How Can I Show You How Much I Love You?    How Can I Show You How Much
I Love You? by Innusiq

 Author's disclaimer: None of the characters are mine and neither is the
greeting card.

 Author's notes: This is the third story I've written revolving around a
greeting card. The first being, A Blind Date with Cupid and the second,
Happy Birthday Ray. It is not required to read the first two before this
one for this is not a series but if ya haven't read them, I recommend
doing so. 

As always, comments are welcomed.

  

 How Can I Show You How Much I Love You? by: Jenny Hill 

 She hadn't planned on following him or even spying on him in the first
place. It wasn't in her nature to do such a thing. She wasn't a stalker or
even the stalker type but when she saw him in the local card shop one day
while she was at the mall running errands for their mother, her curiosity
was peeked. It's not like him being in a card shop was foreign, he was the
king of greeting cards. Never did a holiday or birthday pass that he
didn't give someone a card but there was no holiday that she could think
of coming soon and to boot, he was perusing the "Love" card section. She
couldn't help herself but to follow. 

 The idea that her brother had a secret he was keeping from his family and
that secret being a romance shocked her. Ray was the type of person who
flaunted his romances in the noses of everyone he came in contact with and
if you were lacking in such a relationship yourself, he acted worse. He
was never rude about it, he just couldn't keep quiet and he talked about
his love interests constantly. He was that way when he dated Irene in high
school no matter how short-lived their relationship had been and when he
started dated Angie, it was the same way. They could never get him to shut
up about her or what they did or what they were going to do. Even when he
was pursuing the district attorney Louise St. Laurant, a day didn't pass
when they didn't hear about her. Now, this was a totally opposite reaction
to being in love for Ray. Not only was he not bragging to kingdom come but
they didn't even know there was anyone he was interested in, in that way. 

 Maria saw her brother smile radiantly as he found "the" card and turned
to head towards the store register. She could tell he was happy, very
happy if not happier than she had ever seen him before and that fact made
it easy for her to forgive him for hiding this secret but it wouldn't keep
her from figuring out whom he was seeing. Their mother would never let her
hear the end of it if she didn't find out whom this mystery woman was that
Ray was dating. This person would need their mother's approval if this
relationship was heading towards the matrimonial state. Maria watched as
Ray exited the card shop and she continued to follow him at a distance. 

 

 It was their one-year anniversary and he wanted it to be special. Special
meant he needed to find the perfect card whether it was serious, funny or
just plain sappy. Unfortunately for Ray, the greeting card industry seemed
to believe all anniversaries were celebrated by heterosexual couples so he
was forced to search through the "Love" section of the card store in which
he would make up his own anniversary card. 

 It may have been their one-year anniversary but they might as well have
been celebrating their fiftieth for it felt like they had been together
forever. Their relationship began three years ago with them being perfect
strangers meeting to solve a murder case. Neither of them could have known
at that moment in time the results of that one meeting. They became
partners after that which soon turned into a friendship. They were best
friends and there was no denying the bond between them that would
eventually lead them to becoming lovers. 

 Ray smiled at that point as he picked up his tenth card and it was "the"
perfect card. After grabbing the card and its accompanying envelope, Ray
headed for the check out. He had an eerie feeling of being watched but he
couldn't see anyone else in the store that he knew so he shrugged the
feeling aside. Ray chocked it up to him being paranoid over people finding
out about this stage of his and Fraser's relationship. His mother would
definitely have a coronary. Frannie, well he tried not to think about her
reaction too much because what ever it would be was not going to be good
and probably would involve his own dismemberment. Maria - he didn't know
exactly how his older sister would respond to the knowledge of his
relationship with Fraser but to him, next to his mother, her opinion was
most important. She was his eldest living sibling and he respected her
status in the family. 

 "Here's your change sir and have a nice day," the teenage store clerk
said as she handed Ray change and his bagged card. 

 "Thank you kindly Amy," Ray said noticing her nametag. "You too." 

 

 Maria followed Ray through the rest of the mall but no more clues were to
be found as to whom this mystery woman was. After leaving the card shop,
Ray headed towards all the men's clothing stores spending about a
half-hour in each. "As if he needed any more clothing," Maria thought to
herself. She stayed outside the stores and out of view, waiting for him. 

 After Ray was finished with his shopping he headed straight for the
parking lot. Unfortunately for Maria, he had parked his precious Riv on
the opposite side of the mall than her own vehicle so her spying for the
day was at an end. She watched Ray exit the mall then turned to head
towards the exit leading to her parked car. 

 What next? Where did she go from here? The wheels in her head began
turning as she started concocting a plan to gain any information she could
about Ray and his mystery woman. Seeing today was Ray's day off, her first
stop would be the precinct. Besides the Mountie, Elaine was his next
closest friend and if anyone knew anything, Maria was sure she would,
seeing she worked on a daily basis with her brother. 

 "Hi Elaine," Maria said as she approached the Civilian Aide's desk. 

 Elaine looked up, startled to see Ray's sister there. "Hi Maria, Ray
isn't here today. It's his day off." 

 Maria nodded her head. "Yes, I know, I came here to talk to you." Elaine
gestured to the seat next to her desk unsure as to what Ray's sister would
need to discuss with her. "I need to ask you something about Ray." 

 "Is everything alright?" Elaine asked giving Maria her full attention. 

 "There's nothing wrong . . . I was just wondering if you knew . . . if .
. . is Ray seeing someone?" She finally blurted out. 

 Elaine was taken back by the question. There were times in her life when
she hated her job and this was one of them. It didn't have to do with the
job details themselves but more the friendship she shared with two of her
coworkers; okay, one of her coworkers and his unofficial partner. "What
are you asking me?" She was delaying. She knew very well what was meant by
Maria's words and she knew the answer to the question. 

 "I mean is Ray dating someone because I've noticed some things . . ." 

 "Like what?" 

 "Well, nothing major . . . I mean I saw him today at the mall and he
bought a card . . . a romance card but none of us even knew there was
someone he had an interest in let alone dating," Maria explained. 

 The reason no one knew was because no one was suppose to know, not yet at
least. "Listen Maria, don't you think this is a question you should be
asking Ray?" 

 "Well yes but I know if I ask him he won't tell me. He can be stubborn
like that ya know?" 

 Elaine had to laugh at that because she knew the detective too well.
Stubborn to the bone he was. She tried to talk him into telling his
family, if anyone, about his relationship with his partner but there's no
moving Ray when his mind was made up. "Yeah, I know." Elaine would go any
further. 

 The light bulb popped on in Maria's head. "You know, don't you?" She
accused. Elaine kept looking at Ray's sister not saying a word. "You do,
you know." 

 Elaine nodded her head. "Yes but I can't tell you." 

 "Why? I won't say anything I swear." There was pleading in her voice. 

 Elaine arched an eyebrow at the words she wouldn't believe even if Ray
had said them. It wasn't in the Vecchio's nature to keep quiet. "Maria, as
much as I would like to tell you, I promised Ray." 

 She was defeated but she had to ask a question that she already knew the
answer to. She just needed a second opinion, confirmation as to the state
of this relationship. "He's happy, isn't he?" 

 Elaine smiled as she replied, "Yes, very much." 

 

 When Maria finally made it home, her children were no where in sight and
neither was the rest of the family. "Hello?" She called out as she closed
the door behind her. "Is anyone home?" It was odd for her to be coming
home to an empty house with no children in sight. 

 "Hey sis," Ray greeted, coming out of the kitchen and immediately heading
up the stairs. 

 "Hey, where is everyone?" 

 Ray stopped and came back down the steps he had walked up. "Well, let's
see, Tony is at work, Frannie - who knows where Frannie is and Ma took the
kids to the park and after words I think she said something about
McDonalds - kids have been hounding her about those damn teeny beany
things again. Is there anyone I'm forgetting?" 

 "No," she replied as she watched Ray head back up the stairs. "What are
you doing?" 

 Ray stopped again but didn't come back down. "I'm going upstairs, if you
don't mind, to take a shower." 

 It was just after five in the evening. "Isn't it early for that?" 

 Ray shook his head. "Not if I'm goin' out." 

 Maria watched Ray climb the rest of the stairs and the wheels in her head
were turning once again. 

 

 Fifteen minutes later, Ray locked himself away in the bathroom leaving
his bedroom door wide open and inviting. Maria entered it without a second
thought. It's not like she didn't go in the room every day to deliver
laundry and the like but tonight she was feeling a little guilty. It
didn't stop her though. She was on a mission and she had little time to
weigh the consequences of being caught in the act. 

 The room didn't look any different than any other day. His bed was neatly
made and the clothes she had put on the bed earlier in the day had been
put away in their proper places. In the center of the bed was a gift bag
that had been tied shut with a bow. It wasn't just any card he was giving
to the person he loved but a card that marked a milestone in their
relationship. A month, half a year, or maybe even a year - the time span
didn't really matter. It was a special day and her brother, being the ever
Mr. Romantic, remembered. This person was a very lucky duck. 

 Maria turned to leave the room when it caught her eye. There, on his
dresser, next to his wallet and keys was the card and it wasn't sealed in
its envelope yet. It didn't take much deciding for her to choose to read
the card and it was a typical "Ray" card in her opinion. There was a
cherub in the upper left corner pushing a wheelbarrow overflowing with red
hearts and the card read: 

 How Can I Show You How Much I Love You? 

 I could write romantic poetry if I could think up rhymes. 

 Tattoo "I love you" on my butt about a million times. 

 I'd swim the deepest ocean (if I wasn't scared of sharks). 

 Carve our initials on a tree? What?! And vandalize our parks? 

 I'd climb the highest mountain if you'd drive me to Tibet. 

 Reenact our love with puppets? No. That's my dumbest idea yet! 

 Jeez, this is going badly - it's like my brain is stuck. 

 Just believe I love you - now let's go someplace and . . . . 

 ***the inside read*** 

 . . . cuddle. 

 See, I told you I had trouble with rhymes. 

 She had a hard time keeping herself from laughing. The card wasn't signed
yet but the sentiment warmed her heart. He wasn't in the "impressing"
stage of this relationship anymore but more the relaxed "be yourself"
stage. Maria put the card down and left the bedroom as she had found it,
still in the dark as to whom this mystery woman was. 

 About a half-hour later, Ray came bounding down the stairs with the
package in hand. It was just after six in the evening and the house was
still quiet. With no one else there, Maria was becoming antsy. She stopped
Ray before he could leave. "Where are you going, Ray?" 

 "Out." It was the only information he was willing to offer. 

 She wasn't going to let him off the hook that easily. "Out where?" 

 Ray turned to humor her. "What, are you Ma all of the sudden, you have to
know everything I do?" 

 "No but if she should ask, when will you be home?" 

 Ray smiled slyly as he walked over to his sister and kissed her cheek.
"Wouldn't you like to know." He left with out saying another word. 

 

 The restaurant was packed but there was a table for two waiting for them
upon their arrival. Her date pulled out the chair for her until she was
seated and gently pushed it in. He was polite and good looking but he
wasn't her Mountie. Just another guy she had to go out with to appease her
mother. "This is a nice place, don't you agree?" Mark, the son of one of
her mother's friends, asked as he seated himself. 

 Francesca nodded out of habit knowing it was the answer her date was
looking for. Her eyes began scanning the restaurant as he continued
talking about what, she couldn't even say because when she saw "him," Mark
didn't exist anymore. 

 "He" was seated on the other side of the restaurant and he wasn't alone.
She couldn't see who he was with from the angle where she was sitting but
whoever it was made him comfortable. She knew that because he looked more
at ease than she had ever seen him. Fraser was conversing with his company
and laughing. He was laughing. She had never seen him laugh like that
before. It was a beautiful thing to witness. There was a slight blush on
his face that would endear him to any woman's heart. The only time she had
seen him anywhere near that relaxed was in her brother's presence. Who
ever his date was, was a lucky woman. 

 "Frannie?" Mark called out for the third time. 

 Francesca turned her head towards her date and said, "Would you excuse
me?" She was up and walking away from the table before he could even
respond. She had to know whom Fraser was with. There was too much at
stake, her heart for one and her sanity for another. When she approached
his table, she breathed a sigh of relief. It was only Ray. 

 "Frannie?" Ray said as she approached the table. "What are you doing
here?" 

 "Oh nothing . . . I'm on a date . . . I mean . . . well, it's not a date
really . . . I mean, I really don't know the guy. He's just a guy Ma
promised her friend I would go out with . . . it's just dinner. We're here
for dinner," Francesca rambled her reply hoping Fraser wouldn't catch on
to the cover up and he didn't because he never did. 

 "You have a date Francesca?" Fraser questioned with a sound of relief. 

 "No, not a date, I'm here for dinner . . . with an acquaintance, that's
all." She had to make sure he understood her intentions with this other
man for there were none. 

 "Oh," Fraser replied at a loss for words in order to continue any type of
conversation. He wasn't comfortable with any interaction with Francesca
and it was becoming harder and harder to even try when her advances were
becoming more and more apparent. 

 "Yeah, just dinner . . . ya know, you and I could go out for dinner
sometime . . ." Francesca tried to suggest when she was interrupted. 

 "Frannie, why don't you leave the guy alone and go back to your 'date,'"
Ray said, making a suggestion of his own. 

 "Dinner! God, weren't you listening. I am not on a date." Francesca
turned and stormed off back to her date for the evening. 

 Fraser sat for a minute, watching his lover's sister walk back to her
table, then asked, "Ray, was that entirely necessary?" 

 "Benny, you don't know how necessary that was." Ray too watched his
sister's retreat and he couldn't help but feel sorry for her. When she
finds out about them, she will be devastated, he knew that for a fact,
which is one of the reasons he hadn't said anything to anyone in his
family. Ray turned to Fraser, tapping his arm. "You ready to go?" 

 Fraser nodded his head in reply. 

 

 Francesca slammed the door upon entering the house. She was still mad at
Ray for the scene at the restaurant. Now she had to think of what to do to
rectify her relationship with Fraser. She knew she shouldn't have given in
to her mother's request to go out on the date but there was no saying no
her mother "Never again," Francesca vowed out loud as she stomped up the
stairs and towards her bedroom. 

 Maria was exiting the bedroom of her youngest child when she caught sight
of her irate sister. "Frannie, what's the matter?" She asked following
Francesca into her bedroom. 

 "Our brother is the matter. Ya know, he can be a real jerk sometimes." 

 "Ray? I thought you were out on a date with Mark?" Maria questioned. 

 "Yes, okay, so I was on a date with Mark. I admit it. It was a date but
it doesn't mean we're exclusive, right? I mean, I just met the guy." She
was fed up with the night. "Augh!" Francesca exclaimed as she threw
herself on the bed. "I hate him." 

 Maria was having difficulty following what her baby sister was trying to
say. Francesca was making very little sense and Maria couldn't figure out
what Ray had to do with her date. "You hate who, Mark?" 

 "No, Ray. Aren't you even listening to me?" 

 Maria sat down next to her sister. "Frannie, why don't you start from the
beginning because you're not making a whole lot of sense." 

 Francesca inhaled and released her breath slowly. "Okay, so I'm at the
restaurant with Mark and we are just sitting down and I see him." 

 "You see who?" 

 "Fraser." A dreamy look crossed Francesca's face at the thought of him.
"He was at the restaurant. I could see him from across the room but not
who he was with. I was jealous. He looked so relaxed . . . so happy. I'm
not blind ya know? I know how he reacts to me when I'm around. So I was
jealous of who he was with." 

 "Frannie . . ." Maria was trying to sooth away the hurt she could see in
her sister's eyes. 

 "Don't patronize me. I went out with Mark so I could get over him. I had
pretty much decided there is no future for us but when I saw him . . . I
couldn't let him go." 

 Maria didn't like where this story was going. "What did you do Frannie?" 

 Francesca shrugged her shoulders. "Nothing . . . I excused myself and
went to see who he was with." 

 Maria gapped at her sister. "You didn't." 

 Francesca was nodding her head proudly. "Oh, yes I did but not to worry
sis, he was only with Ray." 

 "What?" 

 "Ray, you know, our brother - who I hate," Francesca said, reiterating
her current disgust with their brother. 

 "I heard you the first time but I don't believe it." Maria was shocked to
hear Ray was with Fraser and not his "mystery" woman as she had assumed. 

 "What's not to believe? He's always out with Fraser, which is why he
doesn't have a life. You ask him where he's been and the answer's always
the same, 'With Benny.'" The words Francesca said spoke more than the
plain truth. It was a truth only Maria could see and Francesca was
oblivious to it. 

 "He's always with Fraser," Maria repeated. 

 "Maria, are you okay?" Francesca asked, finally out of her mood and
worrying about someone other than herself. 

 "Yeah, I'm fine . . ." Maria trailed off her statement as she stood up
and began leaving her sister's room without an explanation. 

 "My brother and sister are both nuts." Francesca said rolling her eyes as
she got off her bed and began changing for the night. 

 

 He hated leaving. It was the worst part of the night or morning or
whatever time of day it was when he had to leave. What made it so hard
were the eyes that watched his every move as he dressed in preparation for
his departure. His lover watched but never complained. With a final
lingering kiss, Ray said, "I'll see you in a couple hours." And he was
gone. 

 The drive home was over before it started and it made it seem like the
day had never happened. Ray snuck into the darkened house and up to his
bedroom hoping to make it under the covers before his mother was any the
wiser. To date, he had never once been caught sneaking into the house but
there were days, when he wasn't paying attention to the time, that he cut
it close. Bedroom door closed, Ray breathed a sigh of relief knowing he
had made it once again and when he looked up to see the sun's rays just
peeking into the room, he met her eyes and gulped. 

 She had been waiting for him all night, ever since her conversation with
her sister earlier the night before and she still didn't know what she was
going to say. "Good morning Ray," Maria said from the window. 

 "Maria . . . what are you doing in here?" Ray asked frozen in his spot,
unable to move and nearly unable to breathe. 

 "Waiting for you." Maria crossed the room to where Ray was standing and
turned on his bedroom light. "Can we talk?" 

 Ray was being led to his bed where he and his big sister took a seat. Ray
sat staring at his hands clasped in his lap. He had never felt so guilty
in his life. "What do you wanna talk about?" 

 Maria reached out a hand to bring his eyes up to meet her own. She smiled
at her baby brother and said, "I don't know . . . life, love, happiness .
. ." Ray didn't say a word and his look told her he was scared. "Ray, why
do you feel like you have to sneak around your own family? Do you think so
little of us?" Ray shook his head. "Then why?" 

 Ray's silence spurred Maria to continue. "You know Ray, today Ma asked me
to run some errands for her and I saw you while I was out. I saw you in
the card shop, Ray." 

 "What, were you spying on me?" Ray accused. 

 "Ray, you know better than that," Maria scolded. "I was worried about
you, that is all. I accidentally ran into you and when I saw what section
of the card shop you were in . . . okay at that point I will admit I was
spying on you but it didn't start out that way. I care about you Ray.
You're my baby brother. If I don't look out for you, who will?" Maria was
cupping his face in her hands as she did so many times when they were kids
and he needed the reassurance. "You love him, don't you?" 

 Ray's eyes widen for a second then he gave in, nodding his head knowing
all too well not to deny anything to his sister. She knew him almost as
well as he knew himself 

 "And he loves you?" 

 "Yes," Ray replied solemnly, looking away. 

 "Then why do you sound so glum? You are happy, aren't you?" Maria
questioned not understanding why her brother sounded almost embarrassed
about his choice in life. 

 Ray made eye contact with his sister. "Yes, I am very happy. He makes me
happy but no one will understand." 

 "I understand," Maria said, receiving a small smile from her brother. "As
long as you are happy Ray, that is all I care about. Whether it is a woman
or a man, it doesn't matter. He's a good choice, if I might say so. A
choice even Frannie would approve of." 

 Ray rolled his eyes. "She will never approve of this." 

 "Don't be so judgmental Ray, she may surprise you . . . of course you may
have to give her a couple years to warm up to the idea . . ." 

 "Yeah, try a lifetime," Ray added his own take on what his little
sister's reaction would be. 

 "In her heart, she knows Fraser doesn't return the affection she has for
him but you can't blame a girl for trying now, can you?" 

 Ray shook his head. "She's reaching for her dream." 

 Maria nodded, agreeing with that sentiment. "So, you gonna tell Ma?" 

 Ray adamantly shook his head. "No." 

 "Ray . . ." 

 "Maria, I can't . . . not yet. We've been together for a year. It's been
one full year of happiness. I don't want to let go of that yet. Do you
know how long I have waited for someone like him, for a relationship like
this?" Ray questioned. 

 "You're entire life." 

 "Yeah . . . I'm just not ready to chuck it all away. I'm not ready for
the struggle that lays ahead for us when people start finding out, ya
know?" 

 Maria understood what he was saying. Although she had no experience of a
world not accepting her for her choice in a lover, she still knew that it
was definitely going to be a hard road for them to travel. "Okay Ray, I
just want you to know that I support you and when the time comes for you
to tell Ma and Frannie, I will do all I can to help them to understand." 

 This was too good to be true and he feared being pinched. He feared he
would wake up and find this conversation had just been a dream. But it
wasn't a dream. His sister knew about them and still loved them both,
accepted them with no questions asked. "Thank you Maria." 

 Maria stood up and gestured for her brother to do the same. "Come on,
give your big sister a hug." 

 Ray complied with her request, wrapping his arms around her and giving
her the biggest hug possible. "I love you so much Maria, thank you." 

 Maria returned the embrace and when she pulled away she said, "I love you
too, Ray. Now get in bed, before Ma wakes up." 

 

 Maria closed the bedroom door behind her and when she looked up, older,
caring and all knowing eyes greeted hers. Mrs. Vecchio smiled at her
daughter, nodding approvingly as she walked by and down the stairs to
begin her morning ritual of cooking breakfast for her family. Maria should
have figured that their mother already knew. She always knew any and
everything that had to do with her children. Maria shook her head in
bemusement as she headed to her bedroom where she hoped to at least get a
few hours of sleep before her own children woke up. 

 The End