CHRISTMAS WISH   Okay-standard stuff here-All characters of Due
South belong to Alliance I am simply borrowing them, though I wish I could
keep them they are not mine.  Please do not reproduce or copy this story
in anyway without my permission yada yada yada 

A Christmas story with our two boys. Guest appearance with Monica from
Touched by an Angel. Let me know what you think! Rated PG for some
language and HC 

By: Amethyst feedback  

Christmas Wish 

 
 
 
 
 

         "Do you have an idea what it is you are shopping for, Ray?"
Fraser asked as he and the blond detective wound their way through the
busy mall. They had just gotten off work, so Fraser still wore his
uniform, but Ray was dressed in his usual attire, jeans, maroon sweatshirt
and black leather jacket. 
         "Yah, Fraser." Ray assured as he narrowly avoided a hurrying
woman, bent on running over anyone in her path to get that special gift
for her kid. "Shouldn't take long. I just been so busy I haven't had a
chance to get all my shoppin' done, ya know?" Fraser nodded and resisted
telling his partner that he should have done all his Christmas shopping
back in October and early November, to avoid the crowds; as Fraser himself
had, but Kowalski had a habit of putting of things he didn't like, and the
cop did not like shopping. 
         "Who exactly are you buying for, Ray?' Fraser inquired politely
and Ray shot him a playful grin. 
         "No no, can't ask questions like dat dis time of year, Fraser."
He scolded, a mannequin in a lingerie shop caught his eye and he stopped
in front of the window, completely forgetting the conversation he had
started. Fraser shook his head. 
         "Ray. Ray. Ray. Ray!" 
         "What?" Ray finally responding and turning his attention back to
the Mountie. 
         "You were saying, Ray?" he prompted and Ray gave him a confused
look. 
         "About what?" 
         "Asking questions this time of the year, Ray." Fraser supplied
patiently, knowing it would take a few seconds for the detective's over
active mind to get back to it's original track. 
         "Umm...oh, yah!" Ray grinned and they continued their walk. "Yah
can't go fishin' for what I got ya." Fraser gave him an innocent look. 
     "Was I doing that, Ray?' he questioned. 
         "You know you were, buddy, so don't deny it." Ray taunted.
"Besides, I already got yer gift, bought it months ago." Fraser's eyebrows
rose, perhaps his assumption of Kowalski's procrastination was in error. 
         "So then who are we shopping for?" he repeated his earlier
question, but Ray's mind had already wandered away again as he spied a
pretty woman walking past them. Fraser sighed and waited once again.
Sometimes having a conversation with his partner was like surfing on a
turbulent ocean, you just had to wait to catch the next wave when the tide
turned your way again. Eventually Ray had decided he'd ogled enough women
and continued walking, as always picking up where he left off. 
         "My Mum." He replied, ticking the names off his fingers. "Frannie
and Welsh." Fraser nodded complacently.   "My Mum wants one of dem bread
makers, so I can pick dat up in a store around the corner from him.
Frannie I'll probably get her dat bracelet I saw her lookin' at in a
catalog at the station a couple of weeks ago and Welsh I'm getting' him
one of dem ships in a bottle thingy's  I over heard him tellin' Dewey he
collects them." 
         "I am sure they will enjoy your selection's very much, Ray."
Fraser agreed impressed at the other man's ingenuity in finding out what
his friends would like. Ray picked up pieces of information that was filed
away for future use, like Fraser picked up on unique scents. "How did you
find out what your mother wanted?" 
         "Dad told me." Ray replied simply Fraser frowned. 
         "Then why didn't your Father buy her the bread maker?" he asked
curious and Ray gave him a, get-real look. 
         "Ya don't buy yer wife appliances fer Christmas, Fraser." He
explained. 
         "You don't?" 
         "No, nothin' useful-dat stuff ya buy 'em ya know, just ta buy em'
cause she needs em or whatever." Ray lectured. "Ya gotta buy yer wife
special things fer Christmas and Valentines and anniversaries, romantic
things, ya know?" 
         "I was not aware of that, Ray." Fraser admitted as they stopped
at a jewelry store and Ray went inside. "I do appreciate you telling me
that, Ray and should I have a wife in the future I will endeavor to follow
your wisdom." Ray nodded and glanced through the counter displays. So what
is your father getting for your Mother?" Ray grinned back at him as he
leaned over one of the counters to eye the bracelets below. 
         "You sure are a nosey Parker, Fraser." He teased ignoring the
Mounties's innocent look. "He's takin' her on a cruise over the
holiday's." 
         "I am sure she will enjoy that very much." Fraser surmised. "Then
are you going to be alone for the holiday's Ray?" Ray shrugged and asked
the salesperson to retrieve the dainty looking tennis bracelet he had
selected. 
             "She's always wanted ta go on one." He commented as he
examined the bracelet carefully then offered the woman his credit card. 
         "A wonderful choice, Sir." She smiled at him as she moved to zip
his card through the machine. "Your wife will be a very happy woman come
Christmas morning." 
         "It's fer my sister." Ray remarked. "Hang on a minute." She
paused and lowered his card as he bent to examine a small gold locket in
the display case. "Lemmie see that." He pointed it out and she pulled the
locket out of the box and offered it to him. Ray glanced over it, opened
it to see where the pictures went, then nodded and handed it back to her.
"I'll take dat too, please." The sales woman smiled and added it to his
total then charged his card and gave him the slip to sign as she placed
the items in individual gift boxes and wrapped them in a small bag. 
         "Thank you, Sir." She smiled. "Merry Christmas." She turned to
Fraser. "Can I help you with anything sir?" Her voice practically purred
for him. "For that special someone?" Fraser shook his head and backed away
so quickly Ray had to struggle not to laugh. 
         "Ah...no...no thank you kindly I am with her..ahh him...ah good
day." Fraser plopped his hat back on his head and followed Ray out of the
shop. 
         "Another narrow escape for Big Red, from a willing female and the
crowd goes wild!" Ray crowed and Fraser glared at him. 
         "That isn't funny, Ray." He informed coolly, but he wasn't really
mad at his partner. At least Kowalski just laughed at the situations; Ray
Vecchio always complained or teased Fraser unmercifully about his constant
run ins with the opposite sex. American women were so pushy sometimes, far
to forward for Fraser to ever be comfortable around them. Ray had started
to say something else when the breath was literally knocked out of him as
he was almost bowled over by a munchkin cowboy. Fraser caught Ray and Ray
caught the boy before they both ended up on the floor as a harried
brunette hurried up to them. 
         "Jared!" she exclaimed angrily as she caught up to her runaway
son and caught him by the arm securely. "I told you not to do that." She
offered Ray and Fraser an embarrassed smile as she knelt beside her son.
"I am so sorry, he isn't usually this wild, but he wants to see Santa and
he saw your red uniform and well..." Ray chuckled and looked over at the
Mountie. 
         "Perfectly alright, Ma'am." Fraser offered kindly. "It happens
all the time." Ray couldn't help grinning at that as the woman turned to
him. 
         "I really am sorry, did he hurt you?" Ray shook his head. 
         "No, just surprised me." He assured and winked at the boy.
"Mighty fast little guy, didn't even see him comin'." Jared smiled shyly
up at him. 
         "You need to apologize to these men, Jared." His mother told him
firmly and the boy did as he was told, unable to meet their eyes while
doing so. Ray's heart went out to him and he knelt to face the child. 
         "Tell ya what, Jared." He reasoned. "I'll forgive ya for almost
knockin' me on my..." He glanced up at the woman. "er...on da floor if
you'll give me a hand wit somethin'?" Jared glanced up at his mother
doubtfully, who seemed to consider it his choice, then back at the
detective curious. Finally he nodded. "See, I wanna get an ice cream, ya
know one of dem real big sundae things, with different flavors, hot fudge
and sprinkles?' Jared nodded wide-eyed. "Well, I can't eat one of those
all by myself, so if you'd help me, I'd really owe ya one." Again Jared
glanced up at his mother for approval and she nodded, her lips twitching. 
         "Okay." He agreed shyly and offered his hand to Ray. 
         "Greatness." The detective declared and handing his bag to Fraser
to hold, as he offered the woman a smile.  "We'll be right back, Mum." 
Fraser smiled as they walked off toward the Dairy Queen a few feet away,
then introduced himself to the woman beside him. 
         "I'm Anita Porter." She smiled and shook the Mounties hand. "Your
friend is very sweet." Fraser nodded as he watched Ray lift the boy onto
the counter to choose the ice cream he wanted. 
         "It is mostly due to his enormous sugar intake I believe." Fraser
reasoned and she laughed. 
         "Is he this easy around all children?" she asked and Fraser bit
his lip to keep from laughing, remembering the three children of the
female bounty hunter that had handcuffed the detective to a post in the
interview room at the station. 
         "Not always, no." he admitted, tongue in cheek, "But mostly is
quite accommodating toward them." Ray of course was sometimes just a big
kid himself, so why shouldn't he get along with the younger generation? A
moment later, the blond returned with Jared, holding a large waffle cone
in each hand. 
        "We decided to get deese instead." Ray explained handing Fraser a
chocolate flavored ice cream as Jared offered his Mother a strawberry one,
then licked at his own cookie dough flavored; Ray's was chocolate Mocha. 
         "Thank you kindly, Ray." Fraser returned as Jared pulled at his
mother's shirt. 
         "Yes darling?" she inquired smiling down at him. She noticed him
glance over at Ray again, who nodded discreetly, before speaking to his
mother. 
         "I promise not to run away from you any more, Mama." The little
boy vowed solemnly. "I don't wanna get lost or make you sad, so I'll even
hold your hand if ya want, when we're out." Anita gave Ray a surprised
look. 
         "We had a little chat about runnin' around crowded malls." He
explained. "Right, kid?" Jared nodded. 
        "Ray's a policeman, Mama an' he says if I ever do get lost I
have'ta look for a policeman an' have him find you, but I won't get lost
Mama because I'm gonna stay right beside you." Anita hugged her son,
careful of the ice cream he held. 
         "That sounds like a great idea, honey." She agreed once again
glancing at the detective. "Thank you." Ray shrugged. 
         "No, problem. Merry Christmas." He turned to his partner. "Pitter
patter, Fraser-let's get at'er." He remarked as he and Fraser both
finished their ice creams and he gave Ray back his bag of shopping. Anita
rose to her feet and caught the Mounties's arm. 
         "Could I...um...could I have your number or something?" 
         "You can reach me at the Canadian Consulate, Ma'am." He informed,
then glanced knowingly toward the blond already a few feet ahead of him
"And Detective Vecchio can be reached at the 27th Precinct Police
Department." She smiled shyly and released his arm. 
         "Thank you, Merry Christmas." 
         "Merry Christmas to you as well. Have a nice evening." He donned
his hat again and hurried to catch up with his partner. 
  

        "You have to come Ray." insisted Francesca Vecchio, as she
gathered her belongings from her desk, preparing to leave the 27th
precinct for the day. The man posing as her brother shook his head
adamantly as he shrugged into his jacket then helped her on with hers. 
        "I told'ya Frannie." he protested. "I ain't a church person- they
make me nervous." 
        "But it's Christmas Mass, Ray." Francesca pressed as they headed
out of the station to the parking lot behind the building where both their
cars were parked. "My brother has never missed the midnight service at
Christmas, it will look strange if you don't go." 
        "It will look strange if I do go, Frannie." he insisted as he
stopped beside her car and waited for her to fish out her keys, glancing
around them warily as was his habit-he didn't stop being a cop just
because his shift ended. "The people at da church know da real Ray, dey'd
get suspicious if I showed up. Face it, I don't even look like him." 
        "They won't have to know who you are, Ray..." Frannie started to
explain as she unlocked her car and Ray held the door open for her,
pouncing on her opening. 
        "If dey don't know who I am, what does it mater if I ain't dere?" 
He reasoned and she sighed in exasperation. 
        "Fraser is coming." 
        "Good fer Fraser." 
        "Ray, please." she pleaded quietly. "There will be some people
there that will expect my brother to show, and they don't necessarily know
what he looks like- they just know the whole Vecchio family attends." She
met his gaze gently. "Ma wants ya to come, please?" 
        "No, Frannie." Ray refused softly, as she slid in behind the wheel
of her small sports car. "I'm sorry but I can't." She shook her head as he
closed the door and headed to his own car. He waited until she had started
to pull out of the lot, then he got inside his own vehicle and headed for
home. 
        Fraser was out of town on Consulate Business and wouldn't be back
until tomorrow, so Ray decided to grab some take out and spend a quiet
evening at home. Upon his arrival, Diefenbaker, whom he had agreed to
watch while Fraser was out of town, immediately greeted him. He quickly
removed his jacket and holsters, making himself comfortable, fed his
turtle and put some more food and water down for the wolf, 
Promising to walk him later, then turned the lights on his small table top
tree that his Mother had set up one day while he was at work. There were
three packages under the tree, one for Fraser, one for Dief, the other was
for him from his parents; again his mother had left it. 
        He picked up the guide and flipped through it as he listened to
the messages on his machine. Two were from his Mother who was worrying
about how he was spending the holidays, since they had gone back to
Arizona to stay with their friends for Christmas. One was from Stella, who
had heard the Kowalski's would be out of town and offered to let Ray come
to a dinner party she was holding Christmas Eve night. Ray didn't consider
that offer, knowing it was only her conscience making her call him at all.
The last one was Fraser, telling Ray what time his flight got in tomorrow
and if he could pick him up at the airport. Ray erased his messages and
dropped the guide-nothing good on, so he'd eat his food then take Dief for
a walk and maybe rent some videos. 

        Ray lay in his bed that night, unable to sleep, despite the warmth
and companionship Dief was offering by curling up next to him in the bed.
Was he depressed? He didn't think so, he'd spent the holidays alone plenty
of times before and it never really bothered him, and well, except that
first year after he and Stella divorced. He didn't know if he was lonely
or just bored. Tomorrow he'd pick Fraser up and take him to the Consulate,
maybe have a quick meal with him, then drop him at the Vecchio's for
dinner and mass. They had invited him as well, of course, but as usual Ray
refused all invitations, it was just the way he was. He wanted no one's
pity, he was a bachelor and he lived alone, spent holidays alone, and that
was okay with him. He didn't know why so many people made such a big deal
out of Christmas; it was just another day to Ray. He was startled when his
phone rang and he quickly reached for it, wondering who would be calling
him this late. 
        "Yah?" he greeted curious. 
        "Raymond?" inquired Mrs. Vecchio's soft voice and Ray dropped back
on the pillows, swallowing a groan. 
        "Yah, Mrs...er..Ma." It still took him a bit to get used to
calling the older Italian woman Ma, despite his assignment. 
        "Are you sleeping dear? Did I wake you?" 
        "No, I wasn't asleep, Ma." he assured quickly. "What can I do fer
ya?" 
        "My Francesca says you will not be joining us tomorrow and I would
like to know why?" Ray sighed. 
        "I already told her...I already explained ta Frannie, Ma." he
commented. "I ain't a church person." 
        "That does not mean that you cannot come to dinner, Raymond." she
admonished. "We will not make you pray for your food if you so not wish
to." Ray smiled a little. "Bentino will be there and since my real son is
so far away I must have as many of my children around me at this time. I
am an old woman and set in my ways, but 
I wish for all of my loved ones to be around my table at Christmas." 
        "I ain't yer real son, Ma." Ray reminded quietly and he heard her
tsk at him. 
        "You and Bentino!" she exclaimed and let loose a string of
Italian. Finally in English she continued. "I forgive you Raymond because
you are not Italian, as I forgave Bentino when he did this same thing. You
and he are like my own and I want you near me, with the family. They care
for you both and it is time to share with your loved ones. If you must
believe me to be a crazy old woman than do so but I wish you to come to
dinner tomorrow and I will not take no for an answer." 
        "I appreciate yer invitin' me Ma, but I..." 
        "Have you other plans?" 
        "No, but..." 
        "Then you will come. "Mrs. Vecchio decided. "I mean it Raymond.
You may not be my blood but I will have no trouble putting you over my
knee if you refuse any longer. You will come to dinner with Bentino,
perhaps stay the night so that in the morning we can exchange gifts and I
will not allow anyone to mention the mass to you. Now you will come, yes?"
Ray sighed. How did you fight a woman like this? 
        "Okay, ma." he conceded. "I give. You win. I'll stay fer dinner."
He heard her gentle chuckle vibrate over the line. 
        "I knew you would not hurt an old woman's feelings, Raymond." she
almost purred and Ray laughed. 
        "Yer not old, Ma." he insisted. "Yer beautiful an' if I thought I
had a chance wit ya..." 
        "Stop such nonsense!" she exclaimed but he could tell she was
smiling at his flirtation. "Save your flattery for the pretty ones your
age, Raymond. I will see you tomorrow night. Sweet dreams my pet." 
        "Night Ma." Ray returned and promptly hung up, still smiling.
Amazingly he drifted off to sleep rather quickly after that. 
  

         Ray was late picking up Fraser because of a case he was working
on, but the Mountie had waited on him patiently, as it was only a few
minutes, and soon they were on their way to the Consulate. 
         "Are you attending the Christmas dinner at the Vecchio's, Ray?"
he inquired as he watched his partner maneuver through the crowded
streets, everyone was out doing last minute shopping and traffic as a
mess. 
         "I was gonna, but I dunno If I'm gonna get da chance, Frase." Ray
commented as he turned a corner. "I'm gonna let you get changed den I'll
drop you at Frannie's, on my way back to da precinct." Fraser frowned. 
         "Is it something I can assist with, Ray?" He asked readily, not
wanting his friend to be working alone through Christmas. 
         "No, I got it covered, just y'know some loose ends." Ray assured
as they pulled up to the Consulate just as Ray's cell phone rang.
"Vecchio." He paused for a moment then tossed the phone to Fraser as the
Mountie released Diefenbaker from the back seat. "Fer you." 
         "This is Constable Fraser." He greeted politely as they headed up
the steps to the Consulate, after Ray retrieved Fraser's bag from the
trunk. "Ah, hello, Francesca." Ray smirked at the sudden nervous look in
his friend's eyes as Fraser unlocked the large doors and they stepped
inside. Turnbull and Thatcher had closed the Consulate for the holidays
and so were not there. "Certainly, I will. Indeed. Thank you kindly
Francesca, I will see you then." He pressed the end button and exchanged
the phone for the large duffel that Ray was holding. 
         "What'd Frannie want?" he asked curious as he slid the phone back
in his pocket and followed Fraser to his office. 
         "She asked if I would pick up a bottle of wine for dinner, Tony
apparently forgot when they asked him earlier." Fraser replied as he
dropped his bag in the corner and started to remove his uniform while Ray
closed the door and turned toward the wall politely to examine some
parchment of Canada hanging there. " She also asked that I remind you of
your promise to Mrs. Vecchio, Ray." 
         "I didn't promise anything, Fraser." Ray stated automatically as
his partner changed. "I said I would come, but now I gotta get something
else outta da way first." 
         "Ray." Fraser scolded and the detective turned to find Fraser
dressed in gray wool dress slacks and a red turtleneck sweater, damn but
he could dress fast. 
         "No, really, Fraser." Ray implied and Fraser was tempted to
believe him. "I'll try ta get by later on, but tell' em not to wait on
me." 
         "You promise to come by if you can, Ray?" Fraser questioned
firmly and the blond nodded. That was good enough for the Mountie, so far
the detective had never broken his word to him. "Alright, I will explain
to Mrs. Vecchio, but she will be very upset if you don't show, Ray." 
         "I'll do what I can." Ray vowed and meant it. He really wasn't
trying to get out of dinner, something in one of his cases had come up and
he just needed to take care of it. "Ya ready?" Fraser nodded, shrugged
into his bomber jacket and grabbed his Stetson. He picked up a bag that
had been placed at the end of the bed, which Ray assumed contained gifts
for the Vecchio's. 
         "Could you recommend a good wine, Ray?" Fraser asked as the three
were settled in the GTO once more. Ray nodded. 
         "Yah, I know a place, I'll run in an' get it fer you buddy." 
         "Thank you kindly, Ray." Fraser returned. Ray was driving slower
than usual, out of respect for the conditions, though Fraser trusted his
friends driving skills undoubtedly. They stopped to purchase a couple of
bottles of wine, then headed toward the street where the Vecchio's lived.
Ray pulled out a small wrapped package from his back seat and tossed it to
Fraser. "What's this?" 
        "Yer Christmas gift ya dope." Ray grinned, never taking his eyes
from the road. "I wanted ta give it to ya here instead of...well, I ain't
much fer crowd's Frase." The Mountie nodded in understanding; Ray could be
a very private person at times. 
        "Would you like me to open it now, Ray?" 
        "No, Fraser." Ray retorted sarcastically, but with a grin to
remove the sting from his words. "I want ya ta hold on to it and open it
next forth of July. Of course I want ya ta open it now, why else would I
give it to ya?" Fraser hid his smile and started to carefully unwrap the
package. 
        "If you insist, Ray." he returned calmly, receiving a mild glare
from his partner. Fraser pulled the paper away and opened the top of the
heavy box, then gasped as he pulled out the snow globe. 
         The base was like a snow-covered mountaintop that had Northwest
Territories of Canada etched in sparkling gold across them. The glass held
a Mountie and a wolf standing beside a small log cabin with a team of sled
dogs behind them, in a frozen tundra. It looked so much like home that for
a moment Fraser felt tears form in his eyes as if he were almost
transported back. Ray was glancing at him warily, gagging his reaction,
but the Canadian remained silent as he continued to stare at the scene in
his hands. 
        "It's one of dem snow globes." Ray offered, feeling he had to
explain it, since Fraser was still saying nothing. "I gotta friend on the
east side dat make's em and I asked him ta order me one from the northwest
Areas, ya know fer the base and den I had him add da other stuff, da wolf
and da cabin, ya told me about yer Dad's cabin." Still Fraser said
nothing. "Ya turn it upside down and it looks like it's snowin'." 
        "Ray I..." Fraser began, finally finding his voice. He didn't know
what to say how to express how much the gift meant to him. The very idea
that Ray had gone to so much trouble, he knew the globes were not by an
any means inexpensive, but to have one practically custom made would be
very pricey indeed. Ray took his speechlessness for a sign that he didn't
like the gift. 
        "Ya don't gotta keep it, Fraser.' he quickly insisted. "I mean, it
is kinda a kid's gift really, I just thought..." 
        "No, Ray!" Fraser exclaimed quickly cradling the globe in one hand
as he reached across and placed the other on Ray's shoulder. "I...I love
it! I...I just...it's so..wonderful I don't know what to say. Thank you
very much, Ray. I shall treasure it always." Ray gave him a dubious
glance, then finally smiled and nodded as he decided the Canadian was
speaking the truth. 
        "Good." he commented as he pulled into the Vecchio's driveway.
"I'm glad ya like it Frase." Ray was surprised when, the moment he
switched off the engine,  Francesca and Mrs. Vecchio hurried out the door
toward them. 
         "You are here!" Mrs. Vecchio exclaimed delighted. "And early, so
nice we can all visit." 
         "I can't stay, Ma." Ray announced as Fraser let Dief out of the
car and he rolled down his window to hear the older woman. He watched her
face fall in despair and was quick to explain. "I'm droppin Fraser off
early because I have ta go back to da precinct, and I'll be late fer
dinner." 
         "Then you are still spending Christmas with us, Raymond?" She
asked hopefully ignoring the glare Francesca was giving him. 
         "Sure, I'll be back," he promised.  "Just, y'know later, so don't
hold dinner fer me or anything." 
         "Are you sure I cannot assist you, Ray?" Fraser offered again.
"Perhaps we could get through faster if both..." 
         "I gotta go." He refused with a shake of his head, then to Mrs.
Vecchio. "I promise I will come by tonight, okay?" She nodded, also sure
of his word, as Fraser had been then stood back and allowed him to back
out of the driveway. Francesca folded her arms across her chest. 
         "He won't be back." She stated angrily and Mrs. Vecchio reached
across to smack her arm. 
         "He promised me, Francesca and Raymond never breaks his
promises." She stated as they headed into the house, Fraser gently taking
her arm to keep her from slipping on the icy path. He would come out and
shovel it, to keep anyone from falling, as soon as he dropped his things
off inside. 
         "He's not our Ray, Ma." Francesca insisted once inside the warmth
of the house. "Just because my brother never broke a promise to you
doesn't mean..." 
         "We will speak no more or this, Francesca." Her mother decided
firmly. "Raymond has a good heart and he would not intentionally hurt
anyone by telling lies." 
         "He's a walking lie, Ma." Francesca stated. "His whole life here
is a lie because he is pretending to be Ray, your son. He's only playing a
part, don't you get it? He doesn't care about us, not like Ray does, he's
just doing his job." 
         "That will be enough Francesca!" Mrs. Vecchio declared angrily
and even Fraser jumped a little but Francesca was too far-gone to stop. 
         "NO!" she cried out. "It isn't enough Ma. His name is Stanley
Kowalski, he is not Ray Vecchio, and I don't care that he has to pretend
to be my brother, I don't want him to be in our lives! He's a fake and a
fraud and I hate him!" Fraser flinched in shock as Mrs. Vecchio's hand
made contact with her daughter's cheek, the older woman was shaking with
rage and Fraser discreetly found the shovel in the hall closet and stepped
back outside to give privacy to the family argument. 
         "You will not speak of hate in this house!" she proclaimed. "Your
brother made his choice, he did what he felt he had to do and there is
nothing we can do about it but pray he will be safe and come home to us
soon. That young man that has taken Raimundo's place had given up
everything to protect your brother from harm, a man he does not even know.
He has assumed the roll of care giver and head of this family." 
         "He's not..." Francesca cried as tears rolled down her cheeks. 
         "He will be considered the head of this household as long as he
holds your brother's name, Francesca." Mrs. Vecchio decided. "He signed
Raimundo's name on the insurance to get us this new home when ours burned,
he co-sighed the loan for your car, he..." 
         "But he has to do that for his cover, Ma!" Francesca wailed. Mrs.
Vecchio stared at her daughter for a long moment, when she spoke again her
voice was subdued, even a little sad. 
         "That is true, little one." She admitted. "He does sign your
brother's papers and take care of legalities for us, but he did not need
to assume your brother's responsibilities, as he has done. He did not need
to purchase a new water heater for us when ours broke, he did not need to
come by and help your brother in law Tony fix his car last week on his own
time, without desired payment for his service. He did not have to find out
your niece and nephew's birthdays as he has done and sent them each a gift
and he did not need to help Maria put up the Christmas lights, as Raimundo
used to do for us." She took a deep breath. "This man has accepted that we
are Raymond Vecchio's family and as his family we are his responsibility
and he must take care of us. He asks for nothing in return Francesca,
nothing, but the knowledge that he is making it easier for us with your
brother gone and perhaps helps us to miss him a little less." 
        "But Ma..." Francesca sobbed. 
         "To say that you hate this man is a tragedy, little one." Mrs.
Vecchio continued. "For he has done nothing to deserve your hate, other
than not being your brother." 
         "I..I miss, Ray, Ma!" Francesca sobbed and was instantly taken
into her Mother's embrace. 
         "I know you do, my darling." She whispered. "We all do, but there
is nothing we can do about that now. It is Christmas, time to forgive."
She wiped her daughter's tears. "Forgive this man for not being your
brother, Francesca, open your heart to him, for he deserves your love and
your respect." Francesca nodded and wiped at her tears. She had seen
Fraser leave and felt terrible that he had witnessed her shameful
behavior, so she quickly got a cup of hot cider, pulled on her coat and
stepped outside. 
         Fraser had removed his coat and hat, it was settled against the
porch railing, as he continued to clear the path. He had it mostly done
already and for a moment Francesca just stood and watched him, for once
not having the courage to approach him. Finally he stopped and turned,
heading back to the porch. He lowered his eyes from the red mark on her
cheek where her mother had slapped her, as he set the shovel against the
stoop and stepped up to her. 
         "I...I brought you some..er cider." She offered. "To..to warm you
up." He took the cup from her graciously. 
         "Thank you kindly, Francesca." He replied quietly taking a sip as
he leaned against the framework. Francesca continued to ramble. 
         "I...Ma told Tony to clear the walk, but you know him-it takes
and act of God to get him outta that chair." Fraser nodded but said
nothing. "We appreciate you doing it, Frase, Ma will probably give ya a
kiss and stuff fer it." 
         "Most likely." Fraser agreed calmly, as he continued to stare out
at the lighted houses on the street. "But then, I would do almost anything
for one of your Mother's kisses or hugs, Francesca." Francesca smiled a
little. 
         "Me too." She revealed shyly. "Um..about what I said. I..I hope
you don't think...I mean I like Ray okay I just..." 
         "I miss Ray too, Francesca." Fraser offered gently as his eyes
finally settled on her and she lifted tear filled eyes to his. She
hesitated for perhaps only a second, before moving into his embrace, glad
for once that the Mountie didn't stiffen up or push her away. 
         "You understand, don't you Benton?" she sniffed and Fraser
nodded, his free arm coiling around her as the other still held his cider.

         "I do." He agreed. "But please don't take it out on Ray...er
Stan. He is doing his job, but he...he really does care about all of you,
like you were his own." Francesca nodded. 
         "I know." She sighed finally pulling away, not wanting to push
her luck and have the Mountie grow uncomfortable. "Do you think he'll come
back tonight?" 
         "I believe he will do his best, Francesca." Fraser stated as she
shivered slightly in the cool night air. "Let's go back inside where it is
warm." She smiled slightly. 
          "Being with you makes me plenty warm, Frase." She teased and
bowed her head at going to far as she saw the blush rise in his cheeks,
but instead of his usual stammering he just gave her an indulgent smile
and collected his hat and coat. 
         "The feeling is mutual, Francesca." He assured, surprising her as
he opened the front door and waited for her to enter. 

         Ray walked up to the house, brightly decorated with Christmas
allure, and raised his hand to knock on the door, just as it was thrown
open by Francesca, who threw herself into his arms and pressed her lips to
his in a quick but inviting kiss. Ray almost slipped in the fresh snow on
the steps as he struggled to hold on to his bearings and the tiny woman in
his arms. 
        "Francesca!" Mrs. Vecchio admonished from behind and Frannie
finally slipped from Ray's arms. "Let him come inside it is cold. You will
chase him away before he has eaten." 
        "But Ma!" whined Francesca winking at Ray and Fraser, who stood
just inside the door behind then. "It's tradition!" Ray glanced up at the
mistletoe where she pointed as she stepped back and pulled him inside
finally. Fraser seemed to be struggling with a smile at his partner's
sudden color and Ray glared at him. The detective looked quite sharp in
black dress slacks, a red silk shirt with black leather tie and his black
leather waist jacket. His hair was still a little on the wild side, but it
was what made him unique and Fraser was quite impressed that the blond had
gone to such trouble with his appearance. 
        "Warn a guy next time, Frannie." he muttered as Maria handed him a
tissue slyly, to wipe her sister's lipstick from his lips. Francesca
giggled. 
        "Where's the fun in that?" she remarked and Ray shook his head. 
        "You'll have to forgive my sister." Maria commented as Ray handed
her the wine he had brought, which Fraser had accidentally left in his car
earlier. "She gets like this every Christmas." Ray grunted and was wrapped
in a warm hug from Mrs. Vecchio as Fraser offered to take his coat and
hang it up. 
        "I am so glad that you have decided to join us." she gushed
kissing both his cheeks. "Dinner is ready come and sit." 
         "I'm sorry I'm late, I got here..." Ray began but was silenced by
Mrs. Vecchio with a wave of her hand. 
         "You are here and that is all that matters." She stated warmly. 
Everyone drifted into the dining room, where the table was piled high with
turkey and all the fixings. Ray greeted Tony, who decided to grace him
with their presence from where he had been perched by the TV in the living
room. Fraser helped Maria settle the kids in their seats and Ray offered
to pour the wine, omitting his and Fraser's glass purposefully, as Marie
gave the kids milk. Then they all settled at the table, after Francesca
fetched water for Ray and Fraser, then bowed their heads for grace. 
        "You just thought you wouldn't have to pray fer yer supper."
Francesca teased Ray as she took hold of his hand and Fraser's who sat on
the other side of her. Fraser offered her a small smile, the woman was
trying very hard to make up for her earlier behavior, even though Ray had
no clue what had been said about him. Ray grinned when Ma shot her
daughter a reproving look, and Francesca immediately bowed her head. 
        "Bentino, would you say the blessing please." Mrs. Vecchio
requested quietly and Fraser complied with a soft moving prayer of thanks.

        During the meal, everyone made small talk, except Ray, who was
strangely quiet, answering only questions directed solely at him. He
wasn't eating very much and Fraser noticed he was using his left hand to
eat, which was odd because Ray was right handed. The detective seemed more
interested in watching Maria's daughter pick at her vegetables beside him.
He leaned down and whispered in her ear. 
        "What's wrong?" She looked up at him sadly. 
        "I don't like these kind." she sighed contritely and he held back
a smile. 
        "You like turkey, right?" 
        "Oh yes." 
        "And dressing?" 
        "Sure." 
        "Want me to show you a trick I use when I have'ta eat something I
don't like?" he asked softly and she nodded her head intrigued. Unaware
that the anyone was watching, because of the volume of noise at the table,
Ray took her fork and took some of her turkey,  a few vegetables and some
dressing and offered it to her. She gave him a skeptical look and he
smiled. "Try it. If ya surround what ya don't like with foods ya do, you
can't taste it as much." She opened her mouth and accepted the offering,
chewed thoughtfully, then smiled at him delighted. He gave her back her
fork and she did the same thing as he, then took another mouthful. 
        "Cool." she remarked and Ray grinned and glanced up, surprised to
find everyone's attention on him. 
        "What?" he asked startled, receiving a warm smile from Maria and
Mrs. Vecchio. 
        "Would you like some more to eat, Raymond?' Ma asked also noticing
his plate was almost full still, and he declined. 
        "No thank you." he refused. "I'm good. It was delicious though."
She frowned for a moment then smiled brightly at him as he started to push
back from the table. 
         "Perhaps desert then?" she suggested knowing his weakness for
sweets and was disappointed when he shook his head and rose to his feet. 
          "I hate ta eat and run but..." 
         "You can't leave yet!" protested Francesca. "We all get to open
one of our gifts tonight and then the rest tomorrow." Ray shook his head
as he stood. 
        "I ain't stayin' fer dat, but thanks fer da meal, Ma. Merry
Christmas ta everybody." Mrs. Vecchio sent Fraser and imploring look and
the Mountie quickly excused himself and followed Ray out. Ray was acting
strangely and Fraser could swear that he saw the detective wince a time or
two during dinner. 
         "Ray. Ray. Ray!" Fraser called and finally the detective turned,
as he pulled his jacket from the hall closet. "Why are you rushing off? Ma
would like you to stay." 
         "I just gotta go, Frase." Ray replied shrugging into his jacket. 
         "Where are you going, Ray?' Fraser pressed. "I'll come with you."

         "No!" Ray refused adamantly. "Stay here with the Vecchio's, they
want you to stay. 
         "They want you to stay as well but you are leaving, so why
shouldn't I?" 
         "Don't pull yer physiology crap on me Fraser. I'm not in da
mood." 
         "Ray," Fraser sighed following the detective outside. "Why are
you so determined to be alone at Christmas? I have spent many holidays
alone and I know from experience that it is not pleasant." Ray regarded
him quietly, he had forgotten that Fraser had no family, accept the
Vecchio's, who more or less adopted him. But that was because of the Real
Ray Vecchio and Ray felt like a fraud, an interloper in the family and
Christmas made him feel more the outsider. He couldn't explain it he just
felt that way. He opened his mouth to explain when his cell phone rang. He
pulled it from his pocket and answered, again Fraser noticed he used his
left hand, rather awkwardly. 
         "Ray?" came Stella's voice on the other end. "Where are you? Are
you coming to my dinner party?" Ray swore quietly, he had forgotten to
call her back and decline, actually he just hadn't wanted her to talk him
into it. 
         "Hey, Stella, no I ain't comin'. "He refused quietly. "Sorry I
meant ta call ya and fergot." 
         "You have other plans then?" 
         "Yah, sure." 
         "Like what?" she demanded. "And don't lie to me Ray I can always
tell when you're lying to me." Ray grimaced. 
         "I'm at the Vecchio's havin' dinner, Stella." He commented, which
was true, she didn't have to know he was fixing to leave. 
         "Are you really?" she sounded pleased. "Good. I didn't want you
to be alone, Ray." 
         "Yah., I know, well I'm not, okay?" 
         "Okay." Agreed Stella convinced. "Ray?" 
         "Yah, Stella?" 
         "I...I hope you have a good Christmas, Ray." She finally said. 
         "You too Stella." He offered quietly. "I lo...Merry Christmas
Stella." 
         "Merry Christmas Ray." Stella returned disappointed. Ray hung up
and put his phone back in his pocket. Fraser regarded him quietly, wishing
he could help ease the pain his friend was going through. Fraser did not
like Stella much, she was always hurting Ray, and everyone could see how
much he still loved and adored her. 
         "If you could make one wish this Christmas, Ray." Fraser suddenly
asked. "What would it be?" Ray stared at him a moment, then shrugged. 
         "Peace on earth good will toward men, I suppose." Ray teased. "Of
course then we'd be outta a job." Fraser offered him a smile. "I bet I
know what yer wish would be, Frase." 
         "Do you, Ray?" Fraser asked curious. "And what would that be?" 
         "That Vecchio was back." Fraser stared at him surprised and he
smirked. "That would probably be every body here's Christmas wish," He
offered a wry smile. "Except maybe Frannie, she'd wish ta get you between
da sheets, Frase." Fraser blushed, and frowned. 
         "Though I do wish that Ray Vecchio could be home with us safe and
sound, Ray." He began seriously. "That is not my Christmas wish, nor do I
believe it would be absolutely everyone else's either. Ma, perhaps,
naturally she misses her son greatly, but we all wish for different
things. Ray shrugged. 
         "Admit it or not, ya miss Vecchio and I bet ya wish he were here
instead of me." 
         "I do miss Ray Vecchio." Fraser agreed easily. "But I do not wish
he were here instead of you. You are my friend and my partner, Ray,
regardless of the reasons you are here. I would miss you just as much if
you were no longer around." 
         "You really mean that, Fraser?" 
         "Of course, Ray." 
         "I don't understand why. All I do is remind everyone that Vecchio
isn't here." Ray sighed.  "How can anyone even stand ta be around me." 
         "You will no longer use my son as an excuse, Raymond." Mrs.
Vecchio suddenly interrupted and both men turned to her startled. She
walked up to Ray and he felt heat sting his cheeks. He didn't mean for her
to hear that, he didn't want to hurt her. 
         "Ma I..." he began but she silenced him with a raised hand. 
         "My Raimundo took that assignment because he felt he should do
so. It was not easy for him to leave as he did, leave behind his loved
ones, but he did so because he is a good man and a good policeman." She
stated boldly. "They replaced him with you, though I do not understand why
as you do not even look Italian, but it was done just the same and I am
grateful. You protect my son's presence, you take on his identity to keep
him from harm, with no thought to your own well being. I will not listen
to you berate yourself another moment longer. You have sacrificed just as
much as my son, you were both hurt and troubled by this change, but you
will not use my Raimundo as an excuse to keep us from caring about you, it
is too late for that. We do care for you, as you are not who you pretend
to be." Ray stared at her for a long moment, then averted his eyes. 
         "I'm sorry if I angered you." He replied softly. "I just want to
leave." 
         "Bentino asked you your Christmas wish, I want to know as well."
She remarked. "You will tell me what it is you, Stanley Kowalski wish for
this Christmas." Ray shook his head. 
         "I can't tell you that, Ma." He refused. "Please, understand I
don't want to hurt you." 
     "You will tell me, you cannot refuse a old woman." 
         "This time I must." 
     "Tell me Raymond." Ray shook his head, as he tried to reign in his
temper, he just wanted to go home for Christ's' sakes. She moved to take
him into her arms again, as was her way and was startled when he quickly
avoided her. 
         "I...I just have'ta go home now, okay?" he reasoned, offering her
an apologetic smile when he saw the hurt in her eyes from his actions. He
started to back down the steps toward his car. "I...I'm sorry fer..." He
shook his head and hurried to his car, despite Fraser's calling for him.
He slid behind the wheel just as the Mountie reached in before the door
closed and grasped his shoulder. 
         "Ray, don't..." Fraser began and watched Ray's sharp gasp of
pain. "Ray, what is it? Are you hurt?" 
         "Jesus, Fraser!" he exclaimed. "Can't ya just let me go?" Fraser
pulled the door open further and leaned down toward his partner's pale
face. 
         "What has happened, Ray?" he demanded. "Are you injured?" Ray bit
his lip and nodded, glancing back apprehensively at the Vecchio women
standing concerned in the doorway. 
         "I hurt my shoulder, Frase." Ray admitted quietly as Fraser
pulled back his jacket and moved to unbutton Ray's shirt. Ray slapped his
hand away. "I'm fine." 
         "Let me see, Ray." Fraser encouraged firmly, but Ray just pulled
his jacket closer around him. 
         "It's freezin' out here." He stated. "We'll play show and tell
later." 
         "Ray? Come inside and..." 
         "I cannot go back in there, Fraser." Ray refused. "I...Just move
and let me go home, will ya?" 
         "No I will not, Ray." Fraser declined. 
         "I swear I will kick ya in da head if ya don't." 
         "What happened to your wish for good will toward men, Ray?"
Fraser returned and the detective sighed in defeat as Francesca joined
them, her teeth chattering as she hugged herself for warmth. 
         "Come back in side, it's cold out here!" she declared to them
both. 
         "I was just leavin'." Ray insisted. "Fraser, take Frannie inside
before she catches cold." Fraser started to rise, knowing the detective
was going to be stubborn, but then Francesca leaned down to speak to him. 
         "I need you to be here, Ray." She informed quietly. "Yer the
closest thing to a brother I got right now." 
         "What about Tony?" Ray demanded peevishly. 
         "Tony isn't a brother he's a piece of the furniture." 
         "What about Fraser?" 
         "I do not think of Fraser as my brother, Ray-everyone knows
that." She stated and Fraser blushed. 
         "I ain't yer brother either, Frannie." Ray replied. 
         "No, but I want ya to be, please, please come back inside Ray."
Ray leaned his forehead against the wheel and bit his lip. The pain
killers he had taken were already starting to wear off and it was all he
could do to keep from passing out, especially since everyone seemed to be
all touchy feely with him suddenly. If he didn't leave now he wouldn't
make the drive home, if he stayed they would find out he was hurt and when
he was in pain he became a bit of an asshole. 
         "Go on inside, Francesca." Fraser suggested firmly. "I will bring
Ray along in a moment." The woman hesitated, then finally nodded and moved
away. He waited until she and the others had gone back inside then spoke
to Ray again. "Is it bad, Ray?" Ray swallowed convulsively, he couldn't
hide it now if he wanted to, and nodded, 
         "Hurts, Fraser." He admitted, finally. 
         "What happened?" 
         "Me and the Duck Boys were takin' down some bad guys, got a knife
in da shoulder, when I was strugglin' wit one of em, didn't see da one
comin' from behind." Fraser frowned and shook his head. 
         "Have you been to the hospital, Ray?" he asked, knowing full well
that his partner avoided that place like the morgue, so he wasn't
surprised when the blond shook his head. 
         "Christmas Eve, Pal, place'd be swarmin wit people worse off."
Ray reasoned, he was starting to shiver. "I..I didn't wanna miss dinner, I
promised." 
         "Didn't Leftenant Welsh tell you to go to the hospital?" 
         "Sure, and I told him I would," Agreed Ray. "Just didn't say
when." Fraser scowled and straightened. 
         "I'll drive you to the hospital, Ray." Fraser decided. "Just let
me get my coat." Ray caught his arm, despite the pain the action caused
him. 
         "Don't wanna go to the hospital, Frase." He stated. "It's just a
scratch, really. Please don't go makin' a fuss?" 
         "Ray you..." Fraser started to protest but the blond cut him off.

         "Don't....just take me home, drive me home, Frase?" he requested,
gritting his teeth to bear the pain. "Ya can take the car and come back
here after, just...don't tell Ma I'm hurt. Don't ruin it fer her, please?"
After a moment's hesitation the Mountie nodded, helped Ray move over to
the passenger side and went to retrieve his things. He didn't want to lie,
so he just told them Ray was over tired after a long day's work and just
needed to rest. He promised to return for Christmas Mass, accepted some
extra food in a Tupperware container for Ray from Ma, then headed out. 
         Ray was in terrible pain, when Fraser pulled up to his friend's
apartment building, and the Mountie was tempted to take him to the
emergency room after all, but the detective had already started to stumble
out of the car. Fraser helped him get to his apartment, then settled him
on the sofa and returned to close the door. 
         "Let me look at it, Ray." He demanded quietly as he helped his
partner off with his coat, his shirt was already darkened with the stain
of blood across his right shoulder, as he carefully pulled off Ray's tie
and unbuttoned his shirt. Ray attempted to help but was almost out of it
at this point. Fraser hid his shock as he pulled back the soaked bandage
and gauze that Ray had placed over the gaping wound. A dark slash, deep
slash marred the back of his right shoulder just below his collarbone. He
would need stitches surely, and Fraser would definitely take him to the
hospital tomorrow, but for now he would abide by Ray's wishes. 
         "See, just a scratch." Ray joked weakly as he witnessed his
partner's concern. Fraser grunted and rose to collect the first aid kit
that he knew Ray kept in his bathroom. Luckily, because Ray hated
hospitals so much, it also inclined him to have a wide assortment of
antibiotic creams, bandages and so forth, which he preferred to use
himself. Fraser was surprised to even find a suture gun in the cabinet and
he wondered where Ray had gotten in. 
         "This is going to sting, Ray." He warned as he dabbed the wound
with peroxide, watching the detective grab onto the sofa arm and grit his
teeth against the pain. Fraser quickly cleaned the wound and applied the
antibiotic cream. He indicated the instrument he had found and Ray nodded,
so he quickly stitched the wound, trying not to wince himself at Ray's
obvious agony and the slow metal sounding click if the stapler. Finally he
prepared a dressing and taped a fresh bandage to Ray's shoulder. Ray
looked like he was going to pass out at any moment, his face was pale and
gleaned with sweat and his eyes were closed wearily. Fraser retrieved a
glass of juice and helped Ray swallow the a couple of the extra strength
Tylenol he had also found in the cabinet. 
         "T...thanks Frase." Ray managed to whisper as Fraser helped him
to lay back on the sofa and pulled off his boots for him. He fetched a
blanket from Ray's bed and placed it over the trembling man. "Y..You can
go on....back now." 
         "I told the Vecchio's I would meet them for midnight mass, later,
Ray." Fraser informed as he re-packed the first aid kit, leaving it on the
table in case they should need it. "I have time to stay awhile. Where did
you get the suture stapler?" Ray smiled weakly and his eyes fluttered open

         "L..last time I was in da hospital-one a da nurses took pity on
me and told me where I could buy one." He croaked, he was still hurting
badly and it seemed to take a great deal of effort just to think straight.
"B...been doin' my own work fer awhile now." 
         "That isn't healthy, Ray." Fraser scolded as he settled into the
armchair. "You should be seen my professionals." 
         "I am a professional." Ray declared dazed and Fraser fought the
grin that threatened to form on his lips. 
         "You are a professional police officer, Ray." He reminded. "Not a
Doctor." 
         "Tomato, toh-mah-toh, Benton buddy." He sighed sleepily and
Fraser was glad it seemed the pills were finally allowing him to relax a
little. 
         "Go to sleep, Ray." He suggested quietly, but Ray shifted his
head to look at him. 
         "Sorry fer ruinin' yer Christmas, Frase." He whispered and Fraser
shook his head and moved to settle on the floor next to him so his partner
wouldn't have to crane his neck to see him. 
         "You haven't ruined anything, Ray." He assured kindly. Ray was
quiet for a long moment, his eyes, closed and Fraser thought he had
drifted off, but then those steel blue eyes opened again and he spoke once
more. 
         "You really wanna know my wish, Fraser?" he asked, his voice
slightly slurred, but his eyes were fully alert. What I really want?" 
         "Yes, Ray." Fraser accepted easily. 
         "You'll hate me." Ray sighed and Fraser shook his head. 
         "I will never hate you, Ray." 
         "I kinda wish Vecchio to never come back."  Ray stated as Fraser
swallowed his shock and remained silent. "I don't wish him dead or even
harmed, but I know when he returns to his life, his family, his sister,
his job and his friend and partner I have to leave and I...I don't want to
give any of you up. I know I have to, I know the time would come when I
accepted this assignment-I just never expected you all to be so..." He
shook his head as though trying to recapture his thoughts. "I'm sorry. I
can't help what I feel. If I don't get attached the break is easier, can't
you see? I'm a selfish bastard for wanting to keep your friend's life,
but  somethin' tells me Vecchio hasn't got a clue what all he has here,
that's just the way it is. That's why I distance myself and why I had to
leave da party. I'm sorry." Ray's voice broke and he turned away from
Fraser, hiding his face in the cushions and the Mountie felt bad for him. 
        It wasn't Ray's fault that he had come to care for all of them, it
was just the kind of man he was. Fraser had to admit he was  both anxious
and uneasy of his old partner's return, for although he missed his friend
terribly, he had formed a bond with Kowalski that even he did not quite
understand. He couldn't imagine the quirky, volatile blond not being apart
of his life and so, in a way, he understood why Ray wouldn't want the real
Vecchio to come home. He found apart of himself in Stanley Kowalski that
he hadn't known had been missing, and he suspected the detective felt the
same way about him. He reached up and gently placed a hand on Ray's good
shoulder, giving him a reassuring squeeze. 
        "No matter what happens, Ray." He began quietly. "You are my
partner and my friend and we will always have that bond shared between us.
I...I do not want to consider a future without you in it, though I would
like to have Ray Vecchio in it as well, for he is also my friend. I hope
regardless of what happens when Ray returns, that we will still
be...together." Ray turned around slowly to look at him and Fraser saw
that the detective's eyes were shining brightly with unshed tears. 
        "W...was dat hard ta say, Fraser?" he whispered and Fraser smiled,
shaking his head. 
        "Not in the least, Ray." He assured and was surprised when Ray
gently pulled him down for a brief hug. 
        "I love ya, Fraser." 
        "And I you, Ray." Fraser allowed returning the embrace, but being
careful of Ray's shoulder. 
        "I mean like a brother or somethin' not..." Ray made a gesture
with his hands and Fraser bit back his laughter. 
        "Understood, Ray." He replied straightening and tucking the
blanket more securely around his partner. "Try to sleep now." 
        "'Kay." Ray yawned and snuggled against the pillow Fraser had also
retrieved from his bed. "Merry Christmas, Fraser." 
        "Merry Christmas, Ray." Fraser returned but the blond was already
asleep. 

        Ray awoke a short time later and Fraser checked his dressing and
offered the detective some additional Tylenol, which Ray refused. 
        "Nah, I'm good." He assured the Mountie as Fraser helped him on
with a fresh shirt. Ray buttoned the front of the fleece-lined shirt,
which was more of a jacket really but was easier to get on without hurting
his shoulder, and loose enough it didn't bother the bandage. 
        "Would you like me to heat you up the plate Mrs. Vecchio sent with
us, Ray?" Fraser offered as Ray shook his head and rose from the sofa. 
        "I'm not hungry, Frase, but thanks." He glanced at his watch as he
went over to his kitchen area and pulled a soda from the fridge, offering
one to Fraser whom declined. "Ain't ya gotta be gettin' back to da
Vecchio's?" 
        "I told them I would meet them for midnight mass, Ray." Fraser
explained, joining his partner in the kitchen as Ray leaned wearily
against the counter and sipped his drink. "Would you...do you feel up to
coming? I am sure..." 
        "I don't do church, Fraser." Ray refused quickly. "But tell 'em I
said hi, and dat I was sorry I had to leave so soon." Fraser shuffled on
his feet, debating whether or not to ask his next question. 
        "You are injured, Ray..." he began. 
        "I'll be fine, Fraser." The detective blocked easily and returned
to sit on the sofa, Fraser followed and sat beside him. 
        "I promised to spend the night with the Vecchio's, so we would all
be there Christmas morning, Ray." 
        "Yah, I know, dat's cool." He glanced at Fraser. "Ya need me ta
drive ya over, my shoulder's feelin' better now I can..." 
        "No, Ray." Fraser protested, wishing he could make the detective
understand he didn't want to leave him alone. "I..I would like you to come
with me. That way I can keep an eye on your shoulder, in case you start
bleeding again and..." 
        "I can watch my own shoulder, Frase." Ray decided firmly. "I been
takin' care a myself awhile now." 
        "I'm not insinuating that you are incapable to seeing to your own
needs, Ray." Fraser advised quickly. "I simply think that with an injury
like yours it would be better if someone were around, just in case, and
since you will not go to the hospital I would like..." 
        "Fraser I'll be fine." Ray insisted finishing his soda and setting
the can on the table, beside the first aid kit. "I'm a big boy." He sighed
when Fraser gave him a scolding look, how was it the Mountie could make
him feel like he was ten years old again and messing up in front of the
principle. "Fraser, I...I really prefer to be alone, okay? I mean, I meant
what I said earlier, yer my best buddy and I care about ya but...I'm...I'm
not real good wit family gatherings." 
        "Please reconsider, Ray." Fraser requested quietly and again those
deep-searching eyes seared through Kowalski's soul so he had to look away
or be lost forever. "Ma will be very upset if I return without you and
I...I would like...I would like to.." Fraser lowered his eyes for a moment
and caressed his brow thoughtfully. "I care very much about the Vecchio
family, but...they are not really my family; I have no family left, and
yet..." He raised his gaze to meet Ray's once more. " I consider you
closer...as close as any family I might have and I...I want to spend this
time with you; whether it is with the Vecchio's or here just the two of us
in your apartment, Ray." 
        Ray stared at him for so long Fraser became more uncomfortable and
started to think he had made a tragic mistake. How could he have possibly
thought he could make the blond understand-how important this was for him?
His father was right, men don't talk about what they want or their
feelings, it leads to uncomfortable situations like this one. He opened
his mouth to apologize when Ray's words gave him pause. 
        "Okay, Fraser." Fraser glanced back at his friend, looking for a
sign of anger or edginess in the detective, but found only a warm smile.
"Help me pack some stuff an' we'll go have us a sleep over at Ma's."
Fraser beamed at him and stood eagerly. 
        "Thank you kindly, Ray." He smiled as his partner rose with him.
"Are you sure you feel up to it? We can stay here and..." 
        "Just let me throw some stuff in a bag and we're outta here,
buddy." Ray assured heading for the bedroom. Fraser watched him joyously
for a moment, unable to explain the fluttering in his heart that Ray's
words had made. He shook his head, it didn't matter why he was feeling so
strangely euphoric, all that counted was Ray would spend Christmas with
him. 

        Fraser helped Mrs. Vecchio and Francesca out of the vehicle and
aided their slow assent on the still slippery walk, to the front door,
then returned to help Maria with the slumbering children in the back. The
midnight mass had been crowded but moving and they were all tired but in
good spirits. Ray had dropped Fraser at the church and went on to the
Vecchio home, since he had a spare key and could get inside to wait. The
children had fallen asleep on the way home. Tony had retrieved the parcels
and extra gifts that the ladies had stopped to purchase earlier and left
in the car while they were at mass, while Maria and Fraser each took a
bundled child inside. 
        Ray met them at the door, accepting a kiss from Ma and a shy smile
from Francesca, as he helped them off with their coats, then turned to
give Tony a hand with the packages. They had finished placing the bags and
parcels in the living room, where the ladies would sort through later, as
Fraser and Maria came in with the kids. Francesca immediately moved to
take the girl in the Mounties's arms, but her niece, started to wake up at
the exchange and pulled closer to the man holding her. 
        "It's all right, Francesca." He assured quietly as Maria headed
upstairs. "I'll take her." Francesca nodded as Ray came out of the living
room and the girl stretched her arms toward him for a hug. 
        "Uncle Ray!" she sighed sleepily. "You came back!" Ray smiled at
her, but didn't move to embrace her, concerned she might want him to carry
her and with his shoulder he might end up dropping her. 
        "Hey, Kid." He offered dropping a kiss on her forehead. "Better
get upstairs and to sleep or The Easter Bunny won't come." She giggled. 
        "It's not Easter!" she exclaimed and Fraser smiled at his
partner's teasing. "It's Christmas!" Ray smacked his head in wonder. 
        "Dat's right! I mean da tooth fairy of course." 
        "No, silly! Santa comes on Christmas." She laughed and Ray looked
puzzled. 
        "Big guy, red suit, white beard, drive's a sleigh?" he asked her
and she nodded. "Nope, never heard of him." She laughed again and snuggled
into Fraser as Maria returned from putting her son to bed. 
        "Sleep time, Bonnie." She stated firmly, but with a small smile. 
        "Fraser'll take me." She yawned, repeating the Mounties's earlier
comment. 
        "Well, you are getting rather heavy." He remarked, as he headed
for the stairs, pretending to let her slip and she squealed and tried to
wrap her arms tighter around his neck, but he had her almost upside down
by then and she was giggling and crying out, though she knew he would
never drop her. 
        "Drop her, Fraser!" Ray teased. "See if she bounces." Bonnie
exclaimed her horror through her laughter and Fraser righted her again as
he started to climb the stairs. Francesca and Maria exchanged a knowing
glance as the girl smiled shyly and snuggled back into the Mounties's arms
and Fraser gave her a tender kiss on the forehead and cuddled her to him. 
        "He'd make a wonderful father one day." Maria sighed as Ray
glanced back at them. 
        "I know it." Francesca agreed wistfully. "I'm tryin' believe me."
Ray lowered his eyes and hid a smile, then suddenly walked over and shyly
gave each woman a kiss on the cheek. They stared at him shocked, but he
just shrugged. 
        "Merry Christmas." He murmured heading back into the living room.
Again the sisters exchanged a glance, until finally Maria commented. 
        "Maybe yer tryin' fer the wrong one, Frannie." Francesca stared
after Ray and shook her head. Maybe. 

        "Ray. Ray. Ray. Ray!" Fraser's voice finally made it through the
fog that had settled over Kowalski's brain as he noticed he and the
Mountie were the only ones in the living room. He had been watching the
women wrap presents and stuff stockings for the kids, he and Fraser had
been helping. Ray must have zoned out because now the gifts were all under
the tree and the stockings were hung by the chimney with care in
hopes...Ray shook his head. Oooh brain fart..com'ahn work with me here. He
smacked the side of his head to jostle his thought process back to reality
and ignored Fraser's sly grin. 
        "Hey, Frase." He muttered embarrassed that he hadn't noticed the
others leave. "Where'd everyone go?" 
        "I believe they've all gone to bed, Ray." The Mountie supplied.
"It's rather late, you fell asleep." Ray sat up slowly from his slumped
position in the chair, his shoulder was throbbing painfully and Fraser
noticed his wince and was beside him instantly to help his partner to his
feet. 
        "Ma already made up rooms for us to sleep." He informed gently,
waiting for the blond to get his bearings. "I'll check your shoulder
upstairs." Ray nodded and swayed a little, glad for the supportive arm
that had sneaked around his waist. 
        "Yah, 'kay. Frase." He agreed as the room finally stopped spinning
and he moved away from Fraser's steady grasp to switch off the lamp beside
them, leaving just the twinkling tree lights to illuminate the room in
patterned colors. 
        Ray sighed and stared at the tree. It was pretty, all decorated
and lit up, he couldn't remember the last time his folks had bothered to
put a tree up for Christmas, and Stella always preferred those white
Victorian looking things. This was a real tree that smelled of pine
needles, with antique and home made ornaments mixed along it's branches,
strings of pearl beads draped lovingly around it with a beautiful wide
eyed white angel on top. This was a true Christmas tree, a family's
Christmas tree. 
        He lowered his eyes away from the shining vision, just not his
family. He felt guilty to want what wasn't his, but he couldn't help it.
He loved his real folks, of course he did and he liked being there son,
but there was never the closeness with the Kowalski's that the Vecchio's
seemed too posses. Granted there was a lot more bickering and threatened
assaults in the household; they all talked entirely too much for Ray's
tastes, but it still felt more like...a home. He felt Fraser's hand on his
good shoulder. 
        "Are you all right, Ray?" he asked kindly and the detective
nodded, moving out of the room and toward the stairs. 
        "Yah, I'm good, Frase." He assured quietly, not really caring if
the Mountie believed him or not, he was suddenly very tired again. Fraser
stepped inside the room Mrs. Vecchio had made up for them; she had offered
to have the twin's move in with Francesca, so they could have a room each,
but Fraser assured her he and Ray could share a bedroom. Besides he wanted
to keep an eye on his partner anyway, just in case. 
        "I'll change your bandage, Ray." He offered as the blond settled
on the large, king-sized bed and started to toe off his boots and unbutton
his shirt. The wound had started to bleed again, despite the sutures, so
Fraser changed the dressing and added additional stitches, the loud
clipping of the stapler sounding decidedly loud in the quiet room. Ray
flinched with each one, but managed to keep quiet, not wanting to wake the
house. 
        "Frase?" he breathed hoarsely and the Mountie looked at him
concerned. "I..I think I'm gonna be sick." Fraser nodded and quickly
retrieved the nearby wastebasket, knowing his partner would not make it
down the long hall to the bathroom. Afterwards he settled Ray back against
the pillows, changed the bag in the basket with a fresh one and retrieved
a moist cloth and bowl of water from the bathroom. He even brought Ray
some mouthwash to rinse his mouth. 
        "I really think you should go to the hospital, Ray.' He admonished
as he wiped the perspiration from Ray's forehead and tsked over his
friend's sudden pallor and trembling form. "The wound may be getting
infected. I cannot..." 
        "You'll take care a me, Frase." Ray muttered weakly and closing
his eyes as Fraser moved the cool cloth over his hot face with slow gentle
strokes. "Ya always do." Fraser shook his head and moistened the cloth
again in the bowl. 

        Fraser awoke early the next morning after a restless night of
watching his partner sleep. He had fallen asleep in the armchair and now
had a crick in his neck, as he heard the children running past the room to
check the tree down stairs for a sign that Santa had come. He stretched
and moved to wake, Ray to check how the detective was feeling, then he
would probably let him sleep once he was assured of his continued health. 
         Ray didn't stir, not even when Fraser gently tried to slap him
awake. His breathing wasn't right and Fraser anxiously pulled back the
covers, to find them wet with Ray's blood that had seeped through the
bandage. Immediately Fraser reached for the phone and called an ambulance.
It would probably worry everyone downstairs, but he couldn't risk Ray's
life just to spare their feelings, not now. Francesca had decided to drive
Fraser to the hospital, following the ambulance that carried his partner
and her pretend brother. 
        "Why didn't he tell us he was hurt?" she demanded of Fraser as
they sped toward the hospital. 
        "He didn't want to spoil your Christmas celebration." Fraser
stated, his voice and face was passive as usual, but his body was rigid in
his seat, and he fidgeted with his Stetson, a sign that he was worried. 
        "Well, he'll really spoil it fer us if he dies, Fraser." She
retorted angrily then regretted her words as she saw the Mounties's lips
compress into a hard line. She reached across and gently touched his arm.
"I'm sorry, Frase. I'm worried too." 
        Fraser acknowledged her apology with a brief nod, but never took
his eyes from the ambulance in front of them. He was already lost in his
own agonizing thoughts. I should have forced him to go to the hospital, I
should have made him get the proper care. Ray can't die, he can't. He
promised to spend Christmas with me. I cannot loose another partner, not
Ray, please Dear God don't take him from me, and I love him so much. 

        Francesca paced the waiting room as they waited to hear how Ray
was doing, Fraser stood unmoving by the window and watched the falling
snow, his back to her, his posture rigid. There had been a piece of the
blade that had broken off in Ray's shoulder and his continued movement
buried it further and further into the tender tissue beneath, causing the
wound to continue bleeding, despite Fraser's attempts to stitch it. There
was no way he could have known it was there, the doctor informed Fraser,
it couldn't be seen by the naked eye and would have been hard to see even
with an x-ray, if they hadn't been looking for the direct cause of the
bleeding. 
        They had taken Ray into surgery immediately, and set up a
transfusion of blood, hoping to keep the detective from bleeding to death,
since he had already lost so much over the last twenty-four hours. Finally
the doctor joined them and said the detective would be fine, that they had
gotten to him in time. Frannie cried out in relief and Fraser asked if he
could go and see his partner, which the Doctor agreed, but only for a few
minutes. 
        Ray was laying on the stark white hospital bed, his face deathly
pale, his eyes closed, and Fraser shuddered how close he had come to
loosing his friend. He stepped up quietly to the bed, just wanting to see
for himself that Ray would be okay, but not to disturb him. The blonde's
breathing was good and according to the heart monitor on him his pulse was
strong, despite his pallor. Fraser offered up a silent prayer of thanks to
whoever might be listening and then impulsively reached to push a stray
lock of blond hair from Ray's forehead. 
        "Frase?' the cop asked his eyes opening just as Fraser snatched
his hand back discreetly. 
        "I'm here, Ray." He assured quietly and Ray offered him a weak
smile. 
        "Hey, Buddy." Fraser offered him a polite nod. "Sorry ta ruin yer
holiday." 
        "Don't start on that, Ray." Fraser warned, trying to hide his
rising anger that had given to fear. "I've already decided I should have
never listened to you. I should have taken you to the hospital and never
mind about your protests. You could have died Ray and then..." Fraser was
babbling and Ray raised his hand to catch hold of the Mounties's fingers. 
        "I'm sorry fer scarin' ya Fraser." He offered gently and Fraser's
anger dissipated almost immediately, as the detective gave him a
reassuring squeeze. 
        "I...I've come to realize that, perhaps you have started to
influence me more than I thought, Ray." He commented and Ray gave him a
puzzled look as he released his hand. 
        "Yah? How?" Fraser blushed a little and took a sudden interest in
the sheets of Ray's bed. 
        "I...ah...I kept thinking that if you didn't make it out of this
alive I was going to have to kill you, Ray." Fraser admitted straight
faced and Ray laughed, then groaned as the movement caused his pain, but
his smile never disappeared. 
        "Dere's hope fer ya yet then, Benton buddy." He chuckled and
Fraser brightened. 
        "You think?" Ray shook his head, still smiling. 
        "Yah, I think. Ya, freak." Fraser returned his smile and their
palms met once more. "Love ya, Fraser." 
        "And I you, Ray." Fraser vowed gently. 

         Despite doctor's orders Ray left the hospital that afternoon,
they had gotten the piece of metal out of his shoulder and patched him up,
so he wanted to get the hell out. He argued with the doctors for twenty
minutes and with Fraser and Francesca for another ten, then knowing the
detective would try and go home himself they agreed to take him out of the
hospital. Francesca's stipulation was he had to stay at the Vecchio
household over night again and Ray countered with staying for dinner and
suggested Fraser could stay with him at his place so he wouldn't be
unattended since everyone felt like hovering. Francesca and Fraser
agreed.  His arm was in a sling and the prescription they had given him
lessened the pain in his arm to a dull ache, so he was in a better mood by
the time they arrived. Mrs. Vecchio ran out and, restraining herself from
throwing her arms around him and aggravating his injury, she grabbed his
free hand firmly. 
        "I should be furious with you!" she exclaimed and went of on a
string of Italian that Ray couldn't keep up with or hope to understand,
but he sensed her disapproval. 
         "Ma!" Francesca interrupted. "Yell at him later, let's go
inside." Her mother nodded, but kept a firm grasp on Ray's hand and tugged
him along behind her toward the house, even as he gave Fraser a pleading
look. The Mountie turned his eyes away and followed them inside, whatever
Ray got from Mrs. Vecchio, he deserved for making them all worry so. He
was actually amazed that, as Ma continued her tirade the moment they were
in the warmth of the front hall, Ray never once raised his voice to her or
did anything but apologize quietly. Any one else that ever got in the
detective's face like that would normally result in the blond threatening
first and then acting on that threat. 
         "Ma." Fraser said gently, finally interceding on his partner's
behalf, he'd suffered enough. "Ray did not mean to cause you distress, he
was trying to protect you from having to worry during Christmas." The
woman gazed at him expectantly. "I am sure that he knows better now and he
is here, so perhaps we should all just try and enjoy the rest of the day."
Mrs. Vecchio considered his words silently for a moment, then turned her
attention back to Ray. 
         "I really am so sorry." He offered once more and Mrs. Vecchio
took his face in her hands and kissed him gently on each cheek. 
         "I forgive you my darling." She confessed finally and Fraser
watched Ray's shoulder's sag with relief. "Do not hurt me so again, no?" 
         "No." he agreed. "Never, Ma. I am sorry." She nodded and moved
away offering him a small smile. 
         "It is forgotten then." She headed toward the living room. "Come,
we have waited enough for the gifts, we will enjoy Christmas and then we
will eat." She disappeared around the corner and Ray glared at Fraser, who
helped him shrug out of his jacket, which he only had draped over his
shoulders because of his sling. 
         "Took ya long enough ta help, dere, Fraser." He muttered and
Fraser hid a smile. 
         "You deserved it, Ray." Fraser replied and Ray glanced at him
surprised. 
         "That isn't very Mountie-like." He stated. "Dat's bordering on
rude." 
         "But it is accurate, Ray." Fraser continued and with a firm hand
on his back guided the detective into the family room. "Shall we?" Ray
took the recliner Tony surprisingly offered him and Fraser settled beside
him on the floor, as Maria and Francesca passed the gifts out. Maria and
Tony had opened theirs with the kids earlier who were busy upstairs
playing with their new treasures. Tony made a comment about watching
something on television and went on up as well, leaving the five adults. 
         "These are yer's Frase." Francesca offered the small pile to the
Mountie who set them beside him. 
         "Thank you kindly, Francesca." He returned as Marie settled Ma's 
gifts by the sofa and Frannie's pile by the tree, where her sister always
curled up to open them. 
         "Here ya are, Ray." Francesca informed handing the remaining
gifts to the detective whom was pretending to be her brother. 
         "Um..thank's Frannie." He replied slightly uncomfortable that
they had gotten him anything. Well, of course they did, they had to keep
up appearances, right this was all for Vecchio, he just had to keep
repeating that to himself. Everyone settled in and started to unwrap their
gifts, except Ray, who was enjoying himself watching everyone else's
excitement over what they had received. 
         "Oh Ray!" Francesca exclaimed as she opened the box that held her
tennis bracelet. "It's beautiful! I wanted just this one!" She rushed over
to give him a kiss, but he stopped her with a warning hand. 
         "A thank you'd work, fine, Frannie." He teased and she paused for
a moment, considering his words, then ignored them and dropped almost in
his lap, careful of his shoulder, to give him a big hug and a dozen kisses
over his face, narrowly missing  a grinning Fraser who moved to get out of
her way. 
         "Thank you thank you thank you!!!" she inflected each word with a
kiss and Ray was giggling and squirming under her. 
         "Get offa me!" he protested. "Fraser, help!" Francesca laughed
and hopped up with a final ruffle of his hair, then allowed Maria and her
mother to view the bracelet admiringly. Ray tried to straighten his
clothes and his hair with his good hand as Fraser resumed his position
beside him. Ray kicked him gently. "Some buddy you are." 
         "Oh, were you needing assistance Ray?" he inquired innocently and
Ray had to struggle not to pop him. "Aren't you going to open your gifts
Ray?" he asked handing him one of the parcels. Ray reluctantly took it. 
         "Sure." 

        Fraser leaned back in the easy chair and glanced at the dozing
detective on the sofa. Everyone had liked their gifts even Ray, who
thanked Ma for the new razor, Maria and Tony for the years subscription to
one of his favorite magazines and laughed at Frannie's gift-a book on how
to pick up women. She included a box of his favorite chocolates and a new
coffee mug for his real gift. Fraser glanced back at the television screen
which was playing It's a Wonderful Life, then once again at his partner.
He picked up the remote and switched the Television off, meaning to wake
Ray so they could go to bed, but the detective mustn't have been asleep
because his eyes opened instantly. 
        "What'd ya do dat for?' he asked Fraser surprised. "I was watchin'
it." 
        "I thought you were asleep Ray." The Mountie informed. "How can
you watch the program with your eyes closed?" 
        "I just can." Ray insisted. "It's one of dem things American's can
do." Fraser chuckled. 
        "Would you like me to turn it back on?" he offered as Ray slowly
sat up and yawned, proving he was at least tired, if not sleeping. 
        "Nah, I've seen it a hundred times." He said rolling his head
around on his shoulders to get the circulation going again. Fraser nodded
then pulled something from his pocket and handed it to the detective.
"What's dis?" 
        "You're Christmas gift, Ray." He stated as his partner accepted
the small wrapped item. 
        "Oh." He replied, he'd forgotten that he hadn't opened a gift from
Fraser yet. "Thanks buddy." He carefully pulled off the red twine and
unfolded the soft green cloth.  It was a hand-sewn badge with a small
stitched figure of a man, bent over with a lightening bolt-symbolizing
pain, coming from his back. The badge was made of soft blue cloth and
black leather and had Ray's name in bold letters on top, then different
symbols aligned the sides. A small scroll of lettering adorned the  mall
certificate attached to it. 'Presented for beating the odds, facing
incredible danger and sleeping on a hard floor without concern for his own
physical well being Duly noted by: Constable B. Fraser.' Ray laughed in
delight and ran his fingers lightly over the precious gift. 
        "Dis is great, buddy." He smiled. "Ya remembered." Fraser smiled. 
        "I did promise to get you a badge for agreeing to sleep on the
floor, Ray." Fraser reminded then handed him another gift, larger than the
first. 
        "Two?" Ray asked surprised as he carefully placed his new badge
back inside the wrapping and pulled the string off the second gift. It was
a sleek silver pen with Ray's initials on it, his real initials and Ray
immediately plucked it from the box and examined it. 
        "Do you like it, Ray?" Fraser asked anxiously and Ray nodded. 
         "I love it, Frase." He assured placing the pen back in it's box
to keep it from getting lost until he got it back to his place. "It's
great. Thank you." 
         "I know you cannot carry it with you while working as Ray
Vecchio-but I thought you could use it after...well when Ray returns."
Fraser stated as Ray collected his gifts in one hand and rose to place
them under his small tree. 
         "I appreciate it Frase." He replied as he turned toward the
window and stared out at the falling snow. "Do ya miss Canada very much,
Fraser? The Mountie was startled by the question but answered
automatically. 
         "Very much, Ray." Ray nodded and pulled his window open, letting
a brisk cold wind sweep the room as he held his good hand out to catch the
snow. 
         "It's yer home." Ray commented, though Fraser was uncertain if he
was talking directly to him or merely voicing his thoughts aloud as he had
a tendency to do. "I get dat, it's a shame ya have ta be away from it,
especially on Christmas." The detective played with the flakes for a
moment before continuing. "Christmas is about family, an' ya got none.
Christmas is about home, an' yer stuck here. " Fraser regarded him
curiously, wondering if the two glasses of wine Ray had at dinner were
affecting him slightly, along with the pills the doctors gave him, it
could be an explosive combination. 
         "It isn't as bad as all that, Ray." He insisted off hand. "I
enjoy my work here and I am making a difference here. I have friends that
are as close as family so I am not as lonely perhaps as I would be in
Canada." 
         "I'm set fer bed, Frase." Ray sighed suddenly, closing the window
and dropping the subject. "See ya in da morning, buddy." 
         "Good night. Ray." Fraser offered gently. "Sleep well." Ray
nodded and went into his room and closed the door. 
  

         Fraser was too far ahead of him, damn but that man could run fast
when he needed to, so Ray scouted for a short cut that would take him into
the fleeing suspect's path. He knew this city like the back of his hand,
and sure enough he found the route he needed and caught him self on the
corner of the building, as he rounded the corner and jumped the fence he
knew would be there. Further down the alley, over another fence, knocking
down a few crates that were behind it and straight through the park. 
        He could now see one of the suspects, who was still looking behind
for the pursuing Mountie and perhaps his partner in crime, so he was not
expecting the detective that blind sided him as he turned back. They
tumbled to the ground, unfortunately at a sharp incline of the park's
grassland, and went rolling down the hill together. Ray was the first to
recover, quickly straddled the criminal, as he still lay on his stomach,
and he cuffed him. 
        "Gee, dat was fun, wanna go again?" he sneered at the man amused,
even though he had managed to land on his bad shoulder when they hit and
it was throbbing incessantly. Maybe Fraser and Welsh were right and he
should have waited before going back in the street, giving the shoulder a
little more time to heal, but Ray had wanted back in the action again. "Ya
have da right ta keep yer trap shut." He began of the individual's rights,
as always he said them with his own flair. He was just finishing as Fraser
walked up with his own suspect, hauled by the collar almost. 
        "Well done, Ray" Fraser congratulated pleased as their back up
finally arrived. Ray offered him a small grin, trying not to think about
how much his shoulder hurt. If the Mountie had waited for Ray, who would
have waited for back up, he probably wouldn't have had to perform the
stunts he did, but then that niggling voice inside his head that sounded
suspiciously like Fraser's claimed they would also have lost the suspects.

        "You too, Buddy." He offered instead as he rose and the uniformed
officers took their suspects into custody. Fraser noticed the cautious way
his partner straightened and frowned. 
        "Are you injured, Ray?" he asked concerned and Ray shook his head.

        "Just landed on my shoulder, Frase." He admitted rubbing the
injured area carefully. "It'll be okay." Fraser decided not to pursue it
for the moment, as they walked slowly back the long distance where Ray had
haphazardly parked the GTO when Fraser had seen the muggers and jumped out
of the car. 
        "I would be happy to help you with the reports, Ray." The Mountie
offered as they crossed the street toward the car. "Oh, my hat!" He
reached up and found his hat had been knocked from his head in the run as
Ray opened his car door. "I'll be right with you, Ray." Fraser started
back across the street just as a black Lincoln ran the red light in the
intersection behind them and sped toward the Mountie. 
        "Fraser!" Ray screamed as he started after his friend to warm him,
then watched in slow horror as Fraser turned just as the car hit him,
propelling the Canadian up over the top, smashing the windshield and then
tossing him back off the right side of the vehicle.  Someone screamed, and
Ray realized it was him as he ran to his fallen partner's side and whipped
his phone out in the same movement. The car had long since disappeared
down the street and a crowd started to gather around them, as Ray dialed
911 and demanded an ambulance to their location. He knew better then to
move the Mountie, so he tried to console himself with trying to get him
awake. 
        "Fraser? Buddy?" he questioned softly caressing the man's cheek,
then gently slapping him. "Wake up Fraser. Are you okay? Answer me,
buddy." Fraser didn't move and though Ray felt a pulse it was thready at
best and there was blood coming from the corer of Fraser's mouth and from
his forehead. "Yer gonna be okay, Fraser, you will. You have to be." 

        At the hospital Ray was informed that Fraser had three broken
ribs, a fractured pelvic bone and a possible concussion. It was the
concussion they were worried about, because until the Mountie woke they
couldn't be sure of any other damage. Ray thanked them for their prognoses
then called Turnbull to see if he could mind Diefenbaker for awhile, since
the wolf was at the consulate and not with them that day. Turnbull agreed
readily and inquired of Constable Fraser's condition, which Ray told him
what he knew. 
Thatcher and Welsh showed up almost at the same time, with Francesca
arriving just a few minutes after. Everyone was demanding to know what had
happened and Ray told them what he could.  His concern over his partner's
health however, made his temper short and after ten minutes of questions
he told them all to ask the doctor for anything else, he was going to
check on his friend. 
        He had already gotten permission from the doctor to stay with
Fraser until he woke and the slow steady beep beep of the heart monitor
only added to the detective's anxiety. He couldn't believe it, it all
happened so fast, he'd had no time to warn Fraser, no time to act, but
that didn't change the fact that he failed his partner. Fraser was hurt,
badly and Ray believed it was his fault. He settled into a chair beside
the bed and watched his friend quietly, willing him to wake up soon. 
Ray awoke to a sense of foreboding, something was wrong and he knew it the
instant he turned to find Fraser's bed empty/ He bolted from the chair and
twirled around just in time to see the Mountie step out onto the ledge of
the building. 
        "Fraser!" he exclaimed rushing over and imploring his friend, who
seemed to be in a dazed state. "Get in here!" He was ignored and Ray
started to climb out onto the ledge to get him, just as Fraser stepped
off. The detective's arms shot out automatically and he caught Fraser's
hand and wrist, grimacing in pain as his other hand clung to the window
frame to brace them. He had one foot outside on the ledge and the other on
the floor inside the window, giving him a more precarious position. His
shoulder was on fire and tears sprang to his eyes as he tried to get some
leverage to haul the semi-conscious Mountie back through the window. He
couldn't release either of his holds to angle for a better angle or they'd
both fall. He started screaming for help, but his voice was hoarse from
his own pain. 
        "Oh God!" he croaked. "Please...don't let me drop him!" He'd never
forgive himself if he let Fraser fall, the Canadian would never survive
the drop from twelve stories up. "Fraser. F..Fraser buddy, please snap out
of it." He gritted his teeth and felt his grip loosening. Where the hell
were all the nurses that were flapping around earlier for Christ's sake? 
         Fraser was almost a dead weight and wasn't returning Ray's grasp
on his wrist, even as Ray felt himself being pulled further out the
window. He couldn't pull up, all his effort was in maintaining the
cautious grip he had on his friend, and he couldn't adjust his position in
the window without trying to pull up. All he could do was pray someone one
would come in before they both fell to the pavement below. He could of
course release Fraser and save himself, but that was not an option for
Ray, they were partners and it was up to him to watch Fraser's back and
keep him safe, regardless of his own safety. 
        "I'm sorry, God!" Ray moaned as he started to slip even further
out the window, now only his grip on the frame was keeping him balanced,
his foot no longer could reach the inside floor because of the way he was
positioned. "I never meant all dat about Vecchio-I never mean any harm.
Please help me keep Fraser safe-I'll do anything God, just give me the
strength not to drop him." Suddenly he noticed a woman sitting on the
ledge next to him and he almost lost his grip on the window in shock. She
wore a plain white dress, her bare feet swinging idly from her perch, long
auburn hair and a beautiful kind face. She was glowing and Ray was
starting to think he was loosing his mind. 
        "Hullo, Ray." She greeted in a sweet brogue. 
        "W..who...how...?" he stammered and she smiled softly. 
        "I'm an angel, Ray, sent by God, with a message for you." Ray
stared at her dumbfounded. 
        "I don't need a message I need help!" he exclaimed angrily as he
slipped further and he groaned in pain.    "Gimmie a hand if yer just
gonna sit dere." She smiled then suddenly disappeared. "Great! I am
loosing my..." 
        He was startled as he felt warm arms coming around him from inside
and pulling him backwards through the window. He didn't question it, just
was glad for the assistance as he managed to get both feet inside, but
still couldn't pull Fraser through with his bad shoulder. He felt a hand
on his shoulder and for a moment the pain was gone and replaced with a
prickling sensation of strength that finally enabled him to pull his
partner back inside. They fell backwards onto the floor of the hospital,
Fraser's weight requiring extra effort just to get them upright again. 
        Fraser was still unconscious as Ray maneuvered him to the bed just
as a nurse finally came in and stared in surprise, demanding to know what
had happened. Ray told her and she ran to get the doctor as he settled
Fraser in the bed. The doctor rushed in and immediately took over,
requesting that the detective wait out side. Ray's shoulder was starting
to hurt again, so he agreed and let them do what they needed to with
Fraser as he went t the nurse's station and requested some aspirin or
something for the pain. 
         Moments later he returned to Fraser's room, after listening to
the doctor say that the Mountie was still in a coma, though how he had
managed to get onto the ledge was beyond them-it was some sort of sleep
walking they had never heard of. Leave it to Fraser to be different. Ray
settled next to the bed again and watched his friend sleep. He enfolded
his long fingers between Fraser's and settled them back on the crisp white
sheets of the hospital bed. 
        "How is he?" a familiar voice asked and Ray looked up to see the
woman from the ledge standing on the other side of the bed. 
        "I...they don't know yet." He murmured. "Who are you?" 
        "I am an angel." She informed as a soft unexplainable glow
surrounded her and made Ray blink at the brightness suddenly permeating
the small room. 
        "A..an angel?" he questioned doubtful, but his emotional and
physical state at the moment was not at it's best, so the idea that he was
loosing his mind easily coerced him to go with the flow. "What's yer
name?" 
        "Monica." She allowed sweetly. 
        "Why ya here, Monica?" he demanded his grip on Fraser's hand
tightening. "Ya can't have him, y'know-I'll fight ya fer him and..." 
        "I am not here to take Benton, Ray." She assured. "That is not my
purpose here." 
        "T...then why are ya here?" 
        "I've come to deliver a message to you from God." She stated
kindly and his eyes widened. 
        "God wants ta give me a message?" he asked suspicious. "Just like
dat he decided ta drop me a line, hey?" She smiled. 
        "Something like that, yes." She agreed. 
        "Is...is it about da wish...my Christmas wish?" he asked. "I..I
changed it-I don't...I want Vecchio ta be okay and..." 
        "No, Ray it isn't about your wish, and anyway, God knows that
wasn't your real wish." 
        "It wasn't?" 
        "No, that was simply something you told Benton to keep him at a
distance, but it didn't work did it?" Ray stared at her shocked, then
lowered his eyes and shook his head. 
        "No, it didn't work." He admitted, so quietly she had to strain to
hear him. "I'm glad it didn't." He raised his eyes to his partner's face.
"I don't know what I'd do without him." 
        "God loves you, Ray." She explained softly. "That was the message
I have for you. He loves you and you are not alone, even without Benton,
you are not alone. You do make a difference here, Ray-a great difference.
Never doubt that." Ray rose his eyes to hers and blinked back the tears
that had risen to the surface. 
        "Why are you telling me this?" he whispered tormented and she
lowered her hand to grasp Fraser's free palm. 
        "Don't think you can't go on without him, Ray." She sighed. "It
isn't true. You can go on, you must go on." 
        "Y..you are here to take him." Ray croaked as a tear slid down his
cheek. "Please, don't take him away. "I...I need him. Frannie needs him,
so many people need him here. It's my fault he's here-I didn't protect
him, I didn't..." Monica moved around and placed an arm around his
trembling shoulders. 
        "It was not your fault." She assured. "Remember that it was never
your fault, Ray. God loves you and..." 
        "I don't love Him!" Ray exclaimed angrily. "Not if He takes Fraser
away, not if He lets him die!" 
        "You don't mean that, do you, Ray?" she inquired gently and Ray
shook his head. 
        "No, no, please I do love Him, I love them both..." he murmured
laying his head on their joined hands, his tears flowing freely. "I love
them both...love him..." 
        "Ray?" a deep voice whispered and the detective raised his head to
stare at into the beautiful blue eyes of his partner. 
        "Frase!" he croaked joyfully as he rose to give his partner a
quick hug. "Yer back, buddy-yer back." 
        "Had I gone somewhere, Ray?' the Mountie inquired quietly, his
eyes were watching Ray carefully. 
        "Let me go get the Doc." Ray offered starting to release Fraser's
hand as he started away, but Fraser tightened his grip. 
        "Ray-who were you talking to?" he asked curious and Ray just
grinned and shook his head. 
        "It doesn't matter." He rebuffed, noticing that there was no sign
of Monica. "Yer awake and..." 
        "Who do you love, Ray?" Fraser insisted. "You were saying..." 
        "I love you buddy." Ray answered easily. "Told ya dat, remember?"
Ray finally moved away and went to find the doctor as Fraser regarded him
thoughtfully. 

        Ray settled Fraser on his bed and fussed over him, checking to see
if he was comfortable, if he wanted tea or something to eat. Finally
Fraser's patience reached an end. 
        "Ray, please!" he exclaimed. "I am fine, stop hovering." Ray
grinned and dropped into the chair next to the bed, automatically reaching
to pet Diefenbaker as the animal settled at his feet. 
        "Just want to make sure yer comfy Frase." He commented innocently,
but the Mountie saw the mischief in his partner's eyes. "After all, you do
the same for me, right?" 
        "Ah." Fraser remarked knowingly. Ray was getting back for all
Fraser's fuss over his shoulder. "That was different, Ray. You were
injured quite badly and..." 
        "An' you were in da hospital." Ray countered still grinning. "So
shut up and take it like a good Mountie." Fraser sighed, realizing there
was no way he could win the argument and settled back into the cushions, a
part of him glad for the attention for it wasn't often he was pampered,
although he did feel guilty about taking up his partner's bed. 
         It was New Year's Eve and he had expected his partner to have
plans for the evening, but Ray seemed content to stay at home and attended
to him. He was actually feeling fine, just a little sore, from his injured
ribs, but Ray insisted he rest. He still couldn't believe it when Ray had
told him he had somehow climbed out onto the ledge at the hospital and Ray
had to pull him back in. He didn't doubt the detective's strength, but it
would have been a difficult maneuver even for Fraser himself to lift
someone at almost dead weight with hardly any leverage and a bad shoulder.

        "Are you sure you don't want to go out and celebrate, Ray?" he
asked again, regretful that his energetic friend would miss the parties.
"I really don't mind and..." 
        "We're gonna have us a party right here, Frase." Ray assured
calmly and Fraser raised an eyebrow. What was he planning? With Kowalski
it was impossible to tell, which only made the Canadian more curious.
"Speakin' of which, I'm gonna let you rest and I have some stuff ta do." 
        "Can I help, Ray?" Fraser offered automatically and Ray shook his
head. 
        "Nope, you stay right here." He patted the bed and Diefenbaker
climbed up next to Fraser. "Keep  him here Dief." Fraser sighed and
watched his friend leave the bedroom, closing the door behind him
securely, and reached for the tea Ray had brought him as Dief whined at
him. 
        "I expect he doesn't want you underfoot." Fraser responded calmly
and the wolf made another noise at him. "How can you be hungry you just
ate not twenty minutes ago?" A woof and a whine as Diefenbaker rested his
head between his paws and stared up at Fraser forlornly. "No, I am
certainly not going to order you a pizza, you're a wolf for God's sake-you
have been terribly spoiled by Ray's generosity." Diefenbaker huffed and
turned his eyes away. "Well, there you are then." 
        Fraser settled back again and thought back over the past week.
Christmas at the Vecchio's was eventful to say the least, especially with
the entire trauma-surrounding ray, but shortly after they fell back into
their regular schedule of working cases and catching criminals. Ray's
Doctor had given him the okay to return to duty, though Fraser suspected
it was more due to the detective's pestering then whether or not his
shoulder was better. 
        Francesca had to show everyone her new bracelet, which she was
wearing every day now and Welsh and the duck boys both seemed to enjoy the
gifts both he and Ray had given them for Christmas. Fraser had noticed the
small gold locket that adorned Assistant State's Attorney Stella Kowalski,
one afternoon upon meeting her at the station. It looked vaguely familiar
and he inquired politely about it. 
She had smiled, her fingers automatically rising to touch the charm and
explained that it had been left at her desk at work but that she didn't
know who had given it to her. Fraser believed she suspected whom it really
was from, by the way she seemed to caress the locket, as she directed a
shy glance at Ray, who was playfully arguing over something with Francesca
at her desk. He had been tempted to ask to see the pictures inside, but
again he suspected whom they would be of. 
         Then came his accident and time spent in the hospital and now he
was the injured party instead of Ray. His partner seemed, different
somehow, his usual boundless energy seemed to have tripled while Fraser
was unconscious and Fraser was finding he became tired just watching the
blond sometimes. The Kowalski's had dropped by yesterday, when Fraser and
ray first arrived from the hospital, Barbara Kowalski had made sure they
had plenty of food and necessities to get them through the week. 
         Fraser learned from a discreet conversation he over heard between
Ray and his Father that Ray had actually paid for their cruise and
insisted his Father use it as a Christmas gift to his mother, meanwhile
Ray gave her the bread maker to cover his tracks. He was learning a lot
about his new partner, what a generous person Ray was, but shy about
admitting to that generosity. Ray liked to come across brash, tough and
devil may-care, but Fraser had already started to see through him. Ray's
kind heart was apparent to any who took the time to look, just like when
the detective took the time to talk with that young boy in the mall awhile
back. 
        He heard different noises from the front room, though he couldn't
tell what they were and he wondered what Ray was up too. The music was on,
as usual, drowning out some of the noise, but it was still enough that
Fraser was curious. His intrigue got the better of him and he started to
rise from the bed, only to have Diefenbaker climb across his legs and hold
him in place effectively. 
        "What do you think you are doing?" he demanded surprised. "I am
sure Ray didn't mean to literally keep me here, Diefenbaker." A whine was
all the wolf would respond as he refused to move and with Fraser's ribs he
didn't want to try and lift him. "You're supposed to be my wolf,
Diefenbaker, why are you listening to him?" A woof. "Oh, he promised you
something, didn't he? What a doughnut? A candy bar? What?" The wolf was
silent. "Traitor. Show some loyalty and get off of me." Diefenbaker still
refused to move. "I am the one who walks and feeds you, may I remind you
and I can still mail you back to Canada, where there are no free meals and
jelly doughnuts. The wolf moved and Fraser rose with a curt nod. He didn't
get to the door before it opened and Ray stood there grinning. 
        "Where ya goin'?" he asked leaning against the doorframe, blocking
Fraser's voice of the living room. 
        "I heard noise." Fraser replied easily. "I was going to offer
assistance." 
        "None needed." Ray supplied taking Fraser's arm. "Close yer eyes."

        "Why?" 
        "Just do it." Ray commanded. "And no peeking." Fraser sighed and
complied, allowing Ray to guide him into the living room and settle him,
what seemed like the floor, though it was cushioned, the air around them
was chilled, but felt comfortable to Fraser. "Keep 'em closed." Ray warned
as he moved away then came back a few minutes later and settled beside him
and gently pushed Fraser to lay on his back. "Okay, you can open then
now." Fraser opened his eyes and gasped. 
        White, sheets surrounded them perhaps from Ray's bed that he had
arranged in a large tent on all three sides of where they lay, and above
was a star lit sky that could match the deepest northern night. Ray had
pasted what Fraser assumed were  luminescent stars all over his ceiling,
in a background of the deepest midnight blue. A forest of pine trees and
snow adorned the wall, projected from somewhere behind them, though they
looked real enough for Fraser that it took his breath away. 
         All the other lights in the apartment were off except for
whatever Ray was using to make the ceiling glow. Sounds of the northern
forests seemed to be playing in the back ground and it felt so much like
home that Fraser felt hot tears spring to his eyes. The stars blocked out
all signs of Ray's apartment and the sheets that represented snow and the
open windows created a wonderful arctic air around them. Ray had pulled on
his jacket and was laying with his arms rested behind his head, watching
Fraser carefully, Diefenbaker was curled up between them. 
        "Oh, Ray." Was all the Mountie could say as he carefully sat up
and took it all in, all Ray's hard work to help him feel like he was back
home in Canada, all the attention to detail that Ray deliberated over and
the extra touches that made it special. 
        "I know it ain't really yer home, Frase." Ray offered kindly,
still regarding him thoughtfully. "But I figure a little imagination can't
hurt and it might help ya miss it a little less, y'know?" He pushed a
small basket toward Fraser and grinned. "Check dat out." Fraser raised an
eyebrow and opened the basket, staring at the contents in surprise. Deer
Pemmican, or jerky as they called it in the states, shipped from Canada. A
bag of hard tac, bark tea and a few other assorted delicacies that Fraser
had commented on at one time or another. Ray had managed to ship many of
his favored treats from his homeland and the cost must have been dear for
such an exchange. 
        "Ray I..." Fraser's words were stuck in his throat. He didn't know
what to say, how to express his gratitude to his partner. 
        "Just don't ask me ta eat very much of it wit ya." Ray joked and
Fraser smiled kindly. 
        "Thank you, Ray." He managed. "For everything." Ray shrugged and
rolled into a sitting position. 
        "I...I hope dat when you do, y'know..get ta go home." Ray paused
as though searching for the proper words.       "When...when Vecchio comes
back and if you...decide to go home dat you...well, keep in touch." 
        "Always, Ray." Fraser assured confidently. "I could never allow
our friendship to become a...passing thing. I hope we are together for
many years to come, Ray." He smiled again. "Perhaps you could come to
Canada with me if I go, Ray?" Ray shivered and Fraser tried not to laugh. 
        "You kiddin'? I ain't into frostbite and phenomena, Fraser." He
joked and Fraser did laugh then as both men lay back and enjoyed their
evening under thet stars. 

The End 
  

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