Return To Innocence

by Morgana

Email: morganalebeau@yahoo.com

Fandom: XMen

Rating: NC-17

Pairings: Remy/Scott

Summary: Remy discovers that Scott's secret wish is having a real family, including kids. Frustrated that he can't fulfill Scott's wish because he's a man he seeks out Sinister's help, uncertain if the mad scientist will lure him into another trap. Accepting all risks that come with a male pregnancy, he hides his condition from Scott until destiny strikes

Many thanks to Mems for beta reading the parts

NOTE: These are four stories and should be read in the correct order, otherwise they won't make much sense. The Eyes Of A Child is the first story, followed by Shadows and Insanity. Return to Innocence is now finished. Please note that this story deals with rape and child abuse and is therefore rated NC-17.

Authors Warning! Please read this warning carefully and then decide whether or not to read "Eyes of a child".

In this story I describe Remy's childhood in an Alternate Universe. Remy escapes from the Antiquary, but ends up on the streets of New Orleans where he has to survive on his own. He doesn't have any real friends and is forced to sell his body to stay alive. Remy is a nine year hustler in this story and the sexual acts are described in a graphic manner. There is even one scene in which Remy faces rape. If you don't like to read these kind of stories go back and chose another story or go to another site. Please do not write me, telling me I've got a sick mind. This is fanfiction and like all my other stories this one will have a happy end.

Author's note - I stole Jean-Luc's speech from http://library.magellanspecialty.com/healthmessages/Sexuality.htm as I don't know too much about the subject myself. No copyright infringement is intended.

Remy opened his eyes, feeling incredibly sleepy and satiated at the same time. His body buzzed with life after making love with Scott. The final act had been sweet and loving, just as he had hoped it would be. And Scott had even worn a modified collar so his eyes were visible. Has to be true l'amour!

But why was he alone in bed? He distinctly remembered falling asleep in Scott's arms. Alarmed, he sat upright in bed. Shivering from the cold, he wrapped the sheet around his body and left the warm bed. Instinctively, he walked over to the window and felt humbled at the sight of the magnificent sunset. In the distance, sitting with his back against a tree, was Scott. His empathy was strong enough to receive Scott's melancholy and worried, he grabbed a shirt and jeans, quickly slipping into them.

Why was Scott feeling down? Was it something he had done? No, he refused to believe that Scott had second thoughts about making love to him. Scott had been ecstatic and it had been Scott's idea to take the final step.

Apprehensively, he started for Scott, hoping the other man would accept his company. No matter how strong Scott's love for him was he still feared rejection. It was impossible to shake lifelong insecurities within a few weeks.

"Scott? Cher?" He remained a few feet away, unwilling to infringe on Scott's privacy.

Scott stared at the red, burning sky and finally acknowledged his lover by nodding his head.

Shyly, Remy sat down beside Scott, not touching yet, still maintaining some distance. "Want me to stay or to leave? I'll understand if you don' wanna talk." He did his best to hide his fear of rejection, but realized that some of it had seeped through the link and into Scott's mind. During these last few intimate hours, their bond had deepened.

"Empaths..." Scott mumbled, resting a hand on Remy's arm, gently stroking his lover's skin.

Remy grew more confident, encouraged by Scott's touch. "Somethin' wrong, cher?"

"Not wrong... not exactly... wrong is the wrong word," Scott mused, dryly. Smiling, he cocked his head and looked at his lover. "Nothing can be wrong after making love to you. Everything's right."

Remy blushed and averted his eyes. He had seldom felt this shy. His empathy told him that Scott was telling him the truth. "Mais you feel sad for some reason, cher."

Scott nodded his head. Lying to a telepath never worked. "I'm thinking, Remy... remembering."

"Rememberin' what?" Why did he fear the answer?

Scott took hold of Remy's icy cold hands and warmed them in his. He read the insecurity in his lover's eyes and mind, and the last thing he wanted was to upset Remy, but he had to be honest with his lover. "I was thinking about Jean." The sudden guilty expression in Remy's eyes made him cringe. "Remy, Jean wants us to be happy, always remember that. But you also have to understand that Jean was such a big part of my life that I can't simply forget about her." He silenced the Cajun with a gentle kiss. "I know you don't want me to forget her, I really do, but at the same time you feel...?"

Realizing Scott wanted him to finish the sentence for him, he cleared his throat and gathered his courage. Speaking about Jean was always hard on him for some elusive reason. "I feel like I stole you from her... If she were still 'live you'd be wit' her, not me... Jean and you belon' toget'er and..."

"Once we get back to the mansion I want you to watch the messages Jean left behind." He gently squeezed Remy's hand. "She knew you loved me and no, you're not second best. I choose to be with you. I want to be with you. We're going to be all right, Remy."

Remy licked his lips. "Cher, why feel sad?" He felt like he still hadn't reached the heart of the matter. Jean was part of it, but...

Now Scott felt uncomfortable. He had hoped that Remy wouldn't pressure him into talking, but at the same time he realized that he didn't want to have secrets from Remy. Folding an arm around his lover, he pulled Remy close and encouraged the younger man to rest his head against his shoulder. Remy accepted.

"Dat bad?" Remy swallowed, nervously.

"No, it's just... Jean and I hoped to have kids some day... A boy and a girl, who we could raise and watch become adults." Scott smiled, saddened.

You never bonded wit' Rachel... alas, mais... "What 'bout Madeline? What about your fils...?" Remy wasn't sure he should address this, but Scott seemed willing to talk about it, to unburden his soul.

"I was a real mess back then. Jean had died and Maddie... I don't think I ever really loved her and Nate... I didn't spend a whole lot of time with him and later Rachel had to take him with her into the future." Scott shook his head. "Why can't I have a break in life? Why can't I sit back and enjoy watching them grow up? I want to be a real father... someone who's always there for them..."

Remy cringed. What Scott wants is de one t'ing I can't give him...

"Hey!" Alarmed, Scott hugged his lover close. "You make me happy, Remy. Don't make a big fuss over this. We get new kids at the Academy each year and some of them will need a father figure. We can 'adopt' them, plus it will be fun to have all this time to ourselves."

"Mais it ain' de same..." I wish I could give you what you want...

Scott regretted ever mentioning it to Remy. In an effort to distract Remy, he leaned in closer and claimed his lover's lips. I love you, Remy, he told his lover telepathically. Remy's eyes began to burn.

"There's no 'mais', Remy." He rubbed Remy's back with long, soothing strokes. Using a minimum of strength, he laid Remy down on the grass and continued to kiss his lover breathlessly. Remy's body heat warmed him and his groin stirred. Growing hard, he moaned his desire.

Oh, cher, je t'aime... Remy cupped the back of Scott's head in his hand and enjoyed his lover's closeness. Spreading his legs, he invited Scott to settle between them; an invitation, which Scott eagerly accepted. Within seconds, Remy was hard and craving release. Trusting himself to Scott, he sighed as his lover unbuttoned his jeans, allowing his throbbing cock to bounce free. Was Scott going to take him again? If he was honest with himself, he had to admit to feeling sore...

Scott read that particular worry in Remy's mind and deepened the kiss. Although making love to Remy had been sweet last night, he didn't plan on taking his lover again this soon, not as long as Remy was suffering from any discomfort. There were other ways to express their love.

Agile thief's hands unzipped him and pulled down his jeans and boxers. Aligning their cocks, Scott started a slow rhythm, reaffirming their love. "I love you..." Remy's empathy flared, setting his mind on fire and united them in a passionate climax.

Coming hard, they clung to each other. "You're amazing, Remy."

Satiated, Remy smiled. He vividly recalled the rapture he had seen in Scott's eyes when his lover had come last night.

"We should head back, take a shower and start dinner... darling..." Scott added the endearment hesitantly, uncertain how Remy would react.

"Darlin'?" Remy smiled lazily, stretching his body like a cat. No lover had ever bothered with an endearment before. "I like it."

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After dinner, they settled down on the couch. Remy was reading a book, snuggled up to Scott's side. His lover was flipping channels until he found a news broadcast.

"Hey, come here..." Scott firmly pulled his lover down until his knees served as a pillow, supporting Remy's head. "What are you reading?"

It had been months since he'd had the energy and desire to read a good book and he had found this one at the cabin. "Didn' have much choice, cher..." Closing the book, he presented it to Scott.

Curiously, Scott read the title on the cover. "The Vampire Armand?" He chuckled softly. "Remy?"

"Hey, don' look at me like dat! It's a good book!" Muttering softly, he flipped back to the right page and continued reading. "Bah, it's a good book... you should read it... very sensual..."

"Sensual?" Scott provocatively licked his lips.

"Oh, cher... stop distractin' me!" Remy squirmed, pretending annoyance. He lifted his right hand and caressed his lover's face. Suddenly the laughter and the teasing died. "I'm really sorry, cher..."

Scott frowned. "Sorry for what?"

"Dat Jean and you never got to enjoy de chil'ren. You're bon parents... I can tell."

"You can?" The frown on Scott's brown deepened. Ever since he had admitted to Remy that he would have liked to have children, his lover been depressed, like it was his fault that they couldn't have any children. "Remy?"

"Jean-Luc adopted me... you know dat... he's de only real poppa I've ever had... Sinister only wanted me for his experiments and even Jean-Luc... He stole me from de hospital when I was li'l. Every chile wants someone who loves dem unconditionally. Jean-Luc only tried so hard 'cause he made a mistake..."

"Did you ever talk to Jean-Luc about this? Does he know that... that you know what happened after you were born? He called you a few days ago, didn't he?"

Remy shivered. "Oui, dat was when I found out Sinister was playin' me..."

"Playing you... he did help you, didn't he?" Scott didn't want to play devil's advocate, but had no choice. Sinister's behavior still had him puzzled. "It almost looked like Sinister really cared about what happened to you."

"Cher, he uses my DNA to conduct his experiments wit'... dat wasn' 'bout me..."

Scott couldn't bear seeing the sad expression in Remy's eyes. "Are you sure? I mean, you're the empath... didn't you feel anything else?"

"He has tight shields, cher. I only felt what he wanted me to feel."

"Are you going to talk to them? Both of them? You lost your trust in Jean-Luc when you found out that he stole you from the hospital. Do you want to continue to feel like you can't trust him?"

Remy closed his eyes. "I don' wanna t'ink 'bout dat."

"You have to... and then there's Sinister..." Scott took a deep breath and fingered a silken lock of his lover's hair. "You weren't conscious at the time, Remy, but I don't think he faked his concern. He sat at your bedside the entire time, trying to connect with you. There were real emotions in his eyes, in his face. His body was tense... you can't fake things like that."

"You mean dat?" Remy licked his lips and tried to reconcile the image Scott painted with that of the mad scientist that had sent him into the Morlock tunnels... he failed. "You must be wrong, cher. He acted his part... he don' care."

"I'm not so sure..." But Scott decided not to push Remy and changed their subject instead. "Are you moving into my rooms or am I moving into yours?" They hadn't discussed living arrangements yet.

"I don' know," Remy whispered, cautiously. "What do you want?" He would rather not live in the same quarters where Jean and Scott had lived as a married couple, but he forced himself to let Scott decide.

Scott nodded his head, reading part of Remy's thoughts and wondered if his lover was aware that his mind was wide open. "Your room? That's if you don't mind me moving in with you?" Now that he was thinking it over, he had to agree with Remy. It was best to make a fresh start. Living in his rooms would constantly remind him of Jean and if he wanted this relationship to work, he had to put Remy first.

Remy nodded eagerly. "Would love to have you, cher..."

"Okay, we'll move my stuff to your room." Scott tried to pay more attention to the news broadcast, but Remy's closeness kept distracting him. "I'm really glad things are working out between us."

"Me too," Remy admitted, smiled and picked up reading where he had left off.

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Remy tossed and turned, unable to sleep. He was holding Scott close, lying spooned behind his lover, but tonight Scott's presence didn't soothe him. He felt restless and... inadequate, even guilty. He loved Scott and wished he could give his lover what he really wanted; a child of their own, but it would never happen. Maybe they could adopt one?

That idea had him wondering about his own abilities to be a good parent. His youth had shaped him into the person he was today and he doubted he would make a good parent. Yes, Jean-Luc was a good role model, but raising a kid himself was a different matter. He would probably do everything wrong.

Unable to sleep, he untangled himself from Scott and left the bed. He slipped into the bathrobe and descended the stairs. Maybe watching some TV or reading his book would make him fall asleep.

But sixty minutes later he was still awake. His telepathy told him that Scott was still asleep and he switched off the TV. Maybe he needed some fresh air. How cold would it be outside? He detoured to the bathroom, searched the laundry basket and dressed in some sweats. After stepping into his shoes and draping his coat over his shoulders, he finally stepped outside.

Il fait très froid. Hugging the coat closer to his frame, he headed for the spot where he had found Scott earlier that evening. He sat down on the cold grass and shivered. I'm probably gonna catch a cold... dis is madness. What de hell am I doin' out here at dis hour? I should be in bed... wit' Scott. Suddenly, the hair at the back of his neck grew rigid and goose flesh appeared all over his body. He was no longer alone and it wasn't Scott who had joined him. "Why are you here?" He didn't want to turn around, look his demon in the eyes.

"You're troubled."

Remy shivered violently, realizing that postponing the confrontation wouldn't work. He slowly turned around and flinched, looking into Jean-Luc's eyes. But this wasn't his father; he had learned to see through the disguise. "What do you want, Sinister?" He couldn't help remember being slashed open by Creed in the tunnels. Sinister had lied to him, had manipulated him and the Morlocks had died because he had been stupid enough to work for Sinister. If only his powers hadn't gone berserk! Why had he made so many mistakes in the past?

"You do know that your mind is wide open?" Sinister, who had once more taken Jean-Luc's guise, studied his son. Remy seemed worried, melancholy, even depressed.

"Merde!" No, he didn't know that he had been broadcasting. Gathering his courage, he finally looked Sinister in the eyes and repeated his earlier question. "What do you want from me, Sinister? Why can' you leave me 'lone or do you need my DNA 'gain, is dat it?" His tone was bitter, flavored with a hint of fear. Sinister was stronger than he was and could easily overpower him. Should he try to wake Scott? Would Scott hear his telepathic call?

"What I want?" Sinister observed him, thoughtfully. "The question is what you want."

Remy flinched, staring into Jean-Luc's eyes again. "Stop it! You ain' Jean-Luc! I know betta now." But he didn't want Sinister to morph back to his normal shape either. Confused, he averted his eyes, backing away from Sinister.

Sinister considered his son's words and used his morphing powers to change the color of his eyes.

Shivers ran down Remy's spin, as Jean-Luc's eyes turned red. A red diamond also appeared on the other man's brow, finally revealing his identity. It constantly reminded him of the fact that he was talking to Sinister. "Go 'way..."

"I can't do that... yet." Sinister cocked his head, frustrated because Remy had re-erected his shields. Now his son's thoughts were hidden from him. "Why are you this troubled?"

"Why do you wanna know? So you can use me 'gain? I won' fall for your lies ever 'gain!" Remy was tempted to walk away, but wasn't sure Sinister would let him so he simply stared at the grass. "Didn' you do 'nough damage yet?"

Sinister actually sighed. "Remy..."

Remy's thoughts invaded his mind and he heard the pain and anger in the words. "Remy..."

"Don'! Don' say my name! Jus' go 'way!" This man had never wanted to be his father, had used his DNA for his research. "You ruined my life once, I ain' gonna let you do dat 'gain!"

But Sinister wasn't prepared to back down this easily. "I was worried when you were possessed by Creed. I sat with you and I helped Xavier reverse the process." Why was it suddenly so important to him that Remy believed him? He had never really cared about his son, but lately, things had changed. He couldn't even blame the empathy anymore, knowing his paternal instincts were a separate matter. Remy's empathy wasn't affecting him right now and he still felt worried for his son. What had the empathy set in motion? "I didn't want you to find out the truth. I disguised myself as Jean-Luc because I know you trust him unconditionally and that was what we needed to reverse the process, your trust."

Remy remained silent, listening. Sinister's shields were too tight to probe and he felt blind. He only had Sinister's words to base his decisions on.

Sinister's red eyes burned as he addressed his son. "It's true that I only saw you as a source for DNA material for some time... but then things changed."

"When?" Remy looked Sinister in the eyes, trying to make sense of what was going on. Sinister could have hurt him, abducted him, killed him, but instead of doing that, Sinister was talking to him. How bizarre could things get?

"It started in Antarctica... I began to feel protective of you. Do you remember that Creed assaulted you?"

"And you defended me... told him off." Yeah, he clearly remembered that incident.

"That was when it started." Sinister carefully considered his next words, wondering why he was making himself this vulnerable. This wasn't like him! It's tied in with Remy. Something has set this off and I can't help wanting to protect him. "Then you got into trouble again when you absorbed Scott's depression. Xavier contacted me and..."

"What? De professor did what?" Startled, Remy took another step away from Sinister.

"Xavier figured that our bond would allow me to connect with you. You shut out the others and... something compelled me to try."

Remy shook his head. "You're playin' games... you always played games, figurin' out ways to hurt me... Why do you hate me dis much? What did I ever do to you? I was only a baby when..." Why was I born? Nobody wanted me... you even killed my mother.

Sinister received the accusation and couldn't deny it. "I killed her... yes."

But the past was the past and he couldn't change it. It was better to focus on the present. "What do you want from me now? Why are you here?"

Remy failed to shield his fear and Sinister realized that Remy expected to be hurt again, in whatever way. "Why don't you tell me what happened after I left?"

Remy shook his head. "You didn' expect Jean-Luc to call, did you? Why? Why pretend bein' Jean-Luc? Why pretend you wanna help me? What's de price? Rien comes for free in life. I learned dat lesson well!" His tone had turned self-accusatory and bitter. "Learned it de hard way!"

Sinister moved fast and covered the distance between them in mere seconds. Without giving Remy the time or the chance to retreat, he took hold of his son's right arm and held him in place. "You're going to listen to me!"

"Or what? You're gonna call Creed to slash me open 'gain? Or do it yourself dis time?" Remy felt emotionally exhausted and didn't know how to deal with the situation. "I feel like dere's no one I can trust... expect Scott, and you... you... look like poppa and..."

"Remy, I'm new at this as well. I don't know how to be a father!" Well, actually I do, but... my firstborn died and it's been so long since I felt this way!

"You never were my fat'er and you'll never be! You're... you're everythin' I hate!" Remy tried to free himself of Sinister's hold, but failed. He even considered charging something to break loose, but couldn't reach anything.

"Yes, I guess it's too late for me to be a father now, but... what are you doing out here in the dead of night? Why are you broadcasting like this?" He doubted another telepath could receive Remy's thoughts, but he could, thanks to the connection between them. Even when Remy wasn't close he always felt his son's presence at the edges of his mind.

Remy finally caved in. He still didn't believe Sinister cared, but fleeing wasn't an option either. Sinister would never let him go. "Feelin' guilty..."

"What for?" Sinister sensed the surrender, but didn't let go and tightly held on to Remy's arm. He still had a hard time dealing with his newly found protective feelings where Remy was concerned, but something urged him to do his best and to make Remy understand that he was serious.

"Scott wants chil'ren."

Puzzled, Sinister arched an eyebrow. That wasn't what he had been expecting.

"And I... I can'... bein' an homme. Mebbe I should end our relationship... den he can meet a nice femme and have chil'ren wit' her." Remy couldn't believe he was confiding in his arch enemy, but it had something to do with the trust and true concern Sinister radiated; It's probably fake... he don' care... I 'ways wanted to find my real parents, and den I find out that my fat'er killed my mot'er and is de scientist from hell!

What child didn't want to be loved by his parents? Jean-Luc and Mattie had filled that void in his life, but only because the Patriarch had felt guilty for stealing him in the first place.

Sinister still had a tight hold on his son's arm and tried to catch Remy's elusive gaze. "Remy, I'm a scientist... a male pregnancy isn't impossible. Of course there are risks involved, but I could help you... if you really want to do this."

"Oh non!" Remy finally managed to shake off Sinister's hold and immediately backed away from the other man. "I ain' makin' a pact wit' you! I did dat once 'fore 'cause my powers were out of control and it got de Morlocks killed!" His heart had throbbed loudly when Sinister had assured him that a male pregnancy was possible, but Sinister was only playing him. He couldn't take the bait!

Feeling the distrust, hate and hope in Remy's mind, Sinister backed off. "Why don't you think it over? You can discuss it with Scott if that makes you more comfortable."

"Forget 'bout it! Forget I ever mentioned it. If I had dat baby, you'd want it for your experiments and no one should have to suffer t'rough dat! You 'ways wanted Scott's DNA, Jean's and mine and you ain' gettin' more of it! If I had a chil' wit' Scott you would take it 'way from us and don' you dare deny it!" Remy had grown deadly pale and wondered if he would make it back to the cabin alive.

That didn't even cross my mind! Sinister shook his head, sending his thoughts into his son's mind. Yes, I understand that you think like that and if we'd had this conversation years ago, it might have been the truth. But things have changed. You're my son. I feel like I have a second chance in life. My firstborn never reached your age, Remy, and God damned me for trying to revive them... It was one of the things that made me turn to Apocalypse for support. He gave me my armor, my powers and supplied me with the alien knowledge I needed for my research. I didn't care about losing my feelings back then and I never realized what I had given up until I started to feel again, thanks to you.

Remy was startled, receiving Sinister's thoughts. He had never expected the other man to open up to him and he still wasn't sure why Sinister was trying to convince him. Sinister always had a hidden agenda. He just had to find out what the scientist was after this time. Unwilling to answer telepathically, he spoke aloud. "I don' believe you. I'm goin' back to de cabin now and you'd betta leave me 'lone in de future." Sinister would now show his true colors by stopping him from returning to Scott. He turned his back to Sinister and began walking away from the other man, staring at the cabin. Would he reach it? Would he ever see Scott again? Or would he find himself in Sinister's lab when he regained consciousness?

Sinister felt a stabbing sensation where his heart used to be. He had never thought Remy's rejection would hurt so much, but he couldn't really blame his son. In the past, he had manipulated and hurt Remy; it was only normal for the Cajun to react this way. His only chance was to persevere and to show Remy that he was serious. It might take him a lifetime.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why can' we stay at de boathouse?" Remy didn't want to stay at the mansion and convincing Scott that they should stay at the boathouse hadn't worked. Following Scott inside, he felt Rogue's presence. She quickly dashed into the living room, avoiding him.

Scott had noticed her actions as well and placed his hand at the small of Remy's back, trying to reassure his lover. "I'm team leader, Remy. I have to be here in case of an emergency." Giving up leadership had never been this tempting before and he would probably hand over command if Remy asked him to, but the Cajun would never pressure him into doing that.

"She doesn' want me here," Remy whispered, miserably. He wasn't only receiving Rogue's thoughts, Storm's were invading his mind as well. She walked down the corridor, nodded her head in passing and then left again. "Dey don' want me here."

Scott sighed and led Remy to his room. They would pack his stuff and settle down in Remy's room.

"Hey, you're back!" Bobby smiled, and walked over to them. "Need any help?" Scott was packing and it didn't take him long to figure out that his friend was moving his stuff to Remy's room. He was happy that things were working out for them. "It's been boring without you guys around!"

Remy arched an eyebrow, finding that Scott was also packing a framed picture of Jean, Nate and Rachel. It was the only picture around that featured them as a family. Saddened, he realized that it was a manipulated picture. Scott had never had his family close and complete. Wish I could give you dat, a family, mais... Sinister had offered to help him, but he didn't trust the scientist. Sinister would keep their baby for his experiments. One way or the other, they had to find a way to live with that void in their lives.

"Let's do this." Scott picked up two piles of clothes and deposited them in Remy's arms. "Do you have enough space in your closet?"

"Sure, cher. I'll make space." Remy smiled, momentarily pushing his worried thoughts in to the back of his mind.

"Bobby, you can carry these..." Scott dropped more clothes into Bobby's arms. "Get moving."

"You're a slave driver, Slim!" Bobby protested, but started walking nonetheless. "Hey, Remy, Warren's here as well. He's been helping Hank with his research." Warren had changed these last few weeks and it was for the better. "Betsy's on the reserve list right now and no longer staying at the mansion." Bobby figured he should update Remy. "So Slim is moving in with you?"

"Oui..." Remy opened the door to his room and cringed at the mess he had left behind. He hadn't bothered to clean up before moving into the boathouse. "Drop everyt'in' on de chair, Bobby. I need to clean up first."

Bobby opened the curtains and Remy hissed softly as the bright sunlight hit his sensitive eyes. "Dere's a reason why I keep dem closed!"

"You're grumpy today." Bobby leaned against the wall and watched Remy put everything into its rightful place. He wanted to help, but had no idea where everything went. He would only create a bigger mess.

Going through the pile of Scott's clothes, he encountered the manipulated picture again and froze. He hoped that Scott wouldn't want it on the nightstand. He loved Jean, would always cherish her memory, but she was also competition and how could he compete with a ghost?

"It's sad really... Scott's a great parent, but he never got the chance to raise his kids. Rachel was already an adult when he met her and he never got to know Nate that well."

Bobby's words drove a knife through his heart. What if I make a pact wit' de devil and outsmart him? I could play Sinister like he played me. Non, I can' do dat. Sinister would win in de end. I'm only foolin' myself. I can' outsmart him, mais... Scott wants dis so bad and... I wanna give dis to him.

"Remy? What's going on?" He had been talking to Remy, but the Cajun wasn't responding,. The distant expression in Remy's eyes had him worried. "Was it something I said?"

"Non," Remy lied and began putting Scott's clothes away. "It's jus'... A lot has happened lately and I'm still tryin' to accept dat."

"I was scared when Creed had that hold on you. You attacked us. Scott and your father were so worried and they never left your side. We even had to force them to rest and eat occasionally. It surprised the hell out of me when Scott tried to get through to you by kissing you. I never suspected he liked men in that way." And he should have known, being gay himself. Seeing the discomfort in Remy's eyes, he switched topics again. "Warren, Hank and I are going to play some pool later... Maybe Scott and you will join us?"

"Mebbe," Remy said evasively. "Bobby, would you..."

"Leave you alone? Yeah, I guess you have a lot to do. Call me if you need any help!" Bobby's smile was partly faked, seeing the struggle in Remy's eyes. What was haunting the Cajun?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Remy? Don't take too long? I want to get some decent sleep tonight... Argh, why did I schedule a training session at seven in the morning?" Scott groaned, trying to lift Remy's dark mood. His lover had been brooding since they had returned to the mansion. At first he had blamed Storm and Rogue, because they were still avoiding Remy and their thoughts and emotions must be hurting the empath, but now he had the feeling that it was something that he had done. But he had no idea what he had done to upset the Cajun.

Remy stood in the doorway and was about to leave his room. Scott had already settled down in his bed, tucked beneath the comforter and he really wanted to join his lover, but he had to talk to Henri first. "I'll be back ASAP," he promised. "Go to sleep, cher." The confused expression on Scott's face warned him. "I'm just gonna get some fresh air..."

Scott allowed the lie, feeling Remy's restlessness in his mind. He doubted Remy fully realized that lying wasn't an option anymore. "Okay," he mumbled in the end, closing his eyes and trying to appear sleepy. Remy closed the door behind him and Scott was tempted to follow his lover to find out what Remy was hiding, but that implied he didn't fully trust Remy. Eventually, he decided to wait for his lover's return and if Remy was still restless then, he would address this issue.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Henri? Got a moment to talk?" Remy hesitated to enter the lab without permission; he didn't want to disturb precious research.

Hank looked up from his files, smiled and nodded his head invitingly. "Of course you can come inside. Have a seat, Remy. Would you like some coffee or tea?"

"Non, t'anks, I jus' wanna ask you somet'in'." Remy sat down opposite the Beast and averted his eyes. Confiding in Hank was a big step, and it scared him.

"What would you like to know?" Hank sipped his Earl Grey and waited for Remy to continue.

"Male pregnancy... is it possible?" Remy quickly looked up and captured Hank's gaze. Seeing the surprise in the other man's eyes, he shivered.

"And you want to know because...?"

"Scott wants chil'ren..." Remy bit his bottom lip.

"I never expected that question," Hank admitted, considering their subject matter. "To my knowledge it hasn't been done before. Well, there were experiments, but the fetus had to be aborted in all cases in the first four months. The male body isn't equipped to carry a child. Giving birth presents another problem. The child could only be born when the surgeon performs a caesarian section. There are too many risks involved."

Remy sighed, feeling disappointed. "So it's impossible?"

"I'm afraid so," Hank admitted. "Remy, did you discuss this with Scott?"

"Non." Remy felt shy all of a sudden. "Mais he told me he wanted chil'ren..."

"And he looks to you to give birth to them?" Hank frowned.

"He didn' say dat, mais... mebbe dis is all wrong..."

"What's wrong?" Growing worried, Hank leaned forward in his chair.

"Mebbe I should end dis relationship so he can date a femme. Dat way he can have chil'ren. I can' give him what he wants."

Hank proceeded cautiously. "I suggest you talk to Scott about your feelings. Don't shut him out, Remy. Scott won't see it the way you do. He's happy with you and if you really want children, I'm sure Scott wouldn't mind adopting them."

Remy rose to his feet. He considered this conversation over with now that Hank couldn't help him. "T'anks for your time, Henri. Won' bot'er you 'gain."

"Remy, it's not a bother. We all need someone to talk to about our most private problems."

"Merci." Remy walked to the doorway and stepped into the corridor. Henri can' help me... Sinister can...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy softly closed the door behind him, but one mental sweep told him that Scott was still awake, merde!

"Remy, come to bed? I don't want to spend my first night alone in here." Scott switched on the Jugendstill lamp on the nightstand. He had to admit that Remy had an excellent taste when it came to decorating his room.

Remy remained quiet, but took off his clothes. Naked, he slipped between the covers. Facing Scott, he allowed the other man to cover him with the comforter.

"Huh, you're cold, Remy. Come here." Scott pulled his lover close and used his own body heat to warm him. "Where have you been?" Remy had been away for nearly an hour.

"Jus' went for a walk, cher." He hoped that Scott wouldn't pressure him, but his lover's next words crushed that hope.

"Remy, you do realize that your empathy works both ways? I know you're lying. I don't know what you've been up to, but it wasn't just taking a walk." Scott held his breath as Remy tensed in his arms.

"Non, didn' realize dat..." Remy licked his lips, feeling guilty for lying to Scott in the first place. "Talked to Henri."

"Why? Aren't you feeling well? Are you hurting or...?" Concerned, Scott quickly checked on his lover, but couldn't find any injuries and Remy wasn't having a fever either.

"Jus' needed to talk to him, please, cher... let it be."

The pleading tone convinced Scott that this wasn't the right time to address this. "You'll tell me when you feel up to it?"

Remy nodded his head against Scott's shoulder. "I will."

"Okay..." Scott gave in, but reluctantly. His fingers roamed Remy's back, caressing the cold skin.

"Cher, I don' t'ink... I ain'..."

"I'm not thinking about sex," Scott chided his lover gently. He knew that Remy wasn't in the mood to make love; the link told him so. "But I can still touch and hold you, can't I?" Please say I can, Remy, because I need you close.

Remy received Scott's thoughts and nodded his head. "Mais oui, you can touch and hold me. It'll take me some time to get used to dis... knowin' you're in my head, knowin' what I want and don' want."

Scott gently brushed Remy's lips, succeeding in shutting him up. You know what your problem is? You worry too much, Remy. I love you...

Je t'aime... Remy confirmed. Rolling onto his other side, he encouraged Scott to spoon closely behind him.

"Stop wiggling..." Scott chuckled as Remy ground his ass against his groin. "You're making me hard..."

Remy smiled against the pillow. "Don' mind fallin' asleep like dat..." But his mood darkened, seeing the framed picture of Scott and his family in a distant corner of his room, almost hidden by his books and he was once more reminded of Scott's desire to have children.

"Try to get some sleep, darling. We got an early training session. Close your eyes and go to sleep." Remy's mood had darkened for no apparent reason and that worried Scott.

Remy closed his eyes, shutting the framed picture from his mind. Mebbe I need to talk to Sinister 'gain, mais Scott can' find out. He'd never want a chil' Sinister helped create. I got to keep dis a secret. A part of him couldn't believe he was actually considering asking Sinister for help, but what options did he have?

None.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sinister was surprised when Remy hesitantly called out to him. He hadn't expected his son to contact him this quickly. Abandoning his research for now, he opened a tesseract and took on Jean-Luc's appearance, but this time his eyes remained red and the diamond stayed on his brow. For some time now he had wondered in what appearance he should present himself to his son, but so far all he had come up with was Jean-Luc's form. His usual appearance upset Remy and reminded his son of the time when he had manipulated him.

After stepping into the tesseract he used his powers to locate his son. Finding Remy alone, he opened another tesseract and stepped onto the grass. They were no longer on the mansion's premises, just outside the gates and as he looked into his son's eyes, he found them dull and haunted. He had to stop himself from reaching out to Remy and fold an arm around him. This reaction was so unlike him that it actually shocked him. When he had still been Nathaniel Essex, he had loved his wife and son, but Adam had died and his wife... No, he stopped himself, unwilling to relive the pain that had consumed him back then. Making a pact with Apocalypse had been his way to deal with the pain. Apocalypse had taken the pain away, but with it he had also taken the last bit of his humanity. And Remy had given it back to him. Unintended, he compared Remy to Adam, realized what he was doing and stopped. Adam had died as a child and he had no way of knowing what kind of man Adam would have become. But Remy was here, alive and healthy and for some reason his son had initiated this contact. "Remy?"

Remy flinched, hearing his name. What had possessed him to make contact with Sinister? The scientist had used him before and wouldn't hesitate to use him again. But Sinister was his only chance! "Is your offer still valid?"

Sinister arched an eyebrow, momentarily confused. "What offer?"

Maybe he should reconsider and hurry back to the mansion. It wasn't too late to stop this. "De male pregnancy t'ing."

Sinister watched his son closely and saw the discomfort in the red on black eyes, his legacy. Remy's shields weren't at maximum and he felt his son's fear of being manipulated again, being lured into a trap. This was his chance to show Remy that he was sincere, that he had changed and could be trusted. "You really want to go through with this?"

"Oui, havin' a chil' means a lot to Scott and I love him too much to deny him." Remy peeked at Sinister's eyes, but they were impossible to read. It still took a lot of getting used to, seeing Sinister's red eyes and the diamond on Jean-Luc's brow.

Sinister wanted to talk this over in depth. "We should return to my laboratory, where I can show you the procedure. It involves a number of risks you should be aware of. Also, I need to do a physical exam on you to determine your present condition."

Getting cold feet, Remy backed away from Sinister. "Ain' goin' back to your lab!" Once he was in Sinister's lab, he would be at the scientist's mercy!

Sinister stared into Remy's eyes. "Listen to me, Remy. If you really want to do this you'll have to trust me. You're putting yourself at great risk by getting pregnant. I'll need to monitor you closely and you would have to see me every fourteen days so I can check on the progress you're making. If you can't do that, don't follow up on the idea. It could get you killed."

"I don' trust you..." Remy took another step away from Sinister. "You hurt me before... you 'ways betray me."

"Things have changed," Sinister started, reassuringly. "I have changed. You're an empath, Remy. Don't you feel it?"

"I can'... your shields are too strong. I can' tell what you're feelin'."

Sinister hadn't realized Remy couldn't sense his feelings. He had assumed their connection worked both ways. "Then I'll lower my shields."

Remy's breath caught. "I can' believe you said dat!" What game was Sinister playing this time?

Sinister nodded his head and lowered his shields to let Remy in. "See for yourself. I'll allow you to probe my feelings and I'll even open part of my memories for you. You'll be able to see for yourself that I changed and what brought on the change. Do you accept?"

Remy wasn't sure he should venture into Sinister's mind. It could be a trap!

"There's only one way to find out if I'm being sincere." Sinister raised his right hand and offered it to his son, trying to establish some physical contact.

Remy's hand trembled as he placed it in Sinister's, realizing he didn't really have a choice. As they made contact, the world around him faded to black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Nathaniel! Adam is dead! You have to accept that. You can't go against God's wish. He's dead. I want him back as well, but this goes against Nature. You can't do this, please, Nathaniel!"

"Be quiet, woman!" Enraged, Nathaniel Essex glared at his wife, Rebecca. "Our son just died! Adam was much too young to die; he was only a child! My research can give him back his life!" He cradled Adam's lifeless body in his arms. The doctors had been unable to save Adam and he had arrived too late, finding Adam dead. Rebecca was crying her eyes out, shaking, and barely keeping herself together. He had to be strong for both of them. "I'm taking him with me to my laboratory. Don't try to stop me!"

Determinedly, he descended the stairs to the basement and entered his laboratory. Many colleagues envied him because of his modern equipment and some thought he was collaborating with the devil. Their opinion mattered little to him. His knowledge, his research, would give Adam life. His son would live again and become a man, helping him unravel life's mysteries.

He placed Adam on an exam table and examined his son. This had to work! Frantically, he searched his desk for the formula, which he had developed these last few months. It was supposed to stimulate the heart and brains, bringing new life to Adam's dead body. He sat down on the exam table, rested his son's body against his, and parted the stiff lips. Slowly, he let a few drops of the elixir drip onto Adam's tongue. He believed in his research, this would work! His son wasn't supposed to die at this early age!

"Adam? Breathe for me... open your eyes. Breathe for your father... come back to us. Your mother wants you back in her arms!" He monitored his son closely and felt ecstatic when Adam shivered, drawing in oxygen. "Yes, son, you're doing excellently."

Adam shuddered. His eyes flashed open and he released one strangled scream. His eyes stared accusingly at his father who had brought him back from the dead. Tremors racked his body as his heart tried to pump cold blood through his veins.

"No!" Nathaniel screamed in pain as Adam's heart stopped beating once more. The young boy collapsed against him and he released another angry scream. "You can't take him away from me! You can't!" He was angry at creation, at God, the Devil; he blamed everyone and everything for taking his son away from him. His formula had only worked for a few seconds, and Adam had died a second time, this time in his arms. "No! No..." His screams weakened and became sobs. He should be upstairs, comforting Rebecca, but he couldn't pull away from his firstborn. Adam had been the light of his life.

"You don't possess the necessary knowledge to bring him back."

Startled, Nathaniel laid down his son and jumped to his feet. An abomination had appeared in his laboratory and he stared at the creature, whose skin was metallic. He had never seen anything like it before and shivered, staring into the cold eyes. "What are you? Leave me!"

"My name's Apocalypse and I can help you... In return you'll help me."

"Apocalypse?" Nathaniel's skin turned to gooseflesh in the presence of evil. "I won't do business with you. You're a demon!"

"A demon? No, I'm a mutant like you."

"A mutant?" Nathaniel shielded Adam's body from Apocalypse's view. He didn't know how this creature had entered his laboratory, but he wasn't taking any risks.

Apocalypse played his trump. "You know what other people think... what they feel. That makes you a mutant. Join me, join my cause and I'll give you power you can only dream of. You'll hold life and death in the palm of your hand. I need a man with your ambition, with your intelligence and slyness. Don't throw it all away for these puny humans. You may be a doctor, but both of us know you could be so much more!"

Shocked, Nathaniel stared at the incarnation of evil. "You're the devil, tempting me so that I will forsake my faith."

"What faith? Your precious God just took away your son and you still believe in Him? I'm more powerful than He is! I can give you the power over life and death!"

Nathaniel stared at his son's corpse. This creature was right. His God had forsaken him; had taken away his only son.

"What do you have to lose?" Apocalypse took one step closer to Nathaniel. "Accept my offer and you can stop death in its tracks. I'll fill your mind with knowledge you only dreamt of! I know the secrets of the universe. Don't be a fool, accept my offer." Apocalypse extended his hand. "Accept my offer, Essex."

Nathaniel rocked Adam one last time, making his decision. Apocalypse was right. God had forsaken him and why should he believe in such a cruel god? Apocalypse offered him knowledge, the power to stop death! And wasn't that what he had always wanted? To conquer death?

Nathaniel's hand trembled as he placed it in Apocalypse's, realizing he didn't really have a choice. As they made contact, the world around him faded to black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why? What are you doing to me?" Nathaniel screamed as a sharp pain crawled across his skin. It burned infernally and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Apocalypse's powers flowed around him, cocooned him and his agony grew worse. His skin! His skin was burning, leaving metal in its place. Shocked, he stared at Apocalypse, who was laughing loudly. "Stop it!"

"No, you accepted my offer and this is the price you have to pay for your knowledge. I can't take any risks."

Nathaniel whimpered as the metal stretched out over his body, covering every inch of skin, replacing it. His eyes burned as well and he tried to close them, but Apocalypse yanked him back to his feet.

"Look at your reflection!" Apocalypse pushed him closer to a mirror, holding his prey in place. "Look!"

Shaking, he stared at his reflection. His eyes had turned red and a red diamond had appeared on his brow. "What did you do to me?"

"We're not finished yet!" Apocalypse grinned and raised his right hand.

Nathaniel yelped as Apocalypse's fingers settled on his head, reaching inside his mind, his soul, ripping it apart. "No..."

"I can't allow you to betray me. Your feelings make you unreliable... I'll take them away... You won't be an empath any longer... I'll leave your telepathy intact..."

Apocalypse probed Essex's mind deeper, until he found what he was looking for, then brutally tore his mind apart. Nathaniel screamed, collapsed on the floor and remained motionless. Satisfied, Apocalypse waited for his new ally to rise to his feet. The transformation was complete. While ripping the empathy from Essex's mind he had filled the scientist's mind with unspeakable knowledge. "Rise..."

Adroitly, he rose from the floor, pushing himself to his feet. Stretching his body, he tasted the power and his eyes glowed intensely, mentally reviewing all the knowledge he had gained. Respectfully, he bowed his head. "Master..."

Pleased, Apocalypse studied him. "You need a new name... You're no longer Nathaniel Essex... You're Mister Sinister..."

"Yes, Sinister..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy glanced at Essex, standing opposite him. "Would you... would you... You ain' Jean-Luc and I don' wanna see you as Sinister eit'er. Could you, would you... show yourself as Nat'aniel Essex?" It was his way of reaching out to the other man. He didn't get a verbal answer, but the form in front of him faded, then grew solid again. Cocking his head, he studied Nathaniel Essex. "Dis is you?"

"Yes, this is who I used to be, before I made my unholy pact with Apocalypse."

Remy suddenly realized that their hands were still clasped. I've got to trust my instincts, even if dey're misguidin' me.

Remy hesitated, but then set aside his doubt and fear. "Oui, I trust you..." He might get hurt in the end, but at least he was making this decision of his own free will.

"Then we'll continue this at my lab." He opened a tesseract and waited for Remy to make up his mind.

Remy nodded his head firmly and followed his father into the tesseract.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy almost regretted trusting Essex when he found himself at his father's laboratory. It had only taken a few selected memories for him to change his mind and here he was, in the lion's den. One of the things that had made him decide to trust Essex was the fact that the other man had been an empath before Apocalypse had gotten his hands on him. It had strengthened their fragile bond and he hoped his father understood how hard it was to trust again.

Sinister, still in the guise of Nathaniel Essex, walked toward the exam table. "Please sit down," he said, pointing at the exam table. "I need to run some tests on you before I can tell how successful a male pregnancy will be. I also want to stress the risks you're running when you proceed with this."

In spite of everything, Remy smiled. Essex seemed determined to explain these risks to him. Did his father really care about him? Until a few days ago he would have thought it impossible. Suddenly, his smile died. A terrible pain sliced his mind in two and he clutched his head between his hands. "What's dat?" His voice shook with pain and he fortified his defenses. Slowly, the pain faded.

"It's nothing," Essex said, dismissing it. "Don't pay it any attention. Now lie down and try to relax."

Remy flinched as Essex attached several electrodes to his brow.

"Remove your shirt."

His hands trembled, obeying that order, but he unbuttoned his shirt. Essex proceeded to attach more electrodes to his chest.

"You must realize that every pregnancy, male or female, carries great risks. When the time of birth comes I'll have to perform a Caesarian section

and that brings with it its own risks."

"What do I do?" He was determined to see this through and held still when Essex took several blood samples.

"You won't notice any changes the first two weeks, then morning sickness might hit. Expect all normal conditions that accompany pregnancy."

"Like what?"

"Like food cravings, mood swings and nausea. You'll need to rest regularly and I'll prescribe you hormone pills, which will aid the fetus' development." Essex wiped away the few droplets of blood on Remy's arm after taking a blood sample and checked the monitor. "You're in a good shape..."

"How will you do it? Do you need anyt'in'? My DNA or...?" Remy grew silent, suddenly realizing what he was doing. Could he trust Essex? Could he?

Essex looked at him thoughtfully. Was his old empathy stirring? Impossible. Apocalypse had ripped his empathy from him, but... he certainly felt something. "I have everything I need."

"So when are you gonna do it? Now?" Remy wasn't sure he wanted to do this right now. Maybe he needed to think everything over and then reach a well-balanced decision, but would Essex give him that time?

Essex eyed his son closely. "Not now. I want you to think this over very carefully. This is an important decision. Talk it over with Scott. You don't have to mention me, but tell him what you want to do. You'll need his support if you're going to follow through and maybe... maybe Scott doesn't want you to risk your life to have his child. This involves two people, Remy."

Remy blinked his eyes. Did he really say dat? Mon Dieu, I can' tell Scott. Once Scott knows Henri doesn' t'ink it possible, he'll wanna know who's guidin' me and he won' want anyt'in' to do wit' me or de chile. His shields were still strong and Essex hadn't received those thoughts. "I'll t'ink 'bout it."

"Good. I need to study your DNA and Scott's to make sure the baby will be healthy." Essex removed the electrodes. Remy looked tired, exhausted.

Remy had momentarily dropped his shields and the agony assaulted him once more. Someone close was in a terrible pain. Following his instincts, he got up from the exam table and started for the corridor.

"Remy, where are you going?" Essex followed his son.

"Who's in pain?" Remy locked eyes with his father and flinched. Nathaniel Essex's eyes stared back at him, not Sinister's red ones. Maybe he should stop referring to him as Sinister and use Essex instead? Or would he be deluding himself?

Essex shrugged his shoulders, knowing whose pain Remy was picking up. "It's only Creed."

"Creed?" Shocked, Remy halted in his tracks. "Why is he hurtin'?" Suddenly, he felt less safe than he had felt a minute ago. Too vividly he remembered how he had felt when Creed's instincts had ruled him. "What's he doin' here?" Suspiciously, he looked about.

"He's my prisoner. You don't have to worry about your safety." Remy had started walking again, honing in on Creed's pain and he didn't have a choice but to follow Remy.

"Your prisoner?" Confused, Remy looked up, trying to make sense of this new information. "I t'ought he worked for you."

"He hurt you..."

The simple admission caused Remy's heart to skip a beat. Freezing in his tracks, he locked eyes with his father. "What?"

"He hurt you... I can't allow that. It's partly my fault that he managed to get hold of you. I should have dealt with him when he assaulted you here at my lab." He had only been just in time to stop Creed from molesting Remy.

Remy's eyes grew big. "I don' understand." He didn't. He really didn't understand. "Why is he in pain?"

Essex sighed, resigned. "Walk on." He opened the door to the storage facility where Creed's tank was situated. He guided Remy to the right tank and then watched his son's face.

"Mon Dieu..."

Electricity shook Creed's body and his face contorted in pain. Seeing that he had visitors, Creed placed his hands against the tank and pleadingly stared at them. He didn't expect any mercy from Sinister, but maybe LeBeau would help him. Another bolt of electricity shocked his body and he released a mute scream. Please, please help me... the pain... He had never begged before, but the pain...! The jolt almost killed him time and time again, and then his healing factor kicked in, making sure he survived the next jolt as well... endless torture.

"Please stop it... stop it... de pain..." Remy's watering eyes sought out his father's. "Please, dis is monstrous. I can understand dat you don' want him loose, mais you can' do dis..." Remy flinched every time Creed's body was subjected to another jolt. "Stop dis..."

I've grown soft... I can't deny him. How did this happen? Essex raised his hand and switched off the electricity. "Is this what you want? He deserves to suffer, you know."

Remy slowly shook his head. "No man deserves dis kinda pain, not even Creed."

Creed had listened to their exchange and couldn't believe LeBeau had chosen to help him. Had the torture really stopped? He couldn't remember a time when he had felt this grateful. Thanks...

Remy ignored Creed and looked at Essex. "Promise me you won' turn it on 'gain after I’ve left. You asked me to trust you... Prove to me dat you're serious."

Essex wondered about his eagerness to please his son. When had Remy become the most important person in his life? Was his empathy returning and if it was, how would Apocalypse react to that news? "I won't switch it on again."

"Merci..." Remy nervously licked his lips. "Merci... Essex?" He added the name hesitantly, unsure how Essex would react. To his surprise, the other man smiled.

"Essex... I'd prefer Nathan, that's how Rebecca used to call me... several lifetimes ago." Feeling melancholy, he realized what he had lost when he had turned his back on Rebecca.

"Nat'an... bien..." Remy smiled shyly. Had he really gained a father?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What's going on? You've been preoccupied all day long." Concerned, Scott sat down beside his lover on the couch in the living room. They were alone in here, and he deemed it safe to discuss this matter right now instead of waiting until they had retreated to Remy's room for the night. He still wondered where Remy had gone most of the day. For some hours, Remy had disappeared from the face of the earth. None of the security cameras had been able to locate him. Remy had told him that he had gone for a walk, but Scott didn't buy it. "You're brooding."

"Jus' t'inking, cher," Remy said evasively. All day long he had been thinking about Essex's words. A male pregnancy was possible, but risky. He wish he could discuss this with Scott, but his lover would never agree to this as long as Sinister was involved. Non, not Sinister, Nat'an. I have to stop t'inkin' of him as Sinister. He changed...

"Remy? Can I ask you something personal?" Scott leaned in closer and manhandled Remy until his lover was lying down and Remy's head resting in his lap. Soothingly, he stroked the soft hair, instinctively feeling his lover's emotional turmoil.

"What do you wanna know?" Remy relaxed in spite of his problems. Scott's soothing caresses calmed him down.

"Why are you shielding your thoughts? I haven't been able to read your thoughts all day long. Is something wrong? Did I do something that upset you?" Scott held his breath in fearful anticipation. "I want this relationship to work. Please tell me if it's something I did."

Remy instantly felt guilty. "Sorry, cher. You didn' do anyt'ing wron'," he quickly assured his lover. "I was t'inking 'bout Sinister posin' as Jean-Luc and what to make of it. It's kinda... private." He hated feeding Scott white lies, but he needed the privacy right now.

"I guess that makes sense." Scott didn't feel convinced though. "Are you going to talk to Jean-Luc?"

"The next time he calls, oui. I asked him to gimme some time to t'ink."

"What will you do about Sinister?"

Remy tried hard not to flinch. "Avoid him?" Lying to Scott made him feel guilty. He wanted to confide in his lover, tell him that they were going to have a baby, but he couldn't. "I'm sorry I neglected you." Remy raised his hand and cupped the back of Scott's neck in his palm, slowly pushing his lover's lips closer to his. Claiming them, he tried to forget about Sinister, no Nathan, the pregnancy and Scott's desire to have children. He had to be more careful in the future; apparently Scott didn't like it when he hid his thoughts from his lover. Mais I made up my mind 'ready anyway... I wanna make Scott happy... I'm followin' t'rough. De next time Sini... Nat'an and I meet I'll tell him to proceed. I wanna have Scott's child... I really do.

"You discussed this with Scott?" Essex waited for Remy to lie down on the exam table and probed his son's troubled thoughts. It was a pity that Remy's shields were this strong; it almost felt like the young man was trying to hide something from him, but he didn't want to pressure Remy in to telling him what was wrong. He had to move slowly and carefully if he wanted to gain Remy's complete trust.

"Oui, and Scott agrees." Remy avoided his father's eyes. He still had to get used to seeing Essex instead of Sinister. The changed appearance did make things easier though.

Essex studied his son closely and his unease increased. Suddenly, he felt reluctant to follow through. "You did discuss this with Scott, didn't you?"

"Oui." It took every ounce of Remy's courage to look his father in the eyes. "I did."

Essex decided not to push. "I already told you that this involves surgery. The fetus will need space to develop and I have to create an artificial skin fold. I will do that after anaesthetizing you."

Remy gasped; he hadn't known he needed to be anaesthetized. "Can' I stay conscious?"

"I advice against it. Remy. Trust me on this."

We're back to de trust t'ing 'gain. Do I trust him? But he had made that decision when he had agreed to this. "Do it."

Essex nodded his head, but... " You and Scott discussed the risks involved? He knows this can kill you?"

Remy's eyes narrowed. "Jus' do it."

Essex was too eager to make everything up to Remy to question the emotional turmoil in his son's mind. Slowly, he placed the oxygen mask over Remy's mouth and nose, and within seconds the young man was asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sleepily, Remy opened his eyes. His head felt heavy and he wanted to go back to sleep, but a voice was telling him to wake up. Unable to ignore the annoying voice, he tried to focus on his surroundings. At first, he didn't recognize the man standing at his bed, but suddenly he remembered that Sinister took on Essex's form whenever he was close. Thirsty, he licked his lips. "Sin..." Correcting himself, he said, "Nat'an?"

'Everything went perfectly," he assured Remy. "You're pregnant."

Remy blinked his eyes in disbelief. Automatically, his hand moved to his abdomen, looking for a change. But his abdomen was still flat and he didn't feel any different. He didn't know what he had expected, but this wasn't it... feeling normal. "Everyt'in' feels de same."

"Of course it does," Essex said, amused. "What did you expect? To be nine months pregnant upon waking up? You won't notice anything for another few weeks. Then you should prepare for food cravings, mood swings, headaches... everything that accompanies pregnancy." He helped Remy sit upright and watched as his son lifted his shirt to study his abdomen.

"I don' see a t'ing... did you really do it? I still feel de same."

"Trust me, you're pregnant." Essex even chuckled softly. Although he had offered to tell Remy about the procedure that would leave him pregnant, his son had refused to discuss it and he wasn't going to bring it up again. "You have to take good care of yourself for the next nine months." And Summers better keep you safe... "You'll check in with me every fourteen days. If something happens that worries you, contact me right away. We can't rule out a miscarriage, Remy."

Remy swallowed hard, only now realizing he was pregnant. How de hell am I gonna explain dis to Scott? I t'ought dat keepin' everyt'in' a secret was de best way to approach dis, mais what do I do when I start to show? I can' hide dis from Scott! What possessed me to do dis? He'll be mad as hell when he finds out I did dis behind his back. He'll be even more furious when he finds out 'bout Essex's involvement. I should have t'ought dis t'rough before takin' dis step, mais it's too late now. Dere's a new life inside of me.

"Remy?" Worried, Essex sought out his son's eyes. Damn those tight shields! He could probably force himself a way into Remy's mind, but his rediscovered conscience stopped him. He couldn't violate Remy's mind like that! "Do you want to rest a little longer? You still seem rather groggy."

"What's de time?" How much time had past since he had left Scott with some dumb and illogical excuse? Mon Dieu, Scott's gonna figure it out... He'll feel betrayed... Mebbe it's not too late yet to tell him what I've done, mais will he listen? Will he forgive me? Will I lose him?

Essex covered Remy with a blanket and encouraged his son to lie down again. "Surgery only took one hour."

Remy sighed, relieved. In that case he could rest a little longer. "Wake me in t'irty?"

Essex nodded his head; worried, but unable to pin down the source of his unease. Watching Remy sleep, he wished he could reveal himself to Scott and talk to his son's lover, but that wasn't an option right now. He had to trust Remy and hope that his son knew what he was doing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scott watched his lover sleep and tried to label the worries that haunted him. Whenever Remy looked at him, the red on black eyes were hooded, hiding things from him. Lately, Remy was locking him out and shielding his thoughts. Something had come between them and he had to find out what it was before it tore them apart. Remy was too precious to lose and he couldn't envision a life without the Cajun.

Hey Remy, are you awake? He decided to approach his lover telepathically, trying to recapture their former closeness. Remy stirred, and encouraged, Scott caressed his lover's soft skin. Remy? We need to talk.

Remy finally opened his eyes and locked with Scott's. He had felt Scott's growing concern these last few weeks and he knew what to do to repair this situation, but he lacked the necessary courage. He was five weeks pregnant now and he felt the first stirrings of a new life inside him. He cherished that sensation and he didn't know how to tell Scott the truth. "What's wron', cher?" He chose to respond verbally, ducking the intimacy of telepathic speech.

Remy flinched, realizing Scott was going to push it this time. "Cher, please..." He never managed to end that sentence and quickly covered his mouth with his right hand. His stomach contracted and he gulped, fighting the urge to throw up.

"Remy?" Concerned, Scott rubbed his lover's back.

But the touch brought no relief and Remy jumped up from the bed and ran into the bathroom where he dropped to his knees. Holding onto the porcelain bowl, he emptied his stomach and suffered through an exhausting round of dry heaves. Mon Dieu, it hurts! His throat hurt, his stomach continued to convulse and cold sweat poured from his pores.

I don' wanna scare you, cher... He felt miserable. Essex had warned him about the morning sickness, but he hadn't thought it would be this severe. How was he going to explain this to Scott?

Scott helped his lover to his feet and put some toothpaste onto Remy's toothbrush before handing it to the younger man. Here. you'll feel better after you got rid of that awful taste!

Merci. Remy brushed his teeth and rinsed with mouthwash. Would this happen every morning? He wasn't sure he could handle this. How did he get himself in these situations?

"Come on, let's get you back in to bed." Scott led Remy back to the bed and made sure his lover was resting comfortably. After tucking the comforter around Remy's form, he closely studied his lover. Something was wrong, very wrong.

"You scheduled a trainin' session dis mornin'." He wasn't sure he could participate, but he would try, for Scott.

"You're staying in bed, Remy, and I'll ask Hank to check on you. I want to make sure there's nothing seriously wrong with you." Remy started to protest, but Scott firmly shook his head. You're too important to me. Don't you dare say that nothing is wrong with you!

Remy stayed silent, safely nestled in a warm cocoon and he didn't feel like arguing. Mais Henri doesn' need to examine me, cher. It's probably jus' de stomach flu.

Realizing that Scott wouldn't give in, Remy reluctantly nodded his head. He didn't know yet what he was going to tell Henri; the truth or white lies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Remy? Can I come inside? Scott wants me to talk to you." Hank couldn't label his unease. When Scott had told him about Remy's nausea this morning he had been inclined to dismiss it as a bad reaction to something Remy had eaten the night before, but the unease had only increased during the day. So now he found himself knocking on Remy's door, hoping the Cajun would let him in.

"Henri? Is dat you? I'm bien..." Remy struggled into a sitting position. He had been peacefully asleep until Hank had woken him. Merde, he had hoped Scott wouldn't mention this morning's incident to Hank. Wishful t'inkin'!

"I'm coming inside," Hank announced and he opened the door to Remy's room.

"Merde!" Remy wondered about his game plan. It was best if he appeared fit and lying in bed wasn't helping. He was in the midst of getting to his feet when a large blue hand settled on his shoulder. Instinctively, he tightened his shields and avoided locking eyes with Hank. During these last few hours he had grown accustomed to the sensation of new life in his body.

"Remy?" Hank studied the Cajun, wondering why Remy wouldn't meet his eyes. "How are you feeling right now?"

"I'm bien," Remy repeated. He still refused to make eye contact, trying to figure out his next move. He wasn't ready yet to tell the truth and Scott deserved to be the first one to hear it. And den Scott can decide if he wants dis chile... if he wants de ot'ers to know. Tellin' Henri now ain' right.

"Scott said you're feeling nauseous."

"I did, mais not any more. Must be somet'in' I ate last night. Mebbe it's de stomach flu. On de news dey said dat it was goin' 'round." He forced himself to meet Hank's eyes while tightly locking his thoughts and feelings away. Although he desperately wanted to tell someone that a new life was blossoming inside him, he couldn't tell Hank.

"I would like to run some tests on you, Remy. Why don't you accompany me to the lab?"

"Non, don' t'ink so, Henri. I'm stayin' here, gonna ride it out until I feel betta."

"Remy..."

He heard the warning in Hank's voice, but Remy shook his head. "Non, Henri, I ain' gonna submit to your li'l tests. It's jus' de flu."

Hank sighed. "You're too stubborn for your own good." He hoped the Cajun wouldn't get worse, but if Remy did, Scott and he would drag Remy to the lab kicking and screaming if necessary.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Merci mon Dieu, for lettin' Scott have monitor duty in de mornin' dis week. Dat way he doesn' see me t'row up every mornin'. He was really lucky that Scott left the bed at five and the morning sickness never hit before nine. That gave him sufficient time to drag himself into the bathroom and empty his stomach. It was becoming a pattern now, waking up, throw up and then crawl into bed again, and the pattern had been repeating itself for the last five days. Two more days and Scott would find out that 'the stomach flu' had never gone away.

He had kept his appointment with Essex yesterday and his father had assured him that everything was perfectly normal, including the morning sickness, headaches and backaches. Fortunately, Essex had given him some pills that should deal with the nausea. The meds needed a few days to take effect, but then the morning sickness would hopefully be gone. Essex however, had also told him that he had to suffer through the little body aches and pains.

Curling onto his side, he wrapped his arms around his waist, subconsciously trying to protect the new life inside him. Essex hadn't told him the gender of the child and he didn't want to know. All life was precious to him, especially now that it was flourishing inside him.

Hank had left him alone and had stopped pushing him for tests. Remy usually managed to hide his nausea until he had reached a bathroom and Hank had no idea what was really going on.

"Li'l one, I'll keep you safe, I promise. I'll love you, be dere for you every step of de way." Something inside him stirred, as if responding to his promise, but that was impossible. It was way too early for the fetus to understand. He was imagining things, hoping the fetus was developing correctly. Essex had warned him that he might have a miscarriage, but he refused to consider that possibility. The child would be strong and healthy.

Hush, li'l one, Remy will take care of you... He dismissed the sensation that he wasn't alone. Somehow it felt like another presence was making itself comfortable in his mind. Can' be de chile... I'm only six weeks... can' be de chile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scott was feeling nervous. Remy had asked him to spend the night at the boathouse instead of the mansion and in his book, that meant trouble. During the last few days he had noticed that Remy was trying harder to recapture the former closeness between them, but something kept the Cajun back and he hoped that everything would come into the open. Remy probably didn't think he knew that his lover was still throwing up in the morning, but he knew what had happened when he entered the bathroom and found that Remy had cleaned it. He cleaned it to eradicate the evidence; that he threw up after I left for monitor duty. He had been hesitant to bring it up, because Remy didn't like being fussed over, but it greatly worried him. Then there were the headaches Remy was complaining about, which only added to his concern. Yes, they were going to discuss this tonight and he hoped Remy was ready to talk about it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scott smiled, pleasantly surprised that Remy was using telepathy to greet him. His lover was dressed in a warm woolen sweater, jeans and yet he still shivered.

Come inside, cher. Dinner's almost ready. He felt far more nervous than he wanted Scott to know. So much depended on their conversation tonight! Scott went into the kitchen and sat down at the kitchen table while Remy gave the Gumbo one more last stir. Hungry, cher?

Scott nodded his head. Remy had made Gumbo once or twice since they were together and he liked the dish. "So why did you want to meet me here?"

Remy placed the bowls on the kitchen table and sat down opposite Scott. Dis is it. Mon Dieu, I'm so nervous, mais I'm doin' de right t'ing. Dis is Scott's chile as well. He needs to know. In retrospect, I should never have done dis wit'out Scott's okay... He carefully shielded this thoughts; he didn't want Scott to find out accidentally.

"Remy, the Gumbo is excellent, but I don't think that's why you asked me to come here." He placed his utensils on the table and captured one of Remy's hands in his. Lately, his love and affection for the Cajun had grown to new levels. I didn't know it was possible to love you more, but I do. Now tell me what's worrying you.

Remy fidgeted with the fabric of his sweater. Scott gently squeezed his right hand and Remy sighed, placing his other hand on Scott's, confirming their connection. "I did somet'in' stupid, cher."

Scott's heart skipped a beat. Shit, what's this about? Remy... "What did you do?" He rubbed the knuckles of Remy's hand, trying to reassure his lover that they could deal with everything.

"Mon Dieu, it's harder dan I t'ought..." Remy licked his lips, averted his eyes and stared at their hands. "Do you remember talkin' 'bout havin' chil'ren?"

Scott nodded his head. Hank had hinted that Remy had asked him about the possibility of a male pregnancy, and Hank had also mentioned the disappointment in Remy's eyes when he had told him it was impossible. "Remy, yeah, it's true. I want children, but we can adopt. We're men, we can't get pregnant and that's one aspect of being in a gay relationship that I fully accept..."

"Mais I couldn' accept it..." Remy trembled, nervously. "I'm pregnant, cher."

"What?" Scott frowned. "What did you say?" Remy couldn't be saying what he thought he was saying!

"I'm carryin' our chile, cher..." Remy peeked at Scott's face. Reaching out empathically, he quickly retreated, feeling Scott's shock.

"You're serious, aren't you? My God, Remy, what did you do?" Scott stared at his lover in complete disbelief. Now certain things made sense. "That wasn't the stomach flu... It was morning sickness and the headaches... But I still don't understand. How can you be pregnant? It's impossible!"

"I had some help," Remy admitted in a tiny tone. Scott hadn't pushed him away yet and he was growing hopeful that his lover would accept this situation.

"Help? From Hank?"

"Non..." Remy cringed. He didn't want to tell Scott the truth, but he had no choice. "I wanted to make you happy, cher, and Henri told me a male pregnancy was impossible, so I turned to someone else..."

"Who?" Scott held his breath. Remy's tension was obvious and his lover seemed ready to bolt any moment now.

"I went to see... Essex." Remy whispered the words, freed his hand and wrapped his arms around his waist.

"Essex?" Briefly, Scott felt confused. "Who's..." Then he realized the truth and jumped from the chair. "You went to see Sinister? You went behind my back? I can't believe you would do that! You of all people should know better than to trust Sinister!" Shocked, he turned away from Remy and paced the kitchen, raving softly. "Sinister created..." He lacked the words to voice his shock.

"I don' know exactly how he did it," Remy admitted. "I only know dat he used your DNA and mine. De chile is ours..." Remy softly rubbed his abdomen in an effort to reassure himself. Scott wouldn't abandon them. "Please, cher, you must understand. You wanted a family so badly and Nat'an said..."

"Nathan?" Scott turned around, stared at Remy and shook his head. "What the hell is going on here?" It was quite a shock to find out that his lover, his male lover, was pregnant courtesy of his old nemesis. Yes, Sinister had helped Remy to rid himself of Creed, but he didn't trust the scientist that much. "You know what he wants the child for? He wants it because he can add the child's DNA to his gene pool! And Nathan? What's that about? It's Sinister! One of our enemies!"

"He's also my fat'er, cher..." Remy's words were barely audible. He had suffered through Scott's raving, knowing he deserved it. "He's changed, cher. His empat'y is back and..."

"His empathy?" Suddenly reality hit Scott hard. They are father and son! I can't believe Remy did this behind my back! "Why didn't you tell me? Ask me if I was okay with it?"

"I wanted to make you happy," Remy mumbled, feeling guilty. "I acted on impulse and den it was too late..."

"Pregnant, you're pregnant with our child and Sinister...?"

"Nat'an is monitorin' me closely. So far everyt'in' is goin' jus' bien. I hoped you'd be happy..." Tears hid in his red on black eyes, but he managed to keep them back. "Cher, did I lose you?"

"Remy, I need some time to process this..." It was too much in too little time. Scott headed for the doorway, opened the door and stepped outside. Remy got to his feet to follow him, but he raised his right hand, stopping the Cajun. "Don't. I need time alone to work through this." He gave Remy a stern look. "Stay here and don't do anything stupid while I'm gone. I'll be back." He closed the door behind him and marched away from the boathouse. He's pregnant... Remy's pregnant with our child and Sinister... The bastard played him again! Fuck! Furious, he headed for the mansion. Maybe demolishing some training robots would help him see things more clearly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In shock, Remy settled down on the couch. Scott had left, was that a good or a bad sign? He said he'd be back. I jus' have to wait. Dis is my fault anyway... He gently rubbed his abdomen, knowing the fetus was growing stronger every day. Also, the presence in his mind felt strong and expanding. So far he had successfully avoided thinking about the child's possible mutant powers. He couldn't rule out that he felt the first stirrings of telepathic, maybe even empathic life.

The headache returned with a vengeance and he lay down, pulling the quilt that covered the back of the couch with him. Fighting down another bout of nausea, he managed to stay calm. Would he spend the rest of his pregnancy like this? Alone and miserable? Non, Scott loves me... loves me... he won' leave me...

Emotionally drained, he closed his eyes and allowed himself to fall asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Remy? Remy!"

The voice and the loud banging on the door woke him from his slumber. Remy opened his eyes, stretched, and got to his feet. Taking the quilt with him, he opened the door. "Henri?" He was surprised to see McCoy on his doorstep. Merde! Scott probably sent him! I wanted to keep dis between us and now he told Henri!

"Remy, can I come inside?"

"Naturelement." Like he had a choice! He headed back to the couch and collapsed on it. "Scott sent you, didn' he?"

Hank nodded his head. "He's concerned about you and asked me to talk to you." Hank raised an eyebrow. "You don't look very well, my Acadian friend. Maybe a warm drink will help? Hot milk is said to soothe the nerves."

Listlessly, Remy shrugged his shoulders. "Dere's some milk in the fridge." He wasn't thirsty, but maybe the warm drink would help.

Hank entered the kitchen and warmed some milk. He kept a close eye on the Cajun while pouring the milk into the mug. Making sure Remy wasn't watching him, he added some white powder to the milk and then stirred.

Remy was huddled beneath the quilt, doing his best to lock Hank out. His own emotions were upsetting him and he didn't want to deal with Hank's as well. "Merci," he whispered, as Hank handed him the mug. Once it had cooled down, he sipped from it. "Tastes funny." He arched an eyebrow, unable to identify the alien taste.

Hank smiled reassuringly. "There's nothing wrong with it. Maybe your taste buds are still trying to recover from the Gumbo you made?"

"Funny..." Remy sipped again, but the odd taste was still there. "Henri, mon ami..." He froze, seeing the insane gleam in Hank's eyes. His instincts kicked in and alarmed, he reached out. Henri? Henri... Mon Dieu... Hank's mind felt... off. The texture of the mind was different. It was vile and... His eyes grew huge, realizing he wasn't sitting opposite McCoy. "Dark Beast..."

Dark Beast bared his teeth and grinned. "You drank more than enough, LeBeau. It's only a matter of seconds now..."

His eyes almost popped from their sockets, feeling the sedative rush through his veins. "You... you..." Unable to finish the sentence, he dropped to one side. His eyes closed, and his body shivered as he lost consciousness.

Dark Beast moved quickly, placed the mug on the coffee table and picked up his victim, draping him over his shoulder. "Apocalypse will be pleased."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warren frowned, wondering why Scott was fighting the training robots like a possessed man. Okay, Slim, you helped me in the past, looks like it's my turn to help you. He shut down the training program and ignored the furious growl that came from inside the Danger Room. Steeling himself for whatever had upset Scott he entered the Danger Room and walked up to his friend. "Slim? We need those training robots. It's bad enough Logan wreaks havoc here every so often, if you start doing it as well..." He hoped the teasing would work and relax Scott. But the angry expression on Scott's face remained.

"Start the program again," Scott ordered. He still needed to get rid of his remaining anger.

"We might try talking." Warren rested a hand on his friend's shoulder and steered Scott outside. "Let's sit down and talk." His room was closest and would guarantee their privacy. Scott reluctantly allowed it, but crossed his arms defensively and Warren shook his head. "What's this tantrum about, Slim? I don't recognize you like this."

"Remy did something without my knowledge and..." Scott's voice trailed off. "I still have trouble believing he did what he did."

"And what was that?" Warren wasn't sure Scott would entrust his secrets to him, but he had to try. "I'm good at keeping secrets." Hell, he had known about Sinister helping Remy to find a way out of his depression and he hadn't told on the Cajun!

"It's something private," Scott said evasively.

"Remy has looked bad these last few days. Does this have anything to do with his health?" Warren sat down opposite Scott and rested his feet on the coffee table. "Scott, we go back a long way, you and I. If you can't trust me, you won't be able to talk to anyone else either. Nothing you say will ever leave this room. You look like you desperately need to talk to someone."

Scott considered Warren's words and found them true. "Remy sought out Sinister behind my back."

Warren shrugged his shoulders; he had expected something like that. "And that surprises you? They're father and son. I can understand Remy. I would have wanted to know more about a father I had never known."

"But he plays Remy time and time again and Remy always ends up hurt!"

"Scott, you can't protect Remy from himself... And I doubt Sinister is the same maniac we knew. Yeah, he took Creed with him when he left that last time, but I doubt he faked his concern where Remy was concerned."

Scott released a surprised sigh. "How can you say that? Sinister created the Marauders! You know what they did to the Morlocks and to your wings!"

"I have had a long time to think this over, Slim. I blamed Remy for the loss of my wings and in the end I finally realized I was blaming the wrong person. Hodge took my wings... Scott, I’ve made mistakes myself. When I was Death, I wasn't myself. Apocalypse told me what to do and I followed his orders. I don't know what possessed Sinister to make a deal with Apocalypse, but I'm not condemning anyone anymore before I know the whole story." Warren's frown deepened. "I don't believe you're mad at Remy just because he contacted his father."

"There's more," Scott admitted with a strangled sigh. He had to make his decision now; could he count on Warren to keep this a secret? Yes. And he desperately needed to talk to someone. "Remy's pregnant with my child."

"What?" Warren's eyes widened. Mouth agape, he stared at Scott in disbelief. "He's what?"

"Hank told him that a male pregnancy was impossible so he went to Sinister."

Warren shook his head. "Why would Remy want to carry your child? I mean, we're men! Men don't give birth!"

Frustrated, Scott banged his fist into the coffee table. "I told him I wanted children... I was thinking about adoption, but Remy... He just now told me."

"That's why you were in the Danger Room." Warren considered his next words. "Scott, I can't say I understand why Remy did it, but shouldn't you be with him right now? To talk things through? If you're feeling like this, imagine how confused he must feel!" Warren got to his feet and opened the door. He still didn't understand why Remy was this determined to carry Scott's child, but Scott running away from the facts wasn't helping. "Go to Remy and talk this over. You're going to be a father, Scott..." Remy pregnant? If it wasn't the truth it would be hilarious! He had never heard of a male pregnancy before, but it certainly sounded like something the Cajun could pull off.

Scott got to his feet, but didn't approach the doorway. "I don't think that's a good idea, Warren. I'm still mad and I don't know what I'll do."

"Slim, do you love Remy?" Warren could hardly believe he was having this conversation! "Do you?"

"Yeah, I love him..."

Something in Scott's face softened and Warren smiled approvingly. "Do you think you'll love your child?"

Scott swallowed hard. "Yeah, I think so."

"Then what's the problem? Remy needs you right now. He just told you and you left. Knowing our Cajun he's brooding and feeling damn guilty for what he’s done. Get moving, Slim!"

Scott actually managed a smile. "Kicking me in the ass, huh?"

"If necessary," Warren confirmed. "I'm sure you and Remy can work things out. Now get going!"

This time Scott nodded his head and hurried into the corridor. Warren was right. He and Remy would work things out and, being honest with himself, he already loved the idea of having a child with Remy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy? I'm back. Can I come inside or do you want me to leave again? He stood in the living room of the boathouse, hoping Remy would react to his thoughts. He had told Remy to stay here and to wait for his return, but he couldn't be sure Remy had obeyed. And honestly, he couldn't blame Remy for leaving. The way he had stormed out must have hurt his lover. Remy? Remy? Are you still here? You have every right to be mad at me, but come on, answer me!

Losing patience, he marched into the bedroom they used to share, but found it empty. He searched the boathouse methodically, but the Cajun was nowhere to be found. "Damn it, Remy, what did you do this time? I told you to wait for me."

Frustrated, he collapsed onto the couch. Scanning the room, he noticed the mug on the coffee table. He curled his fingers around the mug; the milk was still warm. Remy couldn't have left long ago if the mug was still warm. Staring at the warm milk, he placed the mug at his lips with the intention to sip. "What's that awful smell?" The milk didn't smell like it should and after taking a tiny sip, he quickly put it down again. Something was wrong with the milk!

This can't be a coincidence. Remy's gone and the milk smells and tastes funny. Argh, Remy, don't tell me you’ve gotten yourself into trouble again! Scott left the couch and picked up the phone, trying to remember which team members were at the mansion. "Hank? I need you at the boathouse, and bring Warren..."

"The boathouse? What are you doing there?"

"Remy and I had dinner here and now he's gone. I have the feeling someone drugged his milk and carried him off."

"Any signs of struggle?"

"None. Hank, hurry up."

"I'm on my way." Hank ended the conversation and left the lab.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cold. He was cold and in pain. A low moan escaped his throat and he tried to move, but found that he was almost completely immobilized. He could move his fingers, but that was about it. He was lying on something hard and cold and leather bonds were keeping him in place. His eyes opened slowly, fearful of the bright light they might encounter, but the lights were dimmed and they flew open. Where de hell am I?

It didn't take him long to identify his surroundings. He was in some sort of lab, but it wasn't Essex's. This one was slightly different. So if Essex hadn't strapped him to this exam table, who had? Dark Beast! The memories returned to him and he shivered. His attempt to fight the straps was useless. Let's charge dem! But when he tried to charge them, nothing happened. Mon Dieu, he collared me! The dreaded weight around his neck was back. Non, I can' give in. I have to fight, have to fight for my chile!

The door opened and Dark Beast entered the lab. Remy didn't have to remind himself that it wasn't Hank; Dark Beast's evil mind was a constant reminder. Huh? I can still sense his emotions, even collared? Dark Beast approached him and Remy trembled, only now noticing the IV he was hooked up to. Dark Beast picked up a syringe and injected a dark fluid into the IV port. The silence was getting on his nerves. Why wasn't the other mutant talking to him? "Non, what are you doin'? Don' you dare hurt my chile!"

Dark Beast laughed. "Don't worry, LeBeau. I want your child alive and well."

Remy's heart missed a beat. "You're after my chile? Why? Ai.... Ai!" A terrible pain rushed through his veins. "What’s dat?"

"I can't wait eight months for your child to be born, LeBeau. This concoction will quicken the fetus' development. What usually takes months will now only take one, maybe two weeks."

Remy screamed and tried to move his bound hands to his abdomen. The tiny presence in his mind whimpered and he wished he knew how to protect his child. Mon Dieu... De pain! Only one, mebbe two weeks? He can' be serious!

Dark Beast leaned in closer and bared his teeth when he smiled. "Nine days from now your child will be born and I'll hand it over to Apocalypse. I don't know why he wants it, but he's paying me a lot of money and I get to keep your dead body to conduct some research on. Oh, didn't I tell you? Unfortunately, you won't survive the birth. Apocalypse gave me strict orders to make sure you die."

Remy's breath came in gasps. Apocalypse is behind dis? Why? Why does he want my chile? Mon Dieu, de pain... It's bad... I never felt anyt'in' like it and de li'l one is hurtin' as well. It's not supposed to grow dis fast... I can feel it grow, become stronger... Ai, de pain... It's burnin' me up!

Satisfied, Dark Beast watched his prisoner squirm on the exam table. "You'd better get used to the pain, LeBeau. It's the only thing you'll feel until you die."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What do we do now? Why isn't the professor here when I need him?" Scott paced the living area of the boathouse, watching Hank analyze the milk. Warren was trying to talk him into sitting down, but he simply ignored his friend. He felt damned guilty for walking out on Remy. If he had stayed, none of this would have happened.

"You're right," Hank said, after evaluating the test results. "I found a strong sedative in the milk."

"Someone abducted Remy! Abducted my lover and my child!" Oops, Hank didn't know that one yet, but he would have found anyway. Scott nodded his head in confirmation. "Remy's pregnant."

Hank stayed calm. "I already suspected as much, but how?"

"I helped him."

The three X-Men quickly turned around. "Sinister!" Scott's rage exploded seeing his nemesis in the doorway. At that moment he didn't wonder how Sinister had gotten past the security system. He simply marched forward and landed a right hook on Sinister's ugly visage. "You're to blame for this!" Only then did he realize that Sinister hadn't lashed back at him. The scientist had taken the blow and was now calmly staring at him. "You should have told him no!"

Sinister focused on Scott. "You agreed to this."

"I didn't!" Scott yelled the words. "I never agreed to his! He just told me!" Was it just his imagination or did Sinister's eyes lose some of their usual venomous expression? "You took advantage of him! You want the child for your own experiments."

"No." Sinister shook his head. "This was my way of making things up to him. I would never hurt Remy. I couldn't hurt him, even if I wanted to. There's something that makes me want to protect him. He's my son, my second chance..." Thinking of Remy, he ignored the X-Men. Completely focused on his own worries, his appearance changed involuntarily. Now that he was worried about Remy, he reacted like the man he used to be.

Stunned, Hank watched the transformation from Sinister into Essex. He knew Sinister was a metamorph, but he had seldom seen the scientist use his powers.

Scott realized it was time to take action. "Hank, I want you to return to the mansion. I'll stay in contact and should I need backup you'll have to provide it. Try to locate the professor and Logan, just in case we need help."

"Are you sure? Maybe I should stay and..." Hank recognized the expression on Scott's face and obeyed. "Report in every four hours." Quickly, he left to carry out Scott's instructions.

Scott studied Essex, seeing worry and even fear in the scientist's eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"I sensed that Remy was in trouble." He was surprised that Scott and Warren accepted his presence. "Tell me what happened."

"Someone drugged his milk and then carried him off," Warren supplied. His first reaction had been to prepare for a fight, seeing Sinister in their midst, but Scott's calm reassured him and he decided to wait and see what happened next. He had never seen Nathaniel Essex; he only knew Sinister. Essex was dressed in Victorian clothes, had a black moustache and a trimmed beard and looked about forty. So this is who you used to be before Apocalypse got his hands on you? We have more in common than I ever thought. Apocalypse changed you into Mister Sinister and he transformed me into Death. Do you hate Apocalypse as well?

Essex gave Warren a thoughtful look. Had Warren sent him those thoughts on purpose or didn't the X-Man know he was broadcasting? Hate Apocalypse? Maybe. At the time I thought I was making the right decision and Apocalypse didn't force me to accept his proposal, not exactly. He just didn't tell me what price I was supposed to pay. If I had denied Apocalypse, Remy would never have been born...

"We need to find out who kidnapped Remy." Scott continued pacing. "Was it Creed?"

"No," Essex replied softly. "Creed's safely locked away."

"I hate not knowing what's going on!" Scott wanted to formulate a plan of action, but all he could do was wait.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The pain was always present and constantly shot through his veins. Eventually, it found the fetus and unleashed its effect. It was impossible to grow used to the pain and Remy lost track of time. Only the pain existed, the pain and the presence in his mind, which was frightened and miserable.

Dark Beast grinned after injecting more of his concoction into the IV port. Remy had been his prisoner for twenty-four hours now and he was already immensely pleased with the new data he was gathering. Ignoring his prisoner's pain filled screams, he tightened the straps, making sure the collared Cajun wouldn't escape accidentally. He was so focused on his project that he never noticed the arrival of his employer.

Apocalypse's eyes settled on LeBeau, who released a horrid wail as the pain got the better of him. Displeased, Apocalypse advanced on Dark Beast.

Dark Beast finally grew aware of Apocalypse and turned around with a leering grin on his face.

Apocalypse studied the Cajun, realizing what was going on. "You're going against my orders, Dark Beast."

"I didn't think you'd mind." Dark Beast met Apocalypse's eyes. "You want him dead, so what does it matter if he suffers some pain prior to that?"

Apocalypse walked over to the exam table. It took him several minutes to capture Remy's gaze with his. The empathy was still at work, but he managed to deflect it.

Remy blindly stared at the ceiling, but then something tugged at his mind. Giving in to the pull, he met Apocalypse's eyes. Mon Dieu, now my days are truly numbered... I'm so sorry, li'l one... He knew better than to expect mercy from Apocalypse and didn't plead with the powerful mutant.

"Untie him," Apocalypse commanded.

Dark Beast froze in his tracks. "What?"

"You heard me, untie him. There's an examination room next to your office where he'll be comfortable. I also want you to give him something against the pain."

Remy's eyes widened. Did Apocalypse really say dat? Why help me?

Apocalypse leaned in closer until his face hovered above Remy's. "Yes, you'll die after giving birth to your child, but that doesn't mean you have to suffer unnecessarily."

Remy licked his lips. "Why?" Would he finally get his answer? "Why do dis to me and my chile?"

"You're only a pawn in this game," Apocalypse revealed. "My minion, Mister Sinister, has found a way to undo the restrictions I placed upon him. I took away his feelings and his empathy to make sure he would serve me well. But you woke these feelings inside him again. He needs to know his place and you're going to help me."

"Dis is 'bout my fat'er?" The torturous pain made it hard for him to speak, but he persevered.

"Give him something against the pain," Apocalypse ordered again, undoing the last restraints.

Reluctantly, Dark Beast injected a painkiller into the IV port. "You're making a mistake."

But Apocalypse didn't react to Dark Beast's words. He helped Remy sit upright and watched as the Cajun's right hand settled over his stomach.

Remy gulped, feeling the slight 'bump'. Dark Beast's concoction was working; the fetus' growth had been accelerated. Eight days... if Dark Beast had spoken the truth he would give birth to his child in eight days! It was supposed to be eight months!

"Help him to his room and make sure he's comfortable. I don't have a quarrel with Gambit." Apocalypse watched Dark Beast and saw the mutant's reluctance to help the prisoner. After Dark Beast deposited Gambit on the bed, he grabbed the other mutant by the throat. "I said you could have him after he died. I want that baby for my Horsemen. This child will be the perfect Death and you're not harming Gambit before the child's born. Do you understand?"

Due to Apocalypse's hold, Dark Beast was unable to nod his head. "Under... stand..."

Apocalypse released Dark Beast and checked on the Cajun, who had curled up on the bed, his arms wrapped protectively around his waist. "Make sure he's comfortable. I'll visit again tomorrow to make sure you're following orders." Remy was the perfect tool to get back at Sinister.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Essex sat in a chair at the command center of the X-Men mansion. Scott kept a close eye on him and accompanied him wherever he went. The strain that Scott was suffering was clearly visible. Scott had been unable to sleep since this had started and going nonstop for forty-eight hours was affecting him. "You need to rest," Essex pointed out. "You won't be in any shape to help Remy if you exhaust yourself like this." His words made Warren and Scott look up. "What?"

"I didn't believe Remy when he said you had changed." Scott leaned back in his chair, but his fingers clawed the armrest. His former nemesis hadn't morphed back and Essex sat opposite him. "Remy mentioned you're an empath as well?"

"When I was still Nathaniel Essex I didn't know I was a mutant. I had no idea what empathy was, or telepathy. Looking at it in hindsight I know I built walls that were strong enough to even keep out my wife, Rebecca. The only one who managed to get past them was my firstborn, Adam, but he died when he was still a child."

"And Remy?" Warren crossed his arms, feeling curious.

"Remy changed everything." Essex met Warren's eyes. "I did some terrible things to Remy, and the Massacre was one of them. I doubt you'll ever understand, but Apocalypse took away my feelings and because of Remy they have slowly returned. I fought the return of my empathy at first, but then Remy drew in Scott's depression and your professor contacted me, asking for my help."

"I saw you morph from Jean-Luc back into Sinister when you left," Warren admitted.

Essex's head jerked up. "You what?"

"I promised to keep it a secret. Remy was already upset." Warren realized he had made the right decision. "So how does it feel now that your empathy's back?"

Essex briefly closed his eyes. "I'm trying to make things up to Remy for my mistakes in the past. Helping him to get pregnant was my way of making it up to him."

Scott shook his head. "I can't believe Remy talked you into it." Oh, he knew Remy had probably wound Essex around his little finger after learning his father was so eager to help him. This had been Remy's game plan all along.

"There's one thing that I don't understand," Essex said, while shifting his gaze from Warren to Scott. "Why didn't he tell you? He assured me you agreed to having a child."

Scott shrugged his shoulder. "I'm still trying to figure Remy out. The one thing I have learned is that he's unpredictable. He might trust me, but deep down in his heart he still fears rejection. He probably felt it was safest to wait until the baby was born before telling me. That way, the baby would already be born and I couldn't do anything else but accept it. Remy's mind works in mysterious ways." A part of him rejoiced at becoming a father, but the other part felt betrayed by his lover's lack of trust in him. Remy, I would have accepted the pregnancy, the child, but things would have been a lot easier if you had told me straight away!

Suddenly, the air shifted, and alarmed, the three men jumped to their feet. "What's that?" Scott had no idea what was manifesting in the control room. It wasn't the professor; he could identify Charles' mind signature easily. This was someone else.

Essex was the first to identify the intruder. "It's Apocalypse." Instinctively, he shifted back to his pervious form and Sinister stalked closer to the moving air. "I had my suspicions, but I wasn't sure."

Scott suddenly felt trapped between Apocalypse and Sinister. His old instincts warned him not to trust Sinister. Essex was a different matter, but Sinister...? Am I going insane or do I trust Essex... uh, Sinister... Essex?

Apocalypse grinned at Sinister. "I thought I'd find you here, traitor."

Sinister's eyes narrowed. "What do you want?"

"Your obedience. You're mine... your soul is mine. You have no right to reclaim it."

"Let Remy go." Sinister gathered his powers, ready to strike out at Apocalypse if necessary.

"No," Apocalypse whispered, amused. "He's mine as well, but... come to me, swear an oath of allegiance and I might let the baby live."

"Never... I'll never serve you again."

Scott cringed. Remy's life was at stake here!

"I'll get him back," Sinister vowed. "And I'll destroy you."

"Destroy me?" Apocalypse laughed, amused. "Feel free to try. You know where to find me and... don't forget, Remy's only got seven days left to live."

"Why?" Scott moved closer, stepping between Apocalypse and Essex. "What did you do to him? He was in perfect health the last time I saw him!"

Apocalypse merely grinned. "Let's just say he'll give birth to one of the most powerful mutants in seven days and he won't survive the birth."

"You bastard!" Scott tried to launch himself at Apocalypse, unable to stand the triumphant grin on the mutant's face any longer, but Warren moved quickly and caught him before he reached Apocalypse.

"Don't do this, Slim! He's doing this to piss you off, hoping you'll lose it. Don't give him that satisfaction." Warren tightened his hold on Scott, who was trying to fight him off. "Remy needs you sane and in one piece."

Warren's words finally penetrated Scott's mind. "I'm going to get Remy back, Remy and our child!"

Sinister nodded his head in approval. "We're coming for Remy. You'd better return him to us now because we won't stop until we have him back."

Apocalypse smirked and then disappeared. Everything was going as planned; they would walk into his trap and then they would be at his mercy. Essex, we're not finished yet.

Scott freed himself from Warren's hold and turned around. "Don't you ever do that again! I was going to blast his arrogant head off!"

"And how would that help Remy?" Warren inquired, calmly.

"Warren's right," Essex said, quickly transforming back. He no longer felt like Sinister and didn't want to look like that monster anymore, but sometimes the armor came in handy. "Apocalypse was playing with you. We need to keep our wits about us and hit him when and where he least expects it."

Scott collapsed onto a chair, feeling drained. "What do you suggest?" The bastard's got Remy and my child! I want them back, both of them!

"I can open a tesseract and it will take us to Apocalypse's base." Essex thought everything over. "But first we need a plan."

Scott bounced back; making plans was something he excelled at. Looking at Warren and Essex, he realized it was up to the three of them to rescue Remy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

True to his word, Apocalypse returned the next day. Remy was curled up on the exam bed, and only reluctantly raised his eyes when Apocalypse entered. In a weird way he felt thankful that Apocalypse had stopped the pain. Although Dark Beast still administered the concoction, he also gave him painkillers, which numbed his agony. The baby had grown since yesterday and it showed. His abdomen was no longer flat and the presence in his mind was still growing stronger. Thankfully, the child didn't seem to be in any pain. "Merci," he whispered eventually.

Apocalypse nodded his head once. "Is there anything you need... within limits of course."

"Pen and paper?" Remy wasn't sure Apocalypse would give him those things. The fact that he would never talk to Scott again made it necessary that he write everything down. Maybe Scott would find his letters and know he had never wanted to hurt his lover by doing this behind his back.

"Give him pen and paper," Apocalypse told Dark Beast, while advancing on his prisoner. "I can feel it. Your child is growing stronger. Do you have any idea how strong it will be? Stronger than Nate... Your DNA, combined with Scott Summers', will create one of the strongest mutants alive and your child will serve me."

"Non," Remy spat, defiantly. "Scott will make sure you never get your filt'y hands on our chile!"

Apocalypse smiled. "Gambit... I'll kill Summers after the baby has killed you. Don't you understand that this is one big trap? Scott and Essex will come for you and by destroying them I'll rid myself of their annoying presence. Your child will take its place as Death and lead my Horsemen to new victories."

Remy shivered violently. "I'd rat'er kill myself... and de chile..."

"Ah, but you can't. Dark Beast observes your every move and will prevent you from committing suicide. Don't be too eager to die. You'll be dead in six days anyway."

The presence in his mind stirred and Remy bit his lower lip. I'll find a way out, li'l one, trust me...

"Here, your pen and paper." Dark Beast dropped the items on the bed.

"Is the fetus developing according to plan?" Apocalypse's gaze shifted from Remy to Dark Beast. "The accelerated growth process won't harm it?"

Dark Beast shook his head. "No harm."

Pleased, Apocalypse turned away from Remy and left the exam room, gesturing Dark Beast to accompany him. Once he was sure that Remy couldn't hear him, he said, "Keep a close eye on him. He looks docile, but he's still willing to fight. If you have to kill him, make sure the child stays unharmed."

"I understand," Dark Beast mumbled, pleased.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scott, knowing I'll never see you again, makes this even harder. I'm writing this, uncertain if you'll ever read my words. Apocalypse granted me pen and paper and... and these will be my last words. Remy put down the pen, wondering how to start. Dark Beast had just given him another injection and even in spite of the painkillers, the backaches and headaches were killing him. His entire body hurt and his stomach convulsed frantically.

I regret being that secretively, but when you told me how much you wanted a family, I knew I had to act. What I said at the boathouse is true. I want you to be happy and... I was being selfish as well, but I didn't realize that at the time. Remy stared at the doorway, knowing Dark Beast was watching him closely.

You know what my childhood was like, cher. After fleeing the Antiquary I got a real home with Jean-Luc and being there taught me how important it is to have someone who loves you unconditionally. He never expected a personal revelation, but there it was. I wanted our child to have parents who loved unconditionally, who would be supportive and freely give the love my birth father never gave me. Essex told me he murdered by mother right after I was born and now history is going to repeat itself. Apocalypse will kill me to get to our child and... Mon Dieu, I don't want our child to suffer my fate.

But my hands are tied, cher. Our child is growing stronger every passing hour. I can feel it grow, feel the presence in my mind. How will the child react when I die? When the connection is torn apart? Cher, you have to save our child.

I don't know if and when you will ever read this letter. I just want you to know how much I love you. These last few weeks were the best of my life. You showed me the beauty of making love, of belonging. I'll try to write some more later, but right now I'm so tired. It's those drugs Dark Beast keeps feeding me. Please, cher, don't let Apocalypse ruin our child's life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frustrated, Scott stared at the abandoned control center. "He's gone. Apocalypse is gone and we're too late! We're never going to find him!"

Warren was depressed as well. Essex had been so certain that they would find Apocalypse and Remy here. "What do we do now?"

"Search another one of his bases. We'll search them all until we find them!" Essex refused to give up, but they were running out of time. They only had five days left!

"Slim, maybe..."

"Just leave me alone, Warren!" Scott slammed the door behind him and retreated into the corridor to blow off some steam. Banging his fist into the wall, he cursed his own stupidity. "Why did I leave that day? Why couldn't I stay with you and be glad about the baby? Why did I run away? Why? Oh, Remy, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I should have trusted your judgment, but no, I thought I knew it all. Remy, I want you back..."

Warren exchanged a glance with Essex. They had heard Scott's words and felt equally depressed. "Do you think we'll find Remy in time?" Warren walked up to Essex, studying the older man. Essex's shoulders slumped forward and the eyes were dull and lifeless. "Don't tell me you've given up on Remy!"

"No, I haven't." Essex forced himself to keep up hope. "As I said earlier, we'll search his bases until we find the one where he's hiding Remy."

"Can we do that in five days? How many bases are there?" Scott had joined them again.

"A few..." Essex sighed. Suddenly, things looked hopeless.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Four more days to go, cher. I wish you were here. Today, the child kicked me for the first time. I was waking up from a nap, -I nap all the time these days-, and the li'l one was kicking me. It felt... there are no words, cher. I wish you had felt it too.

I don't know if it's a boy or a girl. My telepathy tells me a lot, but the gender remains a secret. Does it matter to you if it's boy or a girl? I didn't even think about the names yet. I thought I had months before making a decision, but now those months have changed into days.

Apocalypse and Dark Beast are watching me. They're afraid I'm going to kill myself. I threatened to do that... but I can't do it. I can't kill our child. I still hope you'll find the li'l one in time. Please, cher, I'm afraid.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another day has passed. Three more until the birth of our child. Apocalypse keeps telling me that I won't survive the birth, that I'll never see our child and that hurts. Trying to distract myself, I've been thinking about names. If it's a girl, you could name her Jean. I think Jean would have liked that. And if it's a boy? Did I ever tell you about David and Benjamin? They were good friends, helped me through one of the roughest patches in life. I'd like Benny... if that's okay with you... not that I'll have a say in the matter.

Cher, maybe it's a good thing you can't see me now. You won't believe how much weight I've gained in just a few days. When I look down I can barely see my feet. It feels like the child is absorbing my energy and it probably is. Remy put down the pen and rubbed his abdomen beneath his shirt. At times, the child moved and he had never felt a closer connection to anyone before, even with Scott. I wanna see you grow up... wanna love you... wanna show you how bien life can be and instead I damned you to hell by lyin' to Scott.

Cher, I don't know how to say I'm sorry. I wanted to experience this with you. I wanted us to share the burden and pleasures of pregnancy. You could have given me back rubs... and I would love you to rub my feet right now, but it won't happen. Scott, I don't know where you are, but I know you're going insane by now... Please come after us and save the baby?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cher, what am I supposed to do? I've only got forty-eight hours left and...Ai, de baby kicked 'gain... Remy pushed a pillow behind his back and rode out the nagging pain. It won't be long and then Dark Beast will be back with another injection, the last one. They expect the child to be born in the next forty-eight hours. Unable to continue, Remy stared at the paper. Cher, I want you to be wit' me when it happens... not Dark Beast and Apocalypse. Dark Beast hinted he'd lemme bleed to deat'. But he couldn't tell Scott that. He had to be strong now.

Would you contact Jean-Luc and Mattie and tell them I died? Don't tell them how I died. Just say it was in battle and my body was vaporized, something like that. I don't want them to see my corpse and figure out the truth. Tell Bobby I like him a lot. And Warren... I would have liked to become friends; we were heading in that direction.

He released a strangled sigh as the baby shifted. The presence in his mind pushed deeper, nestling itself in his thoughts. Cher, I can feel our baby. The li'l one is making himself at home in my mind. I'm afraid you've got another telepath on your hands, don't know about the empathy. We're so deeply intertwined that it's hard to tell.

Cher, I don't know if I can write again. Dark Beast is prepping the operating theatre and it won't be long before he moves me out there. I... I've got to stop writing now....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Famous last words, cher? Sorry, but I think I'm slowly losing my mind. This is the last time I can write down my thoughts. My time's almost up. I only got four more hours to go. Cher? Je t'aime, don't ever forget that. I fought Apocalypse and Dark Beast, but I'm hardly a match for them in my condition. Je t'aime, cher. Try to save the li'l one and love our child? Cher... Dark Beast is entering my room and... Adieu, cher... je t'aime... Remy faced Dark Beast and tried to fight down his rising panic. This was it.

"Get to your feet, LeBeau."

"I ain' sure I can..." He struggled into a sitting position, but the weight pushed him back down. "Mon Dieu, I can' do dis." His belly was round and the child ready to be born, but he felt incredibly weak. The child had absorbed his energy, his strength, and he was wasting away. Dark Beast and Apocalypse won' have to kill me, givin' birt' will!

"This is the last base! Remy and Apocalypse have to be here!" Essex was panicking, but he didn't want Scott and Warren to know that he was losing it. During the last week, they had spent every minute together, sharing hope and despair.

"You're an empath. Can you feel Remy?" Warren was nervous as well and he didn't dare look at Scott, who had tightly locked away his emotions and was now acting as his old self, the hard ass team leader who refused to show any feelings. It was Scott's way of dealing with the situation, but Scott was shutting them out while they needed each other!

Hearing Warren's words, Scott looked expectedly at Essex. "Is Remy here?" He and Essex had buried the hatchet, working closely together in order to find Remy. Essex had convinced him that he was sincere and Scott had let go of most of his suspicions.

Essex focused inwardly and reached out with his empathy. Using this power felt odd as he hadn't used it for decades. He was about to give up, when he picked up his son's weak mind signature. "Yes! He's here," he exclaimed triumphantly. "We found Remy and he's still alive!"

Scott licked his lips, unable to show his excitement at hearing the good news. He wanted Remy and their child in his arms first. "What are we waiting for?"

"Remember the plan!" Warren stopped Scott. "Essex and I will distract Apocalypse while you go after Remy."

"Use the link," Essex advised. "As you get closer to Remy you'll feel him in your mind." Essex pointed Scott in the correct direction. "He's close... He's in an operating theatre and... and the child is about to be born. You have to hurry!"

Scott didn't bother to answer and disappeared in the corridor, leaving Warren and Essex behind.

Warren met Essex's eyes. "Apocalypse ruined my life... I want a piece of him."

Essex raised his hand. "I know what he did to you, but we're in no way as powerful as he is. We need to provide a distraction, nothing more. We can't destroy him and we would be fools to try. Distract him and then retreat..." Warren growled something unintelligible. "Believe me," Essex started, "I want him dead as well, but Apocalypse is nearly indestructible. Scott and Remy are depending on us. We distract Apocalypse and then return to the Blackbird."

Warren was about to point out to Essex that he didn't have to take any orders from him, but... Essex is right. This isn't the time for revenge... Remy needs us.

Warren took a step away from Essex. "Stay out of my mind."

"Communicating telepathically enhances our chances of a surprise attack." He started walking down the corridor that would lead them to Apocalypse. "But if you want to throw away that advantage, there's nothing I can do to stop you."

"I hate it when you're right." Were they bantering? Warren followed Essex and lowered his shields.

A wise decision, Essex complimented his companion, wondering how they were going to distract Apocalypse long enough without getting killed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Apocalypse watched their arrival closely. Summers was going after LeBeau and didn't require his immediate attention. Dark Beast could handle that situation. Remy LeBeau would be dead once Summers reached his lover and Dark Beast would bring him the baby. No, he needed to focus on the two traitors; Essex and Worthington. He had never thought it possible that Essex could escape his grasp. By taking his empathy away, the scientist had become emotionless, fed by his eagerness to continue his research, but now...? Essex had even taken on his old form, no longer wearing the armor he had given the scientist.

"My revenge will be sweet." He was looking forward to getting back at Essex. He wouldn't kill his former minion, no, he had something far worse in mind for Essex. And then there was Worthington. Transforming him into Death had been risky, but Worthington had lived up to his expectations. It was a damn pity that Rogue had managed to reclaim him for the X-Men. He wasn't sure yet what kind of punishment Worthington deserved... maybe he would rip the mutant's wings off? Yes, he liked that idea.

Moving soundlessly, he sneaked up on them. They don't even know I'm here... Worthless insects... Essex, you disappoint me.

Essex grabbed Warren's shoulder and forced the X-Man to a halt. Frozen in his tracks, he reached out telepathically. We're not longer alone.

Warren hated seeing Essex morph into Sinister and involuntarily took a step back. His subconscious still felt Sinister was the enemy. Now what?

We need to distract him and to stay alive. Use your flight to your advantage. My armor will protect me, but you'll have to be quick to avoid getting hit. Warren spread his wings and Essex felt awed. Had he really had a hand in destroying those wings? Apocalypse, the price was too high. You took away my humanity... Now that I've got it back I won't let you take it away from me again.

Warren flew close to the ceiling, trying to get a good view of the room they were in. Suddenly, his sharp eyes picked up Apocalypse's form. Essex, look out! He's coming up from behind you!

Essex quickly turned around to face Apocalypse. Seeing the look on the other mutant's face, he realized that they had been lured into a trap. The pure evil that Apocalypse radiated almost made him nauseous. "I want my son back." Raising his arms, the palms of his hands began to twitch, powering up for an energy blast.

Apocalypse laughed loudly. "Your son's dying as we speak. You crossed me... You defied me. I have to punish you, Essex."

Essex prepared to release the energy blast. He called me Essex; he knows the transformation is complete. The empathy's back and I can't go back to being Sinister, he knows it! That means he's going to kill me... and Remy! He had forgotten about Warren and was startled when the X-Man launched an attack.

"Puny insect!" Apocalypse caught Warren in mid flight and flung him against the metal wall. "I gave you power! I gave you immortality and you threw it away!"

Warren moaned, sliding down the wall. He hit the floor hard, realizing he had suffered at least one bruised or even broken rib but he wasn't giving up yet. He managed to get back to his feet, staggered, and leaned against the wall to support himself. Maybe it's not only one bruised rib... Fuck, it hurts! "You changed me into Death against my will! I never wanted to be a Horseman. I was in so much pain... my wings..." His emotions had gotten the better of him and that made him careless. He never saw the blast coming that Apocalypse aimed at him. He went down again and curled up, wrapping his arms around his ribcage. His eyes widened, seeing Apocalypse stalk toward him. Fuck, I'm in no shape to fight him...

"Stay away from him," Essex whispered in a low tone. The warning, the threat, was clearly audible.

Amused, Apocalypse's gaze shifted from Warren to Essex. "I'm going to rip his wings off... and you're next."

The sudden terror that emanated from Warren made Essex flinch. Damn his empathy! Now he remembered why he had always locked it away. He strengthened his shields, but it was too late. Memories of losing his wings consumed Warren. I've got to stop this... "It ends here, Apocalypse."

Apocalypse grinned. "Yes, it ends here... for you!" He raised his hands and a blue cloud fled his fingertips, heading in Essex's direction. "I gave you these powers... and I can take them away!"

The blue cloud surrounded him and Essex screamed in pain. He collapsed onto his knees and clutched his head between his hands. His body convulsed in pain as the armor was ripped from his skin. His brow and his eyes burned and he collapsed into himself. Feeling weak, he fought for breath, wondering why his skin was still crawling. He opened his eyes and forced himself to look at his hands. My God... The armor's gone... The energy that fed my blasts... gone... My knowledge... I'm forgetting things! A tormented scream left his lips. "No!"

Warren gathered his courage and his strength and pushed himself to his feet again. His courage was born out of despair, but he didn't hesitate and flung himself at Apocalypse, knowing he was going to pay a high price for his interference.

Enraged, Apocalypse had to divide his powers. Essex was still on his knees, growing weaker and younger... and Warren... "Those wings are mine!"

Warren's instincts kicked in. They had to retreat before Apocalypse would kill them both! Ignoring the burning pain in his chest, he changed direction and grabbed Essex's shoulders, taking him into the air with him. "Argh...!" His eyes almost bulged from their sockets, trying to carry the extra weight. He couldn't abandon Essex now!

Maneuvering skillfully, he managed to stay out of Apocalypse's firing range. He flew into a corridor and held onto Essex, who had lost consciousness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cher, I'm so sorry. I never wanted it to end like dis. Wanted you to be happy, wanted to spend de rest of my life wit' you! Remy kept his eyes tightly closed as Dark Beast hovered above him. Although he was in no shape to fight Dark Beast, the other mutant was strapping him to the exam table, leaving him vulnerable and helpless.

"You don't need this anymore." Dark Beast used a pair of scissors to cut Remy's shirt in two.

Remy's hands changed into fists, wanting to cover his abdomen with his hands, shielding his baby from Dark Beast's touch. The baby was now a constant presence in his mind, calling out for reassurance and he empathically caressed the frightened presence. Je t'aime, li'l one. Would have loved to find out if you're a boy or a girl, mais... Scott, where are you? We're runnin' out of time!

Peeking through his eyelids at his huge belly, he struggled against the bonds as Dark Beast injected a dark liquid into the IV port. I wanna live! I wanna see my chil', wanna hold my baby! Why? Why can' I hold my li'l one? The look Dark Beast cast at him, made him wary. Apparently, this was it.

Dark Beast shrugged his shoulders. "I don't care whether you're conscious or not, but Apocalypse wants you to fall asleep peacefully... You won't wake up again though."

Remy fought the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. Non, I don' wanna die! I'll fight it... fight it.... fight... Suddenly, the exam room around him faded as his mind fell into a dark, bottom-less pit.

Pleased, Dark Beast took hold of the scalpel and pushed it into the soft flesh. Remy would bleed to death.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Apocalypse strode into the operating theatre. Dark Beast was bowed over their prisoner and still warm blood dripped from the exam table. It was a pity that LeBeau had to die, but the Cajun would never willingly hand over his child. As he reached the exam table, he heard the cry of a newborn. A new, powerful mutant had been born and the child would serve him, only him!

Coldly, his eyes scanned LeBeau's abused form. Dark Beast had performed a caesarian section, without bothering to close the wound. LeBeau was bleeding profusely and his insides showed. He no longer paid the Cajun any attention. "Give me the baby."

Dark Beast had wrapped the baby in a towel and was about to hand the child to Apocalypse when an optic blast nearly took his head off. "Summers!"

Apocalypse quickly turned around and his eyes settled on the other mutant. "You're too late. Your lover is dead and Essex and Worthington are licking their wounds."

Scott could only stare at his lover's battered form. "No!" Remy couldn't die, couldn't leave him! He had to act quickly, or his lover would bleed to death! Acting on pure instinct, he blasted away at Apocalypse, who was forced to retreat momentarily. Running toward Dark Beast, he launched another attack and managed to knock the mutant over while quickly wrapping his arms around his child. My child, my baby... oh, Remy... A violent sob left his lips, realizing that Remy was no longer breathing. "No!"

Apocalypse signaled Dark Beast to move in on Summers, who was consumed by grief. Rage and sorrow made Summers extremely dangerous and he was going to leave it to Dark Beast to eliminate this threat.

"Oh no!" Essex stormed forward. Warren was behind him, and the winged mutant was still in a great deal of pain from the injuries he had suffered. Essex quickly analyzed the situation. Remy was clinically dead and if he wanted to bring his son back, they had to leave for his lab, now! "Scott, keep them at bay!"

Scott reacted at once and his optic blast tore the air apart. Essex grabbed Remy and lifted his son in his arms. Their only chance was to leave this place via a tesseract, but... Did he still possess the power to open one? Apocalypse had tried to rip his powers from him; had Apocalypse succeeded or had Warren interfered just in time? Please... my son's life depends on it!

Scott could hardly believed his eyes, seeing the tesseract take shape. Realizing Essex's game plan, he joined them. Essex entered the tesseract first, cradling Remy's body close his chest. "Warren, get moving!" Scott had seen Warren's slow responses and deduced correctly that his teammate was injured.

Warren knew he didn't have the time to argue and stumbled through the tesseract. Scott turned to face Apocalypse. "You killed Remy... And I'll find a way to kill you!" As he dived into the tesseract, he heard Apocalypse's malicious laughter. A moment later, he hit the floor hard, protecting the baby with his own body. Knowing that Essex was taking care of Remy, he looked at the baby in his arms. Entranced, he stared into the black on red eyes. A soft gurgle left the baby's lips and Scott smiled affectionately. "Oh my, you're a charmer..." The baby's eyes had completely captivated him and only now he heard Essex's voice, telling him to hurry up and help him.

After wrapping the thick towel closely around the baby, he walked toward Warren, who had collapsed on a chair. "Here, take good care of..." Him? Her? I don't even know if it's a boy or a girl...

"Summers, I need your help, now!" Essex had already hooked Remy up to life support and was now busy examining the extent of his son's injuries. "You need to assist me during surgery!"

Scott quickly joined Essex, leaving his child in Warren's care. Looking at Essex, he gasped. "What happened to you?" The moustache and beard were gone and Essex looked ten years younger.

"Apocalypse happened, but we don't have time for this. I want my son back." Preparing for surgery, he stared hard at Scott. "We're going to bring Remy back..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Despite the pain in his chest, Warren smiled at the baby. Getting used to the black on red eyes would take some time, but the baby was adorable. "Hey, we were really worried about you..." Realizing that Scott and Remy had never picked a name, he briefly lifted the towel. "Ah, a little boy...." The baby's big eyes locked with his and something tugged at his mind. After living with telepaths for years, he quickly identified the sensation. "And a telepath as well. Scott and Remy sure got their work cut out for them."

Ah, fuck, Remy... Ignoring his bruised ribs, he listened to Scott and Essex's concerned voices. Please, let Remy pull through.

Essex had closed Remy's wound as quickly as possible and replaced the precious blood his son had lost. Remy was still on life support, still not breathing independently. Scott's trembling hands found Remy's, and almost got tangled up in the IV lines. "Careful," he said softly, lifting the IV line so Scott could hold Remy's hand tightly.

Scott moistened his lips. His mouth had gone dry and he was scared to ask Essex how Remy was doing. His lover wasn't even breathing on his own! Looking at Remy's naked chest, he cringed. Essex had put in a large number of stitches in order to give him a chance at life.

"He's strong. Remy's a fighter," Essex said, reassuringly. He covered Remy's body with a sheet and tucked it loosely around his son's form. While helping Remy to get more comfortable, his hands encountered several pieces of paper in his son's pocket. "What's this?" Scott wasn't paying him any attention; the other man was too focused on his lover. He unfolded the sheets of paper and quickly realized Scott was the one who was supposed to read them, but he couldn't stop himself and devoured every word.

Finally, after long minutes, Scott realized that Essex wasn't talking anymore. Essex looked at least ten years younger and the changed appearance still threw him off, but then he noticed the paper. "What's that?"

"You should read this." Essex handed Scott the letters and checked his son's readings one more time. If everything went according to plan Remy should be able to breathe on his own when he took him off the ventilator. There was definitely brain activity and that fact reassured him that Remy would find a way back to them. "I'll leave you alone now. I still need to check on Warren and the baby."

"Oh, my God," Scott stuttered. "The baby!" He'd completely forgotten about the baby! Feeling terribly guilty, he almost jumped to his feet, but Essex's hand settled onto his shoulder and kept him in place. "Stay with Remy. I'll bring the baby to you... Maybe having the child close will urge Remy to come back to us."

Scott nodded his head, but he didn't feel any less guilty. "Remy's going to be okay? Really?"

"Yes," Essex promised. "Read the letters..."

Still suffering from emotional shock, Scott started reading, while caressing his lover's fingers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warren was on the brink of losing consciousness when Essex finally joined him. The winged X-Man was tightly holding the baby and the child had closed his eyes, dozing peacefully. Essex leaned in closer and tried to pry the baby from Warren's arms, but the younger man's eyes flashed open, ready to defend his helpless charge. "It's ok, I need to examine the baby."

Warren almost protested, but his lungs contracted and refused to draw in any oxygen. Essex quickly realized what was going on and took charge. After lifting the baby and putting him in his arms, he steered a stumbling Warren to another exam room in his lab. "Don't lie down. That will make breathing even harder on your lungs." He had placed the baby, who was soundly asleep, in a large chair and made sure it was cradled by soft sheets. As he concentrated on Warren, he realized that he first had to establish the extent of the damage, which Apocalypse had done, but first... "Can you hold on a little longer? I want to take the baby to Scott."

"Sure, I understand that Scott wants to see his son." Warren's eyes closed again; the pain was excruciating.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Essex cradled the baby boy against his chest and remained standing in the doorway, looking at Scott and Remy. Scott had a tight hold on Remy's right hand. He had brought Remy's hand to his chest and was now kissing the knuckles. I never believed Summers could love anyone except Jean Grey. Maybe I was wrong... I can feel his love for my son... Damn empathy.

Scott didn't seem to notice his arrival so he cleared his throat, trying to draw the other man's attention. Finally, Scott looked up. "This is your son." Gently, he placed the baby in Scott's arms.

"My son? I've got a son?" Scott stared at the baby, recalling the black on red eyes. "Oh, Remy... I don't want to lose you. Our son needs you... We'll call him Benjamin, Benny, just as you wanted. He needs you, Remy." Tears flowed from beneath the visor and he left his chair, stretching out next to Remy, carefully staying clear of his lover's injuries. "Remy, Benny needs you... I need you, please... Don't let Apocalypse win." He placed the baby in Remy's arms, hoping their son's presence would help Remy to find the way back to them. "Remy, you have no idea how much I love you... Please..."

Essex lifted his right hand and was stunned to discover the wetness on his face. I can't be crying... I haven't cried in decades... Then, suddenly, Warren's agony brushed the edges of his mind and he wiped away his tears. He had done all he could for his son. Now Scott's love had to pull Remy back. Turning around, he headed for Warren.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warren had wrapped his arms around his waist, trying to alleviate some of the pressure on his ribs. Although his injuries weren't that severe, it was the emotional pain that consumed him. Apocalypse had transformed him into Death against his will, had given him metal wings and blue skin, things which he had never wanted. Now his feathers were back, but the blue skin was a constant reminder of his past. Facing Apocalypse had brought back a lot of suppressed memories, which had refused to surface before. He vividly recalled the pain, which he had suffered when the metal wings had sprung from his shoulder blades.

"First, we'll establish whether your ribs are broken or only bruised." Essex continued to talk while scanning his new patient. "I'll need to bandage them and you might want to stay off your feet for a few days. I can also give you something against the pain." A lifetime ago he had been a physician, whose goal in life had been easing his patients' agony... but then Adam had died and Apocalypse had appeared. A part of him, the empathic part, still remembered how to reassure his patient. "You saved my life."

Warren wanted to shrug it off, but didn't move, knowing the pain would increase if he did. "I couldn't let Apocalypse have you." I know what the bastard's capable of...

Essex studied an x-ray of Warren's chest. "No broken ribs," he said, pleased. "But your bruised ribs require support nonetheless. I'll bandage them."

Warren's eyes followed Essex as the other man gathered some bandages. "I don't understand you."

"I'd be surprised if you did," Essex admitted, while helping Warren into a sitting position. "Sit still." Skillfully, he bandaged the bruised ribs. "You're lucky he didn't do more damage."

"He was with playing us," Warren whispered. He bit his bottom lip to prevent a pain filled moan from leaving his lips. This is Sinister. No matter what he looks like you can't trust him! He used Remy to gather the Marauders, who... who injured my wings...

Essex picked up on the sudden shift in Warren's feelings. The other man suddenly radiated unease. "You don't trust me... I don't blame you. I wouldn't trust me if I were you either." He had finished applying the bandages and lowered Warren back into the pillows that supported him.

Tired, Warren answered Essex's gaze. "It's... hard to explain. I know you’ve changed, otherwise you wouldn't have helped Remy, but... you're still Sinister."

No, Sinister is gone. But he realized that Warren didn't see it that way. But he could try to make the other man understand. He pulled up a chair toward the exam bed and sat down, calmly returning Warren's glance. "Mister Sinister was Apocalypse's... creation. Yes, I know I'm to blame for his creation, but... Pain and guilt consumed me. I had just lost by firstborn and Adam... I loved him. I lost my mind and agreed to the pact... My wife tried to stop me, but I never listened to Rebecca. Now, I wish I had listened to her..."

Curiously, Warren listened. He had never known the person behind Sinister. Essex had feelings, had loved his son, and regretted making those horrible mistakes. "You loved your son."

Saddened, Essex nodded his head. "After losing Adam, nothing mattered, but then something unexpected happened... Remy brought back my feelings. And now my empathy's back..."

"Empathy?" Warren blinked. Of course, that's why he was able to connect to Remy when he was suffering from Scott's depression and later when Creed's instincts controlled him... "Are you also a telepath?"

Essex shook his head. "I used to be one... Mister Sinister was. I don't know what powers Apocalypse took back. My armor is gone... and so is my ability to launch blasts. But the one thing I can't understand is why he changed my age..."

Warren considered the question. "Magneto was once reduced to a child. Maybe that was Apocalypse's game plan as well, but I stopped him before he could carry out his plan. Me flying you out of there wasn't something Apocalypse expected."

"That's possible... But I'm not going back to find out. I'll just have to adapt to these new conditions..." He smiled. He felt strong, young and energetic. Maybe it was time to make a new start? To try again? Hesitantly, he raised his eyes and smiled. "I don't think I ever properly introduced myself. I'm Nathaniel...No, Nathan." That name suited him best. He didn't feel like Nathaniel anymore. That man had died when Adam had stopped breathing.

Warren searched the other man's eyes. I don't know what to make of you. Only a few months ago you were our enemy and now you're trying to be a friend. I don't know Nathaniel Essex... I only knew Mister Sinister... and I have no idea who you are now... Nathan... The X-Men had taken him in after Rogue had helped him regain his memories. They had never judged him for this dark period in his life. I don't have the right to judge you either... The X-Men gave me another chance... I guess you deserve one as well.

Nathan sensed the acceptance in Warren's mind and watched the other man's eyes close. The bruised ribs were causing Warren pain and he got to his feet and retrieved a painkiller. "This will help you deal with the pain."

Warren started to shake his head, but then stopped. "Okay." Making the decision to trust Nathan, he closed his eyes and felt the needle slip beneath his skin. Had he made a mistake in trusting the other man? He hoped not. A few seconds later, a warm sensation rushed through his veins, taking away most of the pain. "I'm tired."

"That's normal. The painkiller is also a mild sedative. You should give in to sleep."

Picking up on Warren's thoughts, he flinched. It looked like he still had some telepathic qualities. "Don't worry. I'll look after them."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emotionally wrung out, Scott caressed Remy's face. The baby was situated between them and his big eyes were focused on Remy. "Come on, Remy, he needs you."

"He'll come back when he's ready," Nathan said, entering the room. "Have faith in him. Right now Remy's still too weak; he's gathering his strength."

"Can't we take him off the ventilator, or do you think he can't breathe on his own yet?" Scott cradled Benny against his chest. "I can't imagine raising Benny without Remy. Just look at his eyes!"

Nathan glanced at the baby and understood. "Like father like son." He proceeded to free Remy from the ventilator and both men endured a few tense moments when Remy had to breathe on his own.

"Breathe damn it!" Scott wanted to shake Remy back to consciousness, but controlled his fears. Remy's chest moved, his lips quavered and he drew in a shaky breath. "Yes!" Scott watched his lover closely and after a few minutes was reassured that Remy was going to be all right. "Now what?" Questioningly, he looked at Essex. "Shouldn't we take him back to Westchester? Hank can monitor him closely."

"He's not fit for transport yet. He's not stable yet. Maybe in a few days." He walked over to the doorway, realizing Scott needed some privacy. "I'll know if he grows worse... I'll stay close." The link was still there, connecting him to his son. He left the room, hoping Remy would wake up shortly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He drifted in darkness. Every now and then a memory surprised him and he found himself staring in to the Antiquary's eyes... Then the old man's face changed into Sinister's, became Apocalypse and even Rogue floated in the dark mud of memories. Desperately, he tried to find something to hold on to. He couldn't find the way out of this labyrinth; he needed guidance! Unexpectedly, a soft voice called out to him.

"Come on, Remy, he needs you."

That voice was awfully familiar; if only he could identify it! The voice continued to pull him closer, further away from the darkness. Scott! It's Scott! How could I forget 'bout Scott? Mon Dieu... he's here, he came for me! Ai, what 'bout de baby? Li'l one, are you bien? The presence was still close, but felt incredibly weak. Li'l one, don' give up...

"Remy, I love you. Please open your eyes and look at me?" Scott had been talking nonstop for the last hour and he had the impression that Remy's breathing had quickened. His lover's mind felt like a whirlwind, but was slowing down. Was he finally getting through to Remy? "Come on, open your eyes for me."

Unable to deny his lover, Remy's eyes slowly opened. Unfocused, he stared at the blurry form in front of him. His vocal chords refused to work and he used telepathy instead. Scott? Cher? Is dat really you? Are you really here?

Scott released a trembling sigh. "Fuck, Remy, you scared the hell out of me!" In disbelief, he stared at the weak smile on his lover's face.

Sorry, cher... Didn' do it on purpose... What happened? His eyes finally focused and his breath caught, realizing Scott was this close.

"We got you back..." He moistened his lips and lifted Benny, making sure Remy saw their son. "Remy, this is Benny... Our son."

Benny? Enthralled, Remy stared at the baby, who was making pleased noises. Tiny hands reached for him and involuntarily he counted the little fingers. Dere are ten of dem.

"Yeah, all ten of them." Scott carefully placed Benny in Remy's arms, staying clear of his lover's injuries. "I love his eyes..."

Remy swallowed hard. Black on red... Didn' know dat would happen. Benny's tiny fingers had wrapped themselves around his ring finger and the baby made a giggling sound, obviously pleased with all the attention he was getting. Remy suddenly averted his eyes. Sorry, cher... Didn' wanna go behind your back. You okay wit' dis, or...? Dark Beast had kidnapped him before Scott had been able to give him an answer.

"I love Benny, Remy. And I love you. You gave me the greatest gift you could ever give me." Leaning in closer, he placed a chaste kiss on his lover's brow. "I'm sorry we couldn't enjoy your pregnancy... Dark Beast took that away from us, but we've got a wonderful son now..."

Tiredly, Remy smiled, finally attempting speech. "How did you get me 'way from dem?"

"Your father helped."

"Jean-Luc's here?" Remy looked about, searching for the Cajun.

"No, Essex helped."

"Essex?" Confused, Remy locked eyes with Scott. "Essex helped?"

"And so did Warren. They distracted Apocalypse while I got you out."

"And Warren?" Maybe he should deal with this later. He was too tired to wonder why Warren would help. "Stay close, cher?"

"For the rest of my life," Scott vowed.

Benny cooed, smiled, and grabbed Remy's finger tighter. "Mon Dieu, petit..." Remy kissed his son's soft hands, and suddenly realized how lucky he was to have his son in his arms. Scott's lips brushed his forehead and he smiled contently. He had finally found his family...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twenty-four hours later both patients were feeling better. Nathan was checking on Warren and nodded his head approvingly. "Rest for another few days and your ribs should heal quickly."

Warren caught Nathan's glance. "What are you going to do once Remy's fit to return to the mansion? Stay here on your own, or...?"

"Or what?" Nathan leaned back against the wall. "I don't have much of a choice. Where else could I go?"

"You could come to the mansion with us. I'm sure Remy would be thrilled to spend more time with you... now that you're no longer Sinister."

"I don't know about that." Nathan shrugged his shoulders. "I doubt I'd feel welcome there."

"You could always give it a shot. You won't know until you’ve tried."

Nathan still wasn't sure. He would love to be close to Remy and Benny, but... "It's a bad idea." Considering this topic closed, he asked, "How's the pain?"

"I can deal with it. I felt worse when I realized what Apocalypse had done to me; turning me into Death."

Yes, we both have a reason to hate Apocalypse, but I made the pact willingly... "I need to check on Remy," Nathan announced, uncertain why he felt connected to Warren.

"Sure." Puzzled, Warren watched the other man leave. Something had happened just now, something that completely eluded him... What?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Merde, cher..." His abdomen hurt. He had winced seeing the stitches, figuring they would leave a ugly scar behind. Mais I gladly pay de price for havin' Benny. He still couldn't believe that Scott, Warren and Essex had defied Apocalypse in order to get him back. He still had to thank Warren for coming after him, but he was confined to bed and Scott made sure he stayed off his feet. Benny was amazing. The baby's black on red eyes could captivate him for hours and he caught himself counting his toes and fingers repeatedly. Had he ever been happier in his life? Scott never left his side. At first, he had been worried that Scott was still mad at him for going behind his back, but his lover absolutely adored Benny and he couldn't find a single trace of anger in Scott's mind. Everything was working out!

"Hey, Remy, wouldn't you prefer staying at Hank's lab instead of here?" Scott caught the tremors that suddenly shook Remy's hand. "What is it?"

Suddenly, Scott understood. Seeing Hank would constantly remind Remy of being at Dark Beast's mercy. Maybe they should stay here a little longer, at least until Remy felt stronger. "Sure, Remy, we'll stay." Remy's relieved sigh only confirmed his suspicions. "Benny's cute..." He hoped Remy would forget his fears and concentrate on their child instead.

"I do wonder 'bout de eyes, cher." Remy cocked his head and looked at Benny, who was resting beside him. He longed to hold him, but his injuries didn't allow that yet. His fingers caressed the baby's soft skin. "Can' believe he's our son, cher. I expected to be pregnant wit' him for several mont's... I can' believe he's here already."

"He's healthy," Scott said reassuringly. "Nathan examined him."

"Nat'an..." Remy grew quiet. It was amazing how easily Scott and Warren had accepted his father's presence. He had gulped himself, finding Apocalypse had made his father younger. And now he didn't have to worry anymore about Essex morphing into Sinister. His father no longer possessed Sinister's powers. He should definitely discuss all recent events in depth with his father, but Scott never left his side. "Cher?"

"What?" Scott had been lost in thought, staring into his son's eyes.

"I was t'inkin', and it's okay for you to say non... What if we asked Nat'an to come to de mansion wit' us?" He held his breath, uncertain how Scott would react.

Scott locked eyes with his lover. "Even Warren suggested that."

Remy raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

"Yeah... I'm not sure how I think about this, but it's worth a shot... and he is your father."

"What 'bout de ot'ers? Would de professor be okay wit' dis?"

"I think so, Remy. Charles believes in second chances. He wouldn't turn anyone away."

"Cher..." Remy suddenly remembered something. "Creed's in one of de tanks... Mebbe Charles will give him anot'er chance as well?"

"What? Creed's here?"

"Don' worry, cher. He's confined to his tank... Please, cher? I can feel him, feel his solitude... Mebbe Charles finds a way to help him?"

"I can't believe you're pleading on his behalf after what that bastard did to you." But Remy wouldn't be Remy if he didn't consider other people's needs as well as his own. "I'll talk to Nathan about it."

"About what?" Nathan entered the room and his eyes immediately traveled to the baby's. Briefly, he recalled holding Adam in his arms after his son had been born. He had never felt so much love for another being, not even Rebecca.

Remy shifted in the bed and repressed a moan. "You comin' to de mansion wit' us. What’s keepin’ you here?"

Nathan allowed a grin to break through. "I just had this conversation with Warren."

"You're my fat'er, de baby's grandfat'er... You're supposed to be close," Remy reasoned.

"What about the other X-Men?" Nathan walked toward the bed and offered Benny a finger. The baby grabbed it and pulled at it.

Remy smiled. "Benny likes you... And I don' care 'bout de ot'ers... We could stay at de boathouse... We would have some privacy dere."

Scott nodded his head. He didn't intend on sharing his happiness with the others twenty-four seven. He wanted some privacy. "The boathouse sounds great."

Enthusiastically, Remy tried to sit upright, but he had to abandon the effort. The pain was too much. He had refused painkillers, not wanting the meds to cloud his thoughts. "Even Scott agrees!"

"I'll think it over," Nathan promised. "But I came here to check on you. How are you doing today, Remy?"

"Except for de pain?" Remy smiled. "Jus' bien..." Benny cooed, trying to pull Nathan's finger closer. "I always t'ought babies cried nonstop, mais Benny..."

Scott agreed. Benny hadn't cried at all. "Maybe it's because he knows we love him, being a telepath... Do you think he's also an empath?"

"Don' know, cher... mais anyt'ing's possible." Remy let Nathan conduct his tests. His father even took a blood sample. "So, will I live?"

"Yes." Nathan returned the smile. "But you should rest now."

"One more thing..." Scott got to his feet and approached Nathan. "Can we talk in private?"

Surprised, Nathan nodded his head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It would mean a lot to Remy to have you close and you're welcome to stay at the boathouse," Scott assured the other man.

"I understand that. I even sense his desire to make me stay, but... there's so much going on in my life right now. I'm feeling things I didn't feel for ages..."

"Let Remy help." Scott searched for the right words. "He helped me see the truth. I denied I loved him because I felt dating Remy was wrong, that I should remain faithful to Jean."

"This is different. I haven't been human for so long..." Nathan looked around. The lab didn't hold his interest anymore.

"You can always leave Westchester..." Scott wondered how to bring up Creed. Remy's request to help the bastard had surprised even him. "And maybe Charles will find a way to help Creed as well."

Nathan chuckled. "Remy told you..."

"You have changed... Maybe Creed can change as well."

Nathan sighed. "We'll see what happens when Remy's strong enough to return to Westchester. I need that time to think about this."

"Sure," Scott said, eager to return to his lover's side. "I'll be with Remy in case you need to talk to me."

Nathan watched him leave, wondering what to do next.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy quavered as Scott finally placed Benny in his arms. During these last three days his injuries had begun to heal and the pain had grown slightly less. "Salut, petit..." Benny cooed, raised his arms and tried to reach for his face. Remy smiled and cradled his son against his chest. A wave of intense emotions suddenly swept through him; joy, contentment and curiosity. "Cher? Benny might be an empath too."

"That's just great," Scott said, jokingly. "Now I have two empaths on my hands." Sitting on the side of Remy's bed, he watched them closely. He didn't know if it was the eyes, or the way Remy and Benny interacted, but they seemed whole, together like this. He knew with certainty that he had been granted something special, a very special love. He remained silent, giving Remy the time to enjoy holding their son for the very first time. Later today they would return to Westchester, using one of Nathan's tesseracts. He had already contacted Hank to update him. Hank also knew about Dark Beast and had promised to act cautiously around Remy. I wonder how I'm going to explain Benny to the others? Yeah, Hank knows about the pregnancy, but the others don't.

"Cher?"

"Just thinking..." Scott said, reassuringly. "Bobby's at the boathouse right now, stocking the shelves and making sure we'll be comfortable there."

"Do dey know 'bout... Benny?"

"Only Hank knows..." Scott shifted on the bed, leaned in closer and tugged a stray look behind Remy's ear. "Are you sure you're up to going home?"

Remy nodded his head. "Is Nat'an comin' wit' us?"

"I haven't brought it up yet. He said he needed to think everything over."

"Cher, what do you t'ink he'll do?" During these last few days Nathan had turned out to be a caring father and grandfather and he didn't want to give this up yet.

"I think he'll accept." At least, Scott hoped so.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bored, Warren decided to leave his room in search of Nathan. He had grown used to the nagging pain in his chest and the bandages supported the bruised ribs, allowing him to move about on his own. Most of the time he followed Nathan's advice though, staying off his feet and resting. But being alone was getting to him and he needed some company. He had spoken to Remy and Scott and they had assured him that they were fine. Benny had smiled at him, and he had realized he already had a soft spot for the little guy.

Walking the corridors, he wondered where he was headed. A light at the end of the corridor guided him. The door was open and he stepped inside. Apparently, these were Nathan's quarters and he found the other man asleep in a chair. "That can't be comfortable." Looking about, he found that the room lacked a bed. "Sinister probably didn't need any sleep." But Nathan did. "Hey, wake up. Your back and neck's gonna kill you if you keep this up."

Nathan's eyes flashed open as he startled awake. "What?" Confused, he looked about.

"You fell asleep." Warren felt nervous, standing there. What the hell was going on with him? "Don't you have a bed?"

Nathan blinked. "A bed? I fell asleep? I haven't slept for..."

"Ages..." Warren finished, amused. "You're human again, remember? A bed is a necessity."

Nathan stretched carefully. His neck protested painfully and his back felt stiff. "I forget about that..." Slowly, he got to his feet. "I'm still getting used to this. When I was Sinister I didn't need to sleep, or eat."

Warren slowly lowered himself into the chair Nathan had just vacated. He still felt wobbly on his feet. "Are you coming with us or are you gonna stay here?"

The question surprised him. "You seem eager for me to accept the invitation... why? I was Sinister once."

Warren flinched involuntarily. "I got a second chance... You deserve one as well. You told me you accepted Apocalypse's offer because you were hurting after Adam's death... He played you, you know that, don't you?"

"I appreciate what you're trying to do, but I knew what I was getting myself into." That was only half-true, but he refused to see himself as a victim. "But I'll stay with Remy for a few more days. Then I'll probably leave Westchester."

Warren nodded his head. "I'm glad you decided to stay with Remy a little longer." And why did he feel glad that Nathan had accepted the offer? Why do I want him to stay? Looking at Nathan, he saw a dark-haired man with intelligent eyes, who was about his own age. It was hard to keep in mind that this man had once been Sinister... Things had changed... He was changing...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Things had changed... He was changing... He had been Nathaniel Essex first, then Mister Sinister and now he didn't really know who he was. But Warren seemed supportive, and whenever the winged X-Man was close, his empathy registered something, some emotion he couldn't identify. Did Warren know he was broadcasting? Had he ever felt this particular emotion before? He had to be careful not to broadcast his own emotions in return. Yawning, he studied the other man. Warren's right arm was wrapped around his chest, supporting his bruised ribs. What was that emotion?

"Is something wrong?" Warren felt uneasy, being studied like that.

"I don't know... I'm still getting used to being an empath."

Warren swallowed hard, realizing he should shield his emotions as well as his thoughts, but it was a little late to remember that. His eyes were glued to Nathan's and suddenly he felt the urge to run away and never talk to Nathan again. The burning sensation in the pit of his stomach intensified and it traveled straight to his groin. His eyes almost popped out of their sockets, realizing he was growing hard. "I've got to go now!" He almost jumped to his feet, repressed the pain in his chest and headed for the doorway.

Nathan watched him flee the room. His brow grew knitted as Warren's feelings touched his mind. Outwardly, he didn't react to the sudden revelation, but inwardly, he felt confused. He's attracted to me? To me? How can that be? He had always been attracted to men and had only married Rebecca because he wanted children. Oh, he had loved Rebecca in his own way, but she couldn't give him the things he wanted in life. And now Warren felt attracted to him? I should reconsider my decision. Accompanying them to Westchester is a bad idea... But Warren... Did he return Warren's feelings? He always felt something when he was close to the other man, but what was that something?

I don't need this complicating my life right now... He returned to the chair, collapsed on it and massaged his temples. When had his life become a mess?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scott shifted in the chair, instinctively tightening his hold on the baby. Baby? What's Benny doing in my arms? His eyes flashed open. When he had settled down in the chair, Remy and Benny had been asleep in the bed. Looking about, he realized Remy had left the room. Damn it, Remy! You're still confined to bed! Where did you go this time?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

His hand was steady as he pushed the button that would reveal Creed to him. The metal doors slid aside and Creed immediately looked at him. Shivers ran down his spine, seeing the expression in the other man's eyes. He almost reconsidered, but he was determined to do the right thing. Opening his shields, he cautiously probed Creed's thoughts.

Remy licked his lips. You called me here...

I didn't, Creed insisted. But now that you're here... Why did you help me? Why did you ask Sinister to stop the electric shocks?

Creed's eyes narrowed. I might have underestimated you... You ain't just a telepath... You're empath too?

Remy nodded his head. As long as the tank kept Creed at bay, he felt safe talking to the other mutant.

So why are you back now? Floating in the cold water, his eyes remained locked with his visitor's.

To let you know dat I wanna honor your agreement wit' de professor. He promised to work wit' you on controllin' your instincts. De X-Men keep deir promises. We'll try to help you. Remy wanted to return to his room to take his son in his arms again, but he had to do this first. What did you hope to archive by kidnappin' me? I don' know how to work my telepat'y... Why not take de professor or Betsy? Why me?

We got a history together, Creed explained. He had never thought of kidnapping someone else. Why are you doin' this for me?

"Remy, you shouldn't be here." Nathan had felt Remy's emotional turmoil and followed their link, which had brought him here. "You should be resting." He pushed the button again and the metal doors slipped in place, burying Creed in darkness again.

"You'll let us try to help him, won' you? I'm sure de professor can help him."

"Your professor can try," Nathan promised. "But I'm taking you back to your room now. Scott will be worried when he finds you gone."

Remy allowed his father to support him as they made their way back to his room. "I feel like I'm livin' in a dream," he admitted. "You always were my nemesis and now... now you're my fat'er..."

Nathan nodded his head. "I know the feeling."

"Remy! Where the hell did you go?" Relieved at having found his lover, Scott hurried toward Remy. Benny was crying softly, but the sobbing stopped once Remy was close again.

Remy smiled affectionately and allowed Benny to grab his fingers. "Sorry, petit." Looking up at Scott he felt his lover's concern. "I had to talk to Creed."

"Creed?" Scott sighed, exasperated. "Why didn't you tell me? I don't want you to be alone with that maniac."

"I was there with him," Nathan said, telling a little white lie. Remy had been alone with Creed for some minutes before he had joined them. "Remy's fine."

Scott decided to let it go, for now. "Come on, lie down." He guided Remy back to his bed and watched Nathan help his lover lie down. "When are we leaving?"

"You'll leave within the hour," Nathan replied, checking his son's wound. He hoped that Remy hadn't pulled any stitches. Fortunately, everything was fine.

"Nat'an...?" Remy sensed his father's discomfort. "Don' tell me you changed your mind!" He calmed down when Scott placed Benny in his arms.

"I can't come with you, Remy. My place is here, not with the X-Men. I wouldn't fit in." He shouldn't be close to Warren right now. He hadn't felt any lust or arousal for decades and being close to Warren was dangerous. Warren was a handsome man and the type he would have fallen for a lifetime ago. Remy's disappointment seeped through his shields. "I'll accompany you to Westchester, but after I made sure that you're well cared for I'll leave."

"Can' I change your mind?" Remy felt depressed. He had been sure Nathan would stay with them!

"No, Remy. I'd love to stay with you and Benny, but... this isn't the right time." Nathan gently squeezed his son's shoulder. "I've to prepare for your departure. I'll be back in fifty minutes... Try to rest until then."

Remy watched his father leave and then turned to Scott. "I really believed he'd stay wit' me..." His old fear was coming back. At some point everyone left him...

"I won't leave you, ever," Scott vowed passionately, realizing he would need a lifetime to prove his words to Remy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why don't I go first?" Scott hated leaving Remy and their baby alone, even for a few minutes, but he wanted to reassure Hank and anyone else present in the lab that nothing was wrong.

"Sure, great leader," Warren teased. His ribs still troubled him, but he already felt a lot better. He stayed close to Remy and away from Nathan, who every now and then seemed to study him. The baby was sound asleep, nestled in Remy's arms. But the Cajun still needed some sort of support and Nathan had folded an arm around his son's waist. "Let them know we're coming."

Scott nodded his head and disappeared into the tesseract. After taking two steps, he found himself in Hank's lab. Bobby, Logan and Hank were already waiting for him.

"Slim! It's good to see you! What the hell happened?" Bobby hurried toward his friend and gave him a quick hug. "Where's Remy?"

"He'll arrive shortly," Scott whispered, realizing he had to prepare them. "But he won't be alone."

"Yeah, I know. Warren will be with him."

"No, Bobby... Well, actually yes, but..." Scott felt at a loss. "Warren's got bruised ribs, so you've got another patient on your hands, Hank."

"I can deal with it." Hank nodded his head.

"And... we're bringing a friend. His name's Nathan. He helped us fight Apocalypse." Scott looked at Hank, who knew Nathan's real identity and he decided not to enlighten Logan and Bobby just yet. "And then there's Benny."

"Benny?" Bobby wondered about the brilliant smile on Scott's face. "Benny?"

"Benny is... our son. Remy and I... We have a son."

"A son?" Logan cocked his head. "What ain't you tellin' us?"

"Dark Beast conducted some experiments on Remy and the baby... Benny was born a few days ago. Remy was only pregnant for a short time." Scott cringed. They had agreed to this version of his pregnancy, not yet bringing up Essex's role in this.

Bobby's eyes sparkled. "Benny? Your son? That's... cool!" Excited, he shuffled his feet. "So where are they?"

The tesseract spit out Warren, who quickly walked toward them. "My, this is a weird form of traveling." His ribs hurt and he sunk down on a chair. "Hi, Hank... Bobby, Logan..."

"Did you see Benny?" Bobby was bouncing with curiosity.

"Yeah, he's cute... for a baby." Warren briefly closed his eyes, trying to deal with the pain. Hank's hand descended on his shoulder and McCoy began to examine his teammate.

Remy and Nathan exited the tesseract, which closed and disappeared behind them. Both men were nervous, but for different reasons. Benny felt their nervousness, opened his eyes and grabbed hold of Remy's shirt.

"Oh..." Bobby slowly approached them, and locked eyes with the baby. "Look at those eyes!" Bobby was smitten, goo-gooing, and gaa-gaaing to attract Benny's attention.

Exhausted, Remy's grip on the baby almost slipped. Nathan moved quickly and supported Remy's hold with his hand. "Scott?" Within seconds, Benny was safely in Scott's arms and Nathan led Remy to one of the exam tables. "Why don't you lie down before we head for the boathouse?"

Remy nodded weakly, closed his eyes and gave into exhaustion. He never noticed Hank checking him over.

Logan had watched everything closely, silently. Something about Nathan's smell was familiar and set off his alarms. "You're staying at the boathouse then?"

"Yes," Scott confirmed. "Remy needs rest and he won't get it here." Bobby was still making faces and producing funny noises to entertain the baby. "We already know who gets to baby sit."

Bobby grinned. "I'd love to baby sit. My dates always tell me I'm a big kid anyway."

Knowing Remy in safe hands, Nathan was tempted to leave, but as he looked up he caught Warren's gaze. The winged X-Man looked drained. Just one hour and then I'm gone...

Warren refused to acknowledge the nature of the feelings rushing through him. He couldn't be falling for Essex! It was impossible! Was the other man, the empath, manipulating his feelings? But no, Xavier had taught him how to detect an alien presence in his mind and Essex wasn't touching his! Confused, he struggled to his feet. "I'm heading for my room."

Hank objected. "I advice against that, my friend. I need to examine you thoroughly and then we will set up a treatment plan."

"Forget about it, Hank. I've got some bruised ribs that's it. Don't make a big deal out of this." He swayed as he made his way to the doorway. Bobby moved forward to help him, but suddenly Nathan was already at his side, one hand resting at the small of his back.

"I'll walk you to your room," Nathan offered. You're insane! You can't do this! But his feet carried him into the corridor, escorting Warren. They were already on their way to Warren's room.

Warren's confusion only increased. "Why are you doing this?" He preferred the direct approach. He was too tired to play games. They had reached his room and he pushed down the door handle. Slowly, he made his way to the bed and collapsed on it.

Nathan carefully considered his next move. After closing the door behind him, he remained near the doorway. "You're attracted to me." He liked Warren's directness and preferred being honest in return. "It's the curse of being an empath..."

"Curse, huh? It worked out pretty well for Remy and Scott." Warren pushed some pillows behind his back and leaned into the support. "I can't figure you out... and I have no idea why I'm attracted to you."

Nathan shrugged his shoulders. "When I was still Nathaniel Essex I had male lovers. Society didn't approve of gay relationships, so I kept that aspect of my personality hidden."

"If you like men, then why did you marry Rebecca?" And why am I having this absurd conversation?

"I wanted children and I did love Rebecca, in my own way. But there wasn't any real passion, no lust, no craving. She was a very special lady, but my heart never belonged to her."

Warren suddenly felt uneasy in Nathan's presence. "Why am I attracted to you? It never happened before." He had only loved women in the past, but... something Nathan had said reminded him of his own relationships. Yes, he had loved Candy, Betsy, every woman he had ever courted he'd had feelings for them... but there had never been any wild passion or consuming lust.

"I don't know why," Nathan said, and placed his hand on the door handle, ready to leave. "That's something you have to figure out yourself."

"One more question before you leave!" Warren almost got to his feet, but his protesting ribs stopped him. "Where do you stand in this? You're here, so... Are you interested?" God help him, but he didn't know how to phrase it!

"Interested in you?" Nathan gave him a thoughtful look. "Maybe... I used to be a passionate lover... But... I don't know if this is the right time to consider these things. You haven't made up your mind yet, which is understandable. I didn't see this coming either."

"And you did make up your mind?" Why was he pressuring Nathan like this?

Nathan nodded his head. "As I said earlier, yes, I'm interested. But you need to reach a decision first. Let me know once you've made up your mind." Nathan closed the door behind him and headed back to the lab to help Scott move Remy and Benny to the boathouse.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It's bien bein' back at de boathouse, cher. I didn' mind livin' wit' you at de mansion, mais dis feels way betta." Remy shifted in the bed to gain a more comfortable position. Benny lay contently beside him. Scott had just experienced the first joys of parenthood when he had changed the baby's diaper. Remy had just smiled, enjoying watched his lover pinch his nose shut against the bad smell. "You'd betta get used to it!"

Scott had smiled in return. "You'll be pulling your own weight once you're feeling better!"

Scott now moved over to the bed, watching his lover and child. "I love you, Remy." Remy blushed. Even after all this time, Scott found it adorable. "What?"

Remy's hand moved over his abdomen. "De scar's gonna be ugly, cher."

Scott's heart contracted painfully and he leaned in closer to press a kiss on Remy's lips. "Maybe Hank can fix that once the wound is fully healed? And it doesn't matter how many scars you have, Remy. I'll always love you." Remy's watering eyes caused a lump to form in his throat. "Oh, Remy, you're handsome, but I didn't fall in love with your looks. I fell in love with you."

Remy managed a weak smile. "Cher, hold me?"

Scott moved Benny closer to Remy and then took his lover in his arms. Benny rested safely between them. "What's troubling you?"

Remy briefly closed his eyes. He had a promise to keep. "Creed?"

"I sent Logan, Bobby and Hank to take him to the lab."

"You ain' takin' any chances, sendin' de t'ree of dem."

"I don't want Creed to escape and then come after you again." Scott fingered a lock of Remy's hair.

"Where's Nat'an?"

"He's staying in the guestroom on the second floor."

"I'm glad he stayed, cher."

"I wonder though..."

"What, cher?"

"He seems pre-occupied since we came here."

"Mebbe he needs to adjust to dis new situation?"

"That's probably it," Scott said, reassuringly. "It's time for a nap," he decided. "We didn't get that much sleep these last few days."

Remy sighed blissfully. A nap sounded perfect. Benny moved in his arms, and he reached out empathically, reassuring his son. Benny settled down and Remy surrendered to sleep.

Scott stayed awake a little longer. "Oh, you have no idea how much I love you, Remy..." A scar didn't make any difference. "I'll always love you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nathan sneaked out of the boathouse at midnight. Neither Remy, nor Scott noticed him leave.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Apocalypse hovered above him, mocking him, laughing at his pleas and pain. "Don't... Please don't!"

"You wanted your wings back... Does it matter if they are made of feathers or metal?" Apocalypse laughed triumphantly and dragged his victim over to a metal wall, which reflected their forms. "Look! Look at yourself. You're my Horseman, you're Death! There's only one thing left to do. I need to make sure you won't turn on me... I'll rip your soul apart..."

"No!" Warren thrashed on the bed. Although his chest hurt like crazy, he didn't pay it any attention. He had to get away from Apocalypse. "No, I don't want this! I don't want to be Death! I'm Warren Worthington, Angel... not Death!"

Warren slowly woke up, letting the soothing voice guide him. Opening his eyes, he wondered who had guided him back. "Nathan?" Confused, he stared at the other man, seated on the side of the bed. "How?"

Nathan shrugged his shoulders. "I had just gone to bed, which is still an awkward experience after not having to sleep for decades, and I sensed your fears. I didn't know my powers were that strong, but I clearly sensed your panic so I came here. No one else seems to have noticed."

"You and Remy are the only empaths or telepaths around," Warren explained. "But that doesn't explain why you're here. You could have called Hank or... turned over and gone back to sleep."

Nathan shook his head. "No, I couldn't. Do you remember finding me asleep on that chair?" Warren nodded his head and he continued. "Before you woke me up I had a nightmare... Apocalypse was slicing Remy in to tiny pieces right in front of me. It's been so long since I had a nightmare that I had forgotten how real they can be. If I had still had my powers I might have blown something up in an effort to defend Remy."

"Why are you here?" Warren pushed on. He pulled the comforter up to his chin and only then realized Nathan was shivering. "Want a morning robe?"

"Why I'm here?" He raised a puzzled eyebrow, ignoring Warren's offer. "Why do you think I'm here?"

"My nightmares kept you from sleeping peacefully?" Warren wasn't sure what was going on, but his body was definitely reacting to Nathan's presence; he was growing aroused. "I just can't figure it out..."

Nathan understood. "I don't know either why I'm attracted to you..."

"I think, I..." Warren's voice trailed off. He couldn't say the words just yet. "You'd be warmer beneath the comforter."

"Are you sure?" Nathan knew what that invitation was really about. "Do you know what you're getting yourself into?"

"No, do you?"

Nathan laughed softly. "You're right... I don't know it either... but I'll be damned if I won't accept that invitation." Quickly, he slipped beneath the comforter. Finding Warren moving away from him, he stopped the other man. "Say the words and I'll leave."

"No, this is okay... It's just..."

"You're hard."

Shyly, Warren nodded his head.

"So am I." Nathan decided to take control before things got uncomfortable. "Move over a little."

Warren allowed Nathan to manhandle him into the desired position and suddenly found himself in the other man's arms.

"And now you're going back to sleep."

Now that was unexpected. "Sleep?"

"Yes, you're still healing. We're not taking this any further until you have made a complete recovery."

Warren smiled contently. Maybe he had made the right decision after all. Feeling safe and warm, he dozed off again.

Nathan breathed in Warren's scent and his hands caressed the soft, white feathers. I'd better come up with a way to explain this to Remy... But he wasn't really worried about Remy's reaction. Remy's empathy would tell him he was serious about this relationship with Warren. So many things have happened these last few months... and I'm grateful they happened... really grateful. Lured closer by Warren's peaceful sleep, he fell asleep as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy smiled, staring at Benny, who had grabbed his thumb and was now sucking it softly. Petit, je t'aime... Can' believe I can be dis lucky. I got you and Scott. I didn' do dat bad for a t'ief...

I was... Until you woke me up... And you've got it all wrong. I'm the happiest man alive for having you and Benny... Scott tightened his hold on his lover. You're my soul mate, Remy... My world. Don't ever forget that.

I won', Remy promised, contently. Snuggling up to Scott, he curled his fingers around Benny's tiny hand and felt perfectly happy. His family was complete.

The end

April 2002