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Pain in the Arse
BY: Kleio*** The roar of the drunken sailors
and the paid giggle of the women
swarming around them were getting too much for Will Turner. He had emptied far too many pints and fought off far too many ladies of the night - all he wanted was to find the door out of this hellhole some insisted on calling a tavern, and stumble back to the HMS Interceptor and sleep till hangover. What this drunken orgy had to do with hiring a crew and sailing after Barbossa and darling Elizabeth, Will hadn't the foggiest. Apparently this was how crews were recruited in the world of the pirates: drinking, singing, and probably later on shagging, in a stuffy and smelly tavern in Tortuga. "Jack, I think I'll be heading back now," Will tried to yell over the table full of poorly but merrily singing pirates. No answer, not even a nod. Captain Jack Sparrow was too busy burying his face into the bosom of a beautiful brunette and Will didn't have the heart nor the nerve to pull him away from his sweet hideaway. Yet another one to be added to the long line of women Jack was practically begging to get a slap from, as evidenced earlier that day when meeting the lovely Scarlet and the lovely... whomever. "Aren't there any rooms in this place?" Will murmured and turned his back on the obscene sight. After fighting his way through wine, song and women, Will found himself standing in the alley, breathing in the fresh air to slow down the rapidly spinning world around him. He shouldn't have accepted all those drinks, but Jack had appeared to be on a generous mood, or perhaps it was just his nature. Either way, the pints had been carried before him in a steady stream and he had felt obliged to dispose of them. Somehow Will found it utterly impossible to say 'no' to Jack. There was something in the man's look that made him uneasy - and alarmingly ready to carry out any orders the pirate captain might give. "He's a witch, that captain," Will muttered as he stumbled along the way, presumably towards the docks. "He'll just look at you and smile, he'll smile that golden smile of his, and WHAM! you're under his spell, and you can't think straight, and he will have you do whatever he wants you to do, and you can't do a damn thing about it, not a damn thing..." Will stopped at a corner and tried to remember which way they had come. The town of Tortuga had been a muddle of streets and houses in the daylight, but at night it looked like a giant labyrinth where all the ways seemed equally right and wrong. "Oh, well, can't be helped," Will stated resignedly and picked randomly one of the streets opening before him. "Who cares where I end up? He probably won't even notice I'm gone, too busy with his 'bonnie lass'. Well, *my* 'bonnie lass' has been kidnapped by a mad pirate and all I can do is watch him get drunk and have his little fun with that, that... that whore! He'll give her that look, that smile, and he'll have his fun and won't even notice that I'm not there, and why would he? I'm nothing! Although, it was I that freed him from prison, and if it weren't for me he'd be hanging from his neck, but nooo," Will drawled to exaggerate his point. Then, remembering what he had overheard in the tavern, when Sparrow and Gibbs had discussed the true nature of this journey, he continued, "He makes it seem like we're really here to get him his ship back, like it's *his* trip, when really-really we're here because *I* want him... no, because I need him..." Will's drunken monologue came to a sudden end. "Well, well, what have we 'ere?" Will could barely make out the tall and heavy man behind the voice. He was about to inquire the way to the docks when he noticed two more men, likewise disturbingly strongly built, standing beside him. "Let's see wha' ye got there, mate," one of the men said and before he realised it, Will's sword had been taken from him. "Look here... gentlemen," Will started apologetically as another was going through his pockets. "I don't have much money on me..." "Ye got that one right!" said the man inspecting his findings. "Ain't worth much this one, is 'e." The drunken Will was soon knocked over and left lying on the ground, prepared to take in the kicks. He knew he would be no match for these men in his highly intoxicated state and, moreover, without his precious sword, so he resigned to try and minimize the damage ahead by curling up to protect his vital organs. Silently he cursed himself for leaving the tavern alone, and Jack for letting him leave, and himself for coming to Tortuga, and Jack for bringing him there, and himself for getting Jack involved in Elizabeth's rescue in the first place, and Jack for meddling in affairs that need not have concerned him in the least, and, in that short while when he lay on the ground, waiting to be battered, Will cursed Jack for every conceivable thing gone wrong in his entire life. "Maybe we oughta 'ave us some fun with 'im, eh lads?" Will took a deep breath and tightened his muscles, but the kick never came. Instead, he was rolled onto his stomach and to his ultimate surprise, he could feel the cool night air on his behind. Through his drunken haze the true meaning of the word 'fun' began to dawn upon him and in panic he started kicking and swinging his fists ferociously, trying to hit anything he could possibly reach. "No-no-no-no-no!" he screamed from the top of his lungs, but the voice was soon silenced as his face was pushed to the ground and his mouth filled with dirt. The man behind him was forcing himself on Will, while the other two grabbed his hands and pinned him down. "Shut up, ye bitch!" the man hissed between his teeth and Will sensed his warm skin touching his bare buttocks. He gathered his strength for one final push to free himself, but to no avail. He closed his eyes and prepared for the worst. "I fear I see no bitches here but three dogs," came the slightly stammering but overly polite voice from behind them. "Any chance you fellows would cease to molest me companion?" The man lying on top of Will jumped to his feet and the other two followed soon after, allowing Will to turn around and confirm what he had heard. "An' who the 'ell be ye, then?" "Captain Jack Sparrow," Jack announced himself with a due bow. "But you, my fine gentlemen, will remember me as the one who took your sorry little lives!" All Will could see were four pairs of legs stumping back and forth around him and four blades glimmering in the moonlight. He hurried to pull his breeches up to join the fight, but when he finally managed to get to his feet, he found Jack standing next to two men lying on the ground with dark stains on their shirts. The sound of footsteps disappearing into the distance accounted for the third man. "There's always got to be that one that got away," Jack said to himself bitterly, and then, turning to Will: "You all right, lad?" "Yes, I think so," Will muttered. "Better be getting you to your bunk, luv. Had quite a scare there." "I was just going back to the ship when they..." "Let us not think about it," Jack said to calm the young man down. Will was shaking uncontrollably and the paleness of his face was turning towards green. "It's a long walk to the docks. You appear to have taken the scenery route here, mate." "Sorry, I couldn't remember..." Will was cut off by a sudden wave of sickness and falling to his knees he threw up right in front of Jack. "I don't think I can make it..." "Alrighty then," Jack said matter-of-factly and pulled Will back up. "Back to the tavern it is." Half-carrying, half-dragging, Jack escorted Will through the maze of streets and alleys, till finally Will found himself standing once more in the same tavern, which now appeared to be even stuffier and smellier than before. After a quick word with the owner, Jack returned with a key and pushed Will up the stairs and into a small and dark room, the furniture of which consisted of a narrow bed with dirty linen, and what seemed to have once been a chair, but was now simply a wooden plank on three legs. "Sleep it off," Jack said, grabbing Will's sword and placing it on the chair, and hurled the man onto the bed. "I'll have you picked up in the morn." "No, don't!" "If you wish to stay here longer," Jack replied, taking a look around the room, "I'd say you have a twisted notion of taste." "No, I don't want to be alone." Will was swallowing back the nausea. He was sure that if he threw up again, Jack would be gone in a flash. "Please." A complacent smile crept onto Jack's face. "I know where I'm wanted," he said, already removing his sword and pistol and piling them on the chair. Finally covering the whole lot with his beloved hat, the still smirking man gave Will a little shove in order to make room for himself. "And I'm always happy to oblige." *** Will nodded off almost immediately, but Jack sat leaning against the wall for a good while, smoking his pipe, deep in his thoughts. Will slept peacefully beside him, undisturbed by the music and laughter coming from downstairs. The cool night air streamed in through the window, which had only one of its shutters still in place, though broken enough to do any actual 'shutting'. Just as Jack was about retire after finishing his pipe, Will's body started twitching and turning. "No!" Will screamed suddenly and jumped out of the bed. "Oy, easy now," Jack said to calm down the highly agitated man. Trying to bring him back to reality, he asked, "Bit of a bad dream?" "I was back there, right back there, and they wouldn't stop," Will muttered as he sat down on the bed. "I couldn't make them stop, I couldn't!" "Nothing you could have done, luv." Jack laid back and pushed his hand behind his head. "I say, three against one, no fair." "You don't understand. They took my sword! No one had ever taken my sword." "Apart from yours truly," Jack said smugly. "You didn't take my sword!" Will exclaimed. "You pulled out a pistol - that was cheating!" "Must you cling to every minor detail..." "I felt so helpless. I hated it," Will continued, ignoring Jack's remarks. "And then when they tried to..." "Have their little fun?" Jack helped. "I can't believe they wanted to... to do that," Will said in disbelief. "Why on earth would they want to do that?" "We come in all capes and guises." "Shapes and sizes," Will corrected absent-mindedly. "You sure?" "I think so." "Makes sense." "Either way." "True." Will laid himself down on his back in the narrow space Jack had been kind enough to leave free for him. Looking at the ceiling he kept wondering about the shapes and sizes. He had just encountered three shapes, and of considerable size, for that matter, but was unable to make out what that shape actually was. These were not the shapes commonly known in the world of the blacksmiths'. "It's over and done with. Time to go bye-bye." Jack yawned and turned onto his side, his back to the pondering Will. But Will couldn't stay silent for long. The dream had been vivid enough to keep his eyes open till morning. And his curiosity was more than willing to follow the fate of the cat. "But why?" he asked, not letting Jack to fall asleep just yet. "They could have just gotten themselves a girl from any of the taverns." "Maybe they're the type that don't go for the lasses," Jack replied briefly. "You mean..." Will stopped, not knowing what word to use. "You mean they're... sodomites?" "Not the most imaginative name I've known them to be called, but yes. And now sleep. Big day of pillage and plunder ahead." Will laid still for a good five minutes. The uneasy feeling of wanting simultaneously to forget all about what had luckily never happened, yet also to learn more about it, wouldn't leave him in peace. As much as he loathed those men that had attacked him, there were some truly strange and unwanted thoughts lingering in his aching head which he simply could not quite comprehend, let alone expel. "But why do they do it? Does someone actually *want* to do it? Doesn't it hurt? It has to hurt." "It depends," Jack murmured sleepily. "On what?" "What you mean by 'hurt', luv." "Pain?" Will said, stating the obvious. "Aye, but there be all kinds of pains. That be the good kinda pain. To that kinda people. Savvy?" Nearly a minute's awkward silence. "And how would you know, Jack?" Will was certain he heard Jack gasp, and had he been able to see the look on the pirate's face, his eyes would have confirmed that a nerve had indeed been touched. "I'm Captain Jack Sparrow," Jack answered, the familiar grin audible in his voice. "I know all there is to know." "You mean, it's a pirate thing?" "A woman on board is bad luck." "So-o?" "Men be on board for weeks. Sleep." Will turned his back to Jack and tried to close his eyes, but although the drink pulled him into sleep, his mind refused to give in just yet. "So, have you done it?" he ventured to ask. "With a man, I mean." "Sleep. Now. You may consider that an order." The grin was gone and instead Jack's voice sounded harsh and cold. But Will had gone too far to give up now. "Did it hurt? Was your... ehm... behind... I mean, was it painful?" "Not more than a certain pain in the arse is being right now!" Jack snapped and turned onto his back, burying his face in his hands and hissing through: "Why won't you let me close me eyes and sleep?!" "I'm just curious, that's all." "So, the lad wants to know what it's like, eh?" Jack mumbled to himself as he rubbed his face. "Won't let me sleep till I tell him a bloody bedtime story? Well, why tell..." With one swift move Jack flung himself around and against Will's back, wrapping his arms and legs around the young man's body and finally covering the gasping mouth with his hand. "...when I can show it to you meself!" Will tried to struggle but in vain. He was utterly helpless. His head was hanging partly over the edge of the bed, so all he could see were the dirty floorboards. And all he could hear was Jack's low whisper in his ear. "I'll show you pain, if that's what yer wee heart desires," Jack hissed, sending shivers down Will's spine. The dread-locks fell on Will's face and the beard tickled his ear. The smell of rum and tobacco in Jack's breath would have been enough to intoxicate any man, but it was not so much the odor as the words coming out of the man's mouth that made Will wriggle even more vigorously. "Now, if I were to thrust me knob up yer arse..." There was no need to finish the sentence for Jack could already sense the desired effect as Will's whole body stiffened beneath him. In addition to hearing about it, Will could also feel the said organ, pressing hard against his buttocks, and dispelling the last hope of this being some sort of joke on Jack's part. "Know that I could take ye right 'ere..." Jack breathed into his ear. "Could have me way with ye all night long and no one would be any the wiser 'bout it, either, no matter how much ye screamed." Jack removed his hand from Will's mouth and grasped his hair instead, pulling the man's head back and closer to him. "An' believe me, me lad - ye be screaming!" Before Will could form a somewhat coherent sentence, Jack had already pulled away, leaving him hanging face down on the edge of the bed. "But to your very good fortune," Jack said as he fell on his back once more and prepared to go to sleep at last, "Captain Jack Sparrow has never been compelled to take anyone unwittingly... unwishingly... no, unwillingly!" Jack sounded almost cheerful when finding the lost word and added: "Now, that would be the bad kinda pain, mate." Will stumbled to his feet, gulping for air. The shock started to pass and was replaced by pure rage. "You, you... you scared the life out of me!" he finally managed to shout at Jack. "How could you do that?! How could you after, after what... Damn you, Jack, damn you to hell!" With wobbly legs but great determination Will walked towards the door. However, Jack proved more nimble of the two and blocked his way. "Whoa, hold your horses!" Jack squeezed himself between Will and the door. "Look, I'm sorry and all that. I forgot! People forget!" "Forgot?! That was all we'd been talking about!" "Aye, but me mind was..." Jack said awkwardly while trying to push Will backwards. "...on other matters." But Will wasn't moving. He refused to be treated like a little boy, like Jack could do what he liked and then simply plead human. "Obviously!" Will snapped and reached again for the door. "Couldn't care less about me, now could you? You 'forgot'?! Well, you can forget about your ship as well, because I'm leaving!" "Oh no, you don't," Jack said and by giving Will a harder push, managed to knock him down onto the bed. Raising his hands as a sign of surrender, he continued more soothingly, "No reason for you to go wondering round the town and get lost - again. Why, you can have the bunk all to yourself, and I'll stay way, waaaay over 'ere in the corner, so you don't have to worry 'bout a thing, mate. Savvy?" Will watched Jack retreat theatrically into the corner and with plenty of gesticulating directed at him and intended as reassuring, the pirate captain sat finally down on the floor. "Worried about the ship, are we?" Will asked sardonically. "For your information, I'm here solely because of Elizabeth and I *will* find her. And if you want your ship, you have no choice but to help me. Apart from than that, I don't care about you and you certainly don't give a toss about me, so there. Just go... 'mount' someone and be done with it." "Anyone in particular?" asked Jack with the grin in his voice. "Sod off, Jack," Will muttered as he snuggled up and decided to get at least a wink of sleep before the night was over. *** Both men lay silent for a while, Will in the bed and Jack curled up in his corner. Yet again it fell on Will to break the silence. Sleep refused to come and Will's head was crammed with thoughts, most of them rather disturbing, and all of them revolving around the man in the corner of the room. Slowly and not even himself knowing why, he got up, walked warily towards the sleeping pirate and sat next to him on the floor. "Missed me already?" Will was startled by Jack's question. He could have sworn the man was deep asleep. "I can't sleep," Will said quietly. "You're an ass, you know that?" "Agreed. So, you forgive me then, luv?" Jack asked with an evil grin on his face as he pushed himself to sit up. "I knew you couldn't stay mad for long." "Who said I'm not mad?" Will said, but the tone of his voice told otherwise. As indifferently as he could, Will asked, "So, are you going to finish the `bloody bedtime story'? And I *don't* want you to show me this time." "Now, why would you come all the way across the room, leave your comfy bed to sit around this filthy floor, if you didn't?" Jack asked innocently and could hear Will gulp. It was excruciating enough for Will to admit that Jack truly had a point, but it was even more difficult to acknowledge the fact that Jack had been the one to realise it. It had taken Will practically no time at all to get over his anger after Jack's stupid stunt, which should have been a clear sign in itself, not to mention that the only thought in his head since then had been whether or not Jack would do it again. And the most disturbing thing was that he was increasingly rooting for 'yes'. "It's not comfortable," Will managed to say. "The bed." "I know, mate, always prefer the sturdy floor boards meself," Jack said seriously, furrowing his brows. "Don't touch a bed if I can possibly avoid it. An absolute murder those things are, no two ways about it." "Shut up, Jack," Will snapped and started to get up. "Should have known it was a mistake, coming here." "And why did you come here, young William?" Jack asked as he grabbed hold of Will's arm, pulling him down again. "I don't know Jack - why did you go after me?" Will's question caught Jack completely off-guard. "I know you did, from the tavern, you went after me. You couldn't possibly have found me otherwise. I was far from the docks, you said so yourself." Jack looked uneasy, a look which Will hadn't witnessed before and thought wholly uncharacteristic of the great pirate captain. But quickly the embarrassment shifted and Will's arguments had to yield before Jack's golden smile. "We're worried about you here, not me and me doings," Jack said evasively, but still smiling rather smugly. "We now know what Jack wants, so once more, what might Will want?" "How should I know?!" Will cried out in distress as the focus shifted back on him. "I was very nearly... you know, tonight, by those, those... dogs!" he said finally, remembering the word Jack had used. "And then you, you scared me half to death, and I should be mad and scared, but I'm not! I'm not!" "You want me to be scarier?" Jack asked smilingly. "That shouldn't present a problem." "No, it's me! There's something wrong with me!" Will exclaimed, falling to his knees. "I'm *not* scared of you, I'm *not* afraid that you'll do it again! Don't you see? I *should* be, Jack! I love Elizabeth, I'm *not* one of them, I love Elizabeth..." "Now, of course you do," Jack said soothingly, letting his hand push the hair gently from Will's face. "I've seen the lass and can't blame you, mate. But she's not here." "No, she's not," Will said quietly as his eyes met Jack's. "So, would you... finish the story? That is, if you want to." "I think we've already established my sentiments on the subject," Jack said, and Will nodded smilingly as he remembered what he had felt against his buttocks earlier. "First I must tell you that I..." Will started cautiously. "You're not going to confess to being a eunuch after all, are you?" Jack asked anxiously. "You *are* an ass, Jack. I mean that I haven't ever done... anything. Ever." "Never-ever?" Jack asked, amazed. "Never-ever-ever?" Will shook his head slowly. "Never been with a lass?" "No." "With a fella?" "No!" "Not with a sheep?" Jack asked cautiously, as if fearing the answer. "Fine," Will said, declining to offer Jack any more laughs at his expense. "Think of me what you will, but that's the truth." Will felt ashamed and angry at the same time. He had been proud to wait for Elizabeth, but in front of Jack it all seemed so naive and even pitiful. "So, if you don't want to anymore, I'll understand..." "I'd be honored, luv," came Jack's simple reply, followed by a soft kiss that took Will completely by surprise. "What sailor wouldn't enjoy being the first to plow through uncharted waters?" The second kiss threw Will off-balance and on his back to the floor. Jack was all over him, nibbling, licking, tasting, sucking, and all he could do was to open himself to him and let the man navigate him through these unknown waters. "Jack," Will hissed between kisses, "this will be the other kind of pain, right? The good kind?" Jack mumbled something reminding of 'yes', unable to tear himself away from Will's lips for much longer. The shirt was almost off, revealing a long-awaited sight for Jack to admire and explore. "You sure?" Will asked panting. The pleasure was about to become too great for his mind to work properly. Soon it would have to give in for good and let other parts of his body to take over. Jack's mouth was burning holes into his skin, and Will was seriously beginning to worry, whether he would simply evaporate if the man were to continue piercing him. "Yes!" Jack cried out anguished. "Will you just trust me and shut the hell up!" Jack grabbed Will's hand and pulled him up, and before he knew it, Will was on his stomach on the bed, with Jack behind him, pulling down two pairs of breeches most vigorously. All Will was able to hear was Jack's short sigh of triumph when the breeches hit the floor and the sound of spitting, the meaning of which was left unknown to him for the time being. Then, without further warning, came the pain. "Jack!" Will cried. The surprise only added to what felt more like a piece of sharpened metal than human flesh forcing its way inside him. So far, the good kind of pain was proving to be worse than any other suffering Will had ever endured. Through his clenched teeth he managed to hiss: "You call this *good*?!" "Wait, just wait," Jack panted into Will's ear. "It be better, just wait." Will concentrated on breathing while Jack dug his teeth into his neck. Their already sweaty bodies were entwined, two skins melting together. Between kissing and nibbling, Jack reached to pin Will's arms down above his head, and was pleased to encounter no resistance from the quietly moaning man. What Jack was unaware of was, that this was precisely what Will had been dreaming of - Jack taking him over so completely and mercilessly and he being the most willing booty for the pirate captain to claim as his. Just as Will thought the worst was over and his flesh began to give in to Jack's, the man started moving himself slowly, pushing inch by inch deeper inside him. The pain returned, although now it appeared to be getting more tolerable, and with every new push it gradually changed into sensations even Will had not dared to dream of. "Oh my god, Jack..." Will murmured as the pain proved to be every bit as good as Jack had promised it to be. "Jack..." ***** Will stood by the window, letting the salty wind cool his body and dry off the sweat from his shirt. The sun was already climbing up in the sky, but the town of Tortuga was still fast asleep, including Jack, who snored loudly on his stomach, looking most content. Slightly disappointed and increasingly annoyed, Will watched him sleep. That damned drink. Apart from the pounding headache the blacksmith was also suffering from a bad case of remorse. He shouldn't have drunk that much, not being used to it the same way the pirates seemed to be. Or at least this one particular pirate. Consequently, due to the rather large quantities of ale consumed in the course of the even, Will had become a victim to the age-old nuisance of his sex: his drunken mind had been more than willing, but his equally drunken body had failed him miserably. So now, the only satisfied man in the room snored blissfully, wasting the precious time they had left before sailing after Barbossa. And after Elizabeth. There were simply too many things roaming around his aching head for him to even start reconsidering his feelings for Elizabeth. The first and foremost would be to rescue her and return her to home. All else remained a blur. She would then be free to marry Norrington, which was what her father wanted, and fathers usually had the last say in these matters. And, more importantly, Will wasn't at all certain whether he wanted to interfere anymore. A sudden cough from the bed brought Will back from his thoughts. "Will?" Jack mumbled, still half-asleep. "You're not here. Why aren't you here?" "I *am* here," Will said smilingly as he walked to the bed. "I was just thinking." "At this hour?" Jack's voice came faintly from underneath the mass of black hair covering his entire face. "Come back to bed." "What is it with you and sleeping?" Will asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed. "That's all you could talk about last night, too." "Ah, but that was only to shut you up and hence prevent me knob from bursting." "Oh, I see." Will chuckled, pleased at the thought of Jack wanting him as much as he had wanted Jack. But he continued more seriously: "But what now, Jack? Where do I stand now?" "You're standing right here in Tortuga with me," Jack explained sleepily. "Except that you are, in fact, sitting and I'm sleeping, and you should be sleeping too, with me." The long string of confused words had obviously strained Jack and after a deep sigh he fell silent. "But where does this leave me?" Will continued his musings. "Where's *my* place after this?" "Oh, I'm certain you will find your place soon enough, luv," Jack said assuredly and dug his face deeper into the pillow. And as Jack moved, Will noticed his shirt shifting, only a little, but enough to reveal a hint of the bare buttocks underneath. "Somehow I think I've already found a place," Will said, smiling to himself. "A good place, I hope?" "You tell me," Will replied secretively as he moved closer to Jack and pulled the man's shirt up some more. "I think my place should be right here, between this cheek..." Will squeezed Jack's left buttock gently, and then, moving his hand on the other one, he added: "...and this one." "Oh, that be a good place," Jack muttered seemingly more alert. "That be a very good place." ***** The End ***** |
