No offence intended to anyone living or imaginary
, if anyone 
     should catch one of these creatures, please pack in a crate and

     forward to me. :)
     Fiona
     
     From the "Pocket Field Guide to Canadian Wildlife", 2nd edition,

     published by Wowwhosthat Publishers, 1996.

Field Description - Paulgrossus booglabooglaus

by Fiona Scott

Paulgrossus booglabooglaus:

     An exquisite, friendly, communicative creature. Professes a close
and 
     profound understanding of basic animal drives, but has known to
be 
     "buffaloed" by certain situations. Has been known to occasionally

     flash his naked rear end (but only when there is a movie camera

     pointed at him), the reason why is a mystery. Observed to travel

     extensively (and very quickly) and can be found on the plains of

     Alberta one day, and then pop up on the other side of the continent

     (or the world) the next. Has also been observed sky-diving, camping

     and horse riding, but usually only during the summer. Possesses
an 
     inexplicable fear of landladies wearing torpedo-like brassieres
and 
     has the ability to seriously disable motor vehicles. 
     
     In recent years has spent autumn and winter in the Toronto area,
only 
     returning to his lair to sleep. Often seen in the company of an

     American creature, 'Daveymarcianos hubbapeachyus' (see the "Pocket

     Field Guide to American Wildlife") during this time.
     
     Kit Kat bars have been found to be an effective lure, but this 
     creature is not a particularly picky eater. However capture is 
     forbidden, and next to impossible anyway, because anyone with an

     interest in catching one is usually quite dumbstruck by the creatures

     beauty when they finally do encounter one. Also this creature feigns

     slow-wittedness, but is in fact highly intelligent, cunning and
fast 
     moving and can only be caught when he wants to be.
     
     Description: Distinguishable by a muscular physique, blue eyes (can

     turn red during the winter), dark brown hair and extremely white

     teeth. Approx. 180cm (6 ft) in height. Skin colour varies from white

     to tanned, depending on the season. 
     
     Status: extremely rare
     
     Other Notes: Often mistaken for "Mountius hubbahubbaus", another

     Canadian species of similar appearance, but less gregarious habits.

     Note: Mountius species are protected by strict guidelines, see 
     "Canadian Government Mountie Season Regulations"