Author's webpage: http://victoria.tc.ca/~wy236/fic.html
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Easter Surprise
Benton Fraser took a good look at his life partner. Ray looked troubled. Ben wondered if he should say something, or just leave Ray alone. He decided that communication was usually a good thing, and spoke.
"Is something troubling you, Ray?" he asked.
"Easter," answered Ray.
"What about Easter?" Fraser queried.
Ray sighed. "Usually my family goes to Mass together at Easter. Then Ma cooks a big dinner. You remember, you came over last year. It's a big traditional family thing. You and me aren't exactly a traditional family."
"Traditional or not, we are family, though, Ray."
Ray smiled a bit sadly. "Yeah, Benny, I know. But I'm not sure what to do about Easter. I don't know if I'd be welcome at church or at home - er, at my Ma's house."
Ben noticed Ray's use of the word 'home', though he'd tried to cover it up. He knew that Ray still thought of his family's house as his home, though he and Fraser had been living together since Christmas, after Ray's mother had asked him to leave home when she'd found out about their relationship.
"You have been getting along fairly well with your mother since ... since you were injured," Fraser pointed out. Ray had suffered a serious gunshot wound in mid-January and the crisis had brought his family closer together.
"Ma's been here to visit us a couple of times, Benny, that's all. Notice she hasn't invited us to the house. I'm afraid that any Easter invitation would come with strings attached - like leaving you behind. I won't do that."
"Ray, if you want to spend time with your family, I don't mind. " Benny wanted Ray to get along with his family, and if that meant Ray making visits to them alone, he would aceept that.
"But you *should* mind, Benny!" Ray exclaimed. "You're my partner - in all things. You're my family just as much as they are. I chose you, Benny. I'm not going to reject you just to make them happy."
Fraser sighed. "Look, Ray, we may be jumping the gun here. We may not hear from your family at all. The Chicago Dignity chapter is having a special Easter mass. We could attend that and not have to worry about being rejected by the church." Dignity was an organization for gay Roman Catholics.
"I know about the Dignity mass, Benny. You know I've been to Dignity a few times here and there. It's nice, it's better than no church at all. But I want to be able to go to Mass with my family - including you - and be accepted. I want there to be a place where we can go and it doesn't matter if we're gay or straight because we're all there for the same reason - to worship God."
"That may happen one day, Ray. But for now we have to choose - do we go to Mass at all? Do we go to the Dignity mass? Do we go to a regular Mass and stay closeted?"
Ray groaned. "I don't know, Benny," he said sadly.
Fraser put his arms around his lover. "We don't have to decide right away. Easter isn't for another few weeks. Think about it for awhile and let me know what you want to do. I'll go along with whatever you decide."
"But, Benny, what about what you want?" asked Ray.
"All I want is for you to be happy, Ray. You know that I'm not particularly religious. Your faith is important to you, and I respect that. I have no preferences regarding how we spend Easter, except for wanting us to be together. And if you want to spend it with your family and they don't want me there, I can live with that."
"Benny, we've already been over this. I'm not having you be a martyr on my account. Easter and every other holiday, we're together. Always. Got that?"
"Yes, Ray."
"Good."
A few days later, the two of them received a phone call from Mrs. Vecchio. She wanted them - *both* of them - to come to dinner on Easter Sunday. She hinted that she would like Ray to attend church with the family, but left that up to him to decide, though she was not subtle about what her preference would be.
Ray was pleased. "I think she's finally beginning to accept us, Benny," he said happily.
"It does sound that way. Have you decided about Mass?"
"I want us to go with Ma , Benny. No matter what the church has said about people like us .... I grew up in this parish, in that church. I have a right to worship there. And I'd like it if you were there by my side."
"I'm by your side in all things, Ray. You know that."
"I do know that, Benny. Thank you. I love you, you know that?"
Fraser smiled and kissed Ray. "I do, and I love you too."
Easter morning dawned bright and clear. Ray fussed nervously with his suit. Fraser finally took over tying Ray's tie for him.
"Why are you nervous, love?" Benny asked.
"Because we're going to spend the day with my family, Benny - for the first time since we came out at Christmas."
"But we have spent time with your family since then. Your mother has been to visit, and Francesca and Maria both came to visit you in the hospital."
"That's not what I mean. I mean we're going to be with the whole family. And we're going to Mass, and...it's just a big deal."
Fraser finished with Ray's tie and took his partner in his arms. "I understand. Your family is important to me too, Ray. Listen, if things don't go well, just say the word and we can leave."
"I hope it won't come to that," Ray sighed.
"I hope so, too, but it helps to be prepared," replied Ben. The two men kissed before moving apart to finish getting ready.
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As Ray and Ben walked up to the church, Ray reached for his lover's hand. Suprised but pleased, Ben took it, and they walked hand in hand to the Vecchio family pew. Mama Vecchio frowned but didn't say anything. The two men had already decided they weren't going to stay in the closet, but were not going to "flaunt" their relationship either. They were simply going to act the way they always acted, which meant doing 'couple' things. They shared a hymnal. They held each other's hands. When the priest told the congregation to exchange signs of peace with each other, they hugged, but didn't kiss. Ben did give Mama Vecchio a kiss on the cheek, which made her smile for the first time since Ray and Benny had arrived.
When the time came for Holy Communion, Ray and Fraser walked up to the altar together and knelt. The priest ignored them and went on to the next person in line. Ray fumed inwardly but Benny put a hand on his arm and he decided not to make a scene in church.
They returned to their seat, still holding hands. One of the ushers approached them and leaned over to speak to them. "Excuse me," he said softly, "but Father Flaherty has asked me tell you not to hold hands. You are flaunting your sinful lifestyle in Our Father's house."
Ray replied softly but very firmly. "Our *lifestyle* is none of Father Flaherty's business, or yours. As for this being God's house, if God has a problem with me and Benny holding hands, he can strike us with lightning or something."
The usher moved away, turning an unattractive shade of red.
After the service was over, Ray and Benny moved quickly out of the church and into the Riviera. "Ma is going to be pissed at me," Ray stated.
"That usher was rather rude to us, Ray. Perhaps she will be angry at him, not at you."
"I doubt it," replied Ray. "Let's go for a drive, Benny. I need to cool off before we go to Ma's dinner."
They ended up on the shore of Lake Michigan. "D'you remember this place, Benny?" Ray asked.
"It does look familiar. I'm not certain, however."
"This is where you pulled me out of the trunk of the car I was locked in, underwater, when we were working on that stolen car case. "
"Now I remember. Seeing it in daylight is different than seeing it at night. And I was rather distracted at the time. I was afraid I had lost you." He paled slightly at the memory.
Unfastening his seatbelt, Ray took Benny into his arms. "But you didn't lose me. You saved me. That time and so many other times. You saved my life, Benny. In more ways than one. Before you came - hell, before you came I had no life! I was burned out and washed up. Then you came along, and you cared. You cared about justice, you cared about doing the right thing, you cared about the people behind the case files. And you got me to care, too. And I love you for it."
"You've done just as much for me, Ray," replied Fraser. "And I love you too."
After a brief but intense makeout session, the two men separated reluctantly. "I like this a lot, Benny, but we do have a dinner invitation," Ray pointed out. They straightened their clothes and headed to Ray's mother's house.
They sat in the driveway for a few minutes while Ray tried to take a few deep breaths and calm himself. "Do I look okay, Benny?" he asked.
Fraser smiled. "You always look wonderful to me, Ray."
Ray smacked him on the shoulder. "I should know better than to ask you."
As they walked into the house, Ray looked around. Not much had changed in the four months since he had last been here. Ma, Frannie and Maria were in the kitchen. Tony was in the living room drinking a beer and trying to keep an eye on his children and stop them from ruining their good clothes. "Hello Ray, Fraser," he said. "Sit down, take a load off. How've you been? "
The men made small talk for awhile, then one of his nephews approached Ray. "Uncle Ray, can I ask you something?" inquired the boy.
"Sure, Joey, what is it?"
"Well after church today, one of the other kids from my Sunday School said that you and Uncle Benny are going to go to hell, 'cause you're gay. Are you going to hell, Uncle Ray?"
Tony tried to shoo his son away but Ray stopped him. "Let me answer his question," he said. He turned to Joey. "Joey, I don't know for certain if I'm going to heaven or hell when I die. I certainly hope I'm not going to hell. I think that God is the only one who knows for sure. Father Flaherty doesn't know, your friend from Sunday School doesn't know. Only God knows. But I don't think that loving Uncle Benny is going to make God send me to hell. The Bible says we're supposed to love one another, right?"
"Yes, it does say that," answered Joey.
"Do you think that loving someone is a bad thing, Joey?" asked Ray.
"No, I don't think so."
"Well then, there's your answer. Do you feel better now?"
Joey smiled. "Yeah, Uncle Ray. I do." And he ran off to play again.
Soon Mrs. Vecchio called everyone in for dinner. She asked Ray to say Grace. Surprised, he did so, thanking God for the food, and for his family.
The food was, as usual, superb, and Ray and Ben were able to relax and enjoy the meal. Afterwards they shooed Ray's Ma out of the kitchen and insisted on doing the dishes. When Mrs. Vecchio tried to protest, Ray said, "Ma, you worked hard getting this dinner ready. You shouldn't have to clean up, too. Benny an' me want to do this for you. Eventually, she agreed.
When it was finally timeto leave, Mrs. Vecchio went to the door with Ray and Fraser. "Thank you for coming. Thank you *both* for coming," she emphasised.
"Thank you for the invitation, Ma," said Ray.
"Yes, thank you," Ben added.
Mrs. Vecchio hugged the both of them and the two lovers departed, happy and full.
When they got home, Ray turned to Fraser and said, "I have something for you, Benny. An Easter surprise."
"A surprise, Ray? I didn't think that Easter was usually a gift-giving occasion."
Ray grinned. "When I was a kid, my Ma used to hide treats around the house for us to find after we came home from Mass on Easter Sunday. She said the Easter Bunny brought them." He handed Ben a plastic egg.
Fraser opened the egg, and found a ring inside. "What is this for?" he asked.
Ray knelt in front of his lover. "Benny, I've been thinking a lot about family lately, and about tradition. And I realized, as if I didn't know this before, that you are my family. Even though Ma and Frannie and Maria and the kids are important, you are the most important person in my life. And maybe we're not traditional, but I want to do something traditional. Guess I'm a traditional kind of guy." He cleared his throat. "Benny, will you marry me?"
"But Ray, how can two men get married? Where would we have a wedding? Who would marry us?" Fraser realized he was babbling and shut up.
"Benny, we'll figure out the details later, that is if you want to marry me - please, tell me that you do!"
Ben pulled Ray into a fierce embrace. "Yes, Ray, I do want to marry you."
Ray sighed contentedly. "Good. Father Behan - he's been doing the Dignity masses I told you I've gone to - he said he'd marry us. I asked him already."
"You must have been pretty certain of my answer,then," Fraser said with a smile.
"Not certain. Just hopeful. I love you, Benny."
"And I love you, Ray." He stood up and extended his hand. "Is it bad luck to consummate a marriage before the actual wedding?" he asked.
"I highly doubt that, Benny." And they walked into the bedroom and shut the door.
END
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