By Day and Night	

Disclaimer: This story is written for the private entertainment of fans.
The author makes no claims on the characters or their portrayal by the
creation of this story. Fraser, Vecchio, et.al. belong to Alliance; the
McKenzies and friends belong to me; Cat Madden belongs to Carol Trendall
and is used with permission. No infringement of any copyrights held by
CBS, Alliance, CTV or any other copyright holders of DUE SOUTH is
intended. This story is not published for profit, and the author does not
give permission for this story to be reproduced for profit. 

By Day and Night 

By Cassandra Hope 

(Copyright April 1997) 

  

Ray dug through his bag searching for a clean shirt. 'Pack lightly,' he
silently mouthed the words of advice given him by a certain friend who
should remain nameless. Glancing at the door of the tent, he sighed in
frustration then upended the bag and shook everything out. Leaning
forward, he dug through the clothing revealed, his spirits sinking with
the realization that everything he had had been worn at least twice
already. Settling back on his heels, he ran a hand over his thinning hair
and thought wistfully of his closet of Armani suits and silk shirts. He
silently vowed to burn each and every article of clothing now strewn
across the floor of his tent. Grabbing the nearest T-shirt, he fed his
lanky body into it and began shoving the remainder of the clothes into the
bag. A small plastic coated box fell free of the heavy sweater he'd never
needed. Picking it up, he smiled for the first time that morning. Who had
stuffed this disposable camera in his bag? 'Probably Frannie hoping I'll
get a picture of Benny in the buff! Boy, is she in for a surprise!'  

Ben chose that moment to stick his head through the flap of the doorway.
"Breakfast is about ready, Ray. Do you need some help with the tent?" 

"Thanks, Benny. I couldn't find a clean shirt but I did find this." He
held out the camera to Ben. 

Taking it from Ray, Ben looked it over before handing it back.
"Interesting concept, Ray, however, I would not consider this to be
environmentally conscious. Look at all the excess packaging and..." 

"Benny!" Ray growled in exasperation, "It's a disposable camera, for
crying out loud. It's for those people that don't have a camera or don't
wanna damage their's by getting it wet or loosing it in a rapid or
dropping it off a cliff..." 

"Ah, understood but why have you waited until the last moment to bring it
forth? You have missed some exceptional photo opportunities." 

"Didn't know I had it, Benny. Frannie must have snuck it in my gear when I
wasn't looking." 

"Why would she do that?" 

Ray cocked an elegant eyebrow. "Why do you think?" He grinned lewdly as
the blush crept into the Mountie's cheeks. 

"Here," he passed the camera back to Ben, "I though you might like to use
it." 

"Why, thank you, Ray, but I can wait for the trip album." 

"That's not what I meant, Benny. You might want to use it to get some
photos of things that might not be in the trip album." 

"Like what, Ray?" 

"Oh, I don't know--photos of the person who takes the photos for the
album?" He let the suggestion hang on the air before continuing, "I have a
sneaking suspicion that our erstwhile leader will not be in many of the
photos in the album. So..." Ray proffered the camera once more. 

Understanding at last, Ben accepted the camera. Momentarily taken aback,
all he could say was "Thank you, Ray. I would definitely like to do that."


Ray smiled broadly and, tossing his bag at his friend, said, "Let's get
this tent down so we can have some breakfast." 

	 * * *	 

"Well, at least we don't have to face Lava Falls today. In fact," Travis
paused and glanced over to where Ray was sitting beside Phil, "the next
two days will be pretty mild. It's a good chance for you to hone your
river-running skills, Ben." Travis liked the Mountie. He was a quick
learner and seemed to know how to read the river and interpret its many
moods. Clapping a hand on Ben's shoulder, he waved toward the river with
his other hand. "If you ever decide that being a Mountie isn't for you,
you've got a job here with us. We could use someone with your abilities." 

Ben smiled with genuine pleasure. He, in turn, liked the Hunter brothers
and it warmed his heart to realize that he had made some new friends. A
brief thought flashed across his mind and he quickly shuttered it away.
Why should it bother him that the men in Phil's life were the kind of men
that he respected and wanted as friends--men such as TJ, Rob, Lloyd, and
now the Hunter brothers? Was Martin of the same cut? How could he not be,
if Phil loved him? His heart sank slightly and to cover his errant
thoughts, focused his attention on Travis, answering the complement that
had been given him. "Thank you kindly, Travis. That means a lot to me, but
I'm afraid I must decline. The RCMP is my life and I don't think that will
ever change." 

"That's too bad, Ben, because you'd make a first-class pilot." They shared
smiles and the kinship of fellow river-runners. The breakfast line inched
forward and they loaded their plates with French toast and slices of fresh
melon. The two men wandered down to the dories and settled on the ground
beside the Flaming Gorge. 

After quietly eating for several minutes, Ben leaned closer to Travis and
asked, "Is there a chance that I could navigate one of the tougher rapids
before this trip ends?" 

Travis smiled wickedly then shrugged his shoulders. "Well, you know, Ben,
regulations forbid inexperienced pilots from negotiating the heavier
rapids while transporting passengers. However, there are a couple of 7's
on this stretch that aren't too bad. If you feel up to it, you might give
one of them a try. Now, if you'd think about joining us, I'm sure we could
get you through the preliminaries fairly quickly and let you try Hance or
Crystal or even Lava Falls!" 

Ben chuckled. "I'm sure you could and that certainly makes your offer more
attractive. I'll have to think about it." But they both knew that Ben was
only joking. * * * 

Phil one-handedly attempted to squeeze some zinc oxide from what remained
in the tube she had brought with her from Chicago. Grimacing in
frustration, she whirled when Ray spoke to her. 

"Can I give you a hand with that crap?" 

"Uh, Ray, uh..." Phil stammered then sighed resignedly. "Yeah, I could use
your help, Ray. I'm about as helpless as they come with this thing." She
waved her bandaged hand at him. 

"Accidents happen," Ray said as he took the tube from her unresisting
hand. Squeezing a liberal quantity on the tips of his fingers, he
proceeded to paint Phil's face. 

Phil kept her eyes downcast. She didn't want Ray to see the truth in her
eyes. She was afraid that Ray would be able to tell that that little
accident had been something else entirely and she wasn't ready to justify
her actions to Ray or anyone else. How could she when she couldn't justify
them to herself? 

Ben smiled as he clicked another photo of Ray's artistic endeavor on the
canvas of Phil's face. Lowering the camera, he guiltily hid it inside his
hat not wanting Phil to see it. His efforts were futile. 

"Ben, if you want a picture of me just say so," Phil drawled as she and
Ray approached the Mountie. 

"I didn't think you would..." Ben mumbled as he gestured with his hands. 

"Why ever not? I've gotten used to every Tom, Dick, and Harry on these
trips wanting a picture of me. Why would I object to you wanting one as
well?" In some small part of her mind she knew that she was pleased that
he wanted to capture her image. After all, she took photos of him whenever
she could. Maybe they were just trying to torture themselves with these
reminders of the past. Phil chose not to investigate that thought further.
 

"I thought..." 

"I know what you thought, Ben," she interrupted, "but you were wrong. Just
let me get myself situated and you can take all the photos you want." She
swept her hair out of her face, tugged on the hem of her shirt then her
shorts, shaking first one leg then the other. Finally, she was ready. 

"Here, take a picture of my best side." She struck an exaggerated pose,
her hands on her hips, her head tilted upward, her profile to Ben and Ray.
Before Ben could raise the camera, she shifted bringing her body and head
around 180o. "Wait, this is my best side." She posed once more placing a
foot on a large rock. As Ben once more raised the camera, she moved yet
again. Facing Ray and Ben, she said, "Wait, I don't have a best side. I
guess you'll have to be satisfied with plain ol' me." 

"What did I tell you about running down my friends?" Ray jokingly reminded
her. 

Phil chuckled lightly and Ben captured her sparkling eyes and infectious
grin. The white of the zinc oxide only added to the appeal of her face. He
knew he would treasure this photo.  

Phil posed for a couple more photos, striking exaggerated poses ranging
from a classic body-builder's stance to one as a heroine in a silent
movie. Ray laughed heartily at Phil's antics and silently thanked whoever
had placed the camera in his bag. 

Ben clicked the photos of Phil amazed that she was even letting him take
them much less clown for the camera. The Phil he had known all those years
ago had avoided this kind of public display. This Phil seemed to know how
to get away with such outrageous behavior. It seemed like second nature to
her. What had happened in the years that separated them to bring her this
far out of the shell she had lived behind? His pleasure of the moment
dissipated with the realization that if he had made a different choice all
those years ago he might know the answer to that question now. 

"Okay, now that I've thoroughly convinced you that I'm slightly
unhinged..." Phil laughed outright at the identical lifting of an eyebrow
on both men's face, "Okay, very unhinged, it's time to get this show on
the road." Coming up between the two men, she looped an arm around one of
their arms and headed toward where the dories awaited. Releasing her hold
on them, she pointed to the ground and made motions indicating they should
sit. Both men stared at each other before dropping to the ground. 

Phil strolled over to the Glen Canyon and withdrew the small book from her
pack. Turning to face the group of people gathered around the dories, she
leaned back against the Glen Canyon and cleared her throat, beginning:	  
 

	August 26--The canyon walls are steadily becoming higher as we
advance...  

Since we left the Colorado Chiquito, we have seen no evidences that the
tribe of Indians inhabiting the plateaus on either side ever come down to
the river; but about eleven o'clock today we discover an Indian
garden...The corn is looking quite well, but is not sufficiently advanced
to give us roasting ears; but there are some nice, green squashes. We
carry ten or a dozen of these on board our boats, and hurriedly leave, not
willing to be caught in the robbery, yet excusing ourselves by pleading
our great want...Never was fruit so sweet as these stolen squashes. 

After dinner we push on again, making fine time, finding many rapids, but
none so bad that we cannot run them with safety, and when we stop, just at
dusk, and foot up our reckoning, we find we have run thirty-five miles
again. 

What a supper we make; unleavened bread, green squash sauce, and strong
coffee. We have been for a few days on half rations, but we have no stint
of roast squash. 

A few days like this, and we shall be out of prison. ***  

"We have so little time left of our journey through this marvelous canyon,
I hope these last few days are as enjoyable as the preceding ones have
been. And...I, for one, am thankful that Lava Falls is behind us and there
is nothing like that ahead of us. Maybe next year I'll make it through
Lava Falls but, then again, with my luck I may never make it!" 

"Ah, Spuds, that's what you always say," Terry called to her. 

"Well?" 

"On second thought, maybe you won't!" 

"Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, Terry." * * * 

The dories pulled away from Whitmore Wash at mile 188. A short stop had
been made here to look at yet another set of pictographs found within the
depths of the Grand Canyon. Drifting peacefully down the river, Ray pulled
his hat down over his face and, stretching out his legs, reclined in the
stern of the Glen Canyon. Phil trailed her uninjured hand over the side of
the dory bringing it up and watching the water drip from her fingers. She
was tempted to flick some on Ray but he looked too comfortable and she
decided to spare him. Now if it had been Ben sitting beside her she might
have gone with her original impulse. 

Travis's arms moved with a liquidity that spoke of years of rowing
experience. He loved the river and felt most alive when travelling on it.
He smiled at Phil and Ray in the stern of the Glen Canyon and, squinting
at the ribbon of sky visible above him, said in passing, "With the weather
holding like it is, we should get in some great stargazing at Granite Park
tonight." 

Phil eagerly nodded her head in agreement with Travis' proclamation. 

"Stargazing? How in the hell can you stargaze when you can barely see the
sky?" Ray spoke through his hat laconically waving a hand toward the
canyon walls. 

Phil playfully slapped Ray on the arm. "For most of the Canyon that's true
but at Granite Park the Canyon widens out and on moonless nights the sky
blazes with an eternity of starlight." 

Ray pushed his hat off of his face and squinted at Phil. "An eternity of
starlight? Sounds a little too good to believe. So are we gonna have a
moonless night so I can see what an 'eternity of starlight' looks like?" 

"We'll have a new moon tomorrow night so the viewing should be fantastic."
Phil sighed and closed her eyes, a secretive smile playing across her
lips. "The Canyon under a starlit night--it's one of the most romantic
sights I have ever seen!" 

Ray watched the wistful look change as her eyes opened then danced with
laughter. "Is that so?" His eyebrow rose as if to say 'I don't believe
you'. 

"Yeah, we should be able to see a lot--much more than you can see in
Chicago on a clear night!"  

"Now don't start running down my hometown." 

"Now Ray, you have to admit that Chicago has nothing to compare with
this," she exclaimed as she swept an arm out to include the river and the
ever-present canyon walls. "Where can you see something like that?" she
asked as she pointed to a lava flow that cascaded over the rim of the
canyon and flowed down to river level. As they drew level with the lava
flow, Phil pointed to the flow itself. "Lava when it cools rapidly forms
cracks in a regular pattern. From the side these cracks or joints makes
the rock look like a series of columns. That's why it's called columnar
jointing. This is a really great exposure. Admit it, Ray, you can't see
anything like this in Chicago!" 

Ray rolled his eyes but grudgingly said, "Okay, I admit that there are
some things here that you can't see in Chicago but you have to admit that
Chicago has it's finer points, too!" 

"Well, it does have a great museum and if I ever get sick the only place I
want to go is to Cook County Hospital. My brother, Rob, is on the staff
there." 

"Rob? As in Robert McKenzie?" Ray asked with a trace of astonishment in
his voice. Was the doctor that had treated Ben's injuries Phil's brother? 

"Yes! Have you met him?" 

"I'm not sure. There was this Dr. McKenzie that treated Ben when he was in
the hospital. He was one hard ass of doctor but he did let Dief stay with
Ben." 

"That sounds like Rob and I know for a fact that he treated Ben when he
was in the hospital. So, that hard ass must have been my big brother," she
spoke with pride and love in her voice. 

"He really came down hard on me and Cat Madden the first time he was in
there." 

"Let me guess--you were upsetting Ben and Rob told you to take it
elsewhere or he'd kick you out." 

"Worse! He threatened to not let us see him." 

"I bet that didn't sit well with Cat. I can just imagine her trying to
order Rob around and not having much luck." 

"Well, she did manage to convince your brother to let us bring Dief in.
Ben really needed him." 

"Rob is like that. Whatever it takes is what he'll do. Ben couldn't have a
better doctor and I'm not just saying that 'cause he's my brother! Rob is
one of the best doctors that hospital has." A brief image of Martin
crossed her mind and guilt briefly assaulted her thoughts. Resolutely, she
squashed the guilt. She would not spend her last days on this trip feeling
guilty. It wasn't as if she hadn't invited him to accompany her on one of
these trips. He'd just laughed and said something about not having the
time or the desire to 'rough it'. She wondered if that would change after
they were married--if she married him. 

"Well, for what he's done for Ben, I couldn't agree more." Ray
wholeheartedly agreed. 

Silently, Phil agreed as she shook loose from the thoughts of Martin and
their impending engagement. 

Straightening from his recline position, Ray stretched widely then dropped
his hands to hang between his knees. "You know, Phil, I hate to admit it
but I've really enjoyed myself. I'm going to miss this bunch of nuts when
this trip is over." 

"I know what you mean, Ray. I feel that way every time I make this trip. I
guess that's why I keep coming back." 

"That's what keeps me here," Travis added as he swung the oars for another
stroke. Phil smiled in acknowledgement. 

Digging under her seat, she brought forth her waterproof bag and withdrew
a map of the Canyon. She studied it for a minute before handing it to Ray.
"See if you can locate yourself on the map, Ray," she instructed. 

Ray studied the map quickly locating Lava Falls Rapid and Whitmore Wash.
Using an elegant index finger, he pointed to a spot on the map. "Here," he
said. 

"That's pretty good, Ray. See...you've learned an important survival
skill--how to read a topo map." 

"Yeah, I can just see how much I'm gonna need this when I get back to
Chicago." Phil laughed. Ray sighed then turned his attention back to the
map paying particular attention to the course of the river. He glanced up
from the map. "What's this 'book of worms' written here on this map?" 

"The 'book of worms'? Gosh, I haven't visited that in I don't know how
long. What do you say we stop and take a look?" 

"You can do that? You can just stop this trip to hunt up some worms when
you want to?" 

"It's my party and I'll cry if I want to, cry if I want to," Phil's
shoulder's bobbed as she sang. 

"I guess that means yes," Ray sighed. 

"Yes, Ray, that means yes," Phil laughed before turning to Travis. "What
do you say, Travis? Shall we stop at Parashant Wash?" 

"You haven't gone looking for the 'book of worms' in several years, Spuds.
Do you think you can still find it?" Travis smirked.  

Phil's answer was to scoop up a handful of water and splash it on him.
Travis leered back at her and with a flick of his wrist sent a wave of
water over the stern of the dory with one of the oars.	

"Shit!" Ray shot to his feet. He wobbled unevenly as he tried to wring
some of the water from his T-shirt. "Warn me when you're going to do that!
I'll jump out of the boat so you two can go at each other without me in
the way." 

"Oh, Ray, I'm so sorry." Phil pulled him back down onto the seat beside
her.  

"No, I should be the one that apologizes," Travis interrupted her. "It's
just..." 

"When you get the chance to pay her back, you go it," Ray finished for
him. 

"You got it, Ray." Turning his attention back to Phil, he said, "Parashant
Wash and the 'book of worms' coming right up, Spuds." Travis steered the
dory within shouting distance of the other boats and let them know of the
change of plans. At mile 198, the flotilla pulled ashore and a small group
of people followed Phil up the wash in search of the 'book of worms'. 

"What exactly is this 'book of worms', Phil?" Ben queried when he found
himself walking beside her. 

"It's a huge rock that has fossilized worm burrows on it. I've even heard
of someone finding some trilobites in the general area but we won't have
time to do more than a cursory look around. Who knows, maybe someone will
get lucky and find one."  

Recognizing the terrain, Phil jogged ahead and brought the group to a halt
before a large block of rock that at one time must have been higher on the
cliff face. The face of the block was marred with irregular ripples and
grooves that crisscrossed each other--trace fossils created by mud filling
the space left by burrowing worms in some ancient sea.	

"The 'book of worms'?" Ray skeptically asked. 

Phil grinned widely. "The 'book of worms' and I found it on the first
try!" 

"Yeah, and I can't tell you how thrilled I am." Ray sighed deeply. "You
have absolutely made my day, Phil. What else could possibly top this?" 

Ben cleared his throat. Ray glanced at him expectantly. "Well, spit it
out, Benny! You've been looking like the cat that ate the canary all
morning. What is it?" 

A smile of anticipation spread across Ben's face. "Travis says that I can
pilot the dory through one of the remaining big rapids." 

Ray exhaled deeply, placing his hands on his hips. He stared at the ground
for a moment before lifting his eyes to glare at his friend. "And this is
supposed to make me happy?" 

"Ah..." 

"Don't answer that, Benny, or I won't be responsible for what happens." 

"Ah, understood, Ray." 

Staring at the verbal sparring match, Phil suddenly broke into gales of
laughter. Each time she looked at either Ben or Ray the chuckles began
again. They in turn simply stared at her. Shaking her head helplessly, she
started back down the trail toward the river and the dories that waited to
continue the journey. Her laughter drifted back to the two men. 

"That's one strange woman there, Benny," Ray commented. 

"Ah, yes she is, Ray, yes she is." 

"I could get used to it though." Startled, Ben stared at his partner as
Ray continued, "One things for certain, life with her would never be
dull." 

As much as he wanted to tell Ray to keep his hands off, he restrained
himself and only said, "On that we are in agreement, Ray."  

Ray nodded with his head toward the trail and the rest of the group that
had already started back to the river. "Shall we?" Ben nodded and the two
men hiked back down the small wash. * * * 

Travis shipped his oars and let the Glen Canyon drift toward the shore.
The rest of the flotilla followed. Jutting out from the bank was a narrow
orange and buff travertine deposit. The travertine wall separated the
brown waters of Pumpkin Spring from the waters of the Colorado. A small
trickle of water spilled over the lip.	

"We're in luck, Spuds. The water level is low enough that the spring is
visible." 

Phil nodded her head in agreement before saying, "I was afraid that it
wouldn't be! I'm glad the river is low enough so that we can stop here." 

Mara stood beside the Flaming Gorge and watched Ben help Phil from the
Glen Canyon. After last night's debacle, she had spent a sleepless night
trying to figure where she'd gone wrong. Just seeing Ben's solicitous
concern for Phil set her teeth on edge. It wasn't fair. Why couldn't
someone as nice and good-looking as the Mountie be interested in her? What
was it about Phil that attracted him? Why was he interested in someone who
wasn't interested in him? 

Unaware of Mara's deliberations, Ben and Phil joined the group around the
spring. Several people climbed over the travertine lip and waded into the
spring itself. Phil declined to do so not wanting to chance injuring her
hand further. She urged Ben to join Ray who had started a water fight with
Karen Sloan. "I'll be fine, Ben. I don't want to get this bandage wet. Go
and enjoy yourself." She waved him off. Ben glanced once more with her
then did as she bid. 

"What does he see in you?" Mara asked from behind Phil's back. 

Without turning around, Phil answered, "I don't know, Mara. I've asked
myself that question so many times that I've lost track. I never knew why
he fell in love with me 12 years ago and I still don't know why he's
interested today." 

Mara's mind reeled with the implications. So Ben hadn't fallen in love
with Phil over the space of this trip. This was something that had started
many years ago but, evidently, Phil did not feel the same toward him. "Why
don't you tell him to leave you alone if you aren't interested in him?"
she asked. 

Phil sighed deeply, then turned to face the girl. "What ever gave you the
idea that I wasn't interested in him? Just because I choose not to parade
my private life before everyone doesn't mean that I'm not..." Phil stopped
realizing what she had almost said. "I'm sorry, Mara, but whatever exists
between Ben and me is really none of your concern. I did try to warn
you..." 

"Yeah, you did. I wish someone loved me as much as he seems to care for
you." She paused a moment before continuing, "Look, Phil, uh
I've...I'm...I need to apologize for the way I've acted. I didn't know
there was something between you two." 

"That's all right, Mara, no one was supposed to know. I didn't even know
he was a part of this group until I arrived at Lee's Ferry. You could've
knocked me over with a feather!" 

"Well, I just wanted to say I'm sorry that I acted the way I did. He's
just so good-looking and nice to everyone. It must be wonderful being
loved by someone that treats you right." 

"Yes, it is, Mara, but don't let that package fool you. Ben has his darker
side. After all, he's human just like the rest of us." 

Mara nodded her head and continued to watch the others. Phil sighed
inwardly, thankful that this awkward situation seemed to have been
resolved. The two women watched the others explore the spring then gather
near the boats. It was time to load up and head to Mile 205 Rapid, one of
the few remaining big rapids on this stretch of the river.  

Phil sat in the stern of the Glen Canyon and stared past Travis to Ben and
Ray in the bow. She had almost told Mara that she loved Ben. How could she
do that? She loved Martin, didn't she? Closing her eyes, she sought to
draw forth images of Martin. Beside Ben's vibrant warmth, Martin's images
were pale wraiths that faded quickly from her thoughts. How could she
possibly love Ben after what he'd put her through? How could she not love
him? He was her soul mate.  

"That's quite a view, isn't it?" Kim asked. 

Jarred from her thoughts, Phil straightened on the seat and smiled at Kim
who shared the stern with her. "Depends. Do you mean the river or the bow
of this boat?" 

Kim quirked an eyebrow before laughingly replying, "Both!" 

"I couldn't agree more," Phil answered. 

The dories quickly negotiated Mile 205, neatly avoiding the large hole on
the right. Travis winked at Phil before calling over his shoulder, "Mile
217 Rapid is not much worse than this, Ben. Would you like to try your
hand at it tomorrow? We'll hit it fairly early in the morning." 

"Yes, thank you kindly, Travis," Ben replied with pleasure in his voice.  

"Well, count me out, Benny. I ain't been tossed from a boat yet and I
don't plan on letting that happen tomorrow," Ray commented. 

"It's not that bad, Ray. I managed Lava Falls and Phil has..." Ben's voice
trailed off as Ray pointedly gazed at the graze on his arm and Phil's
bandaged hand. 

"Thanks, but no thanks, Benny. I'll stay right here where it's safe and
dry." 

The others in the dory shared a laugh at Ray's expense. Phil played with
the thought of arranging a dunking for Ray but decided that with her
injured hand it might backfire. Clicking her tongue with frustration, she
let that thought flow out of her mind. She'd have to think of something
else. As the afternoon drew to a close, Granite Park came into sight. . *
* * 

With the dinner of baked roasted ham, Phil's sesame seed cauliflower,
mashed potatoes, coleslaw, and Travis' brownies with whipped cream for
dessert now over, the various members of the group set about enjoying
their last couple of evenings in the Canyon. A small group gathered around
the fire and Terry's guitar sang in the darkening evening. Several men
headed in the direction of the dories.	

Standing apart from everyone, Phil listened to the soulful music wafting
from the direction of the fire. Did she want to join them or the group at
the dories? Glancing around the campsite, she recognized Ray's lean form,
as he stood, back to the fire, and stared at the darkening sky. Recalling
what they had discussed earlier that morning, Phil made up her mind. She'd
told Ray of the fantastic stargazing and that's what she would do now. She
gathered a couple of beers from Travis' stash and approached Ray. Holding
the beers aloft, she asked, "Ray, I was about to head up to my favorite
spot to do some stargazing. Care to join me?" 

Ray's head whipped around. Spying the cans of beer, his eyes widened.
After the tale of 'Spuds' McKenzie, he understood Phil's reluctance to
join the group when Travis had broken out his stash. What was she doing
with a couple of cans now? Curiosity piqued, he nodded his head as he
replied, "I'd love to, Phil. What about Benny?" 

"What about him?" Phil motioned toward the boats where Ben was deep in a
discussion with Travis, Terry, and the other boatmen. "As you can see,
he's occupied for who knows how long?" 

Ray grimaced slightly thinking that the group of men were undoubtedly
plotting yet another day of torture for him. "Yeah, I can see your point.
All right, I'll come with you. Besides I like the idea of finding a dark
secluded spot with you and seeing just how romantic this starry night can
be." He wiggled his eyebrows in his best imitation of a lecherous glare.
Phil only laughed at him. * * * 

Ray relaxed back against the large boulder that seemed shaped for
lounging. He drained the last of his beer and tossed the can to lay beside
Phil's. "This is incredible, Phil! I never knew there were this many
stars. Is it always like this?" His eyes sought Phil's but the sliver of
moon did not provide enough illumination for that. Phil's face remained
cloaked by shadows.  

"Pretty much so. Sometimes it's worse, sometimes it's better. As the moon
waxes it washes out a lot of the fainter stars--but you can still see the
Milky Way. That's Scorpio and, of course, you know Ursa Major and Ursa
Minor--the Big and Little Dippers. That's Draco and Cassiopea..." Her
extended arm pointed to various constellations. 

Her eyes wandered across the night sky until she found the two bright
stars of Gemini, a yellow one and a white one, low on the horizon. Ben's
voice whispered in her mind, 'That bright white star is Castor and that
bright yellow star next to it is Pollux. Every time I gaze into the night
sky and see these two stars, I'll think of you, Phil.' Even the night sky
reminded her of Ben and their lost love. Sighing raggedly, she drew her
thoughts from the 'what-might-have-beens' to the here and now. Glancing at
Ray, she noticed that he was not studying the sky. "Ray, you aren't paying
attention to what I'm saying." 

"That's okay, Phil. If I'd wanted a lesson in astronomy I'd have asked
Benny. No, I just like to hear you talk. Do you know your voice is kinda
soft and velvety? I love to hear you talk." 

Phil chuckled softly. "Soft and velvety? No, I've never heard it described
like that. Ben once said my voice was like the sounds of a stream in the
dark. I don't think he had the Colorado River in mind when he said that,
though!" 

"You know what, Phil?" Ray straightened and leaned closer to her. 

"What, Ray?" 

"I've really enjoyed this trip. Mind you, I'll never let Benny know that
but I've enjoyed getting to know you. And I never realized just how
beautiful this desert can be." Ray's voice echoed with wonder. 

"I know what you mean, Ray. There's a quote by John Priestly that says it
all: 'this country is geology by day and astronomy by night.' I don't
think I could have expressed it any better." She sighed and leaned forward
drawing her knees up to her chest. "I love being out here like this. I
have to get away from the city every now and then to get my head back on
straight. City life and I don't seem to agree. Someday I'll move back to
the mountains." 

Ray drew his knees up in imitation of Phil's pose. "You sound just like
Benny. City life and he don't get along well either. I'm gonna miss him
when he finally transfers back to the armpit of nowhere." His voice was
thick and unsteady. 

Phil reached across the distance that separated them and squeezed his arm.
"I know you will, Ray. Just like I missed him when he left me." An awkward
silence fell between them. 

Ray cleared his throat, then whispered hoarsely, "I'm sorry, Phil. I
didn't mean to bring up sad memories for you." 

"You haven't, Ray. I can't help but remember all the things that happened
between Ben and me. With him here as a constant reminder, how could I not
remember what we once had?" 

Ray's interest was aroused. "Do you think you two will get back together?"


"I don't know, Ray." She turned her face to him. "Anyway, I'd rather not
discuss Ben. After all, I'm out here with you, not him." A deep chuckle
greeted her as they watched the tiniest sliver of a moon slowly navigate
across the night sky. 

"It's getting late, I guess we should start back." The words said so but
the voice said she would like to stay longer. "We've got an early morning
tomorrow." 

"Phil, thanks for sharing your shelf with me tonight." His voice was a
velvet murmur. 

"It was my pleasure, Ray. I've enjoyed being up here with you." 

They stood, gathered the empty cans, and headed back to the lip of the
shelf and the incline they had climbed to reach this perch. Ray placed a
hand on Phil's arm and stopped their progress. She swung around and smiled
crookedly at him. Ray sighed at unexpected opportunities. "Phil, I just
wanted you to know that I'm attracted to you and if I didn't love someone
else and you didn't love someone else, I'd give Benny a run for his money.
He said I would like you and he was right--as usual!" He looked deeply
into the shadows of her coffee-brown eyes and asked, "Would you be
terribly offended if I kissed you? I mean I don't want you hurting your
hand again." 

"I think it's a little late to be asking that considering that you've
already kissed me...more than once!" Gently teasing, she moved into the
circle of his arms. The kiss was short but held a wealth of promise behind
it. Phil stared into Ray's face, illumined by the faint moonlight. His
hazel eyes darkened with emotion. She felt his arms slide around her and
pull her closer to his body. She ran her tongue across her parted lips at
a loss for words. 

Ray stared in fascination as different emotions flitted across Phil's
barely visible face. Why had he kissed her? Why was he holding her so
close now? It just seemed the right thing to do. He stared into her brown
eyes and watched something stir in their depths. He watched her tongue
glide sensuously over her lips and gave into the desire to taste her lips
once more. This kiss was longer as Ray's tongue stroked the satin of her
lips and, as they parted, he gained entrance to the softness of her mouth.
He felt her arms move around his body to hold him tightly as she molded
her body to his. 

Briefly, Phil wondered about Casey. Did she know what she was missing? How
could she stand by and not claim Ray's love? Surely she wouldn't let
anything stand between them, would she? 'But that's exactly what you're
doing to yourself,' her conscious interrupted, 'you're letting your pride
and your hurt feelings stand between you and the love you know you want.'
Confused, Phil clung tightly to Ray. * * * 

Ray had been gone a long time. Worried that he might be lost, Ben searched
the camp one last time. Scanning the banks of the river, it struck him. He
glanced toward the group around the fire then at the other people that
moved about completing unknown tasks. Phil was missing as well. 

He approached Travis and asked if he had seen either Ray or Phil. Travis
nodded his head downstream and mentioned that he had seen Ray following
Phil up onto a shelf below them. He said it was one of her favorite spots
to stargaze. 

Ben quickly headed downstream to find his lost partner and Phil. As he
approached the incline to the shelf, he still could not see Ray or Phil.
He climbed the steep slope near the canyon wall. As he approached the top
and pulled himself up, a sight he would not have credited ten minutes
earlier greeted him. As his eyes adjusted to the changing shades of
darkness they widened in disbelief. The indistinct forms resolved
themselves into Ray and Phil locked in a passionate embrace. They were
oblivious to his approach. His nostrils flared with fury even as he
questioned his anger. He had no claim on Phil. Yet seeing her with
Ray...seeing her with any man angered him. 

"Excuse me!" Like stones, he threw the words at the couple. 

Phil and Ray jumped apart, guilty looks on their faces. Ben glared at
them, hands on hips, danger signs flashing in his eyes. 

Phil moistened her lips with her tongue. "Ben! What are you..." 

"Benny! We were just..." 

"I can see what you were just doing." He watched his friends share another
guilty look and it angered him even more. 

Phil's hackles rose at the challenge in his voice. Just who the hell did
he think he was? So...he wanted anger? She could give him anger. "What are
you doing here, Fraser? Are you following me...us? Just what gives you
that right?" Facing Ben, she spat out the words contemptuously. 

Ben drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. He had not wanted this,
but it looked like there was no escaping the inevitability of this
encounter. "If you don't mind Ray, Phil and I need to talk."  

Ray glanced at Phil noting her stance; he didn't need to see the daggers
in her eyes. "Do you want me to stay?" he softly asked. 

She shook her head and, in a voice edged with steel, said, "I'm fine, Ray.
Ben's right, I think we do need to have a private talk."  

Ray glanced back and forth between his two friends then nodded his head in
understanding. Grasping her by the shoulders, he lowered his voice and
said, "I'll be waiting for you down by the river, okay?" 

Phil clenched her lips then bobbed her head. "I'll see you there, Ray."
With a glance toward his partner, Ray started back to the camp.  

"Just what the hell was that all about?" she sputtered, bristling with
indignation. 

"You tell me! You both disappear and then I find you two locked in an
embrace that would shame Sunny Barkley!" Ben's voice was equally harsh. 

"Sunny Barkley? You mean the hooker who was in the news last year? The one
connected to Senator Johnstone?" 

"Yes, that's the woman." 

"You're comparing me to that woman? Benton Fraser, I've...I...I..." She
clenched her hand, so furious she could barely speak. 

Ben saw the action and pulled her into his arms preventing her from
injuring her hand further. He held her until she stopped squirming. Only
then did her release her. She stepped back and glared at him, breathing
heavily.  

"I'm not comparing you to her, I just said that your actions were not..." 

"Not what?" The quiet tone in her voice told Ben just how angry she was. 

Holding his hands up in a futile attempt to divert her anger, he lowered
his voice and spoke, "Your actions were not proper. You don't even know
Ray, and yet, here you two are acting like...like long-lost lovers." 

"And why not? I like Ray and I find him very attractive. And the feeling
is mutual." She used her finger in his chest to accent each point. 

Ben stumbled back a step. "Phil, you just met Ray. How can you be
attracted to someone you've just met?" 

Phil stared incredulously at him then turned away. She crossed her arms
and hugged herself. Glancing at him over her shoulder, she hardened her
heart by erecting barriers of anger. "I fell in love with you the moment I
laid eyes on you. Why can't I do the same with Ray? And what right do you
have to ask me that? Just look at what you did--a couple of days in a
blizzard with a murdering thief and you..." she couldn't stop the words
that spilled forth, "...you threw my love away like a piece of garbage.
Don't go telling me who I can or cannot fall in love with. You don't have
that right!" 

Suddenly weak and vulnerable in the face of her anger, Ben stared at her
rigid back then moved to stand behind her. Everything she said was true.
What right did he have to question her choices? "I'm sorry, Phil. I
thought we had talked through that..." 

She whirled to stare at him. "Well, we haven't! That's one of those
circumstances that we're going to have to discuss." 

Resignedly his shoulders slumped. He placed his hands on her shoulders and
tilted her chin up. "Understood." He took a step back and raked his
fingers through his hair. When he spoke again his voice was calmer. "I am
sorry about blowing up over seeing you and Ray together. I...I don't know
what came over me! I acted like..." 

"You acted like you were jealous." She spun on her heels and hurried
toward the edge of the shelf in the direction Ray had gone. 

Had he acted like he was jealous? He knew the answer before he even formed
the question. He couldn't help it. He still cared for her and he was
jealous of anyone who got close to her. That thought surprised him. He had
not thought himself to be the sort of man to be consumed by jealousy yet
here he was seething inside with emotions that threatened to overwhelm
him.  

Clenching his teeth, he breathed deeply then called to Phil, "Phil! Wait a
minute, please." She slowed, then stopped, and waited while he came up to
her. He spoke, his tone apologetic, "I'm sorry, Phil. I don't know what
came over me. I thought we had come to some sort of understanding. Didn't
we?" 

She licked her lower lip, quelling her anger. "I told you at the beginning
of this trip that I was involved with another man. I thought you
understood that." 

"I did. But I thought...after yesterday...darn, I don't know what I
thought, Phil." He ran a hand through his hair once more. "I guess I
thought that that had changed." His head slowly sank until his chin rested
on his chest. In a voice that had lost all of its fire, he murmured, "I
guess it would have been better for everyone if I had run when I first
found out you were going to lead this trip." 

The crooked smile pulled at the corners of her mouth as she glared at him.
"You? Run? I can't believe that Constable Benton Fraser, RCMP, could, much
less would, want to turn tail and run." The humor of the situation help
draw away the anger she felt. 

Ben nodded his head. "Nevertheless, it's true. I even contemplated
stealing a vehicle just to get away before you arrived." 

Phil laughed with delayed reaction to her anger. "You? You actually
thought about committing 'grand theft auto' just to get away from me? You
have no idea just how much better that makes me feel." Unable to stop, she
continued laughing. She watched as a smile spread on his face until he was
grinning, too. "That's better. I'm sorry, Ben, I said a few things I
didn't really mean." 

"Apology accepted, although it's not necessary. I guess the shock of
seeing you...of seeing you with Ray has affected me as well. I honestly
never thought I would ever see you again--ever get a second chance." The
thumb raked across the eyebrow. 

The smile faded from her face. "And I thought I would never see you again
either." Ben watched as look of longing settled in her eyes. She
swallowed, "Ben..." 

"What is it, Phil?" The tone of her voice tied his stomach into a knot. 

She drew in a deep breath. "Would you..." She stopped when she realized
what she wanted. Thanking the darkness for covering the red that stained
her cheeks, she turned away from him. 

Softly, he asked, "Would I what, Phil?" He watched Phil's back; watched
each breath she took; watched her turn again to face him. When she spoke,
he listened to her soft voice intently.  

"Would you hold me like you used to, kiss me like you used to, and tell me
how much you love me like you used to?" She had no idea how sensuous she
sounded to him. 

His mouth dropped open. Surely he'd misunderstood her. She couldn't have
asked what he thought he'd heard. The request hung between them. In the
faint starlight, he could see the unshed tears in her eyes in her upturned
face. Groaning, he pulled her to him and molded his body to hers. He
hungrily plundered her mouth with his kisses and refamiliarized his hands
with the contours of her body. The old familiar flames of desire burned
inside him.  

Phil clutched at him and returned his kisses with a matching ardor. Years
of loneliness melted away and they clung to each other in desperation but
reality soon intruded and Phil drew away from his embrace. She stared into
his face knowing that his eyes would have darkened to a dark storm-sea
blue and smiled tremulously at him. Returning to his arms, she snuggled
closer and leaned against the rock hard strength of his body. It had been
so long since she had done this. She listened to his racing heartbeat
inexplicably calmed by the thud-thud beneath her ear. She felt his hands
moving in gentle circles on her back. She felt the slight movement caused
by the soft chuckle that fell on her ear. 

"We had some good times, didn't we, Phil?" 

"Some of the best. But that was long ago." Her husky voice only emphasized
the sadness and loneliness. 

He continued to hold her, content just to feel her familiar presence in
his arms. "What about Ray?" he asked. 

"What about him?" she counter queried. 

"Are you interested in him?" It was hard to keep the jealousy out of his
voice or the fear that she might love another. 

"Not romantically. I know his heart belongs to someone else." 

"Casey Sinclair?" He asked as the kernel of fear slowly eased. He felt her
nod her head. "I thought so but he doesn't talk about her anymore. In
fact, he said that that relationship was over." 

"That doesn't mean he doesn't think about her." 

"I know the feeling, Phil," he whispered against her hair. "What about
Martin?" He held his breath as he waited for Phil's answer. 

Yes, what about Martin? In the headiness of the moment she had forgotten
Martin. Phil pulled away from Ben, knowing that she had revealed perhaps
too much to him. Trying to regain her perspective and distance her
feelings once more, she spoke, her voice quavering with emotion. "Why? Do
you begrudge me a chance for happiness?" 

"No, Phil, I don't. I just don't want you jumping into something you're
not ready for." He pulled her to him again. "And...before you go jumping
into a new relationship with a new friend, could you explore the
possibility of jumping into an old relationship with an old friend?" 

Phil closed her eyes. "T, I don't want to be hurt by you again." She
buried her face in his shirt. "Once was enough." 

She had called him 'T'. A feeling of warmth filled him. Ben brought his
hands up and threaded them through her hair, the silky strands caressing
his fingers. "Phil, I made a mistake 12 years ago. I hurt you and I hurt
myself. Can you forgive me for what I did to you, to us?" 

"Ben, I forgave you a long time ago." She thought of Lindy. "But, there
are things that happened after you left me. Things that we need to
discuss." Memories threatened to rob her of her composure. "Things that we
cannot discuss here--not during this trip." Shaking loose from his
embrace, she put a distance of several feet between them. "After this trip
is done, we can talk about everything. Maybe this is our second chance.
Maybe we can find what we both lost. 

Maybe..." But not right now. 

Phil stared at the man she had never stopped loving, then turned and slid
down the incline. At the bottom she looked back up to see Ben silhouetted
against the faint glow of the Milky Way. She turned and ran toward the
river. She didn't stop until she saw Ray waiting for her. 

He took one look at her and gathered her into his arms. "I take it you and
Benny had that talk that you've been avoiding?" 

Phil nodded, straightened, and moved away from Ray. Why couldn't she find
someone to replace Ben in her heart? Why not Martin? She glanced at Ray
and asked him point-blank, "Why is it that the moment I finally meet
someone who could make me forget Ben, he's here to make sure I don't?" 

Ray smiled knowingly. "That's probably because, deep in your heart, you
still love him. Am I right?" 

Phil shook her head before running her fingers through her short hair. "I
don't know, Ray. How could I still love him after what he did to me? After
what happened? And even if I did, I could never trust him again. How can I
love someone I can't trust?" 

Ray gently pulled her into his arms again. He cradled her head as she laid
it against his shoulder. "I trust him, Phil. That's all I need to know
about him. He's my best friend. He needs someone like you in his life." 

Phil whispered, "I thought you were interested in getting to know me
better. Now here you are trying to palm me off on Ben. What happened?" 

"Phil, you and I both know that we could have a wonderful relationship.
But, and that's a mighty big but, Benny would always be there in the
background. If there is to be anything between us, you'd have to get over
him completely and I'd have to get over Casey."  

"It's been twelve years, Ray, and in all that time I haven't been able to
do that." 

"That's what I thought." He smiled down at her. "Do you think you're going
to do that by the time this trip is over?" Shaking his head, he said, "I
don't think so, Phil." 

Phil sighed deeply letting all her frustrations flow with her breath.
"What do you suggest, Mr. Detective Vecchio?" 

Ray thought of what he had pieced together of the relationship between Ben
and Phil. If she could make Ben happy, make him forget Victoria...well, it
was all to evident to him that Phil still cared for Ben. They just needed
to work through their differences. Yeah--Ben and Phil--it just 

felt right. Just like Ray and Casey felt right. 

"What do I suggest? I think you and Benny should spend more time together
and see if you can rescue what you once had. Benny needs someone like you
and you still love him. Don't deny it..." He could feel her shaking head.
"Phil, you need to look into your heart and come to terms with what you
find there. If you can honestly say to me that you do not love him, and
will never love him, then maybe..." 

Phil stepped away from him. "Thanks, Ray. You're not the first to tell me
that very same thing." She extended her hand. "Can we still be friends?" 

"Of course we can?" Ray took her hand and instead of shaking it, brought
it to his lips and placed a kiss on her palm. 

"What if I find I still love Ben? Can we be friends then?" 

"Especially then." He smiled at her confusion. "Benny's my best friend. If
you can make him happy, I will love you forever." 

"Thanks, Ray. You don't know how much that means to me." She withdrew her
hand from his, turned, and started away from him. She took a couple of
steps then turned back to face Ray. 

"What is it, Phil?" 

Phil bit her lips before answering, "I've been debating whether or not to
tell you something. It's selfish of me, but I wanted to see how this trip
went before I told you where I lived." 

"I've noticed how you avoided letting anyone know where you were from.
Even the Hunters refused to tell. What did you do, warn them not to
discuss your private life?" 

"Something to that effect. It's a standard policy that we don't divulge
private information about each other. I also told them that I didn't want
any more complications in my life." 

Ray closed the distance between them. Sliding his hands into the pockets
of his shorts, he rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet. "I can
understand that. Now are you going to tell me where you live?"	

"Only if you promise not to tell Ben. I'll tell him when I think the time
is right. Okay?" 

Ray searched her face looking for clues to what was going on in her mind.
He saw only determination and wariness. "Okay. I won't tell Benny anything
as long as it doesn't compromise my friendship with him." 

Phil nodded her head shortly. "That's fair enough." She ran her hands
through her hair then buried her face in her hands. Moments passed before,
in barely more than a whisper, she said, "Do you remember me kidding you
about not being able to see many stars in Chicago?" 

Ray nodded, puzzled. What did the air quality in Chicago have to do with
anything? 

Phil sucked in a deep breath and slowly expelled it before uttering, "I
should know, Ray. I live in Chicago, too." 

Ray's eyes widened. "What?!? You live in Chicago?" 

Phil smiled ruefully and nodded. "For the past seven years. In fact my
apartment is about three blocks from the Canadian Consulate. I can't tell
you the number of times I walked past that building without knowing Ben
was there..." her voiced trailed off. "I only found out that he was in
Chicago about a month ago."  

Ray struggled to control his own mirth. All those times when Benny thought
he had seen that mysterious woman from his past--could he have actually
seen Phil? And here he was on a 

trip that was supposed to help him get his head on straight. The humor of
the situation was overpowering. He looked at Phil, saw the expression on
her face, and decided against telling her about Ben's obsession with the
'mystery woman.' It was something they could work out together. 

Yes, this field trip had definitely been worth the effort. What an
experience it had been--for all three of them. Maybe Phil was the one who
could finally erase the shadow of Victoria from Ben's life. Heaven knows
he needed it. Victoria had caused too much pain in too many lives. 

Maybe Phil was the opiate for so much pain. He gathered her into his arms
and hugged her deeply. 

Yeah, maybe she was the one to bring a little warmth and love into Ben's
life. He sure hoped so. Sadly he recalled his lonely state knowing that
the woman he wanted waited for him in Montana. 'Maybe, I'll give her a
call...' he thought. * * * 

Journal entry: 11 September 1997  

Travis asked me today if I'd be interested in becoming a professional
river runner. I admit there is great attraction in what he offers, but I
cannot accept. I am first and foremost a Royal Canadian Mounted Policeman.
I have always wanted to be one and, I guess, I'll die one. Just like my
father.  

There are only two more days left to this trip. I must make my move before
it's over. I must let Phil know how I truly feel. I cannot let her leave
without her knowing that I love her. I dread telling her, though. I know
now that I cannot have her in my life as just a friend. I want her love
but I don't know how she feels. Occasionally I get a hint of something
that might be love from her but I am never sure. Is she just teasing me? I
hope not. What does she really feel for this other man in her life?  

I held her tonight and kissed her like I have wanted to do since this trip
started. I was surprised by her request for it. I thought she wanted to
avoid anything that personal. Did she want to compare my passion with the
passion she had just experienced with Ray? I hope not. 

How could she ask me to kiss her if she truly loved Martin? That she loves
him eats at me like a cancerous growth. I am jealous of Martin. I am
jealous that Phil enjoys spending time with him. I am jealous that Martin
can kiss her whenever he wants. I am jealous of Martin. 

Dante in his 'Divine Comedy' wrote "Love, which is quickly kindled in the
gentle heart, seized this man for the fair form that was taken from me,
and the manner still hurts me. Love, which absolves no beloved one from
loving, seized me so strongly with his charm that, as thou seest, it does
not leave me yet." 

Love for Phil seizes me and it hurts to see her reject me. I can
understand why she does it, but that doesn't lessen the hurt. I am
surprised at the depths of my feelings. How can I possibly want to inflict
this kind of pain on myself again? Maybe what I'm feeling is an echo of
what I once felt. 

If I can't have Phil...I don't know what I will do. I must make it plain
to her what I want--no inuendos, no distractions, no falsehoods...only
truth, only bare facts. I want her back in my life. I only hope she feels
the same. I don't want just her friendship, though. I don't think I could
handle that. It has to be all or nothing. But, I'm afraid that it might be
nothing. Have I hurt her past the point where she can forgive me? Please,
God, I hope not.   

   

To be continued (?) 

***Excerpted from 'First Through the Grand Canyon' by Major John Wesley
Powell 

Copyright April 1997 by Cassandra Hope 

Comments are welcome at baktrak@earthlink.net 

  

Second Chances (Book 3 of the Ben & Phil Saga)	On a Collision
Course--Redux Second Chances A Cop, a Mountie, and a Dory Canyon Interlude
by Carol Trendall Rhyme of a Not-so-Ancient Mariner Down the Valley of the
Shadow The Heart Remembers You Call This Lucky? Ghost of a Chance The Soul
of a Friend 'Spuds' McKenzie A Moment of Paradise Nemesis By Day and Night