"Ohhh."
"Umm.."
Stanley Raymond Kowalski threw his pencil down in disgust and glared
at
the mountie who had, over the course of the last few months become
the
bane of his existance, and his very best friend. Constable Benton
Fraser, RCMP was shifting in the chair that he he had pulled up
alongside
Ray's desk, his face screwed up with pain.
"Okay, that's it. You sound like a moose in heat.
You're back's still bothering you, isn't it?"
"I'm fine Ray. Don't concern yourself about me."
Fraser assured him. "You know, if you had ever heard a moose in heat,
i'm sure that you would find it a very interesting experience.."
"Stop! I'm not in the mood for the canadian discover channel. The
point
is , you jumped out of a second story window. Of course, any
normal
person would have used the stairs, but hey, where's the fun
in that. You
fell on your back and made a big mountie-shaped splat on the ground.
Look, I know a chiropractor, I'll give him a call, " Ray reached
for the
phone.
"I said that would be uneccessary Ray. I'll see you tomorrow."
He stood up stiffly, clenching his teeth.
As he walked away, Ray called after him, "If you're fine, how come
you're walking like my old man on a cold day?"
The mountie ignored him and left the squadroom. Torn between
irritation
and worry for his friend, Ray didn't hear Francesca come
up behind him.
He leaned back in his chair and his head made contact with her bare
midriff. The scent of her Channel #5 knockoff filled his sense and
all
thoughts of Fraser's back and his own name were momentarily forgotten.
"Fraser doesn't look good, which for him , is quie an accomplishment,"
Francesca said worriedly. "It's his back, right? It's all that bimbo,
Lady Feet's fault."
"Shoes. Lady Shoes," Ray corrected.
"Feet, shoes, who cares?" she gestured impatiently, and plopped down
on
the edge of Ray's desk. "What is it about Fraser? He seems to be
drawn
to the worst kind of women."
Ray's eyes, and in fact, his whole being were focused on Francesca's
shapely legs dangling in front of him. "What are you talking about?"
"Don't tell me that no one has filled you in about Fraser and Vile
Vicky."
"Vile Vicky?" Ray perked up. "I want details and videotape if
available."
"Later, perv. Right now, it's our responsiblity as Fraser's friends
to
find a way to help him. Too ease his pain. Got any ideas?" She jumped
off his desk.
Disappointed that the show was over, Ray answered, "No. Nothing that
I
can think of."
Francesca's ponderings were interrupted by a mop bucket slamming into
her legs. Caught off balance she fell into the arms of a very pleasantly
surprised Ray.
"Sorry, ma'am," the janitor said, and moved his bucket away.
Setting her on her feet, Ray said," I don't know what that guy's problem
is, but he's nearly killed me twice this week."
Francesca took a step and stumbled back into Ray's arms. She reached
down and removed her shoe. "Damn," she said. "The heel's broken and
I
just paid 60 bucks for them."
Gazing at her naked foot, an idea popped into Ray's mind. "Hey Frannie,
I think I know what we can do for Fraser."
"Oh?," she said suspiciously.
"Don't worry, you're gonna like this."
Several hours later, Fraser sat alone at his desk in the consulate.
Not
even his father had shown up to keep him company. He winced as another
spasm of pain went through him. Perhaps he should take an,
and he
grimaced at this, aspirin.
What would dad think of this weakness, he thought as he slowly got
up
and made his way to Inspecter Thatcher's office. He knew he would
find a
bottle there. It seemed she was always taking them , particularly
when
one of Ray and his adventures took an unexpected turn.
He was interrupted by a loud pounding on the front door.
"Open up, Fraser. It's me." Ray's voice called.
Having no desire to deal with Ray's seemingly endless supply of kinetic
energy, Fraser briefly considered pretending that no one was home.
His
concience got the better of him, though, and he opened the door.
The
smiling faces of Ray and Francesca greeted him.
"We were in the neighborhood and thought we'd drop by, " Ray smirked.
"Aren't you going to invite us in?" Francesca batted her eyelashes
at
Fraser in a way that he found quite frightening.
"It's late and I was preparing for bed, Perhaps tomorrow. ." Fraser
began.
Ray cut him off. "You're being rude, and that's a capital offiense
in
Canada. Let us in and we won't report you."
With a sigh, Fraser excepted the inevitable and stood aside to allow
them in. After shutting the door, he turned to face them. The
expressions
on their faces made him wary. They were up to something.
The two exchanged glances and Ray said, "Look Fraser, we're worried
about you."
"I'm fine,"
"No you're not. You're hurt and we want to help you."
"Particularly me," Francesca put in.
"So I was thinking. I have this cousin, Al. He's got a bad back
and he
goes to this japanese place whee they have these women who walk on
his
back. He swears it works wonders. Anyway, since Frannie here only
weighs
about 30 pounds soaking wet, I figured, what the hell, let's
give it a
try." Francesca nodded her head vigorously in agreement.
"Do I understand you correctly, You want Francesca to walk on my back?"
Fraser asked flabergasted.
"That's it in a nutshell, " Francesca said quickly.
'Certainly not. It wouldn't be proper. What would you're brother say."
"Who cares?" she answered. "I'm only going to walk on your back, not
knock you down and have my way with you, unless you think that would
help."
Ray cleared his throat, "Since I'm, for all intents and purposes,
her
brother , till he gets back. I officially give my permission."
"Thank you," she smiled sweetly.
"Any time. Now Fraser, we're not leaving until we do this, and if
you
don't say yes right now we're going to start singing."
"Donny and Marie songs," Francesca added.
"Oh dear."
Francesca took a deep breath, "Oh I'm a little bit country," Fraser
winced at her cracking voice.
"And I'm a little bit rock and roll," Ray tuned in, if that word could
be used to describe his singing.
Fraser held up his hand in surrender. "Enough! Do with me what you
will.
Just stop the wailing."
Ray rubbed his hands together excitedly,
" Okay, let's do this thing in the Ice Queen's office, because it's
nice
and roomy and because she would explode if she knew about it."
The three entered Thatcher's office. Francesca kicked off her shoes
and
said, "Okay big boy. Lay down on the floor and prepare yourself."
Fraser looked at Ray for sympathy, but found no help there. "Better
do
what she say. You don't want to make her angry."
With trepidation, Fraser lowered himself to the floor.
"Ready?" Francesca asked.
"Well, um. ."
Frannie placed a foot on his shoulder blade. The heat of his body
warmed
her toes. She smiled; she would have to think of a way to
thank Ray for
this. Closing her eyes, she placed the other foot on his back. This
is
almost better than sex. Almost, she thought.
"Are you okay?" Ray asked.
"Yes. This is suprisingly not bad." Fraser answered.
She began to knead the tense muscles with her toes. Fraser grunted
in
what didn't sound like pain, so she moved one foot lower.
"Yes! That's the spot, Francesca," Fraser exclaimed.
Tenderly, she massaged the sore spot. Fraser sighed in contentment.
Watching Frannie's feet work their magic, Ray noticed that the
tempterature
in the room had risen by several degrees. Or maybe it was
just him. "Uh, Frannie, when you're done with Fraser, I've been a
little
stiff lately, maybe you could. ."
"Not a chance, Ray. I wouldn't want to risk breaking one of the petite
bones in you skinny little body,"
"I'm sturdier than I look," Ray said, a bit desperately.
"Pardon me," Fraser said, " But if you wouldn't mind going back to
my
shoulder blades. That felt. . nice."
"Of course, Fraser," she purred.
For the next ten minutes, Fraser got the backrub to end all backrubs.
At
last, he said, "Thank you Francesca. I feel so much better now."
Reluctantly, she stepped off him, and he got to his feet.
"Are you sure? I could do that for hours," she offered.
"Thank you Francesca, but I feel fine now," he paused to collect his
thoughts. "I don't know how to say. . it's just that, well, I was
raised
not to show pain, or to burden other people with my problems.
. I don't
know what to say to you two, Francesca, Ray. Thank you
for being so
concerned about me. It's gratifying to know that I have
friends who care
about me. . '" he trailed off.
"Easy Fraser, don't blow a fuse," Ray said embarrased.
"Shut up, Ray." Frannie said and squeezed Fraser's hand. "You don't
have
to say anything .
That's what friends are for. Come on Ray, Fraser needs some sleep."
As Fraser walked them to the door, Ray said," Don't sleep on the floor
tonight. Use the royal bed. I don't think Queen Elizabeth will mind."
"Goodnight Ray, Francesca, " Fraser said smiling.
Standing outside in the cool night air, Francesca turned to look at
Ray,
standing beside her with his hands in his pockets, fidgeting.
Impulsively,
she kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks Ray. You're a good
friend to
me too."
They walked to the car in silence, until the stunned Ray recovered
his
power of speech.
"That's all I get? Fraser gets the ultimate footsie and all I get
is a
kiss on the cheek? This sucks!"
"You're my brother, remember?"
"I am not your brother."
"Yes, you are."
"No, I'm not.
"Yes, you are."
"I don't even look like you're brother."
"Proves nothing. You're my brother and I love you."
"I hate you."
finis
sharonruth@webtv.net
Fight Spam! Join the Coalition Against Unsolicited Commercial Email.
http://www.cauce.org/index.html