Author's Notes: I have to thank Slida for goading me into writing fan fiction. She and I were discussing under what cicumstances would Sam and Daniel have a relationnship. That resulted in PERCHANCE TO DREAM, which had a bittersweet ending. I then felt it necessary to show that Sam's life was actually better as a result of her experiences in PERCHANCE TO DREAM. I hope this story gets that message across. In fact, I think that there are several positive messages about life, love and family in this short story and I hope they y'all enjoyed it.
DISCLAIMER: All characters and property of Stargate SG-1 belong to MGM/UA, World Gekko Corp. and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.
Samantha Carter knew that General Hammond was right. He was telling her that she was working too hard and needed to rest. Sam nearly gave her commanding officer a lame excuse about why she had to stay and finish a test, but the general gave her "that look".
"Captain Carter, do I have to make this an order?"
"No, sir. I'll be out of here in 5 minutes," she respectfully replied.
General Hammond did not baby officers under his command. More importantly, he expected his orders to be obeyed.
"Captain, I don't want you back in this facility until Monday morning. I will check the security logs to make sure don't through the weekend again."
Sam saved her files and shut down her computer. She gathered her jacket and headed to her car. During the drive back to her home, she reviewed everything that had happened, since she and Daniel had been rescued from PX_____. She had not seen Daniel, since their restrained goodbye outside her office. However, she knew from the amount of information coming back to them from Area 51, that Sha'uri/Ammonet was providing vital information, that would make a victory over Goa'uld forces possible. Her job since her return, was to sort out and verify all technological and scientific intelligence from Ammonet. Sam, of course, shared everything with the Tok'ra strategist, assigned to her. In the meantime, various SGC teams and Tok'ra operatives actually performed the missions, that verified the military "intell", stole technology and sabotaged Goa'uld strongholds.
When Sam first contacted the Tok'ra, she never dreamed that the alliance would produce such spectacular results. Jacob Carter's leadership of the Tok'ra military was nothing short of brilliant. He was the bridge that united the Tok'ra and S.G.C. Every week, the joint teams captured more ships and brought over more Jaafa warriors to Teal'c command. Her father was truly in his element. He had hated his desk job at the Pentagon, but had served it dutifully. His position with the Tok'ra put him back in the field and used his strategic cunning as well. Despite her fierce protests, Sam was considered too valuable, as an analyst, to go on these hazardous missions. Even Sam had to admit, her best contribution to the cause was to reverse engineer the technology, brought back from these raids. The Air Force had already handed over her schematics for a shield device to a defense contractor. Her department would produce an arsenal of new weapons and defenses in the coming months. The S.G.C. will never have to defend its cost to any Senate budget committee ever again, thanks to the technological spin-offs. More importantly, her new devices would save human lives in the future.
Sam thought about her SG-1 comrades. True to their word, since her return, Teal'c and Jack had shown their support of Sam Carter, each in his own way. Whenever Teal'c was on Earth, he insisted on waking Sam early and putting her through a rigorous workout. As a Jaafa, it was his way of showing that he cared. As for O'Neill, he invited her over for steak and beer often. For some reason, Jack ascribed great therapeutic value to these two food groups. Sam smiled, as she thought, "It's a good thing that Teal'c puts me through my paces. At least, it burns off all the calories that Jack feeds me."
She pulled into the driveway leading up to the charming mountain cabin. This, too, was another change in her life since her return from the Po'rue home world. S.G.C. officers, for security purposes, had packed up her apartment, after she had been missing for one month. They stored her belongings in a secure room at S.G.C. Upon her return, she lived on base, until Janet Frasier insisted that she move in and share this quaint cabin. Janet Frasier turned out to be an excellent roommate and seeing Cassandra often was a great bonus. Sam had to admit that she no longer wanted to live alone, after her time with Daniel. She had changed during her five-month honeymoon. With Daniel, she had enjoyed sharing her meals, her home and her life. Initially, she had missed the warmth and camaraderie of the Po'rue village, but Janet was always willing to share a cup of tea and conversation. Mostly, Sam buried herself in her work. One evening, after they had become comfortable with each other, the good doctor hinted, "I am a good listener. If you ever need to talk about 'him', I will be here for you."
Sam rolled her eyes and exclaimed, "Is there anyone at S.G.C., who has *not* figured out that Daniel and I became lovers?" Sam and Janet had a good laugh at her exasperation. It let her friend know that she was at peace with the abrupt end of the relationship. Teal'c and Jack, being men, had never mentioned it, after that group hug in Sam's office two months ago.
As Sam got out of her car, Cassandra's cute mongrel, came bounding up to her. She remembered when "Uncle" Jack gave Cassandra the dog. She stooped down to greet the beloved pet, and expected its twelve-year-old girl companion to be right behind. That was yet another fringe benefit of moving in with Janet and Cassandra. Sam couldn't have a pet unless she lived with someone else; she never knew when her work would take her away for days at a time; or in the case of her recent adventure, months at a time. Winnie often slept in bed with Sam. She was not ashamed to admit to herself that she needed to cuddle up to something at night. After sleeping like spoons with Daniel for five months, she almost could not bear to sleep alone. Winnie sensed that Sam had needed her on those nights and was only too happy to oblige. For her part, Auntie Samantha indulged this dog with all of the shameless affection that a woman normally reserved for her child.
"Give your Auntie kisses!" she cooed in a syrupy sweet voice. Sam heard a deep masculine chuckle nearby.
Startled, she looked up and saw Martouf standing on her front porch. He was smiling with unabashed approval at the beautiful blonde woman. A montage of happy images flashed before Sam's eyes. She could feel all the joy that Jolinar experienced every time she was reunited with Martouf after a mission. For a few moments, she could actually feel the security and warmth that the two Tok'ra lovers had known during their time together. Embarrassed, Sam realized that she had been staring at Martouf like a dumbstruck schoolgirl.
"Samantha, I hope that I am not intruding. You looked so happy with that domesticated animal; I did not want to ruin the moment by speaking."
"Martouf, I am happy to see you. You look great." Sam thought that he looked stunning in "civilian" clothes. He was wearing a cream colored v-neck cashmere sweater with matching wool blend slacks. She felt the urge to touch the soft fabrics covering his toned and tanned body, but tried to focus on what he was saying to her.
"Colonel O'Neill dropped me off here. He also chose these clothes for me. Do you like them?", he hesitated, "Jack said that he was tired of seeing me in fatigues or my uniform. He said I needed a civilian wardrobe, if I was going to spend so much time here.", he made a hand gesture to indicate Earth in general. Sam appreciated his caution. Martouf was being careful not to say any words that would indicate his involvement with the Stargate program. Ever since that reporter had taped her conversation with Col. O'Neill in Washington, D.C., Samantha acted like a parabolic microphone was hidden behind every tree.
"Oh yeah, I like them a lot. But I never guessed that Colonel O'Neill had G.Q. tastes."
Martouf's face looked puzzled, "I am not familiar with that phrase, Samantha."
"Never mind. Come in and I'll introduce you to Janet and Cassandra Frasier. You'll like them. We're just one big happy family around here."
"Oh, actually, I met them both. They left shortly after I arrived. In fact, I helped them load up the car for a short trip."
The conspiracy finally dawned on Sam. She put all of the pieces together. Colonel O'Neill drops Martouf at her doorstep. General Hammond orders her to go home and rest. Janet and Cassandra suddenly leave for the weekend. Somehow, Teal'c is in on this too, but I just haven't figured his part yet, she thought. Actually, being set up for a date with Martouf wasn't a bad thing, Sam considered, I just may thank my interfering buddies.
"Well, Martouf, I was going to fix myself some dinner. Would you care to join me? I would appreciate the company." She piped in as she met him halfway on her porch steps.
Martouf placed a chaste light kiss on her cheek and sighed gently but sadly, "I came here to discuss something privately with you. I did not want to discuss it at Cheyenne Mountain out of respect for you."
"Ok. Come inside." Sam opened the door and they walked back to her kitchen. "I'll get you a drink. That's customary around here. You always get someone a drink before" She lost her train of thought, when she noticed the note on the refrigerator. "I'm sorry, Martouf, I just want to read this note left for me."
"Dear Sam,
Please eat the salad and lasagna I have already
prepared. It will only go bad, before I get back and you
love my Italian cooking so much! I know that you would do
the same for me, girlfriend. The wine is already open
and breathing. Drink all that you want. Martouf can
sleep here tonight if you guys imbibe too much to drive him back
to the base. See you Sunday night.
XOX,
Cupid's little helper"
That portion of the note was in Janet's handwriting. The bottom lines were in Cassandra's cursive.
"Dear Auntie Sam, Uncle Teal'c is taking me and Mother camping this weekend. I should qualify for three Girl Scout Badges with all of the neat stuff he wants to teach me. This is so cool! I have been begging to go camping for months. That nice man, Martin, seems to like you so much. He is so handsome. We'll talk about boys when I get back. Love, Cass"
Sam smiled and blushed at Cassandra's enthusiasm. "Well, now I know Teal'c's part in all of this." Her friends did this with love and it warmed Sam's heart.
Holding up the note, Sam turned to her guest, "Oh, should I start calling you Martin, when you're here. Was that Jack's idea? Martin is a common name and if it keeps people from asking any questions, then it's good for security."
"Samantha, you may call me anything you like and I will respond." he smiled. He could not hide his feelings for her, even when he tried.
With two wineglasses in front of them, Sam and Martouf settled on the couch in her living room. Martouf held Sam's hand and took a deep breath. "Sam, you are cleared to hear everything I am about to say. In fact, you will be hearing it with General Hammond on Monday at your regular meeting. However, I felt that for personal reasons, I wanted to tell you privately so that you can prepare yourself."
Sam nodded and squeezed his hand a little so that he would continue.
"As you know, I have been going back and forth to Area 51, to assist in debriefing Ammonet. Lantesh and I speak Abydonian, just like Daniel Jackson does, but we have more knowledge of Goa'uld tactics and customs. Colonel Maybourne, Daniel and I are convinced that we have extracted all of the valuable information that Ammonet possessed. Tok'ra physicians are going to arrive shortly to separate Ammonet from Sha'uri. There is no risk to the host, in the way that we perform the procedure. We, the Tok'ra, want to execute Ammonet for her crimes. We feel that we have jurisdiction and have collected irrefutable evidence. Colonel Maybourne," Martouf said the name with a hint of scorn, "wants to keep Ammonet alive for research purposes. Either way, Daniel and Sha'uri will be re-united as husband and wife, in every sense of the word, within the week. I have been spending a lot of time with Daniel at Area 51, he wants to find Sha'uri's child on Abydos and live out their lives in peace there. As an anthropologist, he hates to leave the STARGATE program, but as a husband, he must do what is best for Sha'uri. After we return Daniel and his wife to Abydos, it is very likely that you will never see him again."
Martouf paused and looked at Sam for her reaction. Sam looked momentarily stunned as the words sunk in. She thought for a moment, then asked, "Martouf, why are you telling me this *privately*?"
"When you were missing, Sam, all I could think about was how to find you, so I could see you again. Jack and Teal'c felt the same way, but for different reasons. I only realized, after I returned you to S.G.C., that you were better off where you were." Shaking his head in remorse, he continued, "If only we had left you there," he looked her in the eye, "you and Daniel would have been very happy for the rest of your lives. By now, you might even have made a child together."
There it was. The truth was finally out between them. Sam felt relieved, "Wow, how long have you known? I am glad that I did not choose acting for a profession, I apparently can't fool anyone."
"I could just tell by the way Daniel avoids mentioning you. When Teal'c and Jack visited him in the desert, your absence spoke volumes to me."
Sam remembered the trip. Upon their return, Jack and Teal'c told her about how strong Daniel was being for Sha'uri. Sam did not visit her former team member for fear of seeing Daniel and Sha'uri together. But afterwards, she realized that she missed the Daniel, who had been her good friend for three years.
"Martouf, I really do want him and Sha'uri to be happy. I was his friend first and I always will be. Yeah, I loved Daniel and I would have spent the rest of my life with him gladly, if we had not been rescued. But we *did* get back home and I am just fine with that. I have lost nothing by being his lover and wife for that time. Quite the opposite, it has made me a better woman." Sam struggled to find the right words, "Once you have opened yourself up to loving someone completely ..and giving yourself completely, you come through it on the other side, with gifts that you never dreamed of. You must understand me, because you and Jolinar were together for so long. I no longer resist Jolinar's memories. I no longer fear her feelings, her thoughts, her experiences. Now, I can share my life with someone and know that it does not diminish my individuality whatsoever."
Martouf pulled her into a tight hug and kissed the top of her head. He remained holding her for a long time with his head resting on the top of hers. Sam felt deep warmth and contentment. Deep in her soul, this man and this moment just felt right.
Before Daniel, Captain Samantha Carter had a dozen handy excuses, why she had no time or desire for a relationship. Now, she could not picture her life without a beloved companion. All the reasons, which she had used before, melted away in Martouf's presence. He understood her work. He had been fighting the Goa'uld, before she had even been born. He had loved a warrior before. He had fought side by side with his lover. And he had lost her. Now, he was ready to love again.
"Martouf, you have been carrying this guilt too long. Please forget about it. I would have done the same for Jack or Teal'c, I would have searched until I found them. Now, let's have a great dinner. My roommate made us a pan of her special lasagna recipe. You are in for a treat!" She switched to a lighthearted tone, "Hey, but don't ever expect my cooking to be as good as hers. If you want good cooking, you're going to have to date Janet instead of me."
Sam got up and headed for the kitchen, still holding his hand.
"Tough choice. She's a good cook; you're a brave soldier. I just don't know." Martouf had spent enough time with SG-1 to pick up on their good-natured teasing. He was going to fit right in with the rest of her makeshift Air Force family. That meant a lot to Sam.
"Actually, she left me a note. She would be so disappointed if we didn't have some sort of torrid sexual fling this weekend. Look at all the trouble that she went to; dinner, wine, flowers, leaving the house," Sam counted off.
Martouf knew her jest was really an invitation, "Well, let's not disappoint her." He guided her back into an embrace. Sam tilted her head up. She could feel his solid body pressed up against her hers. Martouf started the gentle joining of their lips, but Sam took over. She pressed herself closer and tighter; she deepened the kiss by making the first foray into his mouth with her tongue. There was no joking now. They felt like they had been apart for too long. The clothing between them was now a nuisance to be removed. Somehow between breathless kisses, panting mouths and passionate touching, they managed to get to Sam's bedroom.
Once inside, Sam furiously pulled off all of Martouf's clothes and tossed them aside carelessly. Once she got a good look at his lean taught body, she was actually spellbound by its beauty. "You are so beautiful. My God, I could look at you all night."
"Oh, Samantha, I hope you want to do a lot more than just look. Let me help you out of those fatigues."
A sudden alarming thought occurred to Sam. "Martouf, I have to ask! Is Lantesh ok with us doing this? Is he still mourning Jolinar?"
Lantesh has been nagging me for the last two months to declare my feelings for you, even though we both thought that you still loved Daniel Jackson. I risked your rejection tonight, just to shut him up. Right now, Lantesh is the happiest symbiote in the Tok'ra. Do you need to talk to him to be certain?"
"No, I'll take your word for it!"
Samantha and Martouf never had dinner that night. At one point, Sam brought the wineglasses and bottle into the bedroom, while her lover rested. During the night, some of their sexual play felt new and exciting, as it normally does between new lovers. But, also, some of their embraces felt very familiar like old lovers, who had missed each other terribly after a long absence. Either way, they welcomed all the emotions that flowed between them.
Before falling asleep, Samantha Carter thought about her future with Martouf. Maybe, someday, when the Goa'uld were defeated, they would live amongst the Tok'ra. She would enjoy having her dad around. Then again, maybe, they would stay right here in Colorado. She could picture Jack teaching his honorary nieces and nephews the finer points of hockey. A very serene thought lulled Sam to sleep that night. She realized that she would find love anywhere she landed in the universe.