Disclaimer:

Author's Notes: Credit where it's due: Thanks to LaT's 'Infinite' for making me think of RayK and Fraser in an otherworldly sense. Thanks to Resonant for 'A Fine and Private Place' which burned a beautiful picture in my brain. Thanks to Laurell K. Hamilton and her series of Anita Blake novels for bringing to me a picture of vamps and Pack and how they might work together.

Story Notes: Post-CotW Fic without The Stella or Florida.
Previously available on DueSlash.

I asked him to meet me after his shift at the Consulate. Just him and me. No Kowalski, no wolf. Just the two of us. I had some things I needed to tell him now that I was back in Chicago. Why we couldn't be partners. Why I'd gotten a PI's license instead of going back to the 27th. Why Chicago hasn't really felt like home since I got back.

I pull up to the Consulate in the newest version of the Riv. I can't believe that they'd been able to find another one. This had to be Riv number four for me since I'd met Benny. Of course, the last one wasn't my fault.

Winter closes in around me while I wait. A light snow begins to fall and melt on the windshield. I'd missed the snow while I was undercover. Don't really get snow in Las Vegas. Gotta go to Tahoe for it and I don't ski.

Constable Benton Fraser, RCMP, emerges from the Consulate right on time, which is surprising considering he's changed out of his serge and poofy pants. In fact, I'm surprised to see Levi's and a sweater that both look like they've seen better days. But Benny being Benny, he still manages to look neat and tidy.

He gets into the car and sits in the passenger's seat.

"Thanks for meeting me, Benny. I appreciate it."

"Of course, Ray. What is it that you wanted to talk about?"

"Let's go somewhere a little private, huh?"

"Whatever you want. I just need to be somewhere later tonight. Do you suppose we could talk there?"

"As long as it's private. Where did you have in mind?"

"The state park just south of the city. Will that be all right?"

"That'll work just fine, Benny. Just fine." I think I see the glimmer of something in his gaze, but shrug it off and drive, pointing the Riv due south.

We arrive at the park and I pull into the lot farthest from the entrance.

"Let's take a walk, huh, Fraser?"

He just nods and exits the car, waiting for me. We head off towards a wooded area. I want the cover it would give us from possible prying eyes.

"What is it you wanted to talk about, Ray?

I shove my hands in my coat pockets out of habit more than from the cold. "Well, Benny, I'm not quite sure how to start. It's like nothing I've ever told anyone."

"Perhaps it would be easiest if you just said it quickly. Don't worry about what I might think. You may be surprised at how much I can take."

I nod, agreeing with him. I can't help but feel like he knows what I'm going to tell him. Or that he's hiding something of his own.

"Benny, something happened to me while I was in Vegas. I'm not the same person I was when I left Chicago two years ago."

"I've noticed. You're stronger, more self-assured. More of a night-owl than you ever were."

The last observation feels like a challenge. Like he's waiting, waiting for me to figure out if he knows or not. I'm starting to feel an energy leak from him, familiar but still strange. Like mine but at the same time very different.

"Ray, now is not the time to prevaricate. I apologize for my impatience, but my time is very limited this evening. I have an appointment."

"With Kowalski?" I know I'm right. I can see Ray K. and the wolf in his mind. Why couldn't I see in before this? How could he be strong enough to block that part of me?

"Yes, as a matter of fact. And Diefenbaker."

I feel jealousy flare hot in my chest. It's been a while since I've felt anything there. "Well then. I guess I'd better spill."

Benny drops his head, like he needs to avoid looking me in the eye. I don't feel nervousness or doubt from him. Just restriction, control. Amazing self-control.

"I know this is uncomfortable for you, Ray. It's taken quite an adjustment for you, I can tell. The life of a vampire is not easily adapted to."

I gaped at him. "How did you know?"

He looked at me and his eyes glowed yellow. That sort of familiar energy passes over me in waves for a few seconds and then he has it under control again.

"Benny?" When will I ever be able to trust my instincts? He knew and he's hiding something.

"I, too, have undergone changes in the last two years. I've found my pack, Ray."

I watch as his nostrils flare. He smells something. I turn my face to the wind and inhale. I understand. "Dief. And Kowalski. They're tracking you. Coming to find you. Because the moon is full."

"My beast is strong tonight, Ray."

The waves of energy, of power, hit me continuously now, but I can handle it. I let a little of my own loose and see him flinch from the icy touch of it.

"I can feel it now, Benny. You hide it well. When did it happen?"

"I was injured in an investigation. It tore Ray up inside that he might lose me. We confessed our feelings for each other. Then he confessed something about himself. Confessed to me that he wanted to form a pack with me, and that he understood what that meant to me. But that he would have to hurt me to do so and he wasn't sure if he could do that. The next full moon, I found out exactly what he meant. It's amazing how such a wild thing can be so tender when he wants to be.

"I watched him change right in front of my eyes. Watched as his shape shifted and stretched. He nuzzled my hand and looked up at me. Those same eyes, but in a radically different body. And I fully understood our bond for the first time."

I could see the memory floating in his head. He was letting me see. Kowalski morphing into a huge gray wolf, looking into Fraser's eyes and asking permission. Fraser ruffled the scruff of his neck and nodded, saying "I belong to you. You're my mate."

The gray wolf sunk his teeth into Fraser's thigh, Fraser biting back the cry of pain. The bite drew blood. The wolf's muzzle was streaked with it when he drew back from the bite. He licked the wound clean and whimpered, as if he was sorry for having to cause pain. But they would be together forever now.

"The next full moon, he stayed with me while I changed. I was terrified at first, but over the last 18 months, I've learned to relax into it. It's a joyous sensation to be so free.

"Despite the fact that Ray is responsible for my change, I took my place as Alpha of the pack. It doesn't sit will with any of us, though. We are too egalitarian minded to truly be Alpha."

"Are you saying you're looking for an Alpha? Looking for a fourth for your Pack?"

"I didn't think so until tonight. I only knew something was still unsettled. Ray and Dief knew it, too."

I can see him struggling now, fighting to keep control of his beast so we can finish this.

"Ray, is it true that you can call wolves? That, as a vampire, the wolf is your animal?"

"Not all wolves, Benny. Only those that pledge their service to me. I have to make a deal before I can call any animal. And that shape shifting thing is a myth so far as I can tell."

"Ah." Fraser's upper lip curled and he let a growl that was entirely non-human escape his throat. "We'll have to continue this later, Ray. I can't hold off my beast any longer."

"Let it go, Benny. I'll be here."

I watch him as he must have watched Kowalski those months ago. Watch his body transform in front of my eyes into a gigantic Arctic Wolf. When he looks up at me, I can see Benny in that furry face. He licks my hand, tasting the salt from the feeding I'd had before I picked him up.

He whimpers once, then turns his muzzle toward the south, where his pack waits. He looks at me again, then gestures with his snout toward the others.

*"Come, Ray. Come home with me, with us."* I hear it in my mind. *"Call us, and we'll answer. I love you."*

I follow him, so beautiful in the moonlight. For the first time, I don't feel clumsy or like I can't keep up with him. I let myself lift off the ground, skimming over his trail as I follow. So free. So right.

In a small clearing I find them, an Arctic Wolf, a Grey Wolf, and a donut-stealing half-Wolf, all waiting. For me.

"I love you, too, Benny." I knOw Kowalski and I will be able to resolve our differences. The love we both have for Fraser will be enough. More than enough.

I tip my head back, opening for the unearthly howl that's clawing at my throat. I never knew I was capable of such sound before. But they're pulling it from me. Their presence calls to something deep inside me.

Moments later my voice is joined by three others. And I know I'm home.

The End
Copyright November 2001 by JennyB.

End Chicago Midnight by JennyB.: buehler67@yahoo.com

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