By Nancy

I got this email last night from a rather well-known boy band slash writer who got this link (and this one) from another writer. This was the link to an X-Files and etc. slasher's weblog, a writer by the name of Thete *. This person goes on to rip RPS a new asshole by making the usual broad generalizations about boy bands: they're all "shallow prostitutes," untalented, and have no future. In the entry above it she speaks of how RPS isn't illegal now but just might be soon, and how RPS writers are "stupidly insensitive" to barge in on a real person's love life like that.

I've bounced around other fandoms in the past (X Files, Highlander, Sentinel, Buffy), and I have something to say to all of you other slash writers out there: stop fucking with RPS. Plain and simple.

I can't begin to figure out what's so wrong or immoral or despicable about RPS to most other slash writers. Apparently Thete is so disgusted by pop music in general that she decides to go off on a tangent that implies that since boy bands suck so badly, then RPS must suck too. Jesus. It really would have been nice to see her actually deliver some real reasons why RPS disgusts her so much, but maybe I missed them through all the bullshit in that blog. She goes on to list some of her favorite musicians that she'd like to see slashed, which were mostly "depressed" whiny goth kids, and after seeing a list that included Switchblade Symphony and Tori Amos, I think I understand why she's so fucking angry in the first place. Put on some Enya and smile, goddamnit.

Thete seems to think that since she writes character slash, that gives her a certain edge over a boy band slasher in the way of coolness, and she couldn't be more wrong.

Love,
Nancy.

RPS is no worse than "regular" slash, and here's why. First off, they're both pretty dorky. Don't agree? Let's think about it: what kind of person sits behind a computer saying, "Wouldn't it be awesome if Mulder and Krycek did it in a corn field while a big ol' alien ship takes off?" or "I'd love to see Lance and Justin get kidnapped and taken to upstate New York where they do it in an attic all the time." A dork. A big fucking dork. I've embraced my dorkiness, and you should too.

Also, RPS is completely legal. It's the same as telling a joke or MTV writing that skit about 'N Sync blasting an asterisk out of the sky. She talks about how these RPS sites can be found all over the 'net and how anyone's publicist can happen upon them and the legal trouble that can ensue. With regular slash, people are dealing with licensed characters and creations of someone else, and though it's illegal according to copyright laws, most of the owners of these characters don't care enough to actually sue a slasher. Also, seeing as how we have the first amendment and all, a boy band slash case would never even make it into an American court of law.

RPS requires just as much creativity as an X-Files or Xena slash story, I promise you. Of course there's not the issue of aliens or Ancient Greece to contend with, but trust me when I say that it IS kind of difficult to write a fight scene including five guys and pug on a tour bus.

I've asked slashers from Sentinel and Star Trek fandoms what's so unappealing about RPS, and it always seems like there's never a good answer. Answers always run along the lines of "boy bands suck," and I'm sorry, but that's the weakest shit I've ever heard in my life.

Many slashers argue about the moral implications of RPS, and personally I don't think anything's wrong with it. You assume that Home Box Office doesn't mind the idea of Tobias Beecher and Leo Glen fucking on the lethal injection bed, but Justin Timberlake is somewhere crying in a shower and wanting to sue because he just read himself giving Chris Kirkpatrick a blowjob? Give me a break, people. Really. And Justin Timberlake can't sue for his thoughts being violated, but HBO could wipe the floor with an Oz slasher in court.

I guess that my point is this: RPS writers work just as hard as other slashers, and simply because the subjects of a story might be hokey and cute to some doesn't mean that the story itself will be all filler and no killer. There's RPS out there that knocks the shit out of other slash, and it would be nice if other fandoms would embrace this one. It almost seems to be a bit of a trend to hate on RPS in other fandoms, and let me reiterate my earlier point: no matter what kind of slash you write, it's still slash, and the X-Files slasher is just as uncool as the Backstreet Boy slasher.

* Otherwise known as Te. - Jane