by LeFey
'Stop lying,' he admonished himself. Mac was scared and
he had a right to be. Vic had never hurt him but he had
pushed him to the limits of his endurance, only to try
and think of a way to go beyond that.
"I don't want to do this all the time. I need something
normal," Mac had blurted out just before he left, the
last time they were together.
"You got two guys getting each other off. Normal is
kind of a contradiction in terms, isn't it?"
Mac turned to him, his dark eyes bewildered. He looked
incredibly young and troubled, like a child who knew
Santa didn't exist but didn't want to give up the
comfort of the myth.
"I want to have.. to go.." he struggled to find the
right words. "I want a date, Vic. I want us to have a
date. I need some affection." The last words might as
well have been 'go to hell' for the way they were said.
Vic had agreed, too tired and spent to fight about it.
Now, standing outside the door, he wasn't sure if he
could go through with it. Despite the things they had
done and said to one another, Vic clung to the lie that
it was just a game.
He rapped lightly on the door. Maybe Mac wouldn't hear;
maybe he was in the back, then Vic could honestly say he
had showed up and no one answered.
He heard Mac's footsteps approaching.
The door flew open. Mac was smiling, that baby-toothed
smile that turned him into a big goofy kid.
He reached out to pull Vic into a kiss.
"What.." Vic straight-armed Mac when he leaned towards
him.
"What are you doing?" He pushed Mac back through the
doorway of the apartment. Vic stepped inside and closed
the door behind him.
"I'm trying to kiss you hello, you jerk." Mac held out
his hands and looked incredulous.
"Somebody could see us." Victor motioned behind him.
"I thought I heard the elevator."
"That's just great. It's really good to see you too,
Vic. As long as no one else does."
Victor pushed past him and walked to the kitchen.
"Don't get sensitive on me," he threw over his
shoulder. He heard Mac let out an angry breath. After
a moment there was the sound of his footsteps as he
followed him.
Mac took a seat at the kitchen bar as Vic rummaged
through the cupboards.
"Glasses are in the cabinet, right of the sink," Mac
offered.
He opened the paper bag that Victor had set on the
counter, and withdrew a bottle.
"This is nice," Mac commented sarcastically. "You
always bring a bottle of Jack Daniels on a date."
Victor took the bottle from his hand, opened it and
poured a draft into the glass of ice he held.
"Vic, tell me how this seduction technique of yours
works. You usually get your date drunk or just hit them
over the head with the bottle?"
Vic raised his glass in a salute and narrowed his eyes.
"I know which I'd rather do to you."
"You said this was going to be different," Mac accused.
"No. You said you wanted it to be different. I said
I'd show up."
"Show up! Be careful Vic, or I'll get a big head from
all your attention," Mac shot back.
"Stop talking like a queer."
Vic drained his glass and turned towards the sink.
"You go to fucking hell, Mansfield." Mac said the words
slowly, each one sharp edged, ringing with hurt and
barely controlled anger.
Vic still had his back to Mac when he spoke.
"Sorry," he said softly but there was no response. "I
don't know how to do this. I don't know how to be . a
guy's. boyfriend."
"I don't either, Vic. But I'm willing to try. I think
you're worth it. Despite the fact you think I'm shit."
Vic turned slowly and leaned against the sink. It took
him a moment before he could look at Mac.
"I'm the one who's shit." He held out his hand to Mac.
"I'm sorry. Can we start over?"
Mac stepped around the counter and into the kitchen to
join Vic. He slipped his arms around Vic's waist.
"Let's just start," he whispered. Mac kissed him
softly, sliding his lips lightly over the perfect bow of
Vic's mouth. Victor's hands slipped under the blue
muslin of Mac's loose shirt. His finger's traced the
valley of his spine and Mac leaned into him. They
kissed till they were both lost in the delight of
exploring and being explored by the others' mouth.
Mac slid one hand over Vic's stomach and felt the
expected quiver as he circled his navel through the
light denim shirt. He let his touch wander up Vic's
body to tweak his nipple, then cup and fondle his pec.
Victor shoved him back.
"What the fuck is that?" His face was rouged with
arousal and anger.
"I..I.. was just..just.." Mac stammered, startled by his
sudden fury.
"I'm not a woman, Mac," Vic bellowed. "I'm not going to
stand here while you try to feel me up like one of those
club girl whores you used to fuck."
"I didn't mean ."
Vic pushed past him and started for the door.
Mac followed a moment later, as angry at the rejection
as Vic seemed to be from his attention.
"You can't just walk out, Mansfield," he hollered after
him.
"Watch me."
Mac tackled him, pushing Vic onto the couch. They
struggled and grappled, each trying to gain the
advantage over the other. Victor slipped off the couch
and Mac landed on top of him. It was enough. Mac pinned
Vic's hands above his head with one of his own. He
placed the thumb of his free hand on the hollow of Vic's
neck and made him yelp.
"Lie still," Mac instructed as he panted. "I can make
this very painful for you." He increased the pressure a
little and Victor grimaced but didn't call out. Mac let
up but kept his thumb poised on the spot.
"You're going to listen to me, you pig-headed fuck."
"I'm not going to be your bitch," Victor screamed. Vic
struggled but then grew still and tried to move away
from Mac's thumb on his neck.
"But it's fine for me to be your torture toy."
"It's a game. You called it extreme sport. Sports are
man shit. I'm not going to be a woman for you. I'm a
man."
"You're a coward."
Vic raised himself off the floor and overturned Mac. In
a moment Vic held him down, his hands pressing Mac's
wrists into the carpet.
Vic ground himself against Mac's groin.
"I could make you come, right now." He whispered the
threat.
"You can always make me come," Mac conceded, turning his
face away from Victor. "I'm not a coward. I can admit
that. I can say it and still be a man."
"You go to hell," Vic seethed. He picked Mac's hands
off the rug and slammed them down. "What do you want
from me?"
"What I want, you can't do," Mac threw back at him.
Vic raised him up and threw him back to impact with the
floor.
"I can do anything. I'm stronger than you."
"That's right you are," Mac yelled. "You're braver too,
you have more integrity, and you're not afraid to show
you care." Mac narrowed his eyes and looked directly at
Victor. "Except with me."
"You don't understand."
"No, Vic I don't. I don't understand what happened to
you that you have to make sex into a test of endurance.
No wonder LiAnn dumped you."
Vic's grip on Mac tightened till he had to flex his
hands to keep the circulation going.
"I never did anything like that with her. You know
that!" The last words were screamed into his face.
"Then why do you have to always do it to me?" Mac
shouted back.
"It gets you off, too. You told me it was the most
intense sex you ever had."
"It's getting weird, Vic. I can't do it all the time."
Mac's voice trailed off till it was barely a whisper.
"I need some affection. I miss the intimate, good
stuff."
Vic released him immediately and rocked back on his
heels.
"This isn't going to work." Vic began to rise but Mac
grabbed his arms.
"I asked you once before, you want to quit?" Mac
challenged.
Vic looked at him but soon glanced away, unable to keep
in contact with the raw emotion, the need and fear in
Mac's eyes.
"No." Vic didn't hesitate this time. "But I can't be
the woman."
Mac pulled himself up to a sitting position.
"Neither can I. But I need you to give me more."
"What do you mean?" Vic asked warily.
"You like it to be a challenge between us," Mac threw at
him. "So, I've got a test for you. You man enough to
let me make love to you?"
"What are you talking about? You want to fuck me? No!"
They were both kneeling, facing, each man locked in the
others angry gaze.
"I don't want to fuck you," Mac threw back at him.
"Where the hell did that come from? I want to hold you
and kiss you and touch you. Make love with you the way
I knew before you introduced me to sex as a blood sport."
"You mean like to a woman." Vic's tone dripped with
disdain.
"I mean like to another human being," Mac screamed. He
raised his hand and held up two fingers.
"You've got two choices, Vic." Mac's hand trembled as
he showed it to Victor. "You do what I tell you, or you
get out. If you leave, I'm still your partner. I'll
always have your back, but there'll be no sex, of any
kind, ever."
Vic's mouth opened as he began to protest.
Mac held up his hand to stop him.
"It's not negotiable. Make a choice."
Victor looked away from Mac. He was shaky from the
emotions that raged in him. Anger charged his body. He
felt anger at Mac for posing this ultimatum, and anger
at himself for being in this position. But fear was
what kept him unable to respond, although he couldn't
put that name to it. He didn't want this to end. He
couldn't imagine a time when he wouldn't be allowed to
grab Mac, wrestle him down and feel that incredible
mouth against his own. But it was all a matter of
trust. And after all the betrayals Victor had suffered
he wasn't certain he could give that degree of trust to
anyone, even Mac.
"I don't know what you want," Vic said and slowly
lowered his head.
The anger and impatience on Mac's face melted and
concern creased his brow. He took Vic's face in his
hands. He kissed him gently on the lips, trying to
reassure him.
"You just have to make a choice, Vic. I need you to
give me . something. I need it to be more than a game
between us."
Victor moved his head till his temple rested against
Mac's cheek. His voice was little more than a whispered
plea when he spoke.
"What do you want me to do?"
Mac put the fingers of one hand under Vic's chin and
raised his head to look at him.
"I'm going to take my shirt off, then you put your hands
on my shoulders."
Mac quickly pulled the loose muslin shirt over his
head.
Victor brought his hands to rest tentatively on Mac's
shoulders.
"Look at me, Vic," Mac coaxed.
Vic managed to look at Mac's mouth but couldn't meet his
eyes.
"You're so hot and fine," Mac whispered, as he reached
for the front of Vic's shirt. "I know you don't believe
that about yourself, but I know you are." He unbuttoned
Vic's shirt, unbuckling the heavy leather belt he wore
before he pulled the garment out of Vic's jeans and
undid the last button.
"I use to ask LiAnn 'what do you see in that guy?'" Mac
said, trailing his fingers over the smooth muscled skin
of Vic's bare chest. "She didn't have to tell me,
'cause I saw it too."
He ran his hands inside the shirt, his fingers curling
in a caress at Vic's neck. Then he pushed the shirt
aside, brushing over the tense muscles of Vic's
shoulders and back.
"The first time I saw you," Mac whispered next to Vic's
ear as he pushed the shirt off to puddle on the floor,
"in her apartment, it flashed through my mind even then,
he's prime."
Mac kissed him, slowly, his mouth sliding over the
contours, probing the hollow of Vic's parted lips.
Mac broke away and took a deep breath. He rested his
forehead against Vic's.
"And you've had the advantage over me ever since."
"Mac," Vic whispered. "I don't want to quit. It's
just..." His voice trailed off.
"I know, Vic. I'm afraid too."
Mac pulled him into a firm embrace. They held each
other for a long time, till finally each relaxed enough
to stroke the other.
"Want to go in the bedroom?" Mac asked as Vic's fingers
made little circles over the small of his back.
Vic nodded his head against Mac's shoulder.
They stood and Mac turned Vic around, pointing him
towards the bedroom. "I want to get something. I'll be
right in."
When Mac entered the room Vic was already in bed,
propped against the headboard. Covered by a sheet his
lower body presented a sleek outline, punctuated by a
healthy erection under the soft cotton fabric.
"What've you got?" Vic pointed at the objects Mac
carried in on a folded white towel.
"Here, smell," he said as he offered a tube of red
paisley to Vic then finished undressing himself.
Vic took what felt like a beanbag, warm and nubby to the
touch, and sniffed. It was aromatic with herbs and the
sharp note of pine.
"What is this?"
"It's an herbal wrap, filled with rice. You heat it in
the microwave and put it on your body where you ache.
The heat radiates out and makes you feel better."
Mac took the hem of the sheet and pulled it away
revealing Vic's body and his dusky cock.
"So where do you ache, Vic?" Mac gave him a wicked grin.
Vic laughed. caught off guard by the idea.
"Lie down," Mac encouraged as he took the wrap from
Vic's hands.
Vic scooted down the bed till he lay flat, his head
cradled on two down pillows.
"This is going to feel so good," Mac assured him and
wound the warm, scented wrap around Vic's erection.
The sensation was incredible. Vic arched off the bed,
as the all encompassing warmth seemed to draw pleasure,
heat, and desire to a throbbing focal point between his
legs.
Mac pulled off two rubber bands that braceleted his
wrist and secured the herb wrap, base and top. Just the
head of Vic's penis peeked from the muffler of red
paisley. Then Mac took both hands and gently squeezed
the wrap.
Vic writhed beneath the torturous pleasure.
"Good, huh? All that heat and those little crunchy bits
of rice tickling everywhere. I'll get another one of
these and sometime we'll see who can last the longest."
"It's too good," Vic moaned and placed his hands on
Mac's to get him to stop. It was so different letting
Mac do these things to him. It was hard not to grab
him, throw him down and take the game from him. But all
his senses seemed heightened by giving in to Mac. The
slightest touch reverberated through his nerves. And he
was not distracted by of what he could do to make Mac
concede. Victor only had the ever increasing pleasure
to hold onto, and it threatened to overwhelm him.
Mac stopped massaging the wrap and Vic exhaled, grateful
for the break, yet almost regretting the loss of
titillation.
"I'm going to make you come without touching your cock,"
Mac said in a husky whisper before his mouth covered
Vic's. More warmth accompanied the kiss, along with the
rich, sweet scent of herbs and pine as Mac caressed him
with a smaller square wrap held in the palm of his
hand.
Wonderful diverse sensations tantalized Vic. Mac's soft
full lips sucked and pressed at Vic's mouth. Mac's
tongue darted in to tease against his own. His long
fingers trailed light maddening touches over Vic's bare
shoulder and down his arm to tickle briefly over his
palm. Warmth radiated up his thighs as Mac pressed the
small pad of heated rice and herbs along the inside of
his legs. The soft flannel of the cover, the prickle of
the points of the rice raised goosebumps as Mac ever-so-
lightly moved it over the fine hairs on his sensitized
skin.
Vic had never experienced sex like this. He had never
been the object of another's desire. Sex had always been
something he did to someone else. It was either an
ordeal, trying to get some response, or done quickly to
avoid rejection. He had experienced new intensity of
sensation with Mac as they escalated their 'extreme
sport', but nothing compared to this.
His cock jumped in the heated confines of the wrap.
Mac broke their kiss and laughed softly when he felt the
twitch.
"Feel like you're about to explode?"
Vic moaned as the idea made his muscle bound again.
"Pervert," he managed, his voice low and heavy with
need. "You've done this to yourself, haven't you?"
"Not exactly like this. But I've thought a lot about
doing it to you."
"Do it," Vic pleaded. "Touch me. Mac, I'm in misery!
Touch me."
"I told you, no cock." Mac ran the heated square of
nubby rice over one of Vic's nipples, drawing a shivery
moan at the luscious sensation.
"I'm going to kiss you." Mac slid down Vic's body and
ran his tongue up the inside of his legs.
"You're trying to kill me," Vic said through clinched
teeth.
"I'm going to pet you," Mac told him, as his free hand
teased at Vic's taut balls, while the hand holding the
small wrap massaged the warmth into his stomach.
"Mac, I need it your hand to get me off."
"You don't need it," Mac chastised softly.
Vic thought he would go crazy at the building sensations
that plagued his body. Unrelenting, unremitting,
ceaseless, unbearable, unendurable, hundreds of words
for the erotic sensual torture he was being subjected to
stormed in his mind. Finally, a ceaseless chant of 'I
can't take it' repeated over and over again till his
excited nerve endings seemed to throb to its cadence.
Mac moved up his body, trailing more sensation as he
went, till he was spooned against Vic's side, kissing
his neck, leaving small pecks along his tense jaw line.
"Come for me, baby," Mac cooed between kisses. "Just
let it happen." He gently crushed the warm scrunchy
wrap over first one nipple then the other.
The sensation melted into Vic's bones. Everywhere he
was touched sparked directly to his cock. The tip of
his penis, the only part exposed to the air, was cool
from its coating of precum. It was a delicious,
distracting contrast to the pulsing heat that radiated
from the wrap bound around him. Expanding universe,
expanding cock, big bang, unimaginable orgasm, his mind
was beyond sense. He existed only in the widening,
increasing, swelling mass of flesh that threatened to go
nova.
And Mac kept up his chant:
"Come for me, baby"
And Victor kept counterpoint with his:
I can't take it.
Light flashed behind his closed eyelids and the pleasure
hot and fast, cool and sweet raised his shoulders off
the bed. An effortless flood of ecstasy swept through
every cell, washing away his bones, his muscles, his
being.
He lay panting, feeling Mac press against him.
The wrap was removed from his shrinking cock and the
coolness of the air brought him back.
He opened his eyes and saw Mac toss the herb wraps to
the floor. Mac picked up the towel and wiped Vic
clean. He peppered a few kisses on Vic's still
sensitive, but limp, member making him squirm at the
sensation.
Mac rocked back on his heels and began to stroke himself.
"No, wait," Victor raised himself from the bed.
"I can't wait," Mac said, his voice thick with
necessity.
Vic pulled him down on the bed and swiftly arranged
himself over Mac's loins. In a second he had Mac's
engorged dick in his mouth.
Mac moaned and squirmed at the feeling.
In another second Vic was gagging.
"Sorry," he coughed, wiped his mouth with the back of
his hand and tried again. He gagged even sooner this
time.
Mac winced as teeth dragged along his length.
When Vic came up for air this time Mac stopped him.
"You don't have to do this, Vic."
"I want to." He was about to go down again when Mac
took his face in his hands.
"Vic don't. Just do this." Mac thrust the flat of his
index finger between Vic's lips as he tried to speak.
"Put your lips on the underside of the shaft and stick
out your tongue a little." He mimicked the directions
with his finger. "Just move your mouth up and down and
suck."
Vic put his lips to Mac's cock and in moments the other
man was writhing beneath him. Vic worked him till his
gasps and moans blended into a jerking cry and Mac
spilled himself.
Mac relaxed back onto the bed. His hand went to his
forehead as he let out a deep breath.
"Wow," he said in a blissful, spent voice. "That mouth
is as sweet as it looks."
He glanced down as he felt Vic using the towel to clean
him. When he finished Mac leaned towards him and took
the towel away.
"Here," he said and put his hand on the back of Vic's
head. "You got a little on your cheek." He dabbed at
the tiny spattering of come on Vic's face. Mac
completed the task by rubbing his thumb across the skin
to make sure it was dry. His face clouded, a curious
frown narrowing his eyes.
"You shaved," he accused. "You shaved before you came
over tonight."
Vic smiled and kissed him lightly on the lips.
"Of course I did. I always shave before a date."
"A date," Mac's voice rose in protest. "You mean after
everything you put me through, you thought of it as a
date too?"
Vic just nodded.
Mac shook his head, and a smile of disbelief erased the
frown.
"God, Mansfield. You can be such a dick."
"Get use to it." Vic pulled Mac into his arms. "I'm
your dick, now."
At Odd Angles
ic stood in the hallway outside Mac's apartment. He
started to knock but held back. Things had gotten
complicated. The sex was great. Being around Mac could
be a blast. He was funny, mercurial and affectionate.
But that was the obstacle between them, tenderness. Vic
loved, craved, nearly lived for the desperate, test of
wills that sex had become between them. But Mac was
having second thoughts. Vic shook his head.
