Body     *"DO YOU STILL LOVE ME?"*	

  *By GILDA LILY*   

Rating: PG 

Pairing: Benny/Ray 

Category: Poetry 

Warning: Major Angst ("CALL OF THE WILD") 

Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, Alliance does, more's the pity. 

Comments can be sent to: jeanniemarie@sprintmail.com 

(c) April 4, 1999 

  It hurts.  

  You took 

Another bullet 

For me. 

Yet you can't seem to 

Welcome me back 

Into your life. 

Did you know 

That you never even 

Looked at me 

While we were 

In Welsh's office? 

I was staring at you 

Like a starving man, 

And you never glanced 

My way. 

Oh, Ray, 

What are you afraid of? 

Do you think that I've 

Fallen 

For the other Ray? 

I like him, 

Very much, 

But as a friend, 

A brother, 

But he's not 

My heart. 

*You* are my Ray. 

*Mine.* 

I've been in 

Purgatory 

For nine months, 

Waiting for your return, 

So that I could start 

Living again. 

And now... 

When I first saw you 

Across that hotel lobby, 

My mind didn't know you, 

But my body did. 

My pulse raced, 

And my heart beat 

Faster, 

As my legs propelled me 

Across a thousand lifetimes 

And up those stairs, 

In desperate haste. 

Part of me *knew* 

It was you. 

All I knew was 

That I couldn't lose you. 

And then the door opened, 

And you were there, 

And I smiled 

With all my heart. 

And later, 

When you called me 

'Benny', 

My heart overflowed 

With joy. 

But you seemed 

Distant 

After that. 

Have you grown tired 

Of me? 

Did you learn 

That you could live 

Without me? 

Oh, Ray, 

When I saw you 

Run toward Muldoon, 

My blood ran cold. 

He fired, 

And you dropped. 

My protector... 

Again. 

I love you so much 

My heart aches. 

I want to feel 

Your arms 

Around me, 

Hear your sweet 

Laughter 

In my ear, 

Your gentle touch 

On my skin. 

Do you still love me? 

Why can't you say it?