moan after moan from a VERY frustrated thief.

"S'il vous plait! Logan… cher… ah, fuck me… T'encule-moi!" His head was rolling, red hair sticking to the wet tails on the wall and flowing down his shoulders. His eyes were closed but he fought to open it, to look at the sight that was Logan kneeling if front of him, sucking him and still keeping the power over him.

"What do you need Remy? Tell me." He said when he let the member slip out of his mouth. He inhaled the musky, spicy scent of his lover. The smell of his arousal, pleasure and complete abandon making the beast inside him howl with need.

"You… Logan… est-tu…"

Logan stood up and caught fistfuls of Remy's hair and forced his head lower, to kiss him deeply, possessively, completely dominating.

"Tell me… boy…" He said without taking his lips off of him. "Tell me, show me, describe to me… and then I'll give it to you."

Remy was shaking. His knees got weak but Logan was holding him. He got Remy lit like a candlestick. And the words. They were even worse than his words. They lit the fire that burned deep inside of him, in his soul, in his very being.

"Show me…" whispered Logan putting fierce, sucking kisses on his face, neck and shoulders, marking them with tiny hickeys.

"Mon Dieu Logan! You drive Remy crazy."

The teeth caught his earlobe and bit gently sending him nearly off. NEARLY. And that was the problem. Whatever Logan done to him, no mater how pleasurable, it wasn't enough.

"Want you inside. In me… on me… please…"

He was begging but didn't realize it at the moment. All his brain cells gathered in one, very remote place.

"Yeah Remy. I'm gonna give you that. I promise." He caught the still raised hands and guided Remy to turn around. Then he pressed his hands to the wet tiles and pushed Remy so that the lean thief was leaning, bent over, on the wall. His ass and graceful spine showed out to Logan's liking.

He had the brief urge to make a few slaps on those hard, rounded cheeks but held himself back. He wasn't sure what the kid would react. He wasn't going to scare him off. Yes, he would like to spank him, mark that pale flesh as his, but he didn't NEED it to get off.

Instead, he just stroked the arched back with long soothing moves murmuring soft words to the trembling thief.

"I'm gonna fill you up nice. Stretch that tight hole of yours, push you over the edge. I'm gonna fuck you deep and slow till you beg for release and only thing you will be able to feel will be my cock sliding in and out of you stretched body…"

Remy was trembling violently listening to the words coming out of Logan's mouth.

"Please…"

He moaned wishing he could move, force Logan to act! The words…merde… they were driving him insane. His cock jerked and swelled even more at the image Logan was painting in his mind. He FELT the pre-come dripping from the tip and desperately wished for some more stimulation. But all he got were soft strokes of that hard hand on his back, the hot water hitting him in thousand different places. He felt as if he could count each and every drop hitting his back. It was torture, pleasure… it was driving him completely insane. And there were words.

"But that won't be the end of it. You gonna cum and milk my cock with your spasming muscles but I will still be hard. I will not stop. Gonna shaft you, pound into you, thrust till you'll get hard again."

Logan's hand sneaked between Remy's tight ass cheeks and lightly stroked the cleft. His index finger ghosted over the tight rosebud of muscles and left. Remy moaned loudly – I'm gonna fuck you so good that you won't be able to walk from this shower on your own legs. – His finger returned to the arching ring of muscles and PRESSED. This time it was more slippery and Remy realized Logan had to lubricate it with something.

And suddenly the first digit was IN and Remy's legs gave up. He would have surely fallen to his knees if it wasn't for Logan who caught him and kept in place.

"But you know what boy?" Asked Logan pushing his thick finger deep into that hot, tight hole. "It still won't be the end."

Remy made some chocking, animal sounds and Logan pulled the finger out, only to thrust back – stronger this time in a faster pace. He kept one hand on the thief's back and watched his finger disappear into the small opening. He couldn't wait to get onto that tight, small ass. To feel the heat close over his shaft. But he couldn't hurt the boy either. The way he was thrashing told him, that Remy stood at the verge of soul-shattering orgasm. But it was still too soon. He once more reached to the boy's long cock and closed his hand over it, gripping the base strongly, forcing it to subside.

Remy gave out long, agonized cry and jerked suddenly. But Logan was strong, very strong and kept the boy in place easily.

"Hush boy, ya can't cum yet. You gotta wait. I haven't told ya what I'm gonna to do to ya when I take ya out of the shower."

"Logan, S'il vous plait, can't take it anymore, need to cum so badly… Logan…"

"No, listen. Listen to me boy."

Logan pulled his finger out and then pushed again in. But this time there were TWO fingers. Thick, stretching him, preparing. Hard, unyielding but all the time gentle and careful not to hurt him. Remy had to bite his lip until it bled to keep sane.

"I'm gonna take you to the bed and then force my still hard cock inside that hungry hole of yours. It would be nice, stretched and wet from my cum so I'll get it pretty easily."

Remy shut his eyes, squeezing tightly trying not to imagine it all. The two fingers stretching him, pushing in and out of him, scissoring him made him buck his hips, and the words… Mon Dieu how he wanted it.

"Then I'll roll ya on top of me and I'm gonna watch ya fuck yourself on my large tool. Watch myself disappear into that tight hole."

Remy couldn't stand it anymore. He sobbed. It was all too much. The fingers stretching him, the hand that still kept his cock imprisoned, denying him orgasm. Then he felt Logan pressing third finger. He screamed and rocked his hips desperate for more.

Logan grinned evilly and suddenly bent the fingers seeking and soon finding the sensitive numb he was seeking.

Remy made some chocking sounds and his vision swam momentarily when Logan massaged his prostate forcing him to feel such pleasure that it was nearly pain. He was babbling, not able to understand the meaning of words any more. He wasn't a young intelligent man anymore, just one desperate feeling. All he needed, all wanted right now was Logan's member deep inside of him.

"Hush boy, its okay, okay…" Logan soothed as he drew the fingers out. Remy whimpered, reduced only to small, animal-like sounds.

And suddenly Remy felt something much bigger than Logan's fingers at the entrance to his body. With a keening sound he spread his legs even further to encourage Logan to move. And there he was. He felt IT pressing, hard and demanding, at his anus, forcing his well lubricated hole to give up. And the first few inches pushed home forcing a loud groan from both of them.

"Does it hurt?" Asked Logan breathlessly, still vaguely aware of the need to be careful.

"Non… Oui… HARDER Logan… S'il vous plait, Logan, fuck me harder!"

"You sure?"

Remy didn't answer. Instead he just wriggled, pushed back impaling himself on that incredible rod, feeling himself being stretched to the edge of pain. His rectum forced to accept such a great intruder felt tight and sensitive.

Logan didn't need any more encouragement. He pulled out and then slammed back burying all that length and girth in him. Remy screamed. And then Logan let go of his cock. And that was all he needed to finally cum. He felt his cock spurt wave after wave of white seed from him and his muscles contracted forcefully, gripping Logan's tool with great strength. He heard Logan howl and slammed back into him with such a force that he was pushed onto wall with all his weight.

His legs gave up and he sank to his knees, still shaking from the most intense, powerful orgasm of his life. His lungs burned, his hole pulsated in time with his inner muscles clenching and unclenching around – Oh GOD! – still hard, convulsing member inside of him. His eyes were tightly shut, his hands rolled into fists and he was desperately trying to catch his breath.

Logan followed him to his knees, keeping the lean hips in a bruising grip and growling deep inside his chest with pleasure that only stimulated his hunger more. He watched the boy tremble and moan in powerful orgasm and felt himself go aroused by it again. His cock still hard filled the younger man's ass with spurts and spurts of come. The scent of pleasure and their scents mixed together playing havoc with his mind. He was barely keeping his feral side at bay.

Without any thought he leaned over the lean body and bite the graceful, exposed neck with his sharp canines, drawing blood.

Then he moved again, thrusting deep into that beautiful body again, watching as that hungry ass whole swallowed his member until his balls rested tightly against the cheeks and his curly, black pubic hair were pressing into that sensitive cleft.

He pulled out till only the tip of the head was still in the boy and then very, VERY slowly pushed in. The anus now loose, accepted him easily, so he took his time watching as inch by inch he disappeared into the boy's body.

Remy started babbling again without any sense, his lust-filled mind no longer working. After impaling Remy on his large cock at a maddeningly slow pace few more times he changed his position and now the thief screamed and sobbed at once, when all the length of the rock hard rod inside of him stroked the sensitive spot. His prostate was stimulated in such a way that was more than he could ever take and Remy thrashed under the older man, mumbling only his name.

Logan reached around their joined bodies and closed his callused hand over suddenly hard again member and fisted Remy roughly, matching his own, desperate rhythm. It didn't take long also. Remy's over stimulated body just gave up and he thrashed in second orgasm, and the next one that came over him right after the previous one melding into one unforgettable sensation.

His body felt as if on fire. His lungs ached for air and his vision was gone. He nearly lost consciousness but the forceful spasming of his body kept him awake, writhing and trashing under the bigger mans body.

All the time during Remy's orgasm, Logan didn't stop fucking him. Constant, fast and furious thrusts forcing that thick monster so deep inside the thief's body made him lose his voice.

Not bothering about Remy's contracting body. he slammed back and forth, in and out filling him completely, forcing his mind to accept that there was just one thing that mattered – that cock, that man behind him. Hard, punishing thrusts pinned him to the floor and then, Logan howled and came, filling his ass with even more cum.

Remy couldn't take it any more. He lost consciousness and went limp on the floor.

Remy regained consciousness at the sensation of callused hands washing him, massaging the soap into his highly sensitive skin. He felt completely boneless, satiated but there was strange, buzzing feeling somewhere in the back of his mind that could allow him to lay still. It made him restless, aroused.

Almost with terror Remy realized that his lust wasn't satisfied completely. He STILL wanted the strong man that was now cleaning him so gently. He opened his eyes and watched Logan from behind his lashes. Apparently he wasn't the only one that still wanted. He could clearly see Logan's erection jutting out into the air. Remy was surprised that it was at all possible. That man came two times in arrow and he wasn't soft even for a moment. Now when Remy thought about it, he remembered that the last thing he felt before he slipped into unconsciousness was the feeling of being impaled on that STILL rock hard monster.

"How…?" He asked watching the angry red head of the swollen member and a cleaned drop of pre-cum on its tip.

Logan looked into his glazed eyes and grinned wolfishly.

"Healing factor, remember? I can go on, and on…I can fuck ya with it all night and won't go soft even for a moment, no matter how often I come."

Remy couldn't decide if it was a promise or a threat. But there was no time for such thoughts because Logan had him clean in a matter of minutes and was now drying him with the soft towel. Suddenly Remy remembered all the thing Logan had promised him earlier. And if Logan promised… He shivered in anticipation, not sure if he was more afraid or more aroused.

He lowered his shields for a moment to FEEL Logan, to make sure that the warm feeling was still there and… yes, it was. Strong, stabile, unyielding like Logan himself, surrounding his soul with warmth and comfort. He knew that if he asked, Logan would back off.

Logan pulled him in the direction of the bedroom and Remy followed. He couldn't take his eyes of all those rippling muscles and that large member swaying with each move. H was fascinated by Logan's complete comfort with his nakedness.

* * *

Bobby was too caught up in his thoughts to notice the large, blue man sitting at the kitchen table. Hank, as usual had lost track of time and when he finally left the lab, it was already 1 am.

The sight of Bobby returning so late wouldn't be a surprise if it wasn't for the dark look in his face, the knitted brow and traces of blood on his tee-shirt. He had obviously been in a fight, because his clothes were slightly disheveled.

"Robert?" Asked Hank with concern.

Bobby nearly jumped out of his skin and whirled around to face his best friend. A large blue hand was holding the half-eaten sandwich. He stared at the genius and FELT the rise of his lust. All that soft fur… just the thought of it pressing into his naked skin made him hard and he fought for control.

"Do you need any medical help, my friend?"

"Huh?" His lust filled mind didn't process the question right away; instead, it concentrated on the sound of Hank's voice. "No… no. I'm OK."

"Can you tell me what happened?"

Bobby sighed and strode to the fridge. He opened the door and grabbed a bottle of beer.

"Alex broke up with me. Guess it couldn't be called a friendly break up by any means."

Hank was surprised by the bitterness in his young friend's voice. He couldn't remember ever seeing Bobby quite like that.

"What happened? Do you want to talk? Why has Alex left? I thought everything between you went well?"

The younger man just shrugged his shoulders never looking at Hank.

"Bobby…" Started Hank again. "You know you can tell me anything. We are friends and…"

"Yeah, friends!" Snorted Bobby with a strange undertone to his voice. He didn't know what came over him.

Hank grew more worried by every passing minute. Something was not right. Why had Bobby been acting so strange? Why was there so much
bitterness in his voice?

"Friends…" Repeated Bobby with dark amusement and suddenly started laughing.

And it was the sound of that strange laughter that caused Hank to freeze in mid-movement. Never had he heard something so "alien" and lacking happiness.

His young friend was always full of joy, he knew how to laugh, play, and was simply light spirited. His laughter was something Hank McCoy was pleased to hear.

However, the scary parody that came out of Bobby's throat made him feel uneasy. Forced him to see the Iceman as a grown up, bitter and hurting man.

The break up with Alex must have been more painful than Bobby wanted to admit.

"Talk to me my friend. I sincerely believe that it will help you ease the tension and see things in a different way."

"Hank, I don't think that this would be such a great idea."

"I know what I am saying. I have also had my share of break ups."

Bobby's eyes softened for a moment. Yes, he knew Hank had had his fair share of pain. It seemed that neither of them had much luck with a social life.

"I think its better left alone."

"No. Keeping emotions and problems inside does not help. It only makes them worse.'

Bobby thought about the last eight years of hiding his true feelings from Hank and snorted mentally.

"Eh…"

"Tell me Bobby. Maybe things can be straightened out between you and your boyfriend…"

Bobby had to laugh at that.

"No Hank. Nothing can help."

"Why? Why has he left you?"

"Because he fell in love with me."

Hank blinked. He had problems with understanding. Wasn't that supposed to happen?

"And…"

"And understood that I was in love with someone else."

Hank once more was completely lost.

"You mean you have met someone else?"

"No, I mean I was ALWAYS in love with someone else and that was why I could never love Alex the way he should be loved. "

"Oh Robert… why did you have to complicate things so badly? It only causes pain to everyone. Maybe you weren't in love with Alex but you surely cared about him. That was an immature decision."

"Immature?" Asked Bobby in sudden anger. "Immature?! For God's sake Hank, you are only few years older than me! Are you really so mature? Just because you are genius? Why does everyone treat me like a half minded, idiot kid?" Bobby shouted.

"Please wait. No one ever called you…"

"No, I am just the youngest x-men! I am the weaker one!"

"You forget that you MADE them believe it, by your behavior."

"So I like doing pranks. I like when people are smiling, not only brooding about Magneto or FoH or Sentinels or any bad guy we happen to meet. Does it really allow all of you to forget that I am 26 years old and have no less power than any of you? Hank, if we ever fought with our mutant powers I would have easily killed you before you even had the time to THINK about attacking me." All this he shouted straight into Hank's face not noticing that he turned into his Ice form again. "All I have to do it THINK and you would be no more that a lifeless block of ice."

"Robert…" Hank called mortified when the kitchen suddenly turned cold, the floor, the counter, chairs- all being covered with frost. "I am sick of it. I am not a child! I am, just like the rest of us, a well trained assassin!"

With his last words, in less then a heartbeat, the kitchen covered with thick ice. Before Hank had the time to react his feet were frozen to floor and his arms were caught in columns of ice. His fur protected him from cold but nevertheless he was immobilized. He tried to free himself, but even his mutant strength couldn't break the ice.

"It's no use Hank." said Bobby in deadly calm voice "it won't break or melt till I say so. Even Scott's blast won't break it for long. The ice would just melt and then reform."

Hank stared at him in surprise and… pride? Had Robert achieved such mastery in his powers only by himself?

"When did it happen Robert? Why haven't you told me? Is the ice structure…"

Bobby sighed partially amused by Hanks analytic mind. It was so much like him to start analyzing ice structure and forget that the ice was keeping him hostage. Partially terrified by his actions, he was in a strange mood, suddenly everything stopped mattering.

"You never asked with WHOM I was in love."

Hank, still covered in thin, flexible ice, looked up at the young man and stilled. His mind focusing on Bobby again. He wanted to ask Bobby to let him go, but something in those icy eyes stopped him.

"Robert…"

"It was you Hank. Always you. I knew I couldn't tell you… couldn't loose your friendship… as I tried to replace you by something else, but it never worked… never…"

As if he was hypnotized, not thinking about his actions, about tomorrow or any possible reaction. All that he wanted in that particular moment was to kiss Hank.

He turned back into his human form and leaned over the big, blue man frozen to the chair.

Hank gasped when Bobby's lips touched him – soft, slightly cold but getting warmer by the minute, tasting of winter.

Bobby moaned at the sheer pleasure of kissing HANK. He caught fistfuls of Hank's fur and leaned even closer, longing to feel more of Hank, taste more. It was probably his only chance.

Using Hank's surprise to his advantage he slipped his tongue past those sharp, long fangs and TASTED him, explored that hot cavern that was pure Hank.

He wasn't sure how long it lasted. Hours, delicious minutes or just mere seconds, but his mind suddenly kicked in and Bobby realized that he had immobilized Hank and was using his vulnerability. He jumped away from him, feeling his face go as red as possible. Terror and shame in his expression. For one eternal moment he stared into Hanks shocked eyes and then released the ice.

"I… I'm sorry… I… " He couldn't - just couldn't look into those soft, brown eyes. "please forgive me" he whispered and then, before Hank had the chance to react, dashed through the kitchen door and slipped into his ice form.

"Bobby!" Shouted Hank and ran out after him but Bobby was already sliding away from him, desperately wanting to hide from everybody's eyes, wishing the earth would open and swallow him.

* * *

Logan watched his utterly RELAXED lover sink into the bed with a loud sigh.

"Don't get so cozy Cajun. You know we ain't done yet. Not for a long, long time."

Remy cast him a sidelong glance from under his lashes. He still wasn't sure if he was more afraid or more excited by Logan's intention to make love to him all night long.

"Remy need a lil' break, Cher."

"Ok, so we will talk till you are rested."

"What do you want to talk about?"

"That girl in the tank."

Logan immediately smelled the change in Remy. Tension, wariness, even fear. "Why did you freak out like that?"

Remy wasn't relaxed anymore. He stood up and strode to the little table standing under the window. He seemed not to notice that he was completely naked. Although the room was dark, the curtains were open and there was enough light for Logan to see the gorgeous body of his lover clad only in moonlight. Long, lean limbs, muscles… broad chest, flat stomach. He was maybe too skinny, but still very attractive.

Logan tried to sort out the feelings that came over him. The strange, warm feeling he had experienced during their `shower' encounter was something new to him. It wasn't just pleasure. He has had enough lovers to be able to recognize that. No. It was a feeling that he never experienced before.

At least he didn't remember it.

But now, watching Remy walk through the room dressed only in his grace made his heart ache. As ridiculous as it may sound, he DID feel unsure at that moment. After all, the thief was young, beautiful… intelligent. He could have anyone he wanted. And he - lets face it - was just an old, screwed up ex-assassin that had his mind wiped so many times that he now became psi-zero. It meant that telepaths couldn't read him. He was like a person without a scent.

And he was much older than Remy. Older by any standards. What had he imagined starting all this? He wouldn't be surprised if the boy wanted to throw him out once he got bored. Remy was like a colorful bird and Logan was a wolf. They were no match, but still… Logan felt a strange longing to protect Remy, to be a part of his life from now on.

And if Remy wanted to get rid of him, he would have a surprise because he wasn't going to leave. Once he got the taste of that Cajun spice, he wasn't ever going to leave him alone.

Logan could almost physically feel how Remy was closing, shutting himself from Logan. His face, that minutes ago expressed sheer bliss and pleasure, was now straight, blank… poker mask that most of the x-men believed to be his real face.

"Tell me." He forced his voice to be as gentle as he could muster.

Remy looked at him for a brief moment, his eyes never betraying his thoughts, and then he looked away shrugging his shoulders.

"Remy…" He called out his name.

The thief refused to look at him. He snatched a cigarette from the package lying on the table and with a touch of his finger lit the cigarette, taking a deep drag.

"Why do you want to know, Cher?" The Cajun asked finally, staring at the red end of his cigarette.

Logan took a deep breath. He was never the one for personal talks.

"Because I care Remy. I smelled fear on you. I want to know what is in that girl that scares you so much?"

Remy still refused to look at him. Instead he stared into the black window, his thoughts wandering. He looked so lost and vulnerable right then, that Logan's heart ached.

"She no girl Logan." He said finally "Remy think she one of Sinister experiments. She was already der when Remy came. Always in dat tank. Always immobile. Always… scared Remy more dan anything on dis planet."

"Why? She doesn't look particularly threatening."

Remy's mouth twisted into a strange, mocking grin.

"But she is. De Phoenix, Cyclops, even de Professor… dey like children in comparison to her, mon ami. She de most powerful thing Remy have ever seen. But that isn't what scares the po' thief…"

"So what is?"

"She no human, Cher." Said Remy looking Logan straight in the eye "She has no mind, no emotion. Just a killer machine. Gambit never could read her. Like a black hole…" Remy stopped realizing he had said too much.

The sudden change in Logan's feelings hit him hard, because he felt so good with the older man that he allowed his shields to slip. And now he was paying the price.

"Yer an empath, aren't you?" said Logan calmly. Suddenly all the small, minor thing that he couldn't understand clicked into place. That surely did explain a lot of things.

"That was how you saved your life, isn't it Remy? Two days ago you turned my rage into lust…" Logan wondered aloud.

Remy lowered his head expecting a blow or a scream, something… anything. He knew the older man hated when people tried to play with his mind. He expected anger not… gratefulness?!

His head jerked up and he looked with a bewildered expression at the quickly approaching Logan. Why would he…?

"Thank you." Said Logan slowly. He stopped in front of the taller man and reached for his hands. Careful of still lit cigarette in the right one he entwined his fingers with the slender man in front of him and slowly pulled them up, so that he could pin them to the cold glass of the window. "Thank you."

"Fo' what?" whispered Remy, completely taken aback by the tenderness rolling off of Wolverine.

"For not letting me kill you. I couldn't stand it Remy… I wouldn't survive it."

Something in the older man made him look into the bright eyes for an answer. He KNEW Logan wanted to say something more, but he didn't dare to look deeper into the man's mind.

"Logan…?" He asked for…for what? He didn't know.

"I love ya, kid."

That short sentence, few words, made Remy's heart stop. He never noticed the cigarette fall from his hand and land on Logan's bare feet.

Logan hissed at the pain but didn't move, still pinning Remy to the window. When the thief noticed what had happened he wanted to move but Logan pressed him harder.

Neither of them spoke. They just stared into each others eyes, reluctant to break the silence.

Remy desperately wanted to believe Logan, to be able to respond to Logan with a matching declaration but… couldn't. After all what has happened he couldn't trust so easily. The whole idea was so new, so… crazy that he needed time to acknowledge it. but Logan didn't DEMAND anything from him. It took a moment for Remy to realize that Logan was simply offering himself. Not in exchange for something…just freely. Logan left it to Remy to accept or reject the offer.

"I…"

Logan could easily smell the uncertainty and hesitation on the young man so didn't push. Although the beast inside him roared, needing instant and total acceptance, the man that was Logan subdued the beast.

"Hush boy… you don't have to answer right away." Logan soothed the troubled thief and stepped back giving him space once again.

"Tell me about that girl, what's her power?"

Remy fought for his breathing to even out. He didn't want to show how much Logan's admission had affected him.

"She… her name is Sever. Gambit heard rumors dat Sinister couldn't control her so he left her in de tank."

"Have you seen her fight?"

"Oui." He shivered remembering the lab and all the painful things Sabertooth did to him. He prayed Logan never knew that. God only knew how he would react to knowing that Creed actually fucked Remy.

"And…?"

"She… she has some kind of control over energy. She sucks it off from things."

"- Things?"

"Oui." Does it till the molecular structure breaks and it jus' stops to exist. Disappear. Remy seen her do a hole in man's chest only by touching it."

"So she has to come close?"

"Non. She can also shoot balls of her own energy… but basically she is jus' surrounded by an aura of white energy. And if she touches anything wit dat… it's over. No boom, nor any other sound. Jus' simple… death."

That wasn't everything. Logan knew it. Not about Sever but things probably related to her. Because the sudden stench of fear that filled the room had to have a source. And Logan was determined to know it. But not now. The thief was tense, restless and looked as if he could bolt any second.

That was enough of talking this night. Right now Logan needed to relax the boy, and maybe make love to him some more. Yeah… that was a good idea.

"Come here" He growled softly, making sure Remy heard the affection in his voice. The younger man seemed more skittish than a wild horse. From open passion, through vulnerability to ice cold. Logan finally admitted to himself that he and the boy were more alike than anyone thought. If needed, they could close like an oyster.

Remy looked at him speculatively. Logan could almost HEAR the kid trying to think out his intentions. Both of them had lost interest in bed exercises and Remy still had problems with accepting Logan's words. It was a long time since somebody said they loved him. A very, very long time since it was truth.

Finally, although uncertain, Gambit moved. He approached the stocky man slowly, carefully. Somewhere in the back of his mind something screamed to him to be careful. Logan was known for his aggression and unpredictability. With such a feral soul one should always be careful. He shouldn't let go of his shields. Should… ~Non!~ he admonished himself. He had to stop that line of thinking. If he never gave this relationship a chance, it was already finished. He was never a coward, never backed off from a challenge. He was a gambler for a God's sake! He NEEDED to take his chances.

The evening started so well… he was happy. Not only during the best, mind blowing sex of his life but the warm feelings coming off of Logan, they made him feel loved, cherished and wanted. They healed him. He didn't want to loose it because he had problems with his memories.

"What do you want to do, Cher?" Asked Remy summoning a small, sensual smile on his lips. His empathy told him that Logan's desire hadn't lessened a bit. The man still wanted him. And although Remy wasn't really in the mood he was going to do everything to make this moment last. Maybe he didn't love Logan, maybe he did… but he surely didn't want to loose him.

Logan looked right through the young thief's game. His heart ached when the realization hit him. Remy was such a selfless person. He would do ANYTHING not to hurt a friend. Sacrifice himself without a second thought. Logan only now understood, remembered how many times Remy had risked his own life, in what seemed like a foolish attempt, to make sure that none of the x-men would be threatened.

And he wasn't given a chance.

Logan watched the lanky thief approach him with his natural grace and swallowed hard thinking about how much the kid has suffered. His attempt to soothe Logan by offering his body, even when he really didn't want it, was proof of how badly he was treated in the past.

His sexual conquests were probably just a desperate attempt to find someone who would want him. If only for a moment.

When the auburn haired man was close enough Logan reached out a hand and brushed a stray hair behind his ear.

"Relax…" he whispered softly and pulled the taller man down for a kiss. Remy surrendered to Logan's lips. Without any coaxing, he opened his mouth allowing the other man's tongue inside.

The Canadian immediately felt the total surrender of the thief and the beast inside him howled in pleasure and desire. That was one of the things able to turn him into a feral state. But he refused to allow it to happen.

"Lay on your stomach" He said gently pushing the taller man towards the bed.

Still apprehensive, but hiding it, Remy complied not sure what would happen. He felt the yellow eyes watching him as he stretched on the white, cold sheets, his naked behind displayed to Logan's liking.

"Good boy…" said Logan with an edge to his voice. Then he climbed on the bed and knelt beside the thief. When Remy wanted to raise his head and look at the older man, Logan put a rough, callused hand to his neck and held him down.

"No. Don't move. Lay completely still."

Remy swallowed hard but nodded his head. He trusted Logan not to hurt him. He really did – that surprised him probably more than Logan.

Logan straddled the narrow hips and leaned over the boy's back to reach the drawer of the night stand. He felt Remy tense even more beneath his thighs but didn't comment on it. He never was much of a talker.

He opened the drawer and fumbled through the items there. The first small bottle he found was lubricant. He looked at it, feeling his own member stir at the image in his mind and then with a loud sigh put it back ~later~ he thought to himself. He searched little more and finally found what he smelled earlier – a bottle of massage oil.

With a satisfied grunt he straightened and poured some of the slippery, cold liquid on the boy's back.

Remy hissed at the cold and shuddered. He was taken aback by Logan's actions. He suspected Logan was searching for the lube but why pour it onto his back? And then he finally SMELLED the orange and mint fragrance. The massage oil. "What…?"

"Shh… just relax. I'm gonna give you a nice, long back rub. Yer too tense to be useful." He added gruffly but it didn't overshadow the tenderness of his actions.

Assured that Logan wasn't going to fuck him immediately, Remy finally relaxed, burying his face in the smooth pillow. Soon he felt Logan's strong fingers dig into his tense muscles. He groaned and cherished the feeling of being cared of.

Logan massaged him hard but knowingly. He obviously had done it earlier. Soon his neck was as soft as butter and the oil was warm from their body heat. The smell of the liquid and sound of the older man's even breathing put his mind on ease.

When the hands moved lower, kneading his back and then lower back he started purring. He felt SO good. Nearly on the verge of sleep. But there was still that buzzing in the back of his mind – His and Logan's passion, desire for each other – that kept him awake. When Logan worked his back, his member again started hardening.

Even if Logan smelled the pheromones, he didn't comment on it. His touch also didn't change. There was more care and warmth than passion and that made Remy really feel SAFE. He always had problems with male lovers dominating him, pinning him to the ground. Too many memories…

He murmured something in French when Logan hit a particularly tender spot. The Canadian couldn't stop touching and kneading all those muscles. Now, so very close to the thief, he noticed that his unbelievable agility was probably a result of his mutation. The kid had muscles in his back that humans just DID NOT have.

When the skin was warm and pink from the massage, Logan noticed something that was hidden from his gaze earlier. When he watched the kid earlier he wasn't so warm and his skin was pale porcelain. Now, however, when the blood came close to surface Logan noticed ugly scars running through Remy's back and buttocks. He knew these kinds of scares. They were created by a belt hitting flesh so hard it cut the skin and crushed the tissues.

He also noticed that the lower he got, the uglier the scars were. The white stripes were so thickly covering the lower back and buttock that Logan winced mentally. The kids flesh must have look like one big wound. The skin was nearly scratched off from the buttocks. These kinds of wounds were inflicted to cause the most possible pain, but not to kill. It probably took months for the kid to heal. He wondered who did it. There was something so very familiar in the cruelty of the scars… it was on the tip of his tongue… just out of reach.

He moved lower, still massaging the soft skin and then saw the worst scars. The inner and back thigh of the kid was crisscrossed by very deep scares. It must have hurt like all hell. Whoever did this to him, knew how to inflict pain. And it DID seem very familiar.

Remy stirred, his empathy picking up on emotional distress. Logan quickly cleared his mind from the dark thoughts and concentrated on kneading those fine, well sculptured thighs instead.

And when he was ready to ask Remy to turn around he finally understood what caught his eye. The scars looked familiar because he had seen very alike wounds on a young girl. A girl that was tortured, raped, and killed by Sabertooth. Creed must have done the same to Remy. The wave of hate and anger rising in him was so great that for a brief moment he went feral but a second later he regained control. He vowed to find Creed and rip his stinking heart out.

He stroked the already fading scares with the tip of his fingers and leaned to kiss them. Remy stirred and then suddenly went rigid. He understood that Logan was kissing his scars!

"Logan…"

"Shh… kid. Don't worry" And he meant it. He would protect the kid for the rest of his life. He also understood the reason for the fear in Remy. He was afraid Logan would accuse him, blame him for being hurt by Creed. "I won't hurt ya… and Creed won't ever again either."

Remy moved so fast that Logan barely had the time to straighten up when he came nose to nose with a very shocked thief.

"How do you know?"

"I know Creed. I've seen him do the same to somebody else."

Remy averted his gaze. His memories forced into his mind and he suddenly felt cold again.

Cold and lonely.

Logan moved to the side and wrapped his arms around the tall man.

"Tell me."

"Non."

"Why not? I think I already know what happened. Now I want to know how it happened so I won't do somethin in the future that may scare
ya."

Remy trembled. Tell or not to tell? He was terrified by Logan's intelligence, ability to associate facts, and his knowledge. Everybody considered him half animal, feral mutant that hardly could control himself. But it wasn't the truth. Logan was tender, careful and had the best self-control Remy has ever seen. Even feral, in that damned room after the mission, he was gentle with him. In his own, rough way he was careful and certainly didn't want to hurt him intentionally.

Remy decided to take a chance.

"You don't know, Cher… it was far worse."

"Why? Tell me."

Remy looked into bright, true eyes and accepted the silent comfort. Of all the others, Logan was the one to understand what it means to have your free will taken from you.

"Sinister… he wanted Gambit to use de Charm on Sever to wake her and control her."

"Charm?"

"It goes from Gambits empathy. It has strictly sexual nature. Whoever is hit with it will be crazy from want, horny… for Remy. Sinister helped Remy invent shields that protect him, from other people's emotions. If I drop them to read somebody, Remy allows de Charm to flow freely. No control over it. Never was." he said bitterly. "But Remy was scared of Sever more than of Sinister. So he refused. Remy never knew Sinister wanted dat…" Remy closed his eyes.

And he told Logan everything - about the lab, Sinister's control over his body, other men watching, Sabertooth beating him till he was wet from his own blood and then raping him. The other men abusing him as well. And about Severs awakening and his 3 day absence.

All the time he was clinging to the warm arm surrounding him like it was the last stable thing in his life. Logan wasn't sure what was stronger in him. Hate for Sinister? Creed? Or the need to soothe the younger man. In the paleness of his cheeks, he saw how much it cost him to tell Logan the whole truth.

"It's OK. I am here. I will protect you. No one will hurt ya kid. No one."

Remy felt tears coming but didn't want them. He pressed hard into Logan's hot chest and whispered:

"Make love to Remy, Cher?"

"Yer sure you want it? You'll be very sore tomorrow."

Remy smiled softly. He loved the care.

"Oui. Remy sure."

Logan traced Remy's jaw line with his thumb.

"I love you Remy… really do" he whispered as if to himself. And then leaned to kiss the thief.

~Merde~ thought Remy. If Logan only knew what those words did to him! Something deep inside of him that was cold for a long, long time
finally started getting warm.

Remy opened his mouth allowing Logan inside, allowing him to taste, take, posses. It was one of the things he desired the most. But now he wanted to touch. Earlier in the shower he didn't really have a choice. Logan took the lead and did it great. But now… now Remy wanted to touch that hard, beautiful body without scars.

Gently he coaxed Logan to let him into HIS mouth. Hot like a furnace tasted of purely Logan and Remy whimpered softly causing Logan's cock to throb painfully. He loved the sounds that the kid made.

Logan felt the change in his lover. No longer shy or uncertain, Remy tried to take control. Everything of Logan screamed NO! He could not subdue, even at the slightest rate. All his instincts told him that it was he who should dominate but the human inside of him again pushed the beast inside. He knew that Remy needed this. Needed the assurance that he also could be in control. And he was curious what the kid would do?

Slowly he allowed Remy to take the lead in kissing, and tried to enjoy the thrusting, agile tongue that seemed to search his mouth for something. He groaned when Remy pushed harder forcing Logan to lie back on the bed that smelled of his lover.

Grinning wickedly Gambit broke the kiss and straddled the older mans lap, his hands on Logan's shoulders supporting him, as he started to move his hips slightly forward and backward, causing the erect member to touch the cleft between his tight ass cheeks. The red on black eyes held the golden gaze when he pressed a little stronger, forcing the cock to slid between the cheeks and touch the sensitive cleft. He saw the tightness in Logan's features, the snarl that he didn't manage to bite back.

"You're hard again, Cher? So fast…"

"Remy…" Warned Logan. He never liked being teased. But, he liked doing it to his lovers, just not the other way round.

"Don't worry Cher, Remy gonna take care of you… real good care…"

He said suddenly moving. Logan groaned at the loss of friction but didn't have the chance to start complaining because the kid moved lower and suddenly he felt that hot mouth GLUED to his hard, sensitized nipple. The boy sucked hard. No delicate teasing, only raw lust that was just the thing Logan needed. His back arched and his hands tangled in that unbelievably soft hair.

His hands were also moving. Touching, gripping, and scratching at his hot flesh making his senses wild. It seemed that Remy knew EXACTLY what he needed, wanted, liked the most and did it. His lips moved between both hard numbs sucking and occasionally biting. Sometimes so hard that he could taste the blood.

Remy moved lower, allowing his tongue to brush past that tick carpet of curly hair and found Logan's bellybutton. And he started tormenting it. Allowing his wet tongue to drop inside and lick around. Scratching it with his teeth and when Logan moaned loudly he bit hard and fast feeling Logan's body jerk upwards and his large cock press into his stomach.

He ground his belly harder into that incredibly thick tool. Logan growled appreciatively at the increased friction and Remy felt a trace of pre-cum smeared on his soft skin from the tip of Logan's member.

Tasting the curly, pubic hair he lowered himself till the straining cock was just mere inches from his mouth. He could feel his mouth watering at the sight. The angry red, swollen, mushroom head just SCREAMED for attention, and the thick rod, with pulsating veins under the thin, highly sensitive skin just begged for his touch. So he bent and licked one of those needy veins from the base to the tip of Logan's member. A short, choked howl escaped from Logan's chest

He repeated the action, enjoying the way Logan's thighs tensed and his body arched a little bit.

"Quit it Cajun!" Growled the frustrated Canadian.

Remy grinned and then opened his mouth wide and swallowed all of Logan's hard cock, relaxing his throat and letting it slide deep, very deep.

"Jesus Christ!" screamed Logan when that heat engulfed him whole. He opened his eyes and looked the beautiful creature lying between his legs with his throat unnaturally thick, full of his cock and couldn't restrain himself. With a loud howl he came spurting his come deep into the thief's throat.

Somewhat surprised by Logan's reaction Remy struggled to swallow, milking that cock even more. Finally he had to back off to breathe. When the wet cock finally slipped from between his lips he noticed that it was STILL hard.

"Merde." He said quietly – nothing can satiate dat man!

Still panting, Logan looked at the flushed thief and grinned. He was still in for a ride. He gripped the back of Remy's head and pulled him up for a kiss. Their lips met. Logan quickly thrust his tongue in wanting to taste himself on the spicy essence that was Remy.

The thief moaned and closed his eyes allowing Logan do whatever he liked. His own erection straining and aching for the touch. He was so caught up in the taste of the older man that he never heard the sound of the drawer opening and closing.

The next thing he noticed was Logan's hands sliding down his back, gripping his ass cheeks, massaging them and sliding along the cleft. One thick finger found the puckered, slightly swelled hole and pushed IN.

Remy whimpered and Logan growled forcefully feeling the heat.

"Yer still slick…" he whispered heatedly, never leaving the younger mans lips "Wet inside… from my come. Like I told you…"

Remy shivered at the dark, husky voice and rubbed his body on the Canadian. He pushed his hips back, forcing more of that finger inside him. The pain/pleasure taking him high, very high.

Then he heard a "pop" sound and a second later TWO cold, slicked fingers coated in the lube pushed inside.

He gripped Logan's shoulders forcefully and hid his face in his chest. It was too much. His vision swam when Logan found his prostate and stroked it slowly.

"Logan… Logan… S'il vous plait! T'encule –moi… please…" He started babbling feeling the fingers slide slowly in and out and hearing Logan describe to him what it felt like inside of him. "Please Logan… can't take in no more… please…" he begged nearly sobbing. His muscles tensing and relaxing spastically.

"Do you remember what I told you? You have to do it yourself…" Said Logan in quiet, strong voice. Although he was the one on bottom, it was still him who was in charge.

Remy straightened up, now kneeling over Logan's lap and whimpered at the sensation. Logan still had two fingers inside him and still was thrusting them slowly, hitting his sweet point every time.

With shaking hands Remy reached to the bottle of lube and squeezed some on the palm of his hand and reached to grab that throbbing cock. They both moaned when Remy started coating it. He wanted to make it last, to torment Logan like he was doing it but then his lover pushed a THIRD finger inside his swelled hole and he couldn't stand it anymore.

"Now… S'il vous plait, now!" demanded the frustrated thief.

"You must do it yourself" said Logan guiding the lean hips into position. "Do it slowly. I wanna watch as you impale yourself on my thick cock. Wanna see your tight hole swallowing it inch by inch."

Almost sobbing Remy started to lower himself. First he felt the swelled head at the entrance of his body. Without hesitation he pressed down, forcing the thick head inside. They both groaned loudly as it easily slipped into the boy's body.

"Yeah… good boy…" Praised him Logan, touching his straining erection. "Now be still for a minute. I wanna watch ya."

Remy whimpered desperately. He wanted that WHOLE cock inside him. But still he complied and froze with only the head inside and his muscles straining to keep the position.

"Good… Oh God Remy yer so beautiful!" Logan pulled the thief in for a kiss and in a matter of a heartbeat rolled them so that Remy was on his back and Logan was kneeling between his legs, still only the head of his throbbing erection in the boy. He moved the long, lean legs over his shoulders.

Remy moaned, trashing and rolling his head on the pillow, babbling incoherently. Logan leaned over him and captured his lips forcing the thief to concentrate only on him. And then, when his tongue thrust into the hot cavern of Remy's mouth, he thrust, pushing all he way in.

Remy screamed and gripped Logan's shoulders in bruising grip. Logan didn't stop. He slipped out almost all the way and then slammed back again and again listening to screams and moans from his Cajun lover.

It didn't take long for both of them. Suddenly they were thrashing, howling and screaming their pleasure. Remy's shields gave up and he sent his whole orgasm into Logan's mind and took his inside. The mad circle of pleasure almost drove Remy out of his mind. When his orgasm finally subsided he felt a heavily panting Logan lying beside him, holding him, stroking his hair and murmuring soft words.

He sighed, feeling happy and relaxed and quickly fell asleep. He never noticed when Logan got up and went for the bathroom. Neither did he wake up when Logan cleaned him carefully and then spooned behind him, pulling the thief's body into a protective embrace.



Chapter 7

Remy woke up to the sound of his cell phone. He was surprised to see Logan still soundly asleep. The older man HAD to hear it.

Remy just kept staring at the muscular, heavily tanned arm that lay across his stomach, connecting to the equally compact body spooning behind him.

Only now did he remember all the things that happened yesterday. He actually felt a little blush to creep up his face at the memory of their "shower". He never knew Logan could be such a hot, wicked lover. He imagined the older man would be more forward in his desires, blunt maybe, a bit animalistic in his desire to claim his mate. But the words and the complete control that Logan took over him showed him another, much more sophisticated side of his lover.

When he moved a little he FELT the remnants of the previous night. He was sore, but it was a nice feeling. Reminded him of the passion he shared with Logan, the infamous Wolverine. He pressed back into the warm body behind him and sighed contentedly when Logan instinctively tightened his grip around him.

"Will you take that fucking call?" Snarled Logan from under his pillow. He wasn't a morning person and wanted to sleep. And that constant "ring, ring" was driving him mad.

Remy felt the irritation coming from his feral lover and rose quickly from the bed, wincing a little at the soreness in his backside. He was sure that if he didn't answer the phone, Logan would do something harsh and definite.

"Allo?" He asked, heading out of the bedroom not wanting to disturb his lover's sleep and partially not ready to face him yet.

"Husband?" Asked a cold, controlled voice from the other side of the line.

"Bella?"

"Get out of t'ere."

"What?"

"Sever escaped Sinister's labs right after y' visit. She is after you."

After that he heard the constant sound meaning Belladonna had disconnected. He stood in the door to the bathroom, naked and stared at the phone.

That surely wasn't good information. Nor the beginning of the day. He hoped things would get better. Probably being inside the Mansion was his best defense. Its security system would very quickly detect any intruder. So Sever shouldn't be able to get him here. Anyway he figured he still had few days until she tracked him down.

At least he hoped so…

Remy decided to take a quick shower and go to the Mansion for food. Logan would undoubtedly be hungry when he got up and Remy really wanted to do something nice for the man.

Logan made him feel loved and wanted and he really missed those feelings. They were rare in his past.

He remembered the strong arms that held him while he was spilling his guts about what happened in Sinister's labs.

Remy felt bad that he didn't say to Logan that he loved him also but… bust something told him hold back. He just couldn't. He felt something for to older man, but was it love? He wasn't sure. He didn't know if he wanted to expose his heart for more suffering.

* * *

Logan woke up when the kid left. He heard him mutter something about food so he figured that Remy went to the mansion's kitchen to find something to eat.

Boy, was he hungry!

He got up and dressed in his faded jeans. He smiled remembering how they looked yesterday evening.

Still grinning he left the bathroom and headed for the bedroom, but something caused him to stop. He was sure he could smell something just couldn't recognize WHAT.

Logan sniffed once more. He could definitely smell something new in the surrounding. Long years of combat training and barely remembered past caused him to act on instinct.

His claws sprung out of its shielding without a sound while he crept slowly and silently towards the bedroom. The scent was stronger here but still, he couldn't categorize it, didn't know what he smelled.

The doors were open, just like he left them, very slowly he entered the room. What he saw stopped him in his tracks.

White, long hair first made him think about Storm but… it wasn't her. She smelled differently. A young woman stood in the center of the room, her back to him. She didn't move and Logan thought that she didn't notice him.

She was dressed in simple jeans and white tee shirt. Her body long and lean, but not as hot as Storm's or Jean's. She looked more like a teenager. But what disturbed Logan mostly was her scent. Or lack of thereof. She smelled only of washing powder which was probably used in her clothes, but nothing more. Usually Logan could easily smell other people's emotions, but she was a mystery.

"Hey!" He called taking an offensive stance.

She didn't jump or show any other reaction. Finally she turned around to face the half naked man with deadly claws sticking out from his hands. He wasn't a threat to her.

What surprised Sever was the fact that she reacted to him. Seeing him only half clothed caused something inside her stomach to twitch. Her ADB recognizing the chemical reaction of her body as nerves.

24 hours ago she wouldn't be able to feel that. Every minute spend outside the lab caused her mind to mutate once more. Minute by minute she was becoming more human, or mutant. She was AWARE of herself not only the machine.

She was also aware of her mission and WHO she was. Only few hours back, she fell asleep and it all came back to her.

Logan sucked a breath in when he saw her face. It was the girl from the tank. He was surprised to see her yellow eyes. Funny, but they reminded him of Remy.

"You are Sever." He growled low in his throat. Remy was afraid of her, so his duty was to protect the kid.

"He's not here. Ya won't get him… not when I'm here."

Sever cocked her head sensing the lack of logic in the sentence.

"Remy LeBeau is much more powerful than you." She said in a flat voice, her face expressing slight confusion. "You are no danger to me."

"Oh yeah? Lets see…" He launched himself on her with speed that always surprised his opponents, but not her.

He was really taken aback by her reaction. She just stood there, not trying even the slightest movement.

Logan raised his hand aiming at her arm. When the claws were millimeters from her flesh, nearly cutting, something happened.

In an instant she was surrounded by a white nimbus of energy and Logan felt incredible pain shoot through his body and he was thrown away with a force that knocked the wind out of his lungs.

"What the hell?!" Growled Logan, when he shook his head to clear his thoughts.

What surprised him the most, was the lack of any sound. There was no explosion, nor any other sign of what have happened.

He stood up and watched as the nimbus surrounding her grew. The energy touched the table that stood on her way and it just… disappeared?! A minute later he heard a loud CRACK when the table collapsed, because one of its legs ceased to exist.

Understanding that hand-to-hand combat would be of no use, he looked around in search of another weapon. He had a sickening feeling that it would be useless. She was too strong for him. The only chance he could harm her was to get her close enough to his claws to cut. But he couldn't. That fucking aura of energy seemed to disintegrate anything that was in her way.

He lifted a heavy, old chair and threw it at her. He expected the instinctual reaction – to dodge but it never happened. She still advanced her with her steady walk, behaving as if she never saw the big furniture flying straight at her head.

And it just… disappeared. Wolverine still couldn't believe what he was seeing. Part of him claimed that it was just impossible. Things could not just disappear. They could be destroyed – then there were always remnants – or they could be relocated. Nothing disappeared in nature. Nothing.

"Stop fighting. I do not wish to kill you." Her flat, oblivious voice was totally unnerving.

"Fuck off, bitch!" Snarled an enraged Logan. All his senses screamed that he was in danger, that he should back off, but his feral nature just couldn't let him.

Logan grabbed the nearest furniture and threw at her. If only she focused on it not on him, he would be able to wound her. But no such luck. All he achieved was slight frown on her face.

"You will go with me." She finally said, turning to the door.

Logan watched the slim figure with disbelief.

Yer crazy! Why would I do that?" He almost laughed. Almost.

For the first time he saw her face change expression. Slight smile curved her lips when she raised her hands.

Her palms started glowing and suddenly the glow separated from her flesh and hovered inches above it. It started growing, forming a large ball. Then it floated higher and separated into maybe a dozen of smaller, identical balls of energy.

They were beautiful. Small and shining, floating lightly. Then one of the balls came closer to Wolverine. He stared at it not sure what it was for. It stopped few inches away from his bare chest and just… hovered there. Then the others moved, circling him. Some of them were moving so fast that he had troubles to see them, some floated leisurely around him. There was no heat coming off of them.

"Come." Said the girl and he growled once more.

And that was his mistake. Before he had the time to react one of the balls touched his skin. The pain was worse than anything he had ever known. Like he was being eaten alive. Although the wound was shallow, he stared at it with disbelief. There was a shallow hole in his biceps! His body was already healing, patching the skin and muscles together but still… suddenly he realized what those little balls were for.

One prodded him in the back and instinctually he jumped forward, trying to avoid the pain. When he tried to hit the ball, they escaped his arms.

The girl reached the door and looked at him. Logan still refused to go with her so she just turned around and left. In the same moment two balls touched his bare back. He howled in pain and jumped forward.

Growling curses and sheathing his claws, he followed the white haired girl. She left the boathouse and directed straight into the woods. He wondered how she managed to avoid Cerebro. It was, after all the best security system ever! And Jean or Betsy? Why haven't they detected the intruder?

He remembered what Remy said about Sever. She had no mind.

"Great. What the fuck am I gonna do?" He wondered aloud. He wasn't sure if the girl heard him or not, because she still walked ahead not turning around. Normally, it would be a very stupid thing to do, but those fucking balls were leading him like he was on leash.

And the pain from the contact was enough to force him not to struggle.

They walked for about an hour and Logan noticed that the girl hadn't tired or even broken a sweat. Her breathing was even and she still had no scent.

"What do you want?" He asked when they finally reached a large cave. He knew this place from his hunts. It was well hidden and remote from the house.

She entered the dark cave and instantly was surrounded by a shining nimbus of white energy. She pointed him to one of the corners.

"Stay there. If you will not try to leave the area, the guardian will leave you alone. However, at the first attempt of escape they will aim for your knees. I know about your healing power, so the guardians are programmed to stay in your legs until I call them back."

Logan shivered when he imagined the pain it must cause. He was almost defenseless against her. When Remy told him that Sever was so powerful, he didn't believe. Now he regretted that.

"What do you want?" He asked again trying to sound calm.

"Remy LeBeau." She answered him, sitting on the ground in a meditating position and closing her eyes.

Logan's hearing stilled. The wave of fear that came over him nearly caused him to loose his breath. He desperately wished that Remy escaped. He was afraid that Sever would kill Remy.

"Why?" He asked once more.

She opened her strange yellow eyes with vertical pupils and watched Logan for a very long time. She enabled her ADB and her built in sensors started checking Logan out. She noted the rapid breathing, adrenaline… blood pressure. He was worried, afraid… and those symptoms occurred only after her mentioning of LeBeau. And she did find him in his bedroom.

"Why are you so worried about Remy LeBeau?" She asked, cocking her head to one side.

Logan snarled and then answered.

"The kid never wronged ya, once ya even saved him. Why do ya want to kill him now?"

"I do not wish to kill him. I just want him here."

"What for?"

She didn't answer him. Just closed her eyes and stilled. Sooner or later Remy LeBeau would find this place, and her mission would be over.

* * *

Remy had already filled the bags and was almost ready to head to the Boathouse. All the time he was thinking only about Logan.

The older man had declared his love yesterday and Remy had not. Now, after an hour of turning it over and over in his head he decided that if was foolish. And cruel. Logan deserved to know the truth, know that Remy did FEEL strongly about him. He still wasn't sure if it was love but it certainly was something. He decided go back to the boathouse and tell Logan everything.

He closed the fridge and turned to leave when his empathy detected a hostile presence.

Warren.

"Look what we got here." Said Warren mockingly. " Is it a thief? Is it a whore? Is it a faggot? No! It's a traitor!"

Remy turned around to look at the elegantly dressed man. His dark blue eyes showed as much hate and derision as he felt. Remy swayed, attacked both ways – verbally and empathically.

His gift allowed him to feel other people emotions no mater how well he was shielded. That was why he recently avoided other inhabitants of the mansion. His mental shields weren't strong enough to protect him from such an onslaught of hatred.

"Oh Gambit is shocked! Such an imagination… is dat all you can come up with by yourself? He spat out through his thickening accent.

Angel's eyes narrowed when he realized the thief had managed to affront him.

"You should keep your mouth closed thief, as I am concerned you should have stayed where we left you. No one wants a traitor in this house. Believe me, we all wished you dead!"

Remy shivered. The hatred and… belief… in Warren's voice cutting him deep, hurting him more.

"Well… none of y' is perfect… Death." Remy called him the name he was using as a horseman of Apocalypse. And the shot was good. With bitter
satisfaction Remy watched the winged mutant take a step back.

"But I didn't lead a band of killers to slaughter innocent children and women, defenseless… Rouge should have MADE sure you were really dead when she left you in Antarctica!" Shouted Warren when he regained his balance.

"Speak for yourself." A cool, controlled voice cut it.

Storm approached from the corridor. Her eyes pale silver, just an inch from becoming completely white with rage.

"None of us wanted you dead." She said softly turning to Remy. "And you Warren, stop blaming Remy for things that didn't concern him."

"Because of him, I lost my wings!"

"No. You were captured by Marauders and tortured by them, but your wings could have been saved if it wasn't for your so called friend. It wasn't Remy's fault."

Remy watched wide eyed as Storm protected him from Warren with a passion that she rarely showed.

"He gathered that band of killers!"

"Sinister would have done it with or without Remy's help. I advise you to be more careful about judging others." The threat in her voice was clear. "Or there may come times when the team may decide that YOU also aren't worth saving."

There was a long, deafening silence.

"I should have figured out that you would defend that stray you dragged here." He spat out and dashed from the kitchen, slamming door behind him.

Remy stared at the white haired goddess in front of him and tried to understand what happened.

"Why…?" He asked finally.

Storm averted her eyes.

"Yesterday… the things I said, way I said it was unforgivable. I shouldn't have ever behaved like that. I really believe you are a good person Remy, it is just… I cannot understand how you EVER could work for Sinister. You are such a loving person and he… he is a monster."

"He saved Gambit's life Chere… Remy never knew. Can you forgive me?"

She looked briefly at him.

"I have forgiven you already. But I am not sure if I could ever forget." She said quietly.

Remy felt stinging in his eyes. He never thought he would get so much from her. After yesterday, he was convinced there was nothing to be saved between them anymore.

"What Remy said yesterday… y' still Gambit's friend?" He asked, his voice a little shy. God knows how much he loved his little Stormy.

"Yes Remy. We are still friends. We just need time for things to settle down."

He only nodded, his heart filled with hope one more time. Things seemed to look better this morning.

"Now go back to Logan, he might get jealous."

As far as he was concerned, he couldn't remember the last time he had blushed so furiously.

" Uh… how…?" He never, EVER was shy of his relationships, so why couldn't he utter a word? Where had his famous wit disappeared to?

"I had the security duty last night. I saw you come from that… ride."

Remy finally smiled, his face transforming so utterly, that Storm lost her breath for a moment. Only now did she realize how SAD Remy had been lately. He hardly ever smiled and never so openly and honestly.

"Ah… dat ride!" Then he sobered. "Are you alright with it, Cher?"

"Of course I am. But I should warn you about Scott's reaction."

"Is de Fearless Leader homophobic?" Asked a surprised Remy. This was so NOT like the ideal, poster boy Scott.

"His reaction may come from his past experiences. He had…a… difficult childhood. A large part of it, he spent in the orphanage. Don't take it personally if he doesn't approve."

"Don' worry Stormy. Dis ol' thief listens to no one beside himself." The unspoken ANYMORE hung heavily.

"Remy should go."

"Take care Remy."

He smiled at her again and left still smiling.

He entered the Boathouse and left the supplies on the kitchen counter. He decided to wake Logan up and tell him what he was feeling. Although he didn't REALLY believe that Logan loved him, he still wanted a chance.

His mind knew that everything LOGAN did was a proof of his love but inside his heart he was still uncertain.

Still smiling he entered the bedroom and his smile faded.

The room was a complete mess. Furniture was broken. And the feeling that came off of it. Remy's empathy allowed him to feel traces of strong emotions in rooms or places. Here he felt anger and… fear.

He swallowed hard when he realized it was LOGAN'S fear. What happened to the older man that scared him? He was one of the bravest, almost crazy people he knew. But that wasn't the only thing he saw.

He was an energy converter. His ability to charge objects was affecting him in other ways also. He was able to see traces of strong energy – like fingerprints. And what he saw made his skin crawl.

Sever.

She had captured Logan… hopefully had not killed him. He prayed to every god he knew that his lover was safe.

Merde! How could he be so stupid, so careless to think that Sever wouldn't find him. How could he rely on some security system?

How stupid of him! He didn't notice his shaking hands when he entered the room in search of some clues. He really didn't know what he was looking for. When he saw little traces of blood, his heart sank.

Sever must have injured Logan. But how badly? Had the feral mutant healed?

Remy didn't know what to do? Should he go to the mansion and ask for help? He knew that if it concerned only him they could refuse, but Logan? Surely they would help… but not before he gave them some answers. No doubt they will blame him for the events. It was he who brought the threat to them.

He squeezed his eyes tightly shut and tried to clear his mind. It was no time to be panicking. He needed to find and help Logan, his secrets didn't mater here. Even if he had to leave the Mansion afterwards, he COULDN'T let Logan get hurt.

Despite his best attempts, his hands were shaking so badly he had problems with keeping something in them. Deep inside his chest, fear was suffocating him. Fear and anger. Why, he asked himself. Why did this happen? Did he really deserve so much suffering? When finally he found his chance on happiness, everything went wrong.

Now, he also wished that he told Logan that he loved him, yesterday. Because it was the truth. Now, watching the trashed room and thinking about the feral mutant dead, he realized the depth of his feeling. And it was too late. Logan was either kidnapped or killed by Sever and he never knew that Remy DID love him.

When he made up his mind and turned to leave the bedroom something caused the hair on his neck to stand up. Slowly, very carefully he turned around to check the room once more.

No further than a foot from him hovered a small ball of energy. It was no bigger than his nail and was glowing softly with white, warm light. It didn't seem threatening, but Remy knew better than that.

The energy felt like Sever herself.

He watched the sphere warily when it moved. Slowly, it floated past him and into the corridor. It didn't take a genius to understand that it was leading him somewhere. Probably into a trap, but what did he have to loose?

He followed the ball outside the Boathouse and cast a glance at the Mansion. If he could only let somebody know. Storm maybe. She was Logan's friend and would help… but he had no time. The ball was already disappearing into the line of trees and if he spent one more second pondering his actions he would never be able to find it again.

He couldn't afford to lose Logan.

* * *

Logan closed his eyes trying hard NOT to notice the constantly floating, circling balls of energy. His head was spinning and he was getting more and more angry by the minute. He tried to force his feral side inside. It wouldn't do him any good right now. He had no chance with that damned energy. It was time to think, not use his muscles.

He only wished Remy wouldn't come here. Because he knew Sever must have done something to leave him a clue. She was obviously waiting for something.

Her heartbeat was very slow and regular as if she was asleep, but it was the same when they fought in the Boathouse.

Her lack of reaction was unnerving, but Logan decided to outwait her. He was a hunter and sitting in the woods for hours waiting for his prey wasn't anything new to him. Eventually, he would have his chance.

First he heard her heart go faster, beat harder. The sudden reaction was followed by the opening of her strange golden eyes with vertical pupils, now dilating slightly.

Then he smelled him.

His heart sank when the smell of his worried lover reached him. Then he heard soft footsteps outside the cave.

Well that answered one of his questions. Sever had senses even better than his.

Soon, through the entrance to the cave floated one, tiny ball of energy and hovered in front of Sever. The young, white haired woman stood up and reached out a hand. She was still surrounded by a nimbus of white energy and she seemed to absorb the ball back inside her.

Now he knew how she managed to lead Remy here.

Sever backed off to the nearest wall. It took Logan a moment to understand her plans. In such situation the first thing Remy would see entering the cave will be Logan. And he wasn't looking good. Although his wounds had healed, the dried blood on his naked chest looked awful.

* * *

Remy sensed Logan – his concern, anger and impatience. He also sensed something very strange, unnatural even. He knew it was Sever, although she felt little different then the last time he "read" her.

The first thing he saw was Logan.

Sitting in the corner of the cave, surrounded by little balls of energy floating around him, he looked terrible.

Half naked, clad only in his jeans he hadn't had even his shoes on. But the worst part was his chest. All covered in dried blood. With terror, Remy watched the brown-red paths that indicated where the blood came from – the middle of his chest - down through his stomach matting the hair together and under the belt of his jeans.

"Logan!" He shouted when he saw him and dashed in his direction.

"Don't touch the balls!" Shouted Logan in his most demanding voice, causing Remy to stop abruptly.

Logan could smell the fear and worry on the younger man and tried to sooth him. His voice became low and gentle.

"Easy kid. I'm fine. It just looks bad but I'm OK. Healing factor, remember?"

Remy calmed a little and made few steps in his direction. His red on black eyes blazing in anger and throwing a strange, red shadow on his razor sharp cheekbones. He looked like an angel of revenge.

"What have you done to him?!" He whirled around, a pair of cards appearing in his hands seemingly from nowhere. He looked Sever straight in the eye and refused to feel any fear. He was so angry, that he couldn't think about anything but Logan's wounds.

Sever, as usual, didn't react to his angry words or aggressive stance. He couldn't harm her.

"I have waited for you." She said in a, strange for her, soft voice.

Remy realized that she was… different from the last time he saw her.

He charged his cards instinctively when she started approaching him.

"Fighting me has no sense. You know you can not win. Besides…" She trailed of and moved her eyes to Logan.

One of the balls stopped and hovered in front of Logan. "Not again!" He thought, angered and growled both at the ball and the woman. There was more anger than fear in him. The physical pain wasn't something that could stop him. He was more afraid of the effect it might have on the rather unstable Cajun.

Remy also understood what it meant and slowly drew the charge back.

"What do you want?" Asked a deceptively calm Remy.

Logan snarled at the fruitless attempt. He had asked the same question many times before and the girl didn't answer.

"I want you to spend eight hours here. I mean you no harm. However, if you will not agree to my suggestion, your friend will pay for it."

The ball hovered an inch closer to Logan's heaving chest and his curly hair disappeared at the contact. Logan snarled loudly to make sure everyone knew how unhappy he was.

Remy once again shut down his emotions, his face an expressionless mask.

"Gambit understands." He said putting the cards away. "Let him go, and Gambit will do anything y' want."

"I ain't leavin ya here kid. So stop this bullshit!" Logan cut in harshly.

Sever watched them with interest. A few hours ago she couldn't understand the true meaning of what she was seeing but now… now things were different. And even the knowledge that she will forget almost everything until the end of the day, didn't change her opinion. She was… happy. Glad to be able to complete her mission.

"There is no need to argue. I will not let either of you go." Said Sever calmly.

"Why?" Remy couldn't understand.

"It would be strategically illogical. It would cause only troubles. I need you here for 8 hours, then you will be free and never hear from me again."

"But why?"

She didn't answer, just kept staring at Remy's face. It was so strange to see him young and healthy. The face she remembered was covered in scars with one red eye surgically removed…

A sudden flash of memory caught her completely off guard.


Flashback

"`M hungry papa…" She was so young. Maybe seven years old, maybe less but she knew hunger and fear like no other. In the dark, terrifying world she had to live, she had only one good thing.

Caring, big, gentle hands coming on her red hair and stroking her head gently.

"Shush petite… we `ave to wait." Said a deep, beautiful voice that filled her heart with hope and love. She turned around in strong arms holding her and reached her small, dirty hand to the face she knew was there. In the dark she could only see one glowing, red spot.

Suddenly a broken street lamp flickered, revealing face she knew and loved so much. Completely grey hair gathered into a short ponytail, one red on black eye looking at her with such love and care and sorrow. She reached her hand to touch his cheek. Sharp cheekbones now sharper than ever from pain, lack of sleep and constant hunger.

The strange, alien texture of scars on his skin. Scars so deep and so many that he hardly had any feeling left in it. The other eye – or what used to be it –was covered with piece of black cloth.

He closed his healthy eye and leaned into the touch. He so desperately wished to be able to gather enough food to feed his daughter. But it was nearly impossible to only stay alive.

He had only 38 years and looked like 50. Many wounds that were never healed caused him pain, and he would have probably ended that pitiful excuse for life if it wasn't for that little angel in his arms.

Hiding his feelings from her was useless. She was an empath and strongest energy converter that this world had ever seen. She was seven years old and was dying.

"Je t'aime mon couer."

"Je aussi." She whispered back.

The sound of gunshots tore through the night like thunder. They both knew that the military patrol had found and killed another mutant. He looked into the golden on black eyes and wished he could change the past. Wished that little angel in his arms was never born to witness such cruelty and pain.

Flashback


Now Sever stared at the unharmed flesh of Remy's face and couldn't shake off the memories.

Not thinking about her actions she moved closer to the young man and reached out a hand.

She didn't hear the shout that Logan gave out. Nor did Remy whose empathy suddenly picked up a rush of emotions emanating from Sever. He never felt ANYTHING from her and what shocked him even more was that the emotions were strongly tied to him!

In complete terror, Logan watched the softly glowing hand approach his lover's face. He knew how much pain that light could cause and howled in frustration, because he couldn't do anything.

To his utter surprise nothing happened. She just touched him and the nimbus of energy seemed to be nothing more than a simple light.

The feel of soft, warm skin under her fingertip was so strange… the meaning of it caused her eyes to sting. She never noticed the single tear flowing down her cheek when she traced the lines of non-existent scars.

Logan smelled the salt and watched in bewilderment the scene in front of him.

Remy felt the pain and happiness in her. Strangely his shields didn't seem to be able to block out her feelings. He felt them so deep and so achingly strong. Not thinking he grabbed her hand and squeezed it. His natural reaction was to lessen the pain, to take the suffering away.

"So much pain…" He whispered and reached out with his empathy. He never was able to stand and watch as somebody was hurting. And in her case… it was something inside him that screamed for action.

And then suddenly he FELT her mind. So confused, filled in pain, hope and… calm desperation. In that moment he knew, that whatever was her target, she would do absolutely ANYTHING to achieve it.

He felt her emotions, fear and… personality. Her mind was still strange but nowhere near the black hole that she was when he tried to read her the last time.

"Who are you? You are not Sever… What do you want from me?" He asked softly.

Sever felt his empathy, her memories allowing her to recognize the feeling of smoothness and calm. HE used to cheer her up that way, made that to lessen her pain.

"I am here to save you… Remy." She said softly, backing off a little and trying to recompose herself. Remembering her past caused her to experience emotions with all the inner turmoil it caused.

At her one thought the little "guardian" balls left Logan and directed to the entrance of the cave.

Logan in an instant was on his lover side checking him for injuries. He could SMELL tears and pain coming off of BOTH of Remy and Sever and couldn't understand what the hell was happening.

He tried to dry off the wet cheeks of his lover and held him close while his body shook with pain he absorbed.

"What have you done to him?" He shouted feeling completely helpless to stop it! " He is hurting!"

" `s OK, Cher." Whispered Remy squeezing his arm lightly. "Not her fault. It is she who hurts… Remy just FEELS her pain. And…"

He pushed past Logan's protective embrace and stared at the young woman in front of him. Her vertical pupils so dilated that there was almost no gold around it.

"And what?" Asked Logan.

"Love?" Whispered Remy. Now he was sure. Under the pain was deep, sweet love. The kind that lasted through everything. But the shade of the feeling took him aback. It wasn't passionate or friendly. It was so utter and… pure… that he just couldn't place it.

"LOVE?!" Shouted Logan. "What the hell is going on here?!"

Sever gave them a weak smile. The feelings were overwhelming and she had little time.

"I will tell you everything, but you MUST stay here." Sever said.

"Why?" Remy was more confused than angry.

"Because in the next eight hours Sinister will attack the Mansion. His only target will be… capturing you, Remy."

"What for?" That was unclear for Remy.

"Because he has another plan for creating the perfect, strongest mutant. First, he thought about Scott and Jean's offspring but when they became too difficult he found another solution. You are an energy converter. He wants to clone you."

"But de man can't. He tried already." Remy dissagreed.

Sever moved a few feet away and then started talking in voice that forced Logan and Remy to stand still and listen.

"He will kill Wolverine, badly injure Iceman and kidnap you."

"Wha…?"

"He will take you to his most secret base and there he will proceed with experiments and research to understand the nature of your mutation. In the first year of your captivity he will remove surgically your left eye to have it as a gene bank."

"You are bullshitting! The X-Men would search for him, supposing what you said is true." Logan snapped at Sever sharply.

She looked at them sadly.

"It is the truth. It is your future Remy. You ask who I am. Right now I am a person that came from the future. I live in Sever's body and mind but only for today. When the day ends, I will forget my past and become Sever again. I tell you the truth. The X-Men won't look for you because they will be all dead three months from now . They and other X-Teams. No one will survive. The first to die will be Professor Xavier, then Scott and Jean, Iceman, Beast… They will all die."

"But… but…" Stumbled Remy. "How?"

"Sever. When Sinister comes back with you to the lab he will wake Sever and order her to kill the X-Men. And she will do it without any problems. The government will see her power and soon declare all mutants a danger to the country. They will be hunted and exterminated. You will spend seven years in the laboratory. Your face and large parts of body will be covered in scars and injuries that never quite heal. Part of them will be a result from constant experiments, part because Victor Creed will be your main guardian during that time. Sinister would be concerned only about your genes, nothing more. After seven years, he finally will develop a way to clone you and you will be useless for him."

"How will he do dat?" There was a curiousity in Gambit's voice.

"You see, Sever, me… she is an energy converter like you. With the difference that you use the energy from within yourself and I from the outside world, draining it from my surroundings. He will use genes from both bodies to create an embryo."

"A chile…" said the Cajun.

"Yes. A child. Sever is only a machine, she never refuses an order but this was one of the two times she did. She broke the tank where the embryo was growing, knowing somehow that it would survive and handed it to you helping you escape. You managed to keep the child safe for seven years. The child got sick. It occurred to you that Sinister had built in a kind of self destruction program. If he wasn't able to constantly check on his experiments, the genes started to fall apart. The child was dying slow and painful death. There was no chance of salvation."

"What happened next?" the thief asked.

"Sever, after discovering it, fought the program and killed Sinister."

"Good." Growled Logan.

"Along with 80 million people and caused a major ecologic catastrophe."

"What?"

"She used her full power and turned herself into a kind of living black hole. She destroyed the half of the North America. The climate changed suddenly. All around the world mutants were cursed and beat to death by scared and angry people. The Earth was rapidly dying and there was no way of stopping the inevitable. Sever caused people to become… extinct."

"And the child? What happened with…" Remy trailed off, staring at the young woman in front of him.

"Yes." She said simply.

"Mon Dieu! It's you… but how…?"

"I was dying, Papa. I was a mutant designed in a laboratory and my powers manifested very early. I used both yours and my energy to relocate my mind in time. The easiest object to find was Sever. He body was fully functional and her mind didn't possess awareness, so I wasn't forced to fight with her. But changing her objectives was much harder than I imagined, and it took me ten years to finally wake up. If I stop Sinister from kidnapping you, I'll change the future."

Remy could only stand and stare at her. So much information… and the implications! If everything she said is true, that would mean she was his daughter. Was it the reason for his empathy to pick up her emotions with such strength?

"You said that Sinister will attack… Remy can't stand and jus' watch. De Iceman… he Remy's friend…" Whispered Remy as realization dawned on him. Just two days ago he gained new friend and now was he supposed to stand aside and watch? "You said dat Iceman… he will be hurt. Will
he survive?" Remy pleaded,

Sever opened her mouth but didn't say a word. The truth was, Bobby died because of major internal bleeding that Hank just wasn't able to stop.

"He died." Answered Logan.

* * *

Scott ran to the war room panting slightly. All the alarms in the mansion went off.

~ Jean! ~ He screamed inside his mind.

~ I hear you. ~ came the telepathic answer.

~ Call everyone to the war room. Sinister opened a tesseract in the middle of our grounds. He has his mercenaries with him. It would be a
tough fight.~

~ Beast is already in war room, Storm is on her way. Angel also. I am too.~

When Scott entered the room he met four pairs of eyes watching him expectantly.

"Wolverine? Gambit? Iceman? Where are they?"

Jean closed her eyes and opened them suddenly, worry on her face.

"Logan and Remy are on the grounds… I can feel them in the west woods but…"

"But what?"

"There is somebody with them. I don't know who but that person is obviously keeping them in place."

"Can you read them?"

"Gambit's shields are too strong, Logan… I pick up confusion, anger… and distress. I can't understand what may have caused it. But there
is no aggression in him. I think. He is so hard to read."

"And the intruder?"

Jean closed her eyes and licked her suddenly dry lips.

"I know it may sound strange… but it has no mind."

"And Bobby?"

She closed her eyes once more, concentrating on the young man's mind and cried out when she picked up his thoughts.

"He was in the woods when Sinister landed. He's fighting his
mercenaries all alone!"

"Stars and Garters!" Exclaimed Hank, he knew the boy had no chances only by himself. None of them had. – He would die!

"Storm, Jean, Angel you will fly. Hank and I are going to…"

* * *

Sever looked away.

"I am sorry Papa, but there is no way you could help him. Sinister will attack not only using his mercenaries but also personally. You never stood a chance against him."

"Remy is not so weak chere… he can fight jus' fine." said Remy sharply.

"I know about the mental shields. The plan of Sinister's attack will base on disarming you in the first place by crushing your shields."

Logan noticed how his lover paled suddenly and put a hand to the small of his back, massaging lightly to reassure him.

"In your future, Sever was on Sinister's side. Now you are on ours. You could help us fight." Said Logan. "With your power you could take
him out easily."

"Haven't you heard what I said? Sever… I… fought Sinister and it caused the reaction that led to death of billions of people. I can not risk that. It would destroy my plans. I want to save you, Remy not kill."

Remy, who was silent for the past few moments finally spoke.

"If your plan succeeds, you will never be born…, right?"

Sever once again remembered the love and sorrow her father used to feel looking at her and nodded.

"It will be better that way. This world… it is not ready for such a power. Sever was designed using alien technology. She is too strong for the balance to be maintained. Your powers, when they went haywire were also terrible. You are far beyond omega class. Now only the implant dampens your powers. Imagine how strong, how deadly I was? I had all your powers in their full strength AND Sever's. And had none of your weaknesses."

"What implant?" Logan interrupted.

Everyone went silent.

"Those three days… after the… lab, you took me away for three days. You implanted it."

"I am sorry but it was necessary. And I promised."

"Promised? Whom?" Asked Remy.

"You. You asked me to dampen your powers. In the future it caused you so much pain and suffering that you hated it with all your heart. You often lost control over it. When I was around I could just draw the charge inside myself, but different… people died and you hated yourself for it even more."

Remy shivered and leaned closer to Logan.

"Remy believe you…" Said Remy softly. "But I won't stay here and wait like a coward. I never was one and don't intend to became one now." He never noticed that his accent had vanished. It happened sometimes when he wanted to say something important.

"I am sorry. But I cannot let you go."

"You must." Stated Remy slowly.

"Why?" Surely none of them was able to FORCE her.

"Because I would never forgive myself. You said you wanted to save me from pain and hurt. This way you will just replace one kind of pain
with other."

* * *

"Eat this!" Shouted Bobby in his Ice form and shot a large bolt of ice right in the chest of mutant with long, stretching arms, approaching him.

He knew that this kind of fight would end badly. There was just too many of them!

~ Hold on! ~ Came telepathic call from Jean. ~ We are coming.~

The other mercenary, who was apparently able to control electricity, shot a bolt at him. Bobby managed to dodge it and slide away but he was quickly pushed to defense. He thought about the X-Men rule – don't kill- and decided it was time to break it. Fighting like this he was on the straightaway to hell.

Changing into his new Ice form, covered in the special Ice he has shown to Hank, he made twenty feet high columns of ice that shot him high into the air and turned around. With one thought the mutant able to control electricity was encased in the solid block of ice.

Suddenly the column broke and he started falling. The other attacker had shot a hole through the column, but Bobby managed to form another ice slide and avoided falling.

However, he wasn't fast enough. The sharp pain in his side caused him to slip and land on hard ground with a loud thud. His head was spinning and he changed into his human form again. He looked down at his side and saw a large, quickly growing, pool of blood.

"Oh fuck! Drake you are in trouble!"

"Yer can say that again, ice boy!" Came the gruff reply from behind him. Suddenly he felt hands gripping the back of his shirt and hauling him into the air. He was tossed at the nearest tree.

When he looked up he realized he was staring into black, maniacal eyes. Victor Creed.

* * *

Suddenly Sever sighed loudly and raised her hand to her nose. The moment she felt thick, hot blood on her fingers she knew.

"It has begun."

"How do you know?" Asked Logan.

"I am losing my memories."

"Please Sever…" Remy urged her, knowing that if they didn't convince her, there would be no way to leave the cave. "Please."

She looked at him pondering her options. The safest way was to keep Remy here but she KNEW him well enough to understand his need for action. He would NEVER forgive himself, even if it wasn't his fault.

The pain in her head was increasing. Soon, she would forget who she was. Sighing softly, she reached out a hand.

"Charge me." Sever asked

"What?!" cried out Remy.

"I need more energy to open the tesseract. If you want to help your friend, you have to deliver the energy. Charge me."

Remy didn't hesitate. Although he wasn't sure it was safe he thought he could always draw the charge back.

Logan growled when he neared the young woman, but otherwise didn't try to stop him. He was just making sure everyone knew how he felt about things.

Slowly, tentatively Remy touched her fingers. White skin was warm and very soft. Without any calluses, like a hand of a child. He felt something, his empathy picking up on her emotions, feelings towards him and his eyes started to water. He never felt such a pure love. She was sacrificing herself to save him.

Slowly he let just a bit of his charge leak out to make sure he would not hurt her. Nothing happened so he let the energy increase. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. He watched worriedly the blood that was slowly dripping from her nose to the white tee shirt.

Soon he was charging her with full his force. Short hair on Logan's back stood up as he could almost feel the energy in the air.

Suddenly, she broke the contact and looked into red on black eyes with something akin to a smile in her golden ones. Behind her with silent /whoosh/ she opened a tesseract.

The strange moment was broken and they stepped into the tesseract without further delay.

The first thing they noticed was Sabertooth attempting to slash Bobby's chest. In a matter of a heartbeat, cards were in Remy's hands and were flying towards Creed. The explosion didn't kill him, but was at least thrown away from the wounded Iceman.

"You think it is enough to stop me Cajun?" Shouted Creed mockingly, his wounds already healed.

"No, but let's try this!" Logan cut in and launched himself on Creed All the things Remy confessed about Creed hurting him, the scars and what Sever said about Creed torturing Remy further played in Logan's mind, clouding his brain with a red fog of hatred. He wanted to rip that stinking heart out and force it into his throat.

He moved so quickly, and used the element of surprise, that his claws were buried deep in the Sabertooth's chest, before the other had the time to think.

They both growled and snarled at each other when Logan, smiling ferally, jerked his arms outwards slashing Creeds chest apart. He felt the ribcage surrendering to his adamantium claws and bared his teeth. He wasn't sure if Creed would be able to heal from that but he wanted to make sure.

Right then he got distracted by a terrible wind and crashing of thunder. The rest of the X-Men were there. They started to fight the mercenaries. Now, no longer surprised, they were winning. But Sinister himself wasn't fighting.

Everything turned to hell when Sinister decided to take the mater into his own hands. He surrounded himself with powerful energy shield and started firing his blasts from a strange ruby stone on his forehead.

Jean tried to shield everyone but they were too scattered. Storm flew high into the air and Angel also sought cover. Jean shielded Scott who was nearest and Bobby, who finally regained consciousness to build a thick wall of ice in front of himself and Hank, who was desperately trying to stop the bleeding.

Frustrated and angry Sinister looked for more available targets. The first person he spotted was Logan so he hit him hard in the chest with his laser.

"Logan!" Shouted Remy and dashed to his wounded lover. The fear and shock made him forget about Logan's healing power.

Sever didn't notice any of it. She couldn't remember how she got there. What was she doing? Fighting? And why did her head hurt so much"

The blood started flowing faster from her nose and she dropped to her knees, clutching her head.

Remy started charging his cards and throwing them at Sinister in a flurry of explosions. However none of them hurt the damn scientist. Scott's blast also couldn't penetrate the shield. They were quickly being thrown to the defensive.

"LeBeau! You are going to pay for all the troubles you caused me!"

Remy looked around desperately, but he was on a clearing. He had no place to hide from the beam. He watched in terror as the red light neared him.

Sever heard Sinister and looked up. The pain was so great she couldn't possibly stand on her own, but she still heard him. There was something deep inside her, outside the program that forced her to pay attention. To DO something. Remy… LeBeau… - thinking was just so hard right now – objectives… protect…

She reached out her hand, having problems with controlling their power and sent one tiny ball of energy.

Everyone watched in silent awe as the tiny, little ball of energy crossed the path of the beam and forced the energy to flare around it. The laser turned, twisted and glowed until it was completely assimilated by the now big sphere of glowing, white energy.

Slowly, in complete silence the ball started divide itself. First in two, then in four and so forth. Soon there were few dozens of small, golf ball sized spheres. They started floating, moving slowly, and glowing with soft light. Their movement became faster as they started to make bigger circles. First it looked nice, small and glowing balls floating around, but when they started moving faster and farther they encountered obstacles and cut through them. Everyone watched in complete awe as the small things cut through trees, rocks, and earth.

When the first ball reached Sinister's shield, there was a loud /poof/ and it cut right through it. Then Sinister howled in pain as the same ball buried itself into his knee. The pain was unbearable.

Soon after, the other balls followed the first one. They watched in silence as the seemingly invulnerable mutant writhed in pain, his body shred into parts by small, innocent looking balls.

Remy looked at the young woman now lying on the ground with her eyes shut and face covered in blood. Her skin looked pale and tight. She was in obvious pain. He couldn't leave her like that.

He started approaching her still body.

"No Remy!" Shouted Logan trying to get up, his wound almost gone. "Don't touch her! You remember what she said? Once Sinister was defeated she will no longer be your daughter. She will become Sever again."

"Remy knows.. Cher… mais… Remy can't leave her like this. She… she saved us."

"I know Rems, I know…" whispered Logan softly, coming to Remy and, not bothering about others watching them, he grabbed the back of Remy's head and kissed him passionately.

"Remy want to take care of her." He was pleading Logan with his eyes to understand and to agree. Maybe she wasn't his daughter now but… she was before.

"WE will take care of her."

Remy smiled at the feral man, feeling his heart swell with pride and love.

"Je t'aime, Logan."

"I love ya too, Remy. With all my heart."

They both approached the still figure not even noticing the shocked expressions of their teammates.

"Wait." Said Logan when Remy leaned over the girl. " Let me try. Remember that nimbus of hers? I will heal, ya won't."

He tentatively reached out a hand and jerked away with a hiss, sucking on his partially non existent tip of his finger.

He growled matter- of- factly.

Remy nodded and knelt beside the young woman.

"Sever? Chere, you hear Remy?" He asked softly, allowing his empathy and his charm to work on her, sensing the pain she was in and trying to soothe it. It took him some time but eventually she opened her eyes and looked at him. Her golden eyes clouded with pain and confusion.

"Let Remy help y'." He slowly reached out and touched her.

Nothing happened so he moved closer so he could take her into his arms.

"Let Remy take y' somewhere safe, OK?"

"Remy…" She whispered weakly when he lifted her. "LeBeau…"

"Oui."

Remy stood up, careful of the surprisingly heavy girl in his arms and sighed feeling the warm, callused hand touching the small of his back.

"Let's go home kid. We got a lot to tell the others."

Remy nodded and started walking, his heart lighter than ever before when he watched the sun come down. He was going home. Finally



The end.


if you like it let me know, so I would post another story :)it's not like I am fishing for compliments here or sth....
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