Cold Light of Day	   Cold Light of Day

 by Callie

  

 Author's website: http://www.geocities.com/callinuk

 Disclaimer: Due South and all of its characters belong to Alliance
Communications

 Author's Notes: 

 Story Notes: A sequel to After Dark.

 This story is a sequel to: After Dark 

 

 I stop to look up at our apartment building; I know that Ray is home as I
can see the light flickering in the windows. I sigh to myself suddenly
wishing that the apartment was cloaked in darkness because that would mean
that Ray was with his parents at their monthly family dinner. 

 Instead he is in our home alone and probably hurting because his parents
can't or won't accept our relationship. Ray gave them an ultimatum a month
ago telling them that he couldn't stand it any longer, that he had enough
of them ignoring me and our relationship. He told them that either I go
with him to dinner or he didn't go at all. I sigh again cursing his
parents for their short sightedness. 

 Although he won't admit it to me, the last month has been hell for Ray as
he waited for his parents to call. He jumped every time the telephone rang
trying so hard to hide the look of disappointment on his face when it
wasn't his parents. He has been on edge and jumpy, his nerves jangling
more than usual, his energy sky-rocketing as he desperately tried to
occupy himself, to keep his mind off his parents. 

 Francesca even called me, one day, at the Consulate because she was
worried about Ray, confiding that he had been more short-tempered and
moodier than usual. I reassured her that he was fine telling her that he
was just tired. She seemed satisfied with my explanation promising to keep
a sisterly eye on him for me. I then spent the rest of the day worrying
myself silly about him, and about us - terrified that I would lose the
best thing in my life. I even convinced myself that, even though he had
chosen me, he would change his mind and leave me to make his parents
happy. All my worries went out of the window when I got home. Ray was
there to welcome me as usual with a hug and a kiss. And he was just my Ray
- loving, kind and funny. 

 But I know deep inside me. Know that he is hurting. And we both know that
he isn't fooling me with his light heartedness, but he does it anyway not
wanting me to blame myself for the rift with his parents. He knows me so
well. But he can't hide from me. In the same way that I can't hide from
him. We are soul mates, our love for each other crossing all the barriers
and obstacles that people throw in our way. 

 And at night, in our bed, Ray curls up close to me, his skin touching
mine and his arm slung possessively over my stomach as if trying to
reassure me with his body that he isn't leaving me, that despite his
parents' objections, he has chosen me forever. Just as I have chosen him.
I smile to myself, the thought making me feel warm all over. 

 I look up again - the lights in the apartment are still flickering. I am
suddenly filled with an overwhelming feeling of sadness because Ray's
parents haven't called. I freely admit to myself that I don't have much
experience with families, but I can't understand how Ray's parents can say
that they love him, but not want him to be happy. I shake my head in
frustration at their confusing logic. 

 Diefenbaker whines up at me, and I lean down to ruffle his ears. "Yes.
We're going in now," I say to him as I try to compose myself, not wanting
Ray to see that I am troubled. Diefenbaker yips at me. "Yes," I smile down
at him. "We'll look after Ray." I can't help another smile - I think
Diefenbaker loves Ray as much as I do. We walk into the building side by
side making our way up the stairs and along the corridor to our home and
Ray. 

 I open the door and Diefenbaker bounds in with a bark hurrying to find
Ray. I sniff the air - the apartment smells of baking, and I wrinkle my
brow curious. "Ray," I call as I put my stetson on the hall table. "I'm
home." 

 "In here," a voice calls from the small kitchen. 

 Hanging up my coat in the closet, I stand in the doorway leading to the
kitchen watching Ray. The small kitchen is the scene of chaos - flour and
assorted baking utensils are scattered across all the surfaces. Ray is
standing in the middle of the untidiness, his hands resting on the kitchen
counter as he squints down at one of his recipe books. Diefenbaker is
sitting at his feet looking up expectantly for treats, as usual. 

 "Ray," I say. 

 He turns to look at me, and I have to stifle a laugh at the sight. He is
covered in flour. His jeans have floury hand prints where he has obviously
wiped them. He even has a blob of flour on the tip of his nose, and I can
see a sprinkling of white in his blonde spikes. 

 "What are you doing?" I ask looking around our usually neat and tidy
kitchen. "And when did the explosion happen?" I grin at him. 

 Ray looks down at his hands and jeans as if he has just noticed that he
is covered in flour. Shrugging his shoulders he looks towards me again. My
humour immediately dissolves as I see the look on his face - he looks lost
and vulnerable, and I think my heart will break at the sight of the sad
expression on his face. "I'm making you a cherry pie like I promised," he
mumbles as he wipes his hands on his jeans. 

 It all becomes clear as I remember the promise Ray to me if his parents
didn't call to invite us to dinner. "Oh Ray," I move forwards quickly
drawing him to me folding him into a hug. 

 "You'll get your uniform all messy," he whispers into my shoulder as I
pull him closer. 

 "Damn the uniform," I say sharply. I love him so much that it hurts, and
I can't bear to see him so sad because of his parents behaviour. "I don't
care about the stupid uniform," I soften my tone not wanting him to think
I am angry with him. 

 "You'll go to Mountie hell," he jokes. He chuckles softly, but it sounds
more like a stifled sob as he shudders against me. I silently curse his
parents again as I rub my hands in small circles across his back
soothingly. 

 "Ssshh," I croon as I walk us towards the couch. I sit us both down
drawing him close still whispering in his ear. 

 He sniffs loudly as he pulls out of the embrace. "Mum and Dad didn't
call," he tries a smile, but it doesn't quite come off or reach his pale
eyes. "So I thought to hell with them, I'll make us a cherry pie of our
own." He looks over to me searching my face, and I know he is looking for
a hint of anxiety or worry. I school my features into what Ray calls my on
duty Mountie face. It doesn't fool him, and he smiles at me touching my
face lightly with his fingers. 

 I smile back at him taking his fingers in my hand kissing each one in
turn. "So I see," I release his fingers to wipe the flour from the tip of
his nose."I would have never guessed," I tease trying to ease the tension
as I brush my hand through his spikes showering us both with flour. "So
what happened with the flour?" I ask with an encouraging smile. 

 "I kinda... you know," he grins at me. "Dropped the bag of flour, and it
exploded all over me." 

 "Ahhh, I see," I run the back of my hand down his face. "And the
kitchen?" 

 "Well," he reaches up to grab my hand. "The kitchen sorta became a
casualty as well." He squeezes my hand. "But the pies came out OK. Last
one's in the oven now." 

 "Ray," I look back towards the kitchen. "Just how many pies did you
make?" 

 He lets out a long sigh. "I was gonna make one but then.....," he looks
down at his jeans rubbing at the flour distractedly. He looks up at me,
his expression is sad again. "I thought Mum and Dad probably won't ever
ask me to dinner again. So I made six. I thought we could... you know
freeze the others for another time. What do you think?" He stares at me,
and I can see that his eyes are filling with tears. With a sniff, he wipes
at his face before looking down at his jeans again, biting at his bottom
lip. He is still clasping my hand, and pulls it towards him, close to his
heart. Lowering his head, Ray kisses my hand softly. "It's OK," Ray
murmurs against my skin. "Don't you go starting to worry or anything," he
kisses my hand again. "I'm good. We're good. OK?" He looks up at me again,
and I can see him fighting to shoot me one of his beautiful smiles - he
manages a small smile, but it comes across lopsided and sad. 

 I bite the inside of my mouth trying to stifle my own tears. I want to be
strong for Ray. Like he is trying to be strong for me. "Oh Ray," is all I
can think of saying as I pull him towards me. "I love you," I breathe
claiming his floury lips in a gentle kiss. "So much," I moan into his
mouth as he leans into the kiss returning it with a mixture of passion and
tenderness. 

 "Love you too Ben," I hear him whisper as we wrap our arms around each
other pulling the other closer still. "You and me forever," he sighs as I
pull him down to lie on top of me. His body is warm and heavy against
mine, and I revel in the feeling and scent of my Ray as I run my hands up
and down his back gently. He snuggles against me resting his head into the
crook of my shoulder, and I can smell the faint hint of the flour in his
hair. 

 We lie in silence, content to be together safe and warm in each other's
arms. Ray jumps slightly as the oven timer rings loudly piercing the
silence of the apartment. "Pie's done," he mutters pushing himself upwards
slightly. Still laying full length on me, he rests his head on his hands
looking at me. "You know Benton Fraser. You are the best thing that ever
happened to me. And I love you more than anything or anyone in the world."


 My heart soars at his words - Ray isn't usually given to sentimentality
so I know that he means the words. Smiling, I reach up holding his head
with my hands guiding him down towards me. "Likewise," I whisper as I
claim his lips in a soft kiss. 

 Pulling apart, we grin foolishly at each other for a moment. "Go shower,"
he brushes a hand down my face. "And I'll go battle with the kitchen." He
leans forward and kisses me quickly again before hauling himself to his
feet. 

 "I fear the kitchen is one battle you won't win," I tease as I roll to my
feet. "And watch out for those cherry pies," I grin at him. 

 He sticks his tongue out at me as he rolls up his sleeves. "Freak," he
mouths as he grins back at me. "The kitchen and those pies are so gonna
submit," he mumbles disappearing into the kitchen. "Gonna wash that flour
right outta my hair," I hear him singing as he starts to clank pots, pans
and utensils in his battle to clean up the kitchen. 

 I chuckle at him. "Go battle," I encourage as I head towards our bedroom.
I can hear him talking to Diefenbaker, who is obviously barking in
encouragement, probably hoping for titbits to fall onto the floor. I shake
my head, but know that I wouldn't change my life for anything in the
world. 

 Thirty minutes later, I emerge from the shower to find Ray and
Diefenbaker laying on the couch together. His eyes closed, Ray is ruffling
Diefenbaker's fur with one hand. My wolf is whining with obvious pleasure,
and I shake my head in exasperation. "How was the battle?" I lift Ray's
feet to sit down laying them back onto my lap. He opens his eyes as I
start to stroke at his feet. I notice that he has cleaned himself up as
well, all traces of flour having vanished. 

 "I won," he grins at me. "Told you I would." 

 "So you did," I lift a foot kissing at each of his toes. He giggles
trying to squirm out of my grip - we both know his feet are ticklish. We
wrestle for a while. Diefenbaker barks in disgust jumping off the couch to
lay under the coffee table glaring up at us. The expression on his face
makes us giggle even more, and we continue to wrestle until I make Ray
submit by tickling him all over. 

 We lay together panting. I pull him closer nuzzling my nose into his
neck. I am so happy lying here with here that my next words surprise me as
much as they surprise Ray. "Let's invite your parents here to dinner next
Saturday," I say. 

 "What?" Ray pushes himself up, straddling my legs, looking down at me as
though I have slapped him hard. "What did you just say?" he squeaks. 

 Ray's face has drained of colour, and I swallow hard wishing I could take
back my words. I take hold of both his hands frightened that he will
leave. "I thought that if your parents won't invite you... us to dinner,
we could invite them here," I stutter nervously. "And your brother and his
wife. I could cook. And we have plenty of cherry pies," I know I'm
babbling and I feel my face flushing. Ray continues to stare at me, his
mouth open. I look away from him not wanting to see contempt on his face. 

 "Ben," he pulls one hand out of my grip nudging my chin so I am facing
him again. I risk looking up at him steeling myself, my body tensing
expecting his anger. I stare at him, and he smiles down at me. Instead of
the expected anger, I can see only love and affection in his eyes and
expression. "Ben," he whispers again leaning closer. His breath caresses
my face and he kisses me softly. "Do you think they would come?" he asks
softly as he lies back down on me. 

 I can't answer for a moment, too stunned by his reaction to my stupidity.
Every day I count myself lucky to have Ray in my life. He never ceases to
amaze me, and I love him a little bit more every day, if that's possible.
I can feel his steady heartbeat against my body, and his warm breath
against my neck. His closeness calms me, and I release the breath I didn't
realise that I was holding. "We could ask," I eventually reply. 

 I can feel him nodding against me as he snuggles close. "They can only
say no," he murmurs into my chest. "And they might just say yes." His
voice sounds hopeful, and I squeeze him. He lays still for a moment before
starting to wriggle. "I'll call them now," he drags himself to his feet.
"Get it over with," he moves towards the his cell phone which is laying on
the hall table with my stetson. 

 I jump up off the couch to follow him, not wanting him to do this alone.
He retrieves his cell phone. "Ben," he reaches out and touches my arm.
"Let me do this alone," his pale eyes are pleading. "OK?" 

 "But...," I start to protest. 

 "Please," he silences me with a finger on my lips. "I know you want to
help. But I need to do this on my own. OK?" 

 I regard him for a moment. "Alright," I agree reluctantly. I sit back
down on the couch as Ray disappears into our bedroom closing the door
behind him. 

 I can't help myself, I sit at attention, my hands grasping the edge of
the couch in a death grip. I start as the door swings open and Ray slumps
down at my side. "Well?" I ask holding my breath. 

 Ray sidles up close to me, and I automatically put my arms around him
drawing him close. "I hope we got time to tidy up the apartment," he
whispers snuggling closer. "Because Mum has this radar thingy that can
spot dust at thirty paces." 

 "So I take it your parents have decided to accept our invitation to
dinner?" I say stupidly. 

 "Yeah," Ray sounds slightly dazed. "And they're bringing Tom and Susan
with them." Ray wriggles in the embrace until he can look up at me. "Do
you think everything will be OK?" he asks frowning slightly. 

 "Ray," I say. "Do you love me?" 

 "What? Are you nuts?" he shifts again to smile up at me. He gives me a
quick kiss on the lips. "Course I love you." 

 "Well," I say returning the kiss. "If you love me. And I love you.
Nothing or no-one can hurt us," I smile at him and he smiles back. "And
yes. With my roast beef and your cherry pies. Everything will be fine." 

 "OK. Good," he snuggles down again. 

 He starts to fidget again, and I can't help laughing at him - it's like
cuddling a barrel full of very active monkeys. "What's wrong Ray?" I ask
with a chuckle. 

 "How many cherry pies do you think we should serve for dessert?" 

 THE END 

 Views to callinuk@yahoo.com 

End Cold Light of Day by Callie: callinuk@yahoo.com

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