Pairings: F/V, F/K (both implied)
Teaser: Ray is undercover in Las Vegas for about a month when he tries to justify to Armondo's niece why he is there. He doesn't come up with good answers.
Notes/Disclaimer: Copyright to Alliance. This was written in a short period of time, so be kind!


Even The Blind...
by L.A.K.

 

Armondo Langostoni entered the backyard behind the enormous house with trepidation. He hated these types of gatherings and there seemed to be a ton of them always happening, usually centering on a distant relative's birthday, promotion, graduation or some other Excuse To Celebrate. He was getting sick of it. Not, of course, the gangster he was portraying, who *loved* these get-togethers, these pathetic excuses for getting drunk and starting fights that turned into grudges which lasted for years. It was Ray Vecchio who was the one who hated these social encounters.

He despised thinking of how many of these dreary functions he must attend before his return to the basic insanity of Chicago. They made him nervous and frighteningly on edge. What if he forgot who someone was? What if someone didn't recognize him? It all made him queasy to think of how he just might die while refilling his glass at the punchbowl. He couldn't even drown his sorrows in alcohol. he'd taken up drinking as of late, seeing it seemed to be a habit Armondo was fond of. Oh, that would be perfect! Just letting it slip how he missed his coworkers, his family or Benny...

He straightened his stance and blocked out the rest of his morbid thoughts. He was Armondo, not some cop who was homesick.

"AR-MON-DOOOOO!!"

An older woman, clad in a loud satin dress came up to smear her lipstick all over his cheek in a sloppy, unwelcome kiss. Ray smiled and loudly uttered a passionate greeting in Italian and embraced the female, knowing his "sister" Conesta, an overly vivacious woman, would find it odd if her brother did not reciprocate as such. He fought the urge to throw up. The woman began to babble, her breath permeated with booze. It reminded him of the good 'ole days of being at home with Pop.

"Oh, how are you, brother? I see you are looking well? How waz yor trip here? I am *sooo* glad to see youuu!!!" She proceeded to throttle the Italian, making him dizzy. "We *mussst* talk!! But! But! But first, Karina wants to see you! See? There she is by the bar! Go! Go, go! You go and talk with her, yes? Then, *we*...we talk like itz old times!"

He was shoved away, thankful he did not have to respond to the old bat for at least a while. He'd only been undercover for a month and was wondering how on Earth he had lasted as long as he had. It was an impossible task! How did he think he was going to take over the role of an Italian mobster just because he looked like him?! He was a simple Chicago detective who couldn't make it undercover in a neighborhood bar, let alone here.

What about the drug connections the FBI *didn't* know that he'd just recently learned of? What about the *paid* women on the side Armondo was known to frequent? How the Hell was he going to stay alive for at least six months? What brilliant genius thought this up for him? WHY did had he conceeded to it?!

There was no rational explanation.

Well, there were valid reasons for him to be here. But he couldn't believe how things had turned out. Back home, it seemed as if he never existed. Even the Riv was gone. He sighed at his immense loss. Even Benny seemed to not even miss him and was acting more coarse, blunt...more cruel. What was up with that, anyway? And why did his replacement look like an anorexic Sting? It would be highly comical, if it wasn't so sad!

Well, he didn't have to stay at this function for very long tonight. All he needed to do was make his rounds, show his face and be done with it. He made his way towards the bar, to the niece known as Kairna. She was young, about seventeen and wore dark glasses. Her long, straight black hair flowed down her back. Her large, dark, unseeing eyes were beautiful. Too bad she was a "relative".

From the incomplete files he barely had a chance to read, he'd deduced she was a very bright person, quiet, but passionate in her hobbies and views. It wasn't until he came up beside her did he notice the white and red cane sitting beside her. She was blind!

Ray breathed a sigh of relief. At least he didn't have to worry about being discovered by anyone tonight. Everyone was already so toasted, they didn't know which way was up, let alone if it was Armondo that was really there. Even Karina couldn't make the distinction, thank God. He slid onto the barstool beside her and waited.

"Greetings, Armondo." she said, her smile growing as she spoke.

"Hello, yourself, Karina. How are you?"

"Oh, I am okay. Classes are not as bad as I'd thought they would be at the college, but the dorm is a pain."

**Seventeen and already in college. A bright girl indeed.** Ray thought.

"You'll make it, I know you will."

"Thanks, Ally. I knew you'd encourage me to continue something I hate."

Ray froze. *AL-EE*? Was this a nickname for Armondo? He decided to play along.

"Well, you're still young. You have your whole life in front of you."

She seemed to turn this over in her mind before speaking.

"Hmmm. That's not the Armondo *I* know. He'd normally tell me to watch out for the boys on campus!"

He could tell she was joking, but this conversation was starting to make him nervous.

"You're right! What am I thinking? You be careful! There are a lot of men out there who don't know what a wonderful girl you are like I do!"

He got up, fully intent on leaving.

"Where are you going?" she plaintively asked. "It's been months since we've had a chance to talk."

He cringed. He had to get out of this and fast! He came in close, his voice low and calm.

"Well, you know the family business, love. I must see it is working out. I wish I could stay..."

She recoiled in horror, her face scrunching up behind her dark glasses. She coughed a bit, turning her head from side to side in obvious discomfort.

"*Who* on God's green Earth is wearing that hideous cologne?!" she spat out.

"I-I..um don't know. Why?"

"Why?! *WHY?!* You of all people, Ally! You know..."

She leaned closer, but not by much...and sniffed deeply. Ray backed away a bit, wishing he could sink into the ground. She said nothing, however. Her face remained expressionless, even when she turned back to the bar and took a sip of her neglected drink. Finally, Ray found his voice.

"Are you okay, Karina?"

"Yes, I'm fine." she bluntly responded. She then reached out her right hand towards him. "Give me your hand." she stated.

Reluctantly, he gave it to her. She let her fingers trail over it for just a moment before releasing it and returning to her Pepsi.

"You've been gone far too long, Armondo. It's as if I don't recognize you."

Her voice was deadpan, flat. Ray didn't know what to say. How could he be involved in such a mess?

"I'm sorry, Karina. I must go now. Perhaps we can talk later."

"That would be nice." she said, her voice without emotion.

She let him leave without another word.

Ray left in fear of being outed, as it were, by his niece. He retreated to the large, Victorian house and found comfort in a glass of Scotch. He watched the party from the window, staring glumly and hating his life. A voice startled him out of his somber mood.

"It doesn't look any better at night, does it?"

He spun to see Karina closing the door behind her, cane in hand. She wasn't wearing her sunglasses.

"Hey! How are you? What are you doing here?" he asked as causally as possible.

She smiled. "Checking on you."

She found her way effortlessly to the bed and sat down, facing away. The silence dragged on for several minutes.

"You're not him, are you?" she finally asked.

"What do you mean?"

She turned to face him, fresh tears on her face.

"You are not Armondo, are you? What are you, some kind of cop?"

Ray stayed silent, unaware of what to do. If it had been a seeing person, he could at least *try* to walk the walk, talk the talk and display all kinds on mannerisms he knew to be characteristic of Mr. Langastoni. But, he had a strange feeling Karina had seen through all that in a heartbeat.

"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me, whoever you are." she said.

Ray finally decided he owed her the truth.

"No. No, I'm not him."

She sighed, her smile bittersweet.

"He's dead, isn't he?"

Vecchio waited only seconds before answering.

"Yes, I'm afraid so."

She brought her hand to her head as she began to cry again. Ray fought the urge to hold her.

"I...know what he was. I never lied to myself about that." she said, her face blank, her eyes ultimately empty. "What I did fool myself about was the fact that he'd never leave me like this. Why...do you think people convince themselves of such ridiculous things?"

Ray grew quiet. He thought about all he'd left behind in the short time he'd been away. The pain of loss echoed deeply inside him.

"I guess it's just a means of survival, to justify what they need, no matter how impossible it seems."

It was his voice, this time, that held the inflection of sadness.

"Hmm." she said. "Left someone important behind, eh?"

That expression caused Ray to laugh a bit.

"Yeah, you could say that."

"Will you ever go back to them?"

Ray regarded the skyline of Las Vegas for a long time before responding.

"I hear they...prefer the company of another lately."

"I see." she said. "You know, I don't believe I've ever heard infidelity so eloquently described, kind sir."

Ray ruefully grinned and shook his head.

"My...replacement seems to be all the rage." he bitterly quipped.

She seemed to consider this a while.

"Surely there are those who remember you. Care for you even."

He shrugged. "I guess."

"I highly doubt that the arrival of someone new, despite their supposed charm, would eradicate your presence in the lives of those you care about and those who cared deeply for you. Don't you agree?"

Ray cocked his eyebrows. She was a truly kind person.

"I guess. I mean...I'd like to think people wouldn't just forget about me."

"All except this special someone, right?"

His smiled vanished. "Yeah. All except them."

When she spoke, her voice was matter-of-fact.

"If they can't wait for you, then maybe they are not worth it."

His breath caught in his throat at her words. She stood, slowly coming closer. He met her half way.

"May I touch your face?" she asked.

"Sure." he breathed.

In the low light of the room, her hand caressed his features delicately, with her eyes downcast, deep in concentration.

"You do look like him." she announced. "But the smell is all wrong."

"I kinda guessed that." he said.

She smiled again.

"The cologne." she explained. "I'm highly allergic to it. If I breathe it for too long, I get an asthma attack. Also, I have a bad skin reaction as well to several soaps and perfumes. As for Armondo, well, he knew ever since I was a kid to not wear the stuff around me. It was my first dance in middle school, you see. Mom told me not to wear any perfume, knowing what it would do. I did anyway and I got extremely sick. It was Ally who took me to the hospital that night and got me treatment. He never told Ma on the solemn promise I never do it again. I went along with it. It was our little secret."

Green eyes surveyed her with deep sorrow.

"I'm sorry, Karina."

"Don't be." she said. "I know he wasn't a good man all the time. I still miss him though." She turned to leave. "I won't tell anyone, but I don't see how you're going to survive like this."

"Sometimes I don't either." he confessed.

"Hopefully you will at least be safe where you came from. It would make sense for them to least be smart enough to get a replacement as outwardly convincing as you." she quipped.

She left out and Ray took a long sip of his neglected drink.

"No, love, from what I hear I don't think they did."

END