Who: Vecchio/Kowalski

What: Have sex. Making this NC-17.

Where: In the due South world, which doesn't belong to me, but I'm hoping since I get nothing out of this except the satisfaction of a job well done the powers that be will be lenient.

When: The night before the phone conversation between Fraser and Vecchio that kicks off the beginning of season three.

Why: Because the good company at the Chicago House Party inspired me, so special thanks to Surfgirl, Misha, Hth, Elaine, Cheryl, Rupert, Jan, Karen, Shannon, LadyAnna, Tess, Amy, Hamlette, Shawn, and Jeannie Marie. If this makes happy, let me know at magik@socket.net

Full Disclosure

Barbara J. Webb

They never led me to believe it was going to be like looking in a mirror or anything, but - Christ - how could anyone look at this spiky-blonde bundle of nerves and think 'Ray Vecchio'? What's up with that? Doesn't look like me, doesn't act like me, doesn't talk like me. Crazy. This whole assignment is crazy. I should never have agreed to it.

Yes, yes I should have. Go. Get out. Before Fraser comes back. I have to leave - have to go. Why? Because I'm in love with my partner. Or, more to the point, because my partner doesn't love me.

But this guy - this guy - this sparkling, gorgeous man - who the hell ever looked at him and thought 'now, that's the man to become Ray Vecchio'?

They all say he's a good cop. Really good cop. In that shiny, pristine, golden boy sort of way that makes it hard to get along with other cops. And that's fine. Fraser'll think he's great, and he'll take good care of my Benny.

He'd better.

* * * * *

"So you were tied up, and this guy Bolt had a bomb attached to you." Kowalski scribbled more notes onto the file sheet and squinched his eyes shut. It was one of the more fascinating techniques of memorization Ray had ever witnessed.

"Right. The thing was set to go off if our heart-rates got up to this certain level. Naturally, Benny was panicking -"

"I don't have to call him 'Benny', do I? Cause that's kinda...uh...lame."

"No. In fact, I'd prefer that you didn't." If Kowalski wasn't going to appreciate the nick-name, Ray didn't want him getting it dirty.

"Good. Sounds like some kinda high school girl with a crush or something."

Ray was fairly certain his face betrayed neither the panic nor the hostility that comment had sent sparking through his body. "Can we just get back to cases here?"

"Sure."

* * * * *

I'd like to know who the first guy was looked at me and thought 'now there's a guy who'll make a great Ray Vecchio.' Cause I think he needs his head examined or something. I'm nothing like him, and anybody who ever even heard of him is gonna know it in a second. Just gotta keep hoping there's somebody here knows what he's doing.

Sure as hell isn't me.

Focus focus focus, Kowalski *focus*. All this stuff to learn. Gotta listen, remember, write down.

Stop looking at him. Gotta stop looking at him. Not here to look at him. Certainly not here to think those thoughts I think when I look at him. Bad Ray. Just cause Stella left me - just cause she left me doesn't mean I can screw around on the clock, staring at this cop I'm supposed to be learning to be and thinking thoughts that would probably send his testosterone-swelled macho-Italian head through the roof.

Weird assignment, but a chance to get away. Get away from thinking about Stella. Know I can't have her, but still don't want to know I can't have her. Miss her want her need her. Have to get away. Be Ray Vecchio. Fine. Ray Vecchio doesn't love Stella. Focus on that.

* * * * *

"Maria's my sister, and her husband's name is...um...."

"Tony."

"Right. And Francesca's my other sister." Ray leaned back in his chair, propping his feet up on the table right in front of Vecchio. "Okay, I think I've got this down."

Vecchio didn't look convinced. "Let's go through the family one more time."

Ray was fairly certain his brain had reached the limit of the information it could absorb in this sitting. "I got a better idea. Let's order a pizza or something."

"We don't have a lot of time here."

"You're not the one trying to learn an entire life in one sitting. I need a break." Without even thinking about it, Ray flashed Vecchio one of his best 'do it because I'm sexy' grins. Usually he knew better than to try that on a fellow cop, but it was late and his brain was slipping.

If Vecchio even noticed, he didn't seem upset. Just a little unfocused. "Fine. We'll take a break."

* * * * *

Life is so unfair. Here I am, getting shipped off to mafia central, and Benny gets partnered with this creature who just seems to ooze sex, and he'll never even notice. Much less appreciate it the way I could.

Course that's just what I need. Another guy around the precinct to lust after. As if Fraser weren't distracting enough.

No, the problem with Fraser isn't lust. I only wish it were that simple. But oh, I think Kowalski might have been a distraction - from Fraser, from work, from anything. If this little cram session has been any indication. All I can hope is that I'm making some sort of sense.

Benny, Benny. I'm going to miss you so much. But this is for the best. Please understand, this is all for the best.

* * * * *

"We'd be a lot more comfortable back at my place."

"What?" Ray was fairly certain he hadn't jumped high enough to hit the ceiling, but Kowalski was giving him an odd enough look he was pretty sure he'd at least twitched funny.

"Back at my place. You know, real chairs and stuff. Come on, Vecchio, you can't actually *want* to spend the rest of the night here."

True, the interrogation room of the 27 wasn't the most comfortable place in the world, but Ray was afraid Kowalski's place might be a little too comfortable. At least, if Ray had his way....

"Sure, Kowalski. Whatever." This was a professional meeting, not a pick-up party, and Ray *was* going to stay on track, whether they stayed at the precinct or they were at Kowalski's place with Kowalski dancing around in his underwear.

"Cool."

Ray could only hope he wasn't grinning like a fiend as that last thought lingered in his head.

* * * * *

Good going, Kowalski. Sounded just like a pick-up line or something. No wonder he's jumpy. Probably been drooling all over him. Those eyes. They're so...so...green. Be a lot more comfortable back at my place. That's just great.

Quick inventory of the situation, before you go getting yourself in any more trouble. Haven't had sex since the divorce, so you're ultra-horn-dog. Fine. This Vecchio, he's an attractive guy just spent the last six hours with and going for seven. Fine. He's also a cop. Not so fine anymore. Probably not just straight, but really-fucking-fag-bashing-cop-straight.

Gotta pull it in. Gotta pull it in. Work to do.

* * * * * *

"I can't believe he actually did that." Taking another long pull at his beer, Ray settled in deeper into the overstuffed chair. "This guy sounds like a nut."

"That's Benny for you."

"So what's it really like, working with him an all?"

The corners of Ray's lips spread into an almost pensive smile. "There's no way I can describe it. You'll just have to figure that one out for yourself."

"You like him a lot."

"He's been my partner and best friend for over two years. Yeah, I like him a lot."

Ray had no idea what could possibly be making Vecchio so defensive all of a sudden. "Look, I was just asking a question, okay? Don't need to yell at me."

"I wasn't yelling."

Italian men and their Italian tempers. It was flashy. It was sexy. "Just sounds like he gets you in a lot of trouble."

"Yeah. But I always manage to get him out of it."

* * * * *

Does he have any idea how he's looking at me? Straight guys don't watch each other like that, don't notice, don't trace men's bodies with their eyes the way he's been doing for the last half hour. I know it's late and all, but I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining this.

I must be some sort of Fraser-level lunatic to be thinking about jumping - not just a cop - but the cop who's going to be keeping my secret, protecting my family, my friends...me. If he's not 100% grade-a-okay with this, life gets real complicated. Isn't my life hard enough as it is? Do I have to go throwing one more potential problem into the mix?

Potential. Right. Like any possible problem in the life of Ray Vecchio isn't going to turn into a full scale crisis.

Screw it. Just sex, right? One-nighter before I haul ass to Vegas.

Cause no straight guy would let his eyes stay that long on my crotch, and no gay guy has the right to look that good, come on to me that hard, and expect to get away with it.

* * * * *

"You still with me, Kowalski?"

The pretty blonde head snapped up from where it had been drooping, and the iridescent eyes regained some focus. "Yeah, I'm listening."

"No you're not. I think maybe we've reached the limits of what you can absorb in one day."

"Guess the rest I'm going to have to get from your notes."

"Guess so." Ray stood up, stretched, moved to stand next to Kowalski where he sat sprawled in his chair. "Although, there is one more thing you should probably know."

Letting out a long groan, Kowalski rolled his eyes up to meet Ray's. "C'mon, Vecchio. Can't you just e-mail it to me or something?"

"No, this is important. In case you have to deal with any exes of mine."

"Fine. Lay it on me."

"Don't act shocked or anything when some of my exes turn out to be men."

If Ray had timed it better, he could probably have gotten Kowalski to spit out half his beer. As it was, the guy nearly choked. "You're - you - you telling me you're gay?"

"No," Ray grinned. "I'm telling you you're gay."

* * * * *

....

* * * * *

"You still with me, Kowalski?"

"Sure. Right. With you. So I'm - you're - right. Well, that's just great." Ray's brain was still whirling too fast to put forth any coherent thought.

Vecchio took a couple steps forward, so his thighs were pressing against Ray's arm where it hung over the arm of the chair. "So you think you got this all under control?"

It was impossible to keep his eyes from creeping up Vecchio's leg from where his hand made a wrinkle in the otherwise impeccable line of Vecchio's trousers, across the loose-cut line of his crotch, up the soft-looking silk of Vecchio's shirt, to finally rest in the depths of Vecchio's emerald green eyes. "What, you don't think I can handle it?"

"I don't know. If you've got any last questions - any clarifications or specifics you need, now is the time to ask. Pointers, maybe?"

"Pointers." The words were slowly beginning to sink through Ray's frozen brain. "You mean, like...uh...final advice on how to be Ray Vecchio?"

"Full disclosure, Kowalski. I want to make sure you know everything there is to know about me."

Ray pushed himself out of the chair, stood up so close to Vecchio their chests were nearly touching. Vecchio didn't step back. "Maybe I do got a couple more questions."

* * * * *

The heat coming off this guy is incredible. What right has anybody got to be that fucking hot? And he's not saying no. Not that I figured he would. Not the way he was looking at me.

Nothing like he's looking at me right now. Could cook an egg in the steam he's putting off. And it's all gonna be wasted on Fraser. He might as well get as much good out of it as he can tonight - once he starts living my life, the sex quotient goes down immeasurably.

But now - right now - there's no one else in the room but him and me, and he's got some curiosity brewing about Ray Vecchio, the man, the myth, the legend. Good for him. We'll see if I can give him something that'll keep his mind on the joy of being me.

* * * * *

"A couple more questions, huh?" The cotton of Kowalski's t-shirt slid smoothly through Ray's fingers as he drew his hand up Kowalski's chest. "Like what?"

"Like, uh, you know...what you're like - or, I guess, what I'm like in bed."

"Good question." Continuing its upward direction, Ray's hand moved through Kowalski's spiky hair. "Excellent question."

Kowalski's voice sank in pitch, became throaty, sultry. "Important things to know. How do you take it, Vecchio? You like it up the ass, down the throat? Tell me how you like to do it."

"Better yet; how bout I show you?"

* * * * *

Oh yeah, show me show me show me. Show me what if feels like to be you - show me what it will be like to feel you. To touch you, to feel you, to make sure I'm not just imagining this.

Something outta a porno or something. Here this guy I just met today - this guy I'm gonna be - gonna do - gonna be. Not Stella - definitely not Stella. I'm gonna be having sex with somebody not Stella. A guy who's really not Stella. Green eyes, as tall as me, a shirt that shade of orange Stella would never touch. And, sure, cause I'm gonna be him so I gotta know what it's like to be him to be with him to feel him to know him in the biblical sense.

His hands. Oh man, those hands. Those fingers. Like sending sparks through my hair or something. And those sleepy green eyes.

* * * * *

Ray tilted his head into Vecchio's touch as the Italian traced his fingers up the bottom edge of Ray's scalp. "You just show me anything you think is portentous."

"Portentous?"

Ray tried to kick his brain back in line. Port-part-pert "Pertinent. That's what I meant."

"Okay." Giving in to the pressure on the back of his head, Ray leaned in to meet Vecchio's lips.

* * * * *

Jesus. I know I don't kiss like that. If I did, I'm sure someone would have mentioned it before. Like every inch of that sexy body is all focused right here against my lips. Like every sensation of mine is being dragged into that same spot. I don't think I could pull away if I wanted to.

Not saying I want to.

I can tell he doesn't want to either. His fingers are digging into my arms so hard I know there's going to be marks tomorrow.

Pulling at my clothes - he's pulling at my clothes. No, no, no - going to lose a button....

That's better. Slower. And I still can't pull away from this kiss.

* * * * *

Clothes hit the floor in a tangled pile of Kowalski and Vecchio. On almost any other day, Ray would have objected to the treatment of his silk and wool, but tonight life was too short. His last night in Chicago and damned if he was going to let a few wrinkles distract him from the blonde under his hands.

Instead, he pushed Kowalski back down into the chair, falling on top of him. Warm skin pressed against warm skin. The thick, bristly hairs of Kowalski's inner thigh scratched against the hyper-sensitive skin of Ray's cock. Kowalski's chin pressed almost uncomfortably against Ray's neck, and then shifted to be replaced by the soft warmth of Kowalski's lips over Ray's Adam's apple.

"You taking notes here?"

"Oh yeah." Kowalski's teeth scratched against Ray's throat as he talked, sending electric shivers up Ray's neck. "Paying super-close attention."

If more undercover assignments started out like this, everyone would want to be a cop. Kowalski's solid thighs rippled under Ray's hands as he pulled the blonde more firmly against him. Tilting his head over, Ray sucked Kowalski's earlobe into his mouth. "What have you got around here that'll pass for lube so I can fuck that pretty ass?"

* * * * *

Shit shit shit. Gotta have something. Condoms, lube - not prepared for this. No...no...yes! Bedroom. Bedroom. Gotta find gotta find.

Still feel his hands on me. So good - too long since I did this. Divorce...Stella...too long, not long enough. Not going to think about her not going to think about anything but bright green eyes and Ray Vecchio. Sex with Ray Vecchio, and then I'm going to be Ray Vecchio and its gonna be weird but don't care because it's been way too long since I've - found it.

Looks good - looks so good just sitting in the chair, all naked. There's a naked man in my apartment, and he's not me. Never had a non-me naked man in the apartment and that's okay because it's pretty good now and maybe gonna have to try this again sometime - naked men in my apartment. Working out real well so far. Looking really good.

Gonna fuck me - he's gonna fuck me and that's fine that's cool. Not gonna look nervous, like some stupid geek boy who's never done it before or anything. Not gonna look like that. Just play it cool, and everything'll be great. Everybody does it - well, maybe not everybody, but plenty people so can't be that hard, right? Just not going to look stupid. Gotta play it cool.

Shit. Window.

* * * * *

Ray stopped in front of the arc of windows, all sitting with the shades wide open. "We should move into the bedroom."

With the grace of a cat, Vecchio was on his feet. "Why's that?"

Ray twitched his head towards the windows. "Cause anyone can see us."

And then Vecchio was behind him, erection pressed against the crack of Ray's ass, one arm wrapped around Ray's stomach. "So they can." Leaning his head down, Vecchio pressed wet kisses along the line of Ray's shoulder. "And I can see you, too."

Darkness from the streets outside combined with the lights within the apartment had turned the glass of the window into a mirror, making it impossible for Ray to see if anyone was outside witnessing this display. "Come on, Vecchio."

But instead of moving, Vecchio simply slid his hand down to wrap around the base of Ray's cock, the sudden sensation making Ray's legs buckle. He slid down to his knees, pulling Vecchio with him. On his knees, the reflection cut off mid thigh - just low enough this lurid scene was still completely visible from outside.

* * * * *

Somehow, I don't think he has any idea what he's getting himself into. You wanted to know what it was like to be Ray Vecchio - time for your first lesson, Kowalski. No middle of the road, average, boring sex for me, thank you very much. Not with someone as pretty as you. I want to watch every inch of you while I fuck you, see your face, your dick, your body move with me. This spot works just fine for me, and if anybody's watching - good for them. Nothing for you to be ashamed of, detective Kowalski.

Squirmy little bugger. Not so sure of this. That's fine. I'm sure, and that's what counts. Cause, remember, this is all about me. You wanted to know, and now you're going to get what you wanted. Sexy little pretty-boys should watch what they ask for.

God, Benny, if only it could have been you here instead.

But not you, not with me. Not ever. You've got your own problems, and that's fine, cause I've sure as hell got mine. Doesn't stop me from wishing, from imagining. From leaving.

Your new partner - your new *me* and I'm going to fuck him good because he's hot and he's gorgeous and he's willing.

And mostly because I'll never do this to you.

* * * * *

Kowalski was tight - very tight as Ray pressed into him, but he wasn't trying to pull away. Ray stroked Kowalski's erection, whispered into his ear, "Relax, Ray. Don't get all tense on me now."

There was a hint of relaxation, but on the whole, Kowalski's body stayed rigid, eyes screwed shut, legs locked in place. "Open your eyes, Kowalski; look at me." When the blond started to turn his head, Ray took him by the chin and pulled his face around to stare at the window. "Look into the mirror. Look at us. Look at yourself."

There was no denying it was a pretty picture they made, and Ray half hoped there was someone outside getting to appreciate this. Kowalski's golden body arched back against Ray; the crown of his cock gleamed wetly in Ray's hand; his wide liquid eyes were locked on their image in the window. And while from the window you couldn't directly see that Kowalski's body was currently impaled on Ray's dick, it was fairly obvious to anyone with a brain in his head what they were doing.

This was an image Ray wanted to burn into his head to bring with him to Vegas.

* * * * *

Yes, yes, this is - oh, God yes - so good - fuck me - fuck yeah.

Right here. Right in front of the window. Anybody could see. Can't see. Out. Can't see out. Just see me. And him. Him inside me. Can't see that, but can see his hand, his face, his eyes - those eyes - so fucking good.

Watching - never watched like this - he's watching me. His eyes, in the window, on me, all over me. So damn hot. Can't look - can't look away.

Ray fucking Vecchio. Or would it be Vecchio fucking Ray? His face, my face, reflection in the mirror. Good thing we did this, cause I don't know if I would have believed this just reading it in a file. Not that this is the kind of thing you put in a file.

Just staring at me. Like his eyes are putting off heat - can feel them on me, hot. Hot - good - so good - so hot. Fuck me fuck me - yes.

* * * * *

Ray braced himself with one hand against the window to keep from falling against it as Vecchio's thrusts became more solid, deeper. With the other, he covered Vecchio's hand where it pumped his cock, guiding it to an even better rhythm. His entire body was starting to look shiny in the reflection, slick with sweat.

* * * * *

Golden and gorgeous. Ray Kowalski soon to be Ray Vecchio. My life you're taking, my job, my Mountie, my dick up your ass. Hot, deep, body in the window with me, not me, going to be me.

Mine, right now, all mine. Later, me, but now mine. Around me against me. Hot, slick, panting, sexy. Close, so close - want this to last - last taste of Chicago - last night of being me, of fucking me. Fucking him.

Feel this, feel me, know me. As much me as possible, so some part of me, some taste or scent or touch still stays in Chicago, near Benny. Stay near - need to stay near - need to get away. Keep some bit of Ray Vecchio near him while I'm far away.

Gorgeous in the window, straining and thrusting - ready - so close - so good.

* * * * *

Kowalski came first, his semen splattering against the glass, with Ray's orgasm rushing through him only a few seconds after. Ray fell back onto his heels, pulling Kowalski down with him into his lap.

For only a moment, they were still, and then Kowalski was pulling away, bouncing to his feet. "I gotta - um, I gotta...."

"Yeah, me too." Given a moment to think about it, Ray's knees were starting to complain about having been subjected to the hardwood floor. Standing was a bit of a stiff process, but he promised his legs plenty of pampering once he was a mafia chieftain. "You think you're going to be okay - good with being me?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'll be good."

Ray gathered his clothes - dammit, they *had* wrinkled - and assembled on himself what was necessary for the sake of decency walking the streets of Chicago. Still hovering, Kowalski watched him. "Good luck with Vegas."

"You too. Don't screw my life up too bad."

"Right. I'll try."

As he left, Ray looked up one more time to Kowalski's window. The living room lamps had been turned off, but in the light spilling out from the bedroom, Ray could see Kowalski's shadowy shape in the window looking down at him. One last wave at the man who would be him, and then Vecchio got in his car and drove away.