Somehow, in the evolution of slash, it has become a common belief that the more desperate you sound for feedback, the more you'll get. Pleas like "pleeeez send feedback, it's the only reason I write" are getting so common that one day I expect to read "Send feedback or I'll slit my wrists and die on the bathroom floor in a pool of my own blood. You have two hours."

I have no specific examples, which is only because I'm lazy because God knows about one in 10 stories have a desperate-sounding plea for feedback. Some of them are original, like a guy I saw on a recent NSync list who said "Send feedback or I'll turn to booze." Others are annoying, like one I read on a Buffy list that said "Look, there's no point in me continuing this story if no one is going to send me feedback."

There are no hard and fast statistics to support the idea that the more hard up you sound, the less feedback you'll receive. I can tell you that as a reader of slash fiction on too many mailing lists to mention, seeing someone trying to force me to send feedback does not inspire me to send it. It has the opposite effect.

I guess it all boils down to why you write. Do you write for enjoyment, or do you write to be read? There's nothing wrong with writing to be read, but you can't force people to read it, and you definitely can't force people to send you nice comments. The harder you try, the more of an annoyance you become.

Also, the logic of abandoning a story because you haven't gotten sufficient feedback baffles me. The best stories, I propose, are the ones the author can't abandon. They're the stories that follow the author around all day and inspire him or her to sit down in front of the computer at the first opportunity. If you are willing to abandon something you've put so much time and energy into just because you feel there aren't enough people paying attention, how important was the story to you in the first place?

I also propose that the amount of feedback you receive does not always directly correspond to how good a story is. A heavy hitter in a fandom is more likely to receive a lot of feedback simply because everyone knows her. A newbie can wander in, post one smashing story and then unsubscribe and receive one e-mail for her trouble.

So to everyone who begs for feedback, please stop making a scene. And please stop threatening to abandon the story if you don't receive feedback. The next time I read a message from someone saying "If I don't get feedback, I won't continue this story," I'm going to reply "Then don't." Something you can abandon that easily isn't something I'm willing to spend my time reading anyway.

I believe that if someone reads your story and enjoys it, they're going to let you know, anyway. So how about, in the header next to where it says "feedback," you write "Yes, please" or something equally as understated? Then you can let us all get some peace around here. We are not here to feed your ego.

- bitch to Jane