Author's Notes: This is the third story in the Singer series,
which was begun so long ago that Carter was still a captain and Daniel still
had long hair! Significant amounts of
time passed between each story, both for myself and for the characters, and I
hope that I managed to capture some of the changes that they went through as
the series progressed.
Tightening
his lips over a curse of frustration, Daniel snapped his book shut with a crack
that resounded loudly in his office, then rested the spine of it against his
forehead. Closing his eyes, he tried
for the thousandth time that day to calm the restless edginess sawing away at
his nerves, but the vision that rose behind his eyelids had him throwing the
book down so that he could pace around and around his work bench. It didn’t help much, not that he had
expected it to, but it was better than re-reading the same line over and over,
never remembering a single word of it.
When
Sam had requested that the Gate be taken off-line for a week so that she and the
technicians could run tests to determine what kinds of safeties built into
DHD’s could be safely over-ridden, he’d been glad. He had a backlog of professional journals he had wanted to catch
up on for ages, personal research that had been simmering in the back of his
mind for even longer, and was generally more than ready for a week or so of
peaceful boredom. Lately it seemed
every time he stepped through the Gate, there was trouble on the other side -
even when the destination was Earth.
The
first few days had been exactly as Daniel had anticipated they would be - calm,
relaxing and intellectually very rewarding.
Though he’d worked out with Jack and Teal’c, had lunch with them or Sam
in the officer’s mess, he’d spent the vast majority of his day in here,
blissfully immersed in the sorts of linguistic and cultural puzzles that he’d
thrived on for as long as he could remember.
Then, bit-by-bit, hour-by-hour, he’d had more and more trouble
concentrating; more and more difficulty just sitting still, let alone
accomplishing anything.
After
a while it began to carry over to his free hours off-base, leaving him roaming
his apartment at all hours of the day or night, unable to stay at rest even
long enough to watch a sit-com on the tv, let alone actually sleep. He tried going to bed anyway, hoping that
the exhaustion nibbling at the boundaries of his endless fidgeting would let
him collapse into sleep. Instead every time he closed his eyes, the
restlessness took an erotic edge, making him acutely aware how long it had been
since he’d had shared that bed.
His
body would all but beg for a lover’s touch, skin thrumming with sexual
anticipation, and his mental theater would feature fleeting images that left
him achingly ready, more erect than he’d thought possible for himself. Most
disturbing was what the visions were of - not rounded, soft womanly curves, not
memories of his sweet time with Sha’uri or even any of the women that he’d
known in his life. Instead Daniel endlessly
re-ran the brief memory he had of the evening when he had walked in on Jack and
Teal’c as they made love, or the one night he had been on the receiving end of
their attentions.
At
first he had resisted giving himself relief, never particularly liking the way
the solitary activity underlined how alone he was. But when he began elaborating - fantasizing if he was going to be
honest with himself - on those memories, adding activities that he once would
have believed had no appeal for him, he surrendered to necessity. It only helped for a short time though; just
enough that he was able to keep from reaching for the real thing.
Just
thinking about that gave him another hard-on, and Daniel was forced to stop
pacing long enough to adjust himself in his pants. A part of him wanted to simply go to Teal’c, explain his problem,
and ask for help. A larger part
reminded him sharply that from all appearances, Teal’c and Jack were still
together, though Daniel couldn’t understand their relationship at all. He’d been far more upset than Jack had been
when the Jaffar had taken a lady lover and planned to leave SG1 for her – which
could have been simple denial on Jack's part.
Yet the two of them were so comfortable with each other, so obviously
friends and teammates on levels that most people could only dream about.
That
confused Daniel in ways he didn’t want to examine closely, and but even more
confusing to him was his own reaction to the pair. When he thought of the simple pleasure of companionship and
chastely sharing the warmth of two bodies pressed close on an icy night, he
almost automatically placed Teal’c in that role. But when his thoughts turned to raw, carnal acts, it was Jack
that he wanted - and wanted very, very badly.
Suddenly
angry with himself, Daniel went back to his book, determined to read it if it
took all night. There was absolutely no
reason he shouldn’t be able to concentrate; it was something he’d been able to
do no matter what almost from the first time he learned to study. Through death, disaster and abandonment, he’d
been able to lose himself in words and civilizations long dead with no effort
at all; the only exception being the time Singer had infected him with her
alien energy.
The
memory of the blue-in-blue energy being who used music for language and glass
as toys brought a reluctant smile to Daniel’s lips. She’d been indirectly responsible for his night with Jack and
Teal’c, too, because of that.
Interestingly, sex had been the cure for the irritating nervousness
prolonged exposure to her presence caused, though Daniel didn’t have a clue
why.
Without
any warning, understanding crystallized and Daniel ground to a complete stop,
mentally and physically, unable to believe what the evidence was telling
him. Painfully, carefully, he looked at
the idea from every possible angle, but it all added up to the same
conclusion. The last time he was this
edgy and restless, with a cutting thread of desire zipping through it, had been
when Singer was with him, and it had accumulated gradually. Singer was invisible to any electronic
device made by man and the Gate did not have to be activated for her to use it
- from either side. She also knew the
layout of the base on the SGC's levels, and was especially fond of his office,
if for no other reason than because he had created a cache of ‘toys’ for her.
Finally
beginning to accept that he might be right, Daniel slowly surveyed his office,
looking for a place some one could hide without being detected, if they were
quiet and still enough. Then, just to
make sure he wasn’t being a complete idiot, he checked the stash of glass
objects he’d accumulated for Singer and had not gotten rid of despite the two
plus years it had been since he’d last seen her. The drawer was empty and in the farthest corner of the room was a
waist high table running across the wall, and the area immediately under it was
blocked with a large crate intended to be used for shipping some off-planet
artifacts he was studying.
Cautiously,
not wanting to frighten her if she were there, he wandered back, leaning on the
table and pointlessly re-arranging the items on it. In a carefully pleased, quiet voice, Daniel said, “I know you’re
under there.” He didn’t get an answer,
but he hadn’t expected one right away, so he slowly knelt down until he could
peer into the dark cubby made by the corner, the table, and the crate.
For
a moment he was sure he had made a mistake, but the sheer impossibility of an
intruder this deep in the mountain made him take a second look, this one
allowing him to recognize Singer. Instead
of the traditional Alice-in-Wonderland garb of light gray dress, pinafore, and
brilliantly polished maryjanes she had dressed in before, she was wearing a
denim bib-coverall with stars appliqued all over it and a white long-sleeve
Henley under it. The buckle shoes had
been replaced with white sneakers, complete with friendship pins in the laces
and more hearts drawn in ink on the sides of the soles.
It
was almost exactly what Cassandra was wearing in the picture that Sam kept of
her in her office, though she had added another, more recent one, of Dr.
Fraiser’s adopted daughter not too long ago.
Singer had ‘seen’ the older one, of course, and she had obviously chosen
to update her clothes so that she would look more human. Normally she couldn’t come close because of
her blue-in-blue eyes and sapphire hair that drifted on invisible breezes, but
the face that turned toward Daniel could have been that of any human child’s.
All
that was missing from it was an expression, an emotion of some kind, but Singer’s
features were as empty as a doll’s.
That frightened Daniel more than finding her in his office; she had
easily learned how to imitate human facial expressions and to match them to
what she was feeling during her last visit.
For her not to be able to do so now spoke alarmingly of just how
distressed she had to be, and adding in how long she had to have been in her
hiding place, Daniel’s surprise changed to concern.
Despite
that, he said casually, “I’m glad to see you; I’ll call Jack and the others to
let them know you’ve come by for a visit.”
“No,
please, D'nelllll,” Singer hummed, the last notes deep enough to make the floor
under them vibrate in harmony. “Don’t
tellll, don’t tellllll.”
“Why? You know they like you. Are you worried about getting in trouble for
coming without your parent again?”
Daniel didn’t think for a moment that was the problem; Lalt had never
struck him as being the kind of parent whose punishments for childish
transgressions would inspire terror in his offspring. But he could sense in the music of Singer’s true voice that she
was close to total despair and fear, and his concern deepened considerably.
“D'nelll,
please, please, please. Don’t telllll,
don’t tellllll.” Singer shrank back
farther into her hiding place, curling up on herself as much as possible.
“Sweetheart,
are you in trouble, bad trouble?” Daniel ventured, staying put and trying to
put as much reassurance into his voice as he could.
“don’ttellllldonttellldontllldontlllll,”
she murmured. For a moment her control
fractured and her natural swirling color returned, writhing sickeningly over
and through her before she was able to reassert the form she’d chosen for
herself.
Sitting
back on his heels, Daniel changed tactics and said firmly, “Look at me,
Singer. Look at me!” Though she didn’t need to have her eyes on
him to actually see him, she obeyed and the softly humming pleading faded
away. “Do you remember Hammond?” he
asked, glad his tactic to pull her back from her misery worked.
She
sang a brief melody that seemed to describe the general perfectly, and almost
as an after-thought, she created a partial smile to go with it. “Mmm’d,” she agreed.
“Well,
he’s the same as a parent to me, and I can’t *not* tell him that you’re
here. That would be wrong, and it would
make him very unhappy with me. I
wouldn’t like that. And Jack, Teal’c
and Sam wouldn’t be happy with me, either.
I have to tell them, Singer. I’m
sorry, but I have to.”
She
turned away from him and huddled into the wall, and the floor began to shake
again as she cried to herself in notes so low that Daniel couldn’t hear
them. Feeling miserable, but with no
doubt in his mind that he was right to bring in the others, Daniel went to the
phone and called the General.
“Sir? Could you come to my office,
right now? And bring the rest of SG1
with you? We have an un-authorized
visitor; one you’ve met before.”
**Unauthorized. How in the….** The shoe dropped for Hammond, and he said, **Singer. I’m on my way, Dr. Jackson.**
Daniel
hung up, listened for a moment as SG1 was summoned to the briefing room, and
went back to where Singer was, sitting cross-legged under the table, back to
the room and facing her. She was still
turned away from him, but at least the horrible droning of her fear had stopped. “It’s okay,” he soothed. “Whatever is wrong, we can help fix it, I
promise.” Instinctively he hitched
closer to stroke her hair or back in hopes of consoling her, but she shrank
into herself even more.
“No,
Daniel,” she said clearly. “I promised
not to hurt you again; to stay all *here.*”
“And
you don’t trust yourself to do that right now?” he asked gently. “Would you tell me what has you so
upset? Please? Funny thing is, even if you think I can’t do
anything to make it better, just talking sometimes can make a difference in how
you feel.”
Shaking
her head awkwardly, as if just remembering that was a way to say no, too, she
asked instead, “Can I please stay here?
It’s a small, small space and you weren’t using it. I can give the toys back if I shouldn’t have
taken them, but you weren’t playing with them so I thought you wouldn’t
mind.”
Her
tone was the coaxing, hopeful voice of a youngster who wanted desperately to
appease the adult in power over her, and for the first time anger began to mix
in with the apprehension Daniel had been hiding from her. With difficulty he shoved it all away so he
could concentrate on Singer, and said, “I think we can do better than a corner
under the table. You know you’re always
welcome, and I keep those toys here just in case you do decide to visit.”
“Reallllllly?”
she sang, the melody showing a hint of her usual merriment.
“Really,”
he said positively. “And Sam still has
seventeen billion gazillion questions she wants to ask you, and would be in
heaven if you’d help her find the answers if you don’t know them.”
“And
Teal'c and O’Neill? They wouldn’t mind
if I played with you sometimes?”
“Absolutely
not,” Jack said cheerfully, dropping into a squat next to Daniel, hand going to
the small of Daniel’s back in a silent gesture of approval.
Or
so Daniel assumed, very deliberately on his part, to combat the flood of sexual
heat from that simple touch. Then
Teal’c gently pushed aside the crate that formed part of Singer’s hiding spot
and took its place, thick fingers finding a comforting place on Daniel’s
shoulder as he knelt down. Somberly, but with a hint of a smile at the corners
of his lips for the alien child, he said, “I, too, am pleased that you would
choose to visit.”
Eagerly,
touching her own face as if to remind herself yet again to contain her
energies, she said, “I’ll be very, very careful, I promise.”
“I
know you will,” Jack said firmly.
“You’re a good girl and good girls always keep their promises.” Her answer wasn’t in words, but in a doleful
note of worry/fear/sorrow that shook the entire room, and he shook his head in
negation. “I’ll prove it to you.” Without any warning he wiggled into her
corner and snagged her by the waist to pull her into his lap as he plopped onto
his backside.
She
didn’t struggle, though it was impossible to tell if that was because she
didn’t know how to in her current form, or if she was afraid of losing control
if she did. Either way Jack didn’t seem
to believe he was in any danger.
Smacking a silly, noisy kiss on her cheek, he said, “See? Not even a
tingle. It’s *okay* to be here, Singer,
as far as we’re concerned.”
Looking
dubious, Singer shook her head again, but she didn’t try to pull away. Resting her head on Jack’s shoulder, she
hummed softly to herself, then asked, “This is a ‘hug,’ Oneillll?”
“Yep,
a little-girl hug. Best kind there
is.” Sam joined them, punching their
commanding officer lightly in the upper arm to get his attention. Jack grinned and tilted his head in her
direction, saying, “I think Major Carter is jealous because she needs a little
girl hug, too. Think you could oblige
her?”
With
a laugh that sounded like a garden full of perfectly tuned metal wind chimes,
Singer let herself be transferred into Sam’s arms, hugging her tightly once
before chirping, “A billion gazillion questions, Sam?”
“At
least that many,” she confirmed. She
and Jack exchanged a look, then she tucked herself under the table with
Singer. “I like the new look; was it
hard to change just part of yourself like that?"
Leaving
their visitor to Sam’s care for the moment, Jack clambered out and stood, hand
under Daniel’s elbow to take him along.
Daniel started to protest, but a side-ways glance from Teal’c brought
General Hammond to his attention, and he braced himself to give the
explanations every one would want. They
stepped out into the corridor, Hammond leading the way and clearly not happy
with current events.
To
Daniel’s surprise, it was Jack who came under fire first. “Colonel O’Neill,” Hammond said sharply,
“What did you think you were doing?
Even if her parent hadn’t told us specifically that the kind of control
needed wasn’t possible, Singer *herself* had doubts that she wouldn’t
accidentally burn one of us.
“She
didn’t and if she did, she could fix it,” Jack answered lightly, hands in his
pockets and rocking back slightly on his heels. At his commander’s exasperated glare he added much more
seriously, “I never saw a kid who needed a hug more. The way I saw it, getting her calmed down and happy was more
important than what I considered a nominal risk.”
Clearly
setting aside the discussion - but just
as clearly not forgetting it - Hammond turned to Daniel. “Dr. Jackson?”
As
concisely as he could, Daniel filled them in on what happened, beginning with his
growing inability to concentrate and ending with Singer’s pleas to be allowed
to stay. He didn’t miss the significant
look Teal’c and Jack exchanged at the mention of the restlessness, but he
willfully let it slide without any acknowledgment that he had seen it. Despite the leap of his heart and the
deep-seated throb of desire, he didn’t *want* to admit to them - or himself -
the state his libido was in from Singer’s presence.
When
he was finished, Hammond asked thoughtfully, “And you have no clue exactly how
long she’s been in your office or why she felt compelled not only to hide
there, even from us?”
“We
know that things aren’t exactly perfect at home, or she wouldn’t have been
slipping away from her Nanny to start with,” Jack volunteered.
“That’s
an assumption on our part, Colonel. For
all we know, her visits are simply symptomatic of another stage of development
for her,” Hammond said. “Her version of
the terrible twos.”
Shaking
his head, Daniel argued, “Maybe in the beginning, though I don’t think so. What I can tell you for sure is that right
now her fear is too genuine, too powerful to just be a developmental
side-effect. This isn’t a case of being
afraid of the monster in the closet; if it were, I’m positive she would have
gone to Lalt. Remember when she
accidentally burned me? When she understood what she had done, she didn’t
hesitate to go to her parent for help, even though she knew she could get into
trouble for running away.”
“Notice
that she *didn’t* go to her Nanny,” Jack said softly.
“In
any case her return may have serious consequences for the SGC,” Teal’c said,
pulling his teammate and friend back to the problem at hand. “If she has indeed slipped away from her
parent again, Lalt will arrive presently seeking her.”
Gleefully
Jack said, “This time he’s not getting away without giving us an I.O.U. of some
sort, even if it’s only a way to call him so that we can let him know we could
use a helping hand. Only fair for all
the babysitting.”
“And
if she bolted here because she’s on the run from something that terrifies her?”
Daniel asked, genuinely worried about their young friend.
“Then
we better hope that Lalt deals with it first,” Hammond said flatly. “Even if it’s harmless to us, I don’t think
we’re equipped to handle a hysterical Singer.”
He paused, thinking for a moment, then said, “I believe that our first
course of action should be to reassure her as much as possible, and that means
doing what we always do when she’s here.”
“Endless
questions on both sides," Jack said.
Then he added hastily, "That’s Daniel’s department."
“See
if you can get her into Dr. Fraiser’s care this time around, gentlemen. Maybe we can walk away from one of her
people’s visits with a few answers for a change. All your missions are canceled for the time being, and all
off-world teams not involved in essential projects will be recalled, simply as
precaution. Dr. Jackson, the sooner we
have a clearer idea of the perceived threat, the sooner we can prepare
ourselves if necessary. I’ll leave you
to get on with it.” Already deep in
thought about what needed done, Hammond turned on his heel and left for his own
office.
“I’ll
go warn Doc Fraiser,” Jack said innocently, all too obviously not looking at
either Teal’c or Daniel.
He
beat a hasty departure before Daniel could respond, and unperturbed, Teal’c
went back into the office, expression inscrutable even to Daniel’s practiced
eye. Sam had coaxed Singer completely
out of hiding, and was smoothing all of the alien child’s hair back into a ponytail. Expecting a comment on how pretty it was,
Daniel was vaguely surprised and amused when Sam said, “So if I tried to cut
this off, the blade would just go right through it?”
“No,
I would go around it, Sam. It’s small
enough that I can do that.”
“Well,
what if you wanted to give me a strand of it, so I could look at it with
something besides normal vision?”
Singer
turned, her hair flowing from the fingers holding it as if it were liquid, and
touched the end of Sam’s nose. Sounding
absolutely serious, she asked, “What else would you look at it with? This?”
Half-laughing,
Sam answered, “With machines that can do more than my eyes can.”
“Machines?”
Singer said dubiously. “I think even
the smallest piece of me would make a machine very unhappy.”
“But
you *could* give me a bit? Without
hurting yourself?” Sam cajoled.
“And
contain it how, Sam?” Daniel asked, honestly curious himself.
Distractedly,
Sam answered, “I don’t know, a magnetic field maybe. A thin metal tube. A
coffee cup. Something.”
Unexpectedly
Teal’c asked, “Singer, could you simply place a small portion of yourself where
Major Carter wishes it to be, then recall it once she had completed her
observations?”
Face
losing its expressiveness in a way that meant she was thinking very hard,
Singer said, “Give me away on purpose?”
Almost
simultaneously, Sam said, “Teal’c that’s brilliant!” Excited, she took Singer by the hand and began towing her out of
the room. “Remember me telling you
about my friend, Janet? She’ll want to watch while you try this, believe
me.” With a soft melody that was both
agreeable and deeply thoughtful, Singer allowed herself to be taken away, Sam
firing off questions as they left.
A
few minutes later her voice drifted back up the hallway, clear and distinct
despite the distance. “Dnllll? What’s more than a gazillion?”
Honestly
smiling for the first time that day, Daniel started to follow her and Sam, but
Teal’c stepped in front of him, one large hand planting itself gingerly in the
middle of his chest and pushing him into a corner where the security camera
couldn't spy. “I would speak with you
for a moment.” Instantly wary, already
sure what the topic of conversation was going to be, he started mentally
creating excuses not to, but before he could voice any of them, Teal’c said softly,
“May I come to your quarters this evening?”
Of
all the things that Daniel could think of to say, what actually came out of his
mouth was, “What about Jack?”
Apparently
not surprised by the question, Teal’c said, “There is not a word in English for
the deep connection one warrior may feel for another. ‘Partner’ is the nearest to the Chulak concept, but it does not
do it justice.”
“I
know the word you’re referring to,” Daniel mumbled, red-faced, understanding
where Teal’c was leading them.
Stroking
two fingers hesitantly over Daniel’s cheek, Teal’c said, “Then you know that if
O’Neill were to meet the perfect mate and marry her, I would only celebrate
that he had found a wife and mother for his children that was worthy of
him. I would miss our intimacy, but she
would be no barrier to the commitment already existent between O’Neill and
myself, nor would I be a detriment to the growing one between them. This is not generosity of spirit on my part,
nor an insult to how dear a companion he is to me, simply a statement of what
we are to one another.
“Nor
do I believe that he would begrudge me the comfort of hearth and home if I were
to be the fortunate one.” Teal’c closed
the small distance between them, fingers slipping down to the back of Daniel’s
neck as if to anchor him. “He does not
expect me to be sexually faithful to him, Daniel.”
Unable
to resist leaning into the heat so close to him, Daniel closed his eyes and
swallowed hard. “I’m…I’m not sure. It doesn’t seem right. I mean, just because Singer has overloaded
my nerves or whatever, doesn’t mean you have to…. Not, not that I wouldn’t otherwise, of course. You know that I find you… but, but.” He
forced himself to take a deep breath, then said carefully, “I feel like I’d be
taking advantage of you.”
Teal’c
dropped a soft, fragile kiss on Daniel’s lips, barely leaving a hint of warmth
and taste before ending it. Those faint
traces left him desperately craving more, and he murmured something that didn’t
make sense even to him as he took off his glasses and reached up to claim what he
needed. Teal'c's mouth was every bit as lush and satisfying as he remembered it
being, and Daniel pulled himself away from it long before he wanted to.
Unwillingly
remembering the lack of privacy, he managed though and murmured, "Are you
sure Jack won't mind?" A subtle
tension that he would have missed if he hadn't been so close to Teal'c flitted
through the massive body pressed into his, and he looked up into the dark, dark
eyes. "You use English very
precisely," Daniel said slowly, thoughtfully. "Jack doesn't expect sexual fidelity from you, but maybe he
expects something else?"
Clearly
hesitant to answer, Teal'c said after a long pause, "I believe that
O'Neill will be...disappointed you did not turn to him for assistance in this
matter."
"Oh."
The word sounded as small as Daniel
felt, and he backed away, replacing his glasses and rubbing sweaty hands down
the outside of his thighs. His
incipient erection flared to painful readiness, then sullenly subsided as his
conscience and desires warred with each other.
"Oh," he repeated inanely.
"Well, then, I suppose that I should, ah...." Trailing off, not at all sure *what* he
should do, Daniel finally blurted, "Check on Singer," and made good
his escape.
He
found her in the infirmary, sitting on the edge of a bed, watching in utter
fascination as Janet and Sam exchanged lab coat and outer shirt, apparently
trying to explain to her that their clothes were not part of them. Apparently thinking it would help her cross
the cultural gap, Janet handed the lab coat to Singer, then had to hold in
laughter as the young alien struggled to imitate what she had seen them
do. “This is *not* you,” Singer said
dubiously, pulling a sleeve over her arm.
“And you and Sam are not mates, not sharing selves.”
Thinking
now was as good a time as any to jump in, Daniel said, “No, someplace far away
a man picked the fibers of the coat from a plant, sent them to a place where
they were made into a fabric. Then the
fabric was sent to yet another place where it was cut and sewn into the coat,
and the coat itself was sent to where Janet could get it to use.”
Clearly
impressed, Singer untangled the other arm, took off the coat and tried again,
this time getting it on properly. “Dr.
Janet must be very important to have so many tending to her.”
“No,”
Sam corrected. “That’s the norm for us;
we trade labor or our own products to each other to have what we need.”
“How
do you get what you need, Singer?” Daniel asked thoughtfully. “Is there a place where you go to get your
toys or sustenance?”
Distracted
by the feel and look of the lab coat, she answered, “My parent or Nanny make
what I need. Sharing is a very personal
thing.”
“That
explains why she thought you two might be partnered,” Daniel murmured just for
Sam’s ears. To Singer he said, “So if
you want a toy, they take a part of themselves and make it for you?”
“No,
because it wouldn’t sing with me if they did that; it would only be for them or
their mate. They…” She lost English and
began to sing a complex melody, stopped, and said carefully, “They would bind
other forces from the many places to the shape of what they wanted to me to
have.”
“Singer,”
Sam said, her eyes brightening almost maniacally, “Do you mean they would
change energy into matter, like taking light and turning it into a glass?”
Bubbling
water over glass chimes sounded, then Singer said delightedly, “Yes! Like
that. Not exactly, but like that.”
“That’s
fantastic,” Sam breathed, and she started talking to Janet in techno-speak so
fast that Daniel didn’t think the doctor understood more than every other word.
He
didn’t get that much, so he turned his attention back to Singer. “Can you do it? Maybe show us how it’s done?” he asked, anticipating Sam’s next
question, once she calmed down.
Taking
off the lab coat and smoothing the fabric under curious fingers, she answered,
“No, I haven’t learned how to reach into the many places, or how to hold the
patterns to what I wish them to be.
Lalt hasn’t been able to find a teacher for me.”
Daniel
thought her last words were sad, simply because she didn’t use any inflection
for them at all. “Well, you’re still a
little young,” he said sympathetically.
He thought maybe the skills she mentioned were the equivalent of reading
and writing, and she was disappointed like any youngster that she couldn’t go
to school yet like the big kids.
“Age
is not how these things are decided,” Singer said matter-of-factly. “My parent can’t get a teacher for me
because I’m retarded and deformed.”
Anger
flashed through Daniel, but he kept his voice level when he asked, “Who said
something like that about you? It’s not
true, and it’s not nice!”
“Oh,
Nanny, of course, but my parent has never tried to hide my differences from me,
or our clan,” Singer said the same way another child might announce she was
adopted. Then, as if realizing that he
was upset, she said sweetly, “It’s okay, Daniel. Different is not bad, is not wrong. It just is.”
“I
don’t understand,” Daniel said in confusion.
“You seem like a very bright girl to me, and I don’t see anything
different between you and your parent at all.
Except the obvious, of course.”
Laying
aside the lab coat and giving Daniel her undivided attention, Singer said,
“When your people create a new life, you take a piece of the protector, give it
to the nurturer, and she grows the infant within her. And you can do this many times.
My people only create new life once, at the end of their own. When mates know that their harmony is
complete, their sharing is powerful, they chose a Parent and a Nanny to raise
their offspring, then combine completely, two becoming one that has all of
both. The source divides, two, three,
sometimes even *four* times, if the pairing is especially right and good.
“But
something went very, very wrong when my bearers merged. There was no division, there was only me,
and I almost was not there enough to survive.
The knowing that they should have left within me is not there, and there
is very little of them for others to sense and know who gave me life.” She looked sad, hair and hands going
still. “I think this makes Lalt very,
very unhappy. Nanny says that he could have had his choice of younglings to
raise, but he deliberately waited for my bearers so that he could honor them by
rearing theirs. That must mean he cared
for them greatly.”
Not
liking where his own thoughts were taking him and reluctantly remembering
Jack’s suspicions about problems at home for Singer, Daniel asked, “Does Nanny
say anything else about you or your birth?”
“Oh,
all sorts of things,” she answered blithely.
“She thinks my parent should not have let me survive at all, probably
because she didn’t want to be held to her promise to be Nanny for me. But also because she thinks that it
dishonors the memory of my bearers to have something like me as their legacy,
as if they must have been damaged themselves to produce me. She didn’t want to raise a damaged child,
either, to put all that care into one only to have it be refused adulthood.”
“Refused adulthood?” Daniel asked blandly
despite his anger getting a serious hold on him this time.
Plainly
growing bored with the conversation, Singer began to poke at the sheets on the
bed where she was sitting, then compare them to the lab coat. “If a child is too damaged to be a good
adult, they are not allowed assistance for their last Growing.”
Afraid
he knew exactly what that euphemism meant, Daniel said tightly, “You mean, like
when you collapsed in on yourself last time.
You have to have help to expand back out after you, uh, ‘reorder your
being’ with the new information.”
Shivering
melodramatically, as if she were a human child talking about the boogey man,
she said, “That was scary; seeing that your kind are even more different from
me on the inside than you are on the outside.”
She hopped forward a little on the bed.
“Did I do the shaking thing right? For the right reason?”
“Exactly
right,” Daniel praised automatically.
“And I’m sorry you had to be shown that in such a bad way. I guess it must have been a good thing that
Lalt came when he did or you could have stayed under that ramp for a long, long
time.”
“It’s
all right, Daniel. You didn’t know that
I hadn’t learned that, yet.” She
shivered again and said happily, “I like how ‘shivering’ feels!” Then, as an after-thought she added, “Not so
long; I would have gotten too cold to hold me here and bled away into the many
places.”
Seeing
Sam and Janet bearing down with several pieces of equipment and a few of
Singer’s toys, Daniel stepped back and let them reclaim her attention, waiting
until all of them were absorbed in an impromptu experiment before slipping
away. Anger, he was discovering, was
not a good mix with the nervous agitation that came from being with Singer. Both twitched and stabbed through his muscles,
stomping over rational thought with ease and leaving him wanting to scream and
shout, wanting to destroy something, anything, even himself, and he mindlessly
sought a quiet, private place to do just that.
Something
- instinct, luck or maybe habit - brought him to SG1’s ready rooms, and he sat
on the bench in front of his lockers, battling with an insanity of violence
that he refused to give free rein to.
Rocking back and forth, hugging himself tightly, he did his best to hang
onto rational thought, but eventually Daniel exploded into movement, slamming
his fists and head into the unforgiving metal.
The pain was a relief powerful enough to make him want to cry, but he
couldn’t. Couldn’t shout, couldn’t
scream, couldn’t stop the lunge forward to hit the locker again, even harder
this time, and the last sane bit of his mind prayed that he’d knock himself
out.
Instead
of cold steel, he crashed into human flesh, his forehead cracking against a
bony shoulder as powerful fingers caught and held his wrists. With an enraged shout he tried to attack the
person stupid enough to get between him and the release into unconsciousness he
had to have, but rage took away any skill he had at self-defense. Within moments his back was pinned to the
cold tiled wall by an unrelenting human chest putting enough pressure on him to
make breathing difficult, his head forced to one side by the cheek planted
against his ear. A knee strategically
planted just under his crotch made the idea of kicking a very, very bad one,
even to the animal presently doing the thinking for him.
Deprived
of freedom of movement, his rage had no choice but to back down a few notches,
enough for Daniel to recognize the man holding him and hear the quiet
muttering. Though he couldn’t connect
meaning to the words, he recognized Jack’s voice and responded to the calming
in it, gradually relaxing into the strong, wiry body against his. He recognized that, too; knew the lines and
contours hidden by the shapeless uniform, knew how responsive and sensual it
could be. Letting his head sag onto
Jack’s shoulder, he took a shaky breath, relishing the familiar spice of his
companion’s scent.
The
last of his anger drained away, leaving only the hunger that had been haunting
him for far too long, and Daniel twisted ever so slightly to drag the erection
he hadn’t even felt until that moment over Jack’s belly. “Please,” he whispered, hardly hearing
himself and not at all sure what he was begging for. “Please.”
“It’s
okay, Danny, it’s okay,” Jack crooned, hand and body gentling their hold. “I’m here, I’m here, but I gotta know what’s
wrong first.”
The
faint drift of air from the words slipped deliciously over the vulnerable skin
of Daniel’s neck and ear, and he turned toward it, toward Jack’s lips and found
them with his own, almost by accident.
Whimpering deep in his chest, Daniel invaded his lover's mouth, tasting
and exploring it with erotic intent and succeeding to judge by how eagerly Jack
returned the kiss. A different kind of
release from the one he had sought in his fury began to simmer through his
middle and he began to chase after it with the same unthinking haste he had
used to seek unconsciousness.
Then
Jack pulled away, staying just beyond reach when Daniel tried to find his mouth
again. “Danny! The answer is yes, and even right now if you
honestly can’t wait, but I have to know what set you off. You’re bleeding here!”
Unwillingly,
but drawn back to reason by the command in Jack’s voice and the worry in the
velvet gaze, Daniel closed his eyes and tilted his head back to distance
himself from temptation. “Singer. She’s going to die; her own people are going
to kill her by doing nothing when she needs them most.”
“What!?”
Jack said, taking a step back in shock and anger.
Feeling
the withdrawal all the way to the pit of himself, not sure if he was miserable
or relieved that the intimate contact had been broken, Daniel recapped his
conversation with Singer. He finished
by saying bitterly, “The worst part of it was how accepting she was of her fate. I don’t know if it’s because she’s too
immature to understand what death means or if she’s been beaten over the head
so long and so hard about how ‘deformed’ she is that she can’t imagine fighting
for her own survival.”
“Told
you there was something wrong at home,” Jack muttered uneasily, kneading at the
back of his neck. “Do you think that’s
why she was so panicked earlier?
Because it’s getting close to time for her to do that rock up thing of
hers again and she’s afraid they’ll leave her like that until she dies?”
Sinking
down onto the bench, Daniel studied his shaking hands without really seeing
them. “No, it doesn’t fit with how
calmly she talked about the whole thing.”
A drop of red splatted onto his knuckles and he touched a finger to the wetness
on his forehead, realizing for the first time he’d hurt himself. Dismissing it, he added, “It might have a
lot to do with why we met her, though.”
“Gotcha
- Nanny’s not bothering to take good care of a kid that is pretty much a waste
of space in her opinion. And they’re
supposed to be soooo much more advanced than us.” Jack sounded disgusted, not that Daniel could blame him, but then
his tone changed completely to wary concern.
“You got a grip on things now? Enough for me to get you back to the
infirmary for Doc Fraiser to look at that knot on your forehead?”
“It’s
not that bad,” he said tiredly. “I’ll
go to my quarters and lay down with an ice pack on it for a while.”
“I
don’t think so,” Jack said sharply.
“Fraiser will look at that and you being alone is *not* an option at the
moment. If you’ll remember, I’ve been
on the receiving end of the Singer-jitters myself and have a pretty good idea
of what they’re doing to you. If you
don’t want company of the more personal kind, fine, I can’t very well order you
to get laid, but I can order for you to be put under observation so you won’t
have any more up close and personal encounters with the base fixtures.”
Daniel
glared at him, or tried to, but Jack was right, whether he liked it or
not. Sensing the hurt hiding under the
command persona, he admitted quietly, “I just don’t like having the choice of
whether or not I have sex taken away from me; it’s happened too damned many
times. I like it even less that you and
Teal’c think that you have to help me take care of my little problem when
you’re not responsible for it in the first place.”
“Did
it feel like I was just offering a buddy a pity fuck?” Jack asked gently. “You know you’re more to both of us than
that, so don’t insult everybody concerned by belittling what we could share,
okay Daniel?”
“I’m
sorry, I didn’t mean it like that,” he protested immediately. “I just meant, oh, hell, I don’t know what I
meant.”
Putting
a hand under his elbow and urging him to rise while handing him the glasses
that Daniel didn't remember losing, Jack said, “For a man who knows as many
languages as you do, you sometimes really have a problem talking, know that?”
“Story
of my life,” Daniel mumbled, but let himself be led away, gratefully leaning on
the ready support when his head finally caught onto the fact that it wasn’t in
such good shape.
They
walked into the infirmary in time to see Singer’s hands stop glowing as a
broken glass reformed itself into one piece.
“It wants to be like that,” she was saying seriously to Sam, ignoring
the instruments both she and Janet were holding near the floating glass. “All I do is give it a way to be what it
wants to be.”
Either
not seeing or caring about their preoccupation, Jack snapped, “Could we have
some help here?”
Startled,
Dr. Fraiser looked up, then hurried toward them, but somehow Singer got there
first, fingers already reaching for the wound on Daniel’s head, chiming her
concern and sympathy. Her fingers felt
cool and misty on the tight pain, then with a flurry of the warm tickles he
remembered from when she healed his burn, all the discomfort was gone. Not just the knot on his forehead, but the
nasty gnawing edge to his restlessness and the underlying fatigue that had been
blurring his every thought and move vanished under her careful touch. The relief was incredible and he sagged,
weak-kneed from the unexpected sense of well-being, and would have fallen if
not for Jack.
Then
powerful arms curled around him, and he was lifted and carried toward a
bed. “Teal’c, I’m all right, she just
caught me off-guard, that’s all.”
“Dr.
Fraiser will be the judge of that,” Teal’c rumbled uncompromisingly.
“Don’t
argue with the man,” Jack seconded.
“Singer?”
Dr. Fraiser asked sharply.
She
said confidently, “It’s even easier than making the glass whole again. Daniel
can repair himself; I just.” Stopping
for a second she sang to herself, as if she needed to phrase it in her own
language before trying to express it in English. “Hurried him along?”
Dr.
Fraiser used an alcohol wipe to clean away the blood, fingers gingerly probing
at where the swelling had been on Daniel’s head. “What happened anyway?” she asked.
“Stumbled
into a locker,” he mumbled, not looking at Jack and hoping that he wouldn’t
feel compelled to be a good team commander and tell the doctor the truth. Teal’c raised a single eyebrow of disbelief
at him, but held his peace and slanted a glance at their friend.
“I’ve
already sent a repair crew to fix it,” Jack quipped lightly, meeting the Jaffa’s
look with a telling one of his own.
“Left quite a dent in it.”
The
skeptical glare she gave him told Daniel that she didn’t buy it completely, but
she didn't make an issue of it. She
checked his pulse and other vitals, then planted both fists on the edge of the
bed. “No downplaying - any headache,
dizziness, nausea? Can you tell if
you’ve had any kind of reaction at all to Singer’s touch?”
“Same
sensation as the last time, but much more briefly,” he said honestly, “I feel
fine now. Better than I did when I got up this morning.” He couldn’t quite keep an edge of surprise
out of his voice when he reported the last, which must have been exactly what
Janet needed to be convinced.
She
looked over at Singer and asked, “Is he going to need to rest and eat the way
he did last time?”
Singer
tucked her legs under herself to float in midair and said, “No, it was a very
small wrongness.” Leaning up on his
elbows, Daniel looked over at her, worried because she had lost all the
inflection in her voice again, then frowned because she looked different,
somehow.
Before
he could put his finger on the change, Jack said, “In that case, we need to go
have a word with General Hammond. You,
too, Doc. Looks like Singer could use a
break from the poking and prodding, anyway; one of your orderlies can keep an
eye on her and holler if we’re needed.”
Not giving any of them a chance to protest, he nodded toward the door,
looking stern, then led the way out.
Daniel
got up hurriedly and trailed after the others, glancing back at their visitor
as he did. Jack was right; she seem
tired somehow, though there was no expression on her face to point to
that. Which, for her, actually could be
a sign of being tired, now that he thought about it. That wasn’t what was nagging at him about her, though, but he had
to shelf the matter when Jack said as soon as they got out of earshot of the
lab, “Daniel learned something from Singer we all have to know.”
“When?”
Sam asked curiously.
“When
you were caught up in the discovery that her people can convert energy to
matter,” Daniel said evenly.
“The
two of you were talking about how her people reproduce,” Janet said in
confusion. “We *were* listening.”
Daniel
nodded, but said, “I don’t think you heard all of it, or maybe didn’t understand
the implications behind what she told me.”
When Sam started to ask another question, he added, “I’ll fill you in on
everything as soon as we get to the briefing room.”
An
hour later that had felt more like an eternity as it slowly dragged by, Daniel
sat back in his chair, fingers endlessly twirling his pen, unable to look at
the others seated around the table. As
neutrally as he could he finished his explanation with, “If anybody thinks that
I’m misreading the information, I’d love to be proven wrong.”
“Is
there any chance that she didn’t understand completely or didn’t interpret
correctly what she’s been told, Dr. Jackson?” General Hammond asked, anger
faintly underlining his words.
“Of
course, she’s a child,” Daniel said without hesitation. “Or her Nanny could have fed her
mis-information for whatever reason. If
that’s the case, we’ll be doing her parent a great service by letting him know
what’s going on in her head and why.
But given her repeated escapes from her guardians and Lalt’s own
reaction at what is apparently a unique ability to contain her energy
completely within herself *before* she had to for ‘growing,’ I’d have to say
there’s at least some accuracy in her beliefs.”
“He
was *not* pleased,” Teal’c agreed. “He
is also by his own admission in our debt. Perhaps we can use this to our
advantage to protect Singer.”
“If
he won’t,” Daniel said firmly, tossing the pen down. “I’ll ask if I can have custody of her.”
“Dr.
Jackson, I’m not sure that I can allow that or even advise you that it would be
a wise idea,” Hammond said in surprise.
“While I’m sure you would make a good parent, I don’t think you can
provide for a child as unique as she is.
We don’t even know what she uses for nourishment!”
“Actually,
I was thinking of asking for help in that,” Daniel said, his mind unexpectedly
prodded into providing an answer for the problem because of the General’s
mention of his parenting abilities.
“Oma is an energy being, and she’s already raising a unique child.”
“Good
idea,” Jack approved. “Shifu could use
a baby sister; teach him a few of the more basic things about the human
condition.” He swiveled his chair back
and forth several times, clearly deep in thought, then said, “Here’s a idea for
you. She was trying awfully hard not to
be found and got pretty upset when she was; add that to the fact that she needs
to be ready to rock up to visit with us safely. Much as I hate to suggest it, could she be trying to commit
suicide? And don’t say she’s a little
young to understand that concept; for all we know that’s something her *Nanny*
explained to her very carefully.” His
disdainful emphasis on the title underlined his opinion on that being.
“Much
as I hate to admit it,” Dr. Fraiser said slowly, “That could be one
explanation.”
“I
don’t think so,” Sam argued immediately.
“Once she was sure of her welcome, she was as enthusiastic and cheerful
as always; just as eager to learn and willing to work with us. Why bother if she’s going to die in a few
hours or days?”
“I
believe that we’ll leave that mystery to Dr. Jackson,” Hammond said
firmly. “If anybody will be able to get
a straight answer in time to be able to help, he can.”
Not
sure the general’s confidence wasn’t misplaced, Daniel stood, glad he had an
excuse to be up and moving. “In that
case… Sam, do either you or Janet have something to share that I need to know
right now? Because if it can wait, I
want to get back down to the infirmary and get to work before it’s too
late. I’ve got a feeling we might be
working against the clock.”
“Agreed,
Dr. Jackson,” Hammond said.
“I’ll
brief you later,” Sam promised.
With
a wave of acknowledgement in her direction, Daniel left, stopping at the top
step of the stairs to eye the large, bulky shadow that he had acquired. “Teal’c,” he started.
“I
am obeying orders,” the Jaffa said calmly.
Then he said much more softly, “And the dictates of my own heart,
DanielJackson.”
Smiling
uncertainly, but smiling for all that at the small admission, Daniel said,
“Hammond wants us working in pairs because of the effect Singer has on humans?”
“A
wise precaution, “ Teal’c agreed easily.
Daniel
stared at him a moment longer, desire threading through his regard, lacking the
frustrated bite from earlier in the day, replaced by a much sweeter anticipation
that was easier to cope with. It didn’t cloud his judgment as badly either, and
he finally nodded, agreeing to more than Teal’c accompanying him to the
infirmary. All during the short trip
there, he wondered why he’d made the decision he had, then admitted that it was
because with Teal’c, it was ‘what you see is what you get.’ The Jaffa was straightforward and direct in
all things, making him a known quantity to deal with and a source of strength
that Daniel knew he could count on.
Jack was the complete opposite - a major example of deep waters, and he
simply didn’t know if he had what it took to navigate the treacherous currents
a relationship with him.
At
the threshold to the infirmary, he asked himself, **Is that what I really want?
A relationship? Not just relief?**
Daniel didn’t know the answer to that, and he eagerly put the question
aside to concentrate on Singer.
She
was floating where they had left her, her collection of glass objects arrayed
in the air around her, singing softly to herself. Idly wondering if any one had given her other kinds of crystals,
such as pyrite or amethyst, to see if she was as fascinated with them, Daniel
studied her for a minute. The sense
that there was something different about her nagged at him, and he said aloud,
“I’ve never seen her more human looking; even the shade of her hair could just
be one of the more extreme dye-jobs you see in any suburban mall. I am so used to her in her natural form that
it seems wrong to see her any other way?”
“Perhaps
it is because she truly looks like a child,” Teal’c offered. “Instead of an adult dressed as one.”
Mentally
comparing her size to the first time she had taken a roughly humanoid form,
Daniel said, “That’s right. She’s usually at least Jack’s height; but now she’s
about Janet's. Trying harder to look
right? Or compressing herself even more
in preparation for the 'growing' that might be coming up?”
“I
do not know,” Teal’c answered.
“Let’s
ask and find out.”
Some
time later, Daniel had to admit that her endless variations on ‘I’m supposed to
be this way, Daniel,” were getting him nowhere and he had no idea where to
redirect the conversation to find more useful information. Singer talked about her Nanny, her parent, her
people without hesitation, showing no fear or distress, and painting a fairly
clear picture of what he had always thought a true, workable socialism must be
like. The only time she balked was when
he tried as gently and obliquely as possible to bring up why she was with them
instead of her parent, and if Lalt had any idea where she was.
Then
she would turn her head down, her hair slowly drifting to hide her face, and
she would murmur to herself in her own musical language, stubborn and unhappy
echoing in the notes in equal portions.
No amount of coaxing could get her to respond then, though if Daniel
changed the subject, she would go along with him happily, doing her best to
explain what was at times clearly inexplicable in English.
In
the background he could hear Janet, Sam and the others coming and going. Sometimes they stopped and listened, or
offered a comment, but for the most part they concerned themselves with the
scientific part of the mystery that was Singer. Eventually the hour grew late, and the medical staff left for the
night except the standby team that usually spent their hours in the officer’s
mess playing cards unless they were needed.
Janet retired to get some rest, but Sam went back to her own lab, still
excited enough by the sparse information her observations had given her to be
unable to sleep. That left him and
Singer, with Teal’c patiently watching over them both as if he were a bodyguard
entrusted with precious wards.
Tired
of talking in circles around what he had to know, Daniel decided to do something,
anything different, just to give them both a rest. Catching sight of a bloodstain on hands that he hadn’t had time
to wash, he asked, “Singer, can you repair anything besides injuries for a
human?”
“I
don’t know,” she answered seriously.
“What else would one need fixed?”
“Uh,
we get diseases - uh, small lives that invade ours and damage us in the small
places,” Daniel said.
She
looked him over thoughtfully, then said, “You already have small lives in you,
and on you. They sing that they are needed
for you to be well.”
Vaguely
remembering that there were helpful bacteria in a human’s digestive tract,
Daniel tried another tact. “And if they
didn’t sing in harmony with me?”
“Your
body would try to battle wrong ones.” She stroked a finger lightly over the
back of his hand, considering what she read from the touch. “I think that I could make you strong enough
to be sure to defeat them.”
“And
if something in the body went wrong on its own?” he asked thoughtfully, his
bout with appendicitis at the back of the mind.
“That’s
easy; it really wants to be right. I’d
just show it how to be the way it’s supposed to be.”
An
idea hit Daniel suddenly and gestured to his teammate to bring him closer. “Can you put Teal’c back the way he
was?” For once he’d surprised the Jaffar
to the point he couldn’t keep it from his expression, and before his friend
could regain his composure, Daniel lifted the shirts to show the opening to the
symbiote’s pouch.
Singer
sang a questioning note and studied the seared flesh for a moment before
tentatively reaching for Teal’c’s stomach.
“This was done to him?” she asked uncertainly.
Holding
his companion’s eyes, praying that the tiny flare of hope he saw there could be
answered, Daniel said, “Yes. A bad
person took away a part of Teal’c that he needs to live and put an awful thing
inside him to replace it.”
“Why?”
She sounded completely confused, her fingers hovering over the center of the
‘x’ sliced into what would have otherwise been a perfect six-pack of abdominal
muscle.
“To
control me, as he and his kind have controlled so many others,” Teal’c said
harshly.
Losing
all of the color she had imposed on herself, her face emptying of emotion, she
sang, “Hooollllldd stillllll!” Her
hands became nothing more than brilliant beams of light that illuminated the
infant Gao'uld within Teal’c, somehow highlighting its loathsome nature and
showing it for the monster that it truly was.
Noise spilled from her in ugly clashes of metal on metal that hurt the
ear and mind, then she said in an eerily echoing voice, “I can’t fix what’s
been done to you; the damage was too long ago and too burned into your
being.” The light coming from her
intensified, forcing Daniel to turn his head and close his eyes against the
cutting glare. “It’s a wrongness for
you to be like this; a bad, bad wrongness that has to be stopped.”
“What
are you doing!” Daniel shouted, suddenly terrified for his teammate. “You can’t kill it, you’ll kill Teal’c!”
The
light began to fade and Singer murmured, “No killing; that’s a wrongness,
too. It tastes its own poison, now.”
Squinting
against the dying glare, Daniel found a phone, dialing for Sam almost by
instinct, as he tried to find Teal’c in the midst of the radiance. When he did, he saw that the Jaffar was
standing with his spine snapped almost inhumanly straight, his head thrown back
and mouth open as if to silently scream, hands slightly away from his sides,
fingers spread wide. Amazingly, his
face did not show the agony Daniel expected from his posture, but ecstasy that
seemed almost too intense to be endured.
That pleasure echoed in his own body, bringing him to full readiness in
a few breaths and taking most of his brainpower off-line.
Hearing
Sam’s voice in his ear, Daniel said hurriedly, “Singer’s doing something to
Teal’c - get here quick.” He didn’t
hear her hang up; the phone had already dropped from nerveless fingers as he
was pulled almost against his will toward Teal’c, the last of the vanishing
glow coming from the powerful body summoning him as surely as a crooked finger
and soft smile. On the periphery of his
awareness, he knew that Singer had lost her human shape entirely, and had
drifted up toward the ceiling away from people and machines, her toys going with
her. That didn’t really mean anything
to him except that she wasn’t between him and Teal’c.
Then
he was close enough to touch, and he did so with a single shaking finger over a
lush lower lip, licking at his own as if Teal’c had returned the caress. Ebony eyes opened and the lust in them would
have made Daniel skitter away any other time, but now it was only a mate to
what already owned him. He stretched up
as Teal’c bent down, but before their mouths could connect and consummate their
passion, Sam crashed into the room, shouting Daniel’s name.
It
was enough to jar him back to sanity, and he jerked away a step. “I got the brilliant idea,” he said in
self-disgust, unrelentingly holding Teal’c’s gaze, “Of asking Singer to fix his
immune system so he wouldn’t need Junior.
She couldn’t, but she said something about stopping the wrongness, then
lit up like a star going nova.” Not
daring to risk a glance at her to see what she was making of his standoff with
Teal’c, he asked, “Would you see if you can get her calmed down? I’ll take care
of him and see if we can figure out what she did to Junior.”
“Don’t
you think Janet….” Sam started to say.
“No!”
Teal’c interrupted harshly. Then he
spun on his heel and marched double time out of the infirmary.
“I’ll
call if he needs her,” Daniel promised hastily and ran after him. Working on the assumption that Teal’c would
be looking for the sanctuary of his quarters, he headed in that direction,
trying very hard not to think about what would happen when he found him.
As
he rounded an intersection in the corridor, a substantial arm snapped out and
caught him by the waist to drag him into a small nook. In the split second he had before Teal’c
nailed him against a wall, Daniel recognized the spot as one of the odd
cul-de-sacs created when rooms had been added to what had once been a missile
silo. “No security camera,” he had time
to think clearly before thick fingers fastened into the hair on the back of his
head to force it back for a devouring kiss.
“But
not private!” he babbled to himself, seriously torn between giving back as good
as he got and shouting a worried refusal.
His arms were caught between him and Teal’c, and he pushed at the
unyielding wall of the Jaffar’s chest, fists beating at his shoulders in a vain
attempt to express his unwillingness to be taken here, of all places! The self-defense moves Jack had taught him,
the do or die ones that he shouldn’t use unless he *would* die if he didn’t,
surfaced for a moment, but he pushed them away, unwilling to hurt his friend
and teammate. Hearing footsteps coming
up the corridor toward them, he writhed frantically, trying to break free of
the embrace, even though all he really wanted to do was give in and let Teal’c
have him. If nothing else, it would end
his eternal confusion as to who he really wanted in his bed.
“What
the hell do you two think you’re doing?“ Jack barked.
Opening
eyes he didn’t remember closing, Daniel met Jack’s blazingly angry and hurt
glare, but couldn’t break free of Teal’c to say anything. Stepping up his struggles, he tried to grunt
what he hoped sounded like a request for some help, here, and his distress must
have gotten through. Jack frowned,
looked both ways to check for other people in the hallway, then stepped into
the small recess. “Daniel? Teal’c?” he asked,
more unease than anger in his voice now.
To
Daniel’s relief, Teal’c broke their kiss, growling something obscene-sounding. The he nudged Daniel into a corner and
body-checked him into it as his free hand shot out and dragged Jack in to take
Daniel’s place. Jack’s eyes widened
almost comically as Teal’c claimed his mouth, and he started doing his share of
shoving and fighting.
“I
think he got an overdose of Singer’s aphrodisiac effect,” Daniel panted, not
trying to get past the elbow and hip corralling him. "I’m not objecting to giving him what he needs, but I
couldn’t convince him to wait until we were someplace safe.”
Jack
shot his thumb up to acknowledge that he heard, then he moaned softly, as if in
spite of himself and relaxed marginally in Teal’c’s hold. His fingers drummed for a moment on a broad
shoulder as he thought, then he beckoned Daniel closer with a waggle of those
same fingers. With no idea why Jack
would want him to, Daniel squirmed in until he was pressed tightly against
Jack’s side, ducking under Teal’c’s arm to do so. Though he shouldn’t have been, all things considered, he was
surprised when Teal’c murmured approvingly and left Jack’s lips to take his
again.
Then
it vanished under a new onslaught of demands from his own need, and Daniel gave
up all thoughts of resisting a moment longer.
He did his best to return the thrusts and flicks from Teal’c’s tongue,
barely hearing Jack’s worried whispers.
“Teal’c,
lover, it’s *dangerous* for Danny to be seen like this, not *safe* for him at
all. You’ve lived with us long enough
to know the kinds of things that happen to people labeled *fag.* Think Matthew Shephard here.” The emphasis on the key words of Jack’s
warning was barely there, but enough for self-preservation to rear its head in Daniel’s
mind as he went very, very still.
Apparently it roused something in Teal’c as well; he lifted his head
with a pained groan, reluctantly leaving Daniel’s lips.
“O’Neill?”
he said with some effort. “I must.”
“You
will; we will,” Jack said hastily.
“Just not here. Some place
safe.”
“Where?”
“Damn,
what’s close?” Jack muttered to himself.
He leaned out to peer back into the corridor as if to orient himself,
then said, “We’re only few halls away from one of the workout rooms. You know the one I mean, Teal’c?”
“I
do.”
“Will
you go ahead and wait for me there?”
This time the answer was a chest-deep rumble and a tight grip on
Daniel’s upper arm and Jack’s hip.
“I’ll take that as a no.” He
looked over at Daniel. “Any bright
ideas on how to get him there without attracting attention?”
“Yes,
but I’m going to hate myself in the morning for it,” Daniel answered. In Teal’s native tongue he said
quietly. “Do you trust me? Trust O’Neill, your lover and brother in
arms?”
“Of
course,” Teal’c snapped in the same language.
“Then
do as we ask. We would not demand this
of you if it were not necessary.”
Daniel lowered his voice to an intimate, husky whisper. “We *will* be with you in all ways this day;
only death could stop us.”
Teal’c
studied him for a moment, reason shining through his mad lust. With a barked “Kree!” that was agreement and
extreme irritation, he left so abruptly that Daniel staggered as the mass
holding him against the wall vanished.
“Do
I want to know what you said to him?” Jack said, forcing a light tone.
“Let’s
just say that I’d make a good Jewish mother,” Daniel muttered unhappily.
“Hey,
it worked.” Jack suddenly found the
floor fascinating and asked, “How long do you think I’ll need to cover for the
two of you?”
Guiltily
Daniel admitted, “He’s expecting both of us.
I, uh, kind of promised.”
“You
okay with that?” Jack asked, voice and face empty.
“I’m
terrified of all of it,” Daniel said with total honesty for Jack’s sake and his
own. “But I’m tired of running from myself
and the two people I care for most. For
a little while all I want to do is *feel.*”
“And
when it’s all over in the morning, are you going to pull away again? Pull so far back into yourself that you’re
hardly a member of the team, let alone a friend?” Jack asked sharply.
“Didn’t
work the last time, did it? If nothing
else, I’m not stupid enough to repeat my mistakes,” Daniel answered without
rancor. “Now you’d better go. I don’t
have a clue what will happen if we wait too long to help Teal’c.”
He
took it as a show of faith and trust that Jack patted his shoulder once,
awkwardly. "It's the workout room
across from the armory on this level," he said quietly, then left,
affecting a casual stroll.
Refusing
to let himself think, to let the self-doubts and anxieties take over yet again,
Daniel closed his eyes and leaned back on the wall, giving himself permission
to enjoy the anticipation running like quicksilver over his nerves. Tomorrow would be soon enough to concern
himself with how he was going to juggle having two lovers, both men, all of
them bound to a time and place where no relationship was simple or easy, let
alone a homosexual ménage a trois. For
now it was incredibly erotic to envision having both of them in all the ways
possible to know lover.
He
withstood the imperative to make the mental images real as long as he could,
but all too quickly his body forced him into action, though he managed a sedate
walk instead of the full-speed run that he wanted. Not giving himself a chance to think, Daniel slipped through the
door to the workout room as soon as he reached it, locking it behind him as his
eyes adjusted to the dimly lit space.
Though he could hear the rasp of harsh breathing, for a moment he
couldn't see either Jack or Teal'c, then he turned slightly to find his lovers
hidden away in a small alcove created by lockers and equipment.
For
the rest of his life, just thinking about the moment he saw them would send a
sexual thrill straight from gut to heart, and at the second when it did happen,
desires too long denied threatened to send him to the floor, helplessly
climaxing. Jack was on his knees in
front of Teal'c, pants hanging open as he roughly stroked himself, head moving
in frantic haste as he worked his lover's thick cock with his mouth. He didn't look as if he could stop if his
life depended on it, but if he had tried, the heavy hands clutching at his
short hair in desperation wouldn't have let him.
As
incredibly arousing as that was, it was the un-concealed ecstasy on Teal'c's
face that hit Daniel the hardest. It
pulled at him as if it were a tether connected directly to his hard-on, and he
stumbled toward his lovers, taking off his glasses and putting them in a shirt
pocket, not at all sure what he was going to do once he reached his
lovers. Teal'c didn't have that
problem. The instant Daniel was within
reach, he grabbed him by the collar and dragged him in to take his lips, tongue
plunging past them in rough imitation of the rhythm Jack had set.
Groaning,
accepting the urgent invader eagerly, Daniel humped against a broad thigh,
fingers gently threading over Jack's head for no other reason than to make a
connection with him. Teal'c began to
rip at Daniel's clothes, trying to get them off, and he helped as best he
could, more than willing to be skin-to-skin with his lovers. Once he was naked, he started doing the same
for Teal'c, reluctantly breaking their kiss so that he could kneel down to get
rid of the boots without forcing Jack to release his prize.
It
was hard not to be distracted by being so close to Jack's avid adoration of
Teal'c's cock; it was obvious that he loved sucking the huge thing, taking it
so deep in his throat that Daniel honestly didn't know how he could breathe. Then he would slide his lips off of the
shaft slowly, pausing with the plum-dark crown just inside his mouth as he
licked at the ridge and prominent vein just under it. For some reason the vivid pink of his tongue against Teal'c's
dusky flesh was mesmerizing to Daniel, and he leaned in to take his own taste,
absently setting aside the last boot as he did. For a moment he and Jack dueled for possession with lips and
tongues, then Teal'c moaned a warning and came, his seed jetting onto Daniel's
lips and chin.
Murmuring
happily, Jack cleaned it off with silky swipes, and Daniel stole tiny kisses
from him as he did, getting his share of the wetness. Then a tug on his hair made him look up at Teal'c, his hard-on
jerking and bouncing against his belly at the sight of the unabated lust
burning in the unguarded gaze. Not even
remotely surprised that he still needed relief, Daniel took the proffered
bottle of oil, asking with his eyes who should be opened for use.
"Jonathan?"
Teal'c asked.
Pulling
away from the hard length he had returned to sucking, Jack whispered,
"Both of you, just like this.
Damn, if you knew how many times I've thought about it, you wouldn't be
asking."
Hands
shaking, Daniel set aside the lube and started divesting him of his clothes,
lavishing licks and kisses on bare skin as it appeared. When Jack was naked, moaning nearly non-stop
from the attention being heaped on him, Daniel said unsteadily against one
shoulder blade, "Don't let me hurt you.
Hear me? Don't let me hurt you. If I do something wrong, tell me to
stop."
Releasing
his mouthful, Jack grumbled, "You're killing me now. Get *on* with it." He looked over his shoulder and added
tightly, "I'm a battered old whore, Danny. I can take whatever you need to dish out."
Grabbing
him by the jaw, Daniel kissed him fiercely, then said, "Don't talk about
yourself like that!" Not giving
his lover a chance to argue, he gently pushed him back toward the cock he had
been servicing, fingers delving between the cheeks of his backside to find the
opening to the lanky body. The fragile
tissues quivered under his questing touch, and he massaged carefully around
them, not at all sure what to do next.
Drawing
on the memories of the time Jack had opened him for Teal'c, Daniel opened the
bottle of oil with his free hand and let a tiny trickle of it flow down the
shadowed cleft, using his thumb to guide it to its destination. The hiss of a sharply indrawn breath told
him that he was doing something right, and encouraged, his own demanding need
forgotten for a moment, he smoothed the thick fluid over the tense pucker. It opened for him, admitting a single
finger, and Daniel froze, the tight heat surrounding that lone digit nearly
erasing what was left of his self-control.
The
only thing that kept him from yanking his hand away and ramming in was the fact
that, despite his lover's words, the snug channel felt too delicate for that
kind of abuse. Helplessly he looked up
at Teal'c for guidance, and a calloused thumb caressed his cheek
reassuringly.
"More
oil," Teal'c said. "Yes, like
that, slip into him. A little
more...." His words trailed off to
a near growl as Daniel followed his instructions, pumping his finger in and out
with growing confidence. It helped that
Jack was making ecstatic little noises, his channel fluttering around the slick
probe as if to pull it in deeper. When
he was riding back on Daniel's hand, as if to take the entire thing in, Daniel
could take no more. He set the head of
his cock at the rim of Jack's opening, still half-afraid to enter, but his
lover took the decision away from him.
Jack reared back to impale himself, screaming his pleasure around the
mouthful of steely flesh still filling his throat.
Nothing
– no self-gratification, no fantasy, no previous encounter, *nothing* - had
ever prepared Daniel for what it was like to be sheathed in the incendiary
clasp of Jack's body. Too stunned and
overwhelmed to be able to move, all he could do was stare down at where he
vanished into the perfect ass, palms bracing open the cheeks to see better. His hesitation didn't faze Jack at all. He rocked wantonly back and forth between
the two cocks piercing him, keening his joy until Daniel worried he might hurt
himself.
Dazed,
the imperative to come crawling hotly down his spine, Daniel looked up at
Teal'c yet again, this time for encouragement, or perhaps approval. He didn't know for sure, but discovered that
Teal'c was as fixated on their lover's sexual frenzy as he was. Lips parted for harsh pants, he fed Jack his
hard-on with barely controlled stabs, eyes roaming from the wide-stretched lips
to the grasping hole.
As
if feeling Daniel's gaze on him, he said hoarsely, "I have never seen him
give himself with so much abandon."
Roughened fingertips drifted lightly over the bobbing head and wide
shoulders, as if afraid that stronger contact would derail Jack's mad pursuit
of pleasure. "I believe he is
going to find his satisfaction without so much as touching himself."
"Oh,
God," Daniel muttered, that last bit of information finally destroying the
flimsy reins left on his caution and restraint. "Oh, God, Oh, God!"
He began answering each of Jack's thrusts with powerful lunges of his
own, trying to force his lover farther onto Teal'c's cock even as he tried to
pound deeper in the yielding ass. With
a pleasure that was nearly pain from being withheld so long, his seed began to
rip its way out of him, jetting into Jack in white-hot spurts that took all
Daniel's strength with them.
He
fell onto his lover's back, barely able to brace himself so that he didn't have
to bear the full burden of his weight.
Then Jack released Teal'c with an obscene slurp, and laid his cheek on a
corded thigh. "Coming," he
moaned. "Teal'c...Danny...uhhhhh..
coming!"
The
soft caress of the sensitive flesh holding him drove away trace of relief
Daniel had found from his own finish, and he began gently pumping again. Not hard or demandingly; just long, slow
strokes to encourage Jack's pleasure and to work toward a climax that could
finally free him from the clamoring demands of his own body. Planting nibbling kisses on Jack's shoulders
and neck, Daniel worked his way up to a bristled jaw, swept his tongue over the
strong line of it, then, on impulse, onto Teal'c's thigh, savoring the abrupt
change in taste and texture.
When
he reached the furred sacks drawn up so tightly against the straining shaft, he
gingerly mouthed each orb, rolling them with his tongue and marveling at their
firmness. Teal'c needed to come again,
and needed it badly, he realized, but was somehow managing to let him set the
pace. Grateful, and more than a little
thrilled by being in command of such strength, Daniel lifted his head and
licked at the darkly purple head of his lover's hard-on, then sucked it into
himself, going as far down on the thick shaft as he could before his gag reflex
made him retreat. Teal'c shouted, then
drove into Daniel's mouth, flooding it with hot, bitter fluid that he hastily
swallowed, save for the last few drops, which he shared with Jack in a lazy,
sensual kiss.
Teal'c
began to sag, legs buckling to either side of his lovers as he slid down the
wall to sit on the floor. For a moment,
Daniel considered pushing Jack down on top of the powerful body, then covering
him, but as they shifted to accommodate their change in position, he heard
battle-weary knees protest with a loud creak.
Reminded that Jack had been on them on the cold, hard floor for a very
long time, Daniel withdrew carefully from him and sat back on his heels. With a tired but happy sigh, Jack turned so that
he was sitting back against Teal'c, idly stroking his still hard length.
It
was compellingly erotic to see him sprawled lazily over the willing support of
Teal'c's considerable bulk, the evidence of their shared pleasure glistening on
his stomach. Drawn by it, Daniel
started to lick him clean, but before he could begin, Jack said hesitantly,
"Wait, wait. You got a clear head
here?"
"Mostly,"
Daniel admitted.
"You,
Big Guy?" Jack asked, tilting back his head to look at their lover.
"I
regret...." Teal'c began.
"Don't
start," Jack said at the same time Daniel blurted, "Never,
ever." They exchanged a single
glance, then Jack went on for both of them.
"This was strictly mutual; the only problem I have is that this
isn't the best time or place. I vote we
move this to my place; bigger bed.
Softer too."
"I
don't think we should leave the base until we find out why Singer is here
again," Daniel protested, half-heartedly.
The erection poking straight out at his lovers had its own opinions on
what they should be doing.
"And
Teal'c needs to have Fraiser look him over; no arguments," Jack said
sternly.
When
the Jaffar merely gave his best silent wall impression, Daniel said for both of
them, "There's no hurry for that, is there?" He understood all too well the powerful urge
not to let his lovers out of arms' reach.
Jack
bounced a look back and forth between them, then said reluctantly, "If you
still need...."
"Not
need," Daniel denied hastily.
"We can wait for, uh, more intimate things until we're off
base." He thought for a second,
then said, "Rest might be a good idea; I can't remember the last time I
had a good night's sleep."
"And
when Singer did a number on you, the prescription was to sleep sandwiched
between me and Teal'c. Doesn't sound like
a half bad idea for Teal'c right now, not to mention no one will think twice
about it if we explain our absence that way." Jack nodded to himself, decision made. "My quarters or yours?"
***
Daniel
kept expecting it to feel strange or awkward to be in Teal'c and Jack's company
while they made a bed on the floor of the Jaffar's quarters for the three of
them. At the very least he expected
conversation to lag or stumble around any suggestion of what they had just done
together. But they washed up, dressed,
left the workout room talking easily about what little Sam had learned about
how Singer functioned, as if their passionate interlude had never
happened. Apparently not needing to
discuss sleeping arrangements at all, they lay down with Daniel between the two
older men, Teal'c on his back for kal-no-ree.
Draping his arm over the Jaffar's waist, Jack spooned up behind Daniel,
who did his best to go to sleep, but wound up staring into the flickering
shadows from the candlelight, mind endlessly trudging along the ruts he'd
created for himself long ago.
“The
middle of the night is not the time to be asking the big questions,” Jack said
softly and unexpectedly.
“Big
questions?” Daniel asked, almost automatically, since he had a pretty good idea
what his lover meant.
“You
know, like why did I ever get in that car with Catherine, where would Earth be
now if I hadn’t figured out that the symbols were addresses, does sleeping with
my best friends really mean I’m gay or just adventuresome? That sort of thing,” Jack reeled off lightly,
almost believably so. “Stuff like that
can drive you crazy in the wee hours because the questions seem a lot bigger
and a lot more important in the dark.
In the day you can usually keep a better perspective on it all.”
“Actually,
I dealt with the last one a long time ago,” Daniel said, surprising himself by
being upfront. “I think I’ve always had
the potential, but I grew up traveling to so many place where it wasn’t just
unacceptable, it was deadly, that I had it labeled as ‘dangerous’ in my head
and stayed away from it. Part of what
I’m having trouble coming to grips with is the chance we’re taking to be
together.”
“I’m
not going to lie to you and tell you that there isn’t one, or that it isn’t as
bad as you think,” Jack said slowly.
“Not with the kind of scrutiny SG1gets from the brass, not to mention
our little problem with NID. We’re
never going to be able to be open and above board - like moving in together or
any of the other stuff normal partners do.
Not until I retire, at least, or we get pushed out of the SGC.” Brushing the knuckles of one hand over
Daniel’s cheek, he added gently, “But it is soooo worth it.”
Closing
his eyes at the caress, he confessed, “Yes, it is. Maybe that’s the scariest part of all.”
To
his amazement, Jack said, “For me, anyway.”
Stomach
dropping painfully, Daniel swallowed hard at that simple declaration, the
desire he’d never quite lost flaring bright and high again. Nuzzling at the hand so close to him, he
fought not to do more, to ask for more.
“I wish there was a way to make it easier for you.”
“One
thing,” Jack said cautiously. “A
promise, sort of.”
Suddenly
worried, Daniel said, “Let’s hear it.”
“Don’t
let me or Teal’c be used against you,” Jack said flatly without a trace of his
usual smart-ass attitude. “Not
blackmail, not ‘political pressure,’ no noble act to protect us, nothing. Someone comes to you with full 8x10 glossies
of us el flagranto, wanting you to do something for them, you hold up a single
finger and tell them to take a spin on it.
Then high tail it straight to me and Teal’c and let us know; we’ll be
through the Gate for Chulak or Abydos or wherever ten minutes later. Nobody says I have to protect Earth *from*
Earth; it’s just easier.”
“Your
career?” Daniel asked.
“Over
before we got dragged into fighting the Gao'uld; fighting them is the only
reason I came back. They can have the
pension, court-martial me, hold me up in the press as a good reason why gays
shouldn’t be in the military. I don’t give a shit.” Voice and expression deadly serious, Jack added, “The only thing
that I won’t tolerate is being torn away from you and Teal’c.”
“Hence
the trip to Chulak.” Daniel thought
furiously, then said, “Done. But I want
an equal promise from you.”
It
was Jack’s turn to be worried. “Yeah?”
Taking
a deep breath, mentally and physically, Daniel said, “Forgive yourself if I die
in the line of duty, especially if it happens while I’m obeying an order from
you.”
“Ouch.” Jack buried his nose in the nape of Daniel’s
neck, then muttered, “I don’t know if I can do that. Never been sure if I could.”
Shivering
from the barely perceptible movement of lips on sensitive skin, Daniel forced
himself to concentrate. “Look at this
way. I’m not a solider; I *chose* to
join SG1, choose to obey orders and take the risks of being in battle or
exploring off world. There’s no way you
could force me to play it safe and stay at home - not and expect me to *be*
home when you get back. If anybody’s to
blame for my death, it’s me.”
“I
*know* all that; every commander knows that.
It just doesn’t make much of a difference sometimes.” Jack snorted in amusement. “We’re going to have some real shouting
matches over this, aren’t we?”
Grinning,
Daniel answered, “As if we haven’t already?”
“And
Teal’c will raise a ‘oh-so-superior’ eyebrow at both of us,” Jack went on. “Then when we’re finished, he’ll drag us off
into the bedroom and make us forget why we’re arguing in the first place.”
“Is
that how he handles close calls?” Daniel asked, honestly curious.
“I
couldn’t walk right for a week after… Hey, I was just teasing, Teal’c.” Jack leaned up on one elbow, hastily
reaching for his lover as the big man abruptly sat bolt upright, eyes wide.
“I
cannot sense the Gao’uld within me,” Teal’c said, sounding more shocked than
Daniel had ever heard him. He reached
under his shirt, fingers digging into the pouch burned into his abdomen. “It is physically there, but not moving, not
aware of my presence.”
“Fraiser,
now!” Jack ordered, getting to his feet.
“No arguments.”
Daniel
did the same, then went straight to the phone, calling the doctor to the
infirmary. Though personally, he wanted
to run, Teal’c wouldn’t be rushed, and it took far too long in Daniel’s opinion
for them to get him to Janet. While the
Jaffar sat on one of the beds explaining what had happened, beginning with
Singer’s reaction to the symbiote, Daniel drifted over to where Sam was
sitting. Though she was had her laptop
open, her attention was mostly fixed on the young alien floating up near the
ceiling, and Daniel looked up at the amorphous energy mass, watching the many
shades of blue drift through it, wondering not for the first time if they held
any meaning.
“Has
she spoken at all since we left?” Daniel asked.
“Not
so much as a hum,” Sam answered, shutting down her computer. “One thing… Is it my imagination or is there
less of her than there used to be?”
“I
noticed she was smaller than the last time we saw her.” Daniel glanced worriedly at his lovers, then
added absently, “Thought she was trying to look more like a human child.”
“I
don’t think that’s it,” Sam said slowly, fingers carding through her short hair
as she considered her words. “Remember
what she said about not being able to stay ‘rocked up’ as the colonel calls
it?”
Forcing
himself to listen to Sam, Daniel said, “She would bleed away into the many
spaces.” Comparing for himself how
large Singer was now to the first time he saw her, he added slowly, “Could she
have meant that literally? She would
just melt away?”
Clearly
unhappy with where her conclusions were taking her, Sam frowned and admitted,
“It’s possible; it’s what happens to any form of energy that doesn’t have some
mechanism supporting it, and we still have no clue what she does for
sustenance. And don’t forget, the way
she keeps us safe from her natural form is close to the same technique used for
‘growing.’ Add that to how long she
could have been hiding in your office and I can’t help thinking that she is
slowly dissipating.”
“Damn.” Daniel looked up through the transparent
layers of a thousand shades of blue, then said quietly, “Is that what’s
happening, Singer? Are you leaving us
permanently?”
She
didn’t answer, but before he could try again, Janet motioned him over. “You were in here when she touched Junior?”
the doctor asked briskly, removing electronic leads from both the Jaffar and
the infant Gao’uld.
“Not
touch,” he denied instantly. “More like
lit it up so it couldn’t hide.”
Replaying the scene in his head, he said thoughtfully, “It eats its own
poison, she said. I'm guessing you
can’t find any neural activity, right?”
Not waiting for an answer, he called up
to Singer, “It can’t live outside of Teal’c now, can it? It has to stay in him and be his immune
system.” With soft gasps of hope or
shock, the other members of SG1 clustered around Teal’c, waiting for her
answer, apparently content to let Daniel take the lead in questioning her.
With a melodious tinkle of glass as her
toys drifted to a tabletop, she dropped to the floor, taking on her human shape
and staying well back until she did.
“It was a bad, bad thing that could only do more badness if it grew to
what it wanted to be,” she said sternly, with only a trace of uncertain defiance
underneath it.
“Evil,” Daniel corrected by habit. “It was evil. And you stopped the evil by making it do good, by making it keep
Teal’c alive.”
“It was the best way to create
balance,” she said, this time not trying to hide her hope for approval for her
actions.
For a stunned moment no one reacted,
then Daniel swept her into his arms, not caring if she burned him from head to
foot. Amid a babble of excited
questions and comments, he whispered softly, “Thank you, thank you, thank you. That was the perfect thing to do, the best
balance that any one could have thought of.”
Then Teal’c was gently prying him away,
his great hands handling Singer as if *she* were made of glass, his cheeks wet
with silent tears. “There is no deed I
would not do for you,” he said solemnly, fingers stroking hesitantly over her
shoulders. “No boon that you could ask
that I would refuse. Do you understand,
Singer? You have given me what I had
never thought I could truly have again: my freedom.”
“It should not have been taken from you
in such a way,” she answered, equally solemn.
“I had to do what I could. No
deeds, no boons, not for fixing what was wrong.”
“Oh, for cripe’s sake,” Jack
half-laughed, half-shouted. He caught
her up and dizzily spun her in small circles until she was laughing with him in
crystal notes. “You did good,
kid!” He collapsed into a chair, Singer
in his lap, and said much more soberly, “You did real good.”
Unexpectedly serious, Singer asked,
“Then something evil can be good, too?”
Almost instinctively Daniel knew that
they could get her to talk, finally, if they could just ask the right
questions, themselves. Or maybe give
her the right answers. Coming to kneel
at Jack’s side, taking one of her hands in his, he said, “Sometimes. Sometimes it can be forced to, like you did
with Teal’c’s symbiote; sometimes it happens accidentally. Once in a while, there can be a change of
heart - evil can want to be good.”
Acting on a hunch, he said carefully, “Or sometimes it isn’t really evil
at all; sometimes a mistake was made or it was misunderstood. Singer, did you do something that you Nanny
told you was evil after you did it?”
Hushed exclamations told him the rest
of his team and Dr. Fraiser understood where he was leading the conversation,
but Daniel kept his focus on Singer.
For a moment her eyes changed, becoming pools of deep space, but they
quickly shifted back to their human guise.
“I didn’t know it was bad, honest, Daniel, but Nanny says that only
proves that I’m evil.”
Mentally consigning that particular
entity to whatever hell Singer’s species considered worse, Daniel asked gently,
“What exactly did you do? I promise I won’t get mad at you, no matter what.”
Singer had never learned how a human
would show shame in their expression, so her face stayed calm even while her
voice warbled in and out of the musical accents from her own language. “I like this shape; I like the way it moves
and the way you can use all parts of you to say things, like shivering and
eyebrows. When my parent saw that I
did, he told me that there are many peoples who use a form like it, all of them
a little different, all of them talking in different ways with their body, and
he told Nanny to show me some so I could play.”
She hesitated, to Daniel’s mind having
trouble finding the courage to speak. The others all but held their breath, clearly not wanting to
interfere. It was hardly the first time
he had been their voice, and he relegated their audience to the back of his
mind to wait patiently for Singer to go on.
After a moment of uneasy murmurings that he felt through her skin, she
said, “When Nanny was holding me, trying to chose what shapes to show me, I saw
all the ones she thought about. I
didn’t know I wasn’t supposed to look!
I didn’t know that I wasn’t supposed to be able to taste them well
enough to be able to try them by myself!”
“She didn’t know you did it at the
time?” Daniel asked carefully, trying to understand what Singer thought she had
done wrong.
“Not until she found me practicing one
while I was playing in my nursery,” Singer said sadly. “I wasn’t trying to hide it; I wasn’t! I thought we hadn’t done them yet because
she wanted me to get the ones she picked right, first! She wouldn’t believe me, and went to my
parent, demanding that I be Slept because I was a very, very bad person who
would grow up to do awful things."
"He didn't listen to her, did
he?" Jack said sharply.
Singer shook her head, though the
unhappy rumblings of her real voice didn't stop. "Lalt knows that there is much that I should have received
from my mother and father that simply isn't in me. He doesn't care when I have to be told what isn't nice or what
shouldn't be done. And he *likes* that
I can do things that I'm not supposed to, mostly; surprises are good,
sometimes, he says."
"Good for him," Daniel said
firmly. "So he told your Nanny
that he didn't think you'd done anything wrong, and wouldn't have you, uh,
Slept."
"She got mad," Singer
confirmed obliquely. "Real mad,
and went to...." She stopped, obviously fumbling for the words she needed
to explain what happened next.
"Those of my kind who decide for all when there is not one
voice?"
Because of what little he did know
about her socialistic culture, Daniel suggested, "Council?"
"That word will work," she
agreed. "She went to the Council and
complained that Lalt was being blinded by his feelings my bearers, then told
them why I was a wrongness that should be stopped." Singer pulled her legs up to her chest and
wrapped her arms around them, making a small, small ball of herself in Jack's arms.
Without hesitation Daniel said,
"She's mistaken. Your parent
thinks so, we think so, and anybody who has a chance to talk to you for more
than five minutes would agree with us.
Nanny has her own reasons for not wanting to take care of you any longer;
you told me so yourself."
"Council didn't talk to me,"
she whispered miserably. "I don't
understand all the reasons why they sided with Nanny – Lalt said that politics
was one disease that all sapient people have, but that doesn't make any sense
to me."
She dismissed her parent's comment with
a puzzled measure of music, then went on unhappily, "There is a way to
argue with Council, to show that you don't agree with them and convince them
you're right. Lalt chose to do
that. It's not a safe thing to do, not
safe at all, and the ones who watched over me during Council don't think he'll
succeed."
Understanding all too well the lengths
a child would go to keep their parent alive and well, Daniel said, "So you
ran away again, so that he wouldn't have to risk himself. No Singer, no reason for the Council to test
Lalt."
A glimmer of eagerness flashed over
Singer's face, and she uncurled a bit.
"At the very least they'll have to let him search for me, but I
came the slidey, slippy way that grown-ups are too big to use and can hardly
see at all. And he was so upset that I
could contain myself and not hurt you that, I, I, I, didn't tell him I could do
it anytime I wanted and not just when I was Growing." She said the last in a rush, as if torn
between pleasure that she could finally share her secret, and guilt that she
had had one to start with.
"Anytime?" Daniel asked in
surprise.
"I don't understand why grownups
can't do it whenever they want," she answered. "It's not that different from folding yourself into a shape;
you just make the edge different.
Not wanting to let her – or himself –
sidetracked, Daniel ignored her last comment and said, "So your parent
won't find your 'taste' in the Hall of Portals, and thinks you wouldn't come
here if because it's too dangerous for us.
You hid really well."
For the first time, Jack spoke up,
obviously speaking for the rest of the team.
"I don't think that was the right thing for you to do,
Singer." At her startled, unhappy
noise, he added hastily, "That doesn't mean you're bad or anything; it
just means you made a mistake.
Everybody does once in a while, even Lalt. Otherwise he would have been more careful about telling you when
you could come back the first time you visited. Said so himself."
Seeing her begin to huddle back in on
herself again, Daniel asked for her, "Why a mistake, Jack?"
"Because sneaking out on your
parent like that makes it looks as if you *are* bad, like you're afraid that
Lalt can't win his fight with the Council," Jack said as gently as
possible.
"But he could *die!*" Singer
burst out, proving that she had at least some idea of the consequences of her
parent's actions. "Better me than
him!"
Shaking his head, Jack said, "I
don't think Lalt would agree with you on that one. If he went to bat for you against the big guys, he has to think –
just like we do – that you're very special.
More than worth risking his life for, same as you're doing to protect
him. Don't let him down by not backing
him, Singer. That's one of those
mistakes that keeps hurting a long, long time."
"Dan'lll?" she sang
plaintively.
"He's right," Daniel said
softly. "The absolute best thing
that you could do for your parent is to trust him. The way things are now, even though he'll live, he'll always
wonder what he did wrong raising you."
Deep-throated bass cords rumbled
through the room, then Singer asked hesitantly, "You're sure?"
Stretching up to hug her, Jack's secure
hold not withstanding, Daniel said, "I'm sure. You have to go back; tell them you needed to think to understand
what Lalt was doing, and why. It's the
truth, you know."
"Scared," she whispered, the
word not even a disturbance of air in the too quiet room.
"It's okay to be scared; you
should be. But that shouldn't stop you
from doing what's right, either," Daniel said, worried that they were
giving her too many adult concepts to absorb too quickly, and that she was too
young for some of them.
But she sighed in a long, hushed ripple
of high 'c' scales, then asked, "Carry me back to the Portal?"
Guessing that she wanted the comfort of
being held as long as possible, Daniel exchanged a glance with Jack, then stood
and moved away as Jack said cheerfully, "Sure. O'Neill's taxi at your service."
They made for an interesting, if solemn
procession down the corridors to the Gate room, with Daniel and Teal'c flanking
Jack with his nearly insubstantial burden.
After scooping up a few instruments, Jane and Sam trailed after them,
shooting Daniel a sheepish, apologetic look though he understood their reasons
perfectly. Singer didn't try to talk to
them again, but hid her face against Jack's shoulder, her hair cloaking her
almost to the waist.
Once in the Gate room, she solemnly
gave every one a final hug, lingering for a moment with Teal'c, as if making
sure that her healing hadn't come undone.
Jack tried to make her laugh with a razzberry to her cheek, but all she
managed was a faint smile and extra squeeze for him that did nothing to brighten
the sorrow in his eyes. Then it was Daniel's
turn, and for a split second he honestly didn't think he was going to be able
to let her go, but she carefully, determinedly pulled away, her fingers petting
his cheek as she did.
"It's okay to be scared," she
repeated back to him, then took one of her toys from her pocket and held it out
to him. It was a glass sphere, about
three inches in diameter and the color of Singer's eyes when she was in human
form, but as he watched, it shifted to another shade of blue, this one darker
and more vibrant. "Sam wanted me
to try to leave a piece of me someplace else," she explained at his
startled look. "I put me in this;
the, the, the pattern of the glass all the way through will hold this tiny bit
safely, I think."
She offered the toy to him again, and he
hesitantly took it, mildly relieved that all he felt was the slick coldness of
the glass. "Don't you need all of
you before you go through?" Daniel asked uncertainly.
With a tinkling chuckle, she glided a
few feet up the ramp. "A little is
always lost in cold places like this; I won't miss that small part." Serious again, she mimed twisting the glass
ball between her palms. "If you do
that, it will sing to you in my voice."
Without thinking Daniel did as she
indicated, and staggered back a step at the burst of music/images/feelings in
his mind that totally encapsulated the person that was Teal'c. Somehow Singer captured in a single instant
of sensation the satin brush of his lover's skin, the powerful grace of his
hands and body, the deep, controlled timber of his voice and gentle melody of
his smile, and all the things that couldn't be known from the surface. As surely as he if he held them in his
hands, Daniel experienced Teal'c's abiding loyalty and devotion to SG1, his
deep-seated guilt and remorse for his time as First Prime, the equally
formidable need to make restitution and give retribution for that horror.
When the barrage was over, he blinked
and tucked the small sphere close to his chest as if afraid of dropping
it. "Is that what you call a
'taste?'" Daniel asked hesitantly, not ashamed of the awe under the simple
question.
"Yes," Singer hummed softly,
slowly losing her human shape and drifting closer to the Gate. "Just a few tiny, tiny ones, so you'll
know that I'll always carry you and yours with me, Dan'llllll. And so you'll know if I no longer sing; if
that falls silent, so have I."
At a loss for words, Daniel started up
the ramp after her, but Jack gently caught his elbow. They exchanged a look filled with worry and fear, and it steadied
him enough that he could hand the glass ball to his lover and say simply,
"Thank you, Singer."
With a single note that said both
'you're welcome' and 'goodbye' she flowed onto the abruptly appearing event
horizon of the Gate, then was gone.
Holding up the toy to the light and
watching the leisurely tumble of blue through it, Jack said quietly, "At
least this time we'll get an answer to the big question."
Epilogue
Sinking into the chaise lounge on the
deck behind Jack's house, Daniel looked up at the summer's night sky and
wondered where in that vast emptiness a little girl whose touch could either
kill or heal lived. Holding up the gift
she had left behind, as countless other people had done that day, he looked at
the stars through its blue filter, wishing he had more than the faint glow of
light for reassurance that Singer was well.
And hoped that they had somehow given her as much as she had given them
this time.
"She'll be okay," Jack said
quietly from behind him. With a nudge
he had Daniel scoot forward so he could sit behind him, long legs stretching
out on either side of his on the heavy wooden lounger. "We have to trust that Lalt knew what
he was doing. How'd you manage to bring
that home with you, anyway? I would
have thought the big brains wouldn't have let it out of their sight."
Folding his fingers over the glass
sphere, Daniel leaned back into the support being offered. "I didn't give them a chance to claim
it," he admitted. "Just walked
out the door with it before they could argue the fact that it was a gift to
me. Pretty much the same way Teal'c
took off when he had enough poking and prodding from Sam and company."
"He's taking a shower now to get
the gunk from the electrodes off," Jack said wryly. "He spent almost as much time hooked up
to machines as Singer's miniature miracle there. How many different 'tastes' did they find, anyway? I went into overload at seven and went to
catch a shower and nap; then did nothing but dream of how she saw Sam, Teal'c." He paused and his voice took on a trace of
the wonder that all of them still felt.
"You."
Stomach quivering from his memory of
Jack's 'taste,' Daniel answered, "Eleven." A moment later he added thoughtfully, "Which seems like a
strange number for her to use, since her native language is music. Not many 11ths in music."
"Is that what you were muttering
about when I dragged you out of the shower so we could make good our escape and
do a little celebrating? Maybe that's
all she could fit in." Jack said lightly.
Finally smiling slightly at the
celebrating that his lovers had told him they had in mind, Daniel tilted back
his head and asked, "Are we private then?
The house checked out?"
Beginning to tug and pull at buttons on
Daniel's shirt, Jack said, "As much as we can be. I know it seems like we're overdoing it
checking for bugs, but since Sam got spied on at her place, I don't want to
take any chances. Even got perimeter
alarms on the property for when I'm star gazing."
"I'm not objecting," Daniel
said mildly. "Just wanted to make
sure it was okay to do this." So
saying, he set his glasses and the gift on the nearby table, undid the top
button on his pants and pulled down the zipper. Moving his lover's hands down to the erection that had been
growing from the moment Jack sat down with him, he thrust gently into the loose
grip, moaning quietly at the touch.
"Christ....Danny!" Jack
muttered, bucking up to press his own hard-on into the tempting backside so
near it.
Not giving him a chance to say more,
Daniel twisted awkwardly and claimed Jack's mouth, caressing the sensual lips
with a sweep of his tongue before slipping past them to deepen their kiss. Without once losing that intoxicating
contact despite the angle, they tore at clothes, both of them high and rampant
by the time they were naked. Finally
needing to breath, he broke away and hitched himself higher into his lover's
lap, spreading his thighs over Jack's in a blatant request for what he
needed.
Daniel felt the protest in the
long-limbed body behind him and opened his eyes to calm himself enough to be
able to argue, then lost every thought he had at the sight of their other lover
watching them. Teal'c was standing in
the doorway to the house, his naked form haloed by the candles burning behind
him, the flickering light playing hide and seek over his taut muscles and sleek
lines. The distance between them
prevented Daniel from reading his eyes or expression, but the erection he so
proudly sported spoke volumes.
Thankfully Teal'c had a bottle of
massage oil in one hand, a towel hanging forgotten from the other, and Daniel
opened his legs wider, sure that Teal'c was staring intently at where Jack's
cock brushed the underside of his.
"I want him in me," he said quietly, knowing that Teal'c would
understand that it was important to him that Jack take him, though he didn't
know why himself.
"Teal'c," Jack started
desperately.
Before he could finish whatever he
meant to say, Teal'c swiftly crossed the space between them and gracefully went
to his knees beside the lounger, stretching over Daniel to silence Jack with a
hard kiss. Sandwiched between the two
of them, Daniel could do very little except wait for the silent debate to be
over, hands restlessly playing over what parts of Jack he could reach, his
mouth exploring Teal'c's chest as he hovered so close to his face. A soft groan reverberated through his back,
then an answering one shimmied over his front, both sounds doing inexplicable
things to his skin and the need stretching tightly all through him.
An oil-drenched hand found its way between
his legs, and Daniel voiced his own cry of pleasure as Teal'c pressed Jack's
hard-on into the valley between his legs.
The head nudged gingerly into the base of his balls as the heated shaft
branded the delicate tissues of perineum and anus, and Daniel fought with
himself to stay still and let Teal'c handle things his way. At least the argument over who was going to
be entered seemed to be over. Flinging
one arm over Daniel's chest to secure him in place, Jack gently rocked into the
hand holding him, doing interesting things to Daniel's body along the way.
A moment later a finger gingerly
penetrated him, nearly sending Daniel helplessly into climax, but somehow he
held off, though he could hear himself whimpering. For several long, sweetly tormenting minutes Teal'c stretched
him, even as he covered Jack's cock with oil, teasingly stroking along the
length of it with his palm as he opened Daniel. When he couldn't stand it any longer, Daniel tightly clutched the
arms of the lounger and shifted position so Jack's hard-on was at the right
angle to enter him.
"Now," he mumbled, tucking
his heels up against his bottom to get his legs out of the way. "Now, now, now...."
"Yes, now," Jack agreed, his
voice so raw-sounding that it rubbed over Daniel's hearing like another kind of
touching. "But easy, easy. No hurry, here, Danny. No hurry at all."
Teal'c pressed a soft kiss onto his
forehead, murmuring, "Slowly, my love.
It *will* hurt at first, but not for very long." Then he guided Jack's cock so that it was
just inside the tight ring of muscle, and Daniel did his best to relax, letting
his lovers keep control of this critical moment. A second later he discovered that Teal'c had, like always, stated
only the simple truth: pain burned into
his ass, splintering through the desire that had commanded him for what felt
like forever.
Before it could totally destroy any
pleasure that might come from penetration, Teal'c took Daniel's hard-on into
his mouth, effectively countering the harsh pain with a heated pleasure so
intense that for a moment Daniel tottered on the knife's edge of
consciousness. Then the conflicting
sensations melded, good absorbing the bad and transmuting it into a wonderful
thing that sang along his taut nerves and made him eager for his lover to begin
moving inside him. As it was, all that
kept him from taking what he wanted was Teal'c's hands holding him by the hips
as his full lips slid up and down Daniel's length.
When he was all the way in Jack
kissed/bit Daniel's shoulder, shaking from holding back for so long. "Can *not* believe how fantastic you
feel," he muttered.
"Jack," Daniel whispered,
nearly ready to scream from frustration.
Or cry, he wasn't sure which and didn't really care. "Move!"
As if unleashed by that single word,
Jack's cock thrummed, then carefully withdrew from the tight sheath holding it,
only to return fast and hard. It was
exactly what Daniel had needed, had wanted for so long that he couldn't stop a
choked scream of relief, and, finally released from Teal'c's hold, he met
Jack's next thrust with a powerful one of his own. Rising up to fill Teal'c's luscious mouth, then sinking down to
take all of Jack's cock, Daniel mindlessly took what he had to have, the tension
spun throughout his body growing with each stroke.
His frantic fucking went on for a long,
long delicious time, then Jack growled, "I'm close, I'm
close...." He began pinching and
rolling Daniel's nipples between his fingertips, slamming up into him with so
much strength that the chair shook under their combined weights.
Without warning, the tautness inside
Daniel simply shattered into innumerable splinters of ecstasy, hurling him away
from awareness of anything except the tremendous relief surging through every
nerve he had. When he drifted back to
himself, body limp and pliant, mind hazy with an arousal that hadn't been
completely sated, Jack was shouting his own release, soothing the ache in
Daniel's ass with the flow of his seed.
Teal'c rumbled approvingly, gave a last gentle lick to Daniel's still
nearly erect cock, then began nibbling and licking his way up Daniel's
torso.
Snagging a deep, sweet kiss for himself
as soon as Teal'c was close enough, Daniel reluctantly let him go to share one
with Jack, absently deciding he could get used to being in the middle when it
came to love-making. Then he glanced
down between their bodies and saw Teal'c's hard-on; all he could think of was
how good it would feel inside him, and how badly his lover must want
completion. With shaking hands he
grabbed the oil set next to the chair and filled both palms with the warm
fluid. Wrapping them around the shaft,
he stroked up and down the thick length, watching in fascination as the
uncircumcised head appeared and disappeared in its sheath of skin.
Teal'c moaned and started to reach down
to stop him, but Jack caught the errant hand.
"No, he wants it, wants it bad.
And he's ready for you lover – loose and wet from what you made me do to
him. Made me fill him with my
come."
Going very, very still, Teal'c almost
stopped breathing, and Daniel realized that 'talking dirty' was exciting for
the big man – a guess backed up by the way the cock he held was jerking, as if
will power alone kept it from spilling its load. "Jack's right," he said quietly. "I can't wait for you to do me. I don't want you to hold back at all; I want
it as fast and as hard as you can give it to me."
"No," Teal'c said hoarsely,
trying to ease away. "I will harm
you."
Wrapping his legs around Teal'c's
waist, bracing himself against Jack, Daniel said, "If I thought there was
the slightest chance of that, I'd be sucking you off instead. God, I love your taste."
Jack hooked his hands around bulging
biceps to keep Teal'c from trying to escape.
"For crying out loud....
What's he going to have to do to convince you he wants fucked? Beg?"
"I will, if that's what you
want," Daniel said, surprised that he was practically purring the
words. He switched languages to his
lover's native one and added, "My lord, allow me to service you. Allow me the joy of being the vessel of your
seed." With a groan so deep that
it vibrated in *Daniel's* chest, Teal'c surrendered, cradling Daniel's backside
in his great hands and lifting it to align his erection with the opening at the
center.
"Wow," Jack murmured very
softly into Daniel's ear. "Remind
me to get you to teach me some Chulak dirty words."
Daniel started to laugh, but halfway
through the sound became a long, contented sigh as Teal'c slid into him. Though he wasn't sore yet from Jack's use,
he knew that he would be tomorrow, especially now, after accommodating Teal'c's
bulk. But it was satisfying, so
satisfying to answer the pump of his lover's hips, to watch the dark flesh flow
over and around and into him with Jack's filthy, arousing words punctuating the
ebb and flow of their love-making.
Quickly, very quickly, he was near to finishing again, lungs working
overtime to supply him with enough air to keep up with Teal'c's demanding pace.
Then Jack took Daniel's straining cock
in hand and began to jack it in time to Teal'c's thrusts, and that was all
Daniel could stand. Back arching until
only his shoulders were still in contact with Jack's body, he came, a shout
suffocating in his throat as all everything in him stopped for long, glorious
moment except for the fluid bubbling over the fist working his hard-on. As incredible as the pleasure was, it had to
fade, and as it did, Daniel melted back into Jack's arms, nearly boneless from
exhaustion and fulfillment.
For a few moments all he could do was
absorb the pounding Teal'c was giving him, relishing the simple joy of being
taken while being cradled so lovingly by Jack.
When he caught his breath, he deliberately tightened his ass as much as he
could, and murmured, **Thank you, my lord, for the gift of release. Never have I been so thoroughly and
well-used.**
Dark eyes opened, though to mere slits,
and Teal'c growled in the same language, **You think to hurry me to my own
finish? To spare your tender
opening? For now it is mine to fill.**
Choosing his words with care and making
sure his inner muscles were gripping tightly, Daniel said, **Only so that I may
rouse you again; our love waits for you to honor him with your cock.**
Automatically flicking a glance over
Daniel's shoulder to meet Jack's eyes, Teal'c growled again and impossibly
picked up the pace of their love-making.
Not even his massive strength could hold up to that kind of abuse for
very long; a moment later he plunged in as deeply as he could and stayed there,
roaring as he spilled his seed. It
seemed hot to Daniel; hotter than Jack's, though not as abundant, and he sighed
at the comforting heat soaked into the now-battered channel. Part of him wished that he could keep going,
but common sense was reporting in that certain parts of him were far too tender
now, and he didn't protest when Teal'c finally withdrew. His lover sank wearily onto the lower part
of the lounger, pillowing his head on Daniel's stomach, one hand lightly linked
with one of Jack's. He seemed to be
dozing off, and Daniel stretched minutely to get more comfortable, settling in
for the long haul.
"Definitely got to get you to
teach me some dirty words in his language," Jack said sleepily, nuzzling
at the side of Daniel's neck.
"Mmmm, not hard, really,"
Daniel said through a yawn, thinking that a short nap after so many restless
nights was called for. He started to
slip into slumber himself, and was far enough under that when a bright glow
began to hurt his eyes through the lids, he thought it was a dream. But the pain was real enough that he
instinctively turned from it, and the small shift in position was enough to jar
him completely awake.
Even as he blinked his confusion away,
the glow became brighter, and he squinted, turning toward the source. Singer's gift was lit up, the blues within
it swirling and tumbling so fast that it was vaguely sickening to watch. Alarmed that he had somehow damaged the toy
by not keeping it close enough to him, Daniel snatched up the glass sphere and
held it close, as if to warm it.
Then the glow changed, expanding out
and solidifying to form two familiar figures:
Singer and her parent, Lalt.
Startled, Daniel sat all the way up, unintentionally waking Teal'c, who
instinctively reached for a weapon that wasn't there. A split-second later, realizing what was happening, the Jaffa sat
up as well, grabbing a long-forgotten towel and dropping it over his and
Daniel's lap.
"What the..." Jack muttered
irritably, scooting toward Daniel to hide his nakedness behind him. "Singer, sweetheart, there's this Earth
custom you have to learn about called 'knocking.'"
Guessing from the fact that neither
alien changed expression, Daniel said quietly, "I don't think they're
really here."
As if to prove him correct, the image
wavered slightly, then Lalt said, "When Singer gave this tiny portion of
herself into your care, she didn't know that I could use it as a way to
communicate, though the power necessary to do so will destroy the fragment if I
am not extremely careful.
"But she was insistent that you
know our fate, and since you were instrumental in the outcome, I could hardly
argue with her." He looked down at
Singer, smiling at the top of her head, his expression shining with a love that
Daniel knew was real for all that the facial features had had to learn to show
the emotion.
"The Council was impressed that
she would run away in an attempt to protect me, but even moreso that she would
come back and insist on sharing my trial, no matter what the results. However, what truly made the difference in
their decision was that she had friends who would cherish and comfort her until
she calmed, the help her find the strength to do the right thing. Friendship is not lightly given among our
people, and for her to find such true friends at such a tender age is as
remarkable as her gift for controlling the small energies of organic life.
"She will be allowed to grow, more
carefully watched over, and her unique talent nourished, for she is the link we
have always sought to finally truly understand your form of
intelligence." He smiled, his tone
becoming wry and amused, "She will also be allowed to visit you, at
General Hammond discretion, of course, and with my *express* permission. All you need do is place her gift on the
surface of the active portal to extend the invitation."
Becoming very serious, he smoothed a
few loose curls away from Singer's shoulder, as if to give himself time to
choose his words. "We know about
your battle with the Ga'ould, but cannot help you, though it is impossible for
me to explain precisely why. You might
ask Singer to try; her child's eye may be able to see the difficulty in terms
she can express to you. Be that as it
may, she has not been forbidden to do what small things she can to help – a necessary
healing here, an irreplaceable thing repaired there." His tone became very
sharp. "I am trusting you not to
abuse the friendship she has given you."
With that the image faded to the
brilliant shine that had roused him, then to the warm glow of the glass
sphere's normal light - or what passed for normal for it now. Daniel stared down into it, his mind
tumbling as surely as the many shades of blue inside it. Long fingers closed over his, both sets
curling to hide the small toy, and he looked up to meet Jack's eyes.
"I'll work up a schedule with
Hammond as soon as we get back on duty," Jack said, his voice level, with
just a hint of command underneath. Then
he grinned at Teal'c. "Think
Master Bray'tec can stop by during one of them?"
Eyelids came down to shutter the
gratitude burning in Teal'c's eyes, but not before Daniel saw the depths of
it. But all the Jaffar said was,
"I believe that may be possible."
"Now that that's settled,"
Jack said definitely, "Let's take this inside. Why can't we make it to a nice warm bed, anyway? Could just nod right off afterwards instead
of disturbing a perfectly good afterglow with getting up and finding the bed we
should have been in to start with."
Daniel tuned out the familiar grousing,
a thought nibbling at the edge of his consciousness. Behind him Jack gave a nudge to get him going as Teal'c stood,
offering his hand to help him up, and that minor bit of team work was enough to
let the idea take a serious bite of his brain.
"Wait a minute," he said slowly, catching the hand being held
out to him. He opened his fingers so that Singer's gift was balanced in his
palm, and set two of Teal'c's fingers to one side of the globe. "Jack, you touch it, too."
"Why?" Jack asked,
automatically doing as told.
As soon as he touched the glass, Daniel
twisted his wrist, and the by now familiar mental burst from one of Singer's
'tastes' hit. This one was of him, Jack and Teal'c together, but it wasn't
simply a combination of the three of them with their individual traits standing
out, all of them complementing each other.
Instead they were a distinct unit that had its own music/feelings/images
that spoke of close harmony, interlocking needs and wants, shared smiles and
touches. There was a strength and
confidence in it that went beyond a physical body or one person's experiences;
there was also a power in it that could not be denied for all that it had no
definition or description that Daniel could produce despite his many languages.
As quickly as the 'taste' filled his
mind, it was gone, and Daniel had to fight to find oxygen as he reeled under
the effort of absorbing all that it meant.
"It's real to her," he breathed. "Love – it's as tangible and real as the warmth of a hand or
wind moving over skin."
"Wow!" Jack blurted, then he
reached around Daniel to steady Teal'c.
Their lover unsteadily knelt in front
of them, resting his head on Daniel's shoulder as he composed himself. "To see so clearly," Teal'c
murmured. "Advanced race,
indeed."
Jack rubbed a shaky hand over Teal'c's
shoulder, absently massaging as if to comfort both of them. "So that's what 'balanced' means. The first time she saw us she knew what took
us *years* to admit to."
Leaning back to put his weight in
Jack's care even as he hugged Teal'c closer to him, Daniel said quietly,
reverently, "Out of the mouths of babes."
*finis*