All Due South characters belong to Alliance. I'd like to thank Rowan for her very thorough and patient Beta services, and for being so gracious about the changes I didn't make. And thanks to Katapult for her constant encouragement and invaluable suggestions. This story is for my good friend, Linda Hughes.

 

Feedback is always nice BiermannR@home.com

 

Synergy

by Ruthie Biermann

 

 

"Don't look at me that way, Fraser, I did what I had to do."

 

"You mean you did what you wanted to do. You didn't have to apprehend Sanders by yourself. And you certainly didn't have to lie to me about it." He leans forward in his chair. I lean forward in mine.

"I didn't lie, Fraser."

 

"Yes you did, Ray."

 

"Didn't."

 

He takes a deep breath. "You told me you had to run an errand, I believe you said it was to the bank," he says.

 

"Yeah, so, bank, bar, they both start with b's. No big deal." I'm trying to shrug this off like it was nothing, but Fraser is persisting, as usual.

 

"That happens to be a lie, Ray."

 

"It's a white lie, okay? A white lie ain't a lie." Now I'm getting annoyed.

 

"Ray, a lie is a lie, white or otherwise. Why did you respond to that call alone, and why did you lie to me about it?"

 

I don't wanna talk about this. "Drop it, Fraser." I'm squinting at him, giving him a warning look.

 

"No, Ray."

 

I shake my head and lean back in my chair. He wants me to tell him why. I can't talk about this...not here anyway. Don't need everybody at the precinct knowing my business. I look up at Fraser and he's waiting for an answer. How can I tell him that I was too scared to take him on that call to pick up Sanders; that I was scared he'd get hurt...killed. Six years ago that sleaze Sanders and his scumbag pal, Townsend, shot my partner when I worked at the 1-6. They didn't have to shoot him...Tommy didn't even have his gun out for chrissakes. And then he was dying; he was dying and I promised him, I swore to him I'd get those assholes, and I did too. But then they escaped last week and that promise still stood. So when my snitch called today that he spotted Sanders, I couldn't risk Fraser's life too. I couldn't. Fraser doesn't even carry a gun, but these creeps wouldn't think twice about shooting him in cold blood...like they did Tommy. I probably should've told Fraser the truth, but he still would've insisted on going, and it's just too hard for me to talk about anyway. So, he's sitting here, waiting for me to explain to him why I went out alone. I can't...not now anyway.

 

"Fraser, Sanders is safely tucked away. It's over. Let's move on."

 

"Ray..."

 

"No. What is it with you anyway, why can't you leave things alone?" I don't give him a chance to answer. "Look, Fraser, I got too much work to do now, so if you don't mind." I gesture to the door. He stands up and I can see he's not happy with me.

 

"Fine, Ray." He motions to Dief. "I'll see you tomorrow, then." And he turns and walks out.

So, now Fraser's pissed at me. I been thinking about it all afternoon. It's not like I go out on calls by myself all the time. And Fraser's done it himself, so why the hell can't he let it go? At least he didn't tell Welsh. Lieu would've had a fit if he knew I went out to pick up Sanders without my partner or backup.

 

Okay, I guess I better go to the Consulate and try to make nice with Fraser. I ain't apologizing...I'm just gonna try to explain it to him so he won't be pissed anymore. But I think I'd rather listen to him tell a week's worth of Inuit stories.

 

***************

 

It's six o'clock and I'm on my way to the Consulate to talk to Fraser. He doesn't know I'm coming. I wasn't sure I should call, but I didn't want to take the chance that he'd tell me not to come. This traffic sucks...move your ass, buddy...at this rate, I'll never get to the Consulate.

 

Okay, so, I was wrong. It's 6:20 and I pull up in front of the building. I see the Ice Queen walking in the opposite direction, looking like she's in a hurry. Maybe she's late for one of her sensitivity training classes.

 

It's now or never, Kowalski. I knock on the door and wait. Nothing. Knock again. C'mon Frase, open up. The sooner you open the door the sooner I can get this over with. Just about to knock again when the door swings open. Fraser's standing there in his ironed jeans and ironed shirt and ironed hair. He doesn't look happy to see me.

 

"Hey, Frase. We need to talk."

 

"Yes, Ray, I suppose we do." He just stands there. I see Dief standing behind him, and he looks sorta scared. Oh great. So the Mountie's been terrorizing the wolf; he must still be mad.

 

"So, can I come in?" I ask him, in a nice way.

 

"Yes, of course," he says. He stands back and opens the door wider so I can come in. Dief walks over to me and I pet him. He's looking up at me and I could swear he's telling me to run.

 

Okay, Dief. You should know. So I turn back towards the door and smash right into Fraser. My forehead bangs into his left eye. Oh man, I think I hurt him...I must've 'cause my forehead feels like I hit a brick wall. Damn it. I'm holding my forehead and he's holding his left eye and he's looking at me with his right eye like I just attacked him.

 

"Fraser, I'm sorry. I didn't know you were standing there."

 

He's still holding his eye. "That's...that's quite all right, Ray." He moves his hand away, and there's already a red mark there. Shit.

 

I move my hand away and he's looking at my forehead. "Looks like you're going to have a bruise there, he says." Now I don't feel so bad about his eye.

 

"Yeah, you too, Fraser. Sorry." He just nods at me.

 

"I was about to feed Diefenbaker. We can talk in the kitchen," he says and he walks past me to go to the kitchen. He didn't even ask me if he could take my jacket. I think he's even madder now than he was before. Probably had time to think about it and found even more reasons to be pissed at me. Like why I drink so much coffee. Maybe I should just shoot myself now.

 

I follow him to the kitchen. Dief's walking behind us real slow, which I take as a bad sign. I take off my jacket and sit down while he gets Dief his food. Nobody's saying anything. I guess I should start 'cause I'm the one who came to talk to him.

 

"Fraser...um...Fraser I...uh.... You wanna tell me why you got this bug up your ass?" Oh shit. That just slipped out. Before I can fix it, he's on me.

 

"Very nice, Ray. That's what you consider talking? If you're going to take that attitude, then perhaps you should leave right now." Oh yeah, he's royally pissed now. I take a deep breath.

 

"Okay, sorry, Fraser, that just slipped out. It's just that...I don't understand why you're so mad. I mean, it's not like you haven't gone out on calls without me...did you ever see me getting pissed at you...uh, well, scratch that...okay, so I been a little steamed sometimes, but you were a pain in the ass in the squad room."

 

His eyes are real narrow now. I don't want to look at him, but I don't want him to know that he's rattling my cage, which he is. Big time. I gotta look cool. He puts the food down for Dief and walks over to me. If I was standing, I'd be backing up.

 

"First of all Ray, you lied to me...you told me you were going to the bank. Second, you went out alone to pick up an escaped prisoner who is known to have made several threats on your life."

 

I knew the white lie was really bothering him. So I give him that one.

 

"Okay, Fraser, I'm sorry I lied to you. I shouldn't 've done that."

 

He looks surprised that I apologized. I'm a little surprised myself.

 

"What about the fact that you went out on that call alone to pick up a sociopath who's threatened to kill you?" he asks.

 

Yeah so?"

 

"He said he would cut your heart out, Ray."

 

"They all say that, Fraser." No way he's gonna buy that.

 

"No, Ray, they don't all say that...you know very well they don't all say that. This man was convicted of committing seven murders, Ray, two of them police officers." I knew he wouldn't buy it.

 

"Fraser, you're overreacting." He is.

 

"If I behaved in such a foolhardy fashion, you know you would never let it rest," he says.

 

He's got a point. But...I got a better one. "You're out of your jurisdiction, Fraser. You're not allowed to carry a gun...if you went out on a call like that alone, I'd have a reason to go ballistic on you. You don't have a reason."

 

He's opening his eyes real wide now. Can't help noticing that the left one is already turning purple. Oh shit. What did I say?

 

"You could've been walking into a trap, Ray. Into a trap set by a man who wants to see you dead. Did that possibility ever enter your mind?"

 

"Fraser, Max gave me the tip. He's one of my best snitches. I trust him." I do. Never would've gone if I didn't.

 

"Did you ever stop to think, Ray, that maybe Max could've been forced to call you against his will?" He's staring at me. The Mountie is staring at me with a purple eye.

 

"No." Got nothing else to add to that, even if it did occur to me what he just said.

 

Now he looks even more pissed if that's possible. Jeez, I'm just making things worse. I glance over to Dief and he ain't eating anymore. He's looking at me and Fraser, and I swear he's staring at us like we both got two heads.

 

"That was a reckless thing to do, Ray, not worthy of your abilities as a good police officer."

 

Okay, so now he's insulting me and saying I'm a good cop at the same time?

 

"Yeah, Fraser, I am a good cop, and I wasn't being reckless." I'm glaring at him, just short of showing my teeth, but he ain't backing down.

 

"Ray, listen to me. You receive a call from one of your informants about an escaped convict who kills people for recreation, and has threatened to kill you. Then you run out without even stopping to consider that perhaps your informant was being compromised into making that call. Does that not sound reckless or, at the very least, careless to you?"

 

He's waiting for an answer. I hate to say it, but he does have a point. But I know Max, and I know the call was legit. So that's what I say.

 

"I know Max, and I knew the call was legit. So I went out, I collared Sanders and I put him back in prison where he belongs. End of story. Get over it, Fraser."

 

As usual, the wrong thing to say. "Get over it?" He takes a deep breath. "No, Ray, I won't get over it. Look, we're not getting anywhere with this discussion. It's obvious you're going to continue to do whatever you want with no regard for your personal safety, and I won't be a part of it."

 

He's scaring me. "So what'cha saying, Fraser?"

 

He says real slow, I guess so I'll get it the first time. "What I'm saying is, perhaps we should no longer be partners." He's staring at me. And I'm staring back at him hoping he didn't say what I thought he just said.

 

"No, Fraser."

 

"No? No, what, Ray?"

 

"Listen, Fraser. You know I don't do this all the time. But I thought if we both showed up at that bar, we would've been made the second we walked in....I mean, you don't exactly look like the kinda guy who hangs out at a joint like that."

 

Okay, so I just told him the absolute truth. So maybe now he will get over it. I think about Tommy again. I know I should be telling Fraser everything, but I'm not comfortable bringing up Tommy now. I don't want to talk about my old partner dying while I'm pissed at Fraser. Hell, I'm not even sure I can talk about it at all.

 

"I didn't have to go into the bar with you, Ray. I could have remained outside and acted as your cover. Why is it so hard for you to admit you were wrong?"

 

"I wasn't wrong." I'm yelling now. "And how the hell could you cover me without a gun?"

 

"I've done it before, Ray," he says real quiet.

 

"Yeah, and you've almost gotten us killed before, too," I say, trying to pull back the words as I'm saying them.

 

Oh jeez, he looks like I just punched him in the other eye. Kowalski, you are a jerk.

 

"Fraser, I...uh, I didn't mean...."

 

He interrupts me. "So it seems you do agree with me, Ray; to continue this partnership may very well be a mistake. I wouldn't want to be responsible for endangering your life any more than it is already."

 

"Fraser...."

 

"Ray, I'm tired. You're tired. This conversation is moving in a direction I didn't anticipate. Perhaps we should just say good night." He backs up and walks towards the door, I guess waiting for me to stand. So I do. I follow him out of the kitchen, and he stops to look at me.

 

"Um, okay, Fraser. I'll let myself out." I look over at Dief. He's standing in the kitchen doorway with his mouth open asking me what the hell just happened.

 

If I knew, I'd tell you, Dief.

 

Fraser just nods. "Good night, Ray." And he disappears down the hall.

 

This is bad. This is really bad. No way I wanted this to happen. Kowalski, you're stubborn and you're stupid. I'm gonna have to tell him what happened with Tommy and Sanders. But it's just so hard. I close my eyes and I see Tommy lying in my arms again, bleeding...dying. I shake my head hard to get the picture outta my mind.

 

Taking a deep breath I head to Fraser's office. I'm thinking about what we both said. Fraser was right about one thing, he's always covered me without a gun and he's saved my ass more than a few times. But going out alone on this call today wasn't wrong. I still believe that...I had to protect Fraser. Shit, even if I do tell him the truth, he'll still say I was wrong. I hate this.

 

I'm at Fraser's office door and I go to knock, but something holds me back. Don't know what it is, maybe I just don't want to admit I'm wrong when I don't think I am. Maybe I'm not ready to talk about it. Or maybe I'm thinking Fraser just needs time to cool off a little. Yeah, and me too. I guess it's a combination of all of 'em.

 

I decide to leave. I'll call Fraser tomorrow...give us both time to think He couldn't've been serious about that partner thing; I'll just have to convince him he wasn't. I stop at the Consulate door and look back down the hall. Dief's standing there watching me looking real sad. This ain't good-bye, Dief, I'll be back, I hope. I open the front door and lock it behind me.

 

********************

 

It's ten o'clock the next morning. I didn't sleep all night courtesy of one Mountie with a purple, uh, make that a black eye. Fraser's standing in front of my desk. Seeing him with that eye makes me feel even worse. And I feel pretty bad already with no sleep, plus I got a big bump in the middle of my forehead. I look up at him and he's standing there staring at me with his Stetson in his hands, almost looks like he's gonna apologize. Oh yeah, that bump on my head is making me delusional. Dief is nudging my hand now, so I give him a few scratches behind the ear, but my eyes are on Fraser. He starts to speak.

 

"Ray, I'm not happy with how our conversation went last night." I'm watching him while he's talking...looks like he didn't get much sleep either.

 

"Yeah, I know, Frase. Maybe we should go someplace private to work this out." He smiles at me, well sorta.

 

I hear Welsh's door open. "Detective Vecchio, in my office now...you too, Constable."

 

Oh jeez, Welsh's timing can really suck. Fraser and I look at each other and we both walk into Welsh's office. Fraser closes the door. The lieutenant looks up at me and he's not happy. I do not need this today.

 

"Detective, what happened to your head?" He's eyeing my forehead.

 

"Uh, well, sir, I uh...walked into a door."

 

He's narrowing his eyes at me and he's shaking his head. "Yesterday, detective, you went out on a call alone to pick up Sanders."

 

I can't believe this. I can't believe Fraser told him.

 

"Uh, yes, sir, but I collared him, no problem."

 

"The end does not justify the means, Detective. How many times have I told you not to go out on a call of this nature without your partner or without backup?"

 

"I just thought it would be better...."

 

"I don't care what you thought, Vecchio. You disobeyed an order and in the process, you could've gotten yourself killed. Now, you may not place much value on your own life, but as your commanding officer, I'm responsible for your skinny ass. I can't have you disobeying orders and placing your life in unnecessary danger. And you know how I hate filling out those forms."

 

I look over at Fraser. He's looking at Welsh. Now I'm really pissed. That's no way to treat your partner.

 

"Detective."

 

"Uh, yeah, sir, it won't happen again."

 

"You bet it won't, Vecchio. And if it does, I'll suspend you for a week. You got that?"

 

"Yes sir."

 

"Any word on Townsend?" he asks me. Doesn't sound as mad when he asks me that.

 

"No, nothing yet, Lieu," I say.

 

"Okay, but make sure you keep me apprised. Now get outta here." He's looking at Fraser. "What happened to your eye, Constable?"

 

"Well, sir...."

 

"Don't tell me, you walked into the same door Vecchio did."

 

"Uh, well...." My eyes are on the floor. He better not tell him...he already told him enough. Damn that Mountie. If there was a group for compulsive truth tellers, he'd be their number one member. "Yes, sir," Fraser says.

 

Score one for the Mountie.

 

We leave Welsh's office. I can't believe Fraser. How could he tell Welsh? Now I wanna blacken his other eye. I can't hold it in. "How could you do that, Fraser? How could you tell him?" I'm trying to keep my voice low.

 

He looks at me and his eyes are as big as saucers, well, one of them is anyway. "Ray, you think I told him?" He really looks surprised.

 

"You mean you didn't?"

 

"No, Ray. I wouldn't do that." He looks hurt. I feel like shit now.

 

"Well, who did?" I look around the bullpen. Damn it. There's Dewey smiling at me.

 

"I have no ide...."

 

Before Fraser can get the words out, I'm across the bullpen in Dewey's face. I grab his collar. "You got a big mouth, Dewey." I want to punch him in the face, but before I get a chance, Fraser's grabbing my arm and pulling me back.

 

"Ray...Ray...."

 

Dewey's yelling at me to get the hell off him. Fraser's dragging me back to my desk. I yell across the room at Dewey. "You stay outta my business, Dewey." He's smiling at me again. I yank my arm away from Fraser, but he keeps holding on. I finally turn my back on that back stabber and head to my desk.

 

"Forget it, Fraser." I grab my jacket and head to the door. "I'm getting some lunch," I say. Fraser and Dief are right next to me.

 

"Ray, it's 10:15 in the morning."

 

"My stomach doesn't care what time it is, Fraser. I'm hungry now."

 

"Well, perhaps I can accompany you so we can discuss this further." This day just keeps getting better 'n better.

 

"Yeah, okay, Fraser, whatever." We leave the squad room and head to the parking lot.

 

********************

 

We're in the car and nobody's saying anything. I'm still thinking about Dewey, that loudmouth...he missed his calling; he should've been a snitch. I glance over to Fraser and he's looking out the passenger window. I feel bad for suspecting him of telling Welsh; I really should know better.

 

"Um, Frase, sorry I accused you of talking to Welsh."

 

He looks over to me. "Well, to be honest, Ray, that just further illustrates the point I was making last night."

 

"What point?" I ask. What the hell is he talking about now?

 

"Well, the fact that this partnership may have run its course."

 

"Fraser, that's bullshit." I raise my voice.

 

"Think about it," Mr. stay-calm-Mountie says. Does he have to analyze everything?

 

"Yesterday, you responded to a call without me because you felt my presence would undermine your efforts. And then today, you immediately accuse me of going over your head to your superior...does that sound like partners to you?" He looks wounded when he says that. Makes me feel bad for my big mouth.

 

"I was pissed, Fraser. I didn't really think you talked to Welsh."

 

"I think you did, Ray. And I also think it's time you gave some thought to getting another partner."

 

He turns his head to look out the passenger window, and leaves me to digest what he just rammed down my throat. I don't want another partner. I want Fraser. Okay, so here goes.

 

"Listen, um, you were right. I shouldn't've gone out on that call yesterday without you. And I'm sorry for lying to you and, shit, Fraser, I don't want another partner." I'm pretty sure I just whined that last part. Fraser can be a real pain, but he's the best partner I ever had. Hell, he's the best friend I ever had.

 

I glance over and he's looking at me again. Can't tell what he's thinking. "Are you sure, Ray?"

 

"Yeah, I'm positive." He's still looking at me. "What about you?" I say, "you wanna call it quits?"

 

He shakes his head. "No, but I don't think I can stand by and watch you endanger your life."

"Yeah, yeah, Fraser, you already told me. Okay, so if I promise to be good, we'll stay partners and we won't have this conversation again. Right?"

 

"Very well, Ray." He's smiling at me. Actually looks happy. You did good, Kowalski. I smile and turn the car around.

 

"I thought you wanted to get some lunch," he says.

 

"Not hungry. Got too much work to do."

 

"Understood."

 

I hear Dief whining in the backseat. He sorta sounds like I did a couple of minutes ago when I thought I was losing my Mountie. Only he's whining 'cause he's losing his French toast with maple syrup and a side of sausage.

 

I look at the wolf in the rear view mirror. "You can have a donut at the station," I tell him.

 

I glance at Fraser and he's giving me one of his disapproving looks. Can't win today. The rest of the drive to the precinct is made in silence. Which can be a good thing.

 

********************

 

We get back to the station and I make good on that donut for Dief. Fraser's still grumbling about it, but given the choice, I think I'd rather have Fraser pissed at me than Dief. Isn't there some kind of folktale about wolves carrying grudges to their graves? Don't know and don't want to find out.

 

Fraser and I been working on case files all afternoon. That's one reason alone to keep him as a partner; if it wasn't for him, I think my files would be backed up two years instead of two months. My phone rings. Great, a reprieve.

 

"Vecchio...yeah." It's my snitch, Max. He tells me he spotted Townsend, Sander's buddy who escaped with him, at an abandoned warehouse at the docks. Looks like he's meeting a fence. Shit. I gotta get this call now while Fraser's sitting across from me?

 

I look at Fraser while I listen...his attention is on one of the files. "Well...um, yeah, okay thanks." I hang up the phone. I have to go get Townsend, but I can't bring Fraser with me, I can't. I know I promised him I wouldn't go out on calls alone. But this is different. And I'd rather him be mad at me than have him die 'cause of me. Fraser looks up from the file.

 

I smile, trying to look casual. He frowns.

 

"Is something wrong, Ray?"

 

"Uh, no, why would you ask that?" I know I sound nervous.

 

"Well, for one thing you're stirring your coffee with your pencil," he says, watching my face.

 

I try to act cool. "Yeah, well, I like my coffee with some lead in it...gives it character," I say. Still, I take the pencil out of the cup.

 

"Yes, but I'm sure it doesn't do much for the taste. I suggest you don't drink it." He stands up.

 

"Where you going?" I ask, getting out of my chair.

 

"I should get back to the Consulate. I have some reports to complete by the end of today."

 

"Good idea, Frase, you don't wanna upset Inspector Thatcher." Think I sound obvious here?

 

"Inspector Thatcher?" he repeats her name and blinks.

 

"Yeah, you know, your superior officer."

 

"Ray, are you sure nothing's wrong?" He looks suspicious...or am I just paranoid?

 

"Nothing's wrong, Frase. Why do you keep asking me that?"

 

"You just referred to Inspector Thatcher as Inspector Thatcher...in addition to the fact that you told me I shouldn't upset her."

 

"So?"

 

"So, usually, you enjoy upsetting her, not to mention insulting her with your favorite nickname." He's not gonna let this drop. So what else is new.

 

"Look, Fraser, you better get back to the Consulate before the Ice Queen gets her panties in a bunch." That should do it. Bingo. He's motioning to Dief and he's leaving. Thank god. I'd hate to have to lie to him again, especially after yesterday.

 

"Perhaps I'll see you later," he says and he's backing up to leave.

 

"Yeah, perhaps, later," I say, pushing him out the door with my mind.

 

After he's gone, I wait a few minutes, and then I'm out the door. I'm in the GTO about to pull out when I see a flash of red in front of the car. I slam on the brakes.

 

"Shit, Fraser."

 

He's standing there staring at me, his face turned a little to the side, and his eyes are narrowed like they're almost closed. I look down. Don't need this from him now. Next thing I know he's at the passenger window, so I lean over and unlock the door. He pulls the front seat forward for Dief and then he gets in. We're both looking straight ahead now.

 

"Where are you going, Ray?" Can't tell if he's mad or not. But one thing's for sure, he ain't happy. I don't say anything for a few seconds. I could lie...again. Nah, better not. I decide to tell him the truth.

 

"That was Max on the phone. He spotted Bob Townsend at the docks...looks like he's meeting a fence."

 

I glance over at him and he's still staring straight ahead, his hands in fists on his lap. Jeez, I don't need this now. He turns slowly to look at me.

 

"You were responding to a call without me," he says, real quiet. I look out the windshield and don't say anything. "Ray, look at me." His voice is louder. I take a deep breath and look at him. I can't read any emotion on his face. "Why, Ray?"

 

I tell him the truth. Look, Fraser, this is personal. That creep, Townsend, killed a cop from my old precinct. I swore I'd take him in by myself. I made that promise to myself before I promised you that I wouldn't respond to any calls alone."

 

He sighs. "Ray, at best, you'll be suspended. Worst, you'll get yourself killed. I can't in good conscience allow you to go off by yourself."

 

"Look, Fraser, we're wasting valuable time here. I won't get suspended 'cause you're my partner and that means you won't tell Welsh. And I have no intention of getting myself killed. So, just get outta the car."

 

He shakes his head again. Now I'm pissed. I pound the steering wheel.

 

"Get the fuck out, Fraser!"

 

"No Ray. I'm coming with you."

 

I'm staring out the windshield and my teeth are clenched so tight my jaw's aching. I know Fraser. There's no way I'm getting him out of this car. Okay, so I resort to desperate measures.

 

"Okay, Fraser, you win." I put my hand in my jeans pocket like I'm looking for something. "Shit." I go through the rest of my pockets.

 

"What are you looking for, Ray?"

 

"The paper I wrote the address on. Fuck. I left it upstairs. Look, Frase, I'll be right back."

 

Before he says anything, I'm out of the car, sprinting inside the building and running out the back to the lot where we keep the unmarked cars. I know the keys will be in the green Crown Vic 'cause they always are. I jump into the car, reach for the keys under the mat. Oh yeah. I start the car and take off towards the other side of the building. Fraser's gonna be pissed, but I'll worry about him later.

 

********************

 

I arrive at the docks and park the car in an alley around the corner from the warehouse where Max saw Townsend. I get out and approach the building, running to the side where I find an unlocked door. I look around...there's no sign of anyone, not even a car. I slip inside and duck down, allowing my eyes to adjust to the dark. I hear some activity towards the rear of the room, so I stay low, hiding behind crates and boxes while I make my way to the source of the noise. It doesn't take long to locate my target. Townsend's talking quietly to two other guys...can't hear what he's saying. I look around the room, don't see anyone else. I figure I'll wait 'til the party breaks up and then I'll make my move. At the moment I don't give a shit about the other two creeps...it's Townsend I want.

 

I don't have to wait long; after a few minutes the two guys shake hands with Townsend and walk towards the front of the warehouse. I lose sight of them, but I can see light streaming into the room from the door as it opens, and then it disappears again as they close it behind them. It's time. Townsend's standing in the same spot, looking at a piece of paper. I leap out from the crate I'm crouching behind and before that asshole realizes what hit him, he's got a gun pointed at his head.

 

"Chicago PD, put your hands in the air before I separate them from your arms," I keep my voice low. Don't want to invite company. He does as he's told. But while I'm patting him down, I feel something hard sticking between my shoulder blades. Then a voice.

 

"Drop the gun, cop." Shit.

 

I drop the gun. Townsend turns around and punches me in the stomach. Fuck. Can't breathe. I drop to my knees and then my head feels like a brick was dropped on top of it. Falling to the floor, I hear laughing and then nothing.

 

********************

 

Shit, what the hell is that pain? I open my eyes. I'm lying on my side on the floor, hands tied behind my back, feet tied at the ankles. My boot gun's missing. My head feels like every hangover I ever had in my entire life combined into one. Forcing myself to sit up, I notice I'm still in the warehouse. Townsend's standing a few yards away. He hears me struggling and looks at me. The asshole's smiling. He walks over.

 

"Well, Detective, how are you feeling?"

 

I don't answer him. He grabs me by my hair and snaps my head back. Hurts like hell. I try not to react, but I hear a quiet groan rise in my throat.

 

"I asked you a goddamn question," he barks at me.

 

"I'm fucking great," I finally force out, my voice hoarse.

 

"Well, we'll have to do something about that," and he pushes me back to the floor and kicks me in the ribs. Can't help but cry out. Shit, I'm in big trouble. I stay where I am, on my side, breathing hard, trying to control the pain.

 

"If it were up to me, you'd already be rat food," he says. "But Sanders wants me to give you the deluxe package. Hey, I don't mind. But you're not gonna like it much."

 

Another guy approaches from the front of the building. He looks over to me and then starts talking quietly to Townsend. I strain to hear.

 

"Yeah, okay, I'll meet you there after I do the cop," I hear Townsend say.

 

Shit. Shit. Shit. I struggle with the rope that's binding my wrists, but all that does is cause more pain...the rope's already so tight, it's cutting into my wrists.

 

The other guy looks at me again and this time he smiles. Then he turns around and leaves. Townsend takes something out of his pocket and turns to face me. He puts it over his hand...fuck...brass knuckles. He walks over to me and kicks me in the ribs again. This time I can't hold back a scream and I curl up into a ball. He grabs me by my hair again, pulling me up and shoving me against a support beam. I'm scared to death, but I don't let him know that. I glare at him and he punches me in the face...the knuckles make it feel like I was hit with a bat. My face feels warm from the blood. I close my eyes and wait for another blow. He hits me again, this time on the other side of my face. I cry out again. I can hear my breathing...short, ragged breaths...hurts like hell just to breathe. I think about what Fraser said, and I'd be pissed at him for being right again if I wasn't about to die. God, I wish he were here right now. I can't stop my body from shaking; I have no control. I hear a weird noise coming out of my mouth, sort of like one long whimper. I'm waiting for the next assault, my eyes squeezed shut.

 

It doesn't come. Oh fuck, am I dead already? Then why the hell do I still hurt so much?

 

I suddenly realize someone is saying my name and I feel my hands fall away from each other. My wrists still hurt, but they're not tied together anymore. I hear my name again. A light touch on my face. I force my eyes open.

 

Oh God. It's Fraser. He's wiping my face with a cloth and he's talking to me.

 

"Fraser..." I can barely whisper his name.

 

"It's okay, Ray. The paramedics will be here soon. You'll be all right."

 

He keeps talking quietly to me while he wipes my face. I manage to put my hand on his arm. I want to tell him that I'm sorry. I want to thank him for saving my life. I look into his eyes. He stops what he's doing and wraps his hand around mine and smiles at me. Then everything goes dark.

 

********************

 

I'm spread out across the couch that Fraser made up like a bed for me. Dief's lying across my feet doing a great impression of a blanket. Fraser's in the kitchen making some tea. I wanted coffee but he said tea would be better for me. Never understood that...caffeine is caffeine. Just tastes better in coffee.

 

Anyway, I'm really glad to be in my own apartment. The doctor wanted me to stay in the hospital but I bitched so much he let me come home, well, only after Fraser promised to look after me for a few days. Doctor said there's no permanent damage. Let's see, he said I have a moderate concussion, two cracked ribs, my face is pretty banged up, but no broken bones, and a lot of bruising that makes my body look like a TV test pattern. I'm taking pain pills every four hours. Can't remember the last time I took one...Fraser's been taking care of that. But based on the way I'm feeling, I think it's time for another one. At least I'm rid of that pain in the ass, Townsend. He's in jail where he belongs, thanks to Fraser.

 

I look over the back of the couch and watch Fraser for a few minutes. I know he's pissed at me...hasn't said anything about the way I ditched him in the GTO. Shit. That was a fucking stupid thing to do. If Fraser wasn't Fraser, I'd be dead now. And Welsh was spitting tacks he was so mad. He told me that after my medical leave is over, I'm suspended for a week. Told him I learned my lesson, but he's still suspending me. Guess I deserve it. Now if I can only get Fraser to forgive me.

 

He's coming into the living room with a glass of water and a bottle of pills. Yeah, I knew it was time.

 

"How are you feeling?" he asks me, and he's opening the bottle, not even looking at me.

 

I go to sit up...takes some effort, not only because it hurts, but because the wolf blanket is holding my legs down. Dief finally gets the message and climbs down from the couch and disappears under the coffee table. I'm still struggling to sit up. Fraser looks like he's about to help me, but I wave my hand to let him know that I can do it myself.

 

"Um, like I can use these," is my answer. "Thanks."

 

"Put out your hand," he says. I do and he drops one pill from the bottle into my palm and hands me the glass of water. I swallow the pill with the water and give the glass back to him. He's still not looking at me. Shit. This is gonna be hard.

 

"I'll be right back with the tea," he says. And he turns around and goes back into the kitchen. My head is pounding so I close my eyes and rest it on the back of the couch. A few minutes later I hear two cups being placed on the coffee table and I feel Fraser sitting down next to me. I open my eyes and roll my head against the back of the couch to look at him...it hurts too much to lift. He's staring straight ahead, drinking his tea. I take a deep breath.

 

"Fraser."

 

"Yes, Ray." He's still looking straight ahead.

 

"Look, Fraser, I know you're mad at me...you got every right to be. I did a really stupid thing."

 

He looks at me now, and he's working his jaw the way he does when he's pissed and his eyes are narrowed. I'm finding it hard to look at him.

 

"Yes, Ray, you did a very stupid thing." He keeps looking at me. I guess he's waiting for an answer.

 

"I'm sorry, I just...it's just when Max told me he spotted Townsend, I had to go after him myself...it was personal."

 

"So you've told me," he says. "You know, Ray, making that promise to yourself and having me accompany you to apprehend Townsend were not mutually exclusive."

 

"Yeah, well, I thought they were."

 

"Ray, you were almost killed." He says that real quiet, and he shakes his head and looks away from me again.

 

"I know that, Fraser. I'd be dead if you didn't show up. I owe my life to you more than once. We're partners...."

 

He jerks his head in my direction and stops me with a warning look. Obviously, I just said the wrong thing.

 

"Partners, Ray? How can you still call us partners after the way you acted yesterday? Partners trust each other. They cover each other's backs," he fires at me.

 

"I trust you, Fraser. You know I get unhinged sometimes. I dunno, I got that phone call from Max and I just snapped." He doesn't say anything. "I'm sorry I gave you the slip," I say. I really am. "Look, I promise I won't...."

 

Oh man, that was the wrong thing to say. He jumps off the couch and starts walking towards the kitchen.

 

"I'm tired, Ray...I'd prefer we didn't talk. Your bed is made up if you want to sleep. I'll help you to the bedroom if you need my assistance."

 

I watch him sit down at the kitchen table. He leans back in his chair, and he's looking down at the table. Neither one of us says anything for a few minutes. I can't go to bed with this hanging over my head...it's too important. I know I fucked up big time. I have to make things right with Fraser.

 

I raise my voice so he can hear me. "You think I don't trust you."

 

He looks up at me. "Can you blame me, Ray?"

 

"Fraser, the way I went off like that had nothing to do with you; it was me. I..."

 

"Don't, Ray. I'd rather you say nothing than hand me your platitudes. You obviously have a problem with me being your partner." He sighs. "The best thing you can do at this point is request a new partner, someone who carries a gun, someone you can trust." His eyes are still cast down at the table.

 

"I trust you, Fraser."

 

"I don't believe you, Ray."

 

"What can I do to make you believe me?"

 

He takes a deep breath. "I don't know."

 

"Shit. I'm gonna have to tell him. Maybe I should've told him from the beginning, I don't know, but I'm losing him and I have no choice. I struggle to get to my feet and walk over to the kitchen and sit down next to him. I'm trying not to be obvious, but I have to support my ribs with my hand; even with the medication they're still killing me. Fraser won't meet my eyes.

 

"Frase."

 

He doesn't respond.

 

"Fraser." I put my hand on his arm. He looks up at me. He looks so sad, and it's all my fault.

 

"I'm asking you to give me another chance," I say. "Despite what you think, I trust you...hell, there's no one else I trust as much as you, well, maybe Welsh and....um, Dief."

 

I glance over to see Dief peer out at me from under the coffee table.

 

"I know I haven't been the best partner...or friend...these past few days," I say. "I have to tell you something, Frase, and, maybe then you'll understand why I been acting so unhinged." He looks up at me, his head is tilted and he's squinting his eyes. I look down at the table and go on. "I should've told you this before, but, um, it was just too hard. I never talked about it before, never had to. But if we're gonna stay partners, then you need to know this."

 

I run my hands through my hair and take a deep breath. He's watching me, waiting to hear what I'm gonna say. "Um, I had a partner at the 1-6, his name was Tommy...Tom Blanchard. We were out on a call when...when he got shot. He died in my...he died. The assholes who killed him were Sanders and his pal, Townsend. I promised Tommy when he was dying that I'd bring them in myself, and I did. But then they skipped out, and I had to honor that promise again."

 

I stop talking and look up at Fraser. He still looks sad, but now I think it's for me. He doesn't say anything, so I continue.

 

"Frase, I couldn't risk losing you too, especially not to Sanders; I couldn't take that chance. And then when Max called about Townsend, I know I made a promise to you, but I was scared. Tommy didn't even have his gun out when they killed him; there's no doubt in my mind those creeps wouldn't've hesitated to kill you too. You're my best friend. All I could think about was Tommy dying and how I couldn't stand it if that happened to you. I know I should've told you, but I.... Look, Frase, you gotta know that I trust you with my life. I'm so sorry I lied to you. If I could take back the last couple days I would. Jeez, if it wasn't for you, I'd be dead now." I shudder when I hear myself say that.

 

He's still looking at me but he doesn't look as sad...or pissed anymore. We're quiet for a few minutes. Then he leans forward in his chair.

 

"I'm sorry, Ray. I'm sorry for your partner and for everything that happened. I wish you had told me sooner, but I understand how difficult it was for you to talk about." He squeezes my arm. "I appreciate your trying to protect me." He shakes his head and gives me a half smile. "My anger was the result of not being able to protect you. I do hope that, in the future, we'll be able to communicate better with each other."

 

"I know, Frase. Like I told Welsh, I learned my lesson. I wink at him. "But I still think you woulda been made the second we walked into that bar. We need to have a talk about you ironing your jeans."

 

He scowls at me. And then something occurs to me. "How did you know where I was anyway?" I ask him.

 

"You had told me where you keep your informants' phone numbers," he says. "I called Max."

 

"You know, Frase, you're the only person who knows where they are." He smiles at me like he understands what I'm trying to say. "So, um, do you believe that I trust you?"

 

"Yes, I believe you do, Ray. But your behavior at times...."

 

"Look, whenever I start acting like an asshole, you got my permission to kick me in the head." I grin at him.

 

"Well...." He's looking down at the table and I think he's holding back a smile.

 

"So, you'll give me another chance?" I ask.

 

He looks at me and he's real serious again. "Don't do it again."

 

I shake my head. Somehow, I can't get the words out. A few more minutes pass. I finally speak.

 

"So, we're still...."

 

"I think so," he says.

 

"Good. Greatness."

 

The End