I love an idiot I love an idiot by silvina Disclaimer: Standard Disclaimer. Please don't pet the muse. He bites. (This means you Lumpy Butt "One conversation equals more stories!" Please send comments, questions, compliments, and otters to sdelcul@yahoo.com. Author's Notes: Something special for Shannon. Story Notes: Sarah McLachlan, "Ice Cream" Your love is better than ice cream better than anything else that I've tried and your love is better than ice cream everyone here knows how to fight "'Your love is better than ice cream?' Better than ice cream? What the hell does that mean, Fraser?" Ray looked up when he didn't get a response. "Fraser? Hey, Benny! Will you listen to me?" "Sorry, Ray. What was it you were saying?" "Never mind. It wasn't important." "Oh." Ray frowned as Fraser returned to whatever had distracted him earlier. He knew he wasn't being intentionally ignored, but that didn't make it easier for him to stop feeling that way. In Chicago he was usually the focus of Ben's attention, one way or the other, but in Canada he was nothing. And he was cold, too. The song continued playing, and he continued wondering what it meant. It was an excuse not to think about anything else. Hours later it was time for bed. Ray insisted that Fraser take the bed, since it was his father's cabin. He'd take the bedroll. Ben had been quiet all day, and Ray was surprised when he didn't argue the point. He'd been looking forward to it as part of their normal interaction. The bedroll was hard, and lumpy, and Dief lay down next to him to commiserate their shared misery. "Sorry, boy. No donuts. Not even a nearby Dunkin Donuts." He whispered. Dief whined. "Well, I'm sorry, but I'm not exactly living it up over here. Lumpy bed roll, no pillow--" "Ray?" Ben sounded tired, but awake. "Sorry. Didn't mean to keep you up." "Why don't you come up here? You can have the pillow." "You sure?" "Of course, Ray." "Thanks, Benny." He shivered in relief as he jumped from bedroll to bed, trying to keep as warm as possible in the cold air. In the bed he turned on his side, away from his best friend, leaving as much room as possible between them. He tried to lie there quietly, hoping that eventually he'd fall asleep from sheer exhaustion. "Thank you for coming with me, Ray." The quiet words made him roll over on his back to stare at the ceiling. "Why are we here, Fraser?" "To sleep." Fraser was lying on his back as well, and Ray turned on his side to watch him. He let one arm fall to where it was just touching Ben's left arm, and then pulled it back, suddenly afraid. When Fraser moved slightly it seemed like he was moving closer to Ray, and Ray felt brave enough to let his arm touch Fraser's again. Fraser fidgeted a little more, half on his back, half on his side, pulling Ray's arm with him. Accidentally? Maybe. maybe not. Feeling ridiculously brave in the dark, Ray let his arm slide down Fraser's abdomen and scooted closer, spooning behind him. Fraser didn't complain, and he seemed to lean back into Ray. Not sure what he was risking or why, Ray took the final plunge. He let his hand, which had been resting on the slight rise and fall of Fraser's stomach, move up his chest in a hesitant caress. Sudden movement from Ben almost had him panicking, but Fraser turned to face him, still pressed against him. Terrified, Ray opened his eyes to see that Fraser's eyes were watching him closely. He opened his mouth to apologize, not sure what he was going to say. Before he could form a thought coherent enough to speak, Fraser was kissing him. The kiss lasted for several minutes, not controlled by one or the other. Gradually though, it ended, and Ray wrapped an arm around Fraser's body. He wasn't going to be cold tonight. "Good night, Ray." "Night, Benny." Ray fell asleep quickly, matching his breathing to the feel of Ben's. End I love an idiot by silvina: sdelcul@yahoo.com Author and story notes above.