Author's disclaimer: Standard
Author's notes: Constructive criticism always welcome. Please let me know what you think.
Disclaimer: Benton Fraser, Ray Vecchio and the other folks you normally see hanging out at the 27th Precinct are property of Alliance. Bailey Malone and all the other folks you normally see hanging out at the VCTF office in Atlanta are property of NBC. All other characters are mine. No infringement of any copyrights is intended. This story is written for the private enjoyment of Due South fans and not for monetary profit. Permission to use this story for profit is not given.
Rated: PG-13
Feedback: welcomed; craved even
Timeline: Mid Season Two/Expanded Universe
Spoilers: Juliet is Bleeding, Victoria's Secret & Heaven & Earth
Title: A Debt to Repay
Dr. Abigail Barnes sat in the tiny space that Emory University called an office grading mid-term exams. Several months ago she had returned to Atlanta and formally resigned from her position with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. She had gone in to the Violent Crimes Task Force office to say good-bye to everyone. She knew it would be a tear-filled farewell but she didn't expect to see tears in the eyes of the teammates she was leaving. Even Bailey looked a little misty eyed as she hugged him. She spent quite a while talking to Dr. Samantha Waters, the new profiler. She and Abbey were as different as chalk and cheese but Abbey knew that after the initial trial period, Sam would fit well with the team. They'd just have to get used to each other.
Her final surprise had come when Bailey stopped her just before she walked out the door. He handed her an envelope.
"I know departmental procedures require that we only confirm dates of employment on reference checks. But I want you to have this letter of recommendation from me. And if you ever find yourself in need of anything at all, please call me."
Abbey could feel herself getting weepy again as she hugged her now former boss. "Thanks Bailey. This really means a lot to me."
"I still wish you weren't going. Are you sure you won't stay on leave for a little while longer and let me fight this for you."
"No Bailey. This is a good time to leave. Chicago made me realize that I need to take a good hard look at my life and figure out where I'm going. And you've got a good replacement for me."
"No one can replace you, Abbey. You're one of a kind."
"And we must thank God for small miracles," she laughed.
Sauntering off, she felt lighter of spirit than she had in a long time.
Two weeks later she had received a call from the Chief of the Atlanta Police Department. A well-liked and respected professor at Emory University had been abducted, raped and murdered. A suspect was in custody but he had what appeared to be an airtight alibi. Abbey was asked to come in to see if she could determine the veracity of the man's story. After additional questioning of the suspect and the friend who was vouching for him, Abbey was certain they were lying and pointed the police in another direction to find other indications to back up the forensic evidence they already had.
It was that case that had led Abbey to apply for the dead professor's job. She felt a little ghoulish doing it but a girl had to make a living somehow. She wondered if they would have given her the job if she hadn't helped bring the killer to trial. After all, even with her Ph.D. she had no teaching experience. But now here she was teaching three classes and spending ten hours a week working in the student counseling center.
She stared down at the paper before her, red pen in hand automatically making notes in the margin. One question on anti-social personality disorder seemed to have given all her students problems. She re-read the question wondering if she had worded it poorly. She understood what she meant. Perhaps they hadn't covered the material well enough in class. Nothing she could do about it now but make a note to go over it again after spring break.
Spring break, a week away from work. A vacation. When she had left Ray nearly nine months ago, she had promised him they'd take a vacation together. But so far, it had never come to pass. The pledge weighed on her. She had never made a promise she didn't intend to keep. She always paid her debts and she owed Ray her life, literally. It was his life force she grabbed onto to keep her alive all the way to the hospital. And it was his life force that he willingly shared to bring her back from the brink of death in the Intensive Care Unit of the hospital. That was another debt she owed him and it bothered her even more than the vacation.
They had spoken briefly and intermittently over the phone during the intervening months. He had wanted her to spend Christmas with him in Chicago but she declined. Christmas was a time for family and as much as she loved the Vecchio's they weren't hers. More than anything she wanted to go to Champaign and visit her own family though she knew that wouldn't be possible. And in the end, she spent the day with George Fraley, her old buddy from the VCTF who was also without a family.
Though she made excuses about not wanting to be in Chicago in the winter, she knew what was keeping her away, the thought that Ray wanted more from her than she could give him. The night they'd made love in her hotel room, they had touched each other's souls. In retrospect, she almost wished it hadn't happened. For although it had allowed her to find that energy source in him that had saved her life, it had brought him too close to her. Realistically speaking, it was an experience she wouldn't trade for anything in the world. But now she had to live in the aftermath of that earth shattering moment and what it had done to them. She shook her head not knowing what to do about it.
Abbey put down her pen and closed her eyes letting her head drop to her chest. Her hand automatically went to the crucifix Ray had hung around her neck just before she boarded the plane that had separated them. His 'good luck charm' is what he had called it. Said it had always kept him safe.
**A city street at night appeared before her eyes. A car was parked along the curb, an older model car, hard to see in the limited light but it appeared to be green. A man walked up to the driver's side door. Another man running in the street wearing an oddly shaped hat. He yelled something but she couldn't understand the words. The man opened the door and the car, Ray's car, exploded into a fireball.**
Abbey's head snapped up and she dropped her hand from the necklace as if it had burned her. She immediately picked up the phone and called her friend in Chicago. The police department said he was not on duty that day so she tried his cell phone. It immediately went to voicemail. 'This is Ray Vecchio, you know the drill, leave a message at the beep.'
"Ray, this is Abbey. I know it's been a while since we've talked but I was sitting here thinking about you and our pending vacation and I had one of my hunches that we need to talk. Not about vacation, but about you. Please call me back as soon as you get this message. My cell phone is on and I'm waiting for your call."
In down town Chicago four men and a wolf in a 1971 Buick Riviera pulled up in front of Pat Scarpetta's restaurant. Ray Vecchio, his friend, RCMP Constable Benton Fraser, and fellow detectives Jack Huey and Louis Gardino were celebrating Ray's promotion to Detective First Grade. Though the salary increase was minimal, it still required a celebration. Pat Scarpetta, himself, met them at the door... and tried to turn them away. Scanning the occupants of the room, Ray saw why. His old nemesis from the neighborhood, Frank Zuko had virtually taken over the facility for a birthday party. But Ray remained adamant that Pat stick to his agreement not to play favorites and soon, after an appeal to Zuko himself, the officers were seated at a small out of the way table.
The treatment irritated Ray who was a long time patron of Pat's. And it especially angered him because of his long time feud with Zuko. He scanned the party looking at the revelers when his gaze stopped on a familiar face, Irene, Frank's younger sister and his long lost love. He thought of Abbey for a moment, but she had been dodging him ever since she had returned to Atlanta. Somewhere deep in his heart he knew that she would never be his but it hadn't stopped him from trying. Now, as he saw the woman he'd loved so long ago, the woman Abbey had helped him be with, he felt a desire stirring in him that he thought was long forgotten.
In Atlanta Abbey worried all evening. In desperation she called the FBI field office in Chicago looking for information but found none. She made more calls to Ray's cell phone but got his voicemail. Finally she called his family's house. Fighting to keep the panic out of her voice, she casually asked if Ray was available. Mrs. Vecchio told her where Ray and his friend's had gone and suggested she call his cell phone. Abbey didn't want to worry Ray's mom so she said she'd do that. The last phone call she made was to Scarpetta's restaurant. Unfortunately, there had been a brawl in the establishment and the participants had been hauled away to the police station. Abbey didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
Abbey turned on the television at 11:00 that night. Flipping the channel to WGN she hoped to catch the news report and see what was going on in the Windy City. Her worst fears were confirmed when the lead story was of a police officer being killed in a car bombing. And then the words she dreaded to hear, 'the name of the victim is being with held pending notification of the family'.
Abbey collapsed on the floor of her condo, grief stricken sobs wracking her body. When her phone rang, it was all she could do to drag herself to the receiver to pick it up.
"Hello?" she said, her voice rough with checked pain.
"Abbey? It's George. Are you okay?"
Realizing who it was, she let her tears flow and tried to speak but words choked in her throat.
"Abbey, I'm on my way over."
"No, George. Don't come," she replied but he had already severed the connection. She dropped the phone and continued to cry.
Fifteen minutes later she heard her doorbell ring. She tried to pull herself together enough to answer it but succeed only in releasing the locks and letting George enter on his own. It took several minutes of just letting her vent her sorrow and guilt on his shoulder before he could finally talk to her.
"Okay, kiddo, start at the beginning. What happened."
"I was in my office this afternoon, grading papers and thinking about Ray; thinking about how I still owed him that vacation I promised him we'd take. And I had this vision of him walking to his car and his Mountie friend standing in the street yelling something at him. And when he got to the car, it blew up. I was just watching the Chicago TV station and they confirmed that a police detective was killed in a car bombing just outside the 27th precinct station."
"And you think it's your friend."
"Of course I do. I saw it happen."
"But did you see his face? Are you sure it's him?"
"Who else would be getting in his car? The Mountie was in the street."
"Look, why don't you call him?"
"I called the station when I had the vision, they said he was off duty. I've left messages on his voice mail."
"Okay, why don't you call his family?"
"At a time like this? Are you crazy?"
"Look, you still don't know for sure that it was him. If nothing else, call the station. There's got to be somebody there who remembers you and will give you some answers."
With shaky hands, Abbey picked up the phone from where she'd dropped it earlier and punched in the number to the phone on Ray's desk.
"Squad room. Elaine Besbriss speaking."
"Is Detective Vecchio there please?" Abbey asked.
"Just a moment," the civilian aid responded hesitantly.
"Oh God," Abbey whispered unconsciously fingering the crucifix that hung from her neck.
"Vecchio," the voice announced.
"Oh thank God, you're alive." Fresh tears flowed down Abbey's face.
"What are you doing calling me here?"
The tears continued as a white-hot anger flare through her.
"Well pardon me for giving a damn if you live or die, you selfish bastard."
The problem with cordless phones, Abbey thought, was that there was no way to satisfactorily slam down the receiver to end the connection. She simply had to content herself with pushing a button to disconnect. Still her anger was at a boiling point and she needed to vent. She flew around the living room, grabbing throw pillows and hurling them in every direction. After five solid minutes of this activity she finally wore herself out and dropped to the couch, exhausted.
In Chicago Constable Benton Fraser looked at his best friend with one eyebrow quirked.
"And that was?" he asked as Ray hung up the phone.
"Abbey in some kind of a snit because I'm still alive."
"Understood."
In reality, he didn't understand. When he had returned from Canada, Ray had been in a very upbeat mood and willing to share the story of the serial murderer that he had helped capture with Abbey's assistance. Though Ray was discreet and never mentioned their tryst, Fraser could tell that there was more to Abbey and Ray's relationship than his friend had mentioned. There was a very deep and intense bond between them. He also knew that Abbey's alienation had hurt his friend badly. From everything that Ray had said about the woman, Fraser couldn't fathom that she would simply walk away from their relationship without reason. But he knew that Ray didn't put much stock in his understanding of the ways of women. And after Victoria, he could understand why.
"Vecchio, in my office," Lt. Welch bellowed.
George rummaged through Abbey's kitchen cabinets until he found a box of teabags. Tossing one in a cup, he poured boiling water over it and spooned in a liberal amount of sugar. For many mornings, he'd seen her make herself a cup of tea to start her day at the office and he knew just how she liked it; hot, strong and sweet. Putting a saucer under the mug, he carried the drink into the living room and put it on the coffee table in front of his friend.
"Feel like talking about it?" he asked.
Two days ago, Abbey would have swallowed glass shards before she would have talked to anyone about her feelings for Ray. But now she was just too tired to keep that wall up around her heart. And she knew she could count on George to be objective and yet supportive. So the whole story came out in bits and pieces over several cups of tea.
"So now what?" he asked her.
"Now, I slink off to my den to lick my wounds."
"Abbey, can I convince you to look at this from Ray's point of view?"
She looked at him skeptically.
"Just hear me out. The guy hasn't heard from you in over a month. Right now he's just seen his car blow up and someone killed. Be a police officer again for just a minute. You know that bomb was meant for Ray. And he knows it too. As devastatingly beautiful and mesmerizing as you are, I'm sure you were the last person on his mind at the moment you called. I doubt it even occurred to him that you had a vision let alone that you've got cable TV and know what's going on in Chicago. He's going through a really bad time right now and he doesn't need one of his oldest and closest friends giving him grief over a tiny faux pas on his part."
Abbey sighed. "Yeah, you're probably right. Hey, maybe you should be the psychology professor and I'll find another line of work."
"Not me. I can't teach that psycho stuff."
"Neither can I from what I've seen of my students' mid-term exams."
A few hours later, Abbey was yawning mightily and losing the battle to stay awake. George bundled her off to bed and then spent the night in her guest room. Sleep was not restful for Abbey. Nightmares of the explosion replayed in her mind. When the phone rang at 6:00 a.m. she was already awake.
"Hello?"
"May I speak to Dr. Barnes, please?"
"This is Abbey," she replied rolling over on her back.
"This is Constable Benton Fraser, RCMP. I'm a friend of Ray Vecchio."
"I know who you are. Ray's told me a lot about you."
"And I've heard about you as well."
"What can I do for you Constable?"
"Please, call me Ben. I'm very worried about Ray."
"Well, that makes two of us. But at least as far as I'm concerned, he doesn't seem to care. I hope he's treating you better."
"I can't say that he is. But he's very distraught right now and I don't believe he's thinking clearly. He's out to avenge Louis' death and he won't listen to reason."
"Louis?" she asked suddenly making the identification of the dead officer. "Detective Gardino? Is that who was killed?"
"Yes, he was going to retrieve his coat from Ray's car. I saw someone walking away from the scene just before it happened but couldn't get Louis' attention in time to stop him."
Now, the vision made more sense. "Oh Ben, how awful. I'm so sorry to hear all of this. How are you coping?"
"In my usual fashion. But I really think Ray needs our help."
"Our help?"
"Yes, he's convinced he knows who the killer is and he's going after him as soon as the warrant arrives."
"And how do you think I can help?"
"He's going after Frank Zuko."
Abbey thought about this for a moment. From what she'd learned during her brief stay in Chicago last summer, Zuko had taken over his father's 'business'. She didn't get much information since she wasn't there to investigate organized crime, but with what she did know, he would be a likely suspect.
"Well Ben, Ray may be on to something. When I was in the Windy City last year, I heard a brief run down on Zuko's operations. I wouldn't put it past him to have a hit put out on Ray but I also know he wouldn't do it without provocation. Not that it takes much to provoke Frankie. But still, he does have his limits. Anything you can think of that would set him off?"
"As a matter of fact, there is. Tonight at the restaurant, there was an altercation between one of Zuko's associates and Ray that escalated into an all out brawl."
"Par for the course. What started it?"
Fraser ran one thumb across his brow. He wasn't sure just how he was going to tell this woman he'd never met that his best friend had found another woman.
"Um, well, it seems that Irene Zuko was at the restaurant and she danced with Ray just before the altercation."
Abbey felt like she'd been punched in the gut but she kept her voice neutral, not knowing just how much Fraser knew about her romp with Ray. "Irene? She's back in town? How is she?"
"Well, she appears to be fine but I don't think that's the problem. It seems that Ray is infatuated with her and her brother takes exception to this."
"Yes, I'm sure he does. It's interesting though. Frank's a lunatic but I find it difficult to think that he'd resort to a car bombing for just one dance."
Fraser's face was beginning to flush and he found himself stammering his next sentence.
"Well, they did... that is to say their lips... and he..."
"He kissed her."
"That would be correct."
"Hmm. Still not like Frank unless he's changed dramatically since last I knew him.
"But what does any of this have to do with me?"
"Ray told me that you have a rather strong sense of intuition and I was wondering if you could or even would use it to help out here."
"I see." She thought for a moment if Ray had told him the extent of her intuition. "Do you know if Ray had checked his cell phone voicemail?"
"I don't know."
"Well, yesterday I left him several messages. My intuition told me that he was in mortal danger and since he didn't call me back to find out what was going on, I can only suppose he doesn't put much stock in it."
Fraser wasn't sure how to answer that. "What exactly did you intuition tell you?"
"That his car was going to explode and he was going to be standing next to it when it happened and you would witness it. Two out of three ain't bad as the song says. In fact most baseball players would be impressed with a .666 average. But I guess Ray wasn't."
"Dr. Barnes, I'm sure that if Ray had gotten your message he would have responded to it or at least acted on it. But like you, I'm not convinced that Frank Zuko would have taken such a risk as to plant a bomb in Ray's car while it was parked right outside police headquarters."
"Constable, I'm not in the profiling business any more. And if I were, I'd have to have more information on Zuko to make any kind of a professional opinion. I can only say this from what I know of him and what I heard when I was in your fair city last year. If Frank were mad at Ray for makin' time with his sister, he would have taken it out on Ray in a different fashion. It's a private matter and would have been taken care of privately and quietly. I'm thinking something more like a hit man shooting Ray in a dark alley. Frank's private life is just that. He only grandstands when it's business related."
"Thank you Dr. Barnes. You've been a great help."
"Please, call me Abbey. And if you need anything else, let me know. Ray and Irene are my friends. I'll do whatever I have to keep them safe."
"Thank you kindly, Abbey. If your... intuition should tell you anything else, would you please contact me either at the precinct or the Canadian Consulate?"
"I'll let you know immediately. Take care of yourself Ben. And keep an eye on Ray for me? When it comes to Frank Zuko, he has a big blind spot."
"So I've noticed. I will. Good bye."
"Good bye."
Abbey groaned as she rolled over and replaced the phone on her nightstand. Looking up, she noticed George standing in her doorway.
"God, I hope I didn't wake you up," she apologized.
"Nah. I'm an early riser. You wanna go out and get some breakfast?"
"Sure. Let me get some clothes on. And George?"
"Yeah?"
"Thanks for everything. Your friendship means a lot to me."
"Same here."
Abbey went through the motions of work that day. Fortunately, there was no one scheduled to see her at the counseling center so she spent the time trying to work the case from a thousand miles away. That night she watched the Chicago TV station looking for news of the car bombing. George had promised to search all his sources for more information on Zuko and any other leads. What she saw on the television didn't please her. Zuko had been arrested and was still in custody. He was without an alibi for the time of the bombing and it didn't look like the judge was willing to be lenient on the issue of bail. Abbey shook her head, certain that Zuko was innocent for the first time in his life.
Wednesday night she watched the news report the funeral of Detective Louis Gardino. She thought about the man she'd slammed into a wall less than five minutes after they'd been introduced. In truth, he wasn't a bad officer, fairly competent by some standards. He'd just made the mistake of underestimating her. He had, after all, been instrumental in bringing Steve Boatright in for questioning. It was a painful experience to find out that no one had thought to pat the guy down to check for a weapon before sticking him in an interrogation room but she had lived to tell the tale. And while she was in the hospital recovering, he had come to visit her almost as frequently as Ray had.
By Thursday Abbey was almost back to normal. She had only two students scheduled to visit her in the counseling center. Both were freshman and feeling overwhelmed by all the demands made on them by their instructors, friends, and themselves. She was scheduled to leave at 3:00 p.m. but a student showed up just before then asking to speak with a counselor. Since she didn't have any plans for the evening Abbey agreed to stay.
Her first impression was how much the girl reminded her of Irene when they were in high school. She had dark eyes and dark hair cut in a layered shag style just as Irene had. Her voice was soft and without the southern drawl that Abbey was used to hearing from most of the students. This girl's accent was distinctly northern; New York, most likely.
Within minutes of talking to Sophie, Abbey felt alarm bells ringing in her mind. She knew this student was dangerously close to suicide, even if she didn't admit it. Abbey kept tight control on her own emotions trying not to be overwhelmed by the sadness that poured forth from this girl.
An hour later, Abbey felt like she had gotten her past the initial crisis but recommended that the girl seek on going counseling to deal with her many issues. As she sat at the desk and made her notes on the computer, she thought about Irene. Sophie and Irene had some commonalities in their backgrounds. She wondered about Irene. Ray had told her that the former Miss Zuko was had married and moved away from Illinois. What was she doing back in Chicago? She must have gotten a divorce. Ray might irritate Frankie with his desire for Irene but he wasn't stupid enough to get mixed up with a married woman.
In truth, Abbey just didn't have enough information to understand what was truly going on. She wanted to envy Irene but knew too much for that. For all Ray's declarations of love she knew that there would never be a union between the two of them as long as Ray was a cop. Irene would always be under her brother's thumb just as she had been under her father's. She thought about calling Irene, just to say hi and see what was going on but decided against it.
Abbey sat back in her chair and swiveled it side to side. She began to clasp Ray's crucifix and then thought better of it. Instead, she closed her eyes and tried to figure out what was going on in Chicago.
The beeping of the phone made her eyes pop open. She picked up the receiver and pressed the intercom button.
"Yes?" she answered.
"Dr. Barnes, you have a call from George Fraley on line two."
"Thank you, Stephanie."
She pushed the button next to the blinking arrow on her telephone.
"This is Abbey."
"Abbey, sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you. Things have been kinda nuts here. Anyway, I got that information you wanted on Frank Zuko. It's not good."
"Okay, I'm braced."
"Well, he was implicated but never charged in the bombing of the Cordero brothers several years ago. The bomber went to jail but they could never get him to roll over on Zuko. However the bomber's out of jail now and available for hire."
"Hmm, the Cordero brothers. Any indication as to motive?"
"Well, the bomber wouldn't say. However scuttlebutt on the street had it that they'd stiffed Zuko in a deal and he ordered a hit. Killed the Corderos and two little girls sleeping in the next room. That was one hell of a pipe bomb."
"I'd say. No other links with him and bombs?"
"None."
"Okay. Thanks, George. I'll talk to you later."
"See ya Abbey."
She released the connection and resumed her ruminations. George had pretty much confirmed her suspicions. For business purposes Frank Zuko would resort to a bomb. It made a statement to others who might try to cross him, not to try. But for a private conflict, that would be too much. He was psychotic but not stupid. Now it was just a matter of figuring out who was psychotic enough to do it. She shook her head and thought about poor Irene, caught in that trap.
**Irene, standing at the top of a staircase, gunshots fired.**
Abbey's eyes opened full of pain. Her old friend was in danger. Or was she? Abbey had only seen Irene and heard the shots. She hadn't seen the woman get hit by the bullets. The shots may not have even been aimed at her. But she could shake the feeling that Irene's life was on the line.
She called the Canadian Consulate and asked for Fraser.
"I'm sorry, Constable Fraser is out of the office. May I take a message?" the receptionist asked.
"Yes, please tell him that Dr. Abbey Barnes called. And my intuition tells me I'm going to be needed in Chicago tomorrow. Have you got that?"
"Yes, ma'am. I'll give him your message."
"Please make sure he gets it verbatim."
"I will, ma'am."
"Thank you."
She released the connection and then dial her travel agent, finding out how fast she could get to the Windy City.
Friday morning Abbey had three classes to teach but was done by 11:00 a.m. and just made it to the airport in time to her catch her flight. Arriving in Chicago in the middle of the afternoon, she rented a car and drove straight to Zuko's house. Ringing the bell, she was greeted by a large man who didn't appear to have sense enough to come in out of the rain.
"Yeah?" he asked.
"Hi. I'm Abbey Bigna. Is Irene home?" she asked cheerfully.
"Just a minute. Come on in." The man left her standing in the foyer as he stepped into the study. "Boss, there's an Abbey Bigna here to see your sister."
Moments later Abbey saw Frank step out into the hall. Spotting her waiting by the front door, his face broke into a smile that appeared to be friendly.
"Abbey!" he cried holding out his arms in welcome.
Though she hated her duplicity she returned the gesture. "Frank, how incredible to see you."
"What are you doing here? I haven't seen you in ages."
"I know. After mom and dad died I decided to take off and see the world. But now I'm here and rumor has it that your sister is here too."
"Yeah, she's upstairs in her old room. Go on up. I'm sure she'd love to see you."
"Thanks." She kissed both his cheeks before dashing up the stairs.
When she reached the second floor landing, she realized just how long it had been since she'd set foot in this house. Her parents were still alive then and she'd been helping Irene with math homework. She looked at the scene carefully and realized that it matched what she'd seen in her vision. The door to the old room was closed. Abbey listened but didn't hear anything. Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she knocked on the door, wondering if Irene would remember the pattern to her knock.
She didn't. The door opened gradually and Irene's eyes grew wide with amazement when she saw Abbey standing there.
"Is it really you?" she asked in wonderment.
"In the flesh."
Irene grabbed her old friend and pulled her into the room. Abbey felt like they were teenagers again falling across the bed and sharing secrets.
"I can't believe this. Are you living in Chicago?" Irene asked.
Well, obviously Ray hadn't mentioned her.
"No, I live in Atlanta now. I'm teaching at Emory University."
"Ahh, putting that degree in international politics to work, huh?"
"Uhh, no. I never went to Yale and got that degree. Look, Irene I'd love to share all the details with you but I'm afraid we don't have time right now. We've got to get you out of the house."
"Out of the house? What are you talking about? This is my home. Dad left it to me and Frank."
Abbey took a deep breath. "Look Irene, remember how you always said I had an extra helping of woman's intuition?"
"Sure, but what's that got to do with anything?"
"My intuition tells me you're in grave danger if you stay here." She hoped her friend would listen to her. She had in the past.
"Abbey, you're nuts."
"I'm not nuts. Remember the night I covered for you and Ray even though I said I didn't think it was safe. You missed getting caught by your dad by thirty seconds. Remember when I told you in tenth grade that Sister Margaret was pregnant? You said I was nuts then but eight months later when the baby was born you said I must have some kind of gift. Well you're right. I do and that gift is telling me you're not safe here. Now please come with me and get out of this house."
"Look Abbey, even if I went with you there's no place to go that Frank won't find me."
It took everything Abbey had not to scream at the top of her lungs. "I can keep you safe. I can take you someplace where no on would ever look for you." she stated emphatically.
'Except for Ray,' she thought to herself.
Irene considered it for a second. "No, Abbey. I'm sorry but I just can't do it right now. What would I tell Frank?"
"Who cares? Tell him you're going bowling. Tell him you're going to a movie. Just get your shit together and get the hell out of here."
"I can't, Abbey. I just can't."
Abbey dug a pen out of her purse and found a scrap piece of paper. "Look, this is my cell phone number. It's always on. Please think about what I've told you and when you reconsider give me a call. I won't leave the neighborhood. When you call, I'll be here in less than ten minutes." She scribbled a few digits on the paper and the pressed it into Irene's hand.
The two women embraced tightly before Abbey casually walked out of the room. Frank caught her as she descended the final steps of the staircase.
"Whatsa matter? Irene couldn't walk you out?"
"Oh Frank, I think I can find the door easily enough on my own. You don't seem to have moved it in the past 15 minutes."
"So what's up with you and my sister?"
"Well, I'm in town for the weekend on business and I was hoping to entice Irene into coming out with me for a little night on the town. But she's got headache so maybe next time huh?"
"Yeah, next time."
"Good to see you again, Frankie." She blew a kiss at him as she walked out the door.
Once on the front porch of the large house, she exhaled deeply before descending to the walkway. Heading towards her car she noticed a blue van parked on the opposite side of the street. It had been there when she arrived. As far as she could tell there was no one in it but the engine had been running the whole time. She took a close but not obvious look at the vehicle and smiled to herself.
'So, somebody's got old Frankie staked out.' she thought. 'George didn't mention any FBI surveillance so it must be local.' Abbey steeled herself to see Ray come tearing out of the van screaming at her for interfering but she made it to her car unmolested.
Knowing the van was there made it difficult to stay as close to the house as she wanted. They'd obviously noticed her leave the house and would wonder why she didn't drive off. She slipped into the driver's seat and started the engine, turning the heater on full blast to warm up the car. It seemed the weatherman hadn't been informed that spring had arrived that morning. There was still snow on the ground and the air held an unmistakable chill.
At 5:00 p.m. Detectives Vecchio and Huey arrived at the surveillance van. The men whose watch they were replacing gave them a full report. So far there had been only one unidentified visitor. A girl wearing jeans, leather boots and a leather bomber jacket who stayed less than fifteen minutes and then left. She didn't appear to be carrying anything other than her purse either in or out. The two veteran detectives dismissed it as inconsequential and settled in to watch the house.
At 7:00 p.m. Abbey's cell phone rang. Fumbling she flipped open the mouth piece and spoke into it. "Abbey Barnes."
"Dr. Barnes, this is Benton Fraser..."
"Ben, this better be important. I'm expecting a call."
"Understood. I wanted you to know that I got your message. I called your home and office numbers but couldn't get an answer."
"That's because I acted on that bit of intuition I told you about."
"Where are you precisely?"
"Right where I told you I'd be. Right where I can keep an eye on things."
"Understood. Thank you kindly."
"Sure." Abbey flipped the phone shut and continued to wait patiently. She had parked the car on the other side of the block, at the entrance to an alley where she could be at Zuko's in a matter of seconds if she needed to be. Sipping a cup of coffee she had obtained at a neighborhood deli, she waited patiently to hear from her old friend. She was glad for the drink's warmth. The leather jacket she wore did little to protect her against the cold Chicago winter. Unlike the people in the van, she didn't keep her engine running just to have heat. She knew it was a dead giveaway, and she intended to come out of this alive.
She thought about Irene and wondered if her friend would take her up on her offer. Abbey had, to her way of thinking, sold her soul to the devil to make these arrangements. But mental poking and prodding by the shrinks at the Office of Scientific Investigation & Research with a return to the FBI would be worth it if it got Irene away from Frank and into safe hands.
The phone rang. "Abbey."
"Abbey, it's Irene. Were you telling the truth when you said you could get me out of here?"
"I swear to you on my parents' graves."
"Then come get me. I'll be on the sidewalk waiting for you in five minutes."
"I'll be there. And Irene?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm glad you came to your senses."
Abbey looked at her watch. She knew it would take less than a minute to traverse the alley to the street where Irene would be waiting. She had to time this just right. She didn't want to keep her friend waiting nor did she want to appear to be loitering when the police were watching the house. Four minutes later, she shifted the car into drive and carefully made her way down the alley. Arriving at the street she looked both ways and turned right towards Irene's home.
Just after making the turn, she realized that Irene wasn't out there waiting for her. Abbey's heart pounded in her chest. Pulling up just at the edge of the Zuko property, she parked the car but left the engine running wanting to be able to make a fast get away if necessary. She pulled a map out of the glove compartment pretended to be studying it, all the while keeping one eye on the door to the house where Irene should be emerging and one eye on the blue van across the street. A few moments later Abbey saw the back door the van open and one person get out.
The light from the street lamp didn't offer enough illumination to see who it was but another person appeared from out of no where and the two stopped to talk briefly. Then one person ran across the street into the house. As he ran through the circle of light on the pavement, she saw that it was Ray. Moments later another person followed. She didn't recognize him but the next body that exited the van and ran to the house belonged to Detective Jack Huey.
The sound of gunshots caused Abbey's heart to jump into her throat and then sink to the pit of her stomach. She knew she should drive away now and wait to find out what happened but she couldn't make her hand shift the car into drive. She simply sat with her hands on the steering wheel. She didn't have to wait for long.
Within minutes of the gunfire, Abbey saw Ray running out of the house with Irene in his arms. Abbey could only assume the worst that Irene had been shot. Tears streamed down her face as she watched the scene unfold before her eyes. An ambulance arrived and Irene was placed on a gurney and loaded up for transport. Abbey watched as Ray got into the ambulance as well.
"Hang on to her Ray. Hang on. Don't let her go. You kept me alive. You can do the same for her." Abbey urged quietly.
A gentle knock on the driver's side window alerted Abbey that someone was watching her. Hastily wiping the tears from her eyes, she rolled down the window and looked into the most incredibly kind looking eyes she'd ever seen.
"Dr. Barnes, I presume?" he asked.
"And that would make you Constable Fraser."
"Ah yes. Could I trouble you for a lift to the hospital? I think Ray is going to need both of us tonight."
"Get in. I'll be happy to take you there."
The long legged Mountie slid into the front seat of the sedan she had rented for the trip.
"What hospital?" she asked.
"University."
Along the way, Fraser filled her in on the story of what had transpired over the past four days.
"You were right. Zuko wasn't the bomber. It was one of his associates with a desire to take over."
"Oh man, sometimes I hate it when I'm right."
"Why is that?"
"Because there are very few things I would like to see more than Frank Zuko in prison for the rest of his life."
"Agreed. But what were you doing parked by the house tonight."
Abbey sighed. "Trying to get Irene out of there. I went over to visit her earlier in the afternoon. I told her she was in grave danger and tried to get her to leave with me then. She refused but then called me later and asked me to come get her. I got concerned when she wasn't outside waiting for me like we had planned so I decided to sit tight and see what the delay was all about. Maybe if I'd just gone in after her..." her voice trailed off.
Fraser put one hand on her shoulder. "I don't think Mr. Zuko would have let you take her anywhere."
"I felt it was worth a shot. Irene was one of my best friends when we were teenagers. It just killed me when her dad sent her of to a private boarding school up near Evanston. She only came home one weekend a month and that wasn't nearly enough time to catch up on all that had happened. Poor Ray."
"Ray?"
"Yeah, he loves her, you know. He's done some really stupid and risky things in his life for that love."
"I know."
"I just pray that it's not all for nothing."
"And what about you?"
"What about me?"
Fraser ran a nervous thumb across his eyebrows and looked at the floorboard of the car. "Don't you... I mean it seems that... of course Ray's not told me everything but..."
"Constable Fraser, are you asking me if Ray & I had sex or are you curious about my intentions towards your best friend?" Abbey seemed amazed that he would ask such a question.
"Well, yes I suppose I am."
It was her turn to reach out and touch his shoulder. "Ray is a very old and dear friend. He saved my life after I was stabbed and that's a debt I'll probably never be able to repay. Of course, I'm not sure how good our friendship is right now. The last time I talked to him I called him a selfish bastard."
"I'm sure Ray will forgive you for that."
"Maybe. Maybe not.
"Well, we're here. I'll let you off here so you can go be with Ray."
"Aren't you coming in?"
"No, I don't think my presence there would be welcomed. I'm going to spend the night at Father O'Reilly's. I'll check in with the Vecchios tomorrow."
"Dr. Barnes,"
"Abbey," she reminded him.
"Abbey, don't give up on Ray."
"I won't."
She watched Fraser walk in the emergency room entrance. Thanks to their head start, they had arrived just after the ambulance. She knew Ray was in good hands now and hoped Irene would be, as well. Pulling her cell phone out of her purse she called the Padre.
"Father O'Reilly's," the voice answered.
"Padre, it's Abbey. I'm afraid things didn't go as planned tonight. Is it still okay if I come spend the night even if I'm alone?"
"Especially if you're alone. I'll be waiting for you at the rectory."
"I'll be there in about thirty minutes."
Saturday morning found Abbey on the front porch of the Vecchio home ringing the doorbell. Fraser had called her the night before from the hospital with the news that Irene had died at the hospital and that it was being ruled an accidental shooting. Abbey's blood boiled to know that Frank Zuko could kill his own sister and still get off. But now came the hardest part, mending fences with Ray.
Mrs. Vecchio answered the door and quickly ushered Abbey into the house asking if she wanted breakfast.
"No thanks. I've already eaten. I was hoping I could talk to Ray?"
"He's in the dining room, dear."
"Thanks Mrs. V."
Abbey walked across the living room and saw Ray sitting at the dining table. She took a chair on the opposite side of the table and just watched him for a few minutes, absorbing the conflicting emotions that raged through him.
"It's not your fault, you know," she said quietly
"Huh?" he asked looking up. His eyes were bloodshot and heavily shadowed showing the hours of sleeplessness he had endured.
"Irene's death. It's not your fault."
"And what would you know about it?" he asked sarcastically.
"A lot. I didn't just get off the plane from Atlanta. I went over there yesterday afternoon trying to get her to go to Father O'Reilly's with me. I had arranged with the bureau to get her into protective custody. She wouldn't leave."
"Yeah? Well she must have had a change of heart later cuz she tried to slip out and Frankie stopped her. He thought she was runnin' off with me."
"Oh my God!" Abbey's hands flew to her mouth to cover her look of horror. "Is that why he shot her? How could that be an accident?"
Ray shook his head and looked down at the table. "Nah, the shooting was an accident, as much as I hate to say it. Something startled Frank and his gun went off. He was aiming at me but he missed and got Irene."
Though his voice was calm, Abbey saw the way his hands shook as he tried to lift his mug of coffee to his lips. Tears made quiet tracks down his cheeks.
"But he was trying to kill you. How can you just let that go?"
"Because I promised Irene I would. I promised her I'd end the feud there."
"Oh my. 'You're a better man than I am, Gunga Din'. I don't think I could have made that promise."
He didn't respond. And she thought of another promise that was still unkept.
"Look Ray, I'm staying with Father O'Reilly while I'm in town. You've got my cell phone number or you can reach me there. I've got a few errands I want to run now but I'll be back there this afternoon. Please give me a call when you're feeling up to it."
"Yeah. Okay."
There was no enthusiasm behind his words and Abbey suspected he only said it because he felt a response was necessary.
She stood up and let herself out. Once in her car, she thought about where she wanted to go next and found herself pulling up in front of the 27th Precinct. She could see the spot where Ray's car had been the night of the bombing. The asphalt was scorched and the bricks in the wall of the building showed the impact of the flying debris. Knowing it was a long shot for a Saturday, she had come to see Lt. Welch. She found him sitting behind his desk sipping a cup of coffee and reading one of the many reports that were stacked on his desk. She knocked on the doorframe to announce her arrival.
"Dr. Barnes," he said startled. "I didn't expect to see you."
"You didn't expect to see anyone today. Did you?" She poured on every bit of training she'd had in dealing with people.
"No, frankly I didn't. I was hoping to spend a quiet Saturday catching up on paperwork. What can I do for you?"
"I'm afraid I'm here to add to your paperwork," she stated contritely.
"How's that? I understand you're not with the FBI anymore."
"Not for the moment. This is a personal matter. I'd like to inquire about the possibility of Detective Vecchio taking some time off."
"Oh?" he asked eyebrows raised.
"Yes sir," she said in her most professional manner. "I've just come from the detective's home and I'm very concerned about him, both as a psychologist and a former fellow officer. He's riding the ragged edge of disaster. That bomb was meant for him and instead killed a fellow officer and friend. Last night he lost someone else whom he was close to and had been for as long as I've known him. Now you can recommend he got see the department shrink. In fact you can order him to do it but I'm not sure what good it'll do. I really think he needs some time away from Chicago. Give him a chance to distance himself from those memories"
"How much time?"
"A week, maybe?"
"And you'll be going with him?"
Abbey laughed knowing what the Lieutenant had left unsaid. "I'll probably be dragging him, kicking and screaming as I go. Cuz I'm pretty sure he won't go willingly."
"One week, Dr. Barnes, beginning Monday. I'll take care of the paperwork."
"Thank you, Lieutenant."
Abbey continued her errands, taking time to stop for lunch before returning to Father O'Reilly's. She spent the afternoon assisting the priest with some paperwork and talking about her life and where it was going. It was not a comfortable subject for her but Walt had been an agent for over twenty years and knew, better than most, just what it was like to quit and move on to something else.
As they sat down to supper at the rectory, Abbey's phone rang.
"Excuse me, Padre," she said as she picked up the phone.
"Abbey Barnes."
"It's Ray."
"Hi, Ray."
"I just got off the phone with Father Behan. Zuko's made arrangements for Irene's funeral mass to be Monday at 10:00 at Saint Michael's. I thought you'd like to attend."
"Thanks Ray. Would you like to ride with me or will you be going with your family?"
"No, I'm not going."
"Ray Vecchio, you selfish bastard. Like hell you're not going. She was your friend too. How dare you dishonor her memory by not going to the mass!"
"Look Abbey, I promised Irene I'd end it with her brother and I intend to keep that promise. But it ain't gonna end if I show up at the mass. You know how Frank is."
"Yes, I do and I know how you are. You can't control what he does but you can control your reactions to him. Now, I'll pick you up at 9:30 Monday morning. And you'd better be ready."
"Right Abbey," he said before he disconnected.
"Sorry for the interruption," Abbey apologized to her host.
"Your friend giving you trouble?"
Abbey had never told Walt about her tryst with Ray or the resultant connection she had with him. She hung her head and thought for a minute. When she looked up again, her dark brown eyes were deadly serious.
"Forgive me father for I have sinned. It has been way too long since my last confession..."
"Abbey, we don't have to talk about this if you don't want to."
"No, it's been weighing on my mind for a while and I'd like to talk about it."
She told him all about her previous trip to Chicago and how she and Ray had pretty much picked up as they'd left off seventeen years ago. A part of her felt like she was still a teenager and suddenly she was thinking that his wasn't such a good idea. She was wondering how to say what they'd done without really saying it and Father O'Reilly was aware of her discomfort.
"What's wrong, Abbey?"
"I just realized why I quit going to confession. I don't like talking about my sex life to any one, much less a priest."
"Abbey, need I remind you that I was married for twenty years before my wife passed away? Not to mention all the years I put in at the Bureau? I find it hard to believe that you're going to tell me anything radically new and different. Don't worry about the fact that I'm wearing a collar now."
"Okay, but you have been warned. Anyway after a few days of intense flirtation, we finally found some time to make love. It was the most incredible experience of my life. And I've had plenty of experiences of that type to compare it to. It was like we were a single entity joined in a perfect union.
"The next day, when I was stabbed, I was able to find my way back to that spot and latch onto something that would keep me alive. When Ray and I were separated in the emergency room, I felt I was falling into a black hole. After a lot of searching, I found my mother's spirit. She kept telling me to go back but I couldn't find any reason to. Then Ray took my hand and shared his spirit with me again so that I would come back."
"So what's your problem now?"
"He's hurting so much. I wish I could do something for him. I tried to get Irene out so they could be together..."
"Why?"
"Why?" she asked clearly not understanding his question.
"If you and Ray experienced this incredible 'union' as you call it, why were you trying to get Irene to safety? Why not keep him for yourself?"
"Padre, I owe him more than I could ever repay in two lifetimes. How do you compensate someone for saving your life?"
"You don't. There isn't a way to repay that kind of debt."
"Precisely. So I did the next best thing I could think of. I tried to get him the woman he's loved for so long. I tried to do something that would make him happy."
"And what about you? Don't you think he loves you?"
"I don't know. I think I just showed up at a convenient time in his life when he was lonely."
"And you? Were you lonely?"
"You bet."
"Abbey, if you were anyone else, I'd tell you that there's a reason the church recommends you wait until after marriage to begin having a sexual relationship with someone. You've experienced something with Ray that should never happen outside a committed relationship. But I think you already know that."
"Yeah, I do. But I never bought into that old 'the earth moved' business. I thought it was a bunch of crap written by frustrated old maids who write romance novels about heaving bosoms and sensuous lips with titles like 'Sword of Desire'. I just figured it was fun and why shouldn't I enjoy myself when the opportunity was presented. Who knew?"
The priest decided against telling her God knew. He was sure she already knew that too. "So what's your plan?"
"Well, I'm going to make sure Ray attends that funeral if I have to pick him up and carry him there. And then... well, I'm not sure. I talked to Ray's commanding officer this afternoon. He's arranging for Ray to have next week off. I was thinking about maybe taking him away for that vacation I promised him and see if we could hash out this relationship we've forged. Maybe we can come up with some sort of mutual expectations."
"Good luck, Abbey."
"Thanks, Walt. I think I'm gonna need it." She paused for a second before putting her hands on the table and pushing her chair back. "But for now, what I need is sleep. Yesterday was just exhausting and my body's still on Atlanta time."
"Go ahead."
"Would you mind if I skipped Mass here tomorrow? I think I'd like to go to St. Michael's."
"Certainly. Any other plans for tomorrow."
"I don't know. I'm kinda playing it by ear right now."
"Well, Lea-Ann always attends early Mass so she'll be back here by 10:00. You can leave a message with her."
"Thanks Padre," she acknowledged as she left the room.
Sunday morning, Abbey showed up for Mass at St. Michael's hoping to see Ray and talk to him. She arrived in time for the early service and didn't seem him. Afterwards she hung around the church long enough to see if he would come for the later service. He didn't appear but she was surprised to see Fraser on the sidewalk outside of the church. She hadn't seen him during the service.
"Ben, what a shock. I didn't know you were Catholic."
"Well, I'm not really. Where I grew up the nearest town with a church was quite a ways away from us. But I've come to know and respect Father Behan and this is a really welcoming place when I feel the need for spiritual renewal."
"I was hoping to see Ray but it doesn't look like he's going to show up."
"No, it doesn't."
"Ben, what are your plans for the rest of the day?"
"Why?"
"I'd to talk to you for a while about Ray. Would you mind?"
"Not at all."
"I'd kinda like to go back to Father O'Reilly's and change my clothes. Do you want to go with me or would you like to hook up later?"
"Hook up?"
"Meet."
"Oh, no we can go wherever you need."
"Thanks Ben. My car is parked around the corner."
The ride back to the Padre's was filled with a comfortable silence. Abbey was thinking about what she wanted to say to Ben. She knew that he and Ray had been the best of friends since the Mountie had moved to Chicago and probably knew Ray better than she did now.
Once they returned to the rectory, she dashed upstairs and changed clothes, donning a turtleneck and flannel shirt with jeans and tennis shoes. She held her leather jacket in her hand. Fraser was conversing with Lea-Ann trading recipes.
"Ready?" Abbey asked.
"Yes."
"Lea-Ann, don't worry about meals for me today. I'll take care of myself. Would you tell the padre that I'll talk to him when I get back tonight?"
"Sure thing, Ms. Barnes."
"Okay, Mountie," she said turning her attention to Fraser, "Saddle up."
"Are we going riding?" he asked confused.
Ray had mentioned Ben's difficulty with grasping slang. She chuckled. "No, it means 'prepare to go'," she said as she walked out of the rectory.
"Just where are we going?"
"Well, that depends in part on you. I'd just like to find a nice quiet spot where we can talk about our friend Ray. And I figured I'd take you to lunch. You got a favorite place?"
"There is a little diner near my apartment. Perhaps afterwards we could stop by and take Diefenbaker for a walk."
"Your wolf," Abbey remembered.
"Yes. Is that a problem?"
"Not for me. What about him?"
"Well, wolves are social creatures by nature. In fact, there are theories that the pack structure is not just an aid to hunting but also provides for other needs as well..."
"Ben, I was wondering how he did with strangers?"
"Oh, I see. Actually, Dief has become rather domesticated by our stay in Chicago. I don't think he should have any difficulty meeting you."
The introduction of Abbey and Diefenbaker went well. Abbey scratched deeply behind his ears and he sighed in pleasure before sinking to the floor.
"Oh you are a big softie, aren't you?" she cooed to him.
Dief's answer was an indignant whine but he rolled over on his back and allowed her to rub his belly.
"Such a good boy. Just a sheep in wolf's clothing."
Another indignant whine.
"I apologize. I'm sure you are much smarter than a sheep. You're also far more handsome.
Ben looked at her perplexed. "You understand him?"
"Pretty much. I may lose a word or two in the translation but I can generally get the gist of it."
"So where's that restaurant?" she asked changing the subject. "I'm starved."
It was a short walk to the small family owned diner. Abbey had inquired about bringing Dief but Fraser insisted his companion could wait for his walk.
They were seated at once in a booth along the wall. Abbey, throwing nutritional caution to the winds, ordered a bacon cheeseburger, fries, cole slaw and a chocolate shake. Benton ordered the same.
"You know, Abbey, Ray told me that your, uhh, 'abilities' were quite outstanding but he didn't mention that speaking to animals was one of them."
"Probably because he's ever witnessed it. And I can't speak to all animals. Mostly it's limited to canine and feline species. Though admittedly, I've not tried with any of the larger cats. But even if I couldn't, Dief's behaviors say as much as any words."
"Yes, I suppose they do."
Abbey sat back and watched Ben fiddle with the salt and pepper shakers. Ray had told her a great deal about his friend the Mountie. She compared his observations with her own and smiled. She wondered if he would be the first to break the silence that had fallen over them or if he was waiting for her to do it. Normally she would wait out someone who had information she wanted but today she wasn't in much of a waiting mood.
"You know, Ben. You're one of the few people I've met who's been at ease with me after they learn of my talent. Ray didn't react too badly but he's known me for a long time. I appreciate that."
"This is hardly the first time I've encountered someone with special mental abilities."
"Really?"
"Oh yes. I'm surprised Ray didn't mention the Madison case to you. A young woman was abducted and we were able to find her because of information given to us by a homeless man with similar abilities."
Abbey's eyebrows shot up. "No kidding?"
"Yes, Mr. Garrett was quite helpful once we could convince him that he would suffer no harmful retribution."
"I'm glad to hear that."
"And of course, there are numerous accounts among the Inuit regarding those who have the precognitive abilities."
"I'm not surprised to hear that. It seems like the more dependent we become on technology, the less inclined we are to just sit and listen. And that's all there is to my talent. I just try to quiet myself and listen to the emotional aura around me."
"And what is that aura telling you now?"
Abbey sat for a moment with her eyes closed and tuned in to her companion across the table.
"You're not entirely comfortable with me, not matter how much you pretend that you are. But I don't think it has anything to do with my talents. This is on a deeper level. You seem to be worried that I'm going to throw myself at you."
She admitted in the most private part of her mind that ever since she had seen his face looking at her through her car window Friday night, the idea of a roll in the hay with the Mountie had sounded fun. But she also knew that this was not a man who would take such an encounter casually. He wouldn't indulge his sexual self unless he were passionately attached to his partner. The red flush that crossed his cheeks in response to her words made her realize just how close to the mark she had been.
"Ben," she said touching the back of his hand lightly. "I don't know what Ray's told you about me. Yes, I am a tease. I love to flirt. I also know when it's appropriate and when it's not. With Ray it was appropriate. With you, I don't think so. Besides you and I have serious business to discuss here."
Her intense gaze was broken by the arrival of their lunch. They applied themselves to their food with great relish. Abbey was especially appreciative of the diner's coleslaw. The dressing was mild and not too peppery. She noted that Ben seemed to be enjoying his meal as much as she did.
Once her initial hunger had been assuaged by a several bites of her food, Abbey decided to question the Mountie.
"So, what are we going to do about Ray?" she asked.
"I was hoping you'd have some ideas."
"Well, I do. I've already talked to Lt. Welch and arranged for Ray to have next week off. I was thinking about kidnapping him after Irene's funeral and taking him away for a few days."
"Do you think that's wise?"
"Ben, I don't know what's wise anymore when it comes to Ray. I was hoping you'd be able to help me with that."
The Mountie continued to eat his lunch, determinedly avoiding her gaze. Her curiosity was now piqued. She wondered what he was not saying to her. She sensed a great discomfort from him. He certainly appeared to be avoiding a difficult subject.
"Hey," she said waving a french fry in front of his face. "We're here to help our friend. If you've got something to say, out with it. Don't worry about offending me or hurting my feelings. I can take whatever it is you've got to say. Let's concentrate on Ray."
"Well, I was thinking that while some time away may be a good idea, I'm not sure you're the best person for him to go away with."
"Why's that?"
"Well, it's just that, I think part of the reason Ray made such a big play for Irene was because he felt you had abandoned him."
"Oh?" she asked non-committally.
"When I returned from the territories last summer, you were the subject of most of our conversations. He kept talking about how great it was to see you again and how the two of you were going to take a vacation together. He was truly heartbroken when you didn't come up at Christmas. Ray normally keeps his emotions pretty much to himself. I could tell he was hurting, of course, but even some of his fellow officers have noticed it."
"Hmm, that's very interesting. Yes, I suppose I was being rather selfish for not coming up to visit. But I had no idea he'd take it so hard."
"He loved you Abbey. Or at least he thought he did."
Benton watched her face closely for a reaction to his last statement. He was surprised to see her nod her head in agreement.
"Yes, he probably did. What did he tell you about my visit here last summer?"
Ben's face colored slightly and he stammered for a few minutes. "Well, nothing really. I just inferred from what he said that you two..."
"Were intimate?"
Fraser swallowed hard and nodded.
"I'll spare you the gory details. But there's something I want you to know. That night, Ray touched a part of my soul that was virgin territory. No one has ever gotten that close to me, not even my ex-husband.
"It was wonderful and frightening at the same time. But it turned out for the best. As it was, I was able to reach out and grab hold of his spirit when I was stabbed. I'm convinced it was the only thing that kept me alive on the way to the hospital. Later on, he reached out to me with that spirit and kept me from dying. So you can see what kind of a bond we have."
"Yes, I can."
"Well, let me tell you, that kind of an attachment can be very scarey, especially for someone like me who has avoided attachments for most of her life. It's not that I don't love Ray. I do. But the intensity of what we shared and just what happens to me when I'm with him is overwhelming."
"Have you told Ray any of this?"
"I tried once but I'm afraid I didn't communicate it very well."
Ben looked at Abbey as she spoke. Even while she was eating, she never avoided his direct gaze. Though he didn't have her extra sensory abilities, he considered himself an excellent judge of character. He knew Ray considered him far too trusting of people but usually his assessments were correct. As he watched Ray's friend now, he knew instinctively that every word she had spoken was true. She hadn't held anything back from him and was truly devastated by the state of her relationship with her old friend.
"You know, there have been times I've dreamed about making a life with Ray," she continued, "but I'm just not sure I'm the kind of person who could settle down happily and raise a couple of kids. I like my freedom. I like my independence. Though it got old at times, I even liked all the travel I did for the FBI. It was interesting to see new places, meet new people, expand my horizons." She sighed and took a sip of her milk shake.
Not knowing what else to say about the situation, Abbey decided to change the subject.
"So, how do you like living in Chicago? I imagine it would be quite a culture shock after coming in from the more sparsely populated areas of Canada."
"Oh yes, it's quite different. Yet in some ways it's similar..." he began telling her about his experiences in the Northwest Territories and the Yukon.
Spring seemed to have suddenly arrived in Chicago. Where Saturday had been cold and dreary, Sunday was unseasonably warm with only a few fair weather clouds in the sky. Abbey shed her leather jacket, leaving it at Fraser's while they took Dief for a hike. The conversations that started at lunch lasted all afternoon until they finally returned to Ben's apartment as dusk began to swallow the Windy City. Abbey was somewhat amazed to see her car was still safely parked outside the building where Fraser lived. This neighborhood hadn't been a good one when she'd been living here and it had only deteriorated since then.
Returning to Ben's humble abode, Abbey picked up her jacket and prepared to leave.
"Abbey, I'm convinced you're right about Ray needing to get away from Chicago for a while. Where were you thinking about taking him?"
"Benton Fraser, have you changed your mind and decided that I am the best one to take him?"
"I think it would do you both good. You've obviously got quite a bit to talk about."
"Yes, we do. I just wish it were as easy to tell him as it has been to talk to you."
Ben's response was a blush and a shy smile.
"A guy I know at the FBI office here in Chicago has a little vacation house down in southern Indiana on a lake. When I was up here last year, he told me all about it. I'm pretty sure he'd let me use it, especially this time of year."
"I'll talk to Mrs. Vecchio and ask her to pack some appropriate clothes for Ray. I'm sure he won't go willingly." Ben smiled remembering his last trip with his friend to a more rural area. Well, at least they wouldn't have to worry about a plane crash.
"Thank you, Ben." She gave his cheek a quick peck. "I'm going to take Ray with me to Irene's funeral tomorrow morning. Would you like to go with us?"
"I would but I have the early shift at the consulate tomorrow. And I'm not sure my presence would be welcome at the funeral anyway."
Ben looked at the floor and refused to meet Abbey's questioning look. She knew something must have happened with Zuko but she chose not to press the issue.
"Okay, Ben. Thanks again, for everything. I'm so glad to know that Ray has you for a friend."
Giving Dief one more scratch behind the ears, she walked out of the apartment and returned to the Father O'Reilly's.
Irene's funeral mass was very moving for Abbey. The outpouring of emotion from all the dead woman's family and friends was almost overwhelming for someone of her abilities but she managed to shield herself somewhat. She was mostly concerned for Ray. When she picked him up, he had been virtually silent, refusing to respond to any of her comments once he'd said 'good morning'. He managed to offer sincere condolences to Irene's family, including Frank. Abbey held her breath waiting to see how he would respond. To her surprise, Irene's brother seemed grateful to both Ray's and Abbey's expressions of sympathy. As they returned to a pew for the mass, Ray resumed his stoic expression.
After the graveside consecration Abbey took Ray's arm and started to walk back to her car. They hadn't taken more than a few steps when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Turning around she was surprised to see Frank.
"The parish is having a big lunch for everyone back at the church. I'd like you two to join us."
Abbey waited silently to hear what Ray would say.
"Thanks, Frankie. That's real nice of you. But we've already made other plans."
"Yes," Abbey chimed in, "It's a really nice offer. Maybe we can get together the next time I'm in town."
"Yeah, next time." He looked carefully at Ray and then at Abbey. From the expression on his face, his thoughts were readily apparent. He wondered about Ray and Abbey showing up together. "It was really nice to see you again, Abbey."
"Thanks. I wish the circumstances were happier." Turning her attention to Ray she said, "We'd better go."
It wasn't until they were safely back to the car that Ray finally let his game face slip. The countenance that had been so carefully neutral all morning began to dissolve into extreme sadness. Quiet tears trickled down his face. Silent sobs wracked his body as he gave in to his grief. Abbey knew there was little she could do for him at this moment but give him time. Once out of the cemetary she chose not to make the left hand turn that would take Ray home and instead, drove to Father O'Reilly's. They were only a few blocks away before Ray noticed where they were.
"What's up?"
"You looked like you could use some down time. I figured this would be a good place to get it."
He tried to smile. His lips almost cooperated but he couldn't get the rest of his face to join in. Only sadness radiated from his hazel eyes. He reached for her hand and squeezed it gently.
"Thanks."
"You're welcome, Ray."
Saying a quick hello to Lea-Ann, they climbed the stairs to the room Abbey had inhabited for the past three nights. Ray flopped down in the rocking chair near the window while Abbey busied herself with getting her clothes packed. Several minutes passed before Ray noticed her actions.
"What are you doing?"
"Packing."
"Planning on making a fast escape?"
"No, I just figured my job here was done and it was time to be going back to Atlanta."
Comprehension slowly dawned on him. "Oh yeah, you've missed two days of classes."
"No I haven't. I left after my last class Friday and this week is spring break. I don't have to be back at the University until next Monday."
"So you just fly in and fly back and you don't give a damn about the people you left in your wake." Ray's voice was suddenly full of rage and Abbey responded in kind.
"How dare you sit there and presume to judge me. You have no idea what kind of hell I've been through since last June."
"What about the hell you've put the rest of us through?"
"Ray Vecchio, if you're in hell, it's a hell of your own making. I never promised you anything last summer except a good time in bed and a vacation. Well, you got your roll in the sack and as for the vacation, this is the first time I've been out of Georgia in almost nine months."
"What about Christmas? I asked you to come spend your Holiday break with me and you refused."
Abbey was silent for a moment. She couldn't argue that fact but she could deflect.
"Ray, when I said a vacation, I meant the two of us go off and get away from it all. I didn't plan to sit around your house with your family while you went to work every day. That was fine last year when I was recuperating but things are a little different now."
"How so?" he asked asked warily.
"You really wanna know?"
"Yeah."
"Are you sure?"
"Would I be standin' here having this conversation if I didn't?"
Abbey chose not to respond to that question.
"Fine, then we'll go back to your house, you'll pack a bag and come away with me for the rest of the week."
"I can't do that. I've got work to do."
"No you don't. I've already cleared this with Lt. Welch. You've got the rest of the week off and by God, you're going to take it."
"And just where are you planning on taking me?"
"I don't know. I'm making this up as I go along," she said exasperated.
Ray chuckled at her response and reached out for her. Abbey was the only person that could take him from livid to loving in less than ten seconds. She let him pull her into his embrace and they stood there for several minutes just holding each other. Reluctantly, Abbey gently pushed him away from her.
"We're not going anywhere if I don't get my stuff together," she stated.
"So really, where are we going?"
"Well, on such short notice I wouldn't recommend going anywhere too far away. I have access to a house on a lake in southern Indiana. Or we could just stop at Indianapolis. Or we could go up to Wisconsin."
"Tell me about this place in southern Indiana."
"It's a vacation home owned by a guy at the Bureau who works here in the Chicago office. It's about an hour south of Indianapolis between Nashville and Bean Blossom. I talked to him first thing this morning and he said if I wanted it to just drive by the office and he'd give me the keys and a map."
"Bean Blossom?"
"That's what the man said."
"I hope it's a good map."
"Me too."
She changed from her dress into a pair of jeans and a sweater. Placing her dress, slip, hose and shoes into the suitcase, she looked around the room making a quick check to be sure she had packed everything. She zipped her bag shut and started to pick it up but Ray stopped her.
"I'll get that for you," he offered.
Normally she would have protested that kind of chauvanistic treatment but today she decided against it. In fact it would be better if he did take care of her luggage.
"Okay, why don't you take my bags down to my car and then meet me over at Father O'Reilly's office."
"See you there."
When she was certain that he was safely out of earshot, she grabbed her cell phone and dialed the Vecchio house. She told Ray's mom of the change in plans and asked her to unpack Ray's suitcase so he wouldn't know what they had originally planned for him. She wanted him to think this was all his idea. Once she had Mrs. Vecchio's compliance, she turned off her phone and walked down the stairs.
Meeting Ray at the parish office, she said a fond farewell to the Padre and assured him that she had taken his words of wisdom to heart. After hugging Abbey and shaking Ray's hand, the priest wished them a safe trip and returned to his work.
It was well after dinner time before they got to the house at Lake Lemon. They dropped off their luggage and drove to Nashville to buy groceries. Both of them were careful to keep the conversation light and inconsequential knowing they weren't ready yet to delve into deeper matters.
Information and feelings came out in small bits over the course of the week, during meals, during walks in the woods surrounding the lakes, and sitting quietly on the deck watching the sun set. But it was three days later before Abbey could say what had been uppermost on her mind.
They were sitting in the den drinking hot spiced cider. Abbey had built a fire in the fireplace and they sat in comfortable silence listening to some music on the stereo. The flames lept and danced in a spectacular display.
"I'm going back to the FBI," she stated.
"What?"
"Ever since I left last year, there have been certain people in the Bureau who have been after me to come back. In exchange for protective custody for Irene, I agreed to to submit to an examination and training with the OSIR and eventually return to the Bureau. I'll be leaving Atlanta as soon as they post me somewhere."
"But why?"
"It was the only way I could think of to keep Irene safe."
"That's not what I meant. They didn't have to keep their end of the deal. Why are you keeping yours?"
"I'm a cop, Ray. I'm certainly not a teacher. I need to be putting the bad guys away not standing in front of a bunch of teenagers yammering on about anti- social personality disorders. In hindsight, I never should have left the FBI to begin with."
"But I don't understand. Where did all this come from?"
"I think this whole deal with you and Zuko really brought it to a head. Monday afternoon I saw your car exploding and I was so afraid you were the person who was standing next to it. And Thursday afternoon I had a brief vision of Irene at the top of the stairs and guns being fired. It just tears me up inside that I couldn't stop either one of those events from happening. Maybe, just maybe, if I go back to work for the FBI I'll have the resources I need to put an end to some of this craziness."
"I understand."
Ray put his arms around her and drew her close to him. He didn't say anything but simply held her and shared his love and affection for this woman he thought he knew so well. They sat and watched the fire recede to small flames and red embers. It was nearly an hour later when Abbey pushed away from him.
"As nice as this is, I'm starting to get a crick in my neck," she complained.
"Here, let me work it out for you," he said turning towards her.
She turned her back to him and let his long slender fingers massage the tension from her neck and shoulders. Within minutes she could feel her body responding to his touch in a way that she had wanted to avoid on this trip.
"Hmmm," she sighed.
"Feel good?" Ray asked.
"Too good."
Ray slid his arms around her and pulled her back into an embrace. Chastely he kissed her cheek.
"As much as I'd like to make love to you right now, I get the feeling it's probably not a good idea," he admitted.
"You're right. There is some unfinished business in that area that we probably ought to talk about but not tonight."
"No?" he questioned.
"No. I'm not quite ready for that discussion yet," she said with a rueful smile.
"Then would you please join me for a night of completely celibate bundling in my bed."
"Bundling? What's that?"
"Sleeping together, fully clothed, no sexual activity."
"And where, pray tell, did you learn of this?" she asked with an astonshed grin.
"Fraser," he said as if the answer should be obvious.
"Yes, of course. Well, if you think you can control yourself, I guess it would be okay."
"It won't be easy, but I think I can handle it."
"Okay, you go ahead and get ready for bed and I'll join you after I make sure the fireplace is taken care of."
He kissed her cheek again before releasing her.
An unfamiliar pressure across her side caused Abbey's eyes to open. Slowly regaining full consciousness, she identified the weight as Ray's arm. Sometime during the night, he had spooned his body around hers. Now, as she saw the first rays of morning sun come in through the window, she felt his emotions as purely as if she had tapped straight into his heart. Even in his sleep love, respect, protectiveness and affection washed over her like a warm shower. She felt it was such a pity that she couldn't convince herself to settle down and make a commitment to one man. And she wasn't even sure what was holding her back other than the fact that after 14 years of living like this, she couldn't imagine any other way.
She thought of her first marriage to Alan. What a disaster that had been! She knew that with the two of them in different branches of the military, it wouldn't be an easy life. And it was only six months into the marriage that she realized how difficult it would be.
Temptations abound when you're a woman doing what has traditionally been considered a man's job. And despite all the assurances that men and women are treated equally in the military, the truth is that everyone is treated like a man. Abbey didn't mind the treatment much. But day after day of being surrounded by healthy, red-blooded, lusty men was just too much for her libido to withstand. And no ring on her finger, pictures in an album or memories of her husband could keep her faithful to a promise she'd made when she was too young to truly understand the implications.
Well, she wasn't twenty years old any more. She was considerably older and wiser now. She knew she should be capable of making a mature and rational decision for a mate at this point in her life. But the fact that there were so many men to entice her senses made her reluctant to even consider the possibility of settling down.
Movement behind her brought her thoughts back to the man she currently shared a bed with. Ray was pressing his body against hers. Abbey felt something stiff press against the small of her back. She laid quietly listening to Ray's breathing. The slow, steady and rhythmic quality led her to believe that he was still asleep and this was just a response to an early morning hormone surge. Despite his lack of consciousness, she found herself wanting him and not sure what to do about it. On the one hand she knew it would be quite easy to roll over and simply begin to make love with him. She was reasonably certain that he wouldn't refuse her. But deep in her heart she knew that this would be a disasterous course of action. As much as she wanted Ray's body, she was fearful of binding her heart closer to his than it already was.
Ray laid behind Abbey breathing in the scent of her. She hadn't stirred when he had curled his body protectively around hers. Perhaps she was still asleep herself. He tried to keep his breathing even so she would think he was still asleep though he wanted to sigh as he thought about the events of the last week. He wondered how he had ended up in bed with Abbey just a week after he had professed his undying love for Irene.
In truth, he loved them both. Irene had always been the unattainable ideal. When he chose to be honest with himself, he admitted that things probably never would have worked out between them. Part of his attraction was that she was forbidden fruit. She would never have been able to completely sever her ties to her family. But he would never regret any of the time they had shared.
And Abbey? Well, he'd always been fond of her. If Irene hadn't been in the picture singing her siren's call, he probably would have pursued her more vigorously. But she'd always seemed so content to just be his buddy that he'd never really thought about her any differently. It wasn't until that night in Lucy SanAngelo's basement that he'd really thought about her in a more intimate fashion. When she disappeared two weeks after graduation he really had been concerned.
When fate had thrown her back in his life last spring he had felt so lucky. The night they'd spent together making love had been absolutely mind boggling. And the next few days at the hospital had been equally as confusing. Ray didn't quite know what happened to them at that time, but he knew it had never happened to him before. And he knew it was the most amazing thing he'd ever experienced. He'd been so hurt after Abbey returned to Atlanta. She kept putting him off, never wanting to discuss their future. He had wondered if there was someone in her life that she hadn't mentioned. A little discreet detective work answered his question on that matter but he still wondered why she held herself apart from him.
The last straw had been her refusal to come to Chicago for Christmas. He had really wanted to see her again and her argument that Christmas was a time for family didn't hold water with him. His family had always adored Abbey. Ma had considered her a third daughter since Ray had brought her home one day after school in seventh grade to work on their science project.
He'd only spoken to her briefly in the past two and a half months. Fraser had even commented on the fact that he hadn't sent Abbey a card at Valentine's day. When he explained why, his Canadian friend had suggested trying to see the situation through Abbey's eyes but he didn't want to think about that. So he'd just ignored the situation and let it fester. Now it was different. It was as if Irene's death had been a wake-up call to him, not to let love slip away without a fight. As he held Abbey in his arms, feeling her body rise and fall with her gentle breathing, he felt he could put aside his own feelings long enough to hear hers.
"Abbey," he whispered softly.
She didn't respond.
Raising himself on one elbow he positioned himself to whisper directly into her ear. "Abbey," he repeated kissing the side of her neck.
"Hmm?"
"You awake?"
"Yeah."
"You want some breakfast?"
"Why? Are you planning on cooking?"
"Yeah, I could do that while you're taking a shower. And then later this morning we could go over to that State Park the lady at the grocery store told us about."
"You want to go to the park?"
"Sure. We could go hiking, maybe pack a lunch. Just enjoy ourselves."
Abbey rolled over and scrutinized him closely.
"Who are you and what have you done with Ray?" she asked.
"I am Ray," he protested. "I just thought it would be nice to go out and do something a little different today."
Abbey was suspicious but decided to go along with him. "Sure. You fix breakfast and I'll run through the shower."
Abbey yawned and stretched as she rolled out of the bed. Momentarily forgetting where she was, she stumbled into a wall she hadn't expected to be there.
"Ow! Son-of-a-bitch!" she cursed as she stubbed her toe.
It was all Ray could do not to laugh at her clumsiness.
"Shut up Vecchio!" she commanded.
"What? I didn't say a word."
"I could hear you thinking."
It was mid-morning before they reached Brown County State Park. The gate attendant handed them a map as they drove in. Finding a convenient spot to park, they took a look at the map and picked out a trail to hike. Abbey drove them to a parking spot near the trail head and locked the car before they took off. Glancing again at the map she realized that Ray had suggested they hike the longest trail in the park. Something was definitely up with him.
They'd been hiking for nearly half an hour, not speaking much at all other than to point out the occasional deer that wandered across their path when Ray took Abbey's hand.
"I've been thinking," he began.
Abbey bit back the wise-ass retort that she might normally have responded with, sensing that he had something he really wanted to say.
"About?" she asked.
"Life... liberty... the pursuit of happiness."
Abbey laughed, amazed that he remembered the conversation they'd had on his front porch last year.
"And?" she prompted.
"Why didn't you come up at Christmas?" he inquired gently.
"Ray, we've been through this already."
"No, really. Cuz the family excuse just doesn't cut it. You know my family adores you."
"Yes, I do. But just because they think of me as family, doesn't make them my family. It's hard to explain, Ray but I'm still an orphan, no matter who wants to 'adopt' me."
Ray took a deep breath knowinging he was about to skate on thin ice. "Let's talk hypothetically here. Let's say you were to get married. Are you saying you wouldn't spend time with your in-laws cuz you feel like they're not your real family?"
Abbey shot him a stunned look. "Speaking completely hypothetically, if I were married, it would be different. I'd be sort of bound to my husband's family. Not that that's a bad thing. But the fact is you and I are not married. We're friends. And that changes everything."
"Have you ever consider getting married again?" he inquired.
"No."
"No? Why not?" Ray seemed truly stunned.
Looking around, Abbey saw that they were coming up on a picnic area and led Ray off the path to sit down at one of the benches. She held his hands across the wooden table.
"Ray, I won't re-marry for one simple reason. I'm a slut."
"Huh? What are you talking about?"
"I'm a slut, Ray. And sluts don't make good marriage partners."
"You're not a slut."
"Yes I am. I rate every man I meet on a scale of one to ten with the sole criteria being how good he would be in bed."
"That doesn't make you a slut."
"No, but finding out if my rating's accurate or not does."
"I'm not following you here."
"Ray, I love men. And I love sex. Sleeping around is what made me realize that I shouldn't have married Alan. And I can't say I've changed much since then. I'm just not willing to make the commitment."
"So that night last summer?"
Abbey paused. As much as she wanted to sluff it off as just passing lust, she couldn't lie to him. "You tell me," she said evading the question.
"Abbey, I know when you're trying to blow me off. Now tell me the truth."
"It was the most magical moment I've ever experienced with another human being, in or out of bed," she whispered, looking down at their clasped hands. "It's a night I'll never forget no matter how long I live. If it hadn't been for that experience, I would have died on the way to the hospital."
A tear dripped from her eye and landed on their clasped hands.
"I love you, Ray. And I loved making love with you. But the truth is, this is one debt I can't repay. You saved my life and even if I married you, I couldn't change just to make you happy. And if by some small chance, I did manage to quit sleeping around, you'd always wonder if I did it just out of gratitude for keeping me alive. I tried to get Irene out of her house for you. I wanted the two of you to try and make a go of it. I hoped that getting you two together would begin to erase some of that debt."
Ray did not let go of Abbey's hands as he moved to sit next to her on her bench. Once there, he took her into his arms and held her gently.
"You don't owe me nothin'. I didn't do anything special. I just held your hand and talked to you."
"You don't understand. When I was in the ICU room you took my hand and shared your soul with me once again. I was ready to give up and go with Mom, despite the fact that she kept telling me not to. And then you reached out and pulled me back to the land of the living."
"You are incredible. I'm not asking you to marry me to pay back some debt you think you owe me. I'm just tryin' to figure out where we stand with each other."
Abbey wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and sniffled. "I admitted too much, huh?"
Ray hugged her tightly. "Never. I'm glad to hear you enjoyed our time together as much as I did. You know, we never really talked about it afterwards."
"We had a few other things on our minds. Like catching a murderer?"
"Yeah, and getting you healthy again. Speaking of which, how are you doing?"
"Well, I'm resigned to the fact that my right kidney is never going to function at full capacity. But my doctor in Atlanta says as long as I take care of myself and don't do anything stupid, like drink anti-freeze I should be okay."
"Good. I care about you. You know that, don't you?"
"Yeah, that fact is starting to sink in."
"So, you ready to finish our hike?"
"I think so."
That night they once again sat in front of the fireplace, this time sipping peppermint flavored hot cocoa and listening to some Lionel Hampton CD's Abbey had found in the stereo rack. Now that they had cleared the air about their feelings for one another, Abbey felt more comfortable with Ray's arm around her. But there was still one thing bothering her.
"You know," she said in her forthright manner, "Ben told me he thought you had taken up with Irene just because you felt I'd abandoned you."
"He did?"
"Yup."
"And what else did he tell you?"
"Oh a lot of things. You know, even though we've known each other longer, I think in many ways he knows you better."
"I can think of one way in which he doesn't know me better," he responded nuzzling her neck.
"Yes, I'm sure you can but that's not what I'm talking about," she said gently pushing him away. "Is he right? Do you feel like I abandoned you?"
"Yeah, I suppose so. You know, walking into Pat's that night was a real shocker. I was all set to have a celebration with my friends and there was Frank Zuko actin' like he owned the place. It just made my hackles go up, as Benny would say. I mean, I was feelin' pretty bad about you and me and still trying to be happy that I'd gotten my promotion and...well, you know how it is with me and Frank."
"Like oil and water."
"Yeah, so there she sat, next to her brother and suddenly I thought... Oh hell, I don't know what I thought. If I'd been feeling more secure, who knows. I might not have made such a big play for her. I might have been able to let it go. But there she was. And all those old feelings came back. I was probably being stupid cuz I knew as well as anyone how much her family ruled her life."
"Well, then that makes two of us who were stupid. Cuz I thought I could get her out in spite of her family."
"You know, she accused me of telling the basketball team that she had curtains around her bed."
"Well did you?"
"I never told a soul."
"How very chivalrous of you."
"You sound surprised."
"I am."
"Why? I never told anybody about what we did in Lucy San Angelo's basement. And if you'll remember, that whole thing started so I didn't have to tell about what Anne McGruder and I did either."
"Okay, you've got a point," Abbey conceded. Leaning into his half-embrace she sighed.
"I miss her, Ray. I know it's silly since I haven't really thought much about her since I left Chicago. But now that I know she's irretrievably gone, I really miss her."
"I know. I feel the same way. If I hadn't seen her last week but just heard that she'd died, I'd be sad and I'd miss her, of course. But it would have been different."
"You really gonna end your feud with Frank?"
"I gave her my word."
"Well, I wish you all the best. Right now there's nothing more I'd like to do than to reach down his throat and rip out his lungs. Of course, come to think of it, I've always felt that way about him. He's such a smarmy bastard. You don't know how hard it was for me to be friendly to him when I went to see Irene."
"I guess he forgot about the time you racked him for extorting your brother's lunch money."
"God, I'd forgotten about that." She laughed at the memory. "How old was I? Fourteen, maybe? I was so pissed off at Tim when he came home and scarfed down all the cookies I had made for the G.A.A. bake sale. And when I heard why he was so hungry, 'pissed-off' didn't even begin to cover it."
"Well, I'm glad I was there to see it. Cuz I don't think I ever would have believed it otherwise."
"I still can't believe my parents made me go over and apologize to that creep. What a let down. Here I was feeling pretty damn good about myself for having taken care of the situation without being a tattletale and then I have to go over to Zuko's house and eat crow. Obviously, Frankie didn't have any problems with being a tattletale."
"I'm surprised he had the balls to tell anybody what happened to him."
"I'm surprised he had balls, period, after that. God knows I sunk my knee far enough into his groin."
They shared a laugh as well as more memories of the old neighborhood and more cocoa through out the night. As the fire reduced itself to barely glowing embers, Ray managed to pull Abbey closer and closer to him. Soon he began to kiss her gently and affectionately. She responded in kind, caressing his face and running gentle hands down his shoulders and arms.
"Abbey, would you spend the night with me again?" Ray asked.
"Just like last night?"
"If that's what you want."
"You know what Ray? That's my problem. I don't know what I want with you. Part of me wants to take you to bed, make wild and passionate love with you and never let you go."
"And the other part?"
"Is scared to death by that prospect."
"There's nothing more I'd like to do than take you up on the first part. But I think we both know that's not in the cards for us right now. Is there anything wrong with taking what we do have here and now and just enjoying it? If it leads somewhere else, we'll deal with it. And if it doesn't, we'll just be happy for what we've got."
Abbey couldn't believe her ears. It sounded like Ray was willing to be a fuck buddy.
"You mean it?" she asked.
"Every word of it."
She kissed him with great passion communicating so many things she couldn't yet put words to.
Sunday afternoon, Ray and Abbey stood in the departure lounge at O'Hare International Airport waiting for the boarding call that would put her on the jet that would return her to Atlanta. For several minutes, they sat quietly just holding hands.
"So, how long before you go back to the FBI?" Ray asked.
"Well, the semester ends the first week of May. Of course I'll have a few days worth of clean-up work to do before Emory lets me leave. Then I go to Washington for my work with OSIR the first week of June. A lot of it will depend on how long they want to keep me."
"Think you can fit in a visit to Chicago sometime after you're done with school? Maybe come up for Memorial Day weekend?"
"I'd like that."
"And you'll keep in touch while you're gone?"
"Yes."
"Promise?"
"I promise. But you know, it would be a lot simpler if you'd just get a computer. Then we could swap short e-mail notes anytime we wanted to."
"Computer?" Ray's face was stricken.
"Come on, Ray. The twentieth century is about to come to a close. You've got a cell phone with voice mail for heaven's sake. Get with the times."
"I'll have to think about it."
"You do that. And if you need any help, you can always ask your nephew. I hear he's a whiz. Maria says he spends an hour after school everyday in the computer lab."
"Yeah, he's gonna be the next Bill Gates." Ray sounded sarcastic but he suddenly had a plan forming in his mind. He smiled as it gelled in his brain.
"What?" Abbey asked.
"Nothin'. Just thinkin' about little Tony and how much life has changed since we were his age."
Abbey knew he was lying through his teeth but chose not to say anything about it.
"Well, whatever way, I promise I'll stay in touch. In fact, I'll probably write you long letters whining about the way the OSIR folks are 'torturing' me."
"Any chance the FBI would send you to the Chicago field office?"
"Ray, I have no idea what they have in store for me. But you'll know as soon as I do. I promise you'll be the first one I call with the news."
"I'm gonna miss you Abbey," Ray admitted after a few more minutes of silence.
"I'll miss you too. This has been one emotional roller coaster of a week but I'm glad I had you to share it with."
"Thanks," he responded, kissing her softly.
The public address system announced the first boarding call for Abbey's flight. Reaching into her pocket she pulled out a small box and handed it to Ray. He opened it, not quite sure what to expect. Inside he found a gold crucifix hanging from a chain. He pulled it out and let it hang from his fingers.
"I said I'd give it back to you when we had our vacation, so here it is. Besides, I think you need it more than I do. I spend my days at a fine southern United Methodist university. You, on the other hand, are a cop in Chicago. But I do appreciate you letting me have the use of it."
Standing up, they hugged and kissed once more before Abbey grabbed her carry-on bag and walked towards the jetway. Ray watched her walk away, still holding on to the crucifix. So intent was he on his thoughts that he barely noticed someone take the religious symbol from his fingers.
"Here let me help you on with that," he heard.
"Thanks Benny," he responded.
The End.