Title: Shaggy Dog #2: Sailing Mort
Author: Marian 
Category: Humor/parody
Ratings/warnings: G.  If you hate puns, do not read this story.
Pairings: none
Spoilers: none
Disclaimers: The Due South Characters Belong to Alliance.
Teaser: A Shaggy Dog story is a long or short story ending with a, usually
painful, pun or joke.  This one involves Mort and boats.
Archive: Please archive.

Benton Fraser, RCMP was bringing a sample for Mort, the pathologist at
the 27th precinct, to analyze. Upon entering the lab he heard Mort singing.
Instead of his usual operatic songs Mort was singing a sea chantey.
"Pardon me Mort but could you check this...."
"Ah Fraser my boy come in, come in.  I was just singing because I was
looking forward to indulging hobby this weekend."
Fraser, knowing that often best to let Mort ramble, answered " What hobby
is that?" hoping this would allow Mort to finish this line of discussion
faster and then get to the matter Fraser wanted to discuss. "I love rigging
sailships.  Ahhh the ropes, the pulleys, the
satisfaction that a good rigging leads to a good sailing trip."
"I see. well if you could just look at this sample..."
"Unfortunately I have lost my rigging partner for this trip."
"Mort..."
"And I really can't do it alone."
"Mort"
"At my age, my joints get tired from working the ropes."
"Mort!"
"One really needs a good rigging to stand up against the winds of Lake
Michigan."
"MORT!" sighing heavily Fraser decided to indulge Mort. "If I agree to
go with you this weekend and help you with the rigging, would that facilitate
the identification of this sample?"
"Why, yes indeed it would Fraser. I'll have the results to you at the
end of today."
Writing down directions to where his boat was and handing the
paper to Fraser "Be here Saturday, 7:00 a.m. Thank you Fraser.

Fraser got the lab results from Mort and, true to his word, he helped
Mort with the rigging on Saturday.  He arrived, confident that he could
even teach Mort a thing or two about rigging courtesy of his RCMP training
in knot tying and rigging.

Monday arrived with Fraser waiting for his friend Ray Vecchio (actually
Stan Kowolski). Fraser appeared to be brooding.
"Hey Fraser, old buddy, I hear you went sailing with ol' Mort.  Didja
have a good time?"
"Yes Ray, I did.  But I also had a lesson in humility."
"Whadaya mean by that."
"I assumed that my training from the RCMP would be superior to the skills

of a pathologist, for whom rigging was merely a hobby."
"And?"
"Morts skills and dexterity were..."
Fraser paused, shifting uncomfortably.
"C'mon Fraze, out with it"
"I was good but.."
"But??"

"I'm not the rigger Mort is".

The end

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