The Boogie Man    The Boogie Man by Iris Gray

 Author's webpage: http://victoria.tc.ca/~wy236/fic.html

 Author's notes: When I was having trouble coming up with a title for this
story, my Significant Other jokingly suggested I call it "The Boogie Man."
So I did.

  

 <PRE> 

 The Boogie Man 

 

 "So, Benny, you got any plans for the weekend?" Ray Vecchio asked Fraser
as he was driving the Canadian home after they had both finished work for
the day. 

 "Yes, Ray, I do," Fraser answered. 

 Ray opened his mouth, about to say something, then closed it when he
heard his partner's answer. Benny had plans? Benny never had plans. He
spent almost every weekend with Ray and his family. 

 "What kind of plans?" Ray asked. 

 "I have a date," answered Fraser. 

 Ray grinned. A date! Maybe this meant that Benny was finally over
Victoria. He clapped Fraser on the shoulder. "That's great, Benny! Who's
the girl? Do I know her?" 

 "It's not a girl, Ray." 

 "Okay, woman then. I know it's more politically correct." 

 "I mean, my date is not with a female," corrected Ben. 

 "Not ... not with a female? You mean, you have a date with a guy?" 

 "Yes. I am going to attend a concert with a fellow RCMP officer who
happens to be visiting Chicago. " 

 "Well, it's not really a *date*, right? I mean, he's another Mountie,
you're just gonna show him around town." 

 "No, Ray, it is most definitely a date. When Todd came to the Consulate
to introduce himself, we discovered a mutual attraction," said Benny. 

 Ray swallowed hard. He wanted to be supportive of his friend, but this
was not something he had expected. "So, um, does this mean you're gay?" he
asked. 

 "No, I'm not gay. I'm bisexual." 

 "Oh." Ray couldn't think of anything more to say for awhile. Finally, he
said, "Well, uh, I hope you have a good time, Benny." 

 "Thank you, Ray." 

 "Um, and you do know about being safe, right? I mean, not just because
you're with a guy, if you're with anyone new, you need to use protection."


 "I doubt things will go that far between me and Todd, but I do know about
safe sex," answered Fraser. 

 "Good." Ray was about to drive away after Benny got out of his car, then
he stopped and rolled down the window. "Benny, tell him that if he hurts
you, he has to answer to me, okay?" 

 Fraser smiled and nodded. "I'll tell him, Ray." 

 On Monday, Ray made an excuse to drop by the Consulate to see Benny. "How
did your date go?" he asked without preamble. 

 Fraser wasn't surprised that Ray had come by. He knew that his friend
would be curious. He was glad that Ray seemed to be accepting this
revelation about his personal life. "It was all right," he said evasively.
Actually, it had been a disaster, but he didn't want to admit that. 

 "Uh-oh. That doesn't sound very good. Tell me more." 

 "There's nothing to tell, Ray." 

 "When you say it that way, it sounds to me like there is. Spill it,
Benny. What happened?" 

 Fraser sighed. He should have known he couldn't hide anything from Ray.
"I'm afraid that Todd's intentions for the evening and mine were
incompatible." 

 "Say that in English, Benny?" asked Ray. 

 "He wanted more from me than I was prepared to give him," Ben answered. 

 "Meaning he wanted sex and you didn't?" Ray demanded. Fraser nodded. Ray
was furious. 

 "Where is he?" Ray asked. "I want to give him a piece of my mind. " 

 "No, Ray. I know that what you really want to give him is a piece of your
fist, not your mind. You don't need to defend my honour." 

 "Did he hurt you?" 

 "No," answered Fraser. 

 "You sure?" the detective asked. 

 "Yes, Ray, I'm sure." 

 "You're not just saying that to keep me from tracking down this Todd guy
and pounding him?" 

 "I'm quite all right, Ray. The only thing wounded was my pride." 

 Ray sighed. He felt helpless. He hated to see Fraser hurt, but he knew
that there wasn't anything he could do about it. "I'm sorry it didn't go
well for you, Benny." 

 "Thank you," replied the Mountie. 

 "For what?" 

 "For being my friend," answered Ben. 

 Ray was slightly embarrassed. "You're welcome," he responded. "And don't
worry about this stupid date with Todd. He's not the right one for you.
You'll meet the right guy or girl one of these days." 

 Fraser already knew that he had met the 'right guy' , and that 'guy' was
Ray. However, he was quite certain Ray did not feel that way about him. If
he was careful, Ray need never know how Benny really felt. 

 "I'm sure I will, Ray," he agreed. 

 Life went on as usual for the next few months. Fraser didn't have many
more dates, either with men or women. Sometimes Ray asked him about it, or
suggested that Benny try to meet someone. But Benny always made an excuse
not to. He would say his work kept him too busy, or that he was afraid the
RCMP would transfer him to another posting and that he didn't want to
start a relationship if he had to leave Chicago. The real reason for his
lack of dates was that he simply hadn't met anyone whose company he
enjoyed as much as he enjoyed Ray's. 

 Ray, however, did meet someone. Actually, he met her again - she was
Irene Zuko, his high school sweetheart, and he was absolutely head over
heels for her. Unfortunately, a relationship between Ray and Irene could
never be. Irene's brother was Frank Zuko, the head of the Zuko crime
family, who had been a suspect in the bombing of Ray's beloved car. The
bombing had killed Louis Gardino, a fellow detective at the 27th Precinct.
Fraser was able to prove Zuko innocent of the bombing, but not before
Irene was caught in the crossfire between Frank and his lieutenant and
killed, and Ben's friendship with Ray had been seriously threatened. 

 Ray was completely grief-stricken. At the hospital after he heard of
Irene's death, he sat with Benny and started telling him stories about his
relationship with Irene in high school. Fraser was uncertain of what to
do. He didn't think Ray should go home - his family would just ask him a
lot of questions that he didn't think Ray was up to answering at the
moment. He finally got up and said, "Let's go, Ray." 

 Ray looked at him in confusion. "Go where?" he asked. 

 "You're coming home with me," Ben answered. Ray shrugged and followed
him. 

 Benny used Ray's cell phone to call Ray's mother. He told Mrs. Vecchio
that Ray had been kept out late working on a case and was going to spend
the night with him. Then he set about finding clean sheets and making the
bed. Ray got into bed, then asked, "Where are you going to sleep?" 

 "My bedroll is quite adequate," he answered. 

 "You could sleep with me, if you want ... it might be a bit crowded but I
think there's room," suggested Ray. Then he added, "I would feel better if
you did." 

 So Ben got up and slipped into bed beside his friend. To his surprise,
Ray snuggled up close to him. Then he asked, "Make love to me, Benny?" 

 "No, Ray," Fraser answered, hoping his body didn't tell any differently. 

 "Please, Benny? I need to forget ... help me forget." 

 "Ray, you're vulnerable right now. I don't want to take advantage of
you." 

 "Benny, I asked you to! That's not taking advantage. It's not like I
don't want it." 

 "Ray," said Ben, "you're my friend. I don't want to risk damaging our
friendship." 

 "Benny, that's just it - you *are* my friend. Wouldn't a friend do this
for another friend?" 

 "I don't know, Ray," sighed Benny. "I've - I've never had a friend like
you before." 

 Ray pulled Benny into his arms. "Benny, I know I've treated you badly
these last few days, and I'm sorry. I'm your friend and I care about you.
Hell, maybe I even love you. I know that you care for me. Can't two
friends just comfort each other for one night?" 

 Fraser's body was definitely not resisting his friend's advances. He
finally gave in to the urging. 

 "All right, Ray. I do love you, and I want to comfort you. I just - don't
have a lot of experience with men." 

 "You don't ? But you said you're bi." 

 "That doesn't mean I've had sex with men, it just means that I find men
attractive and desirable," explained Fraser. 

 "Do you - do you find me desirable?" asked Ray. 

 "Yes, Ray," Ben answered. "I most certainly do." 

 The detective caught the Mountie's mouth in a searing kiss that left both
men breathless. "How do you want to do this, Benny?" Ray asked. 

 In response, Fraser removed the long underwear he usually slept in. Ray
took the hint and removed the undershirt and boxers that he had worn to
bed. He looked at Fraser's body for a long time before saying, "You're
beautiful, Benny." 

 Ben smiled a bit self-consciously and ran a hand down the center of Ray's
torso to his groin. "As are you, Ray," he replied. 

 Ray's hips moved toward the hand. Ben started to pull back, and Ray
reached down and stopped him. "It's okay, you can touch me," he said. "Can
I touch you?" 

 "Please do," answered Fraser with a half-sigh. Tentatively, the two men
started to explore each other's bodies, touching and stroking. As they
grew bolder, they kissed and licked and sucked at each other, learning
what made the other feel good. Finally, Ray rolled on top of his partner
and started to thrust against him. Ben moved to meet the thrusts and they
moved together until both climaxed. 

 Eventually they parted, and Fraser started to get up. Ray grabbed him.
"Where are you going?" he asked fearfully. 

 "I'm just going to get us a towel," Ben answered. "We should clean up." 

 Ray grinned. That was Fraser, always practical. "Oh. Right. Well, hurry
back, okay? I could get lonely." He had intended it as a joke, and was
surprised to find that he meant it. 

 Fraser quickly returned with the towels and cleaned himself and Ray. Then
he settled back into bed beside his friend - his lover, now. 

 "G'night, Benny," said Ray softly. 

 "Good night, Ray," said Ben, reaching for his lover's hand and squeezing
it. "I love you." 

 "I know you do." 

 The next morning Ben awoke with a start. He wasn't alone in the bed, and
the other body did not feel like Diefenbaker's. The last person he'd
shared a bed with had been Victoria. Then he remembered the events of the
previous night - Irene Zuko's shooting, bringing Ray home with him, and
Ray's plea that they make love so that he could forget Irene. It probably
hadn't been a good idea, but he'd given in. He didn't regret it so far. He
hoped he wouldn't later. That part was up to Ray. 

 He got out of bed and began to make breakfast. Ray appeared not much
later. "Morning, Benny," said the Italian. Fraser found himself feeling
nervous, wondering what Ray would have to say about their night together.
He studiously avoided looking at his partner and continued with his
cooking. 

 "Hey, Benny, I'm not the Boogie Man, here," Ray protested. 

 " 'Boogie Man' ?" asked Fraser. 

 "Yeah, you know, the Boogie Man, the monster under the bed, Dracula,
whatever scary thing you heard stories about as a kid." 

 "I'm afraid I didn't hear any of those stories, Ray, although the Inuit
do have legends..." 

 "Yeah, I should have known that. Anyway, why are you avoiding me all of a
sudden?" 

 "I'm not," answered Ben evasively. 

 "Yes you are, Benny. You having second thoughts about last night?" 

 "No, Ray, not at all. I very much enjoyed all that we did last night." 

 Ray grinned. "Good. Glad you enjoyed it. Guess we didn't do too bad for a
couple of inexperienced male virgins." 

 "Neither of us is technically a virgin, Ray." 

 The detective laughed. "With other men we are - were. Guess I should be
happy that my first time with a guy was with you, 'cause you're my best
friend and you're like a brother to me. Not that I'm planning on making
sex with guys an ongoing thing, you understand." 

 "Er, no, of course not," stammered Ben. "How do you like your eggs?" 

 Ray shrugged. "Breakfast isn't a big thing to me. I'll have 'em however
you're having 'em. You sure everything's all right?" 

 "Everything's fine," Fraser lied. 

 While Benny served breakfast, Ray called the precinct and told them he
wouldn't be coming in to work that day. Lt. Welsh was sympathetic and told
him to take some personal time. Ray sighed. 

 "Guess I won't be going to Irene's funeral," he observed. "Frankie
wouldn't exactly appreciate it, not that I care what Frankie thinks." 

 Fraser kept his head down over his plate and didn't say anything. When he
finished, Ray offered to help with the dishes. 

 "That's all right, Ray. There aren't many. Why don't you go take a
shower?" 

 "Nah, I think I'll wait till I get home to do that. Speaking of home , I
should get going before Ma starts wondering where I am." He hesitated.
"Listen, Benny, thanks for last night. I - I needed it. I know I'm not
exactly the man of your dreams or anything ..." 

 Fraser stopped him in mid-sentence by placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Ray, listen to me. I love you." 

 Ray smiled a bit sadly. "I know you do, Benny. I love you too. Like I
said, we're almost brothers." 

 "No, Ray." 

 "No? No, what?" asked Ray in confusion. 

 "I don't mean that I love you like a brother, or like a friend. I mean
that I love you." 

 Ray turned pale. "Benny, you don't mean that you're - that you're in love
with me? I told you that last night was just two friends being together
for one night. I didn't mean to get your expectations up. I'm not gay,
Benny." 

 "Neither am I," stated Fraser. 

 Ray groaned. "But I'm not bi, either. I'm straight! I like women. I was
in love with Irene!" 

 "You seemed to enjoy yourself quite well last night for a straight man." 

 "God, Benny, the mechanics work, no matter who's pushing the buttons." 

 "So that's all it was to you, then. Someone pushed your buttons and who
was doing it didn't matter," said Benny bitterly. 

 "Oh, no, Benny, I didn't mean it like that! I meant - " 

 "Never mind, Ray," said Fraser. "I think you should go now." 

 "Benny, I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you." 

 "I'm sure you didn't. Really, this is my fault - I should have listened
to you. I should have realized that all you wanted was one night. I
allowed myself to hope for more. I should have known better." 

 "I do love you, Benny, just not the way that you love me." 

 Fraser attempted to swallow the lump in his throat. "I know that, Ray. I
hope that one day you meet another woman who will make you happy." 

 Ray took that as a dismissal, and left. Ben went next door to Mr.
Mustafi's apartment to borrow his phone. He called Inspector Thatcher and
told her that he was too sick to come in to work. It wasn't a lie. He was
sick, just not in his body. He was heartsick. He went home, lay on his
bed, and cried. 

 Meanwhile, Ray was berating himself. He had hurt Benny. He hadn't meant
to. He knew he'd hurt his partner already due to his obsession with Frank
Zuko. But now they'd slept together, and Benny was in love with him. How
had he not seen that one coming? If he'd known before the way the Mountie
felt, he wouldn't have asked for it. But he'd needed something to take the
pain away, something to take his mind off Irene. And Benny was his friend,
and being bi he figured he must know how to love a man. Even if he didn't
have much experience, he did pretty well. Ray felt his face growing hot at
the memory of just how well. 

 He wondered if he could love Benny that way. He already loved Benny as
his best friend, and the sex had been good - hell, it had been more than
good. 

 He needed some time to think about things, and he imagined Benny did too.
Maybe he should just leave the Mountie alone for awhile and let things
cool off. Then, when he was certain of the way he felt, they could talk. 

 Ray didn't see Fraser or try to talk to him for a couple of weeks. He was
surprised at how much he missed Benny. The Mountie had been part of his
life for a couple of years, and he'd forgotten how lonely he'd been before
they met. He hadn't had many friends, he and Ange had divorced, and as for
his job, he'd just been marking time until his retirement. It had been a
pretty empty life, he saw now. Then he'd acquired the 'dead Mountie' case
and Benton Fraser had appeared, turning his entire life upside down. 

 And Ray loved him for it. 

 Damn. He really did love Benny. And not in the brotherly way he'd
insisted on. No, he was madly, passionately, deeply in love with the man.
Why had it taken him this long to realize it? And after he'd hurt him so
badly, too. He hoped Benny would forgive him. They were best friends,
weren't they? Of course he would. 

 Unfortunately, it wasn't that easy. 

 It wasn't hard for Fraser to avoid him at home - he didn't have a phone
and Mr Mustafi had been instructed not to take any messages from Ray. But
he was surprised at the way Benny handled his phone calls at the
Consulate. He was icily polite, especially when the Dragon Lady was in
earshot, Ray assumed, but he always found a reason to end the calls
quickly. He never flat-out said "I don't want to talk to you." Ray assumed
that such plain rudeness was un-Canadian. But he could tell that was what
Benny was really saying under all his courtesy. After this happened
several times, Ray decided to be more direct. He'd go to Benny's
apartment. 

 For once, Ray was glad that Benny didn't lock his door. He was able to
walk right in to the Canadian's apartment without knocking. He was
surprised to find Benny was packing. 

 "Benny?" he said tentatively. 

 "Ray!" Fraser was surprised. He struggled to keep his emotions under
control. "Why are you here?" 

 "I need to talk to you, Benny. Are you going somewhere?" 

 "I've applied for an overseas posting. The RCMP is sending several of its
members to the Yugoslav republic of Kosovo to assist in the United
Nations' peacekeeping efforts." 

 Ray gulped. "You're going to a war zone?" he asked fearfully. 

 "I don't know yet. I've applied, but I have to attend a training and
information session before I know whether or not I've been accepted. What
did you want to see me about?" 

 "Don't go, Benny. Please, stay here in Chicago." 

 Ben fixed him with a cold stare. "Why should I stay?" he asked. "There's
nothing here for me." 

 "I'm here," Ray said softly. 

 "And that's supposed to make me stay, knowing that you don't love me?" 

 "But I do love you," Ray pleaded. 

 Benny laughed humourlessly. "Of course. You love me like a brother.
Sorry, Ray, but that's not enough." 

 "No," Ray corrected. "Not like a brother. I love you like a lover." 

 Hopeful blue eyes searched his face. "How can I believe you, Ray? I want
to, but .." Ben's voice trailed off. 

 In response, Ray stepped forward, took Benny in his arms, and kissed him
passionately. The Canadian pulled away. "Ray, we already slept together
and you still said you didn't love me that way. I don't want another one
night stand." He was afraid that his words were cruel, but he had to
convey to his friend how his rejection had hurt. 

 The Italian fell to his knees and took Fraser's hand in both of his.
"Benny, I was so wrong that day. I was scared, and confused, and grieving
for Irene. I didn't want to love someone else. Losing Irene hurt so much,
I didn't want to take that risk again. And then I did lose you. It wasn't
until you weren't around that I realized how much I really do love you. I
don't want any more one-nighters. I want us to be together permanently.
Can you forgive me? Can you give me another chance?" There were tears in
his eyes as he begged Fraser to forgive him. 

 "Oh, Ray..." Benny pulled the Italian to his feet. He wrapped his arms
around him, rejoicing in the feel of his lover in his arms once more. "I
love you, Ray. I love you so much." 

 "I love you too, Benny," Ray said through his tears. "I'm so sorry that I
hurt you." 

 "That's in the past now, Ray," answered his partner. "Let's forget it." 

 "Then you won't leave?" Ray asked, still fearful. 

 "I won't take the assignment in Kosovo, but I still have to attend the
information session. It's too late to cancel. My train leaves in just a
few hours." 

 Ray's face fell. Was he still going to lose Benny? Seeing his expression,
Ben tried to reassure him. 

 "It's only for a few days," he said. "I'll come back. We still have some
time before I leave if you want to say goodbye properly." 

 The grin on Ray's face was his answer as Benny led him toward the
bedroom. 

 At the train station, Ray clung to his lover for as long as he could.
"Ray, I have to get on the train," Ben admonished. "You have to let go of
my hand." Diefenbaker whimpered. "Diefenbaker, you're staying with Ray,"
Ben instructed the wolf. 

 "You're really coming back?" Ray could still not quite believe that he
and Fraser were lovers, that they had made a commitment to be together
permanently. 

 Fraser took a quick look around before giving Ray a brief kiss on the
lips. "I'll be back before you know it," he promised. "I love you." Then
he boarded the train and was soon out of sight. "I love you, too," Ray
whispered to the departing train. 

 Ray went home, Diefenbaker in tow, and sat around doing nothing. He knew
he should be happy now that he and Benny had fixed things between them,
but part of him was still scared that Benny wasn't coming back. Then, late
that night, the phone rang. 

 "Hello, Ray," said a most welcome voice. 

 "Benny! It's good to hear your voice," Ray sighed. 

 "I can't talk very long, but I wanted to tell you that I miss you," said
Benny. 

 "I miss you, too. Wish you were here." 

 "I wish I were there too. I'll be back soon, though. Tomorrow morning
I'll inform my superiors that I am withdrawing my application to go
overseas." 

 "How long before they let you come back here?" Ray asked. 

 "I don't know. I may have to stay another day, but I'll let you know as
soon as soon as I can. I have to go now - someone else wants to use the
phone." 

 Trust Benny not to have a room with a phone. "When will I hear from you
again?" 

 "Tomorrow. I really do have to go now. I have to get up early tomorrow
morning. I love you, Ray." 

 "I love you too, Benny. I'm counting the minutes till you get back." 

 "Goodnight, Ray." 

 " 'Night, Benny." 

 Ray hung up the phone reluctantly. But he felt better now that he'd
talked to Benny. Benny still loved him. He was coming back. 

 Ray fell asleep, dreaming of his lover. 

 It was a long twenty four hours before the phone rang again. Ray had
driven his family crazy by not letting any of them near it all day.
Finally the call that he had been eagerly awaiting came. Ray practically
pounced on the phone. "Benny?" he answered breathlessly. 

 "Hello, Ray. How are you?" 

 "I'm great now that I can talk to you, but I'd be even better if you were
here. When are you coming back?" 

 "Tomorrow. I cashed in my train ticket and bought a plane ticket so that
I could be back sooner. Will you meet me at the airport?" 

 "Benny, you shouldn't have spent all that money on a plane ticket," Ray
scolded. He could practically hear Fraser smiling on the other end of the
line. 

 "The money doesn't matter. What matters is coming back to you as soon as
possible," answered his lover. "Now, will you meet me at the airport?" 

 "I'll be there with bells on. What time?" 

 Benny laughed. "What's so funny?" Ray wanted to know. 

 "I'm trying to imagine you with bells on, Ray." 

 "It's a saying, Benny. It means - " 

 "I know what it means," Ben interrupted. "I was just teasing you. My
flight is number 106 from Ottawa and it gets in to O'Hare at six p.m." 

 "Eighteen hours, then," said Ray. "Eighteen hours till I see you and then
we'll never be apart again." 

 "Not if I can help it," agreed Fraser. "Goodnight, Ray. I'll see you
tomorrow." 

 "I love you, Benny." 

 "I love you too." Then the phone call was over. 

 True to his word, exactly eighteen hours later Ray was standing at the
gate, waiting impatiently for his lover. And then, suddenly, Fraser was
there. He was out of uniform, wearing jeans, a sweater and a leather
jacket. He looked wonderful and Ray's heart leaped at the sight. 

 "Ray!" came Ben's exclamation as he spotted his partner. Then the Mountie
was in Ray's arms and they were hugging and kissing each other, not caring
who saw them. Few people noticed anyway, since everyone else was also
occupied with greeting loved ones coming off the planes. Ray removed a
small bell from his pocket. "Told you I'd be here with bells on," he said.


 Now that he had Benny with him, Ray wasn't going to let him go for an
instant. He held on to Fraser's hand as he went through customs. He
continued holding it as they drove to Fraser's apartment, despite Benny's
protests that it would make driving difficult. Diefenbaker was in the
Riviera waiting for them. 

 Then they finally were alone together. Ray held Benny at arm's length for
a few moments, just drinking in the sight of him. "I can't believe I
almost let you go, Benny. How could I have been so stupid?" 

 Ben leaned forward and kissed him. "Forget all of that, Ray. What matters
is that we're together now, and we'll be together forever. I love you,
Ray." 

 "I love you too, Benny. Can I stay here with you tonight?" 

 "Do you need me to keep the Boogie Man away?" Ben asked in amusement. 

 "If he knows what's good for him, he won't come near us," Ray answered. 

 END 

 </PRE>