Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer. It's sappy, but that's okay. It's only sappy in a Fraser kind of way. Please send comments, questions, compliments, and otters to sdelcul@yahoo.com.

Author's Notes: [09/19/07]

At first I was hurt, and although I am loathe to admit it perhaps a little angry as well, that I had been abandoned again. The sentiment is childish, but I clung to the now former Ray Vecchio as a drowning man clings to a rope tossed from shore. That is not to say Ray was not a good friend and partner, but a large part of the attraction was that he had been there while you had not.

As we were packing to return to the states, Ray said something that helped me to understand my feelings. He said he was proud of me.

When I asked why, he said, "because I know how hard it was for you to let him go, but you did it because it was what needed doing."

When I tried to say that I didn't know what he was referring to, he looked at me for a moment, and then said, "it's time to get your man, Fraser." And then he left the room.

It was only then that I began to consider my actions and responses since you had left a year earlier. I had taken your actions as abandonment, but rather than acknowledging that and moving forward, I let those feelings affect my behavior. After much thought, I made a decision.

The decision itself was uncomplicated; the followthrough was perhaps more difficult. I considered going to find you in Florida, or letting you come find me in Canada (amazingly I was sure that you would), but in the end I decided to return to Chicago, where everything began.

Like a magnet, you were there before I actually arrived, meeting me at the airport with a smile and a renewed wolf liscence for Diefenbaker.

I missed you, Ray. You have no idea how much. I sometimes think that I was losing my mind those months you were gone, and I'm not sure how no one noticed. Now it's my turn to tell you a few things, Ray."

"I love you."