Helping Hand Helping Hand by avg_62 Author's disclaimer: The usual disclaimers apply Author's notes: Not beta´d. Ray´s POV on Exposure. Pairing: Fraser/Kowalski Rating: NC-17 A Helping Hand I suck at dreaming. I know that because I almost always have the same dreams. Either I'm reliving the day's events (after really tough days) or I'm having nightmares about Fraser leaving me. I guess I'm insecure. I don't need a shrink to tell me that. Tonight though, I must be feeling okay, because I'm dreaming about the rough day I've had. Could have been worse though... The morning started out with a crime scene that included your standard alley complete with full trash bin. As usual, I pull short straw and get to go dumpster-diving. I did my best to get out of it though. "There's nothing in there, I can see that from here," I said. "Why would a burglar run all the way back down this alley to throw something in the trash. It doesn't make any sense." I think I was whining a bit at this point. "Many criminals assume no one will look in a dumpster, Ray." "That's because no one in his right mind would climb into a dumpster, Fraser." "But we may find a valuable lead there, Ray." "Oh, crap...okay...but I want a shower at lunch time." "Fair enough, Ray," Fraser smiled, "I'll give you a boost." Frase put his hands together to make a step for me and I put my foot on it and grabbed his shoulders. "On three, okay?" I said. "One, two, three... FRAAAAAAAZE, oompf." I landed in God knows what after Fraser flung me over his shoulder into the dumpster. I jumped up in time to see him wipe a smirk off his face. "A bit too enthusiastic on the boost there, Frase," I grumbled. "I'm sorry Ray, you are lighter than you look." Fraser said, but I could see he was struggling to keep a straight face. "Yeah, right," I answered, "I don't think I could be any lighter than I look Fraser. You're just pissed because I gave Dief a doughnut this morning." Uh-oh, the look on his face told me I had just screwed up again. "You gave Dief another doughnut today, Ray?" he practically yelled at me. "After I specifically warned you not to do that after yesterday's doughnut?" Fraser's lips disappeared as his mouth tightened into a grim line. Aw shit, I'm in trouble again and not the fun kind. "Oh great," I groan, "that means I'm in for another attack of your 'I was just being helpful Ray' revenge, huh?" "I'm sure I don't know what you mean," replied Fraser, switching to his most innocent Mountie look. "Yeah sure you don't." I finally took a look in the dumpster. "Geez, Frase, what do you suppose that was?" "Well, it would appear to be the rotting remains of..." Fraser began. I stopped him there. "Ah, never mind, Frase, that was a retinal question." "You mean 'rhetorical,' Ray?" "That's what I said." "So you did." And so the day continued. I changed my clothes and took a long, hot shower at noon while Fraser made lunch. I tried to talk him into a shower too, but he was still sulking about the doughnut thing. I began to wonder when the next blow would fall. Fraser may look all prim and proper, but he can sulk with the best of them and hold a grudge to boot. I sometimes forget things, but he doesn't, especially when he wants payback. Sometimes it's fun, but I don't think the next time will be. The afternoon was going pretty well, we hadn't been shot at, beaten up or forced to do paperwork so I was feeling up. The clock said 4 p.m. and I realized we only an hour to go before weekend. We both had two days off and no specific plans...everything looked good. I shoulda known better. At 4:15 p.m. Huey and Dewey brought in a wino-witness just as I was walking to the breakroom for my last work coffee of the day. As I passed them, the wino decided to throw up on me. There's something about seeing other people vomit that makes my own body feel left out and want to join in the fun. I managed to make it to the men's room before I tossed my cookies too. I could feel Fraser holding my head (by the hair, still sulking apparently) and rubbing my back while I heaved a few more times just to make sure I chucked it all. Eventually the heaves left and I tried to straighten up. I really needed to get my jeans and shirt off. The wino had good range and had covered most of both. "Fraser...you can let go of my hair now." "Oh, of course. I'm sorry Ray. Are you feeling better?" "Yeah, I'm all right. I just have a low puke threshold. Always had a hair- trigger gag reflex." "Ahh." "Ahh, what, Fraser?" "Ahh, no wonder you hate to search dumpsters." "That's one of many reasons." I toed my shoes off and carefully opened my jeans. "Eeuuw, yuck!" I managed to pull them and my shirt off without heaving again. I tossed my clothes in the garbage, just waiting for Fraser's reaction. "Ray, there are some good stain removers on the market that could clean your jeans and shirt admirably," Fraser complained on cue. "No way. I could never look at those jeans again. Besides they were getting pretty old." "Ray, I would be happy to..." "No Frase, they're gone, dead, say bye-bye and go get me some sweats and a t-shirt from my locker, OK?" "Okay Ray, I'll be back shortly." After that, I figure Fraser and me (mostly me) had done enough in the line of duty and we headed for home. Dief wouldn't even sit behind me in the car. He crowded as far as he could to the other side of the goat, whining the whole ride home. I couldn't blame him. When we got home, Fraser made dinner and I hit the showers for the third time that day. I didn't even ask Frase to join me because I was just too disgusting. I was a beaten man. It was a struggle to keep my eyes open through dessert, but I managed, I didn't want Fraser to have anything else to sulk about. That's why I let him pick the tv show to watch...well, that and there wasn't a game on anyway. Unfortunately, the coma-inducing documentary on polar fungus did me in. I laid my head in Fraser's lap and fell asleep during the first interview with the fungus expert. I guess the drool spot on his jeans tipped Fraser off that I was sleeping. Next thing I know he's picked me up and carried me to bed like I'm his kid instead of his lover. He helped me strip to my shorts and plugged in my nightlight. I really, really don't like the dark and Fraser doesn't mind the nightlight. Fraser tucked me in and whispered, "Sleep well, Ray," before he kissed me on the forehead. I love it when he does that. It makes me feel all warm and loved, like when I was a kid and somebody else worried about life. "Mmm...g'nigh, Frase," was all I could manage. I hadn't thought about it much, but I guess Fraser is as beat as I was. I wake up from my dream and Fraser is already in bed. I look at the clock and notice it's only 9:30 p.m. That doesn't bother me though...the winter nights get dark early and being in bed with Fraser beats being in bed alone anytime. I can tell Frase showered before he came to bed. He smells so clean and crispy. I think the crispy smell is from the starched boxers he wears, I'm not sure. It's just how he smells to me. I wrap myself around my personal human atomic furnace and drift back to sleep. Just as I slide into oblivion I remember it's the weekend and I feel my lips curl into a smile. Next thing I know, I'm freezing to death. We have a deal, I never put on the heater in the bedroom and Frase never opens the window at night. Usually it works, but right now my nuts are missing so I figure the window must be open. I don't not want to open my eyes, so I start feeling around to see what's up. I can still feel my feet, so there must be a quilt somewhere down there. Sure enough, that's where it is. I pull it up and desperately pull my legs up into my chest trying to get warm. "Damnit Frase," I mutter, "why can't you toss just your half of the quilt off when you're hot? Why do I have to suffer too?" I turn to see if Frase needs the quilt to discover that he's not in the bed anymore. But his side is still warm. Now I can hear Fraser mumbling nearby. My eyes shoot open as I suddenly realize what's going on. Since Frase moved in four months ago, I've seen this happen to him a few times. He never told me he was a sleepwalker. I thought that was just stupid stuff from the movies, but Fraser is living proof that it's real. It can happen after a rough day and usually I can talk him back into bed. I look towards his side of the bed and sure enough, there's Fraser standing with his hands on the headboard...sound asleep. He's blushing in his sleep, that kills me, and his eyes are going a mile a minute under those eyelids. This must be a doozy. Swallowing my knuckles so I don't laugh, I notice that Fraser is actually standing in "the position"...as in "assume the position." 'Oh man,' I'm thinking to myself, 'this is too good to be true. It's payback time.' I bite my hand hard to keep from laughing and slowly slide my way off the bed to stand behind Fraser. He's still out like a light and muttering to himself. I do the natural thing and start patting him down, starting at his ankles. He's obviously enjoying the dream, because his cock jumps and his boxers tent up. I can't resist. Leaning into him, I whisper in his ear, "Oh, so ya like that, do ya buddy?" I know he can answer me when he's sleepwalking. "I, um, er, I'm so sorry, I..I'm..." he babbles. "Well, let me see if I can help out here," I reply, grabbing his cock and stroking it. He gets hard really fast. I can't stop myself from smiling as Fraser turns his head to look at me. Even though his eyes are open now, he's still quite back to reality. "What's the matter Frase, cat got your tongue or are you just catching flies?" I say. "R-Ray, I'm sorry I'm not dressed...couldn't I just go home and put on my clothes? Do you have to arrest me?" That's it, I have to laugh now. Between breaths I say, "Well, if you really want to get dressed, that's okay, Frase, but you're already home. And I guess I could let you off with a warning." Blinking several times, Fraser seems to snap out of it. He looks around himself and groans. I laugh even harder, holding my ribs. "You are so fun when you're zonked out Fraser. Man, you must have the wildest dreams." "You realize I'm going to have to kill you now, don't you Ray?" "Why, just because you sleepwalk and get excited while you're doing it?" "No, not that," Fraser growls. "I have to kill you because you take advantage of me when I am sleepwalking. I've told you that somnambulism is nothing to trifle with." "Huh-uh, Frase," I reason, "I'm just lending a helping hand when you're som...som...zombie-ing around. Besides, you should be glad I hide the house keys so you don't wander around the streets like this." That must have hit close to home,' I think as Fraser shudders. He snarls back, "I'm going to start replacing the candy in your evening coffee with sedatives. It's the only way I'll get any rest." "Aw, c'mon Ben," I say, "you know you can't go back to sleep right away after one of those dreams." Fraser sighs real big and says, "You're right Ray, I'm wide awake now." I let go of him and whisper, "C'mon, let's kiss and make up." Sometimes I forget that Fraser is pretty fast for a big guy and before I know it, he's behind me and has me pushed up against the headboard. I guess it's payback time, but I can go with this. Frase leans against me and whispers into my ear, "Assume the position Ray." Whoa, official horny Mountie talk. I'm hard in an instant and spread my feet apart. I'm sure that moan came from me. I can play this game, "Y- yes sir, officer sir, whatever you say," I reply. Fraser keeps leaning and I can hear him sniffing me. It makes me crazy when he does that. He says he can pick me out of a crowd blindfolded just by my scent. I think the same goes for me. He licks the back of my neck making me shiver and I feel his hands slide down my body to my ankles. Man, I thought I was hard before, but now I'm ready to pound nails as Fraser slowly makes his way up my body. "So you like that, do you Ray?" he teases, throwing my words back at me and lightly brushing his hand against my cock. I groan and nod because I couldn't talk now if you paid me. Fraser slips into his role now. "Well, I think a strip search may be in order. I've heard you Chicago toughs hide weapons in the most unlikely places." I willingly join in the fantasy, growling back, "You won't find anything on me, cop." "Oh...a challenge...I like that," he whispers. Putting a firm hand on the back of my neck, he licks his way across my back and down my outstretched arm to reach for the handcuffs I've tossed in the headboard. I flashback to the first week we got that headboard. It's a combo bookcase headboard and I smacked my head on it three times the first week before my body figured out that migrating north while I'm asleep is a bad idea. "I'm just going to secure you for my own protection, sir," says Fraser in his best official Mountie tone, "you are not under arrest at this time." "You can't touch me and you know it," I pant because my imagination is running wild in the streets by now. "Oh, but I can sir, the law states that I can search you if I have probable cause...and it looks to me like you may be concealing a weapon." Fraser looks at the front of my shorts. "I've got a permit for that, I'll be out in an hour and you'll be out of a job when my lawyer hears about this." "Well, we'll let the judge decide that sir," Fraser replies. My knees are wobbly and I can't help but sway a little when he snaps the first cuff on my wrist. He steadies me and brings my left hand behind my back to join the right in the cuffs. That's it, I'm officially too turned on for my own good. Fraser turns me to face him and pushes me back against the wall. I open my mouth to protest and it's filled with hot Mountie tongue. I can't remember what I was going to say anyway. I feel a bare knee force its way between my thighs and I can't stop myself from rubbing against it. Fraser grabs my hair and pulls my head back to get at my neck. I feel a tongue sliding down to my collarbone and then teeth biting me hard there. "Ow," I say with a gasp and again find my mouth filled with Fraser's tongue. Frase is as hot as I am as he grabs my cock through my shorts. I want to see what he's doing, but he won't let go of my hair. I think he likes my hair a lot. Sometimes he just pets me like Dief for hours. I can see what the furball likes about that. "Oh, yes, sir," he pants, "I'm afraid that this is an illegal weapon." He's still trying to play the game, but I've lost that train of thought. "Huh?" I say. "I'm going to have to confiscate this, and I'm afraid you'll have to come with me." "Uh...uh...OK," I reply. It's the best I can do under the circumstances. I can't see anything but the ceiling right now, but I can feel Fraser trying to take off my shorts with one hand. I'm so hot that I'm sweating and Fraser decides to help me out there. His hand is back on my cock, minus the shorts this time, and he's licking up my sweat and working his way down my chest. He knows my nips are extra sensitive, so of course, he lingers there. Payback is a bitch. "Fraser..." I moan, "don't do that...and let go of my hair." "Oh, I will Ray," he says, "as soon as you promise to never give a doughnut to Diefenbaker without my prior permission." "But he likes them Frase...ooohhhh, God..." He's biting them now. He knows I can't take that. I try squirming away, but with one hand in my hair and the other around my cock, Frase has total control of me. "Diefenbaker likes lots of things Ray, but he can't have doughnuts everyday." "It's against my rights to be tortured," I say, trying to draw Fraser back into the game. He gives an evil chuckle. "It's your word against mine. No one will ever believe a two-bit hood such as yourself." "Oh shit...Fraser....please..." "Please what, Ray? It's simple really, swear out a promise and the torture stops. Don't...and...it...may...never...end." He says that last part with a swirl around my nipple for every word. "Okay, okay," I gasp. "I say whatever you want...just stop, I'm dying here." "Repeat after me," he says, switching nipples. "I...Ray...Kowalski..." He's doing the swirl thing again with every word. I'm going to die if this is a very long promise. "I...oh God...Ray...Kowalski..." I pant. "do...hereby...solemnly...promise..." "do...unhh...hereby...solemnly...promise...I'm going to kill you Frase..." "to...only...feed...Diefenbaker...a...doughnut...with...Fraser's...approva l." "to...only...feed...Diefenbaker...a...doughnut...with...Fraser's...approva l...oh god." Fraser lifts his head, takes his hand out of my hair and says, "that wasn't so bad, was it?" I briefly think about head-butting him, but I don't know where the keys to the cuffs are and he might wake up before I can get them off. "Please, Frase..." I'm begging now and I don't care. "Please what, Ray? Would you like to have sex? Or perhaps I should let you sleep, you've had a rough day. Yes, that's the ticket. Just come over to the bed with me and I'll make sure you get a good night's rest." Torture Fraser is on a roll and I can't stop him. I'll have to resort to the ultimate weapon. "No, please Fraser, please have sex with me, I promise to behave...please?" That does it, three pleases in one sentence blow the Mountie's mind. He picks me up and drops me down on the bed before shedding his own boxers and t-shirt. He bypasses my nipples (thank God) and heads straight for the main event. I yelp as he licks my cock from root to head and then swirls his tongue around the crown. He likes doing the swirly thing a lot. I buck up against him but he's got both hands on my hips holding me down. He wants to retain control. Like I could do a lot with my hands locked behind me. He slides one hand up to my mouth and forces two fingers in. I lick and suck them for all I'm worth, giving him a little bite just to let him know I'm not completely out of the game. He hums around my cock and pushes one of the fingers I just sucked into my ass. I can't take anymore and come hard. I'm yelling and crying and Fraser's sucking and swallowing as fast as he can. I feel myself slipping into what I'm sure is a coma when he pushes the second finger in with the first and crawls up to kiss me. I can taste myself on his tongue as it heads towards my tonsils. I can also feel a recognizable piece of Fraser rocking into my belly. When he comes up for air, I beg him again. "Please, Fraser, please take me now." Okay, I may have overdone the please thing, but I know it turns him on because his fingers are gone and he's got his hands on my ankles pushing my knees up into my armpits. I feel his slippery cock nudging my ass and then he's in and he's groaning and hissing. I'm guessing it feels good from his side too. He starts to move and I can feel him hit my prostate on the next stroke. If I hadn't just come like a geyser, I'd be hard and good to go. As it is, the bumps against that spot feel good and tingly. The game has gone on a long time and now Fraser is working towards his climax. I'm pushing up to meet his thrusts as best I can, but he's really doing all the work. I can see he's hovering on the edge, so I wrap a leg around his waist and kick a heel into his ass saying, "Please come for me Fraser." With a kinda sexy, kinda scary roar, Fraser loses his rhythm and buries himself deep in my ass. I can feel him coming and shaking and it feels good to know he's enjoyed it. Fraser flops over onto me, pushing my knees into my ears, which are pounding now with the renewed blood flow to the area. "Frase," I manage to squeak out, "you're kinda heavy there buddy." Nothing. Geez, maybe I killed him. "Frase, could you please get off of me, I'm getting squished." "Wha...Oh! I'm sorry Ray." He gently withdraws and reaches up to kiss me. I suck on his tongue and bite his lips. He leans back and says, "Goodnight Ray, sleep well." "Fraser, unlock the cuffs before you go to sleep. C'mon...Frase?" "I'm not sure Ray, you might take revenge in the night." "Well, if you don't, the only revenge I'll be able to take is to pee on you." "Oh, right, well, I need you to promise me you won't attack me before morning." "Fraser," I growl in warning. "Well, if you can't promise, I'll have to risk the urine assault." "Okay, okay, I promise not to attack you before morning. There... satisfied." "Yes, very much so, Ray. Just turn over." I turn over and Fraser finds the key and unlocks the cuffs. I rub my wrists like they do on TV because it seems like a good idea. Fraser grabs my hands and kisses my wrists gently before running his tongue around each one. "If you don't want to be attacked before morning Mountie, you'd better not do things like that," I warn him. Fraser smiles at me. "Yes sir, officer sir, whatever you say."