Story by Slash Duck

Written by Shannon McKinnon

This story is the direct result of a perfectly innocent conversation Slash Duck and I were having recently (well, as innocent as any of our conversations get). She shared an anecdote with me; and I immediately saw the slash potential in it. She agreed and gave some very helpful suggestions on how to improve the story, and this is the result.

Rated R for a Mountie talking dirty and an implied m/m relationship.

These characters legally belong to Alliance, but that does not mean that the fans can't have fun with them every once in a while.

Ben sighed happily and snuggled closer to Ray on the couch. It was almost 1:00 a.m. and they were watching an old movie on TV. Since he and Ray had moved in together, Ben had learned to appreciate many new things; staying up way past his bedtime and watching TV being merely one of them.

Ben sat up a little again as a commercial caught his attention. A busty blonde woman in a very skimpy nightie was looking directly into the camera and talking in a very sexy voice. "Call now for some of the hottest, naughtiest talk. I'll be waiting for you." Ben shook his head in bewilderment.

"Ray," he said, "I don't understand phone sex. I mean, what is the appeal?"

Ray looked at him and grinned. "Phone sex can be great fun, Benny. Haven't you ever tried it?"

Ben shook his head.

"Of course you haven't. You have had such a sheltered life in some ways."

"Sheltered?"

"Sure." Ray's grin grew even bigger. "I mean, growing up isolated in the Canadian wilderness, there's a lot you missed out on. But that's OK, you have me here to teach you."

"Oh, really?"

"Sure."

"You think I need teaching?" Ben leaned over and gave Ray a kiss that left him breathless.

"Well," Ray's voice broke and he cursed silently and cleared his throat. "Not in all areas, Benny. But you're so... reserved sometimes. You're too buttoned up."

Ben looked down at himself and then back up at Ray, and a playful smile spread across his face. "It appears you may be correct, Ray. I am too buttoned up. Would you care to give me some instruction in this area?" He lay back against the cushions.

"Oh, absolutely, Benny." Ray attacked his lover's shirt with a vengeance.

Ben looked at his watch and held back a sigh with difficulty. It was after 7:00 and he was still at work, trying to catch up. It had been a very busy week for both he and Ray, and they had hardly seen each other at all. When they were both home at the same time; they were too tired to do more than grab a quick meal and fall into bed for some sleep.

Ray was working late again tonight, too; but he had promised Benny that he would get out at a reasonable hour and pick Benny up at the Consulate, and then they could go home and spend some real time together.

Ben smiled at the thought. Ben's smile slipped a little as he thought of his and Ray's conversation the other night. He knew that Ray had just been trying to goad him, but it had worked. Did Ray really think he was repressed? Ben sighed, then started slightly as the phone on his desk rang.

Ben glanced at the caller ID box that Inspector Thatcher had insisted on installing a few weeks ago, and he smiled. Maybe they had been a good idea after all. The box showed the call was coming from the 27th Precinct, and only one person could be calling the Consulate from there at this hour.

So, Ray thought Fraser couldn't talk dirty, did he? Maybe it was time the good detective learned a little lesson of his own. Ben picked up the receiver. "Thank you for calling the Canadian Consulate. Benton Fraser speaking, Constable and sex toy."

Ben heard a sharp, surprised intake of breath, and he grinned. "Yes, Canadians are very grateful guests in your country, and we try to be most accommodating in our thanks. For example, I would very much like to give you an orgasm as a way of showing my appreciation. Would you like to know how I'm going to do that?"

A strangled noise came over the phone.

"Ah, yes. Well, first I will give you a kiss in which my tongue thoroughly and carefully explore every inch of your beautiful, luscious mouth. Then I will slowly run my hand over your body, pausing to fondle and toy with your nipples. Next, I shall remove your belt, and if you ask me very nicely, I will use it to bind your hands. I think I will let you leave your jacket and tie and shirt on, however, as I believe that will drive you slightly crazy. After I bind your hands- or not, the choice is completely yours- I will unzip your pants and pull them down to your ankles. Then I will drag you to the floor and lay you out on your back. I will then fondle and nip and kiss your cock through the glorious smooth silk of your boxer shorts. I will then proceed to roll you over on to your stomach, and I will remove your boxer shorts so that I may fully observe the wonder that is your ass. I will then thoroughly cover each ass cheek with kisses, before sliding my tongue between your beautiful butt cheeks and-"

Fraser broke off abruptly as he heard light footsteps approaching his office. Was Inspector Thatcher still here? He thought that she had gone home. Oh, God, she hadn't heard any of that, had she?

But it was not Meg Thatcher who stepped into his office. "Hey, Benny, you ready to go?"

Ben looked at Ray standing before him in total horrified disbelief, then looked at the phone receiver in his hand. Slowly, he moved the receiver to his ear. He could hear the other person breathing on the other end. With a gasp, Ben slammed the receiver back into the cradle.

"You OK, Benny?" Ray asked.

Ben was staring at him, open-mouthed, and he looked upset. He was also turning beet red, for no reason that Ray could see.

"Who was on the phone, love?" Ray asked.

Ben jumped as if struck. "What?" He asked loudly.

"Who were you talking too?" Ray asked patiently.

"Oh." Ben looked at the telephone as if he had never seen one before. "It.. it was no one, Ray. It was a wrong number. Could we just go home now please?"

Grabbing his Stetson, Ben left the office and headed rapidly down the hall.

"Sure, Benny." Ray said to the empty air. He sighed as he followed after his lover. Benny could be so weird sometimes.

Ben sat silently in the car, staring out the window. What had he just done? Who had been on the other end of the phone? He felt himself blushing again at the thought. Who had been calling the Consulate at that hour anyway? It must have been someone looking for Ray, who knew he would be at the Consulate. Which could only mean that Fraser knew him or her as well. Maybe it was time to apply for that transfer back to Canada.

"Benny, are you OK? You've been awfully quiet. Did something happen at work today?"

Ben suppressed a sudden giggle that wanted to escape him. Maybe he should tell Ray the truth. 'Why yes, Ray. Remember how you thought I should be less repressed? Well, I decided to start by talking dirty to one of your co-workers. Which one? I have no idea.' Ben sighed.

"Benny?" Ray was sounding worried now.

"It's nothing, Ray. I'm just tired."

"Constable Fraser, I need you to take these files over to the 27th Precinct right away." Inspector Thatcher was holding a stack of files out to him, and from her expression Ben could tell she was in no mood for argument.

Oh, dear. It had been nearly two weeks since the phone call and he had managed to avoid going to the 27th ever since; having Turnbull handle the transfer of paperwork that he usually would. Still, he had known that he couldn't avoid going back there forever, much as he'd like too, and it looked like today was the day.

He took the stack of files from Inspector Thatcher. "I'm on my way, Ma'am."

Taking a deep breath, Fraser pushed open the door and entered the squadroom. He could do this. He was a Mountie.

Almost immediately, he ran into Ray Kowalski. "Hey, Fraser! Where the hell have you been hiding?"

"I've been busy at work, Ray."

"Yeah, and at home, too I bet." Kowalski gave him a wink.

Fraser started. "What do mean by that, Ray?"

"Oh, nothing. It's just I imagine it's a full time job keeping a red-blooded Italian-American happy. Keep up the good work." With a punch on the shoulder and another wink, Kowalski walked away.

Ben stared after him in dismay. Oh, God. Had it been Ray on the other end of the phone? It hadn't, had it? If it had been, he would die a thousand deaths. He could think of few things worse.

Then he rounded the corner and came face to face with Francessca.

"Hey, Frase." She said, smiling at him. "I haven't seen you in a while. My brother been keeping you busy?" She winked at him.

"I... uh..." The collar of his tunic suddenly felt unbearably tight, and Ben could feel himself blushing. Oh, damn.

Fran grinned. "That's OK, Fraser. I really don't need any details. I mean, you don't need to talk dirty to me or anything."

Ben jumped. "What?!" His voice came out much louder than he had wanted it to.

Fran laughed and walked back over to her desk.

Oh my God. No, Ben tried to reassure himself. It had not been Francessca. Of course it hadn't. Francessca always talked that way. She was just being Frannie. It had most certainly not been her on the other end of the phone that night. God would not be that cruel.

Rounding the corner, Fraser saw that Ray's desk was empty. Ben stopped a passing detective. "Excuse me, but is Detective Vecchio about?"

"Yes, he's here. He just stepped down the hallway. He should be right back; you can wait at his desk if you want."

"Thank you kindly."

"Hey, Fraser." Came a deep voice from behind him. "It's good to hear your voice again."

Fraser whirled around to face Jack Huey. "What is that supposed to mean?" He asked a little harshly.

Huey's eyes widened in surprise. "It's just that I haven't seen you in a couple weeks, Fraser. It's nice to have you back."

"Oh. Well, yes... excuse me." Fraser stammered. He made his way over to Ray's desk and collapsed into the chair, burying his face in his hands.

This was torture. Every face he saw, he wondered if that was the person. He was reading much too much into even the most innocent comment. Ben sighed. He had been better off being repressed. He should have listened to his Grandmother.

Just then Detective Barry passed by Ray's desk. She was a new detective who had been transferred to the 27th about six weeks ago, and she had been flirting with Ben every time she saw him ever since.

"Oh!" She said in feigned surprise. "I didn't know you would be here. I stopped by to use Ray's phone. Six weeks here and they have yet to give me a telephone of my own. I'm forced to use the other detective's; although I do seem to use Detective Vecchio's more than anyone elses'."

Ben looked at her in dawning horror.

"Well, if you'll excuse me, I'll go use Detective Huey's." Smiling at him seductively, she walked away.

Ben let his head fall onto the stack of files on the desk and then just lay there. It could not possibly have been her. Right? If she had heard what Ben had said, she would have probably curtailed her flirting. Or maybe she just would have viewed it as more of a challenge. He groaned quietly.

The sound of footsteps approached the desk and stopped. "Hi, Benny."

"Hello, Ray." Ben said, not bothering to raise his head.

"Are these the files from the Consulate?"

"Yes they are."

"OK, thank you. Is there anything you'd like to discuss with me?"

"Not particularly, Ray."

"OK."

Ben sighed and sat up and looked at his lover. Just then Lt. Welsh burst out of his office and approached the desk. "Vecchio! Do you want to explain to me why I still do not have your report on the Young case despite my repeated and very reasonable requests for it?"

"I just wanted to make sure it was perfect, sir." Ray replied calmly. "Here it is." He handed Welsh the file.

"Why thank you so much, Detective. It's nice to see the tax payer's dollars put to such good use."

"Thank you sir." Vecchio smiled. "If you'll excuse me, I'm taking Benny to lunch now."

"Not before you go and get me the evidence report for this case, you're not." Welsh replied.

"Yes, sir." Ray sighed. "Hang on, Benny. I'll be right back."

"All right, Ray."

Ray headed across the office and Ben turned to smile at Lt. Welsh. "How are you today, sir?"

"I'm fine, Constable, thank you. I'd better get back to work, though."

"Of course." Ben smiled.

"One thing, though, Constable."

"Yes?"

"I don't wear silk boxers. I prefer cotton briefs." With a solemn wink, Welsh turned and walked calmly back into his office, closing the door behind him.

THE END

Comments always welcome!