Ben's Body Bear: Sweet Dreams      The Christmas Party  

  

  

 by Cheryl Ross  

  

 Rated G  

  

 Humour Poetry	

  

 All standard disclaimers apply.  

  The Christmas Party  

  

  

 Twas the night before Christmas  

 and all through the station  

 the cops were havin' a huge celebration.  

  

 Their holsters were slung  

 on their desks without care  

 and even Lt. Welsh had a jubilant air.  

  

 Elaine left her computer completely unmanned  

 as she searched for the Mountie  

 with mistletoe in her hand..  

  

 With Frannie in her mini-skirt  

 and Benton in his hat	

 she was trying to manoeuvre him into the back.  

  

 That glint in her eye	

 that tilt to her head	

 soon gave him to know	

 he had something to dread.  

  

 Much redder than holly  

 his cheeks they became  

 and he stuttered and stammered  

 and called out Ray's name.  

  

 When in through the doorway  

 who should appear  

 but Inspector Meg Thatcher  

 decked in red Mountie gear.  

  

 She wore an evil expression  

 and a mean icy glare  

 that told little Frannie  

 she'd better beware.  

  

 But tucked in Ben's pocket  

 was a card from Peoria  

 that read "Merry Christmas,  

 love and bullets... Victoria".  

  

 And Ray of course  

 was a right jolly sight  

 in reds and greens  

 and oranges so bright.  

  

 He was dressed in Armani  

 from his head to his shoe  

 and he looked like the cover  

 of December's GQ.  

  

 He'd had too much punch  

 and his eyes were all screwy  

 in a tragic mistake  

 he made a pass at Jack Huey.  

  

 When in came a call  

 Ray's Mom's on the phone  

 Christmas dinner is ready  

 You'd better get home.  

  

 So away to the Riv  

 they flew like a flash  

 Ray leaping in  

 hit his head on the dash.  

  

 More vile than a sailor's  

 his curse words they came  

 while Ben shook his head  

 and whispered, "For shame".  

  

 But I heard them exclaim  

 'ere they drove out of sight  

 "Thank you kindly to all  

 and to all a good night".  

  

 By Cheryl Ross  

  

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