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Double or Nothing Alex winced then smiled as a hard body pressed his into the kitchen wall, and a
low growl sounded in his ear.
"Now. You were saying?"
"Saying...wh-what was I saying?"
"Something about warm milk, I believe."
"Oh yeah. Let me dig out a sauce pan, and I'll heat some up for you. Then I'll
tuck you into bed," Alex croaked then grunted as Fox's teeth closed over the
curve between his neck and shoulder.
"Fuck the milk," Fox murmured, drawing his tongue over the wounded skin. "But
bed sounds good. Let's go."
Alex turned in his lover's arms and focused a limp-lidded stare on him.
"Actually, I was thinking I'd stay up a while and get some of this stuff
straightened out."
"We can do that tomorrow," Fox answered, sliding his hands down to Alex's rear,
squeezing the denim-covered muscle. He gently humped the younger man's erection
and smiled at the broken moan. "You're coming to bed with me."
"But I'm not tired."
Fox backed Alex flush against the wall, and ground their hips together.
Capturing the other man's lower lip in his teeth, his tugged firmly then
released it. "Good." He curled the fingers of one hand in the front of Alex's
shirt and pulled his lover through the kitchen and into the bedroom.
Alex looked down at what would pass for their bed tonight then gave Fox a tiny
grin.
"The mattress isn't made."
"Where's the box with the sheets?"
"I put it over there," Alex nodded toward the box in the corner.
Stalking over to the box, Fox opened it up and yanked out the first set he came
across. Tossing the fitted sheet at Alex, he set about stuffing the pillows into
their cases.
Alex caught the sheet as it hit him in the chest and began stretching it over
the mattress. His cock throbbed in time to the pounding of the rest of his body,
and his hands shook in their effort to get the last corner secured. The moment
he did, he found himself flattened, Fox's weight pressing him into the mattress.
Fully expecting a hard, fast session, He gasped softly, more than a bit
surprised when Fox's mouth and hands tenderly began to wander over his back and
shoulders.
"Long day, huh?"
Fox lifted himself into a sitting position, and his hands began to move in firm
strokes over his lover's back.
"Yeah," Alex sighed, his body tingling with pleasure.
"I've been in that same apartment for so many years," Fox mused as he worked on
loosening Alex's muscles. "Feels a little odd to be somewhere else." He smiled
down at the man beneath him. "Good, though."
"Mmm hmm. Real good."
"Alex?"
Hmmm?"
"Are you falling asleep?"
"No."
"I think you are."
"How can I think about sleeping with you sitting on my ass?"
Fox laughed softly and slid his hands up under Alex's shirt.
"Take this off."
With his lover's assistance, Alex removed the shirt and lowered his head to the
pillow, waiting. The feel of Fox's hands again, caressing his back closed his
eyes and pulled another moan from him.
Fox leaned in and nuzzled Alex's jaw, then his ear.
"Alex."
"...Yeah?"
"Are you tired?"
Sable lashes lifted part way, and Alex inhaled deeply, recognizing the tone in
Fox's voice. Though he had acted aggressively at first and given Alex every
reason to believe that he would be the one on top tonight, Fox obviously had had
a change of heart.
"No." Alex twisted and turned until he lay on his back and Fox now straddled his
hips. He reached up, stroking his lover's arms and chest. "I'm not tired.
C'mere."
Fox lowered himself slowly until he was stretched out along the length of Alex's
body, then the younger man rolled, depositing him on the mattress. Holding Fox's
gaze, he removed his shirt then began working on his pants. When Fox was naked
and writhing beneath him, he removed the rest of his own clothing.
"You know," Alex purred, leaning in close to Fox's mouth. "We really should take
a shower. We've been humping furniture and boxes around all day."
"Guess you're right," Fox agreed, lifting himself high enough to lap at the
younger man's mouth. "Uh...d'you know which box the towels are in?"
"In the bathroom box, in the bathroom."
"You're so organized," Fox grinned up at him.
"Yes, I am," Alex concurred. "What the hell would you ever do without me?"
"I don't know," Fox whispered, stroking the side of Alex's head. "Wither and
die, I suppose."
Alex emitted a soft breath and rose from the bed, pulling Fox up after him.
After digging out a couple of towels and any other bath accessories that they
would need for tonight and tomorrow, the two stepped into the shower, washing
and teasing each other into a high state of arousal. Nearly fifteen minutes
later, Alex had found their condoms and lube, and they tumbled damp and flushed
onto the bed, Alex covering Fox with his weight.
Threading his fingers through glistening, sable hair, Fox pulled his lover down
for a deep kiss then dragged his tongue over his warm lips.
"I've been waiting all day to be alone with you."
"You want me, baby?"
"So much," Fox moaned, winding his arms around his lover's neck. "Fuck me, Alex.
Please. I want to feel you inside me."
The last word was barely out of Fox's mouth when Alex took it in a hard kiss,
pushing his lover's head back into the pillows.
Moaning into his lover's mouth, Fox's hands combed feverishly through his hair,
encouraging Alex to drink more deeply. He felt the younger man's tongue push
into his mouth, and he met it eagerly with his own, giving all that his lover
demanded of him.
Alex slid an arm around the small of Fox's back as the older man arched against
him and held him to the hard warmth of his body as his mouth traveled down the
stubble-roughened jaw and over the taut lines of his lover's throat.
"Your skin is so hot," he rumbled against the base of Fox's throat as his free
hand stroked over his tensing rear. "You feel so good, baby. I could never get
tired of touching you."
A small sob escaped past Fox's constricted throat, and he writhed against his
lover, whimpering and begging for more contact. As Alex claimed his mouth once
more, the younger man's wandering hand found a rigid nipple and began to play
gently with it, causing Fox to tremble more violently.
"Alex," Fox gasped, breaking the kiss and pressing his face to the other man's
neck, "God. Oh, Jesus, I'm..."
"A little sensitive?" Alex asked, ducking his head to take the nipple into his
mouth.
A desperate sob pierced the air, and Fox's fingers tightened painfully in Alex's
hair.
"Guess so," Alex grated against the overly sensitive flesh then bit down on it,
driving the other man into a frenzy.
Shrieking his lover's name, Fox bucked wildly beneath him, searching for the
friction his tortured cock needed for release. But Alex moved just out of range,
prompting a groan of extreme frustration.
"I need you," Fox sobbed, clawing at the younger man's back. "Please, Alex, Iım
begging you. Please."
Alex's pulse raced, the power of Fox's words swelling his cock to painful
proportions.
Fox. His beautiful, strong, sexy Fox. Clinging to him and begging for his
attention. Craving the love only Alex could give him.
Holy Christ.
Using his hands and his mouth, Alex relentlessly drove Fox and himself to the
very edges of insanity. Again and again his lover's voice sounded, tormented and
breathless, pleading for mercy, but it wasn't until tears of frustration glazed
Fox's eyes that Alex sought to free him from the sensual hell he'd created.
Groping for the condoms he'd dropped down beside them, Alex ripped open one
packet and quickly rolled it over his deeply flushed cock then slapped on some
lube. Hands stroking the undersides of Fox's thighs, he looked down into
glistening, dark eyes.
"Let me in, Fox."
Captivated by the intensity of his lover's gaze, Fox obeyed, slowly wrapping his
arms and legs around him. Seconds later, his mouth fell open, and a long,
sobbing gasp tumbled out as Alex pushed home.
Jesus God, and Alex said he was magic...
Wiping his mind clear of coherent thought, Alex took complete command, making
his body shudder with each touch, each thrust, and the pleasure of it was
unbearable. All Fox could do in his delirium was hold tightly to his love and
let each growing wave sweep him a little farther away. When Alex took hold of
his cock and began to milk it in time to the movement of his hips, it finished
him.
A window-rattling wail broke from Fox's throat, and he clung desperately to
Alex, shaking violently as he came all over the younger man's hand and his own
stomach. Two more hard thrusts, and Alex released a ferocious roar of his own.
The sound drowned out Fox's dying cries, and he collapsed on top of his lover,
motionless and barely breathing. A long while later, Fox opened his eyes and
smiled wearily.
"Baby," he half whispered, half croaked.
No response.
"Alex."
"Hmmm."
"Babe, your..." Fox tried to get the younger man to lift himself just a little.
"...your hand. If we fall asleep like this, we're going to wind up stuck
together."
Alex rose a bit, and he fixed a glassy stare on his lover.
"Think we already are." He winced as he attempted to open his hand and
apologized at Fox's sharp intake of breath.
"Sorry. I...okay." He slipped his hand out from between them and studied the
stickiness there before directing his gaze at his lover and bringing his hand to
his mouth.
Fox's eyelids grew heavy as he watched Alex lick his palm then each finger.
"What're you trying to do?"
"Nothing. Just wanna taste you."
"Uh huh. And you don't think watching you do that is going to get me going
again?"
"Don't know," Alex purred. "Is it?"
Fox groaned softly and pushed against the other.
A mischievous smile lit Alex's face.
"You're insatiable."
"Yeah. You wouldn't think a man my age would be."
Alex nuzzled Fox's throat. "You know I'm just kidding about that. You're a young
man. Christ, you're only a couple of years older than I am."
"Mmm hmm." Fox rolled Alex beneath him and nipped at the vulnerable skin of his
throat. "And don't you forget it...uh...Alex?"
"Hmm?"
"You still wearing that rubber?"
Alex's nose crinkled. "Yeah." He reached down, hissing as he peeled the used
condom off and dropped it to the floor beside the mattress. He stared at the
wrinkled latex for a moment then turned a suddenly despondent gaze on Fox.
"I wish this was all over."
A frown creased the older man's brow. "What?"
"I wish we'd already been through all the testing."
Fox drew Alex's head down to his shoulder and kissed the sable crown.
"I know. Look, I'm due next month for all that stuff...I know it won't exactly
have been three months since you were possibly infected, but you can still get
tested. At least you might be put a little more at ease while we're waiting to
take the second test. I know a guy in the lab who'll do it quickly and quietly
for me. Okay?"
Alex nodded wordlessly.
"Hey." Fox slid two fingers under the younger man's chin and lifted his head
until he was looking into his eyes. "It's gonna be fine."
Alex hesitated a moment then nodded, offering Fox a tiny smile. His eyes drifted
shut as the older man moved in for a tender kiss. He opened them as Fox pulled
back, and the two stared at each other for a short time before kissing again.
And again, and before Alex knew it he was pinned beneath Fox, moaning and
whimpering while the older man made love to him, slowly and sweetly.
When it was over, both men lay together in a satisfied haze, purring and
nuzzling each other until Fox gained enough strength to drag himself out of bed.
He trudged into the bathroom for a couple of warm towels, and when he'd finished
cleaning himself and Alex up, he crawled back into bed and the warmth of his
lover's arms. Utterly exhausted, he fell into a deep sleep with the steady beat
of Alex's heart beneath his cheek, and a contented smile curling his lips.
A low groan sounded from the tangle of sheets and bodies as the insistent
ringing of a phone intruded on the couple's sleep.
Groping around on the floor, Alex finally found the phone and hauled it up to
his ear.
"H'llo?"
Skinner winced as the soft, hoarse voice greeted him. Shit, even half-asleep and
completely unaware, Krycek could get his motor humming.
"Uh...Krycek. I'm. Look, I'm really sorry, but...it's after eleven, and I
figured you'd have been up by now..."
"Eleven?"
"Yeah. I'm sorry, I..."
"No. No, it's okay." Alex ran a hand over his face and looked over at Fox, who
was still struggling to open his eyes. "You want to talk to Fox?"
"Yeah, I...if he's awake."
"Yeah well, sort of. Hang on."
Skinner held the line, listening to Alex attempt to rouse his barely conscious
lover.
"Fox...baby, wake up. Skinner's on the phone."
A few more words from Alex, a couple of unhappy groans later, and Fox's sleepy
voice sounded on the other end.
"Yeah?"
"Mulder, I'm sorry, I had no idea you'd be asleep at this time of day."
"Time is it?"
Skinner heard Alex inform Fox that it was after eleven, and the other man gasped
in surprise.
"It is? Damn, we were really out, huh?"
Alex gave a muffled answer, and Fox turned his attention back to the caller.
"So, what's up?"
"You told me to call you today. You didn't say what time."
"Yeah. Yeah, that's right." Fox faked the rest of the conversation. "...uh
huh...yeah, okay, I'll make the reservations for tomorrow...yeah, okay."
"Mulder, call me and let me know what's going on, you understand?"
"Yeah. I will."
Fox disconnected and, taking a deep breath, silently asked Alex to forgive him
for the lie he was about to tell.
"Babe..."
"You got that case."
"Yeah."
"You gotta leave tomorrow?"
Fox nodded, avoiding Alex's eyes.
Stroking his lover's hair, Alex planted a kiss on his forehead.
"Okay."
"Alex, I..."
"Don't worry about it. And don't ask me to come with you. I got a ton of stuff
to keep me busy, and I'll be perfectly safe here." He gave Fox a crooked smile.
"Even with the big bad Skinner upstairs."
Fox returned the smile then pulled Alex into his arms.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive."
"I'll make it quick as I can."
Alex nodded and kissed the other man.
"Just be careful and call me when you can."
"You know I will. In the meantime, we'd better get our asses up. I want to at
least get all the furniture placed today."
After breakfast, Fox made his flight reservations, then he and Alex began moving
the furniture around. They finished just before six and decided to call it a
night. They spent the rest of the evening eating takeout and watching
television, and at around ten-thirty, they turned in.
Now able to sleep in their fully assembled bed, Fox made love to Alex until
midnight, then lay wide awake while the younger man slept soundly in his arms.
He stared up at the ceiling, thinking about getting to Californina and finding
the mother fucker who'd drugged and raped his love.
Enjoy yourself while you can, you fucking, filthy piece of shit. Your time's
just about up.
"...And you've got enough underwear?"
"You packed it. Besides," Fox grinned over at his lover. "It'd be a little late
now, wouldn't it?"
Alex murmured his agreement and watched the signs.
"You said terminal nine, right?"
"Yeah."
"Well, your turn's coming up."
Fox took the proper exit and pulled up in front of the terminal. He put the car
in park then turned to Alex, giving his lover a reassuring smile.
"I'll call you as soon as I get there, okay?"
Alex nodded and accepted a long, sweet kiss before he and Fox separated, and the
older man retrieved his garment bag and suitcase from the trunk.
"Better get these checked."
"Yeah."
Fox hesitated a moment more then, not giving a shit who might be looking, he
walked up to Alex and kissed him once more.
"Love you."
"Love you, too."
He began to back away.
"If you need me, Alex..."
"I'll call you. But I'll be fine. I promise."
"Okay...bye, babe."
Alex raised his hand and watched Fox disappear into the terminal. A few seconds
later, he took a deep breath and made himself get into the car and drive away.
Los Angeles.
Several minutes after the plane touched down, Fox rose from his seat, stretching
briefly before disembarking. Waiting impatiently at the carousel, he finally
located his bags. Snatching them up, he made for the car rental booth. While he
waited his turn, he decided to try and give Alex a quick call.
Punching in his home number, he waited only two rings before Alex answered.
"Hello?"
"Hey, beautiful."
"Hi. Didn't expect to hear from you quite so soon."
"Well, I haven't left the airport yet. I'm in line right now for a car."
"Oh. Have a good flight?"
"Uneventful, which I guess is good. Know what?"
"What?"
"I miss you."
"I miss you too."
"What'd you do today?"
"Got the kitchen all straightened out. Started on the living room, but I didn't
finish. Got tired. I'll get back on it tomorrow."
"There's no rush, you know. Just take your time."
"I want to have it done, though, before you get back."
"Why? If it isn't done, I can help you finish."
"No," Alex argued softly. "I want it to look like home when you walk in."
"Baby, if you're there, it's home."
Alex smiled at the sweet admonition. Before he could say anything, Fox spoke
again.
"Hey, I'm next. I'll call you again when I'm settled in a motel, okay?"
"All right."
"Talk to you soon. Bye, babe."
"Bye."
Alex hung up and, looking around the apartment, decided to do just a little more
work before finding something for dinner.
Traffic on the boulevard was stop and go. Some fender bender up ahead as Fox
would later find out.
But the slow moving lines afforded him a long look at his target area. The same
place he'd first seen Alex all those months ago.
Things didn't look much different from when he'd been there before, but then
again, why would they? He just hoped the regulars were still there, and that the
asshole he was looking for was one of them.
Two hours later he was settled in his room. He'd managed to find a halfway
decent motel not far from Boy's Town, so he could walk over and not have to
worry about parking.
Unpacking his clothes, he pulled the square envelope out of the pocket at the
bottom of the bag. Rage bubbled up inside him as he looked at the first picture
of that son of a bitch fucking...raping his unconscious lover.
"I'm going to find you," he said softly to the man in the picture. "And you're
going to pay and pay for what you did to him."
Removing the tiny scissors from his shaving kit, he cut the picture in two,
keeping the half showing the fucker's likeness and shoving the other part back
into the envelope. Then he sat on the edge of the bed, forcing himself to
breathe deeply and evenly before he picked up his cell phone.
Alex sat quietly in the middle of his half-finished living room, barely touched
dinner on the coffee table before him. As if in a trance, he watched as the pair
of angelfish glided back and forth in the tank. They'd tolerated the trip well,
and now they were settled in their corner of the new living room, oblivious to
all but each other. A tiny smile slanted one corner of his mouth, and he rested
his cheek against the knuckles of one hand.
"You guys got it made, you know?"
The ringing phone startled him a bit, and it wasn't until the third ring that
he'd reached the phone and answered.
"Hello?"
"Guess who?"
Alex released a long breath, feeling better just hearing his lover's soft tone.
"Hey. You in your room?"
"Yeah. Such as it is. What're you up to?"
"Nothing, just finished eating, now I'm sitting here debating whether or not to
go to bed."
"It's..." Fox looked at his watch. "...only like...seven-thirty there. Are you
tired?"
"A little."
"You okay?"
"Yeah. I'm all right." Alex closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. "Just lonely."
"I know, baby. Me too. I promise I'll get this done as quickly as possible."
"You know, we didn't even really talk about this case. What's going on?"
He hadn't seen that coming.
"Umm. W...woman here in L.A. claims to have witnessed the very recent murder of
her twin brother who lived twenty miles away, even though she hasn't left her
house in almost eight months."
Oh my God, that just came out too easily.
"Hasn't left her house? You mean like, not even out the front door?"
"Nope. She weighs three hundred and fifty pounds and has chronic emphysema."
"Damn. So, you think this is some sort of psychic thing?"
"She described the murder in great detail, and the police investigating the
murder have confirmed what she's said. I don't know what else it can be."
"Okay, but...where do you come in?"
Yeah, Mulder, where do you...
"Blood."
"Huh?"
"Blood was found on some clothes of hers by the health care worker who visits
her three times a week. The woman innocently mentioned it to her while the
detectives were there, and bang. They took the clothes, had 'em analyzed and
came up with a match."
"It matched her brother's blood?"
"Yep."
"Well, Fox, I hate to say it but..."
"I don't think she did it, Alex. I believe there was some connection. Some deep,
extrasensory link between the two."
"Okay, but how do you explain the blood?"
"I don't know. I can tell you that it isn't unprecedented. I've seen something
similar before."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Well...good luck trying to prove she didn't do it. If the cops think they've
got enough evidence against her, you're gonna be hard pressed to get them to
listen to you."
"Story of my life," Fox sighed, hating how easily he was able to make Alex
believe lie after lie.
They talked for another twenty minutes or so, discussing more 'facts' of the
case and what Alex was thinking he'd like to do in the dining room, then
grudgingly agreed that it was time to say goodnight.
"I'll call you tomorrow as soon as I get time, okay?" Fox asked, feeling like
shit but trying like hell to keep it out of his tone.
"Okay," Alex rasped, pressing his face into the phone and closing his eyes. "Be
good."
"I will...Alex?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you so much."
"I love you, Fox. More than you can know."
"Goodnight, sweetheart."
"Goodnight."
Alex gripped the phone for long seconds before finally disconnecting and
dropping it down on the sofa beside him. His eyes drifted down to his watch.
Eight-fifteen.
Wonderful.
If he went to bed now, he'd be up every hour on the hour. Besides, he didn't
want to go to bed. Couldn't bring himself to lie there alone, missing Fox all
night.
He got up and looked around the room for a moment before pulling another box
into the middle of the floor.
So, he'd just get some more work done...and miss Fox all night.
Green eyes splashed with gold stared at the image in the mirror as he tucked the
fine mesh, body hugging black shirt into the waistband of skintight jeans. His
hands ran slowly through his hair, watching as a few stubborn golden-brown
strands fell back into his eyes, and he thought to himself that if he dressed
this way at home, he'd never make it out of the apartment. Alex would attack him
long before he reached the door.
A smile flickered unbidden across his face.
Maybe he'd buy more clothes like this before he left.
This stuff, he'd burn.
Checking his weapon and securing it in his ankle holster, he exited the motel
room and headed out toward his destination.
Alex sat up, peering at the clock and cursing softly.
Four-ten.
He'd finally gone to bed at two, having squared the living room away and started
on the bathroom. When exhaustion forced him to stop, he took a long, warm shower
then crawled between the sheets, hoping to drop off quickly. Which he did. But
only for about an hour. He'd been awake since then, tossing and turning, trying
to find a comfortable position. The attempt proved futile, and now he sat there,
staring into the darkness and wishing to God that Fox hadn't had to go away just
one day after they'd moved in.
Not that he would have felt any differently six months from now. But at least he
would have had that much time to try and get his shit together so he could cope
a little better.
"Okay, come on. Knock it off and go to sleep. You're beat, so just close your
eyes and let it come."
Lying on his side, he pulled one of Fox's pillows to his chest and buried his
face in its softness.
"Mmmm."
Still smelled like him.
Alex felt his cock begin to rise as images of the two of them making love last
night drifted into his head.
Fox had taken all his time, insuring that no inch of him went unattended to, and
when he'd finally given in to Alex's hoarse cries for fulfillment, he did so
with a tenderness that left the younger man stunned and lingering in a state of
exquisite satisfaction.
And tonight he was alone. Restless and hungry for the love that only one man
would ever be able to give him.
Whimpering softly, he pressed his face deeper into the pillow and waited for
morning.
"Hey, sexy."
A cool, gilded gaze turned and rested on the man directly to Fox's left.
"I seen you earlier. Lookin' for some company?"
"What makes you think that?"
"You been out here for hours."
"And have you seen anybody pick me up?"
"Nope. Seen lots of guys try, though. I figured you were just picky. You
wouldn't think that the hookers around here would be, but a few are. 'Specially
the ones as gorgeous as you. They know they can get the big bucks, and they hold
out for it."
Fox said nothing.
"So...how much for a blow job?"
"You couldn't afford me."
"Try me."
Ignoring the comment, Fox turned his attention back to traffic.
"I don't get it," the other man huffed. "If you aren't selling, what the fuck're
you doing out here?"
"Minding my damn business. Now go away."
The man shuffled off finally, muttering curses under his breath, but at least
he'd left peacefully.
Fox watched as the man moved on to the next hustler and, within thirty seconds
time was leading his catch for the night away. Shaking his head, he turned back
to the street, searching the crowd.
It was after midnight, and activity had only increased since he'd arrived
several hours ago.
He closed his eyes briefly, giving himself only a moment's rest before resuming
his quest.
Christ. Twelve-twenty. That meant it was almost dawn back home.
And Alex was asleep.
Alone in the bed they would be sharing right now, were it not for this
cocksucker he was tracking.
And his camera man.
And Scully.
And to a lesser degree, Skinner.
Right now, at this particular point in time, he would have killed them all if
they'd been there in front of him. He was so fucking tired. And frustrated. And
pissed...and missing Alex so much that it had become an actual, physical ache.
Damn, he wanted to be home. He should be home. Watching, in a few hours as those
insanely long eyelashes lifted, and sleepy, green eyes attempted to focus on his
face. His heart swelling as those perfect, bowed lips curved up into a sweet
smile, and that honey and gravel voice bid him a soft good morning...
Oh yeah, right now he wanted to kill them all.
"S'cuse me."
"Get the fuck out of my sight."
The prospective customer slunk away at the hissed command, and Fox gave himself
a mental shake.
Come on, Mulder, get a grip. What if the asshole you're looking for walks up
to you, and you react like that before you even realize it's him? Take it easy.
That's it. Deep breaths. At least try to look approachable.
In a combined effort to stretch his legs and clear his head, he decided to walk
a bit. Half an hour later, he dropped down onto the nearest bench and waited.
Four hours and not an ounce of luck later, he picked himself up and started back
for the motel. A good night's...morning's sleep, and he'd start again.
Alex stood before the first of the two bedroom closets, studying the order of
Fox's clothing. Shirts, neatly hung by color, spaced enough so that they
wouldn't wrinkle. Suits organized similarly. Casual wear hung on the other side
of the spacious wardrobe, and shoes and sneakers lined up on the shelves above.
Satisfied with his work, he shut the door and started in on his own closet. A
quarter way through, he stopped and looked again at his watch.
Twenty minutes after two.
Ten-twenty, California time.
He'd expected that Fox would have called him by now.
Maybe I should try him.
No, don't. He'll think something's wrong. As soon as he gets the chance, you
know he'll call.
The 'chance' came some forty minutes later.
Alex dove for the ringing phone and lifted it quickly to his ear.
"Hello?"
"..Hi, babe. Sorry I didn't call you earlier," Fox began immediately. I had an
unexpected meeting, so I was caught off guard and..."
"It's okay," Alex interrupted, not exactly sure why he didn't want to hear the
rest of it. "I'm just glad to hear from you. How'd you sleep? You sound kind of
tired."
"I am. This four-hour difference really screws you up. And I had a hell of a
time sleeping without you. How 'bout you?"
"I miss you, but I'm okay."
"You sure?"
"Yeah, I...it's just lonely here without you."
"I'm sorry, baby."
"It's all right, Fox," Alex promised. "It's nothing you can help. You've got a
job to do."
Not knowing how to respond to that, Fox changed the subject.
"What're you doing?"
"Just finished arranging all your clothes in your closet. I'm working on mine
now."
Fox emitted a soft sigh. "Why do I get the feeling you've got the whole
apartment all straightened out already?"
"Not quite. A good part of it."
"Alex..."
"Well, I hate having this stuff scattered all over the place, so I did a little
more work last night. Speaking of work..."
"Yeah, I...I just wanted to check in with you since I hadn't yet this morning.
Has uh...has Skinner come over yet to borrow a cup of sugar?"
"Nope. He won't come down here."
"I didn't think so either, but I thought I'd check. Well, I guess I'd better get
back to work now. I'll call you a little later, okay?"
"Okay. I don't think I'm going anywhere. Store maybe, but that'll probably be
about it. So, if you don't catch me home, you can call my cell."
"All right. Talk to you later. Love you."
"Love you, too."
"Bye, babe."
"Bye."
Alex put the phone down and stood scratching the back of his head, trying to
figure out what it was in Fox's voice that made him believe that something was
up.
Nothing, he told himself. He's jet lagged, and he misses you.
Going back to his closet, he began again to arrange his clothing. Five minutes
later, he stopped. Before he could really think about what he was doing, he
picked up the phone and dialed.
"Skinner."
"Sorry to bother you at the office. It's Alex."
"Krycek?"
No, Trebek.
"Yeah."
"What can I do for you?"
"I'd like to talk to you."
"Umm...all right. I'll be home in about two hours. Unless it can't wait."
"N-no, two hours is okay, I guess."
"All right, then. I'll uh...I'll stop by on my way up to my place."
"Okay. Thanks."
"Krycek?"
"Yeah?"
"Is everything all right?"
"Yeah, I...it..it's probably nothing."
Oh, what the hell's going on here?
"All right, I'll see you in a while."
"'Kay."
Skinner heard the click signaling Alex's disconnection, and he set his phone
down. Sitting quietly for a few minutes, he contemplated the possible reasons
for Krycek's call.
Mulder was okay. If he wasn't, Krycek wouldn't be waiting until he got home to
tell him. But what the hell else would make Alex call him?
Trying to put it out of his mind, he went back to work. But less than half an
hour later he put down the file he'd been reading and leaned back in his chair,
drumming loudly on his desk. Minutes after that, he grabbed his jacket and keys
and, with a few brief instruction to his secretary, he headed for home.
A little early to go back out.
Fox lay sprawled on the double bed in his motel room, staring blindly at the
television.
He couldn't call Alex; he was supposed to be working.
This was all that was left to do.
He reached over to the small night table and lifted the picture he couldn't stop
looking at.
"Where are you, you fucking son of a bitch?" he asked the picture. "You're here,
I can feel it. Show your sorry ass."
Fox dropped his hand to his side and, still clutching the photograph, he turned
a blank gaze on the television.
The doorbell sounded, startling Alex out of his thoughts.
Who the hell could be at the door? It was too early for Skinner.
Walking over to the entrance, he checked the peephole.
But Skinner it was.
He unlocked the door and swung it open, staring silently.
"I know, I'm early," Skinner said by way of a greeting. "But I couldn't help
thinking that something was wrong, and if I didn't get over here to find out
what was going on and try to help, Mulder would have my head on a skewer."
Lowering his eyes, Alex stepped aside and allowed the other man to enter.
"You've done a lot of work," Skinner commented, looking around the pristine
living room. "Looks great."
"Thanks." Alex motioned to the sofa. "Have a seat."
Skinner lowered himself to the cushions and waited. Alex took a seat in the
chair across from him and looked down at his folded hands.
"What is this case about?"
"I'm sorry?"
Alex lifted his eyes to the other man's. "This case you sent Fox on. What's it
about?"
Shit, shit, shit. Okay, he's watching you. Think of something, and make it
good.
"I can't discuss the case with you, Krycek, I..."
"That's former Special Agent Krycek."
Skinner quickly averted his eyes. How could he have forgotten that he wasn't
talking to some ignorant civilian, whom he could easily get over on?
"I'll save you the trauma of trying to think something up," Alex said softly. "I
know Fox isn't in L.A. on any case."
Great. How was he going to pull this out of the fire?
"Krycek, I don't know what you think..."
"Up until a very few minutes ago, I was thinking that it was my imagination that
Fox seemed to be acting sort of weird, and that I was just worrying too much.
Now I'm leaning the other way." He pitched forward, staring at the other man. "I
think Fox is in California for reasons other than this trumped up case. I think
it's something I wouldn't be at all happy about, or he wouldn't feel the need to
lie to me. I think that if he's doing something dangerous and something happens
to him..." For a moment, Skinner saw a glimmer of the old Krycek. "...I'm
thinking I'll have to kill you."
"You know what Iım thinking?" Skinner asked. "I'm thinking I'd have to be insane
to even consider being friends with a couple of men, who seem to threaten my
life on a weekly basis."
No response.
"Have you confronted him?"
"No."
"Shouldn't he be the one you talk to about these suspicions of yours?"
"If he went to the trouble of making up a case for my benefit, I don't really
think he'd just break down and tell me the truth because I asked him. Now, if
he's in any danger, I want to know, and I want to know right fucking now."
"I'm sure he's fine."
Alex's patience began to quickly wear. "That's not what I asked."
"Krycek..."
"You do know something, don't you?" Alex jerked himself out of his chair.
"Dammit, Skinner, tell me why he's out there!"
"Just give him a couple more days..."
"The fuck I will!" Alex shouted, tolerance finally lost. "I want to know what
the hell's going on!"
"I promised him, Krycek. As a friend. You can't ask me to go back on my word."
"I'm not asking you," Alex snarled. "Now, is he in any kind of danger?"
Skinner pressed his hands to his face and sighed into them.
"Possibly."
"Possibly," Alex repeated.
"Yes. It's... it's possible. But if he's careful and..."
Alex leaned down, planting his hands against the sofa, on either side of
Skinner's head.
"For the last time, what the fuck's he doing there?"
"Looking for someone."
The bad feeling Alex had started to get, got worse.
"Who?"
"The man who had drugged and...the one who Scully brought out from California."
Alex's breath left him in a rush.
"Son of a bitch."
"I told him it was a bad idea. I asked him not to go, but you know Mulder when
he's on a mission. He's about as easy to stop as a rabid pitbull."
"So, he's gone to L.A. to try and find this asshole. I can't believe this. How
would he even know where to start?"
"I guess he figures he'll go to the most likely place. The place where he'd
found you."
"What makes him think this guy is there?"
"You knew him, Krycek. He was a...a customer."
Alex's eyes lowered to the floor. "I don't remember."
"You did something to this man. He's got a permanent limp as a result. Does that
help?"
Alex raked his fingers through his hair, trying to associate the face he'd seen
in the pictures with any of the assholes he'd taught a lesson to.
"I think..." It was coming to him. "Initials."
"What?"
"His name. It was just...A.J. That's it. I remember him now. He got what was
coming to him."
"Be that as it may, he was ticked off enough about what you did to him to want
revenge."
Changing the subject a bit, Alex went back to Fox.
"I still don't understand how Fox thinks he's going to find this jerk. He'd been
looking at those pictures for all of thirty seconds before I took them away."
"He has some."
"I got rid of all those pictures," Alex snapped, picking up on Skinner's last
words. "Where would Fox get more?"
"He..." Another sigh. "He asked me to get Scully's pictures from her. So I got
them. And the negatives."
Alex backed away from the sofa and tilted his head back, eyes shut.
"This thing has been gnawing a hole in him," Skinner informed the other man. "He
absolutely refuses to let it go until the man who assaulted you pays for what
he's done. What could I say to him? I've thought about it a lot, and if I were
in Mulder's place, I wouldn't rest until that bastard got what was coming to
him."
"Got what was coming to him..." Alex whispered. "What does that mean?"
"He didn't go into detail, and I really thought it best that I not know."
"If it had happened to him," Alex reasoned, "I'd never be able to make that
fucker be dead enough. Jesus, what if Fox is out there to...why else would he go
all the way across the country?"
"Maybe you shouldn't ask yourself such questions," Skinner advised.
"I have to." He turned a frightened gaze to Skinner. "I understand how he feels.
But he's out there alone. So much could happen to him." He turned frightened
eyes to Skinner. "I can't let anything happen to him."
"He'll be all right, Alex. Mulder is well able to take care of himself..."
While Skinner talked, Alex paced. Seconds later, he snatched up the phone and
tried Fox's cell number. All he got was the voice mail message.
"He's not answering," Alex said softly, then paced a few more steps before
stopping to snatch up the phone book.
"Who're you calling?"
"Airport."
"What for?"
"For the next flight out to L.A."
"Krycek, wait."
"For what? For something to happen to him?"
"Krycek, you're not thinking rationally. Mulder's going to call you. And when he
keeps getting no answer, he's going to call me. And when he gets no answer
there..."
"Why wouldn't he get an answer from you?" Alex asked quickly.
"Because if you insist on going out there, I'm going with you."
"No, you're not. I'll find him myself."
"In your state? No. I'm going with you whether you like it or not."
"You're a little late with the concern bit, Skinner," Alex rasped. "You should
have been concerned when Fox told you about this. You should have made him stay.
Or if you couldn't, you should have told me, so I could've put a stop to it."
"Whether you choose to believe it or not, I am concerned. About the both of
you," Skinner argued. "And if you insist on going out there, I will not let you
go alone."
Alex simply glared at the other man.
"But listen to this," Skinner reasoned. "If Mulder calls you, which he will, and
then calls me, and he gets no answer from either of us, he's going to hop the
first flight back home, you know he is. And what'll happen? You'll end up
missing each other. Now, does that make any sense to do?"
Alex blew out a desperate sigh.
"I can't just sit here," he replied, his voice taking on a softer, more anxious
edge. "I have to do something."
"I don't see any other choice at the moment," Skinner informed the younger man.
"Give him a little time."
"Time..." Alex paced slowly, talking to himself. "What if there's no time left?
Jesus Christ," he whispered. "My fault. It's all my..."
Skinner slid to the edge of the sofa, struggling to hear the younger man's
pained whispers.
"Krycek...Alex. None of what happened to you that night is your fault. You were
at home, minding your own business..."
"My business," Alex said flatly, "is what started it. If I'd never been out in
L.A. whoring, there'd be no one for Fox to be hunting down." He turned back to
Skinner. "What if he does find him?"
Skinner answered with telling silence.
"Jesus Christ." Alex dropped heavily into the chair he'd vacated earlier, and
buried his face in his hands.
After a long silence, he lifted his head and focused a glassy-eyed stare on the
floor between them.
"I'd thought about finding and killing him myself. But after a while it...I
don't know, I just stopped. Fox had talked about getting information on his
whereabouts from Scully, and I begged him to leave it alone. I wanted to forget
it." He looked away. "I just wanted to forget."
"Mulder couldn't forget," Skinner murmured. "He loves you with a passion I've
rarely seen, and he couldn't live with allowing what that man did to you to go
unanswered."
"There were a few instances where he's felt as though he's failed me," Alex
explained in a rough whisper.
"All the more reason, then, for him to not let this go," Skinner replied almost
as softly.
Alex nodded. "I'd grown so tired," he said flatly. "Weary of always having to
watch my own back. Sick to death of the kind of life I'd led for so many years.
Fox saw how tired I was. He wanted to take care of me. He asked me to trust him
and...and just let go. It was hard to do at first, though I wanted to so much.
But I...I think I learned," he said in a tone laced with uncertainty. "And every
time something bad happened, he took it to heart. Placed all the blame on
himself for not being able to prevent it.
"Nothing was his fault." His eyelids lowered halfway, and his voice took on a
soft, adoring tone. "He's been so good to me...attentive and sweet and..." His
eyes rose to the other man's face, willing him to understand. "...perfect."
Not knowing what to say, Skinner sat quietly and let Alex go on.
"It's not right. I've put him through so much, and he's still in hell. He
doesn't deserve this. Any of it. If I could go back and change it, I would. I
wouldn't come back with him. I'd make him forget me and come back to his life."
"It was out of your hands and his, the first day he saw you out there," Skinner
informed the younger man. "This thing between you...this relationship...it's
beyond logic or control. It's your destiny to be together. Fate, Alex, will not
let you be apart."
"It would put him through the shit he's suffered?"
"Somehow I'm sure Mulder doesn't see it that way."
Alex again threw himself out of his seat.
"He's in Los Angeles looking for a man who'd drugged and fucked me in his bed,"
he growled through clenched teeth. "And if he finds him, he'll kill him. You
don't think that's shit?"
"Yes," Skinner hissed. "As far as I'm concerned, it's some of the worst kind of
shit. But you don't know for absolutely sure what he intends to do any more than
I do. Now, I think you would do well to stop speculating." His tone gentled.
"I'm so sorry that you have to go through this, but good things are waiting for
you both and the other end. Trust Mulder to take you to them."
"I can't..." Alex sighed. "I can't think that far ahead. All I can think of
right now is how afraid I am of what's going on out there. And how much I wish
he would call and tell me that he's all right." Alex walked over to the window
then looked down at his watch. Shifting his focus to the view, he pounded his
fist lightly and repeatedly on the sill.
"Come on, Fox. Please call me."
Almost three hours and nothing.
Fox had scrutinized every sorry bastard who'd approached him, and no one fit the
description of the man in the photo.
As he sat wondering how long he could stay out here before seriously
jeopardizing his sanity as well as Alex's, someone tapped his shoulder. He
looked up, and his pulse immediately began to race.
Dead man at two o'clock.
Quickly resuming his cool, he fixed a steely gaze on the other man.
"Yeah?"
"Hey, pretty eyes. How'd you like a little company?"
The golden-brown head cocked to one side.
"My companionship isn't free."
"I didn't think it was," the other answered, taking a sip from the paper bag
covered bottle he held. "Don't worry, I got cash," he assured Fox, now staring
at the succulent lips. "Anybody ever tell you that you got the sexiest mouth
goin'?"
"Yeah. And everybody who has was looking for something."
"Yeah? Like what?"
"The blowjob of their lives."
The man moistened his lips at the thought and took a drink.
"And did they get it?"
"That's what they said...after they came to."
"Fuck. How much?"
"Hundred."
"Damn."
"If you don't agree with my price, move on. I'm sure there are plenty other guys
out here who'll do it for less."
"Yeah, but none of them have a mouth that looks like yours. Shit. Okay. Okay,
let's go." He thrust the bag at Fox. "Want some?"
"No."
He shrugged, took another long swallow then started to move away.
Fox rose from his seat and sauntered along behind the man as he limped down the
street. Fists jammed into his pockets, he willed himself to remain calm. One
wrong move, and he could scare the asshole away. He needed to get him alone. And
then...
"You know, you look familiar."
"...Yeah?"
"Yeah. Somethin' about you." The man laughed. "Probably seen you in my dreams."
Christ, is this the corny shit Alex put up with night after night?
They reached a rundown building only a few blocks away from where Fox had been,
and he looked around, surveying the place as they approached the door. They
entered the building, and the man led the way to another door in the dilapidated
hall marked with the number three, in what looked like magic marker. He unlocked
the door and entered first, Fox following slowly as he looked around. Once
inside, he shut the door and leaned against it, watching the other man smile
broadly.
"Goddamn you're pretty. You know how hard it is to find somethin' other than
skinny, greasy little shits out there? You must be kinda new around here."
Fox crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the other man.
"You mean there's nobody else around here who would give me a run for my money?
Maybe I should go up a little on my prices."
"Hey," the other laughed. "Forget I said it."
"Seriously, is there nobody else out here who attracts a lot of business?"
"Nope. Used to be, but he's gone." He stopped then started again, almost smiling
at the memory.
"Gorgeous bastard. Dark hair and the greenest eyes I ever seen. Different mouth
than yours, but still really nice. He was a fuckin' demon, though."
"How so?"
"He was just..." The man paused as he started to undo his jeans. "...He was an
evil fucker. Did a number on some people. He gave me this limp."
"Really. For no reason?"
"None that I could see," the man lied. "The dude was just nasty. People like
that get what's comin' to 'em, though." He dropped his pants and underwear and
sat down on the sagging bed in the middle of the room, spreading his legs. "Come
here, baby. On your knees."
"Aren't you forgetting something?" Fox asked, removing his jacket and shirt, but
not moving an inch toward the other man.
"Oh yeah."
Reaching down into his pants, the man counted off several bills and laid them on
the bed beside him. When Fox still made no move toward him, he sighed and pulled
a condom out of the same pocket. When he'd pulled it from its enclosure and
rolled it onto his cock, he smiled and crooked his index finger at the other.
"Now. Get over here. I want to see those pretty lips wrapped around my dick in
the next twenty seconds."
"Well," Fox said softly, reaching down to lift one leg of his jeans. "That's
really too bad."
The man on the bed released a horrified gasp as a gun was suddenly pointed
directly at his head.
"What...what the fuck are you doing?"
Fox stepped closer, changing his aim to the man's crotch and his quickly
deflating cock.
"What's your name?"
"Uh...A...A.J."
"Let me introduce myself, A.J. My name is Fox. And I want something from you."
"What?" A.J. croaked, shaking violently. "Just tell me what, man. You can have
whatever."
Fox nodded and stood calmly before the other man, again aiming at his head.
"Retribution."
"For what? I don't even know you!"
"That's true. But you've fucked around with someone I love very much."
"What? Who?"
"The evil bastard who gave you that limp."
And suddenly it came to him.
"Shit. Oh, shit, shit, shit."
"Yes?"
"The picture. There was a picture of the two of you on the dresser."
Golden-brown eyebrows arched sharply. "Oh? So, you have seen me before?"
"Listen man, I'm sorry. That chick. That redheaded chick made me do it. I didn't
want to..." He began to sob as Fox released the safety on his weapon. "No,
please! I didn't wanna, I swear."
"You're a lying piece of shit, you know that A.J.?"
"I'm not lyin', man, I swear to Christ."
"And sacrilegious to boot." Fox shook his head. "For shame."
The half naked man had no time for any more argument. Fox was on him in an
instant. Securing his weapon, he used the butt of it to inflict a vicious
beating on him. And he didn't stop until nothing short of dental records or DNA
tests would identify him.
Drawing himself up to his full height, Fox cast a cold glare down at the dead
man.
It was done. He hadn't failed Alex. Not this time. His lover had been horribly
wronged, and he'd taken care of it. His only regrets were that punishment hadn't
come more swiftly, and that he'd never be able to find the dead bastard's
shutterbug friend. He'd hoped that they'd have been together, but he was a
reasonable man, and he realized he couldn't have everything. At least he'd
gotten the son of a bitch who'd actually raped Alex. That, he told himself was
the most important thing.
Slowly, he turned away from the still form on the bed and walked into the
bathroom. After he'd finished removing all traces of the man's blood from
himself and the sink, he put his shirt and jacket on and moved back toward the
bed. Taking the man's wallet and the money he'd left, Fox slipped unseen out of
the room and the building.
"I can't do any more of this waiting," Alex announced, breaking the long silence
that had descended upon the room. "I'm going crazy here. He should have called
me by now, he should have..."
Before Skinner could interrupt, the phone rang. Alex fell on it, jerking the
receiver to his ear.
"Fox?"
"Yeah. Hi babe. What's wrong? Why do you sound wide awake? You should have been
asleep."
"I've been waiting to hear from you."
"I'm sorry, sweetheart, but I wanted to work straight through so I could get a
flight out tonight."
"A...you're coming home?"
"Yeah. I'm at the airport now. My flight's in just a few minutes...Alex? You
there?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm here."
"I'll be home by noon your time tomorrow. I thought you'd be glad."
"Fox," Alex breathed into the phone. "You...God, you have no idea."
"Did something happen?" Fox asked anxiously. "Are you all right?"
"Nothing happened," the younger man breathed. "Just...get here."
"I'm on my way, baby. They're calling my flight now. I'll see you soon, okay?"
"Okay."
"I love you."
Alex's fingers tightened on the phone, and he forced himself to keep it
together.
"Love you too."
"Gotta go. Go to bed now, okay?"
Alex nodded, unable to speak anymore, and he disconnected but retained his death
grip on the phone as his legs gave out on him, and he sank down onto the sofa.
"He's on his way home?" Skinner asked, trying to gently wrestle the phone away
from the other man.
Alex nodded again, closing his eyes and trembling uncontrollably.
"Good. Okay. Come on now, Alex. Breathe. It's all right. He's okay, and he's
heading home."
He watched as the younger man continued to shake and decided that maybe a drink
would calm him.
Rising from the sofa, he went into the kitchen and foraged around in the neatly
organized cupboards until he found what he was looking for. He located a glass
and poured a healthy amount of brandy into it. Deciding he could use a drink
himself, he poured another then took both glasses into the living room, where he
found Alex exactly where he'd left him.
"Here," he said softly, nudging Alex's hand with one of the glasses. When the
other man made no move to take it, he sat down and placed his own glass on the
table beside the couch.
"Alex, come on. Take this. He took Alex's hand, noting that it was freezing, and
forced the glass into it. "Drink some of that."
Satisfied that the younger man had sipped at some of the liquor, he got up again
and wandered into the bedroom, where he found a light blanket lying over the
back of the room's only chair. Pulling it over his arm, he returned to Alex and
draped the throw over his shoulders.
"Better?"
Clutching the glass, Alex held it against his lips and said nothing.
"Why don't you get some sleep?"
"Can't. I can't."
"You have to. You have to pick Mulder up at the airport, right? You can't do
that if you're falling asleep at the wheel."
Alex looked up at the older man, a sudden realization hitting him.
"I forgot...he didn't..."
"What?"
"Flight number. I don't know it."
"You know the airline and the time though, right?"
Alex nodded.
"No problem then. But you have to get some sleep. Unless you want me to pick him
up."
"No. I have to be there when he gets off the plane."
"Then you have to drink a little more of that brandy and then get to
bed...Alex?"
"Do you think he found him?"
"What?"
"Do you think Fox found him?"
"I don't know," Skinner answered honestly. "How did he sound?"
"Like nothing was up. Except that he was worried about me."
"Hmm. Well, if I had to guess, I'd say that he did whatever he'd set out to do.
I think if he'd failed, you'd have heard it in his voice."
Alex closed his eyes and laid his head against the back of the sofa.
"That's what Iım afraid of. If he killed that guy, it will have been because of
me. I'll have turned him into a killer. That's my M.O., not his."
"Whoa, wait a minute...hang on," Skinner broke in. "let me tell you something
Iım pretty sure you already know, but might have forgotten when you went all
sappy over Mulder. That man is the most stubborn, single minded, passionate
lunatic I've ever known. No one makes him do anything, and no one can stop him
once he's taken up a cause.
"Mulder marches to the beat of his own drummer, and nothing you did or didn't do
had any bearing on what he's done in the past forty-eight hours. This wouldn't
be the first time he's been pushed way around the bend, and if circumstances
ever warrant it again, it won't be the last. I speak not as his boss or his
judge, but as his friend, who's pulled his own share of jail sentence worthy
stunts for the good of those I care about."
Slightly more comforted by Skinner's vow of 'understanding', Alex countered
softly.
"If he didn't love me, he wouldn't have given the slightest bit of thought to
killing that asshole."
"That part is true. But Alex, you didn't make Mulder fall in love with you. He
came up with that wild idea all by himself."
Alex shifted a half-hearted glare in Skinner's direction.
"You've admitted yourself that you can't understand how it is he loves you the
way he does."
Tired, dark eyes slid away from Skinner's face and came to rest on the glass
held between Alex's hands.
Skinner watched his own fingers tracing disjointed designs on his knee. His next
words were as much for himself as they were for Alex.
"And nothing that you or anyone else does or says or thinks is going to make him
stop loving you."
"I don't know whether to be scared or thrilled about that. I guess I'm a lot of
both."
"What's to be afraid of?"
"I love Fox like I never dreamed I could love anyone," Alex said, shocked that
he would open up this way to Skinner of all people. "I didn't think I had this
much in me. I've hurt him so much...I don't want to hurt him any more."
"Aren't you afraid of being hurt, yourself?"
Alex gave the older man a pained smile.
"I hurt all the time," he rasped in answer. "Because I know he deserves so much
better than what I am. He deserves a better life than the one he's had with me.
He won't see it, though. It's like he's wearing blinders that he absolutely
refuses to take off."
"Maybe it's you who should take your blinders off."
Aside from the puzzled crease between his eyebrows, Alex gave no response.
"I called Mulder a lunatic a few minutes ago," Skinner explained. "Crazy doesn't
equal stupid. There's a world of difference there. Mulder knows who you are. He
knows who you were and what you've done. And he loves you. Maybe it's time you
stopped seeing yourself the way you think he should see you, and just be happy."
"If it was that fucking easy, don't you think I would have done it by now?" Alex
asked, irritated by Skinner's offer of such a simple solution.
"You won't let yourself do it," Skinner pressed, becoming a bit annoyed,
himself. "You've been the bad guy for so long...the despicable low-life that
everyone hates, that you've gotten comfortable with it. Lazy. No labor
involved..."
What the hell are you doing?
He couldn't stop himself. He was on a roll, and wherever this took him, he was
going to see it through to the end.
"If you're going to turn all that around and be the man you know Mulder
deserves, you're going to have to work at it. And you've been working so hard
for so long, you don't want to do it any more, do you? You'd rather sit on your
ass and whine about your problems instead of standing up and fighting for what
you want."
Alex sat blinking, knocked back by the force of Skinner's words.
"Mulder's coddled you too much. I mean, I realize that you might be a bit more
vulnerable than you used to be, and with good reason. And I guess it must be
nice to have someone baby and make a fuss over you for possibly the first time
in your life. But I think it's gone too far. You know, one of your more
admirable traits even when I hated you was your nerve. Your unwillingness to let
anything get in the way of whatever the hell you wanted. Come on, Krycek, where
is it? Where's the audacity and self-confidence that everyone who knew and
despised you respected? I see flashes of it every so often. I know it's there."
Receiving no answer, Skinner crossed his arms over his chest and stared
pointedly at the younger man.
"Well?"
Alex maintained a heavy-lidded stare for long seconds before responding.
"You're lucky I'm too damn tired to shoot you."
"Tell you what. You can shoot me tomorrow if you still want to. But for now, go
get some rest."
Alex rose unsteadily to feet and started toward the kitchen. Stopping, he turned
around and looked toward Skinner.
"You gonna finish that?"
Skinner glanced from Alex down to the drink in his hand. Shrugging, he downed
the rest of the brandy and got to his feet. Starting toward Alex, he held his
hand out.
"I'll take that. You go to bed."
"You're not going to leave them in the sink, are you?" Alex asked, holding his
glass out of Skinner's reach.
"Is my last name Mulder?" Skinner countered, surprising Alex by quickly
snatching the glass from his hand. "Now, get to bed."
"My father died a long time ago, Skinner."
"Look I'm just trying to keep you from wrapping your car around a pole on your
way to the airport. That's hardly the welcome home either of us wants for
Mulder. In fact, you know, I think I'll drive you."
Too tired to squabble, Alex started toward the bedroom.
Surprised that he didn't have to argue his point further, Skinner walked into
the kitchen and washed the glasses. Locating a dishtowel, he dried and put them
away, then made his way to the bedroom, where Alex was lying, eyes closed, one
pillow clutched to his chest and his head resting on another. Skinner leaned
against the doorframe, studying the other man for all of ten seconds then he
spoke.
"I'm not buying it, Krycek."
"I'm trying to sleep," Alex droned, not opening his eyes, "but I'm not going to
get very far if you stand there bugging me."
"Okay. I'm going." Skinner pushed away from the frame and took only two steps
before Alex called to him.
"Skinner."
"What?"
"...Thanks."
Skinner grunted his acknowledgement and again attempted to leave.
"Skinner?"
"What?"
Alex opened his eyes and stared at the older man. "How do you do that?"
Skinner shook his head in total confusion.
"That talking but not moving your jaw thing."
Skinner heaved an exasperated sigh, but Alex persisted.
"Seriously. I've wondered for years."
"I was kicked in the jaw by a goat."
"A goat."
"Yeah."
"You don't strike me as a farm boy."
"I wasn't. Which probably explains why I got kicked."
"When did it happen? How did it happen?"
"Back in seventy. Vietnam. I was out on patrol with a few members of my platoon
one night, and we came across this tiny village. There was a goat tied outside
one of the huts, and we decided to steal a little milk. One of the guys held his
helmet under it while another tried to milk it. It kept moving around, so I got
behind it to hold it steady, and it got ticked off I guess, and kicked me square
on the right side of my jaw. The bone wasn't shattered, so it wasn't considered
any type of medical emergency. I stayed in the field, and sooner or later it
healed on its own, though not properly. It doesn't hurt, but it's always stayed
a little stiff."
Skinner's head snapped up as he heard the barely suppressed snickers of the man
on the bed.
"Glad I could amuse you."
"Sorry," Alex apologized, holding up one hand. "But how stupid can you get?"
"What do you want from a bunch of nineteen and twenty-year olds?" Skinner looked
at his watch. "You realize, don't you that it's almost five o'clock. If you got
to sleep right now, you'll get about five hours before you have to get up."
The smile faded from Alex's face, and his gaze drifted down to the mattress.
"Yeah, I know. Just don't know if I can. At least talking keeps my mind
occupied...sort of."
"Sleeping'll keep it completely occupied."
No answer.
"Just think of this...in a few hours Mulder'll be home."
"And he'll have had time to think about what it is he's done. And why. And it'll
sicken him. And he'll begin to resent me because..."
"Oh, for the love of...don't start this again, Krycek."
Alex sighed softly and stared down at the point in the room where floor met
wall.
"Go to sleep," Skinner commanded, not as gruffly as he might have liked. "You'll
feel better with a few hours of rest."
Alex nodded, and Skinner walked away, moving slowly to the door. Exiting the
apartment, he closed the door softly behind him and leaned against the wall.
Damn, the boy was fucked up.
Of course, they all were.
Look at the life Krycek had lived up till now. Living in the shadows like one of
Mulder's mutant freaks. Killing, double crossing, stealing...hooking...
Scully...
Going to the lengths she had for a roll in the hay with Krycek. Maybe all those
years of following Mulder to the ends of the earth and not having even a hint of
a personal life had finally pushed her over the edge.
And Mulder.
Living most of his life like some sort of deranged hermit. Sleeping on his couch
when he had a perfectly good bedroom...spending every waking minute
investigating alien abductions and government conspiracies and lake monsters
named Big Blue.
And himself.
Spending what should have been prime ladder-climbing time signing off on his
wayward agent's outrageous escapades. Covering his ass when he should have been
canning it. Turning in the other direction when he knew damn well what was going
to go down in Los Angeles, and spending an entire evening trying to comfort said
agent's neurotic, ex-triple agent, ex-hooker boyfriend while his dick insisted
quite strenuously that he chuck the good neighbor bullshit and just jump the
man.
Yep. Fucked up, the whole lot of them.
Groaning to himself, Skinner pushed away from the wall and started toward the
elevator, calculating the longest he could possibly sleep before he and Krycek
would have to leave for the airport.
Three hours, and he'd be on the ground.
Fox closed his eyes and smiled.
Home.
A new home. Someplace where he and Alex could hopefully start clean. Speaking of
clean...
First thing he'd do when they got home after the airport would be to strip both
Alex and himself naked and get into a warm, soothing shower with him. God, if he
concentrated, he could feel Alex's gentle, soapy hands on him, washing and
teasing. Mouth brushing the thrashing pulse in his throat as he pulled his
beautiful, drenched lover closer...
"I'm sorry sir, did you say something?"
Fox opened his eyes and glanced up at the flight attendant. Giving the woman a
startled look, he shook his head.
"No, I...I suppose I talk to myself from time to time," he explained, wondering
what the hell it was that he'd said to draw her attention.
The woman gave him an understanding smile and moved on, leaving him gratefully
alone with his thoughts.
Alex bolted into a sitting position, slamming his hand down on the alarm clock
as it shrilled its warning.
When the hell had he set it?
And when the hell had he finally fallen asleep?
Couldn't have been all that long ago; he still felt like shit.
But Fox would be home in two hours, and then he'd feel a whole lot
better...maybe.
Dragging himself out of bed, he took a warm shower then rinsed off under a very
cool spray to try and snap himself out of the stupor he still lingered in.
Now awake but anxious as hell, he dried himself, slipped on a pair of
comfortable jeans and t-shirt, then came back into the bedroom and began making
the bed. The bell rang before he could finish, and he shuffled into the living
room and opened the door.
"You look like hell," Skinner said by way of greeting.
"Great. Thanks."
"Ready to go?"
"Let me just finish making the bed."
Not waiting for an answer, Alex retreated to the bedroom.
Skinner shut the door behind him and walked over to the fish tank. Watching the
angelfish for only a few minutes before Alex returned, he spun slowly to face
the other man as he approached.
"Okay," Alex breathed. "I'm ready."
"You sure? You really do look kind of pale."
"Just tired. Let's go."
The ride to the airport was a relatively quiet business. Skinner kept his
attention to the road while Alex stared in pensive silence out the window.
Suddenly, the younger man turned to the other and spoke.
"I don't feel nearly as weird as I thought I would."
Frowning, Skinner glanced briefly over at Alex.
"What d'you mean, weird?"
"I mean we really didn't get off to a good start. Things haven't exactly been
relaxed between us, and I never would have imagined that we could spend more
than a few seconds alone with each other. But I uh...even though you were kind
of harsh for a while there last night, I appreciated the company. And the
advice."
"Just trying to snap you out of that state you seem to be in. For your good and
for Mulder's."
Alex paused a moment, trying to gather his thoughts, then asked, "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Do you care?"
"I just do. I want you guys to be happy. Is that so hard to believe?"
"Truthfully?"
Skinner shook his head and returned his gaze to the road.
"Never mind."
"No, really," Alex said softly. "I admit that you have been trying. It's just
hard for me to believe you could go from one extreme to the other is all.
So...you're over me?"
"Jesus," Skinner breathed and said nothing more.
"Simple question," Alex informed the older man.
"Simple questions don't always have the simplest of answers. I'm never going to
do anything to try and hurt you and Mulder, okay? Never."
Accepting the roundabout answer, Alex again went silent. Minutes later, they
arrived at the airport.
"We got half an hour before his plane lands," Skinner commented, looking at his
watch as the two men moved through the terminal. "Want to grab some coffee or
something?"
"I don't think my stomach could hold anything," Alex answered as he matched the
other man's long strides. "I don't know what I'm going to say to him," he
whispered as they moved one at a time through the metal detector.
"How about, 'Hi honey, glad you're home'?"
"And don't let on that I know why he was really out there?"
"That's your call. But if your poker face ain't what it used to be, I suggest
you start thinking of a way to discuss it with him."
Fox watched the ground get closer and closer. Felt the plane finally meet it,
but he barely registered the sound of scattered applause as it slowed to a
smooth stop. In his mind he was walking those last few feet toward Alex,
wrapping the younger man tightly in his arms, and kissing him breathless.
Deciding that he didn't give a damn that people around them might stare, he
resolved to do just that.
The moment he was able to do so, he got up and moved as quickly to the exit as
the slow moving elderly couple in front of him would allow. Fighting the urge to
blow past them once they reached the narrow passageway, he smiled patiently at
the tiny woman, who looked back and up the considerable distance to his face.
"I'm afraid we don't move as well as we used to," she said apologetically as
they continued to crawl forward.
"Take your time," he answered kindly, mentally chastising himself for the
exasperation he'd initially felt.
Finally they'd rounded the slight curve, and Fox could see several smiling faces
waiting at the gate. None of them belonged to Alex, however, and he immediately
began to worry.
Several different thoughts ran through his head, none of them comforting, and
then Fox saw him.
Standing a bit to the left of the bulk of the crowd, looking terribly uneasy and
tired as hell, Alex gave him a relieved smile. Fox reached him seconds later and
wrapped him in a gentle embrace. But instead of the kiss he'd planned on, he
placed a hand on the back of Alex's head and lowered it to his shoulder. Alex's
arms slid around his waist, and the younger man sank more deeply into the
clinch, prompting Fox to speak.
"Alex? Baby, are you all right?"
Unable to answer at the moment, Alex held more tightly to Fox, adding to the
older man's concern.
"Alex..."
"He'll be okay."
Fox's head snapped around, facing in the direction of the soft baritone.
"What are you...what's going on?"
"He was much too tired to drive. I insisted on bringing him to pick you up."
"Why's he so...Alex, did you sleep at all while I was gone?"
Finally, slowly, Alex lifted his head and trained a bloodshot gaze on his lover.
"I..." He cleared his throat and started again. "I'm okay. Just had a little
insomnia."
Fox searched Alex's face then turned back to Skinner.
"Let's get out of here."
They retrieved Fox's bags from the carousel downstairs and exited the terminal;
Fox refusing to remove his arm from around Alex's waist until they got to the
car. Skinner threw the two bags into the trunk, and Fox slid into the back seat
with Alex as soon as the doors were unlocked. He waited for Skinner to get in
and start the engine before he spoke again.
"Babe?"
Wary, emerald eyes rose to meet Fox's.
"I want to know what's wrong."
"I missed you," Alex answered, only telling his lover a half- truth. "And
I...couldn't sleep."
"You didn't tell me you were having trouble sleeping when I talked to you on the
phone."
"No. I w-wouldn't want to upset you while you were on a...a case."
The last few words were barely audible, and Fox looked at Alex with narrowed
eyes. His gaze shifted upward just in time to catch Skinner watching in the
rearview mirror. When the older man quickly averted his eyes, Fox's suspicion
deepened. But instead of pushing the issue, he coaxed Alex to lean into his
embrace, kissing the top of his head and quietly stroking his back while
occasionally meeting Skinner's eye in the mirror.
When Skinner pulled into his spot in the parking garage of their home, Fox
shifted slightly, prompting Alex to sit upright. The three exited the vehicle,
and Skinner unlocked the trunk, removing one bag while Fox pulled the other out.
"I'll take that," Alex offered, reaching for the garment bag that Skinner held,
but the other man refused to relinquish it.
"I got it," Skinner argued and started toward the elevator, leaving the other
two a few steps behind.
"Helpful, isn't he?" Fox asked, following in the older man's wake.
"He's okay," Alex answered softly, incurring a surprised look from his lover. He
gave Fox a half smile and said nothing more.
Once inside the elevator, Fox stood with Alex against the wall, stroking the
younger man's back and casting suspicious glances at Skinner.
Avoiding Fox's eye as much as possible, Skinner monitored the panel, watching as
the button for each floor lit then went dark. When they reached their first
stop, he stepped out first then hung back to let the two lead the way to their
apartment. They reached the door, and Alex unlocked it, letting Fox walk in
first.
"You sure were busy, weren't you?" he asked, looking around at the immaculate
living room.
"You know how I hate messes," Alex answered, taking Fox's bag from him. "If
there's anything you don't like, we can change it around."
"I wouldn't change a thing," Fox answered, tenderly stroking his lover's chin.
"I'll see Skinner out and bring the other bag into the bedroom."
Alex nodded and thanked Skinner for the ride then, looking away quickly, ducked
into the bedroom.
Fox turned and stared at Skinner, the hard glint in his eyes speaking to his
distress and suspicion.
"What's going on?" he asked as softly as he could and still let Skinner know how
upset he was.
"Go talk to Alex," is all Skinner would say.
"You told him, didn't you? You told him why I was out there!"
Skinner lowered his head for a moment then looked back up into infuriated gilded
eyes.
"I didn't have to."
"What the hell's that supposed to mean?"
"He's very perceptive, Mulder. He knew after talking to you a few times that
something was up. He called me over here and insisted that I tell him why you
were in California."
"And you couldn't have lied to him??"
"I tried. He knew, and he wouldn't give up until he dragged the truth out of
me."
"What'd he do, tie you to a chair? Shine a bright light in your eyes? Shove
bamboo shoots under your fingernails? Why the fuck didn't you just tell him that
I was there on assignment and walk away?"
"Because then he would have known that something was wrong, and he would have
been even more upset not knowing what it was. Would you have preferred that?"
Fox heaved an exasperated sigh.
"I'd better go talk to him."
"That's what I'm saying."
The younger man turned, and as he reached the door, stopped and murmured,
"Thanks for taking him to pick me up. He really doesn't look like he's in any
condition to have driven."
Skinner nodded and walked away, leaving Fox staring at the door. Taking a
fortifying breath, he walked back into the apartment, picking up his second bag
as he moved into the bedroom. He found Alex, still as stone, staring down at the
clothing draped over his arm. Sensing his presence, Alex began to move.
"I'll take all this stuff to the cleaner's tomorrow," he said, laying Fox's
suits over the chair at the other end of the room.
"Alex."
"Hmm?"
Not looking in Fox's direction, the younger man carried the garment bag to the
closet and hung it up.
Fox approached, dropping his suitcase down on the bed, and slipped an arm around
Alex's waist, turning the other man to face him.
"Look at me," he requested softly, stroking the side of Alex's jaw.
Reluctantly, Alex raised his gaze to Fox's face, and the older man gave him a
sweet, apologetic smile.
"You know, huh?"
Alex again lowered his eyes.
"Why did you lie to me, Fox?"
"Would you have let me go if I didn't?"
"No."
"I had to go," Fox whispered, sliding his hand around to the back of his lover's
head. "Can you understand that I had to go?"
"Anything could have happened to you," Alex argued softly.
"But nothing did. I'm here. I'm home, and I missed you so much."
Fox tipped Alex's head back and came in for a kiss, but the younger man moved
away. Now beginning to find his anger, Alex raised his head, meeting Fox's eyes.
"Did you really think I wouldn't know?" he asked, making no effort to conceal
the slight trembling of his body. "I wanted to believe that you were there for
the reason you explained to me, but I could hear it in your voice. I could hear
it, Fox, and I knew something was wrong. That's when I went to Skinner, and I
found out for sure that you were lying to me."
"I told you why I lied," Fox explained softly.
"I know. I understand that you felt you needed to find him. If our situations
were reversed, I would have done the same. And tell me how you would have felt
when you found out."
"If you would have done it too, then why are we..."
"Tell me," Alex insisted, his voice growing a little louder.
"I would have been worried."
"Worried."
Fox sighed heavily. "I would have been scared to death that something would
happen to you."
Alex nodded, letting Fox chew on his answer for a while. When he spoke again, he
asked the question he'd been afraid to ask.
"Did you find him?"
Fox gave no response.
"Jesus," Alex whispered, hearing the answer in Fox's silence. "What did you do?"
Fox moved closer and, reaching out, gently stroked his lover's hair.
"Is it enough for you to know that he paid for what he did?"
Alex closed his eyes, swallowing the huge lump that had suddenly formed in his
throat.
"He hurt you, baby," Fox murmured. "Did you think that I could let that go? Did
you think that I would?"
Stifling a shudder, Alex asked straight out.
"Did you kill him? I need to know."
A brief silence, then, "Yes."
The trembling increased.
"It's all right, Alex."
"It's not", Alex wailed, spinning away, hands clenched in his hair. "You
killed a man, Fox. Because of me."
"He didn't cheat you in a game of poker, Alex. The fucker drugged you, and then
he raped you! There was no way in hell I could let that go! How could I let it
go and still be worthy of..."
Alex turned sharply to face his lover to find Fox's eyes coated with a heavy
mist. He moved forward, stopping when their bodies were just barely touching.
"Worthy?" he gasped. "Of what? A career criminal, who'd fucked half the men in
L.A.? Don't say it, Fox." Alex cupped his lover's cheek in his palm. "Don't even
think it. It's me. I'm the one who needs to be worthy of you. And I don't
see...in this lifetime or the next ten, how I ever could be."
Before he could think to say another word, Fox's arms were around him, pulling
him into a fierce embrace.
"You're everything," he whispered harshly, one tear dropping from his right eye.
"And whether you think yourself worthy or not, I'll do anything in the world for
you."
"I love you, Fox," Alex croaked, clutching at Fox's jacket. "I never would have
wanted this for you. "I don't..." He started to push away. "I don't want this
for you..."
"No." Fox held tightly to the younger man. "Don't do this. Don't you take any
blame on yourself."
"Whose fault is it that you felt the need to fly clear across the country, hunt
a man down then kill him?"
"It's his fault," Fox hissed, grasping Alex's shoulders and shaking him
gently. "He did it to himself, and the motherfucker got what he deserved. I was
not going to let him get away with it. Just like I never should have let those
other fuckers get away with what they did."
"That's part of this, isn't it?" Alex asked. "You never got past what happened
in that warehouse."
"How could I? Could you?"
"No," Alex said softly. "But Fox, I...what if this comes back to you? I can't
stand the thought of..."
"You're not the only one slippery enough to pull something like that off, you
know," Fox broke in, swiping at his cheek with the back of his hand. "As far as
anyone'll be concerned, some hooker did him then took his money and wallet and
snuck away."
Reddened, shocked eyes focused on Fox's face, trying to comprehend exactly what
the older man was saying.
"Hooker?"
Fox shrugged and said nothing.
"Fox, what did you...you posed as a hooker?"
"It was the best way. Aside from the propositions I had to fend off, I could
hang out in the area and look for him all night without a problem."
Alex's gaze went to the floor. Hand over his mouth, he inhaled deeply, holding
the breath for a few seconds before exhaling slowly. Finally, he dropped his
hand and, still looking at Fox's chest, asked.
"So, that's where you found him?"
"Yeah. Well... he found me. Picked me up last night." Fox's expression took on
an icy quality. "He mentioned you. Not by name, but he described you."
"What made him mention me?" Alex croaked so softly, Fox had to strain to hear
him.
"He told me I was pretty," Fox said. "Said he hadn't seen anybody around there
that pretty since the evil, Green Eyed demon who'd given him his limp. He
implied that you got what was coming to you. He deserved to die for that
alone..."
Alex listened, eyes closed. Silent.
"He took me to his place a few blocks away, expecting a blow job." Fox snorted.
"As if. I let him drop his pants, run his mouth a little bit, and then..."
"Did you shoot him?" Alex croaked.
"No. He thought I was going to. Whimpered and whined. Tried to talk his way out
of it. But shooting him would have been too easy. Too merciful. He didn't
deserve mercy."
"...W-what did you do?"
"I beat him," Fox hissed through gritted teeth. "And then I beat him some more."
"And you're sure he's dead?"
"Oh, yeah."
In slow motion, Alex leaned forward until he felt Fox's arms close around him.
"I'm scared, Fox," he whispered, burying his face in his lover's shirt, no
longer amazed by his ability to make such an admission.
Fox brushed his lips against the glossy, sable hair beneath his chin. "What of?"
"You killed a man for me. You're sure that no one will know who did it,
but...what if someone does?" He tightened his hold on the older man. "What if...
I can't lose you, Fox. I can't, I..."
"You won't," Fox promised. "No one knows. And you know as well as I do that
nobody cares what happens to anyone in that part of town, least of all the
police."
"I know, but..."
"It's all right," Fox whispered, stroking his quaking lover's back. "It's over.
Please don't worry." He scattered a few kisses in Alex's hair while his
wandering hand continued its attempt to soothe the younger man. "I'm sorry,
baby, that I had to lie to you. I hated doing it. But I'll never be sorry for my
reasons." He pulled Alex away, holding the younger man's gaze with his own. "I
love you, Alex. And as long as I've got breath in me, no one will ever hurt you
and get away with it."
Searching his lover's glazed but steady stare, Alex lifted a trembling hand,
tracing the telltale lines of strain and exhaustion around his eyes. Slowly, his
fingers skimmed downward, whispering over the lightly stubbled cheek, then
finally touched Fox's mouth, where they lingered, lovingly caressing the soft
flesh.
"I keep asking myself," Alex breathed, "what happened. How it is you found me
clear across the country, and why in God's name you chose to love me. And that
you would do what you did...for me. I don't know what to say to it. How do I
even begin to...to thank you, to make myself worthy of so much love..."
"All I want from you, Alex...all I need is for you to love me back. And I know
that you do."
"I do," Alex answered, his voice cracking with emotion. The two words were all
he was able to utter before speech abandoned him completely. The nearness of
Fox...the radiant warmth of his body and awesome beauty of his eyes overwhelmed
the younger man, and he slowly pitched forward, meeting Fox's mouth with his
own.
Tenderly, Fox grazed his lover's lips before capturing them in a soft kiss.
Hands, just as gentle, caressed the other man's back and shoulders, then
soothing fingers shuffled through his hair before anchoring themselves in the
sable strands and holding his head for a deeper kiss.
Melting into Fox's arms, Alex moaned softly as the older man's tongue slipped
into his mouth. Fear and anguish slowly melded with desire, and he wound his
arms around his lover's neck, pressing closer as he returned the intimate
caresses.
One hand wandered down from Alex's head, stroking over his neck and back,
rounding the exquisite curve of his rear as Fox pushed against him. The rock
hard proof of his lover's need made his own cock throb in response. After these
few days apart his body screamed for immediate release, but his shaken lover
needed more than quick relief. He needed to be reassured. He needed to be loved.
So, summoning up all of his will power, Fox kept his kisses gentle, his touches
soft, and by the time he removed Alex's shirt, the younger man stood before him
swaying unsteadily, breaths shallow and uneven, and utterly under his spell.
Losing the will to keep his eyes open, Alex closed them and released a brief
moan as worshipful hands traveled the muscled terrain of his upper body. Fox's
mouth soon followed, warm and moist, and his knees lost their strength. Only an
arm wound quickly around his waist held him steady as he was slowly backed to
the bed.
Fox deposited his lover's limp body on the mattress and lay beside him, letting
the tips of his fingers glide over the breadth of his chest. As they lightly
circled one tight nipple, Alex twitched, sounding a breathy whimper. Fox's
tongue followed his hand, gently stroking the pebbled flesh, and the younger man
arched slightly, shivering at the sensation. The shivering turned to all out
shaking when the tip of his tongue flicked quickly back and forth over the tip,
and Alex's hands automatically came up to his head, attempting to anchor
themselves in his hair.
Gently grasping Alex's wrists, Fox pulled his hands away and pressed them to the
mattress beside his head. Retaining his light grasp, he lifted his head and
looked down into eyes opened halfway and brimming with more emotions than he
could name. With all the tenderness he possessed, he feathered Alex's jaw with
tiny kisses, working his way upward, where he nuzzled the younger man's ear and
cheek before descending on his mouth for another kiss.
The increasingly agonizing ache of his body now overwhelming that of his heart,
Alex opened his mouth in offering, allowing Fox to sweep inside. He shifted his
lower body, trying to alleviate the growing discomfort of the jeans he still
wore, and Fox broke the kiss as he became conscious his lover's situation.
"I'm sorry, baby," he whispered against Alex's lips then released his hold on
the younger man's wrists and drew himself up on his knees. One hand skimmed the
solid bulge at the front of Alex's pants, pulling a soft grunt from him. "Let me
take these off."
Alex held his breath while Fox slowly undid the button then zipper. Watched the
tiny smile that came to his lips when he noticed the absence of underwear.
Gasped as the tips of his lover's fingers brushed over the velvety length of his
cock. And as Fox began to work his jeans down, he struggled to find the strength
to help.
Quickly, Fox pulled Alex's boots and socks off, then removed his jeans. When the
younger man lay naked and quivering before him, he released a sound that sounded
something like a cross between a moan and a sigh.
So beautiful.
Alex squirmed in the heat of Fox's stare, and his hips began to move...a slow,
sinuous, unconscious thrust that sent a jolt straight through the middle of
Fox's body.
So fucking sexy.
Alex watched Fox's hands move to his own shirt, undoing button after button. His
eyes followed the garment as his lover peeled it off and let it drop to the
floor, then they shifted back up to Fox's face. An ocean of sparkling green and
gold stared back, and for all the turbulence Alex found lurking in those depths,
Fox's every move displayed only tenderness, and his voice, soft and low, spoke
sweet words.
"You've got me so spoiled, baby," he murmured, undoing his pants. "One day
without seeing your smile...one night without going to sleep with you beside me
is too much." Sliding the charcoal gray material downward, he continued. "I need
to see you...every day." Pants now down around his knees, he slipped his hands
inside the waistband of his underwear, pushing them past his stiff cock and
sending them to join the garment pooled below. "I need to touch you...I need you
to touch me..."
Alex watched Fox dispense with the rest of his clothing then lie over him. The
weight of the older man's body on his was as comforting as it was arousing, and
he lifted his arms, sliding them around his love's back, stroking the hot skin.
"...I need to tell you I love you," Fox breathed, the warmth of his words
flowing over Alex's lips. He lowered his head further, their mouths now
touching. "I need to show you. Every day." His tongue danced across his lover's
lower lip then met its mate in an all too brief caress. "I want to show you now,
Alex. Let me show you how much I love you..."
Fox's last two words were muffled and lost as both men came together in a
soulful kiss. For an eternity they fed hungrily on each other's mouths, neither
man willing to separate from the other. But the insistent press of Alex's cock
against Fox's thigh captured the older man's attention.
Breaking the kiss, Fox looked down into almost black eyes. His hand slipped
between them, grasping Alex's cock at the base and squeezing gently. He watched
the younger man's eyes roll upward and listened to the hard gasp, and he knew
how close to the edge he was. Carefully, he removed his hand, letting it just
barely tease the length of the flushed organ as he did.
Whimpering in protest, Alex's hips bucked, pushing his cock hard against Fox's
thigh, and the older man shifted position, easing the pressure. He looked down
into tortured eyes, expecting a stronger objection, but Alex said nothing.
Rewarded with another kiss for his acquiescence, the younger man lay quietly
beneath his lover, his hands traveling slowly over his back and shoulders.
Waiting.
Breaking the kiss, Fox moved slowly downward, mouth and tongue creating a moist
path along Alex's throat and chest, pausing to tease both nipples to painful
hardness before moving on.
Alex winced at the stinging little nips being scattered over his abdomen even as
his cock pounded in response.
He wanted to beg. To ask Fox to please end his torment, but Jesus, it felt so
good. It'd been days since either man had felt the other's mouth on him...satiny
smooth skin...tasted the intoxicating salty sweetness that they would know
anywhere, and the thought that this might have never been again...Alex couldn't
ask. He had to have more. As he knew that Fox did. Needed it more than he needed
to feel the mutual explosion that would leave them both weak and so utterly
satisfied.
Drowning in Alex's scent...his taste and the texture of him, Fox lingered at the
younger man's midsection, thoroughly bathing the heated skin with his tongue. He
moved lower, stopping to tease Alex's navel before his roughened cheek brushed
over the stony length of his lover's cock. Alex's body jerked, and an
abbreviated moan rumbled in his throat, and Fox smiled, repeating the action
just once more before switching his attention to the sensitive insides of the
other man's thighs.
Alex's body tightened another notch even as his mouth fell open on a harsh gasp.
The contrasting sensations of Fox's soft mouth and light stubble against his
inner thigh, and the silky brush of golden-brown hair against his cock and balls
drove him crazy. Ten more seconds of this and...
Fox lifted his head, recognizing the intense desperation in Alex's tone as the
younger man sobbed his name. Depositing a soft kiss on the base of his lover's
cock, he slithered up to meet Alex's hazy stare.
"Can't make it?"
"I want to," Alex panted, moving his hands restlessly over Fox's ass. "I'm
trying..."
Fox studied his lover for a short time then moved a few inches lower and tucked
his head under his chin. He lay motionless except for the occasional brush of
his lips over Alex's shoulder, and when the erratic rise and fall of the other's
chest slowed a bit, he lifted his head and looked into half-closed eyes.
"Better?" he whispered, letting his thumb rasp back and forth just above Alex's
right nipple.
"A little," Alex breathed, combing his fingers through Fox's hair.
"Good."
Creases form between Alex's eyebrows, and he moaned softly as Fox's head shifted
a fraction, and he felt the tip of the older man's tongue flick over his nipple.
"Jesus. Fox, oh... Christ."
Fox pulled at the hard nub, sucking and licking while Alex squirmed beneath him.
He knew that in just those few seconds, Alex had again reached the same intense
level of arousal he'd been at before, and there was only one way to bring him
down.
Whimpering breathlessly, Alex endured the loss of stimulation and watched his
lover open the nightstand drawer. Withdrawing what he needed, the older man
pulled himself up, straddling Alex's waist then handed one package to him.
"Put it on for me," Fox commanded softly, stroking himself while Alex ripped at
the foil with shaking hands. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply as Alex
swiped away the viscous pearl of fluid at the tip of his cock before placing the
latex over the head and rolling it on. He opened his eyes and watched the man
beneath him then lift his fingers to his mouth and hungrily suck the trace of
semen away. A smoldering gaze lifted itself to his, and Alex removed his
fingers, letting them curl around his sheathed cock.
"The day you're able to slide down my throat without this thing, I'm going to
suck you dry."
The corner of Fox's mouth twitched at the lewd declaration, and he handed the
lube to the younger man.
"Soon, baby," he croaked, watching Alex's hand wander lovingly over his cock,
distributing the cool gel. When Alex finished, he backed up a bit, sliding the
second condom onto his lover. He held his hand out, accepting a little lube and
smoothing it over the latex-encased shaft.
The veins stood out on Alex's neck as he gritted his teeth, enduring the extreme
pleasure of Fox's touch. He emitted several shuddering breaths as Fox's hand
moved away, then wrapped his arms around the older man as Fox stretched out over
him.
Finding his lover's mouth with his own, Fox slid his hands under Alex's thighs
and lifted, encouraging the other man to wrap his legs around his waist. With
one hand, he grasped his erection at the base and guided it between the smooth
cheeks of Alex's ass, grunting into the younger man's mouth as he pushed the
head inside. Alex's fingers clenched in his back, and the other's tongue plunged
into his open mouth as he thrust deeper, and the combined sensations rippled
through his body, prompting him to move more quickly.
Alex jerked his head away, breaking the deep kiss, and groaned loudly.
"God. Harder...Jesus, Fox...please..."
Pinpoints of sweat broke out over Fox's face as for a few seconds, he gave his
lover what he asked for. Alex yelped sharply as he slammed into him at least
half a dozen times, but the noise soon turned into a pleading whimper as he
slowed considerably.
"No...Fox...donıt stop. God, please don't."
"I won't," Fox gasped, thrusting as gently as he could. "I can't." But he
maintained his frustrating pace, drawing many a protest from the man beneath
him.
"Shhh. Easy, baby," Fox whispered shakily, trying to calm his distressed lover.
"Look at me."
Dark, tormented eyes lifted to focus on the older man's face.
"Relax, sweetheart," Fox purred, stroking the side of Alex's face and head
soothingly. "Breathe and just..." He stopped speaking for a moment and thrust
slowly into the younger man. "...Feel me."
Eyes never leaving Fox's face, Alex took in a shaky breath and let it out.
Another followed, and as Fox began to move in a leisurely rhythm, he struggled
to comply with his lover's request. He concentrated on Fox's hands, stroking and
holding him so gently. The muscles in Fox's back. Flexing under his touch...and
the imposing presence inside him...
Feeling the incredible physical possession of his body and the softer, loving
possession of his heart, Alex emitted a long, fragmented sigh. Drowning in the
glittering amber of his lover's eyes, it hit him. Suddenly. Just like that.
He'd known for a long time now that Fox loved him. But as sure as he was of
that, he was equally as sure that it would only be a matter of time until
something happened to end it. But now, lying here beneath Fox, looking into his
eyes like he'd done so many times before, he saw what blind terror had never
allowed him to see. And just like that, it was all gone. The ache he carried
every day in his heart. The fear that sooner or later this thing between them
would run its course, and he would have to leave. All gone.
Fox had killed a man for him. Not because Alex was a terrible influence on him.
Not because Fox was trying to prove to Alex and himself that he really did love
him. He did it for the reason Alex would have done it if their situations were
reversed. Fox truly, desperately, unconditionally loved him, just as he'd tried
to make Alex believe so many times before. And, plain and simple, any one who'd
tried to hurt him would have Fox to deal with.
In that fraction of an instant, lightning had finally struck. This would not
end. Fox would never stop loving him. Their lives and their souls were one.
Always.
Fox stopped his languid movements and frowned as Alex's eyes welled up and
spilled over.
"What?" he asked, barely above a cracked whisper as he brushed the moisture away
from one cheek.
Alex shook his head as more tears fell. "I love you," he gasped, choking back a
sob.
"I love you too, baby," Fox answered, pushing the hair back from the younger
man's face.
"I know." A tiny sob escaped from Alex's constricted throat, and he pulled Fox
down into a fierce embrace. "I know, I know, I..."
A barrage of kisses fell on the confused man's face and shoulders as Alex began
to rock against him. Vowing to figure it all out later, Fox responded, pushing
deeply, again and again into his lover.
"Christ," Alex groaned, clawing at Fox's back. "Oh, God. Fox..."
"Easy," Fox breathed against Alex's mouth before capturing it with his own. At
the same time, he wrapped a hand around the younger man's cock, and Alex bucked
against him, his cries lost in his lover's kiss.
Gently, Fox milked Alex's cock as he settled into a constant rhythm. He broke
the kiss, panting heavily as his body tightened and shuddered, well on its way
to ecstasy. His lover's harsh wails prompted him to quicken his pace, and as he
did, Alex's head snapped back into the pillows, and the younger man released a
bone-jarring roar. Bucking wildly, Alex came seconds later, taking Fox with him
into he storm that encircled and consumed them both. When it was over, Fox
slumped over Alex, moaning softly and licking the sweat from the side of his
neck.
Alex lay motionless beneath his lover's weight, too drained at the moment for
his mind to process the sensation. When he finally began to come around, he
moaned and raised a hand to Fox's head, lovingly petting the golden-brown
strands.
Fox kissed the spot he'd previously been licking and lifted his head to look at
his weary lover.
"You okay?"
"Mmm hmm."
Cupping Alex's cheek, Fox came in for a tender kiss then pulled back. His thumb
stroked the younger man's face as he studied him intently. Alex stared back at
his lover, dreamy eyed, though tears still glistened at the tips of his lashes.
Still unsure of what was in the younger man's mind, but fairly confident that it
was nothing really bad, Fox smiled down at him.
"Good to be home."
Alex nodded and pulled Fox down to his chest, wrapping the older man in a snug
embrace.
The two lay silently for a long while, nuzzling and stroking each other, then
Fox spoke.
"Would I be spoiling the mood if I was to tell you that I'm really hungry?"
Alex smiled into the older man's hair and squeezed him a little more tightly.
"What d'you want to eat?"
"I don't know," Fox mumbled. "What's here?"
"The kitchen is stocked. Wanna go have a look?"
Fox nipped at Alex's throat then kissed the same spot. "Yeah. How 'bout a quick
shower first?"
Agreeing, Alex let Fox strip them both of their used condoms and lift himself to
his feet. He took the older man's outstretched hand and was pulled up and
straight into Fox's arms. He giggled softly as Fox closed his teeth over the
muscle between his neck and shoulder, and he tapped his lover's rear lightly
with one hand.
"If you're thinking that slapping my ass is going to act as a deterrent, let me
tell ya..."
Alex broke into laughter and pulled Fox into the bathroom. Twenty minutes later,
both men emerged, damp and barely dressed. Fox walked a couple of steps behind
Alex, watching the tempting sway of his ass, snugly encased in a pair of
lightweight boxer briefs.
"Okay, you name it, I got it," Alex rambled, walking into the kitchen. "You want
sandwiches? There's roast beef, peanut butter, jelly, fluff, ham, liverwurst..."
"Liverwurst?" Fox repeated, wrinkling his nose.
"Fine, so don't eat it." Alex opened a cabinet door and went on. "I can open a
can of something. Soup, stew, clam chowder..." Walking over to the refrigerator,
he opened the door on the left. "Frozen pizza, waffles, shit!"
Fox laughed, jumping back as the other man whirled to face him.
"You pinched me!"
"Sorry," Fox apologized without an ounce of sincerity in his voice. "It's your
fault."
"S'cuse me?"
Fox nodded. "For having such a pretty ass. It's all round and tight, and..." He
shrugged and grinned at the younger man. "I had to...it was like my hand had a
mind of its own."
Alex snorted. "Nice. Are you done now? Can we get back to lunch?"
"I guess." The grin grew wider. "Just don't turn your back on me."
Alex sighed heavily and opened the door to the right. Peering inside, he began
running down another list.
"There's stuff for salad, left over spaghetti..."
"Actually, a big salad sounds good."
"Okay."
"With chunks of ham."
Alex grabbed the ham and cradled the package in the crook of his arm, alongside
the spinach and cucumbers.
"And hard boiled eggs."
Alex turned and looked blankly at his smirking lover before reaching back into
the refrigerator for the eggs.
"You got the tomatoes?"
"You want me to drop the eggs?" Alex asked, moving over to the counter.
Chuckling softly, Fox moved to the refrigerator and retrieved the tomatoes and
salad dressing.
"Hey, we got any Italian bread?"
"French."
"That'll work. Uh..." Fox looked around, realizing that he was going to have to
learn where everything was. "Where'd you put it?"
Alex turned from the sink, where he'd begun to wash the spinach. "In there," he
answered, motioning to the set of doors to the left of the stove.
Fox located the bread and a knife, and began to slice the loaf. As he began to
make his fourth cut, he glanced over at Alex, who was now slicing a cucumber. He
put the knife down and turned to face the younger man. Leaning against the
counter, he ran one finger down the shadowed jaw.
"Have I ever told you how sexy domestic Alex is?"
Alex flattened both palms on the counter and bent over it, laughing.
"What're you laughing at?" Fox huffed. "I'm serious."
"I know you are," Alex replied, still laughing. "That's what makes it funny."
Fox scowled at the other. "Why's that?"
"Only you, Fox, could find something sexy in hacking up a cucumber."
"It wouldn't be sexy on anybody else."
Grinning, Alex turned into Fox's warmth and draped his arms over the other man's
shoulders.
"No?"
Fox wrapped Alex in his arms and shook his head. "Only you."
Alex answered with a soft chuckle and gave his lover a gentle kiss.
"I love you."
"Then feed me."
More chuckling. "Let go of me, and I will."
Fox released the younger man and helped him prepare the salad, then the two
settled down in the living room with their meal. Halfway through, Fox slowed his
pace, focusing his attention on the other man.
As he plunged his fork into his salad, Alex felt the weight of Fox's stare
resting on him. He froze, shifting only his eyes up to his lover's face. When
the older man said nothing, he lifted his head and gave him a wary smile.
"What?"
"There's a change in you."
"A change?"
Fox nodded. "I could see it in your face earlier while we were making love. It
was almost as though you'd had some sort of a...a revelation or something. Then
you just got this peaceful look on your face afterward." He smiled at the other
man. "It's still there."
Alex bowed his head and smiled.
"You were so upset earlier," Fox went on. "What changed?"
Alex hesitated then looked up at the other man.
"You might get mad at me."
Fox smirked at the soft warning. "Why would I get mad at something that's
obviously made you feel better?"
"Because...it's something you've been trying to get me to believe for as long as
we've been together. And I really just finally got it."
Fox reached out, caressing the side of his lover's face and waited.
"Iım not afraid anymore," Alex explained, his lips curving into a sweet smile.
Fox didn't need to ask what he meant. But he did want to know how.
"What happened?" the older man asked, gently trailing his fingertips over Alex's
throat.
"It just..." Alex shrugged and snapped his fingers. "...happened." He focused a
worshipful stare on his lover. "You and me. I got that now."
Fox set his plate down and wound an arm around Alex's waist, pulling the other
man toward him.
"I'm glad," he murmured before fastening his lips on the other man's. Breaking
away after long seconds, he grinned. "Hey, I like the taste of your salad
dressing better than mine. What is that?"
Alex laughed softly, relieved that Fox wasn't upset about him taking so long to
come to his senses. "Honey bacon."
Another kiss. "Yeah, that's good," Fox said, confirming his earlier statement.
Alex speared some of the contents of his plate and brought the loaded fork up to
Fox's mouth.
"I'll share it with you if you want."
Fox took the offering, thanking Alex with a peck on his cheek then picked up his
own plate.
"It's okay, I'll eat mine. I'll just remember the next time that I like the
honey bacon better."
"You sure?" Alex pressed. "I can chuck this and get you more."
"No, babe. It's fine, really." Fox kissed the tip of his lover's nose. "Thanks,
though."
When the meal was finished and everything was cleaned up, the two retired again
to the living room, where Fox reclined against the arm of the couch and pulled
Alex back to his chest. They lounged quietly, enjoying just being close, then
Alex cleared his throat and spoke.
"Skinner's not such a bad guy."
Busily nuzzling the sable hair beneath his chin, Fox murmured into it, "Even if
he is a puss."
"Huh?"
"He wasn't supposed to tell you where I was, and he caved. You gave him that
look, didn't you?"
Alex could hear the humor in his lover's voice.
"What look?"
"You know the one," Fox insisted. "That turn a man's insides to mush and his
dick to stone look."
Alex dissolved into laughter. "S'cuse me?"
"That's right. Nobody can resist that look. I know I sure as hell can't. And if
Skinner's still hot for you, and I can't imagine that he isn't, he went down in
flames too."
"I don't have a look."
"Oh yeah, you have; trust me."
Alex snorted softly. "So anyway. He was pretty decent to me. He could have
bolted after he told me what you were really up to, but he didn't. He stayed and
listened to me rant. By the way, we really should stop threatening to kill him."
Fox tipped Alex's head up, meeting his lover's gaze.
"What?"
"Well, you've threatened him. I've threatened him...the man's starting to
develop a complex."
"Okay..."
Alex switched back to the subject.
"And he talked to me. Tried to reason with me. You know what a job that is when
I'm being unreasonable."
"Oh yeah, I know."
Alex gave the older man's knee a half-hearted swat.
"He let me have it after reason didn't really work. Shocked the hell out of me.
Not so much what he'd said, but that he knew that it had to be said, and he
cared enough to say it."
"What'd he say?"
"In a nutshell, he told me to get my shit together and be the man you deserve
instead of just whining about it."
Before Fox could unleash the torrent of protest Alex saw coming, the younger man
silenced him with a swift kiss. Pulling back, he continued.
"He wasn't out of line, Fox. Actually, he was pretty insightful. Of course maybe
it doesn't take a genius to see how stupid I was being."
"Alex, you're not stupid."
"Not generally, no. But I was being stupid about us...you. I had the whole
scenario all set in my mind. You'd love me today. Maybe tomorrow. Then you
wouldn't. And that would be it. I'd sit back and let it happen because it was
what I deserved. My destiny.
"You know, the old Alex Krycek might have been a low down snake, but there was
one quality he possessed, as Skinner so astutely pointed out, that was a
positive one. He didn't believe in destiny. He didn't sit around and wait for
things to happen. He made them happen. He was in control, and he got what he
wanted." He looked up into Fox's face, his eyes burning an intense green. "I
want you."
"You've got me," Fox answered, his mouth hovering within a breath of Alex's. The
younger man nodded.
"That's basically what Skinner was trying to tell me. And even though I'd told
myself on occasion that I'd do whatever I had to do to keep you, it was
half-hearted. I didn't truly believe that I had any choice in the matter.
Despite all your assurances, I never really believed deep in my heart that there
was anything I could do to make you always want me. I never thought I should
even try."
"Because you still thought I'd be better off without you."
Alex averted his eyes and nodded, acknowledging the observation.
"And now you really know how untrue that is?"
Alex turned to the side, resting now on his hip. Nestling into his lover's
embrace, he sighed softly.
"I know. I'm sorry about all that I've put you through."
"Don't apologize," Fox replied, tightening his hold on the man in his arms.
"Everything I've been through, you've been through. And much more. The important
thing is that we're together. All that's happened, and all that's been done to
us hasn't destroyed us." He emphasized his next words with a firm squeeze. "We
won, Alex. We're together. We're strong." He slipped a hand under Alex's chin
and lifted, meeting his lover's shining eyes. "You and me."
A slow smile lit the younger man's face. Full and beautiful and exuding a
confidence Fox had rarely seen in all the months since they had become lovers.
He wrapped his arms around Fox's neck, hugging the older man tightly, and
echoing his last words.
"You and me." He shifted slightly, burying his face in the curve of Fox's
throat. "Jesus, I feel so..." He paused, looking for the right words.
"...light."
Fox understood.
"About time, huh?"
"Yeah." Alex nuzzled his lover's throat. "Thank you for being so patient."
"Baby," Fox murmured. "You know I'd never run short of patience."
"I know," Alex whispered. "I love you so much, Fox." He kissed the steady pulse
beneath his lips. "I never thought I'd ever be happy. Or loved. Thank you for
loving me."
"Thank you," Fox countered, capturing his lover's mouth in a thorough kiss.
When he released it, he stared down into softly glowing eyes. "For giving me the
chance. We're going to have a good life, Alex," he whispered, stroking the
younger man's hair. "And it starts right now."
Alex stretched up for a long kiss, feeling his lover's body harden against him.
He moaned softly, deepening the kiss as one hand began to wander, gliding over
Fox's bare chest and stomach. "Fox," he whispered against the older man's mouth,
prompting a muffled reply.
"Hmm?"
"I want you."
Fox smiled against his lover's mouth. "What a coincidence. I was just... "
Before Fox could finish his sentence, Alex had spun into a kneeling position and
was pulling him down onto his back. Now being straddled by the younger man, he
stared up into twin pools of smoldering green. His swelling cock strained
against his underwear, and his mouth fell open on a soft gasp. He'd seen that
raw, predatory look in Alex's eyes only a handful of times since they'd been
together, and it excited him more than he could ever explain.
Alex dropped down, balancing himself on his hands and knees, and he stared
intently at the man beneath him. Fox stared back silently, waiting for him to
sort out his thoughts, and when he spoke, it was in a soft, steady tone.
"I've done a lot of taking. I know you've given me everything you have gladly,
and I know you'd continue to give as long as I needed it." He lowered his head,
brushing his lips over Fox's. "Tonight I'm going to give back," he promised,
making Fox sigh against his teasing mouth. "Until you scream."
Fox whimpered into Alex's open mouth, his sounds of arousal muffled as the
younger man's tongue plunged inside, scouring the soft walls, seeking its mate.
Blissfully, he submitted to the invasion, and when Alex eventually pulled away,
he forced his eyes open and looked up expectantly.
Alex rose to his feet, giving Fox an excellent view of the bulge in his
underwear. Holding out his hand, he waited for the other man to take it, then
pulled him up off of the sofa.
"Come with me."
"Where are we going?" Fox asked, dropping his head to Alex's shoulder as the
younger man pulled him into his arms.
"Back to bed," Alex rasped, brushing his lips against the surface of Fox's hair.
Again taking his lover's hand, he moved toward the bedroom, where he pushed Fox
down onto the rumpled sheets. The corner of his mouth twitched, and his heart
beat a little faster as he looked down at the man laid out before him in an
enticing sprawl. Eyes of smoky green and amber stared back, waiting.
"So beautiful," Alex moaned, running his hands over the now writhing body. He
slipped his fingers into the waistband of Fox's underwear and slid them off,
revealing a solid, deeply flushed erection. In one fluid movement, he pushed his
own underwear off and kneeled on the bed over Fox, stroking the older man
everywhere his hands could reach. He watched the curtain of golden-brown lashes
drop over his lover's eyes, and the sinfully luscious mouth part on a shuddering
sigh, and his cock gave a hard twitch.
"Feel good, baby?" he asked, letting the backs of his knuckles skim the
underside of the other's cock.
Eyes still closed, Fox nodded as he arched into the light caress.
Alex took his hand away and leaned over the prone man, licking delicately at his
lips.
"I can make you feel better."
Fox whimpered at the whispered vow. "Please," he begged softly, trying to
capture the teasing tongue and failing on each attempt. "Alex... please... "
His pleas were suddenly cut off as Alex's mouth covered his, kissing him deeply.
A long moan rumbled in his throat as his lover settled on top of him, and his
hands moved to the younger man's body, stroking and massaging. Again and again
they traveled the sinewy length of Alex's back, detouring often to worship the
smooth, generous curve of his rear, and when Alex began to rock against him, his
fingers tightened convulsively in the firm muscles.
"Alex," he gasped, breaking from his lover's kiss. "I can't... can't wait. Please... "
"Yes you can," Alex murmured, incurring a frustrated groan from the other man.
"Just a little bit longer... okay?"
Fox whimpered pitifully but issued no more protest, which Alex readily
understood as consent. He gave Fox a sweet smile and nipped gently at the
pouting mouth.
"Hasn't been very often that I get to have my way with you. I know that's my
fault, but I'd like to start making up for it."
Fox lay trembling beneath Alex as the younger man continued nipping, working his
way down his throat and chest and settling on one tight nipple.
"Would you like that, baby?" he asked, dragging his tongue over the stiff peak.
Nodding slightly, Fox whimpered his answer as Alex's teeth closed over the
nipple and tugged.
"Thought so." Alex switched sides and attended to its neglected twin, sucking it
into his mouth and flicking his tongue over the rigid tip. Fox shivered beneath
him, anxiously threading his fingers through his hair, but the older man said
nothing. He didn't need to. The expression in his eyes... the trembling and
incredible heat of his body said all Alex needed to know.
Fox's back arched, and his fingers tightened around the strands of hair between
them as Alex bit down gently on the nipple in his mouth and pulled. His hips
pushed upward as well, trapping his cock and Alex's between the firm press of
their bodies, and a rough moan vibrated around the flesh in the younger man's
mouth.
"Are you trying to tease me?" Alex asked, releasing Fox's nipple and flicking
his tongue over it. "You think you're going to get me to give in sooner?"
A tiny hint of a smile curved the generous mouth, and Fox shook his head,
arching once more into Alex's body. He watched the green of Alex's eyes
disappear behind the thick veil of his lashes, and heard the deep intake of
breath, and he thought that if he continued to tease just a bit longer...
Alex rolled off of Fox and settled on his side, to the older man's right.
Smiling at the whine of protest, he very lightly circled the head of his cock
with one finger.
"It's my show," he purred, leaning in to lick a moist path along Fox's jaw. "And
I don't want to end it yet."
Silently, Fox pouted, trying to gain his lover's sympathy.
"You know what?" Alex asked, rubbing his lips against the other's. "It makes me
so fucking hot when you do that."
"Hot enough to fuck me?" Fox asked, breaking his silence.
"Mmm hmm," Alex answered softly. "But then a sneeze could do that."
Fox moaned in response, licking at Alex's lips as they continued to brush over
his.
"Very tempting," Alex whispered. "But... " He pulled away, leaving a frustrated Fox
whimpering and reaching for him. Grasping his lover's wrists, he held them in a
firm grip and kissed his hands. His gaze rested on the older man's face as his
tongue drifted across each fingertip then down to tickle the warm palms. "You
want to touch me, Fox?" he asked, nipping at the heel of one hand.
"Yes," Fox hissed softly, ineffectually fighting his lover's restraining grip.
Alex pulled Fox's hands to his chest, flattening them against the smooth
expanse.
"Easy," he instructed, releasing his hold on the other's wrists. "Don't rush
it."
Obeying the softly issued order, Fox's trembling hands wandered slowly over his
lover's chest and shoulders, caressing and kneading the flexing muscle.
"I love the way your hands feel on me," Alex whispered, struggling to keep his
eyes open. His head tipped back, and he emitted a long sigh. "So good." He
opened his eyes and cast a smoky stare on the older man. "God, baby, you make me
feel so good."
Unable to tear himself away from his lover's hypnotic gaze, Fox brushed his
fingers across both nipples and watched the sable lashes drop again, hiding the
intense green of Alex's eyes. He lingered a while, teasing the tightly
constricted nubs then moved downward, skimming the taut surface of the other
man's abdomen.
Alex's lips parted on a contented sigh as Fox continued his unhurried
explorations. One hand rose to the other man's head, lovingly petting the
golden-brown silk, and he arched slightly as Fox's hands moved lower still.
"Touch me," he whispered, feeling the other's fingers brush through the nest of
dark curls at his groin. Fox obeyed, feathering the rigid length of his cock,
and he groaned deep in his throat, letting his lover know how much that simple
touch aroused him.
Wanting desperately to wrap his hand around the younger man's cock and stroke
the full, flushed length of it, Fox battled the urge. Alex was in control, and
Fox wouldn't take it from him. They'd both waited too long for Alex's confidence
to build to this point.
There'd been other times. Fleeting moments of self-assurance that had left Fox
shuddering in their magnificence. But those moments were far too few, and had
always left him wanting much more. He'd known, though, that emotionally, Alex
hadn't been ready. All those years of pain and degradation had exhausted him so
completely, he simply hadn't been capable of being the man he'd so longed to
be...the man that Fox had deserved.
But now he would be. For the first time he truly could be. Fox's unwavering love
and fierce devotion to him had slowly seeped in and renewed his tired soul. His
infinite patience, and his lethal response to the recent hurt visited upon Alex
had reassured and calmed the younger man's frightened heart, and now blessed
peace had finally settled over him, completely and permanently, and Alex had
never felt so strong.
Alex opened his eyes and looked down at the man so tenderly stroking his cock.
Studied the dreamy expression on the other's face, and he managed a shaky smile.
His. Crazy and miraculous and forever.
Fox raised his head, looking curiously at Alex as the younger man emitted
something of a cross between a moan and a laugh.
"What?" he whispered, kissing his lover's chest.
Taking a long deep breath, Alex shook his head and said nothing.
"Are you laughing at me?" Fox sulked, knowing full well how it affected the
other man.
"Not you," Alex reassured, petting Fox's head. "Everything." His hand slid down
to cup the other man's cheek. "This feeling... it's wild, it's... such a short time
ago it would have been impossible." His thumb rasped across the stubble-shadowed
skin. "I don't ever want to lose it."
Fox nuzzled his lover's palm as his hand continued to lightly caress his cock.
"That makes two of us."
"I didn't mean it that way, I... I just... " Alex gave Fox a crooked smile. "Never
mind. C'mere."
Fox brought himself face to face with Alex and was pulled into a deep kiss
before the younger man put a few inches between them. He let himself be turned
onto his stomach, and then Alex was kneeling over him, straddling his thighs.
Fox's low moan rumbled against Alex's hands as he began to massage the other
man's back. His cock twitched in response, rubbing against Fox's rear as he
purposely, slowly rocked back and forth.
"Fresh."
"You haven't seen fresh," Alex responded gruffly, leaning in to nip at the
back of Fox's neck.
"Mmmmm. You promise?" Fox asked, arching against Alex and receiving a wicked
little chuckle for an answer. He gasped loudly as the younger man surprised him
with a sound slap to his right ass cheek. Trapped between his body and the
mattress, his cock throbbed, and he writhed and moaned beneath the younger man.
He felt the slight weight shift, and Alex leaned down to whisper into his ear.
He shuddered at the warm flow of breath, and then the low hum of his lover's
voice.
"Yeah, I promise."
Alex watched Fox's lips curl up into a lazy smile, and he licked at the left
corner.
"Wouldn't you like to do something about that?" Fox asked, once again pushing up
against Alex's rock-solid cock. "It must be getting kind of painful."
"It is," Alex answered softly, bearing down again on the other man. "It really
is."
"Then fuck me," Fox pleaded breathily. "Please?"
"Soon," Alex replied, running his fingers through the wealth of golden-brown
hair at the back of Fox's head. He kissed Fox's earlobe then moved on, leaving a
moist trail down the side of his neck. He bit gently into the older man's
shoulder then licked the same spot before moving in to tease the sensitive back
of his neck.
Fox let out a shuddering breath and lifted his head a bit from the pillows. He
mouthed the younger man's name then followed it by another barely heard plea for
mercy. Alex's only answer was to suck the flesh into his mouth and leave a small
red mark there. Fox's fingers clenched in the sheets as his lover moved steadily
south, licking and kissing every inch of the way. As the other man reached the
rising swell of his ass, a clipped grunt broke past his clenched teeth.
Immersed in bliss, Alex bathed the smooth skin, letting his tongue dance only
briefly into the cleft between the muscular cheeks. The loud, coarse grunt that
sounded from the pillows above him spoke loud and clear of the torment Fox
suffered. Alex dipped his tongue shallowly once more into the warm crevice,
promising a not too distant future of such unimaginable, unbearably sweet
pleasure. He couldn't wait to drown with Fox in those dark waters. Just a little
longer. A little bit longer, and there'd be no holding him back.
Fox whimpered and twisted, frustrated beyond words as Alex pulled away. A soft
touch gentled his thrashing, and the brush of Alex's mouth over the small of his
back turned his whimpering to a low breathy sigh.
"We'll finish it soon," Alex murmured against the velvety skin before his tongue
moved in a broad swipe across the width of Fox's lower back.
"Now," Fox whined, knowing that his demand would get him nowhere, but feeling
the urgent need to voice his frustrations.
"No."
The warm flow of Alex's breath as he spoke the single word tickled the fine
golden hairs at the base of Fox's spine, and he arched into it, meeting the
teasing lips briefly. The younger man pulled away, and Fox shivered at the loss
of his warmth. An unintelligible plea escaped his throat, and when he received
no response, he turned his head to follow Alex's movements.
Extending one leg out to his side, Alex balanced himself on one knee as he
reached toward the nightstand. As quickly as his awkward position would allow,
he grabbed a couple of condoms and the lube, and he settled his weight over
Fox's rear, sitting for the moment in an upright position. He looked down at
Fox, watching the flutter of his lover's eyelashes as he rolled one of the
condoms over his cock. Such an innocent thing, that tiny flutter, and yet his
breath caught in his throat, and he had to force himself to inhale deeply. The
lashes lifted, and a hazy, greenish-gray gaze shifted up to his face.
"Alex?"
Alex released the breath and answered.
"Yeah, baby?"
Fox's mouth turned down into an exquisite, cock-hardening pout, and he rubbed
the side of his face into the pillow.
"I need... you... "
"How much?" Alex asked hoarsely. "Tell me how much, Fox."
"It hurts," Fox choked, clenching his fingers in the sheets. "God, I... I ache with
it. Please," he gasped breathlessly as Alex slowly stroked some lube onto his
sheathed cock. "Please... Jesus Alex, I'll do anything, just please don't make me
wait anymore... "
"I won't," Alex promised, turning Fox onto his back and pulling him into
position. Guiding the head of his cock to small opening hidden between the other
man's ass cheeks, he pushed tentatively, feeling the muscle slowly yield to him.
His eyes rolled up, and his lashes drooped, forming a dense curtain over the
twin pools of deep green as he slowly buried himself in his lover's silken heat.
"Is that what you wanted?" he whispered, freezing halfway in, afraid that
anything more would trigger the explosion he was now fighting to contain.
Fox nodded frantically and began to rock against Alex, but the younger man
quickly gripped his hips and stopped him.
"Wait," Alex breathed, his fingers biting into the flesh they held as he
attempted to hold off orgasm.
Muffling his whimpers, Fox obeyed the shaken command and ceased movement. He
waited for what seemed to him like hours before Alex began to move again. Inch
by inch the younger man pushed forward until he was completely embedded in Fox's
ass, then he stopped again.
"Christ," he panted, the one word gasp ruffling Fox's hair. The older man
stroked his back and kissed one shoulder, then spoke softly to him.
"If you can't," Fox began, pausing to take a breath. "Can't hold on... "
"No," Alex interrupted. "I'm all right."
"Alex... "
"It's your fault," Alex told Fox, attempting a pained smile.
"My... "
The younger man soundly kissed Fox then drew his tongue across his lips. "If you
weren't so damn sexy." Another deep breath. "You drive me insane."
The admission gained a tiny smile from Fox. He tightened his muscles, squeezing
Alex gently, and the younger man nearly lost it.
"God. Ah, shit." Alex gritted his teeth, panting heavily for long moments,
then he turned his attention on the man beneath him.
"Bad Fox," he warned unevenly just before another solid slap was delivered to
Fox's ass. The older man yelped sharply then began to moan as he writhed against
him.
"You like that?" Alex cooed, caressing the patch of flesh he'd just struck.
Fox nodded, lifting his head to lap at the other man's mouth.
"Damn, you're an unbelievable slut," Alex murmured, the statement smothered in
affection. "My beautiful, outrageous slut."
Fox flinched as the next slap landed in the same vicinity as the first. He
groaned deep in his throat, and his fingers dug into Alex's back as he squirmed
and rocked desperately against the younger man.
"Fuck," Alex grated, feeling the electricity again begin to sizzle through his
extremities and lower body. There was no stopping it this time. He didn't even
want to try. Without warning, his mouth came down hard on Fox's, and he began to
move, thrusting forcefully into the other man. He jerked out of the kiss,
snarling through gritted teeth as he felt the rush of ecstasy bearing down on
him. He slammed erratically into Fox, sobbing with each thrust, and then he
broke.
Fox took stroke after punishing stroke, submitting completely to Alex's
ferocious possession of his body. His aching cock trapped between them, the
friction from it was enough to take Fox over the edge, and he joined his lover
on the brief journey into rapture. Alex's furious roars sounded endlessly in his
ear, triggering his own raucous reaction, and the hot, slick proof of his climax
burst between them, providing ease of motion as his lover continued to thrash
against him.
Soon enough Alex began to falter, alternately slowing to a near stop, then
bucking violently in a millisecond-long burst of energy. Finally every last
ounce of strength seeped away, and he collapsed on top of Fox, slipping out of
him as he fell. His head pillowed on the older man's shoulder, he lay
motionless, barely breathing as Fox weakly raised a hand to his head.
Slowly stroking the perspiration-dampened hair, Fox whispered shakily into the
nearly unconscious man's ear.
"I'm going to love this."
Alex lifted his head a scant few inches but kept his eyes closed.
"Hmm?"
"Aggressive, confident, dominant Alex. I haven't seen him nearly as much as I'd
like to. I'm going to love having him on a more regular basis."
Alex let his head drop back down to Fox's shoulder.
"'Z'at right?"
"Mmm hmm."
"Maybe you won't."
Fox kissed the side of his lover's head. "Why wouldn't I?"
Alex shrugged. "Don't know. Just might decide you like me the way I was."
Fox laughed softly, hugging the younger man to him.
"I didn't say I was going to let you top me all the time. I enjoy making you
beg way too much."
Alex managed a smile and snuggled against Fox's warmth.
"But," Fox went on, "I also love when you're in control. I love being your...
kracivaia suka."
Alex burst into laughter. "You remember, huh?"
"How could I forget?"
Regaining some of his strength, Alex raised his head and looked down into
contented, gilded eyes.
"Jesus, this is so perfect."
Fox squinted up at the other man.
"You're not going to tell me it's too perfect, are you?"
"No," Alex murmured, nuzzling Fox's throat. "I'm not afraid, Fox. Not anymore.
Iım just grateful." He took the other man's mouth in a long, sweet kiss then
released it. "So very grateful."
Fox looked up into sparkling eyes and smiled. "That makes two of us." He stroked
a few sable strands away from Alex's face then anchored his fingers in the hair
at the back of the younger man's head. "And I'm damn tired." He looked down
between them. "And sticky. What do you say to a warm shower, then we can get
some sleep?"
Alex shifted to look at the alarm clock and began to chuckle.
"Well, if you really want to, but it's only ten minutes after five."
"That's all?" Fox asked, picking his head up to see for himself. "Damn. I feel
like it's midnight."
"Actually, you aren't the only one," Alex replied, rubbing his head against
Fox's shoulder. "I feel like I haven't slept in two weeks."
"Well then, I don't think time makes a difference, does it?" Fox asked, gently
pushing Alex up and off of him. "Come on, let's get cleaned up then we can
crash."
Less than half an hour later, both men were showered, the linens were changed,
and they fell into bed together, Fox wrapped in the loving warmth of Alex's
arms. Sleep came quickly, and neither man woke until very early in the morning.
Fox sighed softly, blinking in the darkness. A quick glance at the alarm clock
told him that it was three-thirty. He was about to close his eyes when the urge
hit him to turn his head to the left. As he did, the dark outline of his lover
immediately came into view. He could see only enough to realize that Alex lay
there beside him, head propped in one hand, and the younger man appeared to be
looking at him.
"You awake?" he asked softly in case Alex really wasn't.
"Mmm hmm."
"What're you doing?"
"Watching you sleep."
Maybe it was the lateness of the hour that lent Alex's voice that smoky, honey
and gravel tone. Maybe it was just because he'd been asleep. Whatever it was, it
made Fox tingle all over.
"I'm not sleeping now."
"No, you're not."
Fox had only enough time for a single breath before Alex was on him, sucking him
into a tempest of blinding, deafening ecstasy. Almost an hour later, he lay
dazed and unsure of what exactly had hit him. The only thing he was sure of
was that he was completely robbed of all of his strength, and his entire body
ached most pleasurably.
Oh yes, he was going to just love dealing with this Alex on a regular basis.
Smiling, he closed his eyes and nestled into his lover's side.
Ahhh, life was good.
Blue eyes closed momentarily then blinked to clear themselves before looking at
the fourteenth slide the agent had just placed under the microscope. Studying
the sample for not more than ten seconds, she scribbled a few words on a notepad
and removed the slide, tossing it carelessly aside.
Goddamn, this was fucking boring.
She sighed and looked around the room, tuning in to the others around her.
Deeply engrossed in their tasks, the lab rats as she'd come to refer to them
scurried about, examining evidence, deciphering notes, running tests...
Important work she admitted, but shit, it was boring. She missed being in the
field. Following Mulder from case to outrageous case. Eating in dumpy diners,
sleeping in fleabag motels...
And whose fault is it that you aren't doing that any more?
Her lips formed a thin line as she thought about the one who'd ruined her life.
Don't think I've forgotten, Krycek. I haven't. Your day is coming. Sure as
death and taxes, you fucking prick.
"What was that, Agent Scully?"
Scully spun around in her seat, clearly shaken by the presence behind her.
"What?"
"You were mumbling something as I approached."
The woman blinked at A.D. Skinner and shook her head.
"Nothing. I was just... I... I suppose I was talking to myself. Been doing a lot of
that lately."
Skinner studied the agent for a split second before changing the subject.
"How are you doing down here?"
"I've been in the lab for almost a month now. This is the first time you've
come. Though I have to say, I really didn't expect to see you at all."
"I know." Skinner held her gaze. "I thought I'd let you get settled first."
Scully turned back to her microscope. "Kind of you."
"Scully... "
"I'm very busy cataloguing these slides, sir. Is there something I can help you
with?"
"No, I... I just wanted to know if you were all right."
Scully shrugged. "Why wouldn't I be? My career is in the toilet... which might
actually be a step up from where it was, I suppose... the man who used to be my
partner and best friend will have nothing to do with me. I'm stuck here in this
sterile hell with half a dozen expressionless geeks to keep me company... "
"I hate to point this out to you, Scully, but the situation you're in is one of
your own making."
"Of course," Scully hissed. "Mulder gets his stupid ass involved with an
assassin turned hooker, I try to save him from himself, and this is what I get
for all my trouble. Makes perfect sense to me."
"Give it a rest, Scully," Skinner snapped, keeping his voice low. "Nothing you
did was for Mulder's benefit. It was all for you. You wanted Krycek, and you
didn't care if you had to hurt Mulder to do it." Skinner shook his head in
enduring disbelief. "Your best friend, Scully."
"I didn't want to hurt him," Scully snapped back.
"Then, why did you?"
"I have a lot of work to do here, sir. If you have no business to discuss with
me, I should get back to it."
"Scully, I think you need to talk to someone."
"About?"
"All this anger and whatever else you're feeling. It's not normal. It's not
you. I've known you many years, Dana. You're an intelligent, reasonable,
thoughtful woman. You don't do things like... " He looked around, noting that the
other inhabitants of the lab were still oblivious to them. "... what you've done. I
think it'd do you some good to spend some time with Doctor Kearney."
"You think I need a psychiatrist?" Scully laughed softly.
"I think you need to get to the bottom of all this anger before it destroys you.
And maybe... just maybe if you tackle these issues of yours and show Mulder that
you're trying to make things right, he'll let you back into his life."
"Are you kidding me? Mulder and I are done. He thinks I hurt his poor, sweet,
innocent Alex baby. He'll never forgive me. In fact, I'm sure he'd just as soon
see me swinging from a tree as speak two words to me."
"He thinks?"
"Krycek can't be hurt. The man is scum."
"Scum that you wanted to get into bed."
Scully turned her face, offering no reply.
"And he can be hurt. Like you, I didn't think it was possible but the truth
is, he's much more vulnerable than we could have ever dreamed."
"What Krycek is, is a damn fine actor. He sulks a little, bats his eyelashes,
wiggles his ass, and you and Mulder just fall at his feet. " She laughed and
shook her head. "God, that's sad."
"What's sad, Scully, is the way your life has gone into the toilet," Skinner
came back, irritation at her last observation beginning to edge his tone. "Do
yourself a big favor and get some help," he advised the woman through clenched
teeth. "You need it."
Scully watched the man who used to be her boss stalk out of the lab. Ripping the
glasses off of her face, she threw them down onto the desk and cursed loudly,
drawing the attention of a few people. The onlookers returned to their work
quickly, dismissing the outburst.
Slouching in her seat, she snatched at the glasses, sliding them violently, back
and forth across the desk.
"Bastard," she whispered. "Bastards. All of 'em."
"Yes, Kim?"
"Sir... uh... Agent Mulder would like to see you. Is... is that all right?"
"Yes, it's fine. Send him in."
The side door to Skinner's office opened, and Fox walked in with a small grin
glued to his face. He closed the door and approached the A.D.'s desk.
"She thinks I'm unstable," Fox announced matter of factly.
"She wouldn't be too far off," Skinner replied by way of a good natured insult.
He motioned to Fox's regular seat. "What can I do for you?"
"Nothing, I just... I wanted to thank you again for taking Alex to meet me at the
airport."
Skinner nodded. "Did you two talk?"
"Yeah. Took a while but everything's fine." Fox smiled. "Better than fine."
The older man nodded. "Good. He was pretty wigged out the night before."
"I know. Sorry I got mad at you for telling him." Fox laughed softly to himself.
"I guess I shouldn't have put you in the position where you had to even try."
"It's all right," Skinner assured the other man. "You needed somebody's help."
He was silent for a second then heaved a quick breath. "I saw Scully earlier. I
went down to the lab looking for her."
Fox's expression went blank. "What for?"
"To see how she was."
Fox looked down at his knee, brushing away an invisible speck of lint.
"So?"
"I don't know how it happened, when or where, but she's turned into someone I
don't recognize. Bitter. Angry. She can't or won't see that it's her own fault
the she is where she is."
"Let me guess," Fox broke in. "She blames all of her crap on Alex."
"Mostly. She's also not too happy with either of us."
"Well, I know she was pissed at me, but you too?"
Skinner answered truthfully.
"She thinks we're a couple of besotted fools, mooning over Krycek, and he's
using it to his sinister advantage."
One golden-brown eyebrow arched ever so slightly, and Skinner held one hand up
in defense.
"She said it. Maybe not in those exact words, but it's definitely what she
meant."
"I'd be the first one to admit that I moon over Alex... "
Skinner remained silent.
"I've said this to you before," Fox told the older man. "I know. I... the pull is
incredible. Alex has got his own gravitational field."
Skinner snorted softly in careful agreement.
"I'm sorry it's sucked you in. I know the feeling well, and I know how it can
drive you crazy."
"I'm fine," Skinner assured the other man. "And though I've told you before, I
hope you really know that I would never... "
"I know," Fox broke in. "I just wanted you to know that I understand that it
can't be the easiest thing, being around him... us."
"I meant it when I said to you that I want to consider you friends."
Fox smiled and nodded. "Okay, friend. Maybe you'd like to come down for dinner
one night soon. Alex is a hell of a cook."
"No kidding?"
"Yeah. Shocked me too."
"Yeah, I'd... I'd like that. You don't think he'd mind?"
"I can check with him and get back to you if that'll make you more comfortable,"
Fox offered, "but I really think he'd be glad to have you over. His opinion of
you seems to have changed as much as your opinion of him."
Skinner sat motionless for a moment then nodded once.
"All right then."
Fox rose from his seat, and Skinner followed his lead, taking the hand his agent
offered.
"Thanks again."
"Any time."
Fox released the older man's hand and exited the office, smiling and nodding at
the wide-eyed secretary as he passed. When he disappeared from her sight, she
folded her arms across her chest and turned her attention to the closed door.
Agent Mulder smiling, where just a few days ago he was furious to the point of
being homicidal.
Skinner, bruised right after his meeting with the maniac Mulder but clearly
unwilling to do anything about the assault. Now he was acting as though nothing
had happened, and he and Mulder were all happy with each other.
Scully.
Gone.
Transferred to the lab, and not cheerfully.
"Okay," she muttered, staring at the door as if expecting it to answer her.
"What the hell is going on around here?"
Fox plucked a cashew nut from the dish on the coffee table and fed it to the man
lounging in his arms.
"I told him you wouldn't mind."
Alex shrugged, licking the salt from his lover's fingers before releasing them.
"Hey, if he's not afraid that I'm going to poison him... "
Fox chuckled, reaching again toward the dish.
"I'm glad we're able to be friends."
"Yeah, me too... I can't remember the last time I had a friend."
Fox hugged the younger man to him. "I'm your friend."
"Yeah." Alex reached up, threading his fingers through his lover's hair. "You're
my friend." He chuckled softly. "My butt buddy." He broke into loud laughter as
Fox tapped his forehead with the tips of his fingers.
"I couldn't let it go by," he giggled, acknowledging the wordless admonition.
"Very cute."
Still giggling, Alex turned in Fox's arms and planted a kiss on his chin.
"I am, aren't I?"
Fox couldn't suppress his laughter.
"Yes, you are."
Alex stretched up for a soft kiss then turned around, again resting his back
against Fox's chest.
"So, when do you want to have him over?"
"Whenever you want."
"I'll figure out a menu then let you know."
"'Kay." Fox went quiet for a minute then spoke again. "He saw Scully today."
"... Yeah?"
"Yeah. He said she's got some serious issues."
"Well, we knew this."
"Yeah, I know, but." Fox blew out a heavy sigh. "I guess I kinda sorta hoped
that she'd show some kind of remorse. Just the tiniest bit. Something that
said she was snapping out of this insanity she's got herself wrapped up in... "
Alex arched his neck, looking up into his lover's face.
"I'm sorry, Fox."
Fox nodded, giving the younger man a tiny smile. "S'okay. " He dusted the tip of
Alex's nose with his lips. "She should see somebody about it, you know?"
"She's not going to. Not if she thinks there's nothing wrong with her."
"I don't understand how she can't realize. She'd never given me the slightest
clue, Alex. Never. Even when I had just found you in L.A., and I was back and
forth on the phone with her. Yeah, she was anxious, and yeah, she gave me a bad
time about it, but she never gave me reason to believe that she'd go this far
around the bend."
"She didn't seem to get really crazy until after she saw me." Alex shrugged.
"Neither did Skinner." He looked up at the older man. "Or you."
Fox cocked his head and thought about it.
"You're right." Fox grinned. "Just sort of proves my point."
"Point?"
"Yeah." Fox traced the bottom swell of Alex's lip with his thumb. "About you
having your own gravitational field."
"My own what?"
"It was part of the conversation Skinner and I had earlier."
"Uhhh huh."
"It's true. It's also damn near impossible to resist. I can't fault Skinner or
Scully for being drawn to you. How could I, knowing how being near you affects
me? You make me crazy." He tightened an arm around the other man's chest. "But
my understanding of their attraction only goes so far. It stops at either of
them touching, or in Scully's case, hurting you in any way.
"We'd been through so much... I thought that she and I would be friends forever,
and I hate that we're done, but she did it. She ended it. I can't ever forgive
her for what she did to you."
"Even if she does get the help that she refuses right now to admit she needs?"
"I don't... I... " Fox stammered, wondering if he could. "What she did, Alex... it was
cold and calculating and... "
"No worse than anything I've ever done, and you got past all that."
Fox open and closed his mouth, not knowing at first how to answer. Then, "Yeah,
but... the situations... they're entirely different. Scully was my best friend. You
and I had no relationship. Well... not exactly true, but nothing approaching
friendship."
Alex was quiet for a while then turned to look at the older man. Curling the
fingers of one hand into Fox's hair, he kissed the pouting lips then drew back
to again see his lover's eyes.
"If you ever want to try and forgive her, I'll understand."
Fox's mouth curved into a half smile, and he tenderly stroked the side of Alex's
face.
"I love you."
The two engaged in a long kiss, and Alex again nestled into Fox's embrace. They
spent the rest of the evening cuddling and talking, and when they finally turned
in a little before eleven, Alex curled himself around Fox, and both men fell
almost immediately into a deep, contented sleep, dreaming of the wonderful,
normal life that was finally within their grasp.
Several weeks later
"Another excellent meal, Alex."
"Thanks. I found the recipe on the internet. You guys were my guinea pigs."
Skinner picked up his wine glass and drained its contents.
"No complaints here."
Alex turned to his conspicuously silent lover, noting the far away look in his
eyes.
"Fox?"
"... .Hmm?"
"Was the food okay?"
"What? Oh. Yeah. Yeah, it was great." Fox reached for Alex's hand and drew it to
his mouth for a quick kiss. "I'm sorry babe. Guess I'd zoned out for a minute
there."
Alex gave Fox's hand an understanding squeeze then returned his attention to
Skinner.
"We still all set for tomorrow?"
"Yeah," Skinner answered, playing with his empty glass. "Scully's at Quantico
all day, and Simmons will be ready for you at seven."
Fox nodded. "Thanks for getting rid of her tomorrow. I know she's not your
problem anymore."
"No problem. She doesn't need to know your business."
Silence, then Alex cleared his throat and spoke up.
"So. Dessert?"
"Oh, God," Skinner groaned. "How can I eat dessert after stuffing myself like I
did?" He looked up at Alex over the tops of his glasses. "What is it?"
"Peach dumplings with brandy cream."
Skinner groaned again and let his head fall back against his chair. "It's so
good," Fox said, adding to Skinner's temptation.
Alex's head snapped around, and he leveled a suspicious gaze on the other man.
"How would you know?"
"Me?" Fox squeaked. "Oh. I... uh... tried some... just a taste!" he added as if that
last bit of information would keep Alex from killing him.
"A taste, huh?"
"Just a tiny taste," Fox promised, holding his index finger and thumb only
centimeters apart.
Tossing the older man an exasperated glare, Alex rose from his seat and looked
down at Skinner.
"So, how 'bout it?"
"Yeah, what the hell? I guess an extra half hour in the gym for the next few
days won't kill me."
Smiling, Alex headed toward the kitchen, leaving the other two men alone.
"You guys really have to stop inviting me down here to eat," Skinner complained.
"I've been the same weight for eighteen years, but I can see that changing in a
big hurry if I keep eating Alex's cooking."
"He likes having more than one test subject for all these experiments of his."
"He's definitely got the touch."
"Yeah, he does. Oh, listen. While I'm thinking about it... I'm going to take
tomorrow off. I think I should stay home... you know?"
"Yeah. Oh, yeah. I understand."
"Sorry I didn't give you more notice. I should've said something earlier than
this."
"It's okay. You go ahead and take the day off. Have a nice, long weekend, and
I'll see you on Monday."
Fox nodded.
"Thanks."
Skinner's eyes shifted to the left and watched as Alex walked toward them
bearing a large tray.
"God, that does look good," Skinner murmured, taking a plate and cup of coffee
from the lowered tray.
Alex turned next to Fox, who finished emptying the tray, then he set it aside
and joined the others. Before he could put the first forkful of his dessert into
his mouth, Fox's voice sounded in complaint.
"Hey. How come I get the one with the piece missing?"
"Are you kidding me?" Alex asked, not waiting for an answer. "That's the one you
took the tiny little taste from," he went on, holding his thumb and forefinger
apart in imitation of Fox's earlier description.
Fox snorted and dug into his dumpling while a baritone chuckle drifted across
the table.
Alex grinned into his coffee cup as Fox pouted over his quickly disappearing
dessert, waiting until the older man's plate was clean before slicing off a
chunk of his own dumpling and lifting it to his lover's mouth.
Skinner watched, shaking his head as Fox stopped sulking and happily took Alex's
offering.
"You're spoiling him, you know. As if he wasn't a big enough pain in the ass."
"I know," Alex sighed, watching Fox with adoring eyes. "What can I say? I'm a
sap in love."
Fox rewarded the statement with a lingering kiss then pulled away and accepted
more of Alex's dessert.
Skinner watched for a brief moment then lowered his eyes, sighing softly to
himself.
They were perfect together. It was as plain as the nose on Mulder's face, and
though he still felt a tiny pang of jealousy when he watched them acting like
this, he was becoming more and more used to the constant and blatant displays of
affection between the two. And truth be told, he was happy. Happy for Mulder and
happier for Krycek that they'd found such bliss.
Another half hour went by, and Skinner rose from the table, announcing that it
was time he took his leave. His friends bid him goodnight, and he made his exit,
thanking Alex again for an excellent meal.
Fox shut the door and turned, smiling at Alex.
"He says you're going to make him fat."
Alex returned the smile but said nothing. He approached his still lover and
wound his arms around his neck.
"I'll take it as a compliment."
Fox leaned in, kissing the younger man thoroughly before pulling back a bit to
lick gently at his lips.
"You taste like that peach thing."
Alex laughed softly and kissed the tip of Fox's nose.
"You're nervous, arenıt you?"
"Nervous? What... nah. What's to be nervous about?"
"You were a million miles away, earlier."
"Doesn't mean I'm nervous."
Alex sighed heavily and laid his head against Fox's shoulder.
"I am."
Fox hugged the other man tightly to him.
"Just try to relax," he instructed softly, stroking Alex's back.
Alex nodded silently then looked over at the table.
"Guess we should get that cleaned up."
"Okay."
Taking Alex's hand, Fox walked over to the table and began helping clear away
the dinner dishes. Almost an hour later, everything was back in place, and the
two retired to the bedroom, where Fox stripped Alex of his clothing and lay him
face down on their bed. He then rid himself of his own clothes and proceeded to
give the younger man a thorough, soothing massage. A long while later, he
carefully prepared them both then stretched out along the length of Alex's
relaxed body, and entered it slowly.
Moaning, Alex began to stir, but gentle hands held him still.
"Don't move," Fox whispered, his lips tickling the outer edges of Alex's ear.
"Just relax. Let me take care of you."
To Alex's intense pleasure, Fox did just that. Timing each caress, each thrust
to take him fraction by fraction to the heaven he'd only ever reached with this
man. And when Fox finally reached beneath him to wrap his fingers around his
cock, Alex sobbed joyfully, his muscles contracting with each stroke until they
seized violently in that final moment of shared ecstasy.
Buried deep inside the convulsing body of his lover, Fox shuddered
uncontrollably, crying out Alex's name just once before collapsing on top of his
back. Both men lay motionless for a while, then Fox drew a shaky breath and
lifted himself away from the younger man.
Removing his own condom, he gently rolled Alex onto his back and slid his off as
well. He disposed of the used latex and retreated to the bathroom, reappearing
several seconds later.
Alex moaned in pleasure at the sensation of a warm cloth caressing his spent
cock, and then all too soon it was gone. He was about to complain about the
chill he now felt, but he was silenced by the heavy warmth that had just settled
itself on top of him. His arms slid up and around Fox's back, and he rubbed his
face into his lover's hair.
"Love you."
Fox smiled at the softly moaned endearment and kissed Alex's collarbone. "I love
you, baby," he countered then closed his eyes, preparing to drift into sleep.
And just as he felt the familiar lethargy relax his muscles and deepen his
breathing, Alex's voice cut through the gathering fog.
"Fox."
"... Hmm?"
"It's gonna be okay tomorrow, right?"
Fox lifted his head and looked down into exquisite emerald eyes, shadowed with
uncertainty and something resembling sadness.
"Yes."
Confident, one-word answer. Strong eye contact. Couldn't get more definite than
that. Yet Fox's heart fluttered at the remotest thought that maybe it wouldn't
be okay. And he prayed that Alex couldn't feel it. He needed Fox's strength and
absolute conviction, and nothing less would be acceptable.
A tiny smile twitched at one corner of Alex's mouth as he reached up to stroke
his lover's cheek.
"As if you'd actually say no."
"I believe in fate, Alex. We found each other for a reason, and we went through
hell to get to where we are right now. It's our time. Nothing else is going to
get in our way. I promise."
Alex pulled Fox back down, hugging the older man to his chest.
"God, I love you so much."
Fox strung a trail a warm kisses along his lover's shoulder then tucked his head
under the younger man's chin.
"We should get some sleep."
"I know," Alex murmured, currently engrossed in the feel of Fox's hair sliding
between his fingers as he combed the thick strands away from the other man's
forehead. Iım not sure I'm going to be able to any time soon, but... "
Less than ten minutes later, Alex was out.
And Fox wasn't.
He lay listening to the slowing thud of his lover's heart, hoping it would lull
him to sleep, but his mind wouldn't stop working. He believed the brief speech
he'd given Alex only minutes ago... mostly. It was their time. In fact they were
long overdue for some uninterrupted happiness.
But...
But nothing. Don't start thinking like Alex, now. Just keep a positive
outlook, and in a few days you'll see that everything is fine, just like you
told him.
Mental pep talk over, Fox closed his eyes and settled in for a good night's
sleep.
Ten minutes went by. Twenty. Alex slumbered peacefully, his only movement the
occasional flutter of his eyelashes.
Half an hour. Forty-five minutes. An abbreviated sigh drifted through the still
air, and Fox opened his eyes, staring into the darkness and listening.
Silence.
Alex was still fast asleep. Good. Fox had been afraid that the younger man would
lie awake all night worrying. Instead it appeared that he would be the one
tossing and turning.
Fox sighed inwardly and waited for sun to come up.
Alex's hand slammed down on the shrilling alarm clock, and an immediate frown
came to his face. Without having to look, he knew he was alone in the big bed.
As his senses came more into focus, he realized that he could hear water running
in the bathroom. Groaning softly, he flipped onto his back and tucked his hands
behind his head, waiting.
Well, here it was. Either the first day of the rest of their lives, or the
beginning of the end.
None of that now. It's all gonna work out fine. Fox promised.
The water stopped running, and a few minutes later, Fox walked into the bedroom.
Alex smiled as he took in the damp, tousled hair and mostly naked body draped
loosely in a thick bath towel.
"Morning."
Fox looked up and smiled at the man lying amidst the pile of rumpled pillows.
"Hey. How long've you been awake?"
"Not long."
Fox approached the bed, hoping that the Visine had done its job well enough to
keep Alex from realizing how little rest he'd gotten.
"How'd you sleep?" Alex asked, reaching out to stroke Fox's arm.
"Fine. You?"
"A whole lot better than I'd expected to."
"Good. I thought maybe you'd stay awake worrying."
"Nope." Alex took Fox's hand, squeezing gently. "You said everything was going
to be fine."
Fox looked down into trusting, adoring eyes, and he brought Alex's hand to his
mouth, kissing the warm skin.
"Yeah, I did. Didn't think you were listening all that closely."
"I was. I always listen to you."
Wish I listened to me...
"Gonna get up now?"
Nodding, Alex pulled his hand from Fox's and pushed the sheet back.
Fox stepped back and watched as his lover swung his legs over the side of the
mattress then boosted himself to his feet. Long fingers briskly combed this way
and that through the wild sable hair as Alex attempted to pass by, but Fox
reached out, snaking an arm around the younger man's waist and pulled him close.
Alex chuckled softly as the older man nuzzled his throat.
"Fox, come on. We don't have any time for... "
"I know," Fox interrupted. "But you're just irresistible in the morning."
"In the morning?"
"Okay, all the time," Fox amended his last statement. "But I needed a quick
reason, and that was the first one I thought of."
Shaking his head, Alex brushed his lips along Fox's jaw before breaking from his
embrace and moving off toward the bathroom.
Fox watched the delicious sway of his lover's ass until it disappeared from the
room, then he turned and got dressed, wrestling his underwear and jeans on over
the erection that had begun to blossom the minute Alex had thrown the sheet back
from his naked body. Any other morning, he would have followed that pretty ass
back into the bathroom and given it a vigorous workout in the shower, but Alex
was right. They had no time this morning. Maybe after they got back...
Now fully clothed, he wandered into the living room, where he fed the fish then
looked around for some thing else to do. But living with a fastidious, eerily
efficient man left him nothing to clean, stack, put away...
All righty.
Fox retreated to the kitchen and pulled the bottle of orange juice from the
refrigerator. Locating a tall glass, he filled it almost to the top and began to
chug the contents down when Alex entered the room.
"There you are." The younger man took the glass from his lover and drank down
half of the remaining contents then handed the glass back. "Not much time for
breakfast. Hope you're not too hungry."
"No," Fox answered, kissing Alex's cold mouth. "I figured we could stop
somewhere after we left Hoover."
"Okay." Alex looked at his watch and smiled up at the older man. "Guess we
should get going soon."
"Yeah," Fox answered. "Simmons was nice enough to go in early to do this. The
least we can do is be on time, I suppose."
Finishing his juice, Fox placed the glass in the sink and filled it with water
as Alex had been repeatedly instructing him to do. The act garnered an approving
smile from the other man.
"And I didn't even have to remind you," Alex said proudly, rubbing his lover's
back.
"I guess there's hope for me, huh?" Fox asked, returning the grin.
"Yep. Next, we're going to work on getting you to wash them."
"I don't know," Fox moaned, watching Alex quickly wash the glass and put it in
the dish rack. "I think you're asking an awful lot."
"I promise it won't hurt," Alex chuckled, placing a hand at the base of Fox's
spine and guiding him into the living room. "Now let's get out of here and get
this over with."
Several minutes later, the couple was in Fox's car and on their way to FBI
headquarters. The ride was a relatively quiet one with each man lost in his own
thoughts. But upon arrival they became more animated, chatting and laughing,
unconsciously trying to put each other at ease as they moved quickly toward the
lab.
As they entered the large room, Agent Simmons looked up from his preparations
and gave them a warm smile.
"Good morning, gentlemen."
"Morning, Simmons." Fox reached out to shake the other man's hand. "Hope we
haven't kept you waiting too long."
"Nah. Only been here about ten minutes."
"I really appreciate you doing this."
"No problem. I've done it for a few other agents and their partners, myself
included."
The other agent cocked his head curiously. "Oh. I... I didn't know... "
Simmons shrugged. "Well, you know. It's something I keep private." He looked
from Fox to Alex. "For the same reasons you obviously have. Hi. I'm Charlie
Simmons."
Alex took the outstretched hand and gave it a firm shake.
"Alex Krycek. Thanks."
"Like I said, no problem. Well, I'm all set here, so we can get this show on the
road. Who wants to go first?"
Immediately, Fox removed his jacket and began rolling up his sleeve.
"Guess I will."
Alex watched silently as the tech took his lover's blood, and a hot pain
squeezed his chest. He tried for all he was worth to conceal what he was
feeling, but Fox recognized the regret that clouded his eyes, and the older man
reached out with his free hand and tenderly stroked his cheek.
"Hey."
Alex focused on the beautiful mixture of green and gold in front of him. Fox
mouthed the words I love you, and he inhaled deeply, letting the sentiment seep
in and infuse him with the strength he needed to work through the emotion that
threatened to overtake him. He squared his shoulders, stood a little taller, and
smiled at the older man, nodding. Fox winked at him as Simmons removed the
needle, and as the tech completed his first task, Alex moved closer, needing
just to feel his lover's warmth.
"I hate needles," he whispered, still smiling.
Fox's eyes grew wider for a moment, then he frowned curiously.
"You said you got tested all the time. And when you were with the Bureau, you
had to have had inoculations and whatnot."
"Yeah. Didn't mean I liked it. But I knew I had to do it, so I did."
Fox shook his head and leaned in, kissing Alex's slightly pale lips.
"Want to hold my hand?"
"And if I'm a good boy, Simmons'll give me a lollipop?'
"I doubt it, but I'm sure I can come up with something for you."
Alex laughed at the leering suggestion and rolled up his sleeve.
"I'm sure you can."
He took his place in front of Simmons, who had been waiting quietly during their
brief conversation and, despite his wish not to appear childish, grasped Fox's
hand and held tightly to it. Seconds later it was done, and he allowed the blood
to return to Fox's fingers.
"How'd you ever get through stuff like this before?" Fox laughed, shaking his
hand.
"Wasn't easy, I'll tell you," Alex breathed. "Hope I didn't hurt your hand."
"Oh no," Fox mumbled, flexing his cramped fingers. "The feeling's starting to
come back now, I think."
"Sorry."
"S'okay," Fox whispered, giving the younger man a light peck on his lips. "You
can crush my bones any time you need to." He turned his attention to the third
man.
"Thanks again, Simmons. When do you think you'll have the results?"
"Call me on Monday, about mid afternoon. I'll have it for you." Simmons handed a
card to Fox, who immediately gave it to Alex for safe keeping.
"Talk to you on Monday," Fox said, shaking the tech's hand, and then he backed
away to let Alex move between them.
"Thanks," Alex offered softly, taking the other man's proffered hand.
"Sure. As one who's been in your shoes, I know it's pointless to say but, try to
just put this out of your mind and enjoy your weekend."
"We'll try."
Alex released the other man's hand and stepped back, now standing shoulder to
shoulder with Fox. The older man slipped an arm around his waist and, nodding to
the smiling tech, turned and steered him toward the door.
Once in the hall and on their way back out of the building, they took no notice
of the one who had quickly skittered into the shadows to watch them exit the
lab.
"What the hell are you two doing here?" Scully whispered, stepping into the
light once the couple had disappeared from her sight. The lab door opened again,
and she hastily backed into the corner she'd been hiding in. She watched Agent
Simmons lock the door and walk off in the direction of the elevators and,
hearing the doors open and close, she against crept out into the light. Waiting
a few seconds to make sure that no one would return, she quickly unlocked the
door and slipped inside the lab.
"Yes... .yes, sir... I... I know, sir. I'll make sure of it... well... oh... oh, really? Well,
isn't that nice? Yes, I'm sure she was. Yes, sir. I'll... I'll look forward to it.
All right... no, I won't forget. Yes. You have a good day, sir."
Skinner dropped the phone in it's cradle and clasped his hands to his head.
"Christ."
Looking at his watch, he cursed aloud and bolted out his office door, slamming
it behind him.
Blue eyes scanned the contents of Simmons' desk carefully, looking for clues as
to why Mulder and Krycek might have been there. Finding nothing on the metal
surface, Scully began opening drawers. Nothing but old files and reports in the
first. In the second...
"Life savers, yo yo... Martha Stewart's Living? Okay... "
She shut the drawer carefully and moved on to the next one. Right there on top,
she found a folder with the name A. Krycek printed at the upper right hand
corner. Beneath that one, another folder with F. Mulder in the same location.
Red eyebrows drew down into the curious frown as she placed both folders on the
desk and flipped them open.
"Ohhh," she murmured, scanning the contents quickly. "So that's why they were
sneaking in and out of here so early in the morning."
Quickly, she shut the folders and replaced them. Glancing around the room as if
to insure that no one else was there, she trotted into the next room, praying
all the way.
Skinner boarded the elevator and sank back against the wall, closing his eyes.
Holy Christ, whatever made him agree to look at the Director's pictures of his
granddaughter's dance recital? Well, what the hell could he say, really? What
made the man even think he'd be interested?
A.D. Morgan and the Deputy Director were probably falling over themselves,
gushing about the kid.
Ass kissers.
Uh huh, and you're not going to go into his office and look through all
hundred and eighty-nine pictures and tell him what a little doll his only
granddaughter is.
Shaking his head, he reached forward and pressed the third button. The elevator
began to move, and his thoughts went to the men whom the Director's unexpected
call probably stopped him from meeting up with in the lab.
One last hurdle to get over, and it looked as though they might actually be home
free.
A tiny smile touched Skinner's lips at the thought. He'd never dreamed in a
million years that he would take such a big interest in someone else's
happiness, let alone Alex Krycek's, but there it was. Past forgotten. Lust held
tightly in check. And now he found himself with something he hadn't had in
years. Friends.
Felt good.
The elevator stopped, and he stepped into the hall, walking in the direction of
the lab. There wasn't any detectable sound coming from inside, but how much
noise would there be, he supposed.
Opening the door, he was immediately greeted by a small commotion in the next
room.
"Simmons?"
No answer.
He began to move in the direction of the sounds but before he could reach the
door, Scully emerged, look terribly startled.
"What are you doing here?" Skinner asked, looking past the woman at the doorway.
"I work here," Scully shot back, trying to brazen her way out of potential
trouble.
"You're supposed to be going to Quantico today."
"I am going, but I forgot some notes," she explained as icily as her trembling
voice would allow.
Skinner again looked past Scully then scanned the room.
"Is anybody else here?"
"Who'd be here at this ungodly hour of the morning?"
Skinner gave no response.
"But you obviously thought someone would be, or you wouldn't be here," Scully
continued. "I heard you call Simmons' name when you came in."
"Yeah, I... I thought I saw him in the hall earlier this morning, and I came down
to ask him a question."
"Anything I can answer?"
"No. You should get going or you'll be late."
Clutching a stack of folders to her chest, Scully nodded and brushed by the
A.D., blowing out a silent breath of relief as she exited the room.
Shit, that was close. If he hadn't made any noise when he came in...
Forget about 'if'. You made it out of there with your ass in tact. And what
very well could be just the thing you've been waiting for.
Smiling broadly, Scully hefted her files higher against her chest, and headed
for her car.
"Where have you been?"
The package of Ho Ho's fell out of Simmons' mouth, and he had to do some pretty
fast juggling to keep all of the coffee from spilling out of the two cups he
held.
"Uh... " He placed the now half full cups down on the nearest table and raced over
to the sink to grab a roll of paper towels. "... I w-was down in the cafeteria." He
stopped mopping up the spilled coffee and eyed Skinner curiously. "How'd you get
in here... uh... sir?"
"The door was open."
"Open?" Simmons looked at the door then back at the A.D. "No... no, I... I always lock
it behind me."
"Agent Scully was here."
"She was? I thought she was supposed to be at... "
"Quantico. Yes. She said she forgot some notes, and I found her in here. But no
one else."
Reading the other man's meaning, Simmons nodded. "They were here, sir. I'm going
to get going on the tests in just a little bit."
Silently cursing himself and the Director, Skinner nodded.
"All right, then. How long will it take?"
"I'll have the results for them on Monday afternoon."
"That's the soonest you can do it?"
"Yes, sir."
"Fine." Skinner turned to leave then stopped and looked back at the other man.
"Thank you, Simmons, for coming in so early to do this."
"No problem, sir. Like I said to them, I understand their desire for privacy."
Skinner nodded again and left the lab, leaving the tech to heave a long breath
and search out a wet mop for his now sticky floor.
"I'll have a tall stack of buttermilk pancakes, side of Canadian bacon, two eggs
scrambled... "
Fox watched in amusement as Alex continued with his breakfast order.
"... Uh... home fries and a large glass of orange juice."
Shaking her head and grinning, the waitress asked if that was all.
"Yeah, that'll do it for me." Alex looked to the man seated across from him.
"What're you gonna have?"
Fox ordered a couple of eggs over hard, bacon, wheat toast and orange juice.
When the young woman had gone, he rested his cheek in his palm and stared at
Alex, chuckling softly.
"What?" Alex asked. "I said I was hungry."
"Yeah, you did. I find it hard to believe you're going to eat all that, though."
The younger man tossed him a smile and a careless shrug and said nothing.
"You looked about ready to pass out when Simmons stuck that needle in you," Fox
observed. "I didn't think you'd be at all hungry after that."
"First of all, I wasn't ready to pass out," Alex pointed out quickly. "Nowhere
near it. And second... " He took in a long breath and let it out. "I feel a lot
better now that it's done. Confident." His eyes sparkled a brilliant green. "You
know?"
Fox gave his lover a sweet smile. "Yeah. Yeah, babe, I know. So," he said,
changing the subject. "What do you want to do today?"
Alex gave the older man a curious tilt of his head. "Are you not going in to
work at all today?"
"Nope. Gonna enjoy a long weekend with you."
"You're too good to me."
"I'm good to me, too. " Fox's gaze grew smoky. "I love being with you." He
reached out and stroked the back of Alex's hand. "You know that."
"I know." Alex flipped his hand, holding Fox's in a secure grip and bringing it
to his mouth. "God, I love you." He drew his tongue lightly over the velvety
surface. "And I want you so much."
"Like... right now?" Fox asked, letting his thumb rasp over Alex's hand.
"Mmm hmm. Or," Alex continued, watching the waitress approach with their juice,
"as soon as I can possibly have you."
"Here you go, guys. I'll be back soon with your food."
The waitress set the two glasses down in front of the men then bounced off in
the direction of the kitchen.
"Won't take that long for breakfast," Fox murmured when she had gone, his tone
dropping to match Alex's low rumble. "Then I'm all yours."
A hint of a smile slanted one corner of Alex's mouth.
"All mine?"
Staring intently, Fox nodded.
Sighing heavily, Alex shifted position in his chair to accommodate his
ever-growing erection.
"You may regret having said that."
"Never," Fox stated simply, not taking his eyes off of the man in front of him.
A soft growl rolled in Alex's throat, and he shifted again.
"I'm so hard right now, it hurts."
"I'm sorry baby," Fox whispered, leveling a smoldering stare on the other man.
"When we get home, I'll make you feel better."
"Damn right you will," Alex murmured as their breakfast now made its way toward
them.
Fox chuckled, watching the server place Alex's food in front of him.
"That sounded a bit... " He paused, searching for the right word. "Demanding... "
"Call it anything you like."
Fox writhed in his seat, his lashes half covering the glittering green and amber
of his eyes.
"I can't begin to tell you how turned on I am right now."
"Well, it's going to have to keep," Alex said, smiling up at the waitress as she
finally reached them.
"Here we are, fellas," the girl announced as she began to unload the contents of
the large tray onto the table. "Hope you're still hungry."
Alex's eyes left the server and drifted over to Fox. The heat of his stare
warmed the older man inside and out.
"Very hungry."
With everything now on the table, Alex thanked the server then turned his full
attention back to Fox, who was eyeing his lover's breakfast.
"That's a lot of food."
"Yeah, I guess it is."
The older man smirked at him. "Well, dig in."
Alex returned the grin and began attacking his pancakes. Halfway through, his
enthusiasm hadn't diminished, and Fox watched, chuckling softly.
"You're not going to be able to move after all that."
"I'll be able to move well enough to take care of you," Alex promised, setting
Fox's simmering desires up to a slow boil.
"That sounds a bit menacing," Fox mumbled, a challenging gleam appearing in his
eyes.
"Menacing? Me? I'm a pussy cat," Alex drawled, fully expecting the dubious stare
his proclamation provoked.
"You don't believe me," he accused, doing his level best to look hurt.
"I didn't say that."
"You didn't have to."
"I know how sweet you can be," Fox said in an exaggeratedly soothing voice. Then
suddenly his tone changed. "And I also know wicked you can be. Today, I'm hoping
for wicked."
The mock pout faded, and Alex favored his lover with a salacious grin.
"You're in luck."
Fox squirmed in anticipation, moaning at the thoughts that danced in his head.
"Finish your breakfast," Alex instructed softly. "Then we'll go home and play."
Eager to take Alex up on his promise, Fox finished his food without any more
conversation. His plate now mostly clean, he sat quietly sipping his juice,
waiting until Alex pushed his own dishes away to speak.
"Ready now?"
Smiling his answer, Alex summoned the waitress as soon as she was within
earshot. He paid the tab, left the girl a generous tip, then took Fox's hand and
led the way out of the restaurant. As they walked toward the car, he slid his
hand downward, stroking and massaging his lover's rear.
Fox giggled softly. "People could be watching, you know."
"And?"
"You want to offend some old lady's fine sensibilities?"
"If some old lady sees me squeezing your ass and continues to watch, maybe her
sensibilities aren't so fine after all."
Fox began to laugh then emitted a surprised yelp as Alex swatted his ass
soundly. The younger man opened the passenger's side door for him and watched,
pleased as he rubbed the injured area before taking his seat.
Alex shut the door and rounded the front of the car, feeling his lover's heated
gaze follow him. He opened his own door and dropped down behind the wheel.
"That hurt."
The younger man tossed Fox a self-satisfied grin.
"It was supposed to."
"What'd I do?"
"Nothing." Alex reached over to stroke his lover's thigh as he started the car.
"I just couldn't resist. You're not complaining, are you Fox?"
"No," Fox answered quickly, his answer a soft mumble.
"Are you sure?" Alex asked as he put the car in gear and pulled onto the street.
Once he was able to steer with one hand, the other again went to Fox's thigh,
moving in long strokes up and down its length.
"I'm sure," Fox breathed, gasping softly as Alex's knuckles brushed the
considerable bulge in his pants.
"In fact, you liked it, didn't you?"
"... Yes."
"You want more."
"Yes."
"Yes, what?"
"I want more," Fox moaned, arching his hips in search of greater contact.
"I know you do," Alex purred, pressing harder against the older man's crotch.
"Ask me for it."
Fox whimpered, writhing against the now firm pressure.
"Ask me, Fox."
"Please," Fox whispered, unable to keep his eyes open. "Would... would you give me
some more?"
"Yes, baby." Alex gently teased his lover's concealed cock with his knuckles.
"I'll give you more. And you'll take it all... won't you?"
"Yes," Fox answered, panting now and unsure of exactly what Alex meant by 'all',
but ready and very willing to find out.
"God, you're fucking gorgeous," Alex moaned, his eyes flicking from the road to
the other man's aroused features. "I'm fighting every urge right now to pull
over, drag you into the back seat, and fuck the hell out of you."
A brief sob escaped past Fox's parted lips, and he brought one hand down over
Alex's, silently urging the younger man to squeeze his cock. But Alex resisted,
pulling his hand away.
"No."
"But... "
"You're too worked up. You'll ending up coming before we can get home, and that
wouldn't be good at all."
"I won't," Fox promised breathlessly. "Please, Alex. God, please touch me."
Alex thought for a moment, then a slow smile curved his lips.
"Have you got your cuffs on you?"
"My... " Fox expelled a ragged breath. "Y-yeah, I... "
"Good. Take them out, cuff one wrist then put your hands behind your back."
Fox obeyed, still more than willing to give Alex anything he asked for. He
closed his eyes as he felt the other cuff snap efficiently around his other
wrist, and he slumped back against the seat, waiting.
Carefully, keeping his eyes on the road, Alex worked the fastenings of his
lover's jeans loose and slipped his hand inside the long slit of Fox's
underwear. The older man bucked, grunting deep in his throat as Alex gently
fingered the length of his erection.
"You're hot," Alex observed, letting his fingertips drift along the velvety
surface.
Swallowing hard against the lump in his throat, Fox merely nodded.
Alex pulled the rigid organ out of the confines of Fox's underwear, letting the
cooler air within the vehicle bathe it. Fox's head tipped to the side, and a
soft moan rolled in his throat.
"Is that better?" Alex asked, sliding two fingers through the slick pearl of
fluid that had appeared at the tip of the flushed head.
"No... n-no."
"Why not? You asked me to touch you."
"I know, but... " Fox shook his head, unable to finish his thought, and his wounded
pout made Alex's cock throb painfully. The younger man knew that to a certain
extent he was being played, but he couldn't help his reaction any more than Fox
could help being the fucking sexiest man he'd ever known.
"We're almost home," he offered with far more serenity in his tone than he
actually felt. Wedged firmly within the confines of his jeans, his cock begged
for release from its denim prison only to be trapped within a tighter, silken
heat. But he would deny himself the pleasure, knowing that it would be wilder
and all the more intense for the wait. One brief glance at Fox promised him
that.
Hands securely cuffed behind his back, Fox arched into the teasing touch, unable
to stop the needy whimpers that continually escaped his compressed lips. Had his
eyes been open, he would have seen the fire that raged in his lover's nearly
black eyes, and he would have known the full extent of his desire.
And he could have had him.
Minutes later Alex pulled into the parking garage of their building, and he cut
the motor then leaned over to nuzzle the curve of Fox's neck.
"We're home, baby," he whispered, nipping at the warm flesh and tucking the
older man's cock back into his jeans.
Fox issued a low moan, and his head tipped to one side as he blinked sluggishly.
Alex's warm presence disappeared, and he vaguely heard the car door open and
close. Before he could turn his head, his own door was opening, and gentle hands
were pulling him to his feet.
"Alex," he mumbled as the younger man began to lead him toward the elevator.
"Cuffs. The cuffs... "
"What about them?" Alex asked as he guided Fox to the doors and stopped. An
amused grin twitched at his mouth as he watched the realization hit Fox that he
had no intention of un-cuffing him. Hazel eyes became a bit more alert, and the
older man scanned the garage.
"There's nobody else here," Alex said reassuringly and pressed the button. The
doors opened immediately, and Fox's eyes widened as a young woman stepped out,
eyeing the pair warily. She noted one man's disheveled appearance and the
other's arrogant smirk, but said nothing. She stepped past the pair, almost
surprised by the darker one's softly uttered 'good afternoon'. As she turned to
respond, she saw the silver flash of handcuffs restraining the other man's
hands.
Alex smiled at the soft gasp and wide-eyed stare, and he gave Fox a gentle
shove, herding the cuffed man into the elevator. The moment they were both
inside, he grasped the front of Fox's shirt, jerking his lover against him, and
laid a hard kiss on him. The woman watched all of this, apprehension turning to
outright shock then understanding and amusement as the dark man finally released
the other's mouth, and his captive writhed against him, clearly very much into
whatever game they were obviously playing.
"'Bout time we got a little life in this stuffy place," the woman murmured as
the door closed, and she walked away, grinning from ear to ear.
Back in the elevator, Alex hit the button for their floor, and the car started
its smooth ascent as Fox pressed against him. He wound an arm around the older
man, holding him still while the other lightly stroked the curve of his ass.
"She noticed, you know."
"Noticed?"
Alex laughed softly into Fox's ear, provoking a light shudder.
"See? I provided you with a little distraction, and you didn't even care about
that woman."
The hand on Fox's rear crept in past the snug waistband of his jeans, and Alex's
tongue slithered into his ear, tickling and teasing.
"How much could you ignore if I unzipped your pants right now and jerked you
off?"
In unconscious response to the question, Fox bucked against Alex's hip. The
brief pressure created the most pleasurable tingles throughout his body. He did
it again.
"Fox... "
Ignoring the soft warning, Fox pushed forward once more, but this time a hard
swat across his ass met his attempt. He yelped sharply, stunned for only a
moment, then he dropped his head to Alex's shoulder, whimpering frantically.
Alex raised his hand to his lover's head, petting the silky, golden-brown
strands.
"I love that you're such a slut." His fingers slid down the side of Fox's face
and under his chin, lifting until he could meet his lover's hazy gaze. "And that
you're mine."
Unable to tear his eyes away from Alex's, Fox nodded. Alex leaned forward to
kiss him, but before he could feel the younger man's lips touch his, the door
opened. Alex smiled softly at him and nodded toward the now visible hall.
Taking the silent cue, Fox moved slowly out of the elevator and, with Alex at
his back, walked toward their apartment. He waited quietly as the younger man
unlocked the door, then he entered the living room. He heard the door close and
lock, and then Alex was behind him, nuzzling the back of his neck.
"I'm going to uncuff you now," Alex murmured, licking at the sensitive flesh.
"Then I'm going to undress you... "
Fox was with him so far.
"We're going to go into the bedroom, and you're going to lie down on the bed."
He bit down on the area he'd just been licking, listening to Fox's soft grunt.
"And I'm going to watch you play with yourself."
Oh, yeah. Still right there.
"But you're not going to come."
Okay, wait...
"If you do, I'm going to have to put you over my knee."
And this was supposed to be punishment, right?
"And after I've turned your ass a nice, bright shade of red, I'm going to cuff
you to the bed and... "
Oh, God. God, yeah. And...
Alex's voice hummed in Fox's ear, making him shudder.
"... not touch you for the rest of the night."
Oh, y... no. No.
Fox turned and curved his arms around Alex's neck, nuzzling the younger man's
jaw.
"You'd let me suffer all night?," he moaned, sliding the fingers of one hand
through Alex's hair. He watched the other man's eyes flutter and close as he
tenderly massaged his scalp. Pressing his fragile advantage, he kissed a slow
path along Alex's jaw and downward, working his way toward the base of his
throat. As his free hand moved to the buttons of Alex's shirt, it was swiftly
snatched away. His surprised gaze met the other's, and before he could speak,
Alex reached up and grasped his other wrist.
"What are you doing?"
The softly uttered question stole Fox's breath, and for a moment he didn't move
a fraction. Not even his eyelashes fluttered as he stood frozen in the intensity
of his lover's feral gaze.
Not actually expecting an answer, Alex tightened his hold on Fox's wrists and
jerked the other man forward. His breath and the low hum of his voice tickled
Fox's lips as he spoke.
"Get in the bedroom. Now."
His whole body throbbing with excitement, Fox stumbled backward as Alex released
him, and he walked to the bedroom.
Only a few steps behind, Alex stalked into the room and spun Fox to face him
when they reached the edge of the bed. His eyes never leaving Fox's face, he
peeled the older man's jacket away, tossing it in the general direction of the
chair, then went to work on his shirt.
Fox stood quietly while his shirt was unbuttoned and pulled from his body, but
then Alex brushed his fingertips over both erect nipples, and a tiny gasp
escaped him.
"That good?" Alex whispered. A tiny nod was his only answer, and he pressed
Fox's hands to his chest, kissing the space between them. "Go ahead," he urged
softly, taking his hands away. Sable lashes drooped, shielding his eyes as he
watched Fox's fingers begin to move, fluttering over his own nipples. His hands
dropped to the older man's jeans, popping the button then sliding the zipper
down, and as Fox continued to play with his nipples, Alex freed his cock from
his jeans and underwear. Seconds later, Fox stood completely naked before him,
hands wandering aimlessly over his chest and stomach, waiting.
"Lie down, baby," Alex croaked, and Fox obeyed, assuming a lewd sprawl over the
mattress. Glittering, amber-flecked eyes stared up at him, pleading as Fox eased
one hand from his chest and let it glide downward, finding and stroking over his
cock. Sinfully lush lips parted on a broken moan, and the older man's eyes
closed as he curled his fingers around the rigid organ and squeezed gently.
Alex stood frozen, utterly taken by the image of his lover lying in front of
him, masturbating for his pleasure. His eyes followed every movement of Fox's
long, elegant fingers as they slowly tightened and relaxed, flowing over the
stony length of muscle, again and again. He listened to the increasingly erratic
exchange of breath, and the erotic fog he lingered in cleared a bit.
"Easy," he breathed softly. "Not yet." He reached down and, passing the tip of
one finger over the head of the other man's cock, taking away the drop of
pearlized moisture, and he brought it to his mouth, his own eyes closing as he
savored the taste of his love.
Fox's eyelashes lifted in time to see Alex pulling his finger out of his mouth,
and the younger man opened his eyes at the same moment, looking down at him.
"You're going to do something for me," Alex stated quietly, reaching down and
caressing Fox's cheek.
Fox nodded, drawing in a stuttering breath. "Tell me."
"I will." Alex drew his fingers over Fox's mouth, allowing the other man to lick
the tips. "In a little while." He backed away and, followed by Fox's curious
gaze, he opened his lover's closet door and rummaged in the box at the back.
Knowing what Alex was looking for, Fox began to squirm, whimpering softly until
the younger man returned to him. The sounds he emitted grew louder, and his hips
arched upward, straining toward Alex as one by one each item was dropped on the
bed.
Blindfold... ball gag... leather flogger... fur mitt. A few of the items he had bought
while in Georgia. Aside from that day that he had come home for lunch and found
Alex waiting for him wearing the collar and not a whole lot else, they hadn't
actually found the opportunity to play with any of the items he'd purchased.
Today it appeared that Alex would take full advantage of their free weekend.
Forest-green eyes stared down at the older man as Alex rolled up his sleeves.
"Ready?"
Fox nodded. "What do you want me to do?" He gasped as Alex picked up the flogger
and drew the soft leather straps through his loosely closed fist.
"I want you to give me something."
"Anything. What do you want?"
"Control."
Fox's hand stopped moving, and his eyes dropped shut as the single word sizzled
through him like an electrical shock.
"Don't stop, baby," Alex instructed softly. "Touch yourself."
Eyes shifting back and forth between Alex's face and the object cradled in his
hands, Fox began again to stroke his cock, lightly teasing the rock-hard flesh.
His other hand traveled a bit lower, gently fondling his aching balls.
"Like this?" he whispered, both words breaking past his lips on a shaky breath.
Alex nodded. "That's good." He lowered the flogger, letting it dance over Fox's
chest and watching as goosebumps followed the trail that the strips took.
"Beautiful."
Fox flinched slightly as with a flick of his wrist, Alex let the straps slap
gently over one nipple.
"So beautiful."
Again the straps fell, but this time over the other nipple, and Fox grunted
softly at the sensation.
"Did you like that?" Alex asked, swinging the flogger back and forth so that
just the tips of the straps brushed over Fox's nipples.
Writhing beneath the teasing strokes, Fox nodded. His body jerked as the leather
came down a bit harder, and he began to beg.
"Alex," he sobbed, unconsciously squeezing his cock. "Please. It's... I can't... "
"Shhh."
Alex slid the flogger over Fox's chest and throat, bringing it up under his chin
and lifting.
"Look at me."
Fox struggled to open his eyes. Finally succeeding, he met his lover's smoky
gaze.
"I didn't bring out the cock ring."
Fox read a threat somewhere in that simple statement.
"Would you like me to?"
And there it was.
"No. Please... no."
Alex studied his lover's pained expression for a moment then gave him a hint of
a smile.
"All right."
The flogger left its resting place under Fox's chin and drifted downward,
teasing over his chest and the taut muscles of his stomach. The soft strips
reached his cock, and they lingered there, tickling and caressing, driving Fox
into a quiet frenzy. His hands shook with the effort it took for him to force
himself to slacken his grip on his cock, fighting the overwhelming urge to jerk
himself quickly to a finish. Panting heavily, he slowed his movements almost to
a stop and looked up to see his lover's pleased smile.
"Very good," Alex murmured. "I thought I had you for sure." The leather flicked
over his cock, and Fox inhaled sharply, jerking his hips upward. His hands fell
to the mattress, beside his head, clenching in the sheets, and he waited,
silently begging Alex to do it again.
Two more flicks, one after the other, and Fox's mouth fell open, allowing a low,
guttural sob to escape.
Alex's hand tightened on the handle, stopping it from shaking at the sight of
his lover, his beautiful Fox lying before him, Shuddering at his touch, moaning
and whimpering... accepting and offering the gift of incredible pleasure. He
trusted Alex in this intimate game to take him to the raw edges of satisfaction
and never a breath beyond that which would cause him real harm. That trust shone
softly in his beautiful, ever changing eyes, and it melted Alex to the core.
To have such absolute power... to have such total, unquestioning surrender...
He brushed the flogger over Fox's inner thighs and watched his muscles twitch.
To own him in every way...
Glazed eyes watched Alex's every move as he put the flogger down and picked up
the blindfold. Speaking not a word, he leaned in, brushing the tip of his nose
over Fox's before imparting a sweet kiss on his warm lips. Darkness followed as
he secured the blindfold over the older man's eyes. The ball gag followed,
fitted gently into his mouth.
Fox lay quivering but without protest as Alex's hands left him. Stillness
descended on his sensory deprived world, and he strained to hear something. The
rustle of Alex's clothing, a breath. But all was silent, and he had to wonder if
Alex had somehow left the room without him realizing it. He lay listening, hands
up by his head, restrained by instinct alone. An eternity later, softness grazed
his lower abdomen, and he twitched at the sudden caress. The sensation faded
then re-appeared, now whispering over his chest, teasing each already hard
nipple to an impossibly higher level of stiffness.
Alex brushed the fur mitt over Fox's skin, choosing each new destination
randomly. He listened to the erratic intake of breath and watched the deep
shudders of his lover's body each time he touched him, and when he was sure that
Fox was getting comfortable with the gentle, intermittent caresses, he switched
back to the flogger.
Fox jumped, grunting in surprise as dozens of long, flat fingers struck his hip
and outer thigh. His respiration, which had started to regulate with the
soothing touch of the mitt, again quickened. Alex hadn't hit him nearly hard
enough for it to hurt, but every touch was amplified and turned into a highly
erotic sensation. If he lived through this night, Fox vowed that Alex would
learn first hand exactly what it was he was feeling now... and then some.
The next strike landed over his jaw and the side of his neck, his upper thighs,
then his chest in rapid succession. The mitt immediately followed, easing the
sting of the last, slightly harder blow, and a harsh groan rolled in Fox's
chest as every nerve ending in his body pounded. His cock jumped, lifting away
from his body, and the shock of Alex's fingers encircling the base and the
younger man's tongue grazing the moistened tip sent him into violent
convulsions. A long scream gurgled in his throat, and he let go, the first burst
of semen hitting the side of Alex's face, and the rest shooting into the air and
landing on his belly and chest.
The scream faded, and Fox went limp, moaning softly as the blazing red he saw
behind his closed eyelids went black, and the frenzied state he'd been trapped
in turned to one of lethargy. His limbs became wonderfully heavy, and he felt
peaceful sleep just within his reach. The only thing missing was Alex's arms
around him, warming his cooling flesh, and his lover's soft, husky voice
resonating in his ear, telling him he was loved...
Alex smirked, licking away the bit of semen at the corner of his mouth. He moved
quietly away, retreating to the bathroom, where he ran the water in the sink to
warm, then held a washcloth under it. He wrung out the cloth, cleaning his face,
then rinsed it and returned to the bedroom.
On the verge of sleep, the feel of moist warmth brought Fox back to
consciousness. He realized quickly that Alex was washing him, and he sighed
contentedly, nestling into the pillows. Assuming that Alex would next remove the
gag and blindfold, he waited. The cloth left his skin, and then there was
nothing.
And more nothing.
Fox's head rolled on the pillow, searching blindly for the presence he could no
longer feel. Brief whimpers sounded into the still air, but he received no
answer. Alex had left him, and he didn't understand why. He wanted him here.
Wanted the security of his embrace, the steady, reassuring thud of his heart
beneath his cheek... he wanted this damned gag and blindfold gone so he could see.
Taste...
"You didn't wait."
Fox's head jerked in the direction of the gravel and honey voice and listened.
"I wanted you to wait."
I couldn't! Jesus, how could I with you...
Alex leaned down, brushing his lips over Fox's ear before whispering into it.
"Now we'll have to start over."
Start...
Oh... oh... God, he didn't mean...
Alex's tongue snaked out, tickling the sensitive inside of Fox's ear, and the
older man shivered.
Yeah, but he did.
"Are you tired, baby?" Alex asked, tapping into Fox's thoughts.
Slight nod of the golden brown head.
"Would you like to just go to sleep?"
He didn't know how to answer.
"It's okay," Alex murmured, stroking Fox's hair. "Give me a little while, and I
promise that you'll forget all about sleep."
And less than half an hour later, Fox was squirming and moaning, every bit as
desperate as he was earlier for release. He lay panting, chest heaving after
Alex had just released from his mouth the nipple he'd been tormenting, and he
felt the mattress rise. Short, breathy sobs sounded in his throat; the only
protest he could manage, but they died a quick death as he felt Alex return.
"I should leave you alone for a while as punishment for you coming before I
wanted you to," Alex told him softly, "but I've got something else in mind."
Fox whimpered wildly as he felt his lover's fingers slide around the middle of
his cock, holding it in place for the ring he secured at the base.
"There. Now I'll only have to punish you once."
Gently, Alex helped Fox to roll over then positioned him on his hands and knees.
"Don't move, now." Alex brushed a tender kiss over Fox's cheek then his temple.
"I love you, " he whispered, then backed away. The next thing Fox felt was the
slap of the flogger over his ass.
Not very hard, but certainly not the fairly gentle teasing of less than an hour
ago. His hips jerked on impact, and his cock, encircled snugly by the leather
ring, throbbed painfully. Jesus, this was going to be worse than the first
time... or better, depending on which way he looked at it...
Alex took a deep, steadying breath and swung again. His cock pushed against the
tight confines of his jeans as the leather slapped against Fox's flesh, pushing
a muffled cry past the gag. He struck again, with just a bit more strength and
watched a pink glow arise in the pale skin. Fox's sobs increased in volume as
each blow increased in strength, and Alex could hear the desperate need in each.
Dropping the flogger, he approached Fox and laid a hand gently one of the older
man's reddened cheeks. It was warm, almost hot to the touch, and he rubbed his
hand over the area, listening to Fox's breathless response. His hand slid up the
length other man's back, traveling up to his neck and head, his fingers gently
ruffling the slightly damp, golden-brown hair. "Down," he said softly, cupping
the back of Fox's neck and pushing.
Obediently, Fox lowered his shoulders to the bed, keeping his ass high in the
air. He trembled expectantly, waiting to feel the tip of Alex's slick, sheathed
cock pushing against his entrance. What did touch him was the flat of his
lover's hand, striking with no small amount of force at one cheek. He jerked
upward in surprise, his muffled shriek cutting the air, but Alex's hand speared
through his hair and pulled his head down again, holding it down on the pillow.
"I'm not done with you," Alex growled softly, picking up the mitt and passing it
over the mark his hand had left. "Can you take it?"
Whimpering piteously, Fox slowly nodded. Long seconds passed, and then he began
to shiver violently as Alex's lips, soft and gentle wandered over his wounded
flesh while the mitt stroked the other cheek.
"Do you know how much I want right now to be buried up to my aching balls in
this ass?" Alex asked, his words vibrating against the sensitized skin.
Fox pushed back with his hips, begging and sorely tempting Alex to do just that.
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Alex drew disjointed designs on his lover's
skin with the tip of his tongue. "Wouldn't you, Fox? You want me to fuck you so
long and so hard you won't be able to sit down for a week?"
Fox nodded frantically, praying that Alex's willpower would give out, and the
younger man would do what he was now suggesting.
"I will," Alex whispered just before the mitt disappeared, and he landed a
stinging blow to Fox's other cheek.
Fox cried out again but did not lift his head from the pillow. He endured an
immediate succession of four more strikes, his excitement grown now way beyond
anything he could have imagined. He waited trembling for Alex to continue,
desperate for release but utterly mesmerized by this dominant, unbearably erotic
side of his lover.
He'd never dreamed that he would be this submissive for anyone. Never had
been... not that he'd had many lovers to be submissive for, but that was beside
the point. He'd never found the idea of letting someone blindfold, gag, and
spank him a particularly stimulating one, but Jesus Christ, this was fantastic,
it was fucking explosive. It was...
It was Alex.
Only Alex could put him in such a vulnerable position as this, tormenting him,
bringing him exquisite pain and have him wanting to lie down at his feet and beg
for more.
Some time had passed; he wasn't sure how long, but it was enough to make him
shiver with anticipation. Finally, he felt the mattress sink a bit with the
added weight of his lover, kneeling behind him. He groaned softly as Alex's
hands skimmed the inflamed, rounded curves of his rear, and then lips, light as
dandelion fluff caressed the small of his back. Uncontrollable tremors wracked
his body as the mouth moved lower, wandering the territory his hands had just
occupied.
Alex nuzzled the cleft between his lover's ass cheeks, and his tongue snaked
out, teasing and probing deeper, drawing a tortured groan from Fox. The older
man held his breath, waiting... imagining the moist, thick presence breaching his
entrance... probing his interior... reducing him further to a mass of molten liquid.
But it never happened. Alex pulled away, nipping at the back of his upper thigh
then turned him onto his back and lay on top of him.
Fox blinked, attempting to focus as the blindfold was loosened and pulled away
from his face. He looked up into passion-darkened eyes, his hands clenching in
the sheets to keep them from reaching up to tug at the buttons on his lover's
shirt, and he moaned softly, willing Alex to understand.
"It's all right," Alex responded, stroking the hair away from Fox's face. "No
more spankings tonight."
Fox didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed, and the emotion must
have shown in his eyes because Alex leaned in, nuzzling his cheek and cooing
softly to him.
"You really liked feeling the sting of my hand on your ass?" He removed the gag,
and Fox's tongue automatically began to flick over his lips, trying to rid them
of their dryness.
"Tell me," Alex encouraged gently. "I want to hear you say it."
"Yes," Fox rasped. "I... I've never... " Again his tongue inched out, swiping at his
lips.
"You've never what?"
"Felt... like this. Like I wanted to... " Slowly, Fox's hands left the sheets and
crept over Alex's shoulders, stroking his upper back. "I'd give you anything,"
he added, sincerity laced arousal edging his tone.
Alex lowered his head until their lips were just barely touching. "You've
already given me everything," he whispered before taking Fox's mouth in a
sweet, heart-stopping kiss. Moments later he pulled away, unwinding Fox's arms
from around his neck and got to his knees. Slowly, he undid his shirt, his eyes
never leaving his lover's face. Hungry eyes watched his every move as button
after button gave, revealing the satiny skin beneath.
"Alex?"
Alex's hand slipped in past the open edge of his shirt, teasing one rigid
nipple.
"Yes, Fox?"
Fox watched that wandering hand, and he drew a corner of his lower lip into his
mouth chewing thoughtfully before he responded.
"Let me... I... " He reached out, letting the fingers of one hand trail down the
exposed flesh. "I'd like to undress you... please let me."
Sable lashes drifted downward then lifted part way.
"I'd love for you to undress me, baby."
Fox sat up cautiously, very much aware of the cock ring he still wore. He
emitted a heavy breath to try and cope with the increased pounding his movements
caused, and he turned his concentration to the treasure before him.
Alex drew a shuddering breath as Fox's mouth grazed his chest. The older man
finished undoing the buttons and pushed the shirt away from his shoulders and
down his arms, and Alex jerked the material away from his body, letting it drop
on the floor beside the bed. In the milliseconds it had taken him to do that,
Fox had stopped mouthing his chest, and now he speared a hand through the
golden-brown hair, pulling his lover's head back.
"Don't stop," he whispered, satisfied only when Fox was again kissing and
licking the hot skin. As he moaned and shuddered under his lover's hot caresses,
he felt hands tugging insistently at the fastenings on his jeans. Once undone,
he let Fox pull the garment away, also dispensing with his underwear and socks.
That accomplished, he kneeled naked before his admiring lover, stroking the
other man's cheek.
"Make me feel good, Fox."
Looking up into passion-clouded eyes, Fox leaned forward, nuzzling Alex's chest
and throat before moving to cover one erect nipple with his mouth. His eyes
closed, and he listened to Alex's sharp intake of breath as his tongue flicked
over the tip, and then he began to suck gently while his fingers brushed over
the other constricted peak. Alex's fingers slid through his hair, anchoring in
the thick strands, keeping his head in place, and he heard the younger man emit
a low moan as he closed his teeth around the stiff peak and pulled.
"Shhhhit. Oh, Christ," Alex rumbled, his fingers tightening their hold on Fox's
hair. "All I can think about right now is pounding the hell out of your ass."
Fox released the nipple and rubbed his cheek against his lover's chest,
shuddering at the raw statement... and wishing that Alex would stop talking about
it already and just do it. His body demanded that he ask; beg if he had to.
But his heart stubbornly refused, aching to give everything he had and more to
the one man in the world it beat for.
Alex hugged Fox to him, loosening his firm grip on the older man's hair and
petting the silken strands. His eyes fluttered closed as Fox's hands began to
move, caressing his back, and the older man's mouth once again touched his
chest.
"Incredible," he whispered as Fox's tongue grazed his warm skin. "Jesus, what
you do to me... " Slowly, he sank down, coming to rest against the pillows, Fox
draped over him. Moaning softly, he let his lover take care of him, and Fox did
so blissfully. Alex's taste and texture sizzled on his tongue as he worshipped
his love. Deep groans of pleasure resonated in his heart and filled him with a
soul-deep desire to please... to again and again show this man, who for so long had
not known tenderness or contentment or the sweetness of selfless love, that he
was and would always be desperately wanted and needed.
Alex felt control steadily slipping away with each stroke of Fox's hands, with
each lash of his tongue, and he couldn't find the strength or the will to take
it back. As large in charge as he'd been just minutes ago, Fox's touch could
reduce him to a weak-kneed bundle of raw nerves just that quickly.
The Alex of old would have despised such effortless surrender; would never have
dreamed of putting himself in that position. Power was everything. Not easily
acquired and once had, relinquished only through death or at the very least a
hell of a good fight. Now he handed it over as willingly as he had given Fox his
heart so many months ago. And as right as it had been to offer Fox his eternal
love, so this was right. No doubt. No suspicion. No monetary compensation.
Fox touched Alex everywhere, in every way he could, hungrily, yet with tender
reverence; afraid he wouldn't get enough before Alex once again took control.
But minute after minute passed, and Alex's breaths grew more erratic, his gaze
more cloudy and distant, and Fox's shackled cock ached at the thought that he
was now free to do as he wished.
And he wished to...
Both hands reached for the cock ring. Fingers tightened on the fastening,
preparing to remove the accursed thing.
Oh, God, he wanted so much to...
Glazed, gold-flecked eyes came to rest on the man moaning and writhing as Fox
had been not so very long ago this evening, and he wondered if he had
unconsciously done something to turn the situation into what it now was. He
hadn't meant to. He'd wanted...
He left the cock ring in place and slipped to the mattress beside Alex,
snuggling against the younger man and nuzzling his arm
Jesus, he really did.
"Fox," Alex groaned, reaching out in an attempt to pull the other man back.
"Please," Fox whispered breathily in response. "I need you to... I'm yours, Alex.
Please?"
Alex dragged himself out of the sensual fog he'd been immersed in, and he looked
down at the man curled into his side.
Shoulders hunched, head bowed so low as to totally obscure his face from view.
Alex took a steadying breath, trying to momentarily put aside the screaming in
his lower regions, and he slipped a hand under Fox's chin and lifted his head. A
pleading green and gold gaze met his eyes.
Fox offered no more entreaties; in fact he said nothing at all. Alex could read
every intended word in his exquisitely tormented eyes.
Half a breath was all Fox was able to manage before he found himself on his back
and Alex sprawled over him. Hands everywhere at once, mouth devouring him, and
he simply melted into it, readily submitting to Alex's renewed dominance.
Panting heavily between ravenous kisses, he clung to his lover, swept away in a
blinding tidal wave of passion that never let up. Alex increased the tension,
taking Fox to the outer realms of desperation and beyond, and just as the older
man had begun his descent into utter madness, Alex pulled away. Shushing his
lover's pained cries for fulfillment, he quickly retrieved a condom and tube of
lubrication. Gritting his teeth, he slid the latex over his cock and, as quickly
as he could, applied the lube.
Fox clutched at the sheets, and he choked down many an excited whimper as Alex's
hands went to the cock ring and carefully removed it. He gasped loudly,
struggling to hold himself together until Alex allowed him his release.
"C'mere, beautiful," Alex rumbled, pulling Fox under him. "You've been very
good," he whispered, nipping at the other man's lower lip. "Thank you. I know
how hard it's been. Would you like to put an end to this now?"
"Yes," Fox breathed then stopped abruptly, looking up into his lover's dark eyes
through a sweep of golden-brown lashes. "If you want to."
Alex gave Fox a sweet smile, stroking the backs of his thighs.
"I've wanted to finish this ever since we started it." He lifted Fox's legs and
moaned softly as the other man wrapped them around his waist. Guiding his
sheathed cock between Fox's quivering cheeks, he found his way home. Tense heat
enveloped him, and he paused, shuddering uncontrollably.
Fox sobbed loudly, wrapping his arms around Alex's shoulders. His fingers dug
into the muscle, and he buried his face in the side of the younger man's neck,
fighting the urge to buck against him. Alex would move when he was ready, and
Fox would wait until then... if he didn't die first.
Trying to get a handle on his respiration, Alex remained frozen, his cock only
halfway inside his lover. He could feel Fox's strained attempt at keeping his
muscles loose, and he nuzzled the other man's hair in a thankful gesture. A few
more torturous moments, and he began to move again, inching forward until he was
fully entrenched in silken warmth.
Nearly delirious in his need for release, Fox gasped Alex's name, raking his
fingers over the younger man's back and leaving long red welts in their wake.
The small pain took Alex's arousal to a level beyond that which he could
tolerate, and a low, feral growl rolled in his throat as he held Fox's hips in a
bruising grip and began to slam into him.
The breath left Fox in a rush, and his head snapped back as the shock of his
lover's sudden and violent possession hit him. Clipped, incoherent sounds pushed
past his constricted throat, and he clung tightly to Alex, unable to let go. The
friction of their sweat-slick bodies stimulated his long-neglected cock and took
him quickly toward his long-awaited release.
Alex met him there, continuing to pound mercilessly into him even as they both
detonated and wild screams pierced the air. He continued endlessly it seemed
until utter exhaustion forced him to stop. Gasping for air, he collapsed,
slipping out of Fox and lying limply on his lover's heaving chest. With the
exception of their labored breaths, the room was now silent.
Alex lay motionless for a long while, feeling Fox's slowing heartbeat against
his own. Finally, reluctantly, he rolled off of his lover, wincing as he lifted
a weakened hand to his depleted cock and removed the used condom. He dropped his
hand to the mattress, too drained yet to get up and throw the rubber away. His
eyes drifted shut, and he lost consciousness for a while until he felt a gentle
warmth stroking his belly. He struggled to open his eyes and found Fox kneeling
beside him. His heavy gaze followed his lover's movements as his hand traveled
lower, now washing his softened cock.
Fox looked up, hearing the almost inaudible moan and met two slits of glittering
green. He lowered his lashes and finished his task then took the condom from
Alex's hand and disposed of both, returning to the bed and pulling the sheet up
over them as he pressed his body against the younger man. His head dropped to
Alex's chest, nuzzling the smooth, warm skin as his lover wrapped him in a
tender embrace.
"So you're still talking to me?" Alex asked, barely above a whisper.
Fox lifted his head and fixed an honestly perplexed stare on the other.
"After what I did to you," Alex explained in answer to the silent question.
Still in submissive mode, Fox again lowered his lashes and spoke ever so softly.
"I loved what you did to me."
Alex reached out and stroked the top of Fox's head, and he gave his lover a tiny
grin.
"Enough to let me do it again sometime?"
Fox sank down into Alex arms and closed his eyes.
"Any time."
Alex tightened his hold on the older man and pressed a soft kiss into his hair.
"God, I feel so good. So... whole." He kissed Fox again. "I don't think I've felt
this complete since... " He stopped and thought a moment. "I don't think I've
ever felt this complete."
Fox smiled, kissing Alex's chest; happier than he could be that his lover had at
last seemed to have found total freedom from the misery that had stalked him for
so long.
"You got me here, Fox," Alex rasped. "If it weren't for you I'd be in some
sleazy motel room right now, letting some slimy bastard... " He cut himself off and
turned his eyes to his lover's face.
Fox hesitated a moment then slowly drew himself up and nuzzled the underside of
Alex's chin. He kissed the stubbled surface and cautiously worked his way up to
the flawlessly bowed lips, bestowing two teasing kisses on them before turning
his gaze to Alex's.
Alex looked up into his lover's exquisite, now gray-green eyes, studying them
for brief seconds before rolling Fox beneath him, again giving them what they
both needed before falling into exhausted, blissful slumber.
Fox sat up, stretching his upper body and groaning softly.
Damn, he was sore.
He made himself get out of bed and bit back another moan.
Goddamn, he was sore.
Stretching again, he half smiled, half grimaced down at the unconscious demon,
who had spent the entire weekend taking him apart piece by piece.
What a fucking workout. And by the time he'd finished screaming and passed out
last night, he'd come at least... shit, he couldn't remember how many times he'd
come.
Christ, the man was an insatiable beast.
The smile softened, and Fox grew thoughtful as he continued to study his lover's
face.
Alex was all those things he'd just thought, and yet here, now, as he slept,
there was a profoundly childlike innocence to him. It never ceased to amaze Fox,
who had lain marveling at this very thing countless times before. To look at
Alex now, like this, one might never guess that he'd lived the life he had. He
seen too much, experienced far more than a man of his years should have... than
anyone of any age should, and Fox would have thought that there wouldn't be a
scrap of innocence left anywhere to be found, but it was here.
He brushed his fingertips over the glistening sable strands of Alex's hair.
In this beautiful, sleeping face...
Fox pulled his hand away and reluctantly retreated to the bathroom, leaving Alex
still peacefully sleeping.
He went about his morning routine, running on autopilot as his thoughts focused
on the day ahead. Most especially this afternoon, when he and Alex would make
the first of what would probably rank up there as the two most important phone
calls of their lives.
Gonna be a bitch of a long morning.
He should stay home today, he thought abruptly. Should never have told Skinner
he'd come in. He was sure Walt would have understood.
Maybe he should call. Catch the A.D. before he left the building. Yeah. As soon
as he finished shaving, he'd...
The bathroom door opened, and Alex trudged in, still partially asleep. Passing
within inches of Fox, he stopped in front of the toilet, relieving himself then
turned toward the sink, nudging the older man aside to wash his hands. That
done, he draped his arms around Fox's towel-wrapped waist and rested his cheek
on his lover's bare shoulder.
"How come you didn't wake me?"
"You wore yourself out, wearing me out," Fox teased softly, anointing the tip
of Alex's nose with a dot of leftover shaving cream. "You needed the rest. In
fact you still look pretty out of it. Why don't you go back to bed?"
Alex rubbed at his nose then shook his head and said nothing.
"I decided I'm going to call Skinner," Fox announced. "Tell him I'm not coming
in."
"No."
"Yeah. Alex, I should never have told him I'd come to work today. I don't know
what the hell I was thinking. I'm not going to be able to get much done, and I
don't want to leave you alone... "
"Why not?"
"Too much time to pace. There's nothing worse than anticipation." Fox kissed the
side of the younger man's head. "And even though we know the tests are going to
come out fine, you can't tell me that you're not anxious about it."
Alex shrugged. "Yeah. Sure... a little."
"Me too." Fox turned and wrapped his arms around his lover. "So let's be anxious
together." He displayed a devilish grin. "Maybe we can even find some way to
distract each other."
Alex laughed softly.
"After spending practically the entire weekend in bed, you can even think
about going at it again?"
"What're you complaining about?" Fox chuckled, giving the other man a playful
swat on the rear. "I'm the one who got worked over."
"I couldn't have done a very good job," Alex tossed back, "if you're ready to go
this soon afterward."
"You did a hell of a good job," Fox answered, his voice lowering to a gravelly
moan. "So good I'm thinking about an encore."
"Fox," Alex gasped as the older man stroked a hand over his chest and lower
abdomen. "You should go to work."
"Don't want to go," Fox whispered, his hand moving lower. "Want to stay here
with you." His fingers brushed the tip of Alex's awakening cock. "Want to go
back to bed. Get on my hands and knees... " He squeezed the rapidly hardening
organ. "... and take this up my ass... " He released a heavy, stuttering breath into
Alex's ear. "... hard."
"Fuck," Alex breathed, ripping the towel from Fox's waist and grasping a handful
of hair. He pulled Fox into a searing kiss then released his mouth abruptly,
pushing the older man into the bedroom.
"Call Skinner."
Fox fell onto the bed and picked up the phone, punching in Skinner's number with
trembling fingers. The phone rang three times, and he was beginning to think
that Skinner might have left early when the A.D. finally picked up.
"Yeah?"
"Walt. It's me."
"Mulder. What's up? I was just getting ready to leave."
"Yeah, I uh... I figured. I wanted to catch you before you did."
"Okay. What's up? You need a ride or something?"
"No. No, actually, I... I'm going to stay home today."
"Oh. Are you all right?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine."
"Krycek?"
"He's okay too. But uh... I think I'd just like to stay here and wait for those
results... you know... "
"Oh. Yeah. I understand... you probably wouldn't be able to get much work done
today, anyway."
"Yeah, I doubt it."
"All right then. Good luck, Mulder... to both of you."
Mulder smiled at the sincere gesture.
"Thanks. I'll talk to you later."
Disconnecting, Fox dropped the phone down on the nightstand, completely missing
the cradle, his attention turned back to Alex, who was eyeing him much like a
starving man would a five course meal. The expression on the younger man's face
gave rise to a soft laugh.
"What's so funny?" Alex growled, reaching for the older man and jerking him down
to the mattress.
Still smiling, Fox responded.
"I was watching you sleep earlier, and I was thinking to myself how sweet and
innocent you looked. You look like the farthest thing from innocent right now."
Fox groaned at the low, nasty chuckle he received in answer. Before he could say
another word, Alex pounced.
The rest of the morning went by in a loud, sweaty blur, and when the room
finally went silent for the last time, it was nearly noon. The two men dragged
themselves out of bed, showered, dressed and retreated to the kitchen for a bite
to eat.
"So," Alex began, opening the refrigerator door and peering inside. "We didn't
have breakfast, but it's lunch time. What d'you think?"
"I think my ass hurts," Fox grunted as he lowered himself carefully into a
chair.
"Awww." Grinning, Alex looked up over the door at Fox. "Want me to get you a
pillow?"
"Thanks for your sympathy."
Alex shut the door and crossed over to his seated lover.
"Please, Alex," he whined, mimicking Fox's voice. "Hard. I want it hard... " He
laughed at the answering scowl. "Next time I won't listen to you."
The scowl turned to an all out pout.
"You won't?"
"Nope. Not if you're going to complain about it later."
"Who said I was complaining? I was simply stating a fact."
"And looking for sympathy."
"Can I help it if I love having your attention?"
"You always have my undivided attention," Alex promised, kissing Fox softly
before pulling back and slapping his lover's knee. "Now, tell me what you want.
I'm starving."
Finally agreeing on what to have, Fox helped Alex prepare their brunch, then the
two ate, each silently amazed at the other's hearty appetite.
Once the kitchen had been put back into order, Fox looked down at his watch.
"One-forty. Simmons said mid-afternoon. You want to give it until about three
then call?"
"Yeah, I guess." Alex took Fox's hand and led him out into the living room.
"Though I'm tempted to try right now."
"We can if you really want to."
"No," Alex said with a heavy sigh. "He did say mid-afternoon. Let's not bug
the guy."
Fox nodded in agreement and joined Alex on the sofa, following his lover's gaze
to the aquarium. They watched in silence for a while as the two angelfish glided
back and forth together.
"He really does like that other fish. He never got that close to any of the
others... unless he was getting ready to eat one of them."
"Just takes the love of one good fish," Alex cracked then rested his head on
Fox's shoulder. "Like us."
Fox shook with silent laughter. "You're comparing us to a couple of fish?"
Alex shrugged and wrapped his arms around the other man. Fox brought a hand up
to his cheek, stroking the smooth skin and kissed the top of his head as he
continued to watch the graceful pair in the tank.
An hour filled with nothing followed, neither man willing to break the
meaningful silence. Minutes later, Fox glanced down at his watch and took a
fortifying breath.
"I guess we should call now," he said softly, his voice jarring Alex out of
himself. The younger man lifted his head from Fox's shoulder and gave him a tiny
smile.
"Guess so."
He lifted himself from the sofa, followed by Fox, and he picked up the card that
Agent Simmons had given them. Handing the phone to Fox, he read the number then
waited.
"... Agent Simmons please." Fox reached out and took Alex's hand, squeezing it
reassuringly as he waited for the tech to take the phone. "... Simmons. It's
Mulder. Yeah. You got those test results for me? Yeah, he's right here... yeah. I
understand... okay."
Alex gave Fox an impatient, curious look.
"He just wanted me to understand that he could only give each test result to the
person it was intended for. Protocol and all that," Fox whispered as he waited
for Simmons to get their folders.
Alex nodded his understanding and emitted a heavy sigh.
Fox gave the anxious man's hand another squeeze and returned his attention to
the phone.
"Yeah, I'm here."
He was silent for a few seconds, then a smile spread across his face.
"Thanks, Simmons. Here, I'll give Alex the phone."
Grinning broadly, Alex leaned in for a quick, celebratory kiss then hoisted the
phone to his ear.
"Simmons. Yeah... "
Several seconds passed... several more than it had taken for Fox to get his own
results, and he stopped breathing as the grin faded slowly from Alex's face.
"Yeah," Alex croaked just above a whisper, "I... I understand... right... I'll... I'll tell
him. Thank... thanks."
Fox stood frozen as Alex gently placed the phone down and turned slightly away
from him. His mouth began to move, his jaw feeling rusty and heavy, and then a
sound came out. A soft click emanating from his suddenly desiccated throat. That
was all.
"Simmons said to tell you that it's important that you go back in three months
and get tested again," Alex said softly, flatly. "And... every three months after
that for as long as we're... "
He couldn't speak any more. He couldn't think. All he could do right now was the
one thing he didn't want to do. He closed his eyes, unable to stop the horrific
pain of the moment from taking him over. The next thing he knew, he was being
held in the trembling warmth of Fox's arms.
Fox. Oh, God. Oh, God, Fox. Please... this is my punishment. Mine. Keep him out
of it. Please, oh, God, please keep him out of it.
"Alex," Fox gasped, choking on the single word. "I... I don't... " The shaking
increased, and he buried his face in his stricken lover's hair.
This wasn't happening. It wasn't. It couldn't be... IT WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO
HAPPEN THIS WAY.
Oh, Jesus.
Fox took several shuddering breaths, trying to pull himself together. He could
fall apart later. Right now he needed to concentrate solely on Alex. He had to...
Choking back a hysterical sob, he tightened his hold on the man standing quietly
in his arms.
"It's going to be all right," he promised, asking himself if he was out of his
mind for even saying the words. "It's not," he rambled, "not like it was fifteen
years ago. Medicine has come a long way in helping people live with... " He choked
again. "It's going to be all right, baby. We'll find out who the best doctor is
in this area, and we'll see him. Find out what we need to do and... "
We. We, we, we, we...
It was all Alex heard. All that filtered in through the fog that was surrounding
him.
Fox had every intention of going through this with him. Of course he did. And he
would.
That should have been a comforting thing. Something for Alex to cling to in the
sea of blackness he was now drowning in. But all he could feel was sick. He'd
just condemned the only man he'd ever love to a life of doctor's visits and
medications and worry and test after test after fucking test and... and...
He broke from Fox's embrace and staggered through the spinning room, blindly
finding the bathroom. Fox was right behind, catching him, softening his fall as
he began to retch into the toilet, bringing up everything he'd eaten. When it
was over, he went limp, slumping over onto his side on the floor, and Fox was
still there behind him, pulling him into his arms.
"I love you," Fox whispered, the words breaking apart in his throat. "We're
going to do this together, Alex. You and me."
Those last words hung in the air as Fox lay there, his shattered lover wrapped
in his arms. The awful reality of what their life would now be sinking deeper
into his consciousness.
He began to cry.
End?
Hey, wouldn't it be a hoot if I said yes?
January, 2002
|
D.C Rain IIDouble or Nothing
by Aries November, 2000 Fandom: XF Pairing: M/K Rated NC-17 for language and m/m sexual situations Spoilers: teeny tiny ones from Tunguska and Anasazi Summary: The search for Alex is on, and Fox won't stop until he finds him. Turns out that'll be the easiest part. Feedback: You betcha! As always, I can be reached at MMCUSN@aol.com Archive: RatB, Den of Sin, Slashville I'd appreciate a quick shout from anyone else who wants it, okay? https://www.squidge.org/terma/aries/aries.htm http://denofsin.slashcity.net/aries/ariestitle.html |
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